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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:51,485 --> 00:00:54,222 [BELLS TOLLING] 2 00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:57,491 The plane! The plane! 3 00:01:12,273 --> 00:01:14,142 -Good morning, boss. -Good morning, Tattoo. 4 00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:00,954 [GIRLS GIGGLING] 5 00:02:01,089 --> 00:02:04,592 Smiles, everyone! Smiles! 6 00:02:06,127 --> 00:02:07,428 [BAND PLAYS] 7 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:15,003 MR. ROARKE: Ah, Mr. Andy Durant. 8 00:02:15,269 --> 00:02:17,905 A high school track coach from a small town in Vermont. 9 00:02:18,206 --> 00:02:19,607 TATTOO: Why all the magazines? 10 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:21,875 Because, Tattoo, Mr. Grant has fallen in love 11 00:02:22,010 --> 00:02:24,112 with a lovely model, Ms. Pamela Gentry. 12 00:02:24,245 --> 00:02:26,714 I'm sure those magazines are filled with her pictures. 13 00:02:27,215 --> 00:02:31,119 She did a very popular champagne ad in, uh, 1893. 14 00:02:31,819 --> 00:02:34,555 Boss, he's in love with a 90-year-old woman? 15 00:02:34,755 --> 00:02:35,889 No, no, Tattoo. 16 00:02:36,024 --> 00:02:37,991 I'm afraid Ms. Gentry passed away years ago. 17 00:02:38,192 --> 00:02:40,594 Mr. Durant's fantasy is to meet Ms. Gentry 18 00:02:40,728 --> 00:02:42,496 as she was at the height of her beauty. 19 00:02:43,064 --> 00:02:44,932 TATTOO: Boss, how are you going to do that? 20 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:47,435 By sending him Victorian England, 21 00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:51,872 where not only Ms. Gentry, but a great danger awaits him. 22 00:02:55,609 --> 00:02:57,511 TATTOO: Boss, isn't that Angela Marckham, 23 00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:59,980 -the famous movie star? -MR. ROARKE: Movie star? 24 00:03:00,114 --> 00:03:01,349 Well, I'm not sure 25 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,084 Ms. Marckham would agree with that description, Tattoo. 26 00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:05,986 She prefers to think of herself as a serious actress. 27 00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:09,890 You mean The Towering Disaster is a serious movie? 28 00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:11,725 Perhaps that's her problem, Tattoo. 29 00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:14,128 Ms. Marckham wants to change her image. 30 00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:16,330 Her fantasy is to give a performance 31 00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:18,766 that Shakespeare himself would have been proud of. 32 00:03:18,899 --> 00:03:21,402 In fact, she wishes to appear in one of William Shakespeare's 33 00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:23,671 original Globe Theater productions. 34 00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:26,707 My dear guests, 35 00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:30,778 I am Mr. Roarke, your host. Welcome to Fantasy Island. 36 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:40,321 [♪♪♪♪♪] 37 00:04:16,157 --> 00:04:17,825 MR. ROARKE: Mr. Durant, how did you happen 38 00:04:17,958 --> 00:04:19,626 to come across these pictures of Ms. Gentry? 39 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,595 ANDY: It was weird. I was in the public library 40 00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,064 checking out some sports magazines, 41 00:04:23,197 --> 00:04:24,598 when one of these fell off the shelf. 42 00:04:24,732 --> 00:04:26,200 I guess it had been misplaced. 43 00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:29,103 I leaned down to pick it up and there she was. 44 00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,872 You mean you fell in love with a photograph? 45 00:04:32,006 --> 00:04:34,042 Something clicked inside me when I saw her face. 46 00:04:34,175 --> 00:04:36,144 Something that said we belong together. 47 00:04:38,212 --> 00:04:41,682 But surely it would be far more practical to find a woman 48 00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:45,353 for whom you could care now, wouldn't it? 49 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,556 Mr. Roarke, I'm a track coach. Running is my specialty. 50 00:04:48,689 --> 00:04:50,358 Unfortunately, it's also my problem. 51 00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:53,361 I can handle hard work, sweat, any amount of physical pain. 52 00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:55,496 But emotional relationships 53 00:04:56,297 --> 00:04:57,965 scare the legs right out from under me. 54 00:04:58,299 --> 00:04:59,400 What makes you so sure 55 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,535 you're not going to run when you see Ms. Gentry? 56 00:05:03,037 --> 00:05:04,538 [PAGES RUSTLING] 57 00:05:05,039 --> 00:05:06,574 Because when I look at her picture, 58 00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:07,875 I feel confident. 59 00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,445 With her, I think I could be the kind of man I always wanted to be. 60 00:05:12,046 --> 00:05:14,548 That's why I want this fantasy, Mr. Roarke. How do I meet her? 61 00:05:15,916 --> 00:05:16,917 With this. 62 00:05:19,353 --> 00:05:20,454 This is blank. 63 00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:22,223 MR. ROARKE: Only for the moment, I assure you. 64 00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:25,393 When you have need, one side will help you find Ms. Gentry 65 00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,961 and the other side will introduce you to her. 66 00:05:28,096 --> 00:05:29,530 Well, if you say so. 67 00:05:30,031 --> 00:05:31,499 What happens now? 68 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:38,339 Your fantasy, Mr. Durant, 69 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:42,076 will begin when you light this candle. 70 00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:45,079 However, we're a bit early. 71 00:05:45,213 --> 00:05:47,681 And timing is crucial in these matters. 72 00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,717 Extremely crucial. 73 00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:53,454 Tattoo and I will be back in exactly 30 minutes. 74 00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:56,157 Relax until then, Mr. Durant. 75 00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,159 Relax. 76 00:05:58,292 --> 00:05:59,293 Tattoo. 77 00:06:03,764 --> 00:06:04,765 [SIGHS] 78 00:06:07,035 --> 00:06:08,469 Relax? How am I supposed to relax? 79 00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:26,887 [THUNDERCLAP] 80 00:06:34,195 --> 00:06:35,096 It changed color. 81 00:06:39,367 --> 00:06:40,701 What happened to the lights? 82 00:06:43,104 --> 00:06:44,238 What's going on in here? 83 00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:48,842 [SCREAMS] 84 00:06:51,345 --> 00:06:52,346 [SHRIEKING] 85 00:06:53,214 --> 00:06:54,215 Whoa! 86 00:07:01,022 --> 00:07:03,591 Wax. A wax dummy? 87 00:07:06,127 --> 00:07:07,128 Who's there? 88 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:53,874 [INHALING DEEPLY] 89 00:07:54,075 --> 00:07:56,110 As I'm sure you realize, Ms. Marckham, 90 00:07:56,244 --> 00:07:58,912 in Shakespeare's day, women performing on the stage... 91 00:07:59,047 --> 00:08:00,281 Well, it was simply unheard of. 92 00:08:00,414 --> 00:08:02,016 All parts were played by men. 93 00:08:02,383 --> 00:08:04,152 -You mean... -That's right, Tattoo. 94 00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:07,555 The first Juliet probably had t o shave before the performance. 95 00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:09,723 Mr. Roarke, 96 00:08:10,091 --> 00:08:12,826 I didn't get to where I am without certain initiative. 97 00:08:13,161 --> 00:08:16,064 I won't let anything stop me from fulfilling this fantasy. 98 00:08:17,198 --> 00:08:18,199 Now, 99 00:08:18,632 --> 00:08:21,835 if you really can send me back to Shakespeare's time, 100 00:08:22,403 --> 00:08:23,871 I'll take care of the rest. 101 00:08:25,073 --> 00:08:26,807 Very well, Ms. Marckham, as you wish. 102 00:08:27,108 --> 00:08:29,743 Will you have a seat please? Thank you. 103 00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:33,314 Now, if you'll close your eyes. 104 00:08:35,216 --> 00:08:38,419 Concentrate on 17th century England. 105 00:08:38,986 --> 00:08:40,488 The costumes, 106 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,790 the idiosyncrasies and customs 107 00:08:44,258 --> 00:08:46,994 of those days of long ago... 108 00:08:51,399 --> 00:08:53,234 Now, Master Shakespeare, 109 00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:55,903 we'll see about thy dallying with my wife. 110 00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:07,448 [GASPS] 111 00:09:08,682 --> 00:09:12,386 [STAMMERING] I was there. Why am I back here? 112 00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,655 How strange. 113 00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:18,192 Perhaps there' a counter-current in the time stream. 114 00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:21,362 Yes. Why don't you return to your bungalow 115 00:09:21,495 --> 00:09:23,097 while I work something out, Ms. Marckham? 116 00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:24,632 All right. 117 00:09:25,099 --> 00:09:26,934 But if you don't pull this off, Mr. Roarke, 118 00:09:27,068 --> 00:09:30,538 after all your promises, remember this: 119 00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:32,873 "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." 120 00:09:33,474 --> 00:09:34,808 That's not Shakespeare. 121 00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:37,445 No, it's Angela Marckham. 122 00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:46,687 Boss? 123 00:09:56,197 --> 00:09:57,198 [LOUD SNORING] 124 00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:04,072 Ana? 125 00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:06,740 Teresa? 126 00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:09,710 Florence? 127 00:10:13,047 --> 00:10:15,316 Who in the queen's name art thou, wench? 128 00:10:15,549 --> 00:10:16,750 Oh, no. 129 00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:26,127 [GASPING] 130 00:10:26,394 --> 00:10:28,029 Ms. Marckham, I believe I found the problem. 131 00:10:28,162 --> 00:10:29,963 So have I, and he's in my bed. 132 00:10:30,298 --> 00:10:32,300 TATTOO: Boss, is that who I think it is? 133 00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:34,568 In the flesh, my friend. 134 00:10:35,336 --> 00:10:37,771 Mr. Shakespeare, welcome to Fantasy Island. 135 00:10:38,072 --> 00:10:39,940 As I was about to explain to Ms. Marckham, 136 00:10:40,141 --> 00:10:42,343 apparently we tuned into Mr. Shakespeare 137 00:10:42,476 --> 00:10:44,545 at a time of a life and death crisis. 138 00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,014 The earl of Norfolk 139 00:10:46,380 --> 00:10:48,849 was about to run his sword through Mr. Shakespeare's chest. 140 00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:51,919 Well, naturally the bard's desire to escape was greater 141 00:10:52,053 --> 00:10:54,822 than your desire to go back. And since the connection 142 00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:57,058 was open at that precise moment... 143 00:10:57,191 --> 00:10:58,659 -SHAKESPEARE: Psst. -...presto, 144 00:10:59,127 --> 00:11:00,761 here he is. I assure you 145 00:11:01,029 --> 00:11:02,763 things like this don't happen very often. 146 00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:04,565 But since it has happened... 147 00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:06,900 Little Sirrah, this place here, 148 00:11:07,435 --> 00:11:09,970 -be it heaven or hell? -Neither. 149 00:11:10,704 --> 00:11:13,074 Like the boss said, you are on Fantasy Island. 150 00:11:14,075 --> 00:11:15,443 Be that perchance near Dover? 151 00:11:15,876 --> 00:11:17,311 MR. ROARKE: ...golden opportunity. 152 00:11:17,445 --> 00:11:18,879 Ms. Marckham, may I suggest 153 00:11:19,313 --> 00:11:20,481 perhaps you can persuade him 154 00:11:20,614 --> 00:11:22,783 to write a scene specifically for you. 155 00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:25,186 -Tattoo. -Yes, boss. 156 00:11:26,020 --> 00:11:27,188 Excuse me. 157 00:11:30,591 --> 00:11:31,825 Well, we... 158 00:11:33,194 --> 00:11:35,363 certainly could talk about it, couldn't we? 159 00:11:37,665 --> 00:11:39,533 Do you mind if I call you Bill? 160 00:11:40,501 --> 00:11:42,336 [VICTORIAN MUSIC PLAYS] 161 00:11:59,987 --> 00:12:01,355 Excuse me, Officer, I'm... 162 00:12:03,624 --> 00:12:04,892 Mr. Roarke? 163 00:12:05,126 --> 00:12:07,228 Am I glad to see you. Listen, I lit that candle, 164 00:12:07,361 --> 00:12:09,397 and I ended up in some weird wax museum. 165 00:12:09,530 --> 00:12:12,533 Yes. I warned you about the need for proper timing, 166 00:12:12,666 --> 00:12:15,769 didn't I, Mr. Durant? Had you waited 30 minutes, 167 00:12:16,037 --> 00:12:18,339 like you were supposed to, you would have ended up here. 168 00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:20,508 -Sorry, I couldn't help myself. -Mm-hmm. 169 00:12:20,641 --> 00:12:22,243 By the way, where exactly is here? 170 00:12:22,443 --> 00:12:24,512 London, England, the year 1893. 171 00:12:24,645 --> 00:12:26,714 Precisely where Ms. Gentry resided 172 00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:29,350 when she first began her career as an artist's model. 173 00:12:29,617 --> 00:12:32,086 Hey, terrific, Mr. Roarke. Terrific. Terrific. 174 00:12:33,087 --> 00:12:35,556 But that card you gave me to find her is still blank. 175 00:12:35,889 --> 00:12:37,225 I suggest you look again. 176 00:12:47,335 --> 00:12:49,270 Did you see the... Mr. Roarke? 177 00:12:53,341 --> 00:12:55,076 [WHISTLING] 178 00:12:57,678 --> 00:13:00,681 To be transported over the gulfs of time 179 00:13:01,115 --> 00:13:04,285 to a land where fantasies are come true. 180 00:13:04,752 --> 00:13:07,055 I mean, it's an age of marvels. 181 00:13:08,589 --> 00:13:09,623 Unbounded. 182 00:13:11,525 --> 00:13:12,526 And undraped. 183 00:13:14,128 --> 00:13:16,730 Oh, come now, you're not wasting your creative energy 184 00:13:16,864 --> 00:13:19,867 on the same old much ado about nothing. Get it? 185 00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:22,036 Ah, 'twould seem not. 186 00:13:23,171 --> 00:13:24,605 What a wonderful turn of phrase. 187 00:13:25,339 --> 00:13:28,142 Much ado about nothing. 188 00:13:28,609 --> 00:13:31,379 [CHUCKLES] I must need remember that. 189 00:13:33,047 --> 00:13:35,383 Um, tell me about this lord Norfolk. 190 00:13:35,883 --> 00:13:39,320 Bah, Norfolk. That less than senseless thing. 191 00:13:40,321 --> 00:13:41,489 Ooh! 192 00:13:41,622 --> 00:13:43,291 The sword at my heart 193 00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:46,460 was nigh onto making a rather nasty point. 194 00:13:46,694 --> 00:13:48,062 Why did he want to kill you? 195 00:13:48,329 --> 00:13:50,998 To curry favor with our noble Queen Elizabeth 196 00:13:51,132 --> 00:13:52,766 by skewering me alive. 197 00:13:53,134 --> 00:13:56,004 I thought, uh, she was a patron of the theater. 198 00:13:56,204 --> 00:13:58,006 Aye, 'tis true. 'Tis so. 199 00:13:58,372 --> 00:14:00,474 But... 'tis also true 200 00:14:00,941 --> 00:14:03,011 that I have written of her forebears 201 00:14:03,644 --> 00:14:05,746 in not the most flattering of phrase. 202 00:14:06,447 --> 00:14:09,483 She would not, I fear, shed many tears at my passing. 203 00:14:11,419 --> 00:14:14,422 There is also the matter of the earl's wife. 204 00:14:15,423 --> 00:14:19,127 An attractive and lustful woman. 205 00:14:22,663 --> 00:14:23,564 Um... 206 00:14:24,198 --> 00:14:27,601 Bill, could we get our minds back as to why we're both here? 207 00:14:27,935 --> 00:14:28,936 Mmm. 208 00:14:29,870 --> 00:14:31,205 Let's make a bargain. 209 00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:34,375 You write a special scene just for me, 210 00:14:35,276 --> 00:14:37,045 and I agree to keep you here, 211 00:14:37,178 --> 00:14:39,913 safe from the earl's sword, in my fantasy. 212 00:14:47,421 --> 00:14:48,589 Agreed? 213 00:14:51,325 --> 00:14:52,926 Agreed. [CHUCKLING] 214 00:14:54,395 --> 00:14:57,165 Thou be not unattractive thyself, dear lady. 215 00:14:57,565 --> 00:15:00,601 [CHUCKLES] Well, thank you. 216 00:15:03,904 --> 00:15:08,009 Now, um, about my scene, hmm? 217 00:15:09,410 --> 00:15:10,544 Aye. 218 00:15:23,991 --> 00:15:25,726 Where dost thou hide, lecher? 219 00:15:29,230 --> 00:15:32,833 Shakespeare, what demons have found league with 220 00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:34,168 to transport me here? 221 00:15:36,104 --> 00:15:38,339 Elizabeth shall be most interested to hear of this 222 00:15:38,472 --> 00:15:39,773 after I have run thee through. 223 00:15:41,975 --> 00:15:43,444 In the name of decency, wench, 224 00:15:44,645 --> 00:15:46,514 get thee some clothes on thy body. 225 00:15:48,516 --> 00:15:50,084 Shakespeare, where art thou? 226 00:15:50,284 --> 00:15:52,386 I shall get thee, thou peacock. 227 00:15:56,890 --> 00:15:57,991 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 228 00:15:58,126 --> 00:15:59,793 PAMELA: Come in. I'm just about ready. 229 00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:04,932 ANDY: It's her. 230 00:16:07,968 --> 00:16:10,171 -It's actually you. -Are you the driver? 231 00:16:10,871 --> 00:16:12,373 Driver? No. 232 00:16:13,441 --> 00:16:16,210 My name is Andy Durant. [STAMMERING] 233 00:16:18,412 --> 00:16:19,680 I have a card. 234 00:16:21,115 --> 00:16:22,116 Here. 235 00:16:25,086 --> 00:16:26,187 Oh. 236 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:28,256 A Mr. Roarke wrote to me about you. 237 00:16:28,389 --> 00:16:30,958 He said you were interested in helping me with my career. 238 00:16:31,859 --> 00:16:33,194 [CHUCKLES] 239 00:16:33,327 --> 00:16:35,629 I expected someone more mature. 240 00:16:36,164 --> 00:16:37,765 I really adore older men. 241 00:16:37,898 --> 00:16:40,201 They're so experienced and knowledgeable. 242 00:16:43,071 --> 00:16:44,172 Something wrong? 243 00:16:44,805 --> 00:16:47,241 Absolutely not. It's just that you're even 244 00:16:47,375 --> 00:16:49,577 more beautiful in person than in the magazines. 245 00:16:50,978 --> 00:16:52,413 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 246 00:16:52,713 --> 00:16:54,648 That must be Mr. Kragen's driver. 247 00:17:02,923 --> 00:17:04,258 Ms. Gentry? 248 00:17:05,459 --> 00:17:07,228 Mr. Kragen sent me to collect you. 249 00:17:08,962 --> 00:17:10,531 PAMELA: Just one moment, please. 250 00:17:12,433 --> 00:17:13,934 [WHISPERING] You can't go with him. 251 00:17:14,802 --> 00:17:18,372 Well, of course I can. He's taking me to an interview 252 00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:20,808 with Frederick Kragen, the famous sculptor. 253 00:17:21,042 --> 00:17:23,110 Mr. Kragen wants me to pose for him. 254 00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:24,845 Well, then I'm coming too. 255 00:17:25,612 --> 00:17:28,949 Mr. Kragen expects to see Ms. Gentry alone. 256 00:17:29,683 --> 00:17:34,355 [SIGHS] Mr. Durant is my new manager. 257 00:17:34,688 --> 00:17:37,358 -And he always accompanies me on my interviews. -Yeah. 258 00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:40,228 Haven't I seen you somewhere? 259 00:17:40,594 --> 00:17:43,397 No. No. I don't think so. I don't get around much. 260 00:17:43,531 --> 00:17:45,333 Not like I used to. Shall we go? 261 00:17:54,942 --> 00:17:57,745 SHAKESPEARE: Why did mistress Angela dispatch me here 262 00:17:57,878 --> 00:18:00,514 to view this... Whatever it be? 263 00:18:01,015 --> 00:18:02,316 It's a word processor. 264 00:18:03,317 --> 00:18:04,318 Look. 265 00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:06,220 You punch those key, 266 00:18:06,654 --> 00:18:08,756 and the letter appear right on the screen. 267 00:18:08,889 --> 00:18:10,158 And you're writing. 268 00:18:10,524 --> 00:18:11,759 Watch. 269 00:18:18,666 --> 00:18:22,103 Thou would process words as thou does process cheese? 270 00:18:22,570 --> 00:18:23,771 [SCOFFS] 271 00:18:23,904 --> 00:18:26,974 I cannot compose on this foul monstrosity. 272 00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:28,609 Aye, foul. 273 00:18:29,110 --> 00:18:31,912 It is foul indeed. Speaking whereof, 274 00:18:32,046 --> 00:18:34,715 hast thou any goose quill pens at hand perchance? 275 00:18:35,816 --> 00:18:37,051 Goose quill? 276 00:18:38,052 --> 00:18:40,788 Wait, I'll see what I can do. Come on, Bill. 277 00:18:44,492 --> 00:18:48,962 [SCOFFS] Alas, always a deadline. 278 00:19:13,254 --> 00:19:15,056 [TELEVISION PLAYING] 279 00:19:24,665 --> 00:19:26,334 [SIREN BLARING ON TV] 280 00:19:26,467 --> 00:19:27,468 Zounds! 281 00:20:01,435 --> 00:20:03,637 WOMAN: Are you in that renaissance fair over there? 282 00:20:03,771 --> 00:20:05,506 Mercifully, no. 283 00:20:06,974 --> 00:20:10,811 Tell me, my dear, how does one so fair and supple as thou art 284 00:20:10,944 --> 00:20:14,115 unescorted in this sensuous and tropical clime? 285 00:20:14,248 --> 00:20:16,484 Bill, what do you think you're doing? 286 00:20:16,617 --> 00:20:18,486 You're supposed to be writing my scene. 287 00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:20,154 -Yes. -Remember our bargain? 288 00:20:20,288 --> 00:20:21,622 Well, I do. 289 00:20:22,123 --> 00:20:25,559 Uh... Dear lady. Dear, dear Angela. 290 00:20:26,460 --> 00:20:27,461 Hmm. 291 00:20:28,329 --> 00:20:30,264 The truth be... 292 00:20:30,964 --> 00:20:34,102 that of late I have been beset by troubles. 293 00:20:35,003 --> 00:20:36,104 The truth is 294 00:20:37,271 --> 00:20:38,472 I cannot write. 295 00:20:39,407 --> 00:20:42,176 The words they cometh not. 296 00:20:42,476 --> 00:20:44,045 You mean you have writer's block? 297 00:20:44,445 --> 00:20:45,546 Mm-hmm. 298 00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:48,049 Oh, no, this is it. Mr. Roarke! 299 00:20:59,593 --> 00:21:01,429 PAMELA: So real, so life-like. 300 00:21:02,896 --> 00:21:04,732 Mr. Kragen is a true genius. 301 00:21:05,166 --> 00:21:06,400 Maybe so. 302 00:21:07,501 --> 00:21:09,903 But he's got a strange taste in subject matter, don't you think? 303 00:21:10,038 --> 00:21:12,206 Andy, be more respectful. Do you know what a job like this 304 00:21:12,340 --> 00:21:14,042 -could do for my career? -Mm-hmm. 305 00:21:15,676 --> 00:21:16,810 Mr. Kragen. 306 00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:26,654 [SIGHS] 307 00:21:34,295 --> 00:21:36,564 You're even lovelier than I dare to hope. 308 00:21:37,265 --> 00:21:39,900 Welcome to Kragen manner, Ms. Gentry. [SNAPS FINGER] 309 00:21:40,034 --> 00:21:41,569 Oh, I'm very honored, Mr. Kragen. 310 00:21:41,702 --> 00:21:43,304 Your work is exquisite. 311 00:21:43,437 --> 00:21:45,373 Mr. Kragen, I'm Ms. Gentry's manager. 312 00:21:46,507 --> 00:21:49,777 I don't bother with bookkeepers. You needn't have come. 313 00:21:49,910 --> 00:21:51,845 I'm very generous to my models. 314 00:21:52,346 --> 00:21:53,647 Let me give you a tour. 315 00:21:56,550 --> 00:21:58,052 What do you think of it? 316 00:21:58,686 --> 00:22:00,788 It's... It's chilling. 317 00:22:01,522 --> 00:22:04,025 It's terrifying. But beautiful. 318 00:22:04,792 --> 00:22:06,460 That look of madness in her eyes. 319 00:22:07,228 --> 00:22:09,397 -It's almost pitiful. -[KRAGEN SIGHS] 320 00:22:09,897 --> 00:22:11,032 You do understand. 321 00:22:12,100 --> 00:22:14,668 So many people see only ugliness. 322 00:22:15,936 --> 00:22:17,205 [GASPS] Jennifer! 323 00:22:22,443 --> 00:22:23,644 [GASPING] 324 00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:27,181 I'm sorry, but I know that girl. That's Jennifer Payton. 325 00:22:27,481 --> 00:22:28,849 A friend of mine. 326 00:22:29,183 --> 00:22:30,618 She was one of my best models. 327 00:22:31,952 --> 00:22:34,722 Although her beauty is nothing compared to yours. 328 00:22:37,925 --> 00:22:40,194 I think we've seen enough. And I think it's time 329 00:22:40,328 --> 00:22:42,230 to tell you that the fee for Ms. Gentry's services 330 00:22:42,363 --> 00:22:43,597 is 10,000 dollars. 331 00:22:43,964 --> 00:22:46,667 -Pounds. -A small sum for such beauty. 332 00:22:47,301 --> 00:22:51,339 But sadly, much too high for a poor artist like myself. 333 00:22:52,673 --> 00:22:55,176 -I'm sure we can negotiate. -Absolutely not. 334 00:22:55,309 --> 00:22:57,378 Thank you very much. You don't have to show us out. 335 00:23:02,883 --> 00:23:04,752 Have you changed your mind about her? 336 00:23:04,885 --> 00:23:06,220 Of course not. 337 00:23:07,088 --> 00:23:09,223 I merely want to be rid of that fool with her. 338 00:23:09,690 --> 00:23:10,991 Follow them discreetly. 339 00:23:11,692 --> 00:23:12,960 Wait until he leaves her, 340 00:23:13,094 --> 00:23:14,762 then bring Ms. Gentry back to me. 341 00:23:16,597 --> 00:23:18,632 [OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS] 342 00:23:24,505 --> 00:23:25,639 [DOOR CLOSES] 343 00:23:25,773 --> 00:23:28,142 You are such a beautiful imitation. 344 00:23:28,642 --> 00:23:31,645 How unfortunate I had to destroy the original. 345 00:23:41,389 --> 00:23:42,756 [GOOSE HONKING] 346 00:23:45,293 --> 00:23:47,295 Come back! Come back! 347 00:23:48,496 --> 00:23:49,663 Come back here! 348 00:23:50,731 --> 00:23:52,233 Come back, you silly goose. 349 00:23:52,366 --> 00:23:54,002 Tattoo. Tattoo! 350 00:23:56,504 --> 00:23:57,571 Yes, boss? 351 00:23:57,705 --> 00:23:59,773 May I ask you just what it is you're doing? 352 00:23:59,907 --> 00:24:02,543 Bill wanted a goose quill pen to write, 353 00:24:02,976 --> 00:24:04,545 -so I thought I'd-- -I see. 354 00:24:04,678 --> 00:24:07,481 Well, may I suggest you visit the Fantasy Island gift shop? 355 00:24:07,815 --> 00:24:10,651 I believe they carry goose quill pens as curiosities. 356 00:24:11,719 --> 00:24:13,587 -[GOOSE HONKING] -[GROANS] 357 00:24:17,025 --> 00:24:18,159 Okay, boss. 358 00:24:18,992 --> 00:24:21,429 Mr. Roarke? Mr. Roarke. 359 00:24:22,430 --> 00:24:24,032 You've got to do something. 360 00:24:24,798 --> 00:24:27,535 Your Mr. Shakespeare just told me he has writer's block. 361 00:24:27,668 --> 00:24:29,603 This whole fantasy is going up in flames. 362 00:24:29,737 --> 00:24:32,540 Indeed? Oh, I'm sorry, Ms. Marckham. 363 00:24:32,806 --> 00:24:36,310 I just wanted to prove I'm a good actress, that's all. 364 00:24:37,045 --> 00:24:40,648 You know I spent 15 years making other people believe it. 365 00:24:41,182 --> 00:24:43,084 All I want to do is prove it to myself, 366 00:24:43,651 --> 00:24:44,985 -you know? -Oh, I know. 367 00:24:45,186 --> 00:24:48,122 But I can't interfere in your fantasy, I'm sorry. 368 00:24:49,357 --> 00:24:51,159 -However... -However? 369 00:24:51,292 --> 00:24:54,028 However, I can tell you your fantasy will be successful, 370 00:24:54,462 --> 00:24:56,030 Ms. Marckham, provided you remember 371 00:24:56,164 --> 00:24:58,666 Mr. Shakespeare is a stranger in a strange land, 372 00:24:58,866 --> 00:25:01,969 and that you guard him against harm or accident at all times. 373 00:25:02,103 --> 00:25:04,305 You mean I have to baby-sit William Shakespeare? 374 00:25:04,438 --> 00:25:06,507 -I'm afraid so. -All he thinks about 375 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:07,975 is the member of the fair sex 376 00:25:08,109 --> 00:25:09,810 closest to him at any given moment. 377 00:25:10,411 --> 00:25:11,912 She makes a good point. 378 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:13,581 The point, Tattoo, 379 00:25:13,714 --> 00:25:16,150 is that if anything happens to Mr. William Shakespeare 380 00:25:16,350 --> 00:25:17,585 while he's here on Fantasy Island 381 00:25:17,718 --> 00:25:19,920 some of the greatest poetry and plays of all time 382 00:25:20,054 --> 00:25:21,089 may never be written. 383 00:25:21,222 --> 00:25:22,456 And you, Ms. Marckham, 384 00:25:22,590 --> 00:25:25,293 may never get to act your greatest role. 385 00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:34,902 SHAKESPEARE: [LAUGHS] Ah, my fair one, 386 00:25:35,169 --> 00:25:38,339 I would immortalize thee 387 00:25:38,606 --> 00:25:41,309 in some tender sonnet, 388 00:25:41,975 --> 00:25:45,279 which I shall write for thee... later. 389 00:25:45,613 --> 00:25:50,384 If you would be of mind to dally in some secluded bower. 390 00:25:50,518 --> 00:25:51,552 Aha! 391 00:25:52,420 --> 00:25:54,855 So the dog is up to his old alley tricks, is he? 392 00:25:55,589 --> 00:25:57,125 Damnation, Norfolk. 393 00:25:57,725 --> 00:25:59,193 How came thee here? 394 00:25:59,527 --> 00:26:01,929 Sorcery, as thou know full well. 395 00:26:02,663 --> 00:26:05,466 But I have vowed to make thee pay for thy trespasses, 396 00:26:05,599 --> 00:26:07,101 blaggard, and so I shall. 397 00:26:08,102 --> 00:26:10,771 No longer shall thy obscene writings 398 00:26:10,904 --> 00:26:14,308 and habits corrupt defenseless women such as my wife. 399 00:26:14,942 --> 00:26:16,910 My dear Norfolk, thou has read my words 400 00:26:17,045 --> 00:26:18,512 and yet seem uncorrupted. 401 00:26:18,979 --> 00:26:20,281 I am a strong character 402 00:26:20,414 --> 00:26:22,416 and can resist thy evil influences. 403 00:26:23,017 --> 00:26:26,020 And of more import, I am of the male gender. 404 00:26:27,921 --> 00:26:29,123 [HORN HONKING] 405 00:26:34,428 --> 00:26:36,664 What demonic creature is this? 406 00:26:40,301 --> 00:26:41,869 Have at thee, now! 407 00:26:47,975 --> 00:26:49,977 [LAUGHS] 'Tis slain. 408 00:26:51,312 --> 00:26:53,414 Now, 'tis thy turn. 409 00:26:58,586 --> 00:27:00,721 What, not yet dead? 410 00:27:01,422 --> 00:27:03,824 Thou has survived for the moment, blaggard, 411 00:27:03,957 --> 00:27:06,960 through the wizardry of these white-garmented sorcerers, 412 00:27:07,095 --> 00:27:08,262 but only for the moment. 413 00:27:08,862 --> 00:27:10,631 I shall seek thee out again. 414 00:27:15,703 --> 00:27:16,837 Bill, are you all right? 415 00:27:18,006 --> 00:27:18,939 Aye. 416 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:22,210 Thanks for thy timely intervention, Master Roarke. 417 00:27:22,976 --> 00:27:24,678 Perhaps I shall stay here on this island. 418 00:27:25,679 --> 00:27:26,947 Spend out all my days. 419 00:27:27,415 --> 00:27:29,650 Mr. Shakespeare, you don't seem to understand. 420 00:27:29,783 --> 00:27:31,619 When Ms. Marckham's fantasy ends tonight 421 00:27:31,752 --> 00:27:33,521 so will your stay on Fantasy Island. 422 00:27:33,654 --> 00:27:35,323 You will return to your own time. 423 00:27:35,789 --> 00:27:37,625 Oh, Master Roarke, I pray not. 424 00:27:38,326 --> 00:27:40,528 With Norfolk's persuasions, the queen will see my head 425 00:27:40,661 --> 00:27:42,496 taken from me. She has said as much. 426 00:27:43,197 --> 00:27:44,298 I'm sorry but I... 427 00:27:52,573 --> 00:27:54,842 PAMELA: Ten thousand pounds! Are you out of your mind? 428 00:27:54,975 --> 00:27:56,244 I am starving to death, 429 00:27:56,377 --> 00:27:57,978 and you lose me a chance to work! 430 00:27:58,112 --> 00:28:00,381 Look, Pamela, that was just a ploy to get you out of there. 431 00:28:00,514 --> 00:28:01,815 That guy Kragen is a weirdo. 432 00:28:01,949 --> 00:28:03,817 Weirdo? What's a weirdo? 433 00:28:04,752 --> 00:28:06,987 Never mind. The man is a genius. 434 00:28:07,121 --> 00:28:09,023 -He's a middle-aged creep. -He's elegant. 435 00:28:09,390 --> 00:28:11,092 All I ever get from young men like you 436 00:28:11,225 --> 00:28:15,029 are indecent propositions. Just, just get out of here! 437 00:28:15,396 --> 00:28:17,065 This is my fantasy. I'm not leaving. 438 00:28:17,865 --> 00:28:18,799 Fine. 439 00:28:20,801 --> 00:28:21,835 Mr. Durant, 440 00:28:22,670 --> 00:28:25,039 I am going to sit here and read the evening paper. 441 00:28:25,306 --> 00:28:27,241 If you are not out of here in two minutes, 442 00:28:27,375 --> 00:28:28,742 I'm calling a constable! 443 00:28:31,012 --> 00:28:33,447 Andy, look at this. 444 00:28:38,819 --> 00:28:40,521 "Miss Jennifer Payton of Wendon Lane 445 00:28:40,654 --> 00:28:42,290 has been missing for ten days. 446 00:28:42,423 --> 00:28:44,725 Police consider foul play a definite possibility." 447 00:28:44,925 --> 00:28:46,727 This is the girl we saw at Kragen's. 448 00:28:47,128 --> 00:28:49,463 That was her last job. She was so excited about it. 449 00:28:50,898 --> 00:28:52,000 Pamela, 450 00:28:52,700 --> 00:28:54,668 what do you know about Kragen anyway? 451 00:28:55,236 --> 00:28:57,838 [SIGHS] Well, nothing really. I mean, 452 00:28:58,439 --> 00:29:02,243 he's not an important artist yet, but definitely a genius. 453 00:29:03,277 --> 00:29:05,013 I'm just glad I got you out of there. 454 00:29:06,180 --> 00:29:07,148 Andy, 455 00:29:08,482 --> 00:29:09,850 suddenly I'm frightened. 456 00:29:10,384 --> 00:29:12,220 There's nothing to be afraid of now. 457 00:29:14,722 --> 00:29:18,059 Pamela, you're beautiful. 458 00:29:23,231 --> 00:29:24,565 [PAMELA GASPS] 459 00:29:26,234 --> 00:29:27,301 Andy! 460 00:29:32,373 --> 00:29:35,076 Where are you taking me? Andy! 461 00:29:40,748 --> 00:29:43,184 MR. ROARKE: Mr. Durant? Mr. Durant, are you all right? 462 00:29:43,617 --> 00:29:45,653 Somebody hit me from the rear. Why? 463 00:29:46,987 --> 00:29:48,956 Where did she go? She wouldn't leave like that... 464 00:29:49,457 --> 00:29:50,558 unless... 465 00:29:50,691 --> 00:29:53,394 Unless someone forced her to go? 466 00:29:54,362 --> 00:29:55,363 Yes. 467 00:29:55,863 --> 00:29:57,531 Kragen. It had to be him. Or that ape Otto. 468 00:29:57,665 --> 00:29:59,167 -Did you see anything? -No, I'm afraid not. 469 00:29:59,300 --> 00:30:02,403 I dropped by merely to see how your fantasy was progressing. 470 00:30:02,536 --> 00:30:04,838 I saw only you, unconscious on the floor. 471 00:30:04,972 --> 00:30:07,975 And this curious substance on the carpet by the door. 472 00:30:09,477 --> 00:30:12,246 Wax. Kragen sculpts statues out of this. 473 00:30:12,380 --> 00:30:13,614 This must've stuck to his shoe. 474 00:30:14,015 --> 00:30:15,316 He's kidnapped Pamela! 475 00:30:23,324 --> 00:30:24,392 To be 476 00:30:25,293 --> 00:30:28,662 or not... to be. 477 00:30:34,602 --> 00:30:36,104 That's a good question. 478 00:30:39,373 --> 00:30:42,310 Whether 'tis nobler in the mind... 479 00:30:44,878 --> 00:30:45,979 to suffer... 480 00:30:47,081 --> 00:30:49,083 the slings and arrows of... 481 00:30:50,851 --> 00:30:52,320 the earl of what's his. 482 00:30:54,855 --> 00:30:55,723 Or... 483 00:30:57,358 --> 00:30:58,692 to take arms... 484 00:31:00,228 --> 00:31:02,930 against a sea of troubles, 485 00:31:03,931 --> 00:31:05,833 and by opposing, 486 00:31:08,169 --> 00:31:09,270 end them. 487 00:31:14,508 --> 00:31:15,676 [LAUGHS] 488 00:31:16,444 --> 00:31:20,048 By gad that's good. I'm going to write that down. 489 00:31:25,686 --> 00:31:26,754 ANGELA: Bill? 490 00:31:30,924 --> 00:31:33,694 Pray enter, dear lady. [CHUCKLES] 491 00:31:33,961 --> 00:31:37,565 Uh, may I offer the bit of ale, though it be a mite thin? 492 00:31:37,698 --> 00:31:39,300 Uh, no thanks, I'll pass. 493 00:31:39,433 --> 00:31:42,770 Ah. Well, 'tis a stiffener to one's courage 494 00:31:43,304 --> 00:31:44,538 if nothing else. 495 00:31:45,239 --> 00:31:47,175 Then do something courageous. 496 00:31:48,176 --> 00:31:51,612 Dear madam, I am a lover, 497 00:31:52,146 --> 00:31:55,516 a poet and a scribe, and very little of a warrior. 498 00:31:55,816 --> 00:31:56,984 [LAUGHS] Alas. 499 00:31:57,118 --> 00:31:59,487 [SCOFFS] Would you put that down? 500 00:32:00,121 --> 00:32:02,456 If you don't care about the earl's sword 501 00:32:02,590 --> 00:32:05,626 carving you into London broil, I do. 502 00:32:06,827 --> 00:32:09,563 And to what does one owe this sudden concern, 503 00:32:09,697 --> 00:32:11,299 Mistress Angela? 504 00:32:12,033 --> 00:32:13,934 Until now all thou hast cared about 505 00:32:15,003 --> 00:32:17,138 has been thine own bloody self. 506 00:32:20,974 --> 00:32:24,245 You're right. That's all I cared about. 507 00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:29,617 Because I thought if I didn't, nobody else would. 508 00:32:31,252 --> 00:32:33,487 First, I had to get where I wanted to be. 509 00:32:34,122 --> 00:32:35,489 And then when I got there, 510 00:32:36,324 --> 00:32:38,826 I was terrified... that I wouldn't stay. 511 00:32:39,260 --> 00:32:44,132 Actors can be very selfish and self-involved. 512 00:32:44,698 --> 00:32:48,802 Well, I am somewhat of an actor myself, dear lady. 513 00:32:49,737 --> 00:32:51,639 I know of what thou speakest. 514 00:32:54,742 --> 00:32:57,711 What... What I'm trying to say is... 515 00:32:57,845 --> 00:32:58,812 Well? 516 00:32:59,780 --> 00:33:02,850 Well, my problem doesn't seem that large anymore. 517 00:33:03,217 --> 00:33:04,852 Not compared with yours. 518 00:33:05,086 --> 00:33:07,921 After all, it was my fantasy that got you into this mess, 519 00:33:08,389 --> 00:33:10,691 and I'd like to help you if I could. 520 00:33:19,833 --> 00:33:21,702 -"To be or not to be?" -Aye. 521 00:33:22,736 --> 00:33:24,372 'Tis something that just occurred to me 522 00:33:24,505 --> 00:33:26,474 on the spur of the moment. 523 00:33:28,109 --> 00:33:29,677 You just thought of it? 524 00:33:29,810 --> 00:33:31,045 Aye. 525 00:33:31,245 --> 00:33:33,947 Mayhap I'll use it in a play I've had in mind of late. 526 00:33:34,315 --> 00:33:36,817 -Hamlet, Prince of Norway. -Denmark? 527 00:33:38,819 --> 00:33:40,454 Aye, that could work. 528 00:33:41,422 --> 00:33:43,424 Hamlet, Prince of Denmark. 529 00:33:44,558 --> 00:33:46,927 Bill, don't you know what's happened? 530 00:33:48,262 --> 00:33:50,164 You've started writing again. 531 00:33:51,699 --> 00:33:55,469 Look, forget about that scene you were going to write for me. 532 00:33:56,304 --> 00:33:57,538 Perhaps... 533 00:33:58,372 --> 00:34:00,374 Perhaps you could write something 534 00:34:01,475 --> 00:34:04,512 to placate the earl. Uh... 535 00:34:05,613 --> 00:34:06,914 something pious. 536 00:34:08,516 --> 00:34:10,018 Something about the queen. 537 00:34:10,851 --> 00:34:11,952 [EXHALES] 538 00:34:12,086 --> 00:34:15,156 Inflate her ego. You know, butter her up. Uh... 539 00:34:15,856 --> 00:34:17,158 However you say it... 540 00:34:18,092 --> 00:34:19,460 [SNORING] 541 00:34:22,096 --> 00:34:24,465 Oh! Talk about outrageous fortune. 542 00:34:25,299 --> 00:34:26,634 [SNORING LOUDLY] 543 00:34:29,003 --> 00:34:30,138 Bill... 544 00:34:37,578 --> 00:34:39,047 PAMELA: I want to leave now. 545 00:34:39,680 --> 00:34:43,384 I offer you life ever-lasting, and you wish to leave? 546 00:34:45,386 --> 00:34:49,290 Why, you spiteful little wretch. I'm going to make you immortal! 547 00:34:50,958 --> 00:34:53,227 That's very nice, Mr. Kragen, but... 548 00:34:54,162 --> 00:34:56,664 I really don't think I want to pose for you. 549 00:34:57,098 --> 00:34:58,199 Pose? 550 00:34:58,666 --> 00:35:00,468 [LAUGHING MADLY] 551 00:35:02,403 --> 00:35:03,437 Otto! 552 00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:07,975 Lock her in. I must check the mixture. 553 00:35:08,342 --> 00:35:10,778 The eve of my greatest creation has begun! 554 00:35:12,046 --> 00:35:13,114 Otto, 555 00:35:13,881 --> 00:35:15,916 what did he mean his greatest creation? 556 00:35:17,585 --> 00:35:19,587 Why, you, of course. 557 00:35:22,056 --> 00:35:23,157 [DOOR CLOSES] 558 00:35:25,393 --> 00:35:27,595 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 559 00:35:35,903 --> 00:35:37,238 [TATTOO SPEAKING FRENCH] 560 00:35:48,616 --> 00:35:49,683 Little one, 561 00:35:50,118 --> 00:35:52,953 thou art with that poltroon Shakespeare this afternoon. 562 00:35:53,087 --> 00:35:55,056 Thou shalt take me to him forthwith. 563 00:35:55,823 --> 00:35:58,126 No speak the English. Vous parlez français? 564 00:36:03,264 --> 00:36:05,633 On the other hand, why don't you follow me? 565 00:36:15,043 --> 00:36:16,210 ANGELA: Tattoo! 566 00:36:16,344 --> 00:36:17,945 Tattoo, Shakespeare is writing again, 567 00:36:18,079 --> 00:36:20,014 but he's absolutely blitzed, and I can't wake him up. 568 00:36:20,148 --> 00:36:21,049 Could you... 569 00:36:22,316 --> 00:36:23,984 -Oh, no, not the earl. -Aye, the earl. 570 00:36:24,185 --> 00:36:26,420 Now, lead me to that scribbler Shakespeare, 571 00:36:27,021 --> 00:36:29,090 or I'll cut thy friend's heart out 572 00:36:29,223 --> 00:36:31,925 and serve it on a plate to the dogs of the kennel. 573 00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:33,894 Like, do it fast. 574 00:36:40,701 --> 00:36:41,735 [YAWNS] 575 00:36:44,438 --> 00:36:47,108 Prepare to die, thou drunken oaf. 576 00:36:47,508 --> 00:36:51,179 Oh! This is insane. My good lord, no. 577 00:36:51,445 --> 00:36:54,248 Uh, surely one of such noble birth 578 00:36:54,382 --> 00:36:57,418 shouldn't have to resort to base violence to settle a dispute. 579 00:36:58,019 --> 00:36:59,787 No? Why not? 580 00:37:00,854 --> 00:37:04,025 Thou art using 20th century logic on a 16th century man? 581 00:37:04,225 --> 00:37:05,926 In our time men were violent and proud of it. 582 00:37:06,060 --> 00:37:07,661 In your time men are violent and ashamed of it. 583 00:37:07,895 --> 00:37:09,630 -[NORFOLK GRUNTS] -What are you doing, buster? 584 00:37:09,997 --> 00:37:12,366 Listen, this is my bungalow. You put that thing down. 585 00:37:12,766 --> 00:37:13,967 If you want violence, 586 00:37:14,102 --> 00:37:15,669 you're going to have to settle for a video game. 587 00:37:15,803 --> 00:37:17,105 [HAND MIXER WHIRS] 588 00:37:17,605 --> 00:37:20,741 -Out of my way, wench. -Not another move, Norfolk, 589 00:37:21,175 --> 00:37:23,477 lest this formidable weapon render the 590 00:37:23,611 --> 00:37:24,878 into carnival confetti. 591 00:37:25,379 --> 00:37:27,548 [GRUNTING] 592 00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:33,954 [HAND MIXER TURNS OFF] 593 00:37:34,588 --> 00:37:35,489 Um... 594 00:37:37,091 --> 00:37:38,292 [SCREAMS] 595 00:37:51,772 --> 00:37:53,741 PAMELA: Oh, it's cold in here. 596 00:38:00,548 --> 00:38:02,216 Oh! Andy! 597 00:38:04,752 --> 00:38:06,120 Andy, are you all right? 598 00:38:06,254 --> 00:38:08,456 [WHISPERS] Otto's right outside Go behind me in a few minutes. 599 00:38:08,589 --> 00:38:10,024 I was so worried about you. 600 00:38:10,158 --> 00:38:11,825 It was just a little lump on the head. 601 00:38:12,093 --> 00:38:13,361 It's freezing in here. 602 00:38:13,494 --> 00:38:16,364 Well, I found some wood and managed to make a fire. 603 00:38:16,497 --> 00:38:18,866 I don't think this fireplace has been used for centuries. 604 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:20,801 Yeah, well, Kragen doesn't strike me as the type 605 00:38:20,934 --> 00:38:23,671 that likes to curl up in front of a fire with a good book. 606 00:38:24,305 --> 00:38:26,940 You know, you're right about Mr. Kragen. He is insane. 607 00:38:27,075 --> 00:38:28,576 He says he wants to make me immortal. 608 00:38:28,909 --> 00:38:31,812 Look, forget about him. We'll be out of here soon. 609 00:38:34,182 --> 00:38:38,352 It's strange, but I feel so safe with you. 610 00:38:49,263 --> 00:38:52,666 When I met you, when you first came to the door of my flat, 611 00:38:53,234 --> 00:38:55,769 I was feeling like such an awful failure. 612 00:38:56,770 --> 00:38:59,173 I thought that nobody in the world cared about me. 613 00:38:59,307 --> 00:39:00,474 I care. 614 00:39:02,076 --> 00:39:04,412 I have ever since I saw the first picture of you. 615 00:39:14,922 --> 00:39:16,190 [PAMELA SCREAMS] 616 00:39:25,433 --> 00:39:26,734 That's real bone. 617 00:39:31,939 --> 00:39:33,241 Kragen is no artist. 618 00:39:34,242 --> 00:39:36,710 He murders people and preserves their bodies in wax. 619 00:39:39,213 --> 00:39:40,648 Quite right, Mr. Durant. 620 00:39:41,282 --> 00:39:43,884 But you're very wrong in saying that I'm not an artist. 621 00:39:44,452 --> 00:39:47,221 Because of my talents you both are going to live forever. 622 00:39:47,955 --> 00:39:48,922 Otto. 623 00:39:57,698 --> 00:39:59,700 MR. ROARKE: Oh, I can protect Mr. Shakespeare 624 00:39:59,833 --> 00:40:01,769 while he's here on Fantasy Island, Ms. Marckham. 625 00:40:02,003 --> 00:40:04,538 But once he and the earl return to their own time, 626 00:40:05,006 --> 00:40:06,507 there is nothing I can do. 627 00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:08,676 Well, then we're going to have to convince the earl 628 00:40:08,809 --> 00:40:10,511 not to kill him. But how? 629 00:40:11,045 --> 00:40:13,947 Do I need to remind you that you are an actress? 630 00:40:14,248 --> 00:40:17,018 And what actress doesn't dream of doing Shakespeare? 631 00:40:17,718 --> 00:40:19,587 And of choosing her own role? 632 00:40:20,221 --> 00:40:21,555 Think about it, Ms. Marckham. 633 00:40:23,224 --> 00:40:24,292 Think about it. 634 00:40:32,033 --> 00:40:34,402 [LAUGHING AND CHATTING] 635 00:40:37,671 --> 00:40:38,906 Lend me thy sword. 636 00:40:42,310 --> 00:40:44,612 EARL: Defend thyself, now. 637 00:40:45,346 --> 00:40:49,317 Thou diest seducer, purveyor of obscenity. [GRUNTS] 638 00:40:49,850 --> 00:40:51,919 [CROWD CHEERING] 639 00:40:53,787 --> 00:40:56,024 That which is obscene lies in thy heart, Norfolk, 640 00:40:56,157 --> 00:40:57,591 not in my words. 641 00:40:57,991 --> 00:41:00,461 [SCOFFS] Repent thy precious words 642 00:41:00,594 --> 00:41:02,196 and mayhap I shall let thee live. 643 00:41:02,330 --> 00:41:05,233 Death cannot change that which is true and just. 644 00:41:05,733 --> 00:41:06,900 [GRUNTING] 645 00:41:08,402 --> 00:41:10,304 [CHEERING] 646 00:41:14,008 --> 00:41:17,045 Now, prepare to die, Master Shakespeare. 647 00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:20,714 [TRUMPETS PLAYING] 648 00:41:20,848 --> 00:41:22,816 CRIER: Make way for Her Majesty! 649 00:41:33,794 --> 00:41:36,297 Hast thou forgotten how to show respect 650 00:41:36,497 --> 00:41:38,732 to thy queen, lord Norfolk? 651 00:41:41,102 --> 00:41:42,736 Forgive me, my queen. 652 00:41:45,073 --> 00:41:47,241 I simply have never been graced with thy presence before, 653 00:41:47,375 --> 00:41:49,243 having seen thee but from afar. 654 00:41:49,377 --> 00:41:52,113 Tell me, my queen, how camest thou hither to this... 655 00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:54,015 strange land? 656 00:41:54,748 --> 00:41:57,985 Perchance to watch me skewer this dog Shakespeare? 657 00:41:58,219 --> 00:41:59,387 No, my lord. 658 00:42:00,621 --> 00:42:03,624 I come to command thee. Spare him. 659 00:42:04,292 --> 00:42:05,893 But, my Queen, why? 660 00:42:06,760 --> 00:42:08,096 Dost thou not know? 661 00:42:09,297 --> 00:42:11,865 The quality of mercy is not strained. 662 00:42:12,633 --> 00:42:15,736 It droppeth as a gentle rain from heaven; 663 00:42:15,869 --> 00:42:17,305 upon the place beneath. 664 00:42:18,172 --> 00:42:19,740 It is twice blest: 665 00:42:20,374 --> 00:42:23,077 It blesseth him that gives 666 00:42:24,345 --> 00:42:25,679 and him that takes. 667 00:42:26,947 --> 00:42:29,250 'Tis mightiest in the mightiest; 668 00:42:30,051 --> 00:42:36,290 it becomes the thronèd monarch better than his crown. 669 00:42:38,659 --> 00:42:42,363 Are thou truly mighty, Norfolk? 670 00:42:53,107 --> 00:42:54,375 I forgive thee, sir. 671 00:42:57,011 --> 00:42:59,613 My wife hath long vexed me thus. 672 00:43:00,214 --> 00:43:01,249 No, my lord, 673 00:43:02,650 --> 00:43:06,887 thy wife's dalliance lies more in mind than in the deed. 674 00:43:13,327 --> 00:43:15,063 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 675 00:43:16,030 --> 00:43:16,997 Well, 676 00:43:17,498 --> 00:43:18,899 that should take care of you 677 00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:21,235 for a couple hundred years or so, at least. 678 00:43:21,369 --> 00:43:24,238 Oh, my highest thanks, Lady Angela. 679 00:43:24,372 --> 00:43:26,007 Thou art truly a queen. 680 00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:27,575 In spirit! 681 00:43:27,908 --> 00:43:30,411 And most queenly as an actor. 682 00:43:31,312 --> 00:43:32,613 Did I really do well, Bill? 683 00:43:33,014 --> 00:43:35,183 Oh, thou were't wondrous. 684 00:43:35,716 --> 00:43:38,386 And thy words, so stirring, so flowing. 685 00:43:39,787 --> 00:43:41,589 Wouldst thou mind if I write them down 686 00:43:41,722 --> 00:43:42,923 and add to them? 687 00:43:43,124 --> 00:43:44,725 -To use them in a play? -Aye. 688 00:43:45,193 --> 00:43:47,328 -Would you? -Oh, thank thee. 689 00:43:47,461 --> 00:43:49,730 I'll call it "The Peddler of Venice." 690 00:43:50,398 --> 00:43:52,700 -"Merchant," Bill. Merchant. -Merchant? 691 00:43:54,102 --> 00:43:56,137 Aye, it has a certain ring to it. 692 00:43:56,337 --> 00:43:58,972 The Merchant of Venice. [CHUCKLES] 693 00:44:00,574 --> 00:44:01,975 Ah, well. 694 00:44:04,078 --> 00:44:07,781 Like as the waves make towards the pebbled shore, 695 00:44:09,517 --> 00:44:12,020 so do our minutes hasten to their end. 696 00:44:12,786 --> 00:44:15,123 I'll not forget thee, dearest Angela. 697 00:44:17,891 --> 00:44:21,529 In my play I shall call thee Portia. 698 00:44:23,997 --> 00:44:24,965 [SIGHS] 699 00:45:13,681 --> 00:45:16,584 [LAUGHS] This will be my greatest masterpiece. 700 00:45:17,051 --> 00:45:18,352 [LAUGHS] 701 00:45:18,586 --> 00:45:21,622 You see how simple and brilliant my technique is? 702 00:45:21,955 --> 00:45:23,824 You will be strapped into the chair 703 00:45:23,957 --> 00:45:26,027 and immersed into the boiling wax. 704 00:45:26,560 --> 00:45:29,363 Your friend Jennifer was much more cooperative than you. 705 00:45:29,663 --> 00:45:32,766 But your original beauty will ensure my masterpiece. 706 00:45:32,966 --> 00:45:35,936 [LAUGHS] Otto, bring them here. 707 00:45:41,975 --> 00:45:43,144 [OTTO GROANS] 708 00:45:46,814 --> 00:45:50,484 No hurry. You two will have all eternity together. 709 00:45:51,152 --> 00:45:52,253 Damn it. 710 00:45:55,489 --> 00:45:57,258 [GRUNTING] 711 00:46:05,433 --> 00:46:06,634 Andy, look out! 712 00:46:32,026 --> 00:46:34,128 Well, I don't know whether to say thanks or not, Mr. Roarke. 713 00:46:34,262 --> 00:46:36,464 My fantasy turned out a lot different than I expected, but... 714 00:46:37,031 --> 00:46:39,333 for the first time in my life, I got emotionally involved. 715 00:46:39,567 --> 00:46:42,170 If it hadn't been for you, Mr. Durant, Ms. Pamela Gentry 716 00:46:42,303 --> 00:46:44,738 would not have lived the long and happy life she did. 717 00:46:46,707 --> 00:46:48,176 -Goodbye, Mr. Roarke. -Goodbye, sir. 718 00:46:48,309 --> 00:46:49,543 -Tattoo. -Goodbye. 719 00:46:49,877 --> 00:46:51,145 And thanks. 720 00:47:04,325 --> 00:47:06,860 Well, Ms. Marckham, you came here, as I recall, 721 00:47:06,994 --> 00:47:08,962 to give a performance that Shakespeare himself 722 00:47:09,097 --> 00:47:11,465 would have been proud of, and you succeeded admirably. 723 00:47:11,865 --> 00:47:13,901 Oh, I did more than that, Mr. Roarke. 724 00:47:14,268 --> 00:47:15,669 For the first time in my life 725 00:47:15,803 --> 00:47:18,006 I gave without thought of getting something back. 726 00:47:18,306 --> 00:47:20,341 Indeed, that will make you a better actress 727 00:47:20,474 --> 00:47:22,410 than you ever dreamed, Ms. Marckham. 728 00:47:22,543 --> 00:47:23,577 I promise you. 729 00:47:23,977 --> 00:47:25,813 -Thank you, Mr. Roarke. -You're very welcome. 730 00:47:26,247 --> 00:47:27,815 -Tattoo. -Goodbye. 731 00:47:27,948 --> 00:47:28,882 Goodbye. 732 00:47:37,625 --> 00:47:41,429 Well, boss, it looks like our revels have now ended. 733 00:47:41,762 --> 00:47:43,131 Indeed, Tattoo. 734 00:47:43,864 --> 00:47:47,101 These our actors, as I foretold you, 735 00:47:47,501 --> 00:47:50,471 were all spirits and are melted into air, 736 00:47:50,971 --> 00:47:52,573 into thin air: 737 00:47:52,806 --> 00:47:55,743 And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, 738 00:47:55,943 --> 00:47:58,246 -the cloud-capp'd towers-- -Tattoo, Tattoo. 739 00:47:58,379 --> 00:48:00,381 All's well that ends well. 740 00:48:00,514 --> 00:48:02,183 Let's leave it at that, shall we? 741 00:48:11,592 --> 00:48:14,562 [♪♪♪♪♪] 53365

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