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1
00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:03,060
(bell ringing)
2
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:04,370
♪ When I wake up
in the morning ♪
3
00:00:04,370 --> 00:00:05,870
♪ And the alarm
gets out a warning ♪
4
00:00:05,870 --> 00:00:08,900
♪ I don't think I'll
ever make it on time ♪
5
00:00:08,910 --> 00:00:10,410
♪ By the time I grab my books ♪
6
00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:11,970
♪ And I give myself a look ♪
7
00:00:11,980 --> 00:00:15,410
♪ I'm at the corner just in
time to see the bus fly by ♪
8
00:00:15,410 --> 00:00:20,420
♪ It's all right 'cause
I'm saved by the bell ♪
9
00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:22,580
♪ If the teacher pops a test ♪
10
00:00:22,590 --> 00:00:24,150
♪ I know I'll never pass ♪
11
00:00:24,150 --> 00:00:27,260
♪ And my dog ate all my
homework last night ♪
12
00:00:27,260 --> 00:00:30,060
♪ Riding low in my chair ♪ She
won't know that I'm there ♪
13
00:00:30,060 --> 00:00:33,760
♪ If I can hand it in
tomorrow it'll be all right ♪
14
00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:38,730
♪ It's all right 'cause
I'm saved by the bell ♪
15
00:00:52,150 --> 00:00:55,080
♪ It's all right 'cause
I'm saved by the ♪
16
00:00:55,090 --> 00:00:58,290
♪ It's all the right
'cause I'm saved by the ♪
17
00:00:58,290 --> 00:01:03,120
♪ It's all right 'cause
I'm saved by the bell ♪
18
00:01:06,230 --> 00:01:08,800
(upbeat music)
19
00:01:17,170 --> 00:01:18,440
- All right, Lisa.
20
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,310
Let's practice for
the academic bowl.
21
00:01:20,310 --> 00:01:21,540
First question.
22
00:01:21,550 --> 00:01:23,640
What's the zip code
of northern Zimbabwe?
23
00:01:24,850 --> 00:01:25,680
- 90210?
24
00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:29,280
- (imitates buzzer)
Wrong answer.
25
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:31,320
That would be Zimbabwe Hills.
26
00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:33,190
- What kind of a stupid
question is that?
27
00:01:33,190 --> 00:01:34,760
- Lisa, you've gotta
know everything.
28
00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:37,160
This is the academic bowl,
not Wheel of Fortune.
29
00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:42,330
- Hey, guys, guess where Slater
and I are going on Friday?
30
00:01:42,330 --> 00:01:43,600
Give you a hint.
31
00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:44,900
It's big and white, and
you need a lift ticket
32
00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,470
to get to the top.
33
00:01:46,470 --> 00:01:49,600
- The Matterhorn at Disneyland?
34
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:52,170
- No, doofus, we're going
skiing at Big Bear Mountain.
35
00:01:52,180 --> 00:01:53,440
- Yeah.
- It's winter break,
36
00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:55,110
and the slopes will be
packed with ski bunnies.
37
00:01:55,110 --> 00:01:57,610
- Ouch.
- Wow, bunnies and bears.
38
00:01:57,610 --> 00:01:58,410
Can I go?
39
00:01:59,850 --> 00:02:00,720
- Take him, Zack.
40
00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:02,120
Maybe he'll get eaten by a bear.
41
00:02:03,150 --> 00:02:04,750
- Hey, Screech, carry my skis.
42
00:02:05,890 --> 00:02:07,320
- Hey, wait a minute.
43
00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:08,920
How are you guys gonna cut
school without Belding knowing?
44
00:02:08,930 --> 00:02:12,290
- Lisa, you are
talking to Zack Morris.
45
00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:14,300
Getting out of school
is my middle name.
46
00:02:15,700 --> 00:02:18,270
- How are we gettin'
out of school?
47
00:02:18,270 --> 00:02:19,130
- I have no idea.
48
00:02:20,900 --> 00:02:22,440
- Here you go, Screech.
49
00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:25,910
Orange juice, extra
pulp, oatmeal lumpy,
50
00:02:25,910 --> 00:02:27,480
and scrambled eggs, runny.
51
00:02:28,810 --> 00:02:31,350
- Hey, you forgot
my burnt toast.
52
00:02:31,350 --> 00:02:33,150
- Don't push it, little man.
53
00:02:33,150 --> 00:02:35,220
Can I get you guys something?
- Yes, another waitress.
54
00:02:35,220 --> 00:02:36,150
You're rude!
55
00:02:39,060 --> 00:02:40,050
- So how do you like
filling in for Kelly
56
00:02:40,060 --> 00:02:41,560
while she's away?
57
00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:44,130
- Well, I hate wearing this
demeaning, sexist uniform,
58
00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:45,960
but the tips are great.
59
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:47,200
- Jessie, how are
you gonna practice
60
00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,030
for the academic
bowl and still work?
61
00:02:49,030 --> 00:02:49,830
- Are you kidding?
62
00:02:49,830 --> 00:02:51,330
Ask me anything.
63
00:02:51,330 --> 00:02:55,470
- Okay, smarty, what's the
zip code of northern Zimbabwe?
64
00:02:55,470 --> 00:02:57,770
- Easy, KR137X.
65
00:02:57,770 --> 00:02:59,570
I've got toast burning, bye.
66
00:03:01,780 --> 00:03:04,110
- Smart chick, lousy attitude.
67
00:03:04,110 --> 00:03:05,150
- Wish she had the
answer for getting
68
00:03:05,150 --> 00:03:07,050
out of school on Friday.
69
00:03:07,050 --> 00:03:09,380
- Too bad the teacher's contract
talks are going so well.
70
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,990
If there's a strike, we won't
be able to go to school.
71
00:03:13,790 --> 00:03:16,760
- Sometimes the biggest
dorks have the best ideas.
72
00:03:19,230 --> 00:03:22,060
- Mr. Tuttle, all these
demands seem reasonable.
73
00:03:22,070 --> 00:03:27,070
Salary hike, better hours,
larger lunch portions.
74
00:03:28,510 --> 00:03:31,210
- Well, that would be a
personal favor, of course.
75
00:03:31,210 --> 00:03:32,470
- Of course.
76
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:34,680
Now, Mr. Tuttle, I want
you to spread the word.
77
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,610
Nick Belding is on
the teacher's team.
78
00:03:36,610 --> 00:03:38,110
He doesn't want a strike.
79
00:03:38,110 --> 00:03:41,650
Solidarity, brother.
- Solidarity, brother.
80
00:03:41,650 --> 00:03:42,620
- All right.
81
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:50,890
- Hey, ready for your interview
for the school paper, Mr. B?
82
00:03:50,890 --> 00:03:52,090
- Interview?
- Yes,
83
00:03:52,100 --> 00:03:53,390
don't you remember, sir?
84
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,000
Every year before
the academic bowl,
85
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:57,000
you provide a few
inspirational comments
86
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:58,230
for the school paper.
87
00:03:58,240 --> 00:03:59,670
- Well, sure.
88
00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:01,370
- And we'll turn those comments
into a teacher's strike.
89
00:04:02,670 --> 00:04:04,310
- What was that?
- Just a sound check.
90
00:04:04,310 --> 00:04:05,770
- Sounds good, Zack.
- Okay.
91
00:04:06,940 --> 00:04:10,310
Now, Mr. Belding,
Bayside's academic team
92
00:04:10,310 --> 00:04:11,980
is winless in bowl competitions.
93
00:04:11,980 --> 00:04:14,420
Does this losing
tradition concern you?
94
00:04:16,250 --> 00:04:17,450
- Heck no.
95
00:04:20,020 --> 00:04:23,420
- Sir, we need a little
more inspiration.
96
00:04:25,230 --> 00:04:27,060
- We are going to crush them.
97
00:04:27,060 --> 00:04:30,630
Spineless jellyfish never
put up much of a fight.
98
00:04:30,630 --> 00:04:32,870
How's that?
- Perfect, Mr. B.
99
00:04:32,870 --> 00:04:35,340
- Just one more thing,
Valley's principal
100
00:04:35,340 --> 00:04:36,570
says you're over the hill.
101
00:04:36,570 --> 00:04:38,510
Now, what do you
think about that?
102
00:04:38,510 --> 00:04:40,140
- That incompetent bozo.
103
00:04:40,140 --> 00:04:43,010
He should've been
fired years ago.
104
00:04:43,010 --> 00:04:44,550
- Did you get all that, Slater?
105
00:04:44,550 --> 00:04:45,850
- Every last word.
106
00:04:48,150 --> 00:04:49,620
- Remember, people.
107
00:04:49,620 --> 00:04:53,490
Be confident, be quick, and
most of all, be correct.
108
00:04:53,490 --> 00:04:54,820
Ready?
- Ready!
109
00:04:54,820 --> 00:04:56,290
- Okay.
110
00:04:56,290 --> 00:04:58,890
Name the city that was
once called New Amsterdam.
111
00:04:58,900 --> 00:05:00,460
(buzzer buzzing)
- New York.
112
00:05:00,460 --> 00:05:01,730
- Correct.
113
00:05:01,730 --> 00:05:04,470
Captain John Smith was
said to have been saved
114
00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:05,470
by what--
(buzzer buzzing)
115
00:05:05,470 --> 00:05:06,730
- Pocahontas.
116
00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:09,040
- Correct.
117
00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,210
Who was the first
person to walk--
118
00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:14,070
(buzzer buzzing)
- Neil Armstrong.
119
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:15,380
- On the moon?
120
00:05:15,380 --> 00:05:16,980
Correct again.
121
00:05:16,980 --> 00:05:17,980
Okay, next question.
122
00:05:20,150 --> 00:05:22,150
- Mr. Tuttle, we are
on the team, too.
123
00:05:22,150 --> 00:05:24,890
Screech keeps buzzing in
before we hear the question.
124
00:05:24,890 --> 00:05:26,050
- Yeah!
125
00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:27,360
How are we supposed to practice?
126
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:29,860
- Now, girls, quit complaining.
127
00:05:29,860 --> 00:05:32,530
Screech is exactly the
kind of crafty genius
128
00:05:32,530 --> 00:05:33,830
you'll be up against.
- Yeah,
129
00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:35,230
don't bruise the genius.
130
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:37,900
- Excuse me, Mr. Tuttle.
131
00:05:37,900 --> 00:05:39,530
Can we get an update on
the teacher's contract
132
00:05:39,540 --> 00:05:41,400
for the school paper?
- Absolutely.
133
00:05:42,270 --> 00:05:44,170
Okay, bowlers, brain break.
134
00:05:44,170 --> 00:05:45,410
- Fine.
135
00:05:45,410 --> 00:05:47,170
This gives us a chance
to discuss our strategy
136
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:51,950
with our genius caption.
- Yeah, come with us, Captain.
137
00:05:51,950 --> 00:05:52,780
- Yikes.
138
00:05:56,950 --> 00:05:58,320
- Okay, it'll just be
a second, Mr. Tuttle.
139
00:05:58,320 --> 00:05:59,490
I have to cue the tape.
140
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,020
- [Zack] Mr. Belding,
are you concerned
141
00:06:02,020 --> 00:06:04,060
about the threat of
a teacher's strike?
142
00:06:04,060 --> 00:06:05,060
- [Mr. Belding] Heck no.
143
00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:06,960
We're going to crush them.
144
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:09,630
Spineless jellyfish never
put up much of a fight.
145
00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:11,670
- What?
- Oh, sorry about that, sir.
146
00:06:11,670 --> 00:06:13,800
That was just a previous
interview with Mr. Belding.
147
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:16,200
I'll fast forward it to--
- No, no, no, no.
148
00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:19,470
I wanna hear this.
- Well, what's wrong
149
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:22,510
with union President Tuttle?
- That incompetent bozo?
150
00:06:22,510 --> 00:06:24,210
He should've been
fired years ago.
151
00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:27,880
- Incompetent bozo?
152
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:29,250
Fired?
153
00:06:29,250 --> 00:06:30,820
We'll see about that!
154
00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,830
- He said what?
- That double-crosser
155
00:06:40,830 --> 00:06:43,960
called us spineless,
incompetent jellyfish!
156
00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:45,730
- This is an outrage!
157
00:06:45,740 --> 00:06:47,270
- I never trusted him.
158
00:06:47,270 --> 00:06:50,470
I knew that goofy demeanor
was a cover for something!
159
00:06:50,470 --> 00:06:51,470
- Follow me.
160
00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,440
(loud knocking)
161
00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:58,780
Okay, Belding, show your face.
162
00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:02,550
- Something wrong?
163
00:07:02,550 --> 00:07:04,080
Have you told the teachers
how I feel about them?
164
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,290
- Oh, yes.
165
00:07:05,290 --> 00:07:08,320
And our response is unanimous.
166
00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:09,360
- We strike!
167
00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,290
- They strike.
- And we go skiing.
168
00:07:14,660 --> 00:07:17,260
(upbeat music)
169
00:07:21,070 --> 00:07:23,240
Bye, Gretchen.
- Bye, Inga.
170
00:07:24,340 --> 00:07:26,940
(blowing kiss)
171
00:07:30,010 --> 00:07:33,610
- Hey, guys, how was skiing?
- Skiing?
172
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:34,420
Looked like fun.
173
00:07:36,290 --> 00:07:39,490
- He was too busy with
Gretchen to even go outside.
174
00:07:39,490 --> 00:07:41,020
- Hey, man, snow is cold.
175
00:07:42,990 --> 00:07:45,490
- Where's Screech?
- Where he's supposed to be.
176
00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:46,690
Bringing in our luggage.
177
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:58,240
(loud yelping)
178
00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:00,810
- [Jessie] Screech,
are you okay?
179
00:08:00,810 --> 00:08:03,710
- Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
180
00:08:03,710 --> 00:08:05,110
Luckily I landed on my head.
181
00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:07,520
- Are you sure
you're okay, Screech?
182
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,220
Because the academic
bowl is in a few days,
183
00:08:09,220 --> 00:08:11,390
and we need your help.
- Oh, he's fine.
184
00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:14,390
He just got the sniffles
from skiing in his underwear.
185
00:08:14,390 --> 00:08:16,120
- Why were you skiing
in your underwear?
186
00:08:16,130 --> 00:08:17,660
- Because I forgot my pajamas.
187
00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:19,360
- You go skiing in your pajamas?
188
00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,630
- Now, why would I do that?
189
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:23,230
Then I'd have nothing
to sleep in at night.
190
00:08:23,230 --> 00:08:24,700
- But--
- Stop.
191
00:08:24,700 --> 00:08:26,630
Look, Screech got up one
night to go to the bathroom,
192
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,540
opened the patio
door up by mistake,
193
00:08:28,540 --> 00:08:30,240
and a gust of wind
sent him airborne.
194
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:31,770
- And by the time we found him,
195
00:08:31,770 --> 00:08:33,810
he had qualified for
the Polish ski team.
196
00:08:35,110 --> 00:08:36,610
- Glad you're okay, Screech.
197
00:08:36,610 --> 00:08:38,710
We've got academic bowl
practice in a few minutes.
198
00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,320
- You guys are going to
school when you don't have to?
199
00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:43,750
That's sick.
- Well, you guys will
200
00:08:43,750 --> 00:08:45,490
be going to school
with us tomorrow,
201
00:08:45,490 --> 00:08:47,050
because Belding and Tuttle are
202
00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:48,560
settling the strike right now.
203
00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:50,990
- I don't like
the sound of that.
204
00:08:50,990 --> 00:08:51,830
- Me, neither.
205
00:08:53,930 --> 00:08:56,530
(laughing)
- I'm glad we were
206
00:08:56,530 --> 00:08:58,370
able to clear things
up, Mr. Tuttle.
207
00:08:58,370 --> 00:08:59,800
- I agree, Mr. Belding.
208
00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:01,700
The strike is over.
- All right.
209
00:09:02,870 --> 00:09:04,440
- I guess Belding was
right about the teachers
210
00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:06,010
not putting up much of
a fight, huh, Slater?
211
00:09:06,010 --> 00:09:07,880
- Yeah, they are spineless.
212
00:09:09,010 --> 00:09:10,610
- Spineless?
213
00:09:10,610 --> 00:09:13,210
Well we fought for
and won every demand.
214
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,680
- Well, of course you did.
215
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:17,020
You were only asking for
more money and better hours.
216
00:09:17,020 --> 00:09:18,450
- What else is there?
217
00:09:18,450 --> 00:09:20,960
- Oh, just a little
something called respect.
218
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:23,490
- Respect?
- Respect.
219
00:09:23,490 --> 00:09:26,760
Like having a parking
space near your classroom.
220
00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:29,400
- No respect.
- And a teacher's lounge
221
00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:31,570
to relax in.
- No respect at all.
222
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:34,170
- But of course, if you're
happier with money, take it.
223
00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:35,640
I'm only a student,
what do I know?
224
00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:39,670
- No, no, no, young Morris,
you are wise beyond your years.
225
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,080
Excuse me, I have
some jellyfish to fry.
226
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:43,880
- Oh, go.
227
00:09:47,250 --> 00:09:49,950
(loud knocking)
228
00:09:49,950 --> 00:09:52,350
- Yes, Mr. Tuttle?
- Nice try, Belding.
229
00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:55,990
The teachers demand respect.
- Well, what do you mean?
230
00:09:55,990 --> 00:09:57,890
- Don't play dumb with me.
231
00:09:57,890 --> 00:09:59,830
We'll see you on
the picket line.
232
00:10:00,730 --> 00:10:02,300
- But...
233
00:10:02,300 --> 00:10:03,730
- What happened, Mr. Belding?
234
00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:05,600
I thought you and Mr. Tuttle
had things worked out.
235
00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,400
- So did I.
- So I guess
236
00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,670
this strike can go on
for a few more days, huh?
237
00:10:09,670 --> 00:10:12,670
- I think the strike
could go on all semester.
238
00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:14,880
- Well, what about the
academic bowl next week?
239
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,540
- If the teachers vote to
stay out on strike tonight,
240
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:20,310
it means no school
and no academic bowl.
241
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:23,620
I'm sorry.
- Oh, I'm sorry, too.
242
00:10:23,620 --> 00:10:24,890
- No academic bowl?
243
00:10:25,820 --> 00:10:27,020
- Well, thanks, guys.
244
00:10:27,020 --> 00:10:29,560
Now all that hard work
is down the drain.
245
00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:32,560
- No academic bowl?
- Some friends.
246
00:10:32,560 --> 00:10:35,500
You don't care who you hurt.
- No academic bowl?
247
00:10:37,430 --> 00:10:39,500
(crying)
248
00:10:40,870 --> 00:10:43,400
(upbeat music)
249
00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:51,810
- Ladies and gentlemen, I
spoke to the school board,
250
00:10:51,810 --> 00:10:53,950
and I have good
news and bad news.
251
00:10:54,950 --> 00:10:56,750
The good news is, they listened
252
00:10:56,750 --> 00:10:59,020
to every one of your demands.
253
00:11:00,420 --> 00:11:03,320
The bad news is, they said
no way, no how, forget it.
254
00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,630
(groaning)
255
00:11:05,630 --> 00:11:06,960
- Then we strike!
256
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:09,900
- Now, hold on, hold on now.
257
00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:11,470
Be reasonable.
258
00:11:11,470 --> 00:11:13,600
This looks bad for the school.
259
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,640
- Doesn't bother me.
- Me, neither.
260
00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:17,200
- Well, it bothers me.
261
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:19,040
I don't wanna be known
as the only principal
262
00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:21,540
that can't get along
with his teachers.
263
00:11:21,540 --> 00:11:23,440
- Hey, wait, come on.
264
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,850
You didn't let Mr.
Belding finish.
265
00:11:25,850 --> 00:11:28,420
Since the school board
wouldn't meet your demands,
266
00:11:28,420 --> 00:11:31,890
Mr. Belding came up
with his own proposal.
267
00:11:31,890 --> 00:11:33,350
- I did?
- Yes, sir.
268
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:34,560
Don't you remember?
269
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,290
You asked us to
type it up for you.
270
00:11:36,290 --> 00:11:37,460
- Oh, I did?
- Yeah, I'll read it
271
00:11:37,460 --> 00:11:39,660
to help jog your memory, sir.
272
00:11:39,660 --> 00:11:40,900
All right.
273
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:42,600
Item one, teacher's lounge.
274
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,900
Since there is no
lounge, Mr. Belding will
275
00:11:44,900 --> 00:11:46,700
provide his office
during odd periods
276
00:11:46,700 --> 00:11:50,040
for teachers to relax.
277
00:11:51,170 --> 00:11:52,440
- Don't worry, sir.
278
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:54,140
Your office is so ugly,
they won't stay long.
279
00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:57,710
- Item two, parking spaces.
280
00:11:57,710 --> 00:12:00,250
Mr. Belding volunteers
to give up his space,
281
00:12:00,250 --> 00:12:02,480
and park with the students.
282
00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:05,650
This way, every teacher
will be one space closer
283
00:12:05,650 --> 00:12:08,590
to the school.
(applauding)
284
00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:12,460
- Absolutely not.
285
00:12:12,460 --> 00:12:14,700
I refuse to ride that
smelly, old shuttle bus.
286
00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:15,630
- Oh, don't worry, sir.
287
00:12:15,630 --> 00:12:17,060
We'll save you a window seat.
288
00:12:18,470 --> 00:12:21,070
- Finally, Mr. Belding
will use his annual bonus
289
00:12:21,070 --> 00:12:24,040
to pay for the faculty
Christmas party.
290
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:28,880
You gotta respect that.
(audience applauding)
291
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:30,480
- Wonderful.
- All right.
292
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:31,810
- We accept.
293
00:12:31,810 --> 00:12:34,780
The teachers are back
to work as of tomorrow.
294
00:12:38,650 --> 00:12:40,120
- Mr. Tuttle, welcome back.
295
00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:43,290
- Well, girls, are you ready
to bone up for the bowl?
296
00:12:43,290 --> 00:12:44,830
- Put us to the
test, Mr. Tuttle.
297
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:46,660
I've got an itchy buzzer finger.
298
00:12:46,660 --> 00:12:49,360
- I'm so glad the academic
bowl wasn't canceled.
299
00:12:49,370 --> 00:12:50,930
- So am I, Miss. Spano.
300
00:12:50,930 --> 00:12:52,600
The hard work you've
put in will be
301
00:12:52,600 --> 00:12:55,900
the winning complement to
Mr. Screech's brainy energy.
302
00:12:55,910 --> 00:12:57,140
Let's begin.
- Great.
303
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,310
(blowing nose)
304
00:13:02,310 --> 00:13:03,980
Screech, are you okay?
305
00:13:03,980 --> 00:13:05,780
- Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
306
00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:12,120
Just a little head cold.
(loud sneezing)
307
00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:16,920
- So Mr. Screech, are you sure
you're feeling up to this?
308
00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:17,760
- Yes.
309
00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,230
Positive.
310
00:13:19,230 --> 00:13:21,400
(loud sneezing)
311
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,700
- All right, let's begin.
312
00:13:23,700 --> 00:13:25,070
Question one.
313
00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:28,140
What are the two chief
classes of nebuli?
314
00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:31,970
(imitating buzzer)
315
00:13:31,970 --> 00:13:33,440
- Emissions and reflection.
316
00:13:37,910 --> 00:13:39,050
- Mr. Tuttle, he's burning up!
317
00:13:39,050 --> 00:13:40,510
- Let's get him to the nurse.
318
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,820
Mr. Screech, I'm afraid your
bowl practice is over for good.
319
00:13:44,650 --> 00:13:45,490
- Thanks, Mom.
320
00:13:46,490 --> 00:13:49,260
(buzzer buzzing)
321
00:13:53,730 --> 00:13:55,460
- Here are your
malts, gentlemen.
322
00:13:55,460 --> 00:13:57,000
I made them extra thick.
323
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:58,230
I hope you choke on them.
324
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:02,400
- Jessie, it is not our
fault that Screech got sick.
325
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:04,400
The doofus fell out of a window.
326
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:06,470
- You took the doofus skiing.
- All right, all right.
327
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:09,140
How many times do you want
us to say we're sorry?
328
00:14:09,150 --> 00:14:11,610
- Say it again.
- We're sorry.
329
00:14:11,610 --> 00:14:12,510
- Not good enough.
330
00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:15,920
- Jessie, getting angry is not
331
00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:17,990
making our situation any better.
332
00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:19,750
- Right, with Screech
stuck in the hospital,
333
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:22,920
we should be concentrating
on finding a replacement.
334
00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:24,390
- Maybe I can do it.
- Slater,
335
00:14:24,390 --> 00:14:26,760
you have wrestling practice
every day after school.
336
00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:28,530
And besides, whoever
takes Screech's place
337
00:14:28,530 --> 00:14:30,730
would have to study
right up until bowl day.
338
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,270
- Well, maybe it's a lost cause.
339
00:14:34,270 --> 00:14:37,100
I mean, we should
probably just forfeit.
340
00:14:37,110 --> 00:14:38,340
- Never.
341
00:14:38,340 --> 00:14:39,370
We canceled a perfectly
good teacher's strike
342
00:14:39,380 --> 00:14:40,470
for this stupid thing.
343
00:14:47,050 --> 00:14:48,380
- Uh oh, nerd alert.
344
00:14:48,380 --> 00:14:49,620
It's the Valley bowl team.
345
00:14:49,620 --> 00:14:50,990
- Well, look de,
look de, look de.
346
00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:53,290
It's the Bayside
bowl team bimbos.
347
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:58,030
- I guess you'll forfeit
now that you're Screechless.
348
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,730
- No, we'll be there, Gladys.
349
00:15:01,730 --> 00:15:03,160
And you can bet no
one from our team
350
00:15:03,170 --> 00:15:06,900
will be dressed for a flood.
- Hey, back off lady.
351
00:15:06,900 --> 00:15:09,470
My mom personally
selects my attire.
352
00:15:09,470 --> 00:15:11,010
- Save your breath, Earl.
353
00:15:11,010 --> 00:15:12,370
We're dealing with people
who think quantum physics
354
00:15:12,380 --> 00:15:15,510
is a TV show.
(laughing)
355
00:15:15,510 --> 00:15:17,340
- Hey, I wouldn't
laugh too loud, guys.
356
00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:19,910
These girls are gonna beat the
tape right off your glasses.
357
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,580
- If you're so
confident, why don't you
358
00:15:21,580 --> 00:15:23,080
take Screech's place.
359
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:26,320
- Ha, he couldn't speak
and buzz at the same time.
360
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,960
- All right, scrambled
egg heads, you're on.
361
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,160
Guess what?
362
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:32,060
We're gonna mop
the floor with you.
363
00:15:33,530 --> 00:15:34,960
- Get outta here.
364
00:15:39,540 --> 00:15:41,440
- All right, Screech,
I'm ready to learn.
365
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:43,700
Now, Lisa and Jessie
have English, art
and history covered.
366
00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:44,910
Now, just give me
everything you've got
367
00:15:44,910 --> 00:15:47,710
in math and science.
- Okay.
368
00:15:47,710 --> 00:15:49,410
Astrophysics.
369
00:15:49,410 --> 00:15:52,510
First, think of astro,
the Jetson's dog.
370
00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:58,590
Jetson's means jet propulsion
with properties a, b, c,
371
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:02,060
see you real soon.
372
00:16:04,830 --> 00:16:09,130
- Oh, no, he died.
- Oh, I'm back.
373
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:12,630
Let's move on to the planets.
- Okay.
374
00:16:12,630 --> 00:16:14,800
- Can you remember
the word, MVEMJSUNP?
375
00:16:16,510 --> 00:16:19,070
- MVEMJSUNP?
- MVEMJSUNP?
376
00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,310
- Yes, it's the
name of the planets
377
00:16:20,310 --> 00:16:22,510
according to their
distance to the sun.
378
00:16:22,510 --> 00:16:23,340
MVEMJSUNP.
379
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:29,250
M, Mercury, V, Venus,
E, E, E-I-E-I-O.
380
00:16:35,390 --> 00:16:38,060
- Screech, Screech,
what's the rest of it?
381
00:16:38,060 --> 00:16:41,860
♪ Old MacDonald had a farm ♪
382
00:16:41,860 --> 00:16:43,330
- Well, it's too bad
we couldn't get Screech
383
00:16:43,330 --> 00:16:44,470
to coach Valley.
384
00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:45,970
They'd be so confused,
we'd kill 'em.
385
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:48,770
- Coaching the Valley team.
386
00:16:48,770 --> 00:16:50,200
What an interesting concept.
387
00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:53,910
(upbeat music)
388
00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:55,380
- Why did you ask us
here, muscle brain?
389
00:16:55,380 --> 00:16:57,640
The bowl's tomorrow night,
and we're on a tight schedule.
390
00:16:57,650 --> 00:16:59,050
- Okay, here's the deal.
391
00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:03,080
I volunteered to take
Screech's place on the team.
392
00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:06,720
But they laughed at me and
they said no jocks allowed.
393
00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:08,560
- So what does this
have to do with us?
394
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:11,230
- I'm angry, and I
wanna help you guys win.
395
00:17:11,230 --> 00:17:12,460
- We don't need your help.
396
00:17:12,460 --> 00:17:14,360
Without Screech,
they're dead meat.
397
00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:15,300
- Yeah?
398
00:17:15,300 --> 00:17:16,530
Well, I got news for you.
399
00:17:16,530 --> 00:17:19,930
Screech is back.
- Screech is back?
400
00:17:19,940 --> 00:17:22,700
(surprised oohing)
401
00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:25,370
- Well, he's not
actually back, back.
402
00:17:25,370 --> 00:17:29,080
Screech has taught Zack
everything he knows.
403
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:30,310
- Everything?
404
00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:32,150
Even thermal nuclear
global timeshare?
405
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,380
- Advanced thermonuclear
global timeshare.
406
00:17:35,380 --> 00:17:37,480
(gasping)
- Uh oh.
407
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:39,120
- I smell trouble.
408
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:40,620
- Guys, guys, don't sweat it.
409
00:17:40,620 --> 00:17:41,990
I know their strategy.
410
00:17:41,990 --> 00:17:44,660
They're planing to win
in the sports category.
411
00:17:44,660 --> 00:17:46,190
- Well, we know
all about sports.
412
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:47,630
We've been studying for months.
413
00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:48,830
- Yeah?
414
00:17:48,830 --> 00:17:50,260
Well, make sure you
concentrate on football.
415
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,800
Zack's an expert.
416
00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:54,630
- If that's the case, we'll
concentrate on the pigskin.
417
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:55,700
- Don't forget,
that's the sport where
418
00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,570
they wear the helmets.
- We know.
419
00:17:57,570 --> 00:17:58,410
That's so they don't
get hurt when they
420
00:17:58,410 --> 00:17:59,370
fall off their horse.
421
00:18:10,550 --> 00:18:11,820
- All right, academic bowlers.
422
00:18:11,820 --> 00:18:13,550
In a moment, the
game will begin.
423
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:16,160
Remember this, winning
isn't everything.
424
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:17,990
But losing stinks!
425
00:18:19,830 --> 00:18:20,930
- Go Bayside!
426
00:18:22,030 --> 00:18:23,430
- All right.
427
00:18:23,430 --> 00:18:25,300
Nerds buy our plan?
- Touchdown.
428
00:18:29,810 --> 00:18:31,310
- Sorry I'm late, everyone.
429
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:33,540
I missed the shuttle bus and
had to run across campus.
430
00:18:34,810 --> 00:18:36,380
- Now you know why I'm
late every morning.
431
00:18:38,010 --> 00:18:41,320
- Welcome to the annual
Bayside Valley academic bowl.
432
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:44,150
(game show music)
433
00:18:46,460 --> 00:18:47,850
There are six categories.
434
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:50,060
The controlling team
gets to pick any subject
435
00:18:50,060 --> 00:18:51,630
within the given category.
436
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:54,360
Contestants, are you ready?
- Ready.
437
00:18:54,360 --> 00:18:55,200
- You bet.
438
00:18:56,630 --> 00:18:59,530
- Okay, opening question
for control of the board.
439
00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:02,000
Category, literature.
440
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:05,010
What was author Mark
Twain's real name?
441
00:19:05,010 --> 00:19:07,070
(buzzer buzzing)
- Samuel Clemons.
442
00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:07,910
- Correct.
443
00:19:10,850 --> 00:19:14,150
Next question, category
still literature.
444
00:19:14,150 --> 00:19:17,080
In Grimm's fairy
tale Snow White,
445
00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:19,220
what were the names
of the seven dwarves.
446
00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:21,990
- Bashful, Doc,
Dopey, Grumpy, Happy,
447
00:19:21,990 --> 00:19:23,690
Sleepy, Sneezy.
- Right.
448
00:19:23,690 --> 00:19:25,790
(cheering)
449
00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:29,230
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry
but that's wrong.
450
00:19:29,230 --> 00:19:30,500
(buzzer buzzing)
451
00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:32,970
Now, nerds, I mean,
Valley for control.
452
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:36,240
- In Grimm's version
they had no names.
453
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,570
They were later
named by Walt Disney.
454
00:19:38,570 --> 00:19:42,340
- That's correct for 15 points.
455
00:19:42,340 --> 00:19:44,380
(upbeat music)
456
00:19:44,380 --> 00:19:46,610
Name this duck billed mammal.
457
00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:47,880
(buzzer buzzing)
- Platypus.
458
00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:49,520
- Correct for 15 points!
459
00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:52,390
(applauding)
460
00:19:52,390 --> 00:19:53,850
Next question.
461
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,690
The bird that is
said to hide its head
462
00:19:55,690 --> 00:19:56,960
in the sand--
(buzzer buzzing)
463
00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:58,960
- Ostrich.
- Is the ostrich.
464
00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:02,300
How fast does it run?
(buzzer buzzing)
465
00:20:02,300 --> 00:20:04,100
- 50 miles an hour?
466
00:20:04,100 --> 00:20:04,930
- Correct!
467
00:20:07,900 --> 00:20:09,540
- When is this great plan
of yours gonna start, Zack?
468
00:20:09,540 --> 00:20:11,710
We're losing by 45 points.
- Patience, Jessie.
469
00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:14,640
We've got them right
where we want them.
470
00:20:15,740 --> 00:20:18,110
- Okay, contestants,
final round.
471
00:20:18,110 --> 00:20:20,610
Question value
doubles to 30 points.
472
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:22,180
Category is sports.
473
00:20:22,180 --> 00:20:24,420
Bayside, choose the subject.
474
00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:26,150
- I think I'll pick football.
475
00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:29,860
Ah, let's live dangerously.
476
00:20:29,860 --> 00:20:32,930
Make it basketball.
- What happened to football?
477
00:20:36,130 --> 00:20:37,930
- Okay, first question.
478
00:20:37,930 --> 00:20:40,170
Name the famous
Los Angeles center
479
00:20:40,170 --> 00:20:43,540
who holds the NBA's
career scoring record.
480
00:20:43,540 --> 00:20:46,870
(buzzer buzzing)
- It's that Kareem guy.
481
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:48,580
Kareem Abdul Montana.
482
00:20:50,210 --> 00:20:52,580
- No, I'm sorry.
(buzzer buzzing)
483
00:20:52,580 --> 00:20:55,980
Bayside?
- Is it Kareem Abdul Jabar?
484
00:20:55,980 --> 00:20:59,920
- Correct for 30 points!
(audience applauding)
485
00:21:01,590 --> 00:21:04,860
Question two, who
is the Chicago Bull
486
00:21:04,860 --> 00:21:06,830
that defies gravity?
(buzzer buzzing)
487
00:21:06,830 --> 00:21:08,400
- That would be Air, Air McMann.
488
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:09,530
- No, stupid!
489
00:21:09,530 --> 00:21:13,070
That's the guy on Starsearch!
- Oh.
490
00:21:13,070 --> 00:21:14,270
- Bayside.
491
00:21:14,270 --> 00:21:16,540
- I believe it's
Michael Air Jordan.
492
00:21:16,540 --> 00:21:18,040
- Correct, 30 more points.
493
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:25,180
If Bayside answers the
final question correctly,
494
00:21:25,180 --> 00:21:26,010
they'll be tied.
495
00:21:29,250 --> 00:21:32,120
Who invented basketball?
496
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:34,620
- O.J. Simpson.
497
00:21:35,490 --> 00:21:36,760
- No he's a football player.
498
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,660
- Okay, O.J. Chamberlain.
499
00:21:39,660 --> 00:21:40,730
- No.
500
00:21:40,730 --> 00:21:42,460
That is wrong and ridiculous.
501
00:21:43,370 --> 00:21:44,160
Bayside?
502
00:21:45,330 --> 00:21:47,100
- Here's a wild guess.
503
00:21:47,100 --> 00:21:48,900
Is it James Naismith?
504
00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:51,440
- Correct!
(cheering)
505
00:21:54,740 --> 00:21:55,540
We have a tie.
506
00:21:57,010 --> 00:21:59,210
And now to break the tie,
a wild card tie breaker
507
00:21:59,210 --> 00:22:00,110
toss up question.
508
00:22:02,550 --> 00:22:05,390
Name the solar
system's nine planets,
509
00:22:05,390 --> 00:22:08,150
starting with the
closest to the sun.
510
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,360
(buzzer buzzing)
- That would be MVEMSJUNP.
511
00:22:11,490 --> 00:22:13,660
That's Mercury,
Venus, Earth, Mars,
512
00:22:13,660 --> 00:22:17,130
Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus,
Neptune, and Pluto?
513
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:24,900
- Correct!
(cheering)
514
00:22:26,110 --> 00:22:29,180
Good work, people!
- Oh, thank you, sir!
515
00:22:29,180 --> 00:22:30,340
Are you coming to
the victory party?
516
00:22:30,350 --> 00:22:32,010
- Well, sure, where is it?
517
00:22:32,010 --> 00:22:33,510
- Well, it's in the
new teacher's lounge.
518
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:34,950
- Hey, that's my office.
519
00:22:34,950 --> 00:22:36,380
You'll wreck everything.
520
00:22:36,390 --> 00:22:37,980
- Well, if it's a
good party we will.
521
00:22:37,990 --> 00:22:39,290
Solidarity, brother.
522
00:22:49,700 --> 00:22:52,500
(fast rock music)
37878
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