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1
00:00:02,379 --> 00:00:03,655
Okay, how do I look?
2
00:00:03,724 --> 00:00:06,620
Like a vision, an angel
descended from heaven...
3
00:00:06,689 --> 00:00:08,689
In short, meow!
4
00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:10,551
Whatever it is you want, no.
5
00:00:10,620 --> 00:00:12,517
I want nothing but
to wish you well
6
00:00:12,586 --> 00:00:14,551
on your other-realm
egghead retreat.
7
00:00:14,620 --> 00:00:16,827
You just want to get rid
of me so you can have
8
00:00:16,896 --> 00:00:18,551
one of your wild
bachelor weekends.
9
00:00:18,620 --> 00:00:19,896
Of all the times for hilda
10
00:00:19,965 --> 00:00:21,862
to be picking coffee
beans in Honduras.
11
00:00:21,931 --> 00:00:23,965
You Don'’t have to
worry about me partying.
12
00:00:24,034 --> 00:00:25,517
I'’ll be having a quiet weekend
13
00:00:25,586 --> 00:00:27,310
curled up with
memoirs of a geisha.
14
00:00:27,379 --> 00:00:28,310
I appreciate that.
15
00:00:28,379 --> 00:00:29,896
The last thing I want to do is
16
00:00:29,965 --> 00:00:32,448
stress out about you
while i'’m at genius-palooza.
17
00:00:32,517 --> 00:00:34,896
Hurry up and get out of here
so I can start missing you.
18
00:00:34,965 --> 00:00:36,241
[ Closet doorbell rings]
19
00:00:36,310 --> 00:00:37,413
Who could that be?
20
00:00:37,482 --> 00:00:39,137
I'’m not expecting anyone...
21
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:40,862
So soon.
22
00:00:40,931 --> 00:00:42,103
Mrs. Saberhagen?
23
00:00:42,172 --> 00:00:44,448
We'’ve got your order
here for 50 folding chairs
24
00:00:44,517 --> 00:00:46,724
deluxe fajita bar, three
gallons of guacamole
25
00:00:46,793 --> 00:00:47,896
and... one pinata.
26
00:00:47,965 --> 00:00:50,034
You must be having
one heck of a party.
27
00:00:50,103 --> 00:00:51,517
Fiesta!
28
00:00:51,586 --> 00:00:54,103
The fiesta'’s
over, gato stupido.
29
00:00:54,172 --> 00:00:56,379
Can'’t I at least
keep the pinata?
30
00:00:56,448 --> 00:00:57,551
You arethe pinata.
31
00:00:57,620 --> 00:00:59,586
[ Whimpering]
32
00:00:59,655 --> 00:01:02,758
You mean a
stomach full of candy?
33
00:01:02,827 --> 00:01:04,586
Oh Henry, show me the nougat!
34
00:01:09,965 --> 00:01:14,000
♪ Life'’s changing around me,
and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪
35
00:01:14,068 --> 00:01:20,517
♪ i'’m reaching out and
living by my rules... ♪
36
00:01:20,586 --> 00:01:23,689
♪ Time'’s moving way too fast ♪
37
00:01:23,758 --> 00:01:27,827
♪ I wanna make it last...
38
00:01:29,896 --> 00:01:33,344
♪ '’cause i'’m out
on my own now ♪
39
00:01:33,413 --> 00:01:38,000
♪ and I like the way it feels.
40
00:01:43,896 --> 00:01:45,310
And that brings us
41
00:01:45,379 --> 00:01:48,103
to the very crux
of existentialism.
42
00:01:48,172 --> 00:01:52,448
Now, can anyone... prove
to me that this chair exists?
43
00:01:52,517 --> 00:01:53,517
Ms. Spellman?
44
00:01:53,551 --> 00:01:54,482
According to descartes
45
00:01:54,551 --> 00:01:55,931
the fact that I
perceive the chair
46
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,360
and the fact that
I perceive myself
47
00:01:57,413 --> 00:01:58,493
based on the fact
that you perceive me...
48
00:01:58,517 --> 00:01:59,413
Anyone else?
49
00:01:59,482 --> 00:02:01,241
Mr. Goodman, prove to me
50
00:02:01,310 --> 00:02:02,862
that this chair exists.
51
00:02:02,931 --> 00:02:04,000
What chair?
52
00:02:04,068 --> 00:02:05,068
Brilliant.
53
00:02:05,137 --> 00:02:07,000
Class, take note
54
00:02:07,068 --> 00:02:09,896
of Mr. Goodman'’s
unconventional perspective
55
00:02:09,965 --> 00:02:11,896
on the so-called... obvious.
56
00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,068
Dismissed.
57
00:02:13,137 --> 00:02:15,758
Great, now the other kids
are going to beat me up.
58
00:02:15,827 --> 00:02:17,344
Miles, this isn'’t grade school.
59
00:02:17,413 --> 00:02:20,206
"Grade school"?
Try k through 12.
60
00:02:20,275 --> 00:02:21,206
Hey, Goodman...
61
00:02:21,275 --> 00:02:23,034
I think I can take the girl.
62
00:02:23,103 --> 00:02:24,103
I got your back.
63
00:02:24,172 --> 00:02:25,862
Great job in philosophy.
64
00:02:25,931 --> 00:02:27,758
"What chair?"... Brilliant.
65
00:02:27,827 --> 00:02:29,379
Oh, thanks.
66
00:02:29,448 --> 00:02:31,379
I wonder if it'’ll work
with, "what homework?"
67
00:02:31,448 --> 00:02:33,965
You know, technically, there
really was a chair in there.
68
00:02:34,896 --> 00:02:37,413
It was brown. You could see it.
69
00:02:37,482 --> 00:02:38,862
Forget it.
70
00:02:38,931 --> 00:02:41,068
We just wanted to say
that we'’re blown away
71
00:02:41,137 --> 00:02:43,482
by your intellect and
your whole take on life.
72
00:02:43,551 --> 00:02:46,344
You seem like the kind of
guy who'’s open to new ideas.
73
00:02:46,413 --> 00:02:47,586
Definitely. You should see
74
00:02:47,655 --> 00:02:49,965
the bizarre electronic
equipment he has in his room
75
00:02:50,034 --> 00:02:52,310
and he claims he can
communicate with... no one.
76
00:02:52,379 --> 00:02:55,034
Jason and I just joined a
group you might be interested in.
77
00:02:55,103 --> 00:02:57,620
It'’s dedicated to the
exploration of alternate realities
78
00:02:57,689 --> 00:02:59,551
and the search for
truth in the universe.
79
00:02:59,620 --> 00:03:01,413
Wow, sounds like
it'’s right up your alley.
80
00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,517
We have open meetings
every Friday night
81
00:03:03,586 --> 00:03:05,206
and we'’d love
it if you came by.
82
00:03:05,275 --> 00:03:06,275
No, thanks. I'’m not...
83
00:03:06,310 --> 00:03:07,241
He'’ll be there.
84
00:03:07,310 --> 00:03:09,034
Great. Bye.
85
00:03:09,103 --> 00:03:11,034
Since when are you my mother?
86
00:03:11,103 --> 00:03:12,310
I'’m not going to that group
87
00:03:12,379 --> 00:03:14,655
and i'’m not calling you
and dad when I get there.
88
00:03:14,724 --> 00:03:15,931
You know, you never go out.
89
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:17,620
Do you have any
social life at all?
90
00:03:17,689 --> 00:03:20,034
This is it. I'’m making eye
contact and everything.
91
00:03:20,103 --> 00:03:21,103
You'’re always talking
92
00:03:21,137 --> 00:03:23,310
about alternate realities
and junk like that.
93
00:03:23,379 --> 00:03:24,517
It puts most people to sleep
94
00:03:24,586 --> 00:03:25,965
but those two
think you'’re a god.
95
00:03:26,034 --> 00:03:29,310
I Don'’t feel real comfortable
around large groups of people.
96
00:03:29,379 --> 00:03:30,896
What do you consider
a large group?
97
00:03:30,965 --> 00:03:32,206
Anyone more than me.
98
00:03:32,275 --> 00:03:33,379
[ Doorbell rings]
99
00:03:33,448 --> 00:03:34,379
Come on in.
100
00:03:34,448 --> 00:03:36,310
Money'’s on the coffee table.
101
00:03:36,379 --> 00:03:38,344
Hello.
102
00:03:38,413 --> 00:03:40,344
Canton gardens.
103
00:03:40,413 --> 00:03:42,344
[ TV playing]
104
00:03:42,413 --> 00:03:44,655
I'’m stealing all
your furniture.
105
00:03:49,827 --> 00:03:51,103
Thank you...
106
00:03:51,172 --> 00:03:53,551
For the lousy tip.
107
00:03:53,620 --> 00:03:56,551
That idiot forgot
the fortune cookies.
108
00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:58,862
I did not forget
the fortune cookies!
109
00:04:01,068 --> 00:04:02,068
What did you say?
110
00:04:02,103 --> 00:04:03,586
Uh...
111
00:04:03,655 --> 00:04:05,827
Meow?
112
00:04:05,896 --> 00:04:07,206
Hey, maybe we
should invite miles
113
00:04:07,275 --> 00:04:08,482
to come to the movies with us.
114
00:04:08,551 --> 00:04:09,551
Do we have to?
115
00:04:09,586 --> 00:04:11,482
We'’re meeting
normal people tonight.
116
00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:13,103
What if I promise he won'’t use
117
00:04:13,172 --> 00:04:15,586
the words "roswell,"
"bigfoot" or "klingon"?
118
00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:19,172
We still have to deal with
his latest conspiracy theory...
119
00:04:19,241 --> 00:04:21,482
"the moon landing
was a total hoax."
120
00:04:21,551 --> 00:04:24,034
Look, I happen to know
there'’s a whole group of people
121
00:04:24,103 --> 00:04:26,172
that are very interested
in what miles thinks
122
00:04:26,241 --> 00:04:27,482
and not just psychiatrists.
123
00:04:34,517 --> 00:04:36,517
Miles: Come in, Sabrina.
124
00:04:36,586 --> 00:04:38,379
Thanks for the secret knock.
125
00:04:38,448 --> 00:04:41,758
Oh, no problem, and Don'’t
worry, I wasn'’t followed.
126
00:04:41,827 --> 00:04:42,931
New toy?
127
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,620
Been saving for this
baby since I was 15.
128
00:04:45,689 --> 00:04:47,517
This is the argonaut xr-9...
129
00:04:47,586 --> 00:04:49,758
Eight-inch parabolic
primary mirror
130
00:04:49,827 --> 00:04:51,620
800-millimeter focal length
131
00:04:51,689 --> 00:04:54,137
so powerful, pointing it at
the moon is like being there
132
00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:55,655
which is a lot
more than I can say
133
00:04:55,724 --> 00:04:56,758
for Mr. Neil Armstrong.
134
00:04:56,827 --> 00:04:58,137
Now, how about taking a break
135
00:04:58,206 --> 00:04:59,655
and coming with
us to the movies?
136
00:04:59,724 --> 00:05:00,724
No, thanks.
137
00:05:00,793 --> 00:05:01,827
I'’m staying in tonight.
138
00:05:01,896 --> 00:05:03,413
Miles, you can'’t
stay in everynight.
139
00:05:03,482 --> 00:05:06,068
How'’s everyone going to know
what a great guy you are if...
140
00:05:06,137 --> 00:05:08,482
Hey, can you point this thing
at the men'’s weight room?
141
00:05:08,551 --> 00:05:10,448
Ah, apparently you can.
142
00:05:10,517 --> 00:05:12,137
Hello...
143
00:05:12,206 --> 00:05:14,068
The truth is I was
thinking about going
144
00:05:14,137 --> 00:05:16,000
to that alternate
reality group tonight
145
00:05:16,068 --> 00:05:17,689
but... I feel weird going alone.
146
00:05:17,758 --> 00:05:19,344
Oh, well, roxie
and i'’ll go with you.
147
00:05:19,413 --> 00:05:21,793
Really? yeah. You know, we
can go to the movies anytime
148
00:05:21,862 --> 00:05:23,137
but how many times do you get
149
00:05:23,206 --> 00:05:24,413
to seek out universal truth?
150
00:05:24,482 --> 00:05:26,310
How are you going to
get roxie to come along?
151
00:05:26,379 --> 00:05:27,379
I'’m going to lie.
152
00:05:29,793 --> 00:05:31,068
Mmm...
153
00:05:31,137 --> 00:05:33,413
All you have to
do is talk for me
154
00:05:33,482 --> 00:05:35,586
and you get the chow mein, mmm?
155
00:05:35,655 --> 00:05:36,758
Mmm...
156
00:05:36,827 --> 00:05:37,758
Pork.
157
00:05:37,827 --> 00:05:39,275
[ Whimpering]: Oh...
158
00:05:39,344 --> 00:05:41,137
The other white meat.
159
00:05:41,206 --> 00:05:42,137
Fine!
160
00:05:42,206 --> 00:05:43,413
I'’m talking, see?!
161
00:05:43,482 --> 00:05:45,172
Now give me my chow mein.
162
00:05:45,241 --> 00:05:46,965
I knew I wasn'’t crazy.
163
00:05:47,034 --> 00:05:48,827
You area talking cat.
164
00:05:48,896 --> 00:05:51,137
You could make me
a very wealthy man.
165
00:05:51,206 --> 00:05:52,862
I could quit this stupid job
166
00:05:52,931 --> 00:05:54,689
and move back home to Tokyo.
167
00:05:54,758 --> 00:05:56,068
Hold the phone.
168
00:05:56,137 --> 00:05:59,448
Why'’s a Japanese guy
working in a Chinese restaurant?
169
00:05:59,517 --> 00:06:01,793
Why is a cat talking?
170
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:05,517
Oh, that'’s right...
To make me rich.
171
00:06:05,586 --> 00:06:07,344
You'’re coming with me.
172
00:06:07,413 --> 00:06:10,344
Oh, I knew I should'’ve
ordered pizza.
173
00:06:12,827 --> 00:06:14,862
This isn'’t a movie theater.
174
00:06:14,931 --> 00:06:16,103
You lied to me.
175
00:06:16,172 --> 00:06:18,103
All in the name of truth.
176
00:06:18,172 --> 00:06:19,586
Okay...
177
00:06:19,655 --> 00:06:20,586
I see the crab nebula.
178
00:06:20,655 --> 00:06:21,862
I'’m starting to feel at home.
179
00:06:21,931 --> 00:06:23,034
And i'’m ready to gohome.
180
00:06:23,103 --> 00:06:25,620
It looks like they'’re
showing a movie in there.
181
00:06:28,103 --> 00:06:29,931
Man: Human cells contain
182
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,586
the very same
primordial elements
183
00:06:32,655 --> 00:06:38,137
that compose all heavenly
bodies throughout the universe.
184
00:06:38,206 --> 00:06:41,034
We are children of the stars.
185
00:06:41,103 --> 00:06:43,620
Yes. I'’ve always
maintained that.
186
00:06:43,689 --> 00:06:47,103
Join me, Jim Tom,
on an epic journey
187
00:06:47,172 --> 00:06:52,931
to meet your mortal challenge
and discover your cosmic soul.
188
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,586
Or better yet, your
cosmic soul train.
189
00:06:55,655 --> 00:06:57,448
Anyone feel like dancing?
190
00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:59,448
Miles, I am so glad you made it.
191
00:06:59,517 --> 00:07:01,448
Hey, Catherine, how'’s it going?
192
00:07:01,517 --> 00:07:02,827
You remember Sabrina?
193
00:07:02,896 --> 00:07:04,931
Philosophy class...
Girl in the front row...
194
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,689
Sees chairs that
aren'’t really there.
195
00:07:06,758 --> 00:07:07,931
Doesn'’t ring a bell.
196
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:08,724
And this is...
197
00:07:08,793 --> 00:07:09,862
Ida.
198
00:07:09,931 --> 00:07:11,793
Ida rather be anywhere
else than here.
199
00:07:11,862 --> 00:07:13,551
What did you think of the video?
200
00:07:13,620 --> 00:07:17,068
I just caught the end, but it seemed
to completely parallel my world view.
201
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,827
Jim Tom is a brilliant thinker
202
00:07:18,896 --> 00:07:21,103
and we told him
how insightful you are.
203
00:07:21,172 --> 00:07:22,448
He was very impressed.
204
00:07:22,517 --> 00:07:23,206
With me?
205
00:07:23,275 --> 00:07:24,206
Oh, yes.
206
00:07:24,275 --> 00:07:26,689
Come and meet
some of the others.
207
00:07:26,758 --> 00:07:28,724
How perfect are they together?
208
00:07:28,793 --> 00:07:30,586
Roxie: It'’s like someone
took Ken and Barbie
209
00:07:30,655 --> 00:07:31,976
and dunked them
in the freak machine.
210
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:33,172
What'’s with you, roxie?
211
00:07:33,241 --> 00:07:35,201
I mean, maybe these
people aren'’t exactly like us
212
00:07:35,241 --> 00:07:36,601
but that doesn'’t
make them freaks.
213
00:07:36,655 --> 00:07:37,655
Man: Greetings.
214
00:07:37,689 --> 00:07:39,310
My Jim Tom crystal
was picking up
215
00:07:39,379 --> 00:07:41,000
powerful vibrations from you.
216
00:07:41,068 --> 00:07:42,793
Permission to touch your aura?
217
00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:44,482
Uh, let'’s just be friends.
218
00:07:44,551 --> 00:07:45,724
I'’m Sabrina and this is...
219
00:07:45,793 --> 00:07:47,713
Someone who was told
she was going to the movies.
220
00:07:47,758 --> 00:07:49,068
And you are?
221
00:07:49,137 --> 00:07:51,379
Name'’s Chuck, but
names aren'’t important here.
222
00:07:51,448 --> 00:07:52,896
What counts is on the inside.
223
00:07:54,689 --> 00:07:57,103
Don'’t worry, I have
pepper spray in my bag.
224
00:07:57,172 --> 00:07:59,482
So, what'’s the deal
with this Jim Tom guy?
225
00:07:59,551 --> 00:08:02,103
Does he have an uncle
in the pillow business?
226
00:08:02,172 --> 00:08:03,103
Oh, Jim Tom feels
227
00:08:03,172 --> 00:08:04,758
that the closer we are to earth
228
00:08:04,827 --> 00:08:07,103
them more freely we
can absorb its knowledge.
229
00:08:07,172 --> 00:08:08,655
Oh, so you learn
through your butt?
230
00:08:08,724 --> 00:08:09,724
[ Laughing]
231
00:08:09,758 --> 00:08:12,172
Yeah, Jim Tom appreciates humor.
232
00:08:12,241 --> 00:08:14,827
He'’s an open, nurturing man.
233
00:08:14,896 --> 00:08:17,103
All he asks is that
we-we maintain
234
00:08:17,172 --> 00:08:20,448
a respectful distance
from... His forbidden zone.
235
00:08:20,517 --> 00:08:21,448
Both: Excuse me?
236
00:08:21,517 --> 00:08:22,689
That.
237
00:08:22,758 --> 00:08:24,103
It'’s his inner space.
238
00:08:24,172 --> 00:08:26,137
It leads to a place of mystery
239
00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:27,827
a place of magic.
240
00:08:27,896 --> 00:08:29,068
I'’m ready for that movie.
241
00:08:29,137 --> 00:08:30,379
How about you? Absolutely.
242
00:08:33,344 --> 00:08:34,413
About time!
243
00:08:34,482 --> 00:08:35,793
Where were you?
244
00:08:35,862 --> 00:08:38,172
Leaving messages
for every talent agency
245
00:08:38,241 --> 00:08:39,862
from here to Hollywood sign.
246
00:08:39,931 --> 00:08:42,931
You are going to
make me filthy rich.
247
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,000
You'’ll headline in Vegas
248
00:08:45,068 --> 00:08:47,172
and have your own TV show
249
00:08:47,241 --> 00:08:50,689
where you dispense
justice with attitude!
250
00:08:50,758 --> 00:08:52,862
Your little moneymaking
scheme is over.
251
00:08:52,931 --> 00:08:54,793
At any moment,
my friends are going
252
00:08:54,862 --> 00:08:56,448
to crash through that curtain
253
00:08:56,517 --> 00:08:57,448
to rescue me.
254
00:08:57,517 --> 00:08:58,793
Just watch.
255
00:09:00,068 --> 00:09:02,379
I took a shot.
256
00:09:03,827 --> 00:09:04,758
Hey, rox.
257
00:09:04,827 --> 00:09:05,827
Hey, miles wasn'’t
258
00:09:05,896 --> 00:09:07,103
in philosophy today.
259
00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:08,275
Have you seen him?
260
00:09:08,344 --> 00:09:09,827
He came in after
you left for class
261
00:09:09,896 --> 00:09:12,103
changed clothes and headed
back to Jim Tom'’s house.
262
00:09:12,172 --> 00:09:13,931
He'’s been there
three days in a row.
263
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:16,103
That'’s what usually
happens when you join a cult.
264
00:09:16,172 --> 00:09:17,413
Roxie, it'’s not a cult.
265
00:09:17,482 --> 00:09:19,275
It'’s just a...
Group of lost souls
266
00:09:19,344 --> 00:09:21,413
who worship one guy
and Don'’t question
267
00:09:21,482 --> 00:09:22,862
anything he says.
268
00:09:22,931 --> 00:09:24,448
Maybe I should
go check on miles.
269
00:09:26,655 --> 00:09:28,482
Jim Tom changed my life.
270
00:09:28,551 --> 00:09:30,517
Before him [ Door closing]
271
00:09:30,586 --> 00:09:33,482
My life was about
material things...
272
00:09:33,551 --> 00:09:35,758
My helicopter, my winery...
273
00:09:35,827 --> 00:09:37,793
But I traded all that
274
00:09:37,862 --> 00:09:41,137
for Jim Tom'’s gift
of enlightenment.
275
00:09:46,275 --> 00:09:48,172
[ Chuckling]
276
00:09:51,793 --> 00:09:52,931
Oh, lordy.
277
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:53,896
Oh, brother.
278
00:09:53,965 --> 00:09:55,448
Miles, step away
from the little man
279
00:09:55,517 --> 00:09:56,448
and come with me.
280
00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:58,137
Hey, Sabrina, what
are you doing here?
281
00:09:58,206 --> 00:10:00,389
I'’m a little worried. I haven'’t
seen you in a few days.
282
00:10:00,413 --> 00:10:01,413
I'’m doing great.
283
00:10:01,482 --> 00:10:03,793
I'’m meeting wonderful,
intelligent people
284
00:10:03,862 --> 00:10:06,000
and i'’m learning so
much from Jim Tom.
285
00:10:06,068 --> 00:10:07,931
He has incredible powers.
286
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,241
Well, so did spiderman
287
00:10:09,310 --> 00:10:11,551
but he didn'’t ask people
to give up their helicopters.
288
00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:12,655
No, real stuff.
289
00:10:12,724 --> 00:10:14,620
He has the psychic ability
290
00:10:14,689 --> 00:10:17,344
to communicate with
plants and insects
291
00:10:17,413 --> 00:10:18,689
and also...
292
00:10:18,758 --> 00:10:21,689
Usually you have to
be a full-fledged traveler
293
00:10:21,758 --> 00:10:24,034
before you hear
this... He'’s a witch.
294
00:10:24,103 --> 00:10:25,103
A what?
295
00:10:25,137 --> 00:10:26,241
Tom: A witch.
296
00:10:26,310 --> 00:10:27,758
I Don'’t believe we'’ve met.
297
00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:29,137
This is Sabrina.
298
00:10:29,206 --> 00:10:30,965
Sabrina, i'’m Jim Tom.
299
00:10:31,034 --> 00:10:35,103
Glad to have you aboard
on this specialjourney.
300
00:10:38,827 --> 00:10:41,379
Welcome, traveler.
301
00:10:49,931 --> 00:10:52,172
Miles, do you really believe
that Jim Tom is a witch?
302
00:10:52,241 --> 00:10:55,034
I know it sounds weird, but i'’ve
seen the man do amazing things...
303
00:10:55,103 --> 00:10:57,379
Appear out of thin
air, make stuff vanish.
304
00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:59,000
Witches aren'’t
supposed to go around
305
00:10:59,068 --> 00:11:00,275
announcing they'’re witches.
306
00:11:00,344 --> 00:11:02,241
And you would know that... how?
307
00:11:02,310 --> 00:11:04,241
Well... if I was a witch
308
00:11:04,310 --> 00:11:06,103
you know, i-i... I would...
309
00:11:06,172 --> 00:11:08,379
I wouldn'’t be blabbing
it all over town.
310
00:11:09,862 --> 00:11:12,827
Look at that. Don'’t you
wish you could levitate?
311
00:11:12,896 --> 00:11:14,206
Interesting technique.
312
00:11:14,275 --> 00:11:16,000
Got to go.
313
00:11:20,344 --> 00:11:24,620
Then the hooker says,
"pi to the sixth quadrant."
314
00:11:24,689 --> 00:11:25,896
[ Cheering]
315
00:11:25,965 --> 00:11:27,586
Hi, aunt Zelda.
316
00:11:27,655 --> 00:11:28,965
Oh. Sabrina.
317
00:11:29,034 --> 00:11:31,517
Who would have guessed
that geniuses knew the wave?
318
00:11:31,586 --> 00:11:33,758
Oh, we eggheads
love to let it all hang out.
319
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:36,586
I wish you could have been
at Isaac Newton'’s last night.
320
00:11:36,655 --> 00:11:38,689
The things that man
can do with an apple.
321
00:11:38,758 --> 00:11:41,137
Anyway, aunt Zelda, I just
came by to ask you a question.
322
00:11:41,206 --> 00:11:43,034
Have you ever heard of
a guy named Jim Tom?
323
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:44,275
No. Who is he?
324
00:11:44,344 --> 00:11:46,551
He'’s the leader of a
cult that miles just joined.
325
00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:47,931
Why did miles join a cult?
326
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,068
I told him to.
327
00:11:49,137 --> 00:11:50,965
But that'’s beside the point.
328
00:11:51,034 --> 00:11:53,551
Anyway, Jim Tom is
claiming he'’s a witch.
329
00:11:53,620 --> 00:11:55,482
Ooh, i'’d hate to
think one of our own
330
00:11:55,551 --> 00:11:57,206
is using his powers for evil.
331
00:11:57,275 --> 00:11:59,137
[ Cheering]
332
00:11:59,206 --> 00:12:01,827
Well, is there any way for
me to tell if he'’s really a witch?
333
00:12:01,896 --> 00:12:03,827
Well, you'’ll have to
perform the knuckle test.
334
00:12:03,896 --> 00:12:05,620
Oh, of course, the knuckle test.
335
00:12:05,689 --> 00:12:07,137
What'’s the knuckle test?
336
00:12:07,206 --> 00:12:10,034
You steal a hair from
his left pinkie knuckle.
337
00:12:10,103 --> 00:12:12,344
If the hair curls,
he'’s not a witch.
338
00:12:12,413 --> 00:12:13,896
Is there any other way?
339
00:12:13,965 --> 00:12:15,724
Be thankful... when I was a girl
340
00:12:15,793 --> 00:12:17,689
you had to go in
through the nose.
341
00:12:17,758 --> 00:12:18,827
Ew!
342
00:12:18,896 --> 00:12:20,413
[ Cheering]
343
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,103
Oh, so this is the inner space.
344
00:12:24,172 --> 00:12:26,655
I guess the cult
business pays pretty well.
345
00:12:26,724 --> 00:12:29,862
I'’ll join you right after
I cleanse my soul.
346
00:12:29,931 --> 00:12:32,000
Time to be a fly on the wall.
347
00:12:32,068 --> 00:12:34,310
[ Buzzing]
348
00:12:38,965 --> 00:12:40,413
Must have garbage.
349
00:12:40,482 --> 00:12:42,379
No. Got to focus.
350
00:12:43,620 --> 00:12:45,517
[ Phone ringing]
351
00:12:47,586 --> 00:12:50,068
Yello. Jim Tom.
352
00:12:50,137 --> 00:12:52,034
Hey, Harry.
353
00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:54,344
Yeah, it'’s been a
veryfruitful week.
354
00:12:54,413 --> 00:12:56,103
Uh-huh.
355
00:12:56,172 --> 00:12:58,551
I have seen my early
retirement package
356
00:12:58,620 --> 00:13:00,689
and his name is miles Goodman.
357
00:13:00,758 --> 00:13:02,206
Okay, well, we
know he'’s a crook.
358
00:13:02,275 --> 00:13:03,793
Now let'’s find
out if he'’s a witch.
359
00:13:03,862 --> 00:13:05,655
Hey, how about you
and I taking a cruise
360
00:13:05,724 --> 00:13:07,586
down to The Bahamas
for a little r and r?
361
00:13:07,655 --> 00:13:08,931
Ow!
362
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,344
[ Buzzing]
363
00:13:11,413 --> 00:13:14,655
It'’s official...
He'’s not a witch.
364
00:13:14,724 --> 00:13:16,689
And he'’s got eczema.
365
00:13:17,827 --> 00:13:18,827
Uh-oh.
366
00:13:19,034 --> 00:13:20,034
Got to fly.
367
00:13:21,275 --> 00:13:23,620
Darn!
368
00:13:25,034 --> 00:13:26,965
Huh. Close call.
369
00:13:29,655 --> 00:13:32,931
Whoo! That would have
been a nightmare to shave.
370
00:13:34,413 --> 00:13:35,620
Oh, hi, Chuck.
371
00:13:35,689 --> 00:13:38,068
Sorry to rain on
your psychic parade
372
00:13:38,137 --> 00:13:39,310
but have you seen miles?
373
00:13:39,379 --> 00:13:41,896
He went home to get
something for Jim Tom.
374
00:13:41,965 --> 00:13:43,896
Well, what are
you people eating?
375
00:13:43,965 --> 00:13:45,448
Mung beans and rice.
376
00:13:45,517 --> 00:13:46,551
Woman: Jim Tom said
377
00:13:46,620 --> 00:13:47,965
that pure living starts
378
00:13:48,034 --> 00:13:49,793
with a strict vegetarian diet.
379
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,758
So he'’s a witch
anda nutritionist?
380
00:13:53,862 --> 00:13:55,103
All: Greetings, traveler!
381
00:13:55,172 --> 00:13:57,482
Oh, greetings...
Fellow travelers.
382
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,344
Sabrina, you'’re back.
383
00:14:00,413 --> 00:14:03,310
Yeah. Who could miss
"mung beans and rice" night?
384
00:14:03,379 --> 00:14:04,899
What are you doing
with your telescope?
385
00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,482
Sabrina, it'’s not my telescope
386
00:14:06,551 --> 00:14:08,172
any more than this is my planet
387
00:14:08,241 --> 00:14:09,965
or these are my hands.
388
00:14:10,034 --> 00:14:13,241
Jim Tom tells us possession
should not take over our lives.
389
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:17,758
The Jim Tom teachings. Chapter
seven, verse 12... travelers?
390
00:14:17,827 --> 00:14:20,241
All: "You'’ve got enough;
Give up your stuff."
391
00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:22,379
That'’s it? Those are
his pearls of wisdom?
392
00:14:22,448 --> 00:14:24,068
Look, miles, everyone...
393
00:14:24,137 --> 00:14:26,000
Okay, i'’ve got
something to tell you
394
00:14:26,068 --> 00:14:27,689
and i'’ll try to be delicate.
395
00:14:27,758 --> 00:14:29,758
Jim Tom is a big fat liar.
396
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,310
He'’s a fake, a phony, a con
397
00:14:31,379 --> 00:14:34,034
a cheater, a chiseler, a
bamboozler, a swindler...
398
00:14:34,103 --> 00:14:36,758
He'’s bunco,
bogus... Sabrina, stop.
399
00:14:36,827 --> 00:14:39,724
Jim Tom already warned us our
friends would say that about him.
400
00:14:39,793 --> 00:14:41,586
Because it'’s true... I
overheard him talking
401
00:14:41,655 --> 00:14:42,827
in his stupid inner space.
402
00:14:42,896 --> 00:14:44,655
Easy there... we
Don'’t go around
403
00:14:44,724 --> 00:14:46,413
insulting yourforbidden zone.
404
00:14:48,344 --> 00:14:50,551
Jim Tom is planning
to take all your money.
405
00:14:50,620 --> 00:14:51,896
That'’s ridiculous.
406
00:14:51,965 --> 00:14:54,655
All Jim Tom is trying to
do is give us a better life
407
00:14:54,724 --> 00:14:56,413
and lead us to true happiness.
408
00:14:56,482 --> 00:14:57,689
But you were happy before.
409
00:14:57,758 --> 00:14:59,931
Remember? You were so
excited to just look at the moon.
410
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,620
And then you told me to
get involved on thisplanet
411
00:15:02,689 --> 00:15:04,310
and now, for the
first time in my life
412
00:15:04,379 --> 00:15:06,448
I feel connected with
myself, with other people
413
00:15:06,517 --> 00:15:07,655
and with the universe.
414
00:15:07,724 --> 00:15:09,965
Sabrina, thanks
to you, I feel whole.
415
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:12,586
Yeah? Well... get over it.
416
00:15:15,068 --> 00:15:16,344
[ Knocking on door]
417
00:15:16,413 --> 00:15:17,758
Who is it?
418
00:15:17,827 --> 00:15:20,413
Delivery. Canton gardens.
419
00:15:24,655 --> 00:15:26,793
Hmm, food in one
hand; Cat in the other.
420
00:15:26,862 --> 00:15:28,000
You give me a discount
421
00:15:28,068 --> 00:15:30,241
or I report you to the
health department.
422
00:15:30,310 --> 00:15:32,344
This isn'’t just any cat.
423
00:15:32,413 --> 00:15:33,551
It'’s a talking cat.
424
00:15:33,620 --> 00:15:34,965
He'’s going to make me rich.
425
00:15:35,034 --> 00:15:36,137
Tell him, cat.
426
00:15:37,275 --> 00:15:38,689
I'’ll get my wallet.
427
00:15:44,172 --> 00:15:46,068
You really irritate me.
428
00:15:46,137 --> 00:15:47,862
You embarrass me, Simon.
429
00:15:47,931 --> 00:15:49,551
The name'’s Salem, you idiot.
430
00:15:49,620 --> 00:15:51,413
If you'’re going to
hold me hostage
431
00:15:51,482 --> 00:15:53,241
you could at least
show me some respect
432
00:15:53,310 --> 00:15:55,379
and call me by my real... meow.
433
00:15:55,448 --> 00:15:58,379
Meow. Aw, geez.
434
00:15:58,448 --> 00:16:00,103
This is a miracle.
435
00:16:00,172 --> 00:16:02,448
A divine sign from
a higher power.
436
00:16:02,517 --> 00:16:03,827
I must own it.
437
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:06,344
I'’m not for sale.
Make an offer.
438
00:16:06,413 --> 00:16:09,965
$10,000, and that
includes the takeout.
439
00:16:10,034 --> 00:16:11,551
Sold.
440
00:16:11,620 --> 00:16:12,862
[ Gasps]
441
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:14,793
Okay, Chuck, let'’s
go with your argument.
442
00:16:14,862 --> 00:16:17,000
Let'’s say that anyone
who levitates is a witch.
443
00:16:17,068 --> 00:16:18,482
Well, magicians levitate
444
00:16:18,551 --> 00:16:20,793
and David Copperfield
is a magician, ergo...
445
00:16:20,862 --> 00:16:22,310
David Copperfield is a witch!
446
00:16:22,379 --> 00:16:25,000
No! No, no, no.
447
00:16:25,068 --> 00:16:26,689
Okay, let'’s start again.
448
00:16:26,758 --> 00:16:28,862
Okay, if a person pulls
a rabbit out of a hat
449
00:16:28,931 --> 00:16:30,275
we call this person a...?
450
00:16:30,344 --> 00:16:32,241
A witch! No!
451
00:16:32,310 --> 00:16:35,793
Sabrina, I think it would be
a good idea if you left now.
452
00:16:35,862 --> 00:16:37,310
[ Sighs]
453
00:16:37,379 --> 00:16:39,517
[ Explosion]
454
00:16:39,586 --> 00:16:43,379
Fellow travelers, I have
a special treat for you.
455
00:16:43,448 --> 00:16:45,206
Tonight I have proof
456
00:16:45,275 --> 00:16:47,137
the mortal challenge
has been met.
457
00:16:47,206 --> 00:16:50,275
I present to you a
genuine cosmic soul
458
00:16:50,344 --> 00:16:52,862
an ancient, gifted prophet
who has chosen to visit us
459
00:16:52,931 --> 00:16:55,068
in a unique form.
460
00:16:55,137 --> 00:16:56,551
[ Travelers gasping]
461
00:16:56,620 --> 00:16:57,379
Salem?
462
00:16:57,448 --> 00:16:59,275
Stealthy messenger from beyond
463
00:16:59,344 --> 00:17:01,344
revered by witches and pharaohs
464
00:17:01,413 --> 00:17:04,517
please... share
with us your wisdom.
465
00:17:04,586 --> 00:17:07,000
Birds fly, dogs walk, but
this cat no longer talks.
466
00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:10,827
Anytime you'’re
ready, cosmic soul.
467
00:17:14,482 --> 00:17:18,137
Anytime now.
468
00:17:18,206 --> 00:17:20,275
Talk amongst yourselves.
469
00:17:21,586 --> 00:17:24,275
I think this little
charade proves my point.
470
00:17:24,344 --> 00:17:26,758
Of course the cat'’s
not going to speak.
471
00:17:26,827 --> 00:17:28,862
He'’s picking up on
your negative energy.
472
00:17:28,931 --> 00:17:31,965
A prophet can'’t reveal
himself to a nonbeliever.
473
00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:36,172
Okay, I didn'’t want to
have to resort to this. Look.
474
00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:38,001
Jim Tom: You backstabbing
little vermin eater.
475
00:17:38,068 --> 00:17:40,172
I shelled out ten grand for you.
476
00:17:40,241 --> 00:17:43,172
If I tell you to talk,
you had better talk.
477
00:17:43,241 --> 00:17:45,517
Those idiots aren'’t
going to keep falling
478
00:17:45,586 --> 00:17:47,103
for that levitation trick.
479
00:17:47,172 --> 00:17:48,310
Idiots?
480
00:17:48,379 --> 00:17:50,517
He can'’t be talking about us.
481
00:17:50,586 --> 00:17:52,344
Sure, I can string Chuck along.
482
00:17:52,413 --> 00:17:54,103
He'’s got oatmeal for brains.
483
00:17:54,172 --> 00:17:55,379
I'’ve got to find a new angle
484
00:17:55,448 --> 00:17:58,931
to keep the rest of
those losers sucked in.
485
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,310
Sabrina was right...
Jim Tom is a hoax.
486
00:18:02,379 --> 00:18:05,482
Look, his inner space,
it'’s not a spiritual haven...
487
00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:06,965
It'’s a bachelor pad.
488
00:18:07,034 --> 00:18:08,931
That'’s my mobile wet bar.
489
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,793
That'’s my faux tiger skin.
490
00:18:10,862 --> 00:18:12,517
That'’s my couch!
491
00:18:12,586 --> 00:18:15,448
He said he was going to
donate it to an orphanage.
492
00:18:15,517 --> 00:18:18,172
Which one, our
lady of Saint Hefner?
493
00:18:18,241 --> 00:18:20,862
Jim Tom also said we
had to become vegetarians.
494
00:18:20,931 --> 00:18:23,620
So why is he eating
Mongolian beef?
495
00:18:23,689 --> 00:18:25,034
Brother! We'’ve been had!
496
00:18:25,103 --> 00:18:27,793
This stinks!
497
00:18:27,862 --> 00:18:29,448
Are you okay?
498
00:18:29,517 --> 00:18:31,413
I can'’t believe I
got conned like this.
499
00:18:35,241 --> 00:18:38,310
[ Powerful wind whistling]
500
00:18:39,551 --> 00:18:41,758
How did you get in here?
501
00:18:41,827 --> 00:18:44,275
Well, if you were a
witch, you'’d know.
502
00:18:45,793 --> 00:18:48,586
And next time you'’re going
to impersonate one, please
503
00:18:48,655 --> 00:18:50,000
do something original.
504
00:18:50,068 --> 00:18:52,103
[ Roaring]
505
00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:57,620
Everybody'’s on to you.
506
00:18:57,689 --> 00:18:59,620
All your cosmic
travelers have left
507
00:18:59,689 --> 00:19:02,586
because they know what
kind of person you really are...
508
00:19:02,655 --> 00:19:04,379
A charlatan and a thief.
509
00:19:04,448 --> 00:19:06,724
You know, you and I could
make a lot of money together.
510
00:19:06,793 --> 00:19:08,137
Maybe I didn'’t
make myself clear.
511
00:19:08,206 --> 00:19:09,931
You'’re out of the cult
business, Jim Tom.
512
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,724
But I have no other skills.
513
00:19:11,793 --> 00:19:14,000
[ Thunder crashing]
514
00:19:14,068 --> 00:19:15,689
I'’ll get some.
515
00:19:21,137 --> 00:19:24,448
Tail of rat, wing of bat,
allow this cat to chit and chat.
516
00:19:24,517 --> 00:19:28,241
Oh! Sabrina, you saved my life!
517
00:19:28,310 --> 00:19:29,896
Jim Tom said he was going to do
518
00:19:29,965 --> 00:19:31,965
unspeakable things
to me if I didn'’t talk.
519
00:19:32,034 --> 00:19:34,896
[ Sobbing]: He... he...
520
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:37,793
[ Stops sobbing]: He
took the Mongolian beef!
521
00:19:39,758 --> 00:19:41,517
Hey.
522
00:19:41,586 --> 00:19:43,000
Hey, miles.
523
00:19:43,068 --> 00:19:44,896
Oh, you got back my telescope.
524
00:19:44,965 --> 00:19:47,275
Thanks, Sabrina. No problem.
525
00:19:47,344 --> 00:19:49,551
I'’m sorry I pushed you to
get involved with Jim Tom.
526
00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:51,275
You didn'’t force
me to join that group.
527
00:19:51,344 --> 00:19:52,758
And it wasn'’t all bad.
528
00:19:52,827 --> 00:19:55,448
I might have temporarily
lost my mind, but...
529
00:19:55,517 --> 00:19:57,000
I gained a few friends.
530
00:19:57,068 --> 00:19:57,827
Really?
531
00:19:57,896 --> 00:19:59,551
Yeah. After we left Jim Tom'’s
532
00:19:59,620 --> 00:20:02,551
all the ex-travelers went
out for chicken and waffles.
533
00:20:02,620 --> 00:20:04,689
Well, at least it'’s
better than mung beans.
534
00:20:04,758 --> 00:20:07,551
Sabrina, i'’ve got to tell you,
the way you went in there
535
00:20:07,620 --> 00:20:10,310
and put yourself on the
line for me was... incredible.
536
00:20:11,724 --> 00:20:12,931
You'’re a really good friend.
537
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,413
Thanks, miles.
538
00:20:14,482 --> 00:20:17,034
And if you ever get
involved with people
539
00:20:17,103 --> 00:20:19,310
who claim to be
from another realm
540
00:20:19,379 --> 00:20:21,724
i'’ll be the first to bust
the thing wide open.
541
00:20:21,793 --> 00:20:24,862
Hopefully, you won'’t have
to go in through the nose.
542
00:20:24,931 --> 00:20:27,620
Private joke.
543
00:20:34,965 --> 00:20:36,172
Zelda: I'’m back.
544
00:20:36,241 --> 00:20:38,103
Oh! Please Don'’t tell
Zelda what happened.
545
00:20:38,172 --> 00:20:39,652
She'’ll never let
me stay alone again.
546
00:20:39,689 --> 00:20:41,827
She'’ll make you stay with
me... My lips are sealed.
547
00:20:41,896 --> 00:20:45,034
Hey. So how was the
rest of genius camp?
548
00:20:45,103 --> 00:20:47,586
Well... Da Vinci was a dream
549
00:20:47,655 --> 00:20:48,931
kierkegaard was a lech
550
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,241
and Einstein
short-sheeted my bed.
551
00:20:52,310 --> 00:20:54,000
How was your weekend, Salem?
552
00:20:54,068 --> 00:20:56,620
Very quiet, nothing
out of the ordinary.
553
00:20:56,689 --> 00:20:58,172
Right, Sabrina? Right.
554
00:20:58,241 --> 00:21:00,344
[ Doorbell rings]Pizza
guy. I'’ll get the money.
555
00:21:00,413 --> 00:21:02,310
Oh. I'’ll get the door.
556
00:21:07,172 --> 00:21:08,689
That'’ll be $18.50.
557
00:21:08,758 --> 00:21:10,310
Just put it right over there.
558
00:21:13,655 --> 00:21:14,413
[ Growls]
559
00:21:14,482 --> 00:21:19,000
You!
560
00:21:19,068 --> 00:21:21,379
No charge.
39982
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