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1
00:00:06,887 --> 00:00:09,050
There it is.
2
00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:11,342
Valencia.
3
00:00:11,342 --> 00:00:13,054
How do you think
This should go down?
4
00:00:13,054 --> 00:00:14,014
Do you think
I should save the kingdom
5
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,516
And then rescue madalena?
6
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,138
Or do you think
I should rescue, then save?
7
00:00:17,138 --> 00:00:20,521
'cause I just want it to have
A dramatic build, you know?
8
00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:22,193
I mean, either way,
9
00:00:22,193 --> 00:00:24,024
We're all gonna live
Happily ever after.
10
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,606
Yep.
11
00:00:25,606 --> 00:00:27,108
I'm sure that's exactly how
It's going to be.
12
00:00:27,108 --> 00:00:28,449
Especially the living part.
13
00:00:28,449 --> 00:00:30,111
For you.
14
00:00:30,111 --> 00:00:32,032
No reason why
You wouldn't keep on living.
15
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,245
Your life.
[ chuckles ]
16
00:00:34,245 --> 00:00:36,036
You know
You're talking, right?
17
00:00:43,124 --> 00:00:51,132
♪ I can't believe
We're al-l-mo-o-st the-e-e-re ♪
18
00:00:58,519 --> 00:01:04,685
♪ I can't believe
He's al-l-mo-o-st here ♪
19
00:01:04,685 --> 00:01:06,397
You're
Little valencian princess
20
00:01:06,397 --> 00:01:08,319
Is leading galavant
Right into my trap.
21
00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:11,031
He'll be here tonight
As the sun has cast
22
00:01:11,031 --> 00:01:13,114
Its last shadow
Upon the earth
23
00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:16,287
And the crescent moon is risen
Above the eastern ridge.
24
00:01:16,287 --> 00:01:18,119
So, like 9:00?
25
00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:18,999
[ sighs ]
26
00:01:18,999 --> 00:01:21,122
Yes, gareth,
He'll be here at 9:00.
27
00:01:21,122 --> 00:01:23,414
And I cannot wait!
28
00:01:23,414 --> 00:01:25,916
I will kill galavant
In front of the queen,
29
00:01:25,916 --> 00:01:28,419
Surprise her with the jewel,
And then finally bed
30
00:01:28,419 --> 00:01:31,132
The most delicate flower
In the seven realms.
31
00:01:31,132 --> 00:01:33,214
Attention, donkey turds!
32
00:01:33,214 --> 00:01:35,216
Where is that pox-ridden
Sack of deformities
33
00:01:35,216 --> 00:01:36,387
Known as my hand maiden?
34
00:01:36,387 --> 00:01:37,638
My hair is a disaster.
35
00:01:37,638 --> 00:01:39,720
Gwynne?
36
00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:40,851
My hair!
37
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:42,313
Forgive me, my queen.
38
00:01:43,984 --> 00:01:46,026
Was that
Too much to ask?
39
00:01:46,026 --> 00:01:47,988
[ scoffs ]
40
00:01:47,988 --> 00:01:50,191
Just think about it, hmm?
41
00:01:50,191 --> 00:01:53,734
We could, uh, we could do
A picnic, you know?
42
00:01:53,734 --> 00:01:54,995
Something super cazh.
43
00:01:54,995 --> 00:01:59,119
For the hundredth time, no.
44
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,661
Your mouth is saying no,
45
00:02:00,661 --> 00:02:02,293
But I can see your rotten teeth
Through that smile.
46
00:02:02,293 --> 00:02:03,454
Go on, you!
47
00:02:04,415 --> 00:02:06,297
She's going to be
So surprised!
48
00:02:06,297 --> 00:02:08,589
No, she's not
Because you keep doing
49
00:02:08,589 --> 00:02:10,841
That stupid
"Evil king whisper" thing
50
00:02:10,841 --> 00:02:12,012
That everyone can hear.
51
00:02:12,012 --> 00:02:14,054
How about this?
Lower.
52
00:02:14,054 --> 00:02:15,806
[ deep voice ]
How about this?
Oh, please.
53
00:02:15,806 --> 00:02:17,097
[ normal voice ] Oh, come on.
That was good.
54
00:02:17,097 --> 00:02:19,220
For god's sakes, gareth.
You're allowed to laugh.
55
00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:20,471
What are you two
Yabbering about?
56
00:02:20,471 --> 00:02:23,264
Nothing, darling.
Nothing going on.
57
00:02:23,264 --> 00:02:26,187
That's right.
There is nothing going on.
58
00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:28,399
I've been waiting for you
To find that jewel
59
00:02:28,399 --> 00:02:31,192
Since we invaded this
Wretched kingdom a year ago!
60
00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:34,365
Maddie, baby...Chill.
61
00:02:34,365 --> 00:02:38,199
These things have a way
Of...Working themselves out.
62
00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:39,990
Why are you so calm?
63
00:02:39,990 --> 00:02:42,082
Normally when I yell at you,
You get tummy cramps
64
00:02:42,082 --> 00:02:43,994
And have to go poopy --
Your words.
65
00:02:43,994 --> 00:02:45,996
What can I say?
66
00:02:45,996 --> 00:02:49,210
I'm sleeping well, exercising,
Laying off the wheat.
67
00:02:49,210 --> 00:02:51,252
Just in a really good place
Right now.
68
00:02:51,252 --> 00:02:53,424
You're inept.
69
00:02:53,424 --> 00:02:56,217
You're all inept!
70
00:02:56,217 --> 00:02:58,679
I can't even look
At any of you anymore.
71
00:03:03,974 --> 00:03:05,726
♪ my husband's a wimp ♪
72
00:03:05,726 --> 00:03:08,399
♪ his henchmen
Are simply useless ♪
73
00:03:08,399 --> 00:03:10,901
♪ the servants and staff ♪
74
00:03:10,901 --> 00:03:14,154
♪ are inbreeds
And half-wits, too ♪
75
00:03:14,154 --> 00:03:17,658
♪ oh, god,
How I need someone here ♪
76
00:03:17,658 --> 00:03:20,120
♪ willing to get things
Done here ♪
77
00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:23,784
♪ someone who shares
My point of view ♪
78
00:03:23,784 --> 00:03:26,787
♪ but who?! ♪
79
00:03:26,787 --> 00:03:28,749
♪ it's you ♪
80
00:03:28,749 --> 00:03:32,212
♪ no one but you ♪
81
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:34,715
♪ no one's as smart
And hard of heart ♪
82
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,427
♪ and looks the part ♪
83
00:03:36,427 --> 00:03:37,758
♪ like you ♪
84
00:03:37,758 --> 00:03:40,050
♪ who'd pull off a coup d'etat
Like you ♪
85
00:03:40,050 --> 00:03:42,393
♪ while rockin'
A push-up bra like you? ♪
86
00:03:42,393 --> 00:03:45,516
♪ well, here's a clue,
No one but you ♪
87
00:03:45,516 --> 00:03:46,767
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
88
00:03:46,767 --> 00:03:49,059
♪ no one but me ♪
89
00:03:49,059 --> 00:03:51,151
♪ nobody wheels
And double-deals ♪
90
00:03:51,151 --> 00:03:54,154
♪ in killer heels like me ♪
91
00:03:54,154 --> 00:03:56,487
♪ there's nobody
Who could rule like you ♪
92
00:03:56,487 --> 00:03:59,450
♪ while making her subjects
Drool like you ♪
93
00:03:59,450 --> 00:04:01,031
♪ while tough
To the core like you ♪
94
00:04:01,031 --> 00:04:04,995
♪ let's face it,
Who's more like you than you? ♪
95
00:04:04,995 --> 00:04:07,458
♪ no one but you ♪
96
00:04:07,458 --> 00:04:09,870
♪ who has the brains
To break her chains ♪
97
00:04:09,870 --> 00:04:11,422
♪ and seize the reins? ♪
98
00:04:11,422 --> 00:04:13,173
♪ yeah, you ♪
99
00:04:13,173 --> 00:04:15,005
♪ it's been quite
The social climb for you ♪
100
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:17,468
♪ and, honey,
At last it's time for you ♪
101
00:04:17,468 --> 00:04:19,640
♪ so, answer the call for you ♪
102
00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:22,052
♪ and go take it all for you ♪
103
00:04:22,052 --> 00:04:24,014
♪ who else is going to? ♪
104
00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:25,015
♪ yes, who? ♪
105
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,688
♪ no one ♪
106
00:04:27,688 --> 00:04:29,650
♪ but yo-o-o-u ♪
107
00:04:29,650 --> 00:04:31,392
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
108
00:04:31,392 --> 00:04:33,103
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
♪ you ♪
109
00:04:33,103 --> 00:04:35,105
Get it, girl!
You the queen!
110
00:04:35,105 --> 00:04:43,574
[ all cheering ]
Go get 'em, girl!
111
00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:46,166
[ horse snorts ]
112
00:04:46,166 --> 00:04:48,669
Oh, sorry.
I really had to pee.
113
00:04:48,669 --> 00:04:51,792
It takes so long to undo all
The laces on my riding pants.
114
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,124
You know, someone should come up
With something
115
00:04:54,124 --> 00:04:56,467
Around the crotch
That would just go "Zip."
116
00:04:56,467 --> 00:04:58,759
You could do your business
And be done with it.
117
00:04:58,759 --> 00:05:01,632
That is the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.
118
00:05:01,632 --> 00:05:02,763
Tell him, izzy.
119
00:05:02,763 --> 00:05:04,094
It's not
A great idea, sid.
120
00:05:04,094 --> 00:05:05,556
Are you sure?
121
00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:06,927
I really feel like
I'm on to something.
122
00:05:06,927 --> 00:05:08,639
Can we just focus?
123
00:05:08,639 --> 00:05:10,100
We've got
A castle to storm.
124
00:05:10,100 --> 00:05:13,063
The sun's almost perfect
For hero lighting.
125
00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:14,855
I should do
Some push-ups.
126
00:05:14,855 --> 00:05:18,318
But wouldn't it be better
To storm the castle later?
127
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,110
Ooh, how about
On a wednesday?
128
00:05:20,110 --> 00:05:21,862
You never hear of anyone
Storming a castle
129
00:05:21,862 --> 00:05:22,823
On a wednesday.
130
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,034
The thing is,
Is wednesdays
131
00:05:24,034 --> 00:05:25,115
Are quite hard
To rhyme with.
132
00:05:25,115 --> 00:05:26,867
And I'm pretty much
100% sure
133
00:05:26,867 --> 00:05:28,499
They're gonna write songs
About this one, so...
134
00:05:28,499 --> 00:05:30,451
Interlocking little teeth
135
00:05:30,451 --> 00:05:32,623
Right in the front of your pants
That zip together.
136
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:34,455
Sid!
You're embarrassing
Yourself.
137
00:05:34,455 --> 00:05:38,459
I mean, it just feels like
You're rushing it.
138
00:05:38,459 --> 00:05:41,882
If you took the time
To think about it...
139
00:05:41,882 --> 00:05:45,135
You smell. Really bad.
140
00:05:45,135 --> 00:05:48,098
Princess, I'm a knight
Of the seven realms
141
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:49,890
About to ride into
A battle so epic --
142
00:05:49,890 --> 00:05:51,602
Oh, god, yeah.
Yeah, we should find a place.
143
00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:53,183
I need to wash up.
144
00:05:53,183 --> 00:05:54,685
Oh. Good.
145
00:05:54,685 --> 00:05:57,067
I thought I was having a bath.
This is a church.
146
00:05:57,067 --> 00:05:59,440
This isn't
Just a church.
147
00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:03,744
It's the most famed and revered
Monastery in valencia.
148
00:06:03,744 --> 00:06:05,536
[ sighs ]
149
00:06:05,536 --> 00:06:07,948
♪ bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
150
00:06:07,948 --> 00:06:11,041
♪ welcome to our abbey,
The best in the domain ♪
151
00:06:11,041 --> 00:06:13,544
♪ the order of our father
Of perpetual refrain ♪
152
00:06:13,544 --> 00:06:15,125
♪ and we're the monks ♪
153
00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:17,207
♪ hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
154
00:06:17,207 --> 00:06:18,799
Back story, please.
♪ hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
155
00:06:18,799 --> 00:06:20,801
Valencian monks all take
A vow of singing.
156
00:06:20,801 --> 00:06:22,803
Oh, bravo!
[ sighs ] Kill me.
♪ hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
157
00:06:22,803 --> 00:06:24,094
♪ come in if you are weary ♪
158
00:06:24,094 --> 00:06:25,426
♪ there's food
If you would dine ♪
159
00:06:25,426 --> 00:06:28,559
♪ plus 31 varieties
Of sacramental wine ♪
160
00:06:28,559 --> 00:06:29,720
♪ and we're the monks ♪
161
00:06:30,561 --> 00:06:32,142
♪ hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
162
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,725
♪ hmmm ♪
♪ bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
163
00:06:34,725 --> 00:06:35,896
♪ I'm the smart one ♪
164
00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,608
♪ ahh, hallelu ♪
165
00:06:37,608 --> 00:06:39,069
♪ I'm the cute one ♪
166
00:06:39,069 --> 00:06:40,691
♪ boopsy-doo ♪
167
00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:42,112
♪ I'm the shy one ♪
168
00:06:42,112 --> 00:06:43,153
♪ peekaboo ♪
169
00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:45,155
♪ and I'm the bad boy ♪
170
00:06:45,155 --> 00:06:47,828
♪ but not so bad
'cause I'm a monk ♪
171
00:06:47,828 --> 00:06:49,700
♪ bless you, children ♪
♪ ooh ooh ooh-ooh ♪
172
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:52,122
[ vocalizing ]
We seek shelter...
173
00:06:52,122 --> 00:06:55,295
Water for our horses,
And a bath for my friend.
174
00:06:55,295 --> 00:06:58,128
♪ we'll fetch the holy water
And holy soap, as well ♪
175
00:06:58,128 --> 00:07:01,001
♪ 'cause, holy guacamole,
That one reeks to holy hell ♪
176
00:07:01,001 --> 00:07:03,003
♪ and we're the monks ♪
177
00:07:03,003 --> 00:07:04,925
♪ hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
178
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,467
♪ ooh wee-ahh ♪
179
00:07:06,467 --> 00:07:09,139
♪ jazz hands ♪
180
00:07:09,139 --> 00:07:10,310
♪ yeah! ♪
181
00:07:10,310 --> 00:07:12,473
Can't we just have
A normal adventure?
182
00:07:14,815 --> 00:07:18,018
Is there anyone available
To counsel a person
183
00:07:18,018 --> 00:07:20,060
Who might,
Through no fault of her own,
184
00:07:20,060 --> 00:07:22,563
Be feeling guilty about a
Fatal plot she's put into motion
185
00:07:22,563 --> 00:07:24,485
Which could lead
To the demise of someone
186
00:07:24,485 --> 00:07:26,066
She's grown
A little fond of?
187
00:07:26,066 --> 00:07:27,067
[ note plays ]
188
00:07:27,067 --> 00:07:28,989
Just nod yes or no.
189
00:07:31,121 --> 00:07:32,452
[ bird cries ]
190
00:07:36,877 --> 00:07:39,039
Madalena:
Where are the kitchen trolls?
191
00:07:41,081 --> 00:07:42,002
Ah.
192
00:07:43,584 --> 00:07:45,506
Hey, m'lady.
193
00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:48,218
Who do I have to disembowel
Around here to get a cup of tea?
194
00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:50,390
Oh, a thousand apologies.
195
00:07:50,390 --> 00:07:53,393
I was busy preparing
For tonight's celebration.
196
00:07:53,393 --> 00:07:54,765
Celebration for what?
197
00:07:54,765 --> 00:07:56,146
Oh, I --
I wouldn't know.
198
00:07:56,146 --> 00:07:58,148
I-I'm just trying
To stay alive,
199
00:07:58,148 --> 00:08:01,061
And I find it helps
Not to ask too many questions.
200
00:08:06,446 --> 00:08:08,659
You're close with the king,
Aren't you?
201
00:08:08,659 --> 00:08:12,663
Eh, I wouldn't call us close,
But we hang, yeah.
202
00:08:12,663 --> 00:08:14,204
[ chuckles ]
203
00:08:14,204 --> 00:08:17,117
And, um, you fancy gwynne,
My hand maiden.
204
00:08:17,117 --> 00:08:19,119
Sha'!
205
00:08:19,119 --> 00:08:23,884
Listen, I know richard's
Keeping something from me.
206
00:08:23,884 --> 00:08:26,256
You find out
What he has up his sleeve,
207
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:30,591
And I will help you
Get gwynne into your bed.
208
00:08:30,591 --> 00:08:32,182
Ooh. [ chuckles ]
209
00:08:32,182 --> 00:08:34,184
A generous offer,
My queen,
210
00:08:34,184 --> 00:08:36,186
But I'm not even sure
We could both fit into my bed.
211
00:08:38,138 --> 00:08:39,349
You sleep in the kitchen?
212
00:08:39,349 --> 00:08:42,563
Or...
Do I cook in my room?
213
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:45,355
Why do I even talk
To poor people?
214
00:08:45,355 --> 00:08:47,738
Do we have a deal?
215
00:08:47,738 --> 00:08:48,989
What the hell?
216
00:08:48,989 --> 00:08:51,111
I need all the help
I can get.
217
00:08:51,111 --> 00:08:52,953
I sleep
In a freaking kitchen.
218
00:08:52,953 --> 00:08:54,074
Okay.
219
00:08:54,074 --> 00:08:56,997
The king is having
A secret meeting
220
00:08:56,997 --> 00:08:59,209
Where I'm to serve snacks
And a light refreshment
221
00:08:59,209 --> 00:09:01,541
As soon as the croaks
Of the frogs
222
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,463
Usher in
The raven's last call.
223
00:09:03,463 --> 00:09:05,125
So, like 9:00?
224
00:09:05,125 --> 00:09:06,837
Yeah, 9:00.
225
00:09:06,837 --> 00:09:08,008
Excellent.
226
00:09:08,008 --> 00:09:09,970
Take me there.
227
00:09:09,970 --> 00:09:11,972
Yes, m'lady.
228
00:09:11,972 --> 00:09:15,055
And king richard said
If I didn't bring the jewel
229
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:17,097
And galavant back,
He'd kill my parents.
230
00:09:17,097 --> 00:09:18,599
So, I lied to galavant
231
00:09:18,599 --> 00:09:20,440
And told him
That the queen still loved him.
232
00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:22,603
He's walking into
A trap of my own making!
233
00:09:22,603 --> 00:09:24,314
[ sighs ]
What can I do?
234
00:09:25,776 --> 00:09:27,447
Break your vow,
Or I break your pipe.
235
00:09:29,029 --> 00:09:30,530
[ sighs ]
236
00:09:30,530 --> 00:09:33,573
♪ bum ba-dum bum bum bum ♪
So, uh...
237
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:34,995
♪ bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
238
00:09:34,995 --> 00:09:38,368
So, basically, you made a deal
With the evil king,
239
00:09:38,368 --> 00:09:40,871
But that was before you fell
For the handsome knight --
240
00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:43,043
[ singing in background
Continues ]
Fell -- fell for what?
Fell for him?
241
00:09:43,043 --> 00:09:45,165
My child, if you argue,
I'm never gonna be able
242
00:09:45,165 --> 00:09:46,627
To make it back in time
For their big finish.
243
00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:48,208
[ sighs ]
But I need your advice.
244
00:09:48,208 --> 00:09:50,210
I'm supposed to bring galavant
To the king
245
00:09:50,210 --> 00:09:51,421
When the barking
Of the hounds
246
00:09:51,421 --> 00:09:53,053
Wakens the fairies
In the evening
247
00:09:53,053 --> 00:09:54,975
So that they may begin
Their nocturnal dance.
248
00:09:54,975 --> 00:09:57,177
So, like 9:00?
249
00:09:57,177 --> 00:09:59,429
Yeah. 9:00.
250
00:09:59,429 --> 00:10:01,722
[ dogs howling ]
251
00:10:01,722 --> 00:10:06,146
It's 9:03. Why am I the only one
Who's ever on time?
252
00:10:06,146 --> 00:10:10,070
There should be
A standardized system
253
00:10:10,070 --> 00:10:12,532
Based on the rotation
Of the earth
254
00:10:12,532 --> 00:10:15,736
In relation to its position
To the sun and the moon.
255
00:10:15,736 --> 00:10:18,078
[ scoffs ]
You sound like a witch.
256
00:10:18,078 --> 00:10:21,161
Regardless,
It is very rude of galavant
257
00:10:21,161 --> 00:10:23,203
To be late
To his own killing.
258
00:10:23,203 --> 00:10:25,165
Galavant's coming?
259
00:10:25,165 --> 00:10:27,167
The king didn't give me
A head count.
260
00:10:27,167 --> 00:10:29,419
Oh, I came up
With the most perfect line
261
00:10:29,419 --> 00:10:31,171
For when
I first see him.
262
00:10:31,171 --> 00:10:33,553
In my most intimidating voice,
I'm going to say,
263
00:10:33,553 --> 00:10:37,057
[ deep voice ]
"Well, well, well" --
264
00:10:37,057 --> 00:10:38,558
[ normal voice ]
Nope. I'm gonna save it.
265
00:10:38,558 --> 00:10:39,599
[ door opens ]
266
00:10:39,599 --> 00:10:40,851
Oh. Here we go.
267
00:10:43,223 --> 00:10:45,645
[ deep voice ]
Well, well...
268
00:10:46,817 --> 00:10:47,858
[ normal voice ]
Where the hell's galavant?
269
00:10:47,858 --> 00:10:49,149
There's been
A change in plans.
270
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:52,362
You'll get the jewel
And set my parents free,
271
00:10:52,362 --> 00:10:53,984
But galavant stays alive.
272
00:10:53,984 --> 00:10:55,866
I see.
273
00:10:55,866 --> 00:10:57,948
How utterly predictable.
274
00:10:57,948 --> 00:11:00,991
The princess has fallen
For the noble knight.
275
00:11:00,991 --> 00:11:03,163
Of course she has.
276
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,125
I can't let
A guy like that live.
277
00:11:05,125 --> 00:11:06,336
Well,
Then the deal is off.
278
00:11:06,336 --> 00:11:08,128
You'll never see
The jewel again.
279
00:11:08,128 --> 00:11:11,051
You're adorable.
280
00:11:11,051 --> 00:11:12,342
No, my darling.
281
00:11:12,342 --> 00:11:15,095
You see,
You will bring me galavant
282
00:11:15,095 --> 00:11:20,640
And the jewel or else
You'll suffer the same fate...
283
00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:22,062
As your parents!
284
00:11:22,062 --> 00:11:23,103
[ gasps ]
285
00:11:23,103 --> 00:11:26,146
It's all right, honey.
We're alive.
286
00:11:26,146 --> 00:11:28,188
What?!
287
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:29,519
The king convinced us
It would be funny.
288
00:11:29,519 --> 00:11:31,862
We've been prisoners
A long time.
289
00:11:31,862 --> 00:11:33,233
We lost perspective.
290
00:11:33,233 --> 00:11:36,406
[ laughing ]
You should have seen your face!
291
00:11:36,406 --> 00:11:37,868
You were like, "Aah!"
292
00:11:37,868 --> 00:11:39,119
[ laughing ]
293
00:11:39,119 --> 00:11:40,030
"Ooh!"
294
00:11:40,030 --> 00:11:41,822
[ sighs ]
Oh, but make no mistake.
295
00:11:41,822 --> 00:11:43,703
If you don't bring me galavant,
I will kill them.
296
00:11:45,035 --> 00:11:46,496
For realsies.
297
00:11:52,292 --> 00:11:54,254
♪ and we're the monks,
Hey, hey, we're the monks ♪
298
00:11:54,254 --> 00:11:56,716
♪ yeah ♪
299
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,048
What's happening?
300
00:11:58,048 --> 00:11:59,259
I'll tell you
What's happening.
301
00:11:59,259 --> 00:12:01,051
Our sid sings
Like a freaking angel.
302
00:12:01,051 --> 00:12:02,973
No, this plan,
This whole thing.
303
00:12:02,973 --> 00:12:04,805
How did it come to this?
304
00:12:04,805 --> 00:12:06,106
Princess, relax.
305
00:12:06,106 --> 00:12:07,557
It's gonna go great.
306
00:12:07,557 --> 00:12:10,610
They already expect these guys
To perform at the castle.
307
00:12:10,610 --> 00:12:12,983
We're just gonna
Sneak in with them
308
00:12:12,983 --> 00:12:15,025
And infiltrate
From the inside.
309
00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:16,486
[ clears throat ]
310
00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:18,528
Turns out you were right.
311
00:12:18,528 --> 00:12:20,740
As usual, I needed
A better plan.
312
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,202
[ sighs ] Galavant --
313
00:12:22,202 --> 00:12:24,164
I'm only magnanimous
Once every 10 years,
314
00:12:24,164 --> 00:12:25,745
So just let this happen.
315
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,789
You saw the best
In me and...
316
00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:33,083
Ultimately reminded me what
It means to be a real knight.
317
00:12:33,083 --> 00:12:34,174
And here we are.
318
00:12:34,174 --> 00:12:36,797
So, thank you...
319
00:12:36,797 --> 00:12:41,221
For bringing me
Back to me.
320
00:12:41,221 --> 00:12:45,185
Against all the odds,
It's, um...
321
00:12:45,185 --> 00:12:48,148
Well,
It's been a pleasure.
322
00:12:48,148 --> 00:12:52,352
You really don't
Have to thank me for anything.
323
00:12:52,352 --> 00:12:56,606
You actually have
A lot of nice qualities...
324
00:12:56,606 --> 00:12:57,948
All on your own.
325
00:12:57,948 --> 00:12:58,698
[ chuckles ]
326
00:12:58,698 --> 00:13:00,400
Careful, princess.
327
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,452
You're getting dangerously close
To paying me a compliment.
328
00:13:02,452 --> 00:13:05,115
I can do compliments.
329
00:13:05,115 --> 00:13:08,118
I mean, you know your way
Around a horse,
330
00:13:08,118 --> 00:13:11,041
You're not so bad
With a sword,
331
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,712
And your beard
Magically stays
332
00:13:12,712 --> 00:13:14,174
The same length
All the time.
333
00:13:14,174 --> 00:13:15,876
[ chuckles ]
334
00:13:15,876 --> 00:13:21,051
And...You have an ability to see
The best in people
335
00:13:21,051 --> 00:13:23,423
Even after they've
Wronged you.
336
00:13:25,475 --> 00:13:28,348
Like with madalena.
337
00:13:28,348 --> 00:13:29,980
Right.
338
00:13:29,980 --> 00:13:31,852
Madalena.
339
00:13:31,852 --> 00:13:36,066
Oh, man, this robe
Is really itching my junk.
340
00:13:36,066 --> 00:13:38,818
Oh, you left your clothes on
Underneath.
341
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,110
Right.
342
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:43,904
[ sighs ]
343
00:13:51,791 --> 00:13:54,374
I hope you're pleased
With what I've shown you.
344
00:13:54,374 --> 00:13:56,046
Judging by the pressure
345
00:13:56,046 --> 00:13:58,508
And what seems like the amount
Of exclamation points,
346
00:13:58,508 --> 00:14:00,380
It's a little hard
To tell.
347
00:14:00,380 --> 00:14:02,132
This is the writing
Of a happy queen
348
00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:03,803
Who's decided
To take control
349
00:14:03,803 --> 00:14:05,635
And set a secret, evil plan
In motion.
350
00:14:05,635 --> 00:14:07,267
Ooh!
351
00:14:07,267 --> 00:14:11,141
Let's keep that last part
Just between the two of us.
352
00:14:11,141 --> 00:14:12,893
For your fastest pigeon.
353
00:14:12,893 --> 00:14:16,686
This absolutely, positively
Has to be there overnight.
354
00:14:16,686 --> 00:14:20,530
You upheld your end of the
Bargain, so I'll uphold mine.
355
00:14:20,530 --> 00:14:22,112
You have my permission
To make
356
00:14:22,112 --> 00:14:23,573
The most romantic
Of meals tonight
357
00:14:23,573 --> 00:14:25,035
For you
And my hand maiden.
358
00:14:25,035 --> 00:14:27,037
Spare no expense --
Fresh oysters, braised rabbit,
359
00:14:27,037 --> 00:14:29,199
And a nice bordeaux
From my private cellar.
360
00:14:29,199 --> 00:14:31,081
Oh, I don't even know
If she'll say yes.
361
00:14:31,081 --> 00:14:32,702
I mean,
We flirt and stuff,
362
00:14:32,702 --> 00:14:34,664
But when I ask her
On a date, bubkes.
363
00:14:34,664 --> 00:14:36,957
God, do I have to do everything
Around here?
364
00:14:36,957 --> 00:14:38,798
[ door opens ]
Madalena: gwynne!
365
00:14:38,798 --> 00:14:41,171
You're having dinner tonight
With smallpox over here.
366
00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:43,053
Yes, m'lady.
367
00:14:43,053 --> 00:14:45,345
You two aren't cousins
Or anything, are you?
368
00:14:45,345 --> 00:14:48,508
Ah, who cares? You guys couldn't
Get any weirder looking.
369
00:14:48,508 --> 00:14:50,140
[ door closes ]
370
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,475
I know a hook-up
From your boss
371
00:14:55,475 --> 00:14:58,068
Isn't the smoothest thing,
But...
372
00:14:58,068 --> 00:15:00,150
I don't care.
373
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:03,443
Because, truthfully, I think
We could be great together.
374
00:15:03,443 --> 00:15:07,027
But love isn't meant
For people like us.
375
00:15:07,027 --> 00:15:09,909
I beg to differ.
376
00:15:12,792 --> 00:15:17,627
♪ if I could share my life
With you ♪
377
00:15:17,627 --> 00:15:21,671
♪ just think
How happy we'd be ♪
378
00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:25,805
♪ we'd share our hovel
Built for two ♪
379
00:15:25,805 --> 00:15:28,048
♪ complete with vermin
For three ♪
380
00:15:28,048 --> 00:15:29,549
[ chuckles ]
381
00:15:29,549 --> 00:15:33,553
♪ we could while away
Each hopeless day ♪
382
00:15:33,553 --> 00:15:37,057
♪ comparing open sores ♪
383
00:15:37,057 --> 00:15:40,981
♪ yes, life would blow,
But much less, though ♪
384
00:15:40,981 --> 00:15:44,324
♪ if I could share mine
With yours ♪
385
00:15:44,324 --> 00:15:47,447
No, I can't.
It's impossible!
386
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:51,331
♪ if I could share my life
With you ♪
387
00:15:51,331 --> 00:15:54,374
♪ admit it,
It would be nice ♪
388
00:15:54,374 --> 00:15:59,209
♪ we'd share one cot,
One chamber pot ♪
389
00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:03,343
♪ plus trench mouth,
Tapeworms, and lice ♪
390
00:16:03,343 --> 00:16:06,926
♪ we would have
A dozen kids ♪
391
00:16:06,926 --> 00:16:11,301
♪ and maybe
One won't die ♪
392
00:16:11,301 --> 00:16:12,512
♪ and the plague ♪
393
00:16:12,512 --> 00:16:13,683
♪ the runs ♪
394
00:16:13,683 --> 00:16:15,645
♪ invading huns ♪
395
00:16:15,645 --> 00:16:19,229
♪ just think
How time would fly ♪
396
00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:23,063
♪ if you could share
Your life with me ♪
397
00:16:23,063 --> 00:16:27,067
♪ I'll cherish
Every foul breath ♪
398
00:16:27,067 --> 00:16:29,069
♪ the filth ♪
♪ the rot ♪
399
00:16:29,069 --> 00:16:31,451
♪ the leprosy ♪
400
00:16:31,451 --> 00:16:35,205
♪ the painful,
Lingering death ♪
401
00:16:35,205 --> 00:16:39,459
♪ thank the lord
Our life expectancy ♪
402
00:16:39,459 --> 00:16:42,212
♪ is merely 32 ♪
403
00:16:44,464 --> 00:16:49,509
♪ yeah, it might be
Sweet misery ♪
404
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:59,769
♪ to share what's left
With yo-o-o-u ♪
405
00:17:01,191 --> 00:17:05,195
So, me, you, dinner tonight,
My place.
406
00:17:05,195 --> 00:17:06,986
You bring that pretty
Little smile of yours,
407
00:17:06,986 --> 00:17:08,698
And I'll supply
The rest.
408
00:17:08,698 --> 00:17:11,111
Yes!
[ chuckles ]
409
00:17:21,211 --> 00:17:24,964
Right, princess. You ready
To get your kingdom back?
410
00:17:24,964 --> 00:17:26,506
I've been thinking.
411
00:17:26,506 --> 00:17:28,798
I can get another kingdom.
It's a buyer's market right now.
412
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:30,170
Let's just
Free my parents,
413
00:17:30,170 --> 00:17:31,381
Get madalena,
And get us out of here.
414
00:17:31,381 --> 00:17:32,592
Absolutely not.
415
00:17:32,592 --> 00:17:35,135
When I make a promise,
I keep it.
416
00:17:35,135 --> 00:17:36,806
We're gonna get
Your kingdom back.
417
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,057
But --
Once the concert starts,
418
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,480
We're gonna have about an hour
To move about the castle.
419
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:42,021
Where do you think
They're keeping your parents?
420
00:17:42,021 --> 00:17:45,985
Perhaps
They're up your butt.
421
00:17:45,985 --> 00:17:49,109
Y-you see, because
That's the most unlikely place.
422
00:17:49,109 --> 00:17:50,820
I mean, obviously, her parents
Couldn't be up your --
423
00:17:52,192 --> 00:17:53,993
[ deep voice ]
Well, well, well.
424
00:17:53,993 --> 00:17:55,365
[ normal voice ]
Ah, it's too late.
425
00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:56,616
I had to go
For the stupid butt joke.
426
00:17:56,616 --> 00:17:58,538
Forget it.
Guards, just seize them.
427
00:18:06,466 --> 00:18:08,007
Your move...
428
00:18:08,007 --> 00:18:10,130
'cause I haven't killed
Anybody all day.
429
00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:12,342
Gareth, we agreed
I would say the cool things.
430
00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:15,975
So, what's it gonna be?
Damn it, gareth!
431
00:18:15,975 --> 00:18:17,847
Fine.
432
00:18:17,847 --> 00:18:18,978
Galavant, no!
433
00:18:18,978 --> 00:18:20,810
Now let her go.
434
00:18:20,810 --> 00:18:22,562
She had nothing
To do with this.
435
00:18:22,562 --> 00:18:25,485
You are so noble.
436
00:18:25,485 --> 00:18:27,066
And yet
The women in your life
437
00:18:27,066 --> 00:18:29,028
Never seem to honor
That nobility.
438
00:18:29,028 --> 00:18:32,031
In fact, this one tricked you
Into coming all the way here
439
00:18:32,031 --> 00:18:33,613
So I could kill you.
440
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,697
What?
441
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,831
[ deep voice ]
Well, well, well...
442
00:18:41,831 --> 00:18:44,504
Looks like
It's time for dinner.
443
00:18:44,504 --> 00:18:47,297
Nailed it.
Boom.
444
00:18:52,842 --> 00:18:54,594
But...What the --
All that time...
445
00:18:54,594 --> 00:18:56,676
He may not be able to talk,
But I can.
446
00:18:56,676 --> 00:18:58,218
This is messed up,
Princess!
447
00:18:58,218 --> 00:19:00,520
I didn't have a choice.
He was going to kill my parents.
448
00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:01,721
Shut up!
449
00:19:03,183 --> 00:19:06,316
Well, seems like you kids
Have lots to talk about.
450
00:19:06,316 --> 00:19:08,147
I'll let you get to it.
451
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,729
Oh, but do hurry.
452
00:19:09,729 --> 00:19:12,071
I'm executing galavant
In 10 minutes. Hmm.
453
00:19:12,071 --> 00:19:14,984
It's nice to finally
Have people down here.
454
00:19:14,984 --> 00:19:16,326
Feels lived in.
455
00:19:16,326 --> 00:19:19,739
I'm so sorry.
I wanted to tell you, but I --
456
00:19:19,739 --> 00:19:21,951
But what?
457
00:19:21,951 --> 00:19:23,913
You didn't have time?
458
00:19:23,913 --> 00:19:25,545
Not in the hundreds of miles
We traveled
459
00:19:25,545 --> 00:19:27,166
Or the meals we shared?
460
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:31,501
In retrospect, the trip
Through the forest of honesty
461
00:19:31,501 --> 00:19:33,132
Would have seemed like
An appropriate time.
462
00:19:33,132 --> 00:19:34,554
[ sighs ]
But my family.
463
00:19:34,554 --> 00:19:38,218
Well, perhaps if you'd told me,
We could have made a plan.
464
00:19:38,218 --> 00:19:40,430
[ scoffs ]
And you would have helped me?
465
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:42,602
Even if you had
Nothing to gain from it?
466
00:19:42,602 --> 00:19:46,516
I guess
We'll never find out.
467
00:19:46,516 --> 00:19:49,108
[ door opens ]
468
00:19:49,108 --> 00:19:51,361
If even a single ounce
Of you was real,
469
00:19:51,361 --> 00:19:53,072
Just tell me one thing --
470
00:19:53,072 --> 00:19:54,984
Did madalena want me
To come for her?
471
00:19:54,984 --> 00:19:57,156
I don't know.
472
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:02,081
No!
473
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:06,326
[ humming ]
474
00:20:24,844 --> 00:20:27,347
Not so tough,
Are you now,
475
00:20:27,347 --> 00:20:28,398
Galavan--
476
00:20:28,398 --> 00:20:30,690
Aah!!
477
00:20:30,690 --> 00:20:32,852
Aah!!
478
00:20:39,319 --> 00:20:42,071
Hello, darling.
479
00:20:42,071 --> 00:20:43,493
Madalena?
480
00:20:45,204 --> 00:20:49,709
There's braised rabbit
And bordeaux, your favorites.
481
00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:52,251
You saved me?
482
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,253
Oh, I've done
A lot more than that.
483
00:20:59,969 --> 00:21:01,971
We have a lot
Of catching up to do.
484
00:21:01,971 --> 00:21:06,806
I've written someone,
485
00:21:06,806 --> 00:21:09,439
And he's coming
To execute my plan.
486
00:21:09,439 --> 00:21:11,351
He doesn't play nice.
487
00:21:15,064 --> 00:21:17,156
Everything's
About to change.
35206
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