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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,545 --> 00:00:05,630 (male narrator) Ten years ago, a crack commando unit... 2 00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,507 was sent to prison by a military court... 3 00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:09,259 for a crime they didn't commit. 4 00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:10,593 These men promptly escaped... 5 00:00:10,635 --> 00:00:12,220 from a maximum-security stockade... 6 00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:14,180 to the Los Angeles underground. 7 00:00:14,222 --> 00:00:15,807 Today, still wanted by the government... 8 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:18,226 they survive as soldiers of fortune. 9 00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:20,687 If you have a problem, if no one else can help... 10 00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:22,147 and if you can find them... 11 00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:25,316 maybe you can hire the A-Team. 12 00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:40,392 [birds chirping] 13 00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:50,151 [oinking] 14 00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:52,821 [crowing] 15 00:01:58,451 --> 00:02:01,329 [dog barking] 16 00:02:03,873 --> 00:02:06,876 [church bells tolling] 17 00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:22,475 [church bells tolling] 18 00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:30,608 [engines revving] 19 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:10,565 -Give me Al Massey! 20 00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:12,442 Give him to me, now! 21 00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:30,710 [gunfire and bells ringing] 22 00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:31,795 Come out! 23 00:03:34,547 --> 00:03:36,549 Come out! 24 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,815 -Please, jefe, please! 25 00:03:51,856 --> 00:03:53,775 We are just poor farmers. 26 00:03:53,817 --> 00:03:56,486 We give you everything! 27 00:03:56,528 --> 00:03:58,905 -I want Al Massey! 28 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,407 Where is he? 29 00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:04,452 Where do you hide this gringo pig? 30 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:08,039 [chuckles] 31 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:11,626 Paco is requesting the pleasure of your youngest 32 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,086 granddaughter. 33 00:04:13,128 --> 00:04:14,045 -No! 34 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,714 [laughs] 35 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:18,383 -He says, he could give him a great daughter, amigo! 36 00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:19,801 [Spanish] 37 00:04:19,843 --> 00:04:21,636 [laughs] 38 00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:32,647 [screaming] 39 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:43,450 He is one with the ladies, no? 40 00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:47,412 Paco, ask this peasant girl, where is Al Massey? 41 00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:50,040 [Spanish] 42 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:57,339 [laughs] 43 00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,132 [car engine revs] 44 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:01,134 -They're coming. 45 00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,011 We must hurry. 46 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:04,637 -Get out of here, Manny. 47 00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:06,056 Go on, hide! He doesn't know about you. 48 00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,474 -He'll find out. These people are frightened. 49 00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:09,642 They'll tell. 50 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,895 -I am not taking you with me, kiddo. 51 00:05:11,936 --> 00:05:14,105 I got the story. I'm gonna write it. 52 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,482 -And I do not share bylines. 53 00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:16,941 Sure you do. 54 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,943 [gunfire] 55 00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:25,033 VALDEZ (OFFSCREEN): Hey, Mr. Massey! 56 00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:27,035 How 'bout you come out 57 00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:29,996 before I set fire to this whole stinking town? 58 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,998 We talk, Mr. Massey. 59 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:36,961 You will see that I am a poor country man, a lover of life, 60 00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:42,467 a hunter of rabbits, a singer of songs. 61 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,469 We will talk. 62 00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:47,055 You come out, OK? 63 00:05:47,097 --> 00:05:49,599 -Adios, amigo. 64 00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:52,477 [engine revs] 65 00:05:56,648 --> 00:05:58,108 -Ole, muchacho. 66 00:05:58,149 --> 00:05:59,818 Vamonos! 67 00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:12,997 [gunfire] 68 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:14,624 [laughs] 69 00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:35,687 [crash] 70 00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:47,532 [gunfire] 71 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:49,659 -[laughs] 72 00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:53,204 [gunfire] 73 00:07:04,632 --> 00:07:07,844 -You make a big mistake with me, idiota. 74 00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:11,056 How many people you tell about me? 75 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,099 Why you come down here? 76 00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,601 Eh? 77 00:07:14,642 --> 00:07:15,727 -I'm on vacation. 78 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,520 -He's not on vacation! 79 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,646 -Who the hell cares? 80 00:07:18,688 --> 00:07:20,231 He's on vacation, he's not. 81 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,817 Last year, we sent him to cover the French elections. 82 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:25,570 Did I get a story? Did I? No! 83 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:28,615 He ends up lushed out of his gourd in Costa del Sol. 84 00:07:28,656 --> 00:07:31,117 The paper eats 20 grand in expenses 85 00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:32,619 and Massey doesn't file a word. 86 00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,245 -That is not the point. 87 00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,873 -The point is that you're all over the road, Allen. 88 00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:39,626 Look, Mexican Embassy complains that you are 89 00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:41,586 threatening them. Look, look! 90 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,630 Special requests from Senator Billings's office-- 91 00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:46,633 using this paper to stir up trouble with the US Senate 92 00:07:46,675 --> 00:07:48,218 and the Mexican Government. 93 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,803 -I was trying to find out what happened to him. 94 00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,763 They claim he never even entered Mexico. 95 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,515 Dammit, Grant! 96 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:55,016 Doesn't this rag have a responsibility 97 00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,976 to protect its reporters on assignment? 98 00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:58,728 -Al Massey's been doing wheels up landings 99 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,271 around here for over a year. 100 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:02,899 I'm tired of scraping him off the front steps. 101 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:06,069 -His wife died. He's been depressed. 102 00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:08,071 -I've been carrying him. But now, I'm through. 103 00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:10,699 He's going to show up in a couple of weeks down there at 104 00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,992 a bullfight, wearing a lampshade. 105 00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,745 I'm not going to waste any more of this paper's money on 106 00:08:15,787 --> 00:08:17,664 that lost cause. 107 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,791 And I'll be damned if I'm going to let you use this 108 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:22,669 paper's influence to rattle windows. 109 00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:25,672 You got that? 110 00:08:25,714 --> 00:08:26,881 -He's my friend. 111 00:08:30,927 --> 00:08:35,015 -Allen, you need some time off. 112 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:38,018 I'm suspending you at half pay for two weeks. 113 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,937 You're a good reporter, but you got to find 114 00:08:40,979 --> 00:08:42,772 some way to stop sitting on your brains. 115 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:45,692 Turn over your feature stuff to Mark and file your filler 116 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:46,860 before you leave. 117 00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:48,111 -Just like that? 118 00:08:51,906 --> 00:08:54,951 -Honey, get out, before I pull your plug all the way. 119 00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:02,709 [applause] 120 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,712 -All right! 121 00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:07,589 Somebody had to say it. 122 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:08,673 You all right? 123 00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,885 -Hm-mm. 124 00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:15,305 [door slams] 125 00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:18,141 -That was really great, you telling that fat-head 126 00:09:18,183 --> 00:09:20,894 about journalistic responsibility. 127 00:09:20,935 --> 00:09:22,979 -Did you find Massey's research paper? 128 00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:25,231 Did he file any copy at all? 129 00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:28,360 -Nothing. I did take the liberty of stopping by his house. 130 00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,362 I used to do a little second-story work when I was 131 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,739 with the "Miami Herald." I am a killer 132 00:09:32,781 --> 00:09:34,240 with louvered windows. 133 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:37,035 Anyway, I went through his apartment last night 134 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,996 and pulled out this from under his mattress. 135 00:09:40,038 --> 00:09:42,874 -"San Rio Blanco." 136 00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:44,668 What? Is this all there is? 137 00:09:44,709 --> 00:09:46,628 A name, Manny Cortes, and a phone number? 138 00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:48,088 -Yep. I looked it up. 139 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:50,131 And San Rio Blanco is a little town in 140 00:09:50,173 --> 00:09:53,927 the hills above Acapulco. 141 00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:55,261 -What about that other thing? 142 00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:56,971 Uh, that commando team. 143 00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,766 Did you get anything more on that? 144 00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:01,142 Zack, I'm talking to you! 145 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,936 -Look, kid, I told you. It is a rumor. 146 00:10:02,977 --> 00:10:05,647 Strictly a rumor. 147 00:10:05,689 --> 00:10:08,441 Mike Kelly tried to follow that story about six months 148 00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,068 ago before he got sacked. 149 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,028 He couldn't even prove that they existed. 150 00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:14,781 There was a rumor that they broke some senator's kid out 151 00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:16,116 of the Turkish prison. 152 00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:18,868 Soldiers of fortune, outriders who would 153 00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:19,953 do anything, anywhere-- 154 00:10:19,994 --> 00:10:21,162 -The A-Team. 155 00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:22,205 Isn't that what he called them? 156 00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:23,206 -Yeah, yeah. 157 00:10:23,248 --> 00:10:24,249 -Let's go. 158 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,084 -Terrific. 159 00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:29,713 -These guys knocked over the Bank of Hanoi 160 00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:33,425 four days after the Vietnam War ended. 161 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:38,013 They wandered out of the DMZ with 100 million yen 162 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:39,889 and got busted by the Army. 163 00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:41,725 Nobody knew anything about the mission. 164 00:10:41,766 --> 00:10:44,394 They claimed that they were under orders from a Colonel, 165 00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:46,771 uh, Morrison. 166 00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:49,190 But Morrison took a round in one of the last shellings. 167 00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:51,401 His headquarters burned to the ground. 168 00:10:51,443 --> 00:10:54,070 So no record of the mission was ever found. 169 00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:55,780 There was a big stink. 170 00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,992 And then right before the trial, they went over 171 00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:00,910 the wall and pfft! Disappeared. 172 00:11:00,952 --> 00:11:01,995 That was 10 years ago. 173 00:11:02,037 --> 00:11:02,996 -And they're still wanted? 174 00:11:03,038 --> 00:11:04,497 -Oh, yeah, yeah. 175 00:11:04,539 --> 00:11:06,499 There's one guy in here, a-- 176 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:07,459 [snaps fingers, claps] 177 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,169 -Oh, here! 178 00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:13,173 A colonel named, uh, Lynch. 179 00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:15,800 He ran the prison at Fort Bragg. 180 00:11:15,842 --> 00:11:17,844 He is still looking for them. 181 00:11:17,886 --> 00:11:20,388 It is a vendetta for him. 182 00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:22,057 -OK, Zach. 183 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:24,184 I'm sufficiently intrigued. Who are they? 184 00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:27,437 -All right. 185 00:11:27,479 --> 00:11:32,859 The leader is a colonel named John Smith. 186 00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,235 But everybody calls him Hannibal. 187 00:11:34,277 --> 00:11:37,947 The guy has a very unorthodox style. 188 00:11:37,989 --> 00:11:39,824 -Not bad. 189 00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:41,493 -Who else? 190 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:47,207 -Bosco Baracus, known as B.A. for "Bad Attitude." 191 00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:49,501 Man is a mechanical genius. 192 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:53,338 He also has one of the worst conduct records in the Army. 193 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,298 He likes to slug officers. 194 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,516 -Now, this is more like it. 195 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:07,060 -Templeton Peck, known as The Faceman. 196 00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:09,229 In and out of trouble. An orphan from LA. 197 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:13,191 This guy is Mr. Ricky-Ticky, a con man, a real operator. 198 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:16,236 And that's the unit. 199 00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:18,113 -I wonder where they are now. 200 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,210 -Hannibal's got to be down there somewhere. 201 00:12:35,338 --> 00:12:36,798 Let's go! 202 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:39,843 -Cut! Who the hell is that? 203 00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:42,178 Where did that moron come from? 204 00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:45,765 Hey, Mike, don't we have an AD 205 00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:47,559 to hold the traffic on that road? 206 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:48,935 MIKE (OFFSCREEN): Sorry, Jerry, that's our screw-up. 207 00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:50,562 I'll get a guy right up there. 208 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,313 -Come on! Come on, people! 209 00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:53,732 We're burning daylight here-- let's stay 210 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:54,858 together here, huh? 211 00:12:58,028 --> 00:13:00,405 -[gasping] Did you like the arms? 212 00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:03,950 -Johnny, I want 30 seconds underwater, 30 seconds after 213 00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:06,911 "Action!" You're popping up like the rubber duck in my kid's bathtub. 214 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:09,914 -I got to stay down there two minutes for the water to get still. 215 00:13:09,956 --> 00:13:12,834 You want 30 seconds after that? You got to be nuts! 216 00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:14,753 -Hey, pal, that's the job! 217 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:18,590 The guy we had in "Aquamania 1" stayed down four minutes. 218 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,258 -Then why isn't he doing it now? 219 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,302 -He had a little brain hemorrhage or something. 220 00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:23,678 I don't know. Anyhow, let's go. 221 00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,430 Come on, let's get this sucker in the can. 222 00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:28,516 Back in the drink, chickie. Same shot. 223 00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,852 -We're looking for John Smith. 224 00:13:30,894 --> 00:13:32,645 John! Hey, John! Where are you? 225 00:13:32,687 --> 00:13:35,023 -Hey, Face! It's me! 226 00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:36,691 -Get back in the lake! 227 00:13:36,733 --> 00:13:38,735 Come on! I'm on a tight clock here! 228 00:13:38,777 --> 00:13:40,904 -Just give us a second here, fellas. 229 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:42,697 He's on us. Colonel Lynch. 230 00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:45,283 He hit B.A.'s pad two hours ago with six MPs. 231 00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,701 They're all around my place like a bunch of goonies at a supermarket opening. 232 00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:48,036 -How did he trace us? 233 00:13:48,078 --> 00:13:49,537 -Maybe the senator's kid talked. 234 00:13:49,579 --> 00:13:50,830 I never thought he had all his lights on. 235 00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:52,665 -If he burned us, he knows about me. 236 00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:53,958 -You got it, Tonto. I think we should, like, disappear. 237 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,585 -I got one more shot and I'm through. 238 00:13:55,627 --> 00:13:57,295 Now, watch this. 239 00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,422 I think I got a real handle on my character here. 240 00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:03,510 I'm playing mean, but with a kind of a sad reluctance. 241 00:14:05,303 --> 00:14:06,805 -Yeah? You're about to get a chance 242 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:09,432 to play it for Colonel Lynch. 243 00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:12,018 -That's him. John Hannibal Smith. 244 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:13,937 Come on, get him! Go, go, go! 245 00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:17,607 -Give me my tail. 246 00:14:17,649 --> 00:14:19,901 -Where are you going? 247 00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:22,487 -To Waldorf Astoria, driver, and step on it. 248 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:23,571 -Funny! 249 00:14:23,613 --> 00:14:25,573 [car engine revs] 250 00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:27,951 -Up! 251 00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:30,537 Hey! Come back! 252 00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:36,835 Where is the Aquamaniac going? 253 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,796 [police sirens blaring] 254 00:14:39,838 --> 00:14:41,798 -Look out! 255 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:50,098 -We got to get off this movie lot, Hannibal! 256 00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,100 [tires screeching] 257 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:53,977 [police sirens blaring] 258 00:14:56,146 --> 00:14:57,480 -Come on, come on! 259 00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:05,697 -Mommy, mommy! It's the Aquamaniac! 260 00:15:05,739 --> 00:15:07,574 -Hi, how're you doing? 261 00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:10,660 -I ain't stopping for no autographs, Hannibal. 262 00:15:10,702 --> 00:15:15,040 [bells ringing] 263 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,379 -Take a right here. We'll cut through Roman Street. 264 00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,882 I know this lot like the back of my hand. 265 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:29,387 Oh, no. 266 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:31,056 They changed it. 267 00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:33,892 -"Like the back of your hand," huh, sucker? 268 00:15:38,396 --> 00:15:39,522 -Great! 269 00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:50,825 -Whoa! 270 00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:52,535 -One down, two to go! 271 00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:00,627 -Bradshaw, we just lost Henderson in the lake. 272 00:16:00,669 --> 00:16:02,045 You watch yourself now. 273 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:11,096 [crash] 274 00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,139 -Bradshaw, where are you? 275 00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,684 BRADSHAW (OFFSCREEN): I think I'm in Quincy's living room. 276 00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,686 -We're falling apart here. 277 00:16:17,727 --> 00:16:19,688 TOUR GUIDE (OFFSCREEN): We're now entering "The Parting of 278 00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:22,524 the Red Sea." As you can see it's going to be much easier 279 00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:24,401 for us than it was in the film. 280 00:16:24,442 --> 00:16:26,569 I don't think we're going to get wet today. 281 00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:28,029 Get that hunk of junk moving! 282 00:16:28,071 --> 00:16:30,699 Coming up behind us, that is the Aquamaniac. 283 00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:32,701 Let's turn around and give him a big wave. 284 00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:35,495 Well, now that we've gotten that out of the way, over on 285 00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:36,955 your left-- 286 00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,750 -Hold it. Let me out. 287 00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:43,044 -What are you doing, Hannibal? 288 00:16:43,086 --> 00:16:45,005 [tires screeching] 289 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,433 -What's he doing? 290 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,101 -Pull it! And let's make tracks! 291 00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:02,814 -Wait, wait! 292 00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:07,444 Ah, he's daring me. 293 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:18,496 Wa-wait! 294 00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:21,166 -He loves the risk, the danger. 295 00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:24,461 He loves the jazz. 296 00:17:24,502 --> 00:17:28,465 -Hold it, hold it, wait! 297 00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:30,759 Just a little bit more. 298 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:34,220 One more step and I got him. 299 00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:35,221 I got him. 300 00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:36,723 Now! 301 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,183 [tires screeching] 302 00:17:42,854 --> 00:17:45,940 [splash] 303 00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,035 -Colonel Lynch! 304 00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:03,083 Colonel Lynch! 305 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:04,542 Colonel Lynch, come up! 306 00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,002 Colonel Lynch! 307 00:18:06,044 --> 00:18:07,796 -Nice try, Colonel! 308 00:18:07,837 --> 00:18:09,964 But you ain't Moses. 309 00:18:19,641 --> 00:18:21,935 Beautiful, huh? Now, give me my tail. 310 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:28,817 -Dammit, Hannibal! 311 00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:29,984 All you had to do was pull the lever. 312 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,903 What was all that Maury Wills junk? 313 00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:34,531 He could have fired a shot or blown the wheel off this bus. 314 00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:36,574 -Old Hannibal love the jazz, man. 315 00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,826 He love the jazz. 316 00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,285 -Oh, lighten up, fellas. 317 00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:41,538 You got to do these things with style. 318 00:18:41,579 --> 00:18:44,541 Don't tell me you didn't love seeing him over his head there 319 00:18:44,582 --> 00:18:46,209 in rancid water? 320 00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:48,253 -No, we didn't love it. 321 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:50,005 -[chuckles] 322 00:18:58,513 --> 00:19:01,099 -There's a payphone. Pull over here. 323 00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:07,689 I got to call Murdock and tell him Lynch is after us again. 324 00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:11,735 -I ain't going anywhere with him, Hannibal. 325 00:19:15,530 --> 00:19:16,531 OPERATOR (OFFSCREEN): Veterans Administration 326 00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:19,117 Hospital, good afternoon. 327 00:19:19,159 --> 00:19:22,996 -Ah, may I speak to Mr. HM Murdock, please? 328 00:19:23,038 --> 00:19:24,873 He's in your mental ward. 329 00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:26,583 [phone rings] 330 00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,168 -I'll be with you in a minute, honey. 331 00:19:28,209 --> 00:19:29,794 Be with you a minute. I just got to answer my phone. 332 00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:30,837 I got to be alone with my phone. 333 00:19:30,879 --> 00:19:34,758 [phone rings] 334 00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:36,843 -Howling Mad Murdock here. 335 00:19:36,885 --> 00:19:39,054 -Murdock, Lynch fell on us. 336 00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:40,472 He may be heading your way. 337 00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,390 He may get real tough. 338 00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:44,809 -Oh, Hannibal, I've got some company standing out in the 339 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:45,894 hall right now. 340 00:19:45,935 --> 00:19:47,645 -Who's there, Murdock? 341 00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:49,064 -It's a girl reporter. 342 00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:50,774 She knows I flew you guys in 'Nam, got it 343 00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:51,858 from Pentagon records. 344 00:19:51,900 --> 00:19:53,693 -A reporter? 345 00:19:53,735 --> 00:19:56,863 -Yeah, only she's saying she got a job for us in "Mehico." 346 00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:58,865 You remember that friend of mine, that guy that kept 347 00:19:58,907 --> 00:20:00,575 fading out, that Mexican guy? 348 00:20:00,617 --> 00:20:02,535 -Be careful of the reporter. 349 00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:05,789 Now, if she looks legit, send her to the alley behind the 350 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,707 Kozy Kat Klub at 2:00 AM tonight. 351 00:20:07,749 --> 00:20:09,501 And watch out for Lynch. 352 00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,961 -Don't worry about Colonel Geek. 353 00:20:12,003 --> 00:20:15,048 I'm going to slam-dunk that sucker. 354 00:20:15,090 --> 00:20:17,050 (INDIAN ACCENT) And may the Great Spirit watch over your 355 00:20:17,092 --> 00:20:18,927 refrigerator and keep it cold. 356 00:20:18,968 --> 00:20:20,804 World without end. 357 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,055 Adios! 358 00:20:22,097 --> 00:20:24,557 -I think he's getting worse. 359 00:20:24,599 --> 00:20:26,935 -Sorry, my mother was on the phone. 360 00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:36,069 -Your mother? 361 00:20:36,111 --> 00:20:37,737 On the file I got on you, 362 00:20:37,779 --> 00:20:39,698 it said that she died when you were five. 363 00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:40,824 -She did. 364 00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:42,742 But, uh, I had a line put in. 365 00:20:42,784 --> 00:20:44,536 You know, what a hassle! 366 00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:46,746 The telephone company, they don't cooperate. 367 00:20:46,788 --> 00:20:49,040 Took a while. But we're solid now. 368 00:20:49,082 --> 00:20:52,043 -So you never heard of the A-Team or any of these guys? 369 00:20:52,085 --> 00:20:54,629 -Look, I got problems, you know? 370 00:21:04,139 --> 00:21:06,016 -Mr. Murdock, what are you doing? 371 00:21:06,057 --> 00:21:07,934 -I'm shaving. 372 00:21:07,976 --> 00:21:10,145 Come on, haven't you ever seen a man shave in the morning? 373 00:21:13,023 --> 00:21:14,941 -I'm sorry what happened to you. 374 00:21:14,983 --> 00:21:17,068 Bye, Mr. Murdock. 375 00:21:20,905 --> 00:21:23,616 -The A-Team? 376 00:21:23,658 --> 00:21:26,911 Go to the alley behind the Kozy Kat Klub in 377 00:21:26,953 --> 00:21:29,122 Hollywood at 2:00 AM. 378 00:21:29,164 --> 00:21:31,249 And wait until you're contacted. 379 00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:43,053 [chanting, foreign language] 380 00:21:43,094 --> 00:21:44,971 -I have a hunch this Murdock character 381 00:21:45,013 --> 00:21:46,723 isn't anywhere near as crazy as he pretends. 382 00:21:46,765 --> 00:21:48,141 -He's not faking, Colonel. 383 00:21:48,183 --> 00:21:49,809 Mr. Murdock has paranoid anxiety delusions 384 00:21:49,851 --> 00:21:51,686 and intermittent memory loss. 385 00:21:51,728 --> 00:21:53,813 -Yes. Well, be that as it may, I'm going to press him hard 386 00:21:53,855 --> 00:21:55,565 and see what happens. I mean, that won't snap him now, will it? 387 00:21:55,607 --> 00:21:57,525 -No. He's usually a lot of fun. 388 00:21:57,567 --> 00:22:00,028 However, if he starts talking about "ammonia," that's a clue 389 00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:02,072 he may become violent. 390 00:22:05,116 --> 00:22:06,659 -Violent? 391 00:22:06,701 --> 00:22:08,745 -Hardly ever happens, but, ah, watch out. 392 00:22:08,787 --> 00:22:11,831 It's a trigger word for his aggressive cycle. 393 00:22:11,873 --> 00:22:13,041 -"Ammonia"? 394 00:22:17,128 --> 00:22:18,546 MURDOCK (OFFSCREEN): Where's my dog, Billy? 395 00:22:18,588 --> 00:22:20,006 You seen my dog down there? 396 00:22:20,048 --> 00:22:21,800 Hey, what you doing, man? 397 00:22:21,841 --> 00:22:24,177 Step off! Step off! Did you bring any candy? 398 00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:26,012 -Uhh, Mr. Murdock, get down from there. 399 00:22:26,054 --> 00:22:27,055 -From where? 400 00:22:27,097 --> 00:22:28,223 -Off the cabinet. 401 00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:29,974 -Don't worry about it, Nurse. 402 00:22:30,016 --> 00:22:31,726 Leave him up there. It doesn't bother me. 403 00:22:31,768 --> 00:22:34,854 I'll take it from here. Thank you. 404 00:22:34,896 --> 00:22:38,358 Well, who are we today? 405 00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:40,777 Harold Lloyd? King Kong? 406 00:22:40,819 --> 00:22:41,861 Napoleon's parrot? 407 00:22:41,903 --> 00:22:43,863 -I'm not nuts. 408 00:22:43,905 --> 00:22:45,740 I keep telling everybody. 409 00:22:45,782 --> 00:22:47,992 Don't you think I want to get out of here and see "E.T." 410 00:22:48,034 --> 00:22:49,786 just like everybody else? 411 00:22:49,828 --> 00:22:53,873 -I have a sneaky feeling that you're faking all this. 412 00:22:53,915 --> 00:22:56,835 -If you could prove that, I'd sure appreciate it because 413 00:22:56,876 --> 00:22:58,336 they think I'm loony tunes. 414 00:22:58,378 --> 00:23:00,213 And I keep telling 'em-- [grunts] 415 00:23:00,255 --> 00:23:02,674 I'm gonna hit you right alongside my head! 416 00:23:02,716 --> 00:23:04,092 (SINGING) Alouette, gentile Alouette. 417 00:23:04,134 --> 00:23:06,219 Alouette, je te plumerai. 418 00:23:06,261 --> 00:23:08,096 (ANGRILY) Get off my pants leg man, man! 419 00:23:08,138 --> 00:23:09,639 I tell you, I can't deal with you when you grab around my 420 00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:11,224 pants all the time. 421 00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:13,935 (NORMAL VOICE) Who's-- who's using garlic here. 422 00:23:13,977 --> 00:23:15,729 I'm sorry, what are we talking about? 423 00:23:15,770 --> 00:23:20,233 -Uh, we were, uh, we're talking about the fact that 424 00:23:20,275 --> 00:23:22,986 you flew the mission over the DMZ. 425 00:23:23,028 --> 00:23:24,821 You were the A-Team pilot in 'Nam. 426 00:23:24,863 --> 00:23:27,741 You dropped off Smith, Baracus, and Peck when they 427 00:23:27,782 --> 00:23:29,200 did their Hanoi bank job. 428 00:23:29,242 --> 00:23:30,910 And I think you're still working with them today! 429 00:23:30,952 --> 00:23:32,787 -Man, get off my leg, man! 430 00:23:32,829 --> 00:23:34,748 I can't stand it when you touch me like that. 431 00:23:34,789 --> 00:23:35,999 Watch out! 432 00:23:36,041 --> 00:23:39,085 (WHISPERS) It's ammonia. They-- 433 00:23:39,127 --> 00:23:44,007 they use it on the floors and it eats through 434 00:23:44,049 --> 00:23:47,010 the soles of your shoes. 435 00:23:47,052 --> 00:23:48,762 (WHIMPERS) And burns your feet. 436 00:23:48,803 --> 00:23:50,305 -Come on-- 437 00:23:50,347 --> 00:23:52,932 -Why do you think I'm sitting on top of this dresser? 438 00:23:52,974 --> 00:23:55,935 I'm not up here for the fresh air. 439 00:23:55,977 --> 00:23:58,271 -What happened to your head? 440 00:23:58,313 --> 00:24:02,233 -Well, they hook you up to this machine and give you a-- 441 00:24:02,275 --> 00:24:05,820 [clap] a zapperoo in the old noggin. 442 00:24:05,862 --> 00:24:07,280 -Electric shock therapy? 443 00:24:07,322 --> 00:24:10,825 -Can you smell it? 444 00:24:10,867 --> 00:24:12,952 Ammonia! 445 00:24:12,994 --> 00:24:15,955 It's on everything. And I hate ammonia. 446 00:24:15,997 --> 00:24:17,165 I hate everything. 447 00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:19,793 I hate this dresser, my straitjacket. 448 00:24:19,834 --> 00:24:21,002 And I hate you! 449 00:24:21,044 --> 00:24:22,962 Aw, god! 450 00:24:23,004 --> 00:24:25,757 Ooh, hoo! 451 00:24:25,799 --> 00:24:28,134 -Murdock, I didn't mean to trouble you. 452 00:24:28,176 --> 00:24:30,470 -Colonel. 453 00:24:30,512 --> 00:24:32,972 -Take care of yourself, son. 454 00:24:34,349 --> 00:24:35,850 -[chuckles] 455 00:24:39,354 --> 00:24:41,189 -You really ought to see his record. 456 00:24:41,231 --> 00:24:44,192 Man flew everything from jets to choppers. 457 00:24:44,234 --> 00:24:46,945 He was in the Thunderbirds before the war. 458 00:24:46,986 --> 00:24:51,032 One of the best combat pilots in 'Nam, snapped. 459 00:24:51,074 --> 00:24:52,992 No doubt about it. 460 00:24:53,034 --> 00:24:54,953 [exhales sharply] 461 00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:57,831 OK, we've got one lead left. 462 00:24:57,872 --> 00:25:00,208 That's the girl that called the Veterans Administration 463 00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:02,002 trying to get a line on Hannibal Smith. 464 00:25:02,043 --> 00:25:04,045 -Amy Allen, a newspaper lady. 465 00:25:04,087 --> 00:25:06,089 I think she was just hunting up a story, like that guy last year. 466 00:25:06,131 --> 00:25:07,424 -Well, maybe. Stake her out. 467 00:25:07,465 --> 00:25:09,009 She's the only lead we've got left 468 00:25:09,050 --> 00:25:10,719 and I want to know where she is every minute. 469 00:25:33,283 --> 00:25:34,367 [thump] 470 00:25:34,409 --> 00:25:36,202 -Hello? Is anybody there? 471 00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:43,335 Are you all right? 472 00:25:43,376 --> 00:25:44,961 -[grunting] 473 00:25:48,923 --> 00:25:51,134 [glass breaks] 474 00:25:51,176 --> 00:25:55,055 -That was almost a full bottle. 475 00:25:57,098 --> 00:25:59,059 -Where do you live? 476 00:25:59,100 --> 00:26:03,063 -In a box in the alley. 477 00:26:03,104 --> 00:26:05,899 -Wait! 478 00:26:05,940 --> 00:26:09,069 Wait, here. 479 00:26:09,110 --> 00:26:10,570 Take this. 480 00:26:10,612 --> 00:26:13,365 Spend it on food or something, please. 481 00:26:19,079 --> 00:26:23,541 -You are a princess in a world of dragons. 482 00:26:56,241 --> 00:26:58,410 -[breathes deeply] 483 00:27:12,966 --> 00:27:15,343 I like your style, Ms. Allen. 484 00:27:15,385 --> 00:27:19,389 Now, if you can pass Mr. Lee's test, you hired the A-Team. 485 00:27:31,276 --> 00:27:32,444 [rapping] 486 00:27:32,485 --> 00:27:34,029 -No park here! 487 00:27:34,070 --> 00:27:35,363 -People's coming! -What? 488 00:27:35,405 --> 00:27:37,407 -You no park here. Must leave. Must go! 489 00:27:37,449 --> 00:27:39,451 Law say, no park here. 490 00:27:39,492 --> 00:27:41,369 -Please don't yell at people. 491 00:27:41,411 --> 00:27:44,080 -Yellow people? You no like yellow people? 492 00:27:44,122 --> 00:27:46,416 -No, not "yellow people," yell "at" people. 493 00:27:46,458 --> 00:27:50,045 Don't yell at me, OK? I have a terrible headache. 494 00:27:50,086 --> 00:27:51,296 -You don't park here. You go! 495 00:27:51,338 --> 00:27:53,298 -OK, OK. I'll move it. 496 00:27:53,340 --> 00:27:55,133 What time is it? 497 00:27:55,175 --> 00:27:58,470 -Garden bone-- seven and a half. 498 00:27:58,511 --> 00:28:00,138 -Wouldn't happen to have any aspirin? 499 00:28:00,180 --> 00:28:01,473 I'll pay for it. 500 00:28:01,514 --> 00:28:02,807 -You come, I fix. 501 00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:05,143 -Wha-- what about the car? 502 00:28:05,185 --> 00:28:09,689 -The Master say, "Only the very wisest and the very 503 00:28:09,731 --> 00:28:12,650 stupidest cannot change." 504 00:28:12,692 --> 00:28:14,361 -Confucius? Great. 505 00:28:14,402 --> 00:28:16,196 Just what I need to go along with this headache. 506 00:28:29,751 --> 00:28:32,504 -Thank you. 507 00:28:32,545 --> 00:28:34,422 -You look for A-Team. 508 00:28:36,216 --> 00:28:37,342 -What do you know about them? 509 00:28:37,384 --> 00:28:39,469 -Many Chinese in Vietnam-- 510 00:28:39,511 --> 00:28:42,389 many peoples know A-Team. 511 00:28:42,430 --> 00:28:44,349 -A friend of mine disappeared in-- 512 00:28:44,391 --> 00:28:48,144 -A-Team know. 513 00:28:48,186 --> 00:28:52,357 How much money Missy got? 514 00:28:52,399 --> 00:28:55,110 -I have a house, stocks, and bonds. 515 00:28:55,151 --> 00:28:56,361 -Hm-mm. 516 00:28:56,403 --> 00:28:59,114 -I could raise about $150,000. 517 00:28:59,155 --> 00:29:00,156 -No is enough. 518 00:29:00,198 --> 00:29:02,200 A-Team cost more. 519 00:29:02,242 --> 00:29:03,535 -More? 520 00:29:03,576 --> 00:29:05,078 Who do these guys think they are? 521 00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:06,705 You got to be kidding me! More than that? 522 00:29:06,746 --> 00:29:11,626 -The Master say, "Women and people of low birth are hard 523 00:29:11,668 --> 00:29:13,253 to deal with." 524 00:29:13,294 --> 00:29:15,213 -I can't wait to pass that along. 525 00:29:15,255 --> 00:29:17,382 -Oh, how much life worth? 526 00:29:17,424 --> 00:29:20,218 How much A. Massey life worth? 527 00:29:20,260 --> 00:29:21,761 -Everything I own. 528 00:29:24,431 --> 00:29:26,099 -You get money. 529 00:29:26,141 --> 00:29:27,726 Bring A. Massey picture. 530 00:29:27,767 --> 00:29:31,438 You no hear from me in two day, is no deal. 531 00:29:33,314 --> 00:29:34,399 Goodbye, Missy. 532 00:29:34,441 --> 00:29:35,400 -Mr. Lee-- 533 00:29:35,442 --> 00:29:36,776 -Goodbye. 534 00:29:50,457 --> 00:29:51,833 Whew. 535 00:30:03,636 --> 00:30:05,597 -You're late, my boy. 536 00:30:05,638 --> 00:30:09,225 I was wondering if you forgot. 537 00:30:09,267 --> 00:30:11,644 Come closer, I can't see 'ya. 538 00:30:14,481 --> 00:30:16,441 What is that that you're wearing? 539 00:30:16,483 --> 00:30:18,568 Is it a clerical collar? 540 00:30:18,610 --> 00:30:20,445 -They won't let anybody in to see you unless they're from 541 00:30:20,487 --> 00:30:22,280 your parish or your doctors. 542 00:30:22,322 --> 00:30:25,241 -So you run off and you steal a clerical collar, huh? 543 00:30:25,283 --> 00:30:26,951 [chuckles] 544 00:30:26,993 --> 00:30:30,497 Ah, you've been a project of my life ever since you 545 00:30:30,538 --> 00:30:33,875 wandered in off the streets, five years old-- 546 00:30:33,917 --> 00:30:35,752 no home, no family. 547 00:30:35,794 --> 00:30:38,630 But you did keep all us old goats at the orphanage on our 548 00:30:38,672 --> 00:30:40,465 toes, that you did. 549 00:30:40,507 --> 00:30:42,717 I've been giving you a great deal of thought. 550 00:30:42,759 --> 00:30:46,596 First, you're orphaned by your parents, then by your country. 551 00:30:46,638 --> 00:30:49,683 Now, you spend your Saturdays in here with me. 552 00:30:49,724 --> 00:30:52,560 You've got to invest in yourself, son. 553 00:30:52,602 --> 00:30:54,604 -I want to get back. 554 00:30:54,646 --> 00:30:56,898 I'm tired of running. 555 00:30:56,940 --> 00:30:58,692 I'd like to have a family. 556 00:30:58,733 --> 00:31:00,652 But you can't do that with the government on your tail. 557 00:31:00,694 --> 00:31:03,697 So in the meantime, I'll be satisfied just to survive. 558 00:31:03,738 --> 00:31:06,366 RADIO ANNOUNCER : --so now we join "Psychology Chat Back" 559 00:31:06,408 --> 00:31:08,410 with Dr. Toni Pace. 560 00:31:08,451 --> 00:31:09,869 TONI ON RADIO: Hi there. 561 00:31:09,911 --> 00:31:12,497 Our first caller is Carl from Covina. 562 00:31:12,539 --> 00:31:14,207 How're you doing, Carl? 563 00:31:14,249 --> 00:31:15,792 -Well, Toni, [sniffs] 564 00:31:15,834 --> 00:31:17,752 I'd like to say I'm doing fine. 565 00:31:17,794 --> 00:31:22,382 But this month is really strange for me. 566 00:31:22,424 --> 00:31:26,344 -Carl from Covina, Carl from Covina-- 567 00:31:26,386 --> 00:31:28,346 TONI ON RADIO: Why don't you tell me about it? 568 00:31:28,388 --> 00:31:30,348 HANNIBAL ON RADIO: Well-- 569 00:31:30,390 --> 00:31:32,851 -Mexico. Who wants to go to Mexico? 570 00:31:32,892 --> 00:31:36,021 -Well, I moved back in with my younger sister. 571 00:31:36,062 --> 00:31:37,605 -Client's a woman. 572 00:31:37,647 --> 00:31:39,232 TONI ON RADIO: How old is your sister, Carl? 573 00:31:39,274 --> 00:31:40,650 -She's 25. 574 00:31:40,692 --> 00:31:43,278 She's always been very assertive. 575 00:31:43,319 --> 00:31:44,696 And I-- 576 00:31:44,738 --> 00:31:48,575 well, I just hate confrontation. 577 00:31:48,616 --> 00:31:49,701 -Sure you do, Hannibal. 578 00:31:49,743 --> 00:31:51,536 -Who's Hannibal, man? 579 00:31:51,578 --> 00:31:52,579 -You don't know, Hannibal? 580 00:31:52,620 --> 00:31:54,247 Did you go to school? 581 00:31:54,289 --> 00:31:55,331 Don't they teach you anything about 582 00:31:55,373 --> 00:31:56,332 Hannibal and them elephants? 583 00:31:56,374 --> 00:31:57,709 -Not yet. 584 00:31:57,751 --> 00:31:59,669 -Hannibal was a Carthaginian commander. 585 00:31:59,711 --> 00:32:01,629 He took his army over the Alps into Italy. 586 00:32:01,671 --> 00:32:04,382 He used elephants to carry his equipment. 587 00:32:04,424 --> 00:32:06,426 Nobody thought you could take an army over the Alps. 588 00:32:06,468 --> 00:32:08,303 But Hannibal did. 589 00:32:08,345 --> 00:32:10,680 Caught the Romans sleeping and beat them up. 590 00:32:10,722 --> 00:32:12,265 TONI ON RADIO: It's your life, Carl. 591 00:32:12,307 --> 00:32:13,725 What do you think you should do? 592 00:32:13,767 --> 00:32:17,687 -Well, I know this race driver. 593 00:32:17,729 --> 00:32:21,733 And I thought I could call him and have him pick me up at 594 00:32:21,775 --> 00:32:24,569 3:00 this afternoon and-- 595 00:32:24,611 --> 00:32:26,279 -Got to get. 596 00:32:26,321 --> 00:32:28,031 Got to pick up a friend at 3:00. 597 00:32:28,073 --> 00:32:30,617 -Sure like to meet a guy like Hannibal. 598 00:32:30,658 --> 00:32:32,577 -Yeah, he's a piece of work, all right. 599 00:32:32,619 --> 00:32:34,329 I may be gone for a couple of days. 600 00:32:34,371 --> 00:32:35,580 [boys groan] 601 00:32:35,622 --> 00:32:37,540 -Oh, fellas, I got to make a living. 602 00:32:37,582 --> 00:32:39,417 So I'll see you maybe next week. 603 00:32:39,459 --> 00:32:40,669 Don't steal no hubcaps. 604 00:32:40,710 --> 00:32:42,671 -We'll try. 605 00:32:42,712 --> 00:32:46,383 - --did not ask my sister's permission or nothing. 606 00:32:46,424 --> 00:32:48,760 TONI ON RADIO: Be firm. Don't let her run your life. 607 00:32:48,802 --> 00:32:50,804 You run it. Say it like you mean it. 608 00:32:50,845 --> 00:32:53,973 And most people will do whatever you want. 609 00:32:54,015 --> 00:32:56,393 -I'm surprised the Surgeon General let me out. 610 00:32:56,434 --> 00:32:57,686 -He didn't. I did. 611 00:32:57,727 --> 00:32:58,770 I had to bring your Uncle Deke into town. 612 00:32:58,812 --> 00:32:59,938 -How is Uncle Deke? 613 00:32:59,979 --> 00:33:01,064 -You don't have an Uncle Deke. 614 00:33:01,106 --> 00:33:02,482 -I'm sorry to hear about that. 615 00:33:02,524 --> 00:33:03,858 I was just beginning to like him. 616 00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:05,694 -Hm-mm. You hated him. He used to beat you. 617 00:33:05,735 --> 00:33:07,487 -That creep! 618 00:33:09,155 --> 00:33:10,949 Where did you get the parade float? 619 00:33:10,990 --> 00:33:12,992 -I scrounged it up Cactus Jack Perkins, the rodeo rider. 620 00:33:13,034 --> 00:33:15,620 He thinks I'm doing a ring job on it over the weekend. 621 00:33:15,662 --> 00:33:17,539 Hey, I got us a Gulfstream. Can you fly it? 622 00:33:17,580 --> 00:33:18,957 -Hey, brother, if it's got wings, I can fly it. 623 00:33:18,998 --> 00:33:20,834 -Great. 624 00:33:20,875 --> 00:33:22,836 -Hey, Face, what's a Gulfstream? 625 00:33:33,805 --> 00:33:35,849 [engine revs] 626 00:33:38,768 --> 00:33:40,729 [tires screech] 627 00:33:40,770 --> 00:33:43,481 -Amy Allen, I'm Hannibal Smith. 628 00:33:43,523 --> 00:33:45,734 I understand you want to hire the A-Team. 629 00:33:45,775 --> 00:33:47,444 -Hm. 630 00:33:47,485 --> 00:33:48,653 -We'll take the job. 631 00:33:48,695 --> 00:33:49,738 You got the money and the picture? 632 00:33:49,779 --> 00:33:50,739 -Yeah. 633 00:33:50,780 --> 00:33:51,740 -Give it to me. 634 00:33:51,781 --> 00:33:52,741 -Later. 635 00:33:52,782 --> 00:33:53,825 -You want to go to Mexico? 636 00:33:53,867 --> 00:33:55,702 -You got it. 637 00:34:01,666 --> 00:34:03,168 Right now? I'm not packed. 638 00:34:03,209 --> 00:34:04,836 What about my car? What about all this stuff? 639 00:34:04,878 --> 00:34:06,629 -Lock it and leave it. We're leaving. 640 00:34:06,671 --> 00:34:08,089 You got five seconds. 641 00:34:14,637 --> 00:34:19,017 Ms. Amy Allen, may I present Bosco Baracus, B.A. 642 00:34:19,059 --> 00:34:21,394 Don't, ah, worry about it. 643 00:34:21,436 --> 00:34:23,480 He's got a bad attitude. But he'll grow on you. 644 00:34:23,521 --> 00:34:25,690 Let's go, B.A. 645 00:34:25,732 --> 00:34:27,567 [tires screech] 646 00:34:31,029 --> 00:34:33,406 -Colonel Lynch, this is Mark, I made him. 647 00:34:33,448 --> 00:34:34,699 He just picked a girl up in the garage 648 00:34:34,741 --> 00:34:36,117 of the Courier Express. 649 00:34:39,913 --> 00:34:41,915 -Stay on him. 650 00:34:41,956 --> 00:34:43,917 Vector me in. 651 00:34:43,958 --> 00:34:47,545 Don't let him spot you. I'm on my way with troops. 652 00:34:49,047 --> 00:34:50,632 Kids. 653 00:35:03,645 --> 00:35:05,438 [horn honks] 654 00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:07,524 -I've been laying the groundwork on this plane deal 655 00:35:07,565 --> 00:35:10,110 for two months. Just keep your mouth shut. 656 00:35:10,151 --> 00:35:12,570 -Jo Bob Jamison. [chuckles] 657 00:35:12,612 --> 00:35:14,406 -Howdy, Avon. 658 00:35:14,447 --> 00:35:15,699 -I thought you and your daddy Hank 659 00:35:15,740 --> 00:35:17,492 had bought that Lear up in Santa Barbara. 660 00:35:17,534 --> 00:35:19,411 -Now, before we start yammering away here on all 661 00:35:19,452 --> 00:35:23,206 these business details, I want you to meet my personal pilot. 662 00:35:23,248 --> 00:35:25,750 This here's a feller by the name of Buster Hawthorne. 663 00:35:25,792 --> 00:35:28,211 Buster, could you give Avon a big old howdy? 664 00:35:28,253 --> 00:35:30,588 -(EMOTIONLESS) Big howdy. 665 00:35:30,630 --> 00:35:33,967 -Hey, say, Buster, why don't you, ah, mosey on over there 666 00:35:34,009 --> 00:35:35,969 and take a real good look at that Gulfstream? 667 00:35:36,011 --> 00:35:37,721 We're going to see if Avon and Jo Bob 668 00:35:37,762 --> 00:35:40,473 are going to be able to cut us a calf, here. 669 00:35:40,515 --> 00:35:42,517 -So tell me what happened to the Lear? 670 00:35:42,559 --> 00:35:44,686 -Oh, well, [chuckles] 671 00:35:44,728 --> 00:35:46,396 this is going to give you a big yahoo. 672 00:35:46,438 --> 00:35:48,273 All right. 673 00:35:48,314 --> 00:35:50,191 I get that little sucker on home to Texas. 674 00:35:50,233 --> 00:35:54,070 Daddy Hank, he gets in. He sits down, he's all excited. 675 00:35:54,112 --> 00:35:56,364 And I'll be damned if his Stetson doesn't-- bang! 676 00:35:56,406 --> 00:35:58,283 Right up against the top of that cabin. 677 00:35:58,324 --> 00:36:00,452 Honey, he was madder than a hornet's nest in a rainstorm. 678 00:36:00,493 --> 00:36:02,120 I mean, it was likely to drive him nuts! 679 00:36:02,162 --> 00:36:04,122 So he says to me, Jo Bob-- he calls me Jo Bob. 680 00:36:04,164 --> 00:36:06,332 He said, Jo Bob! You get back on out there 681 00:36:06,374 --> 00:36:10,295 and get me that Gulfstream you was telling me about! So, here I am. 682 00:36:10,337 --> 00:36:12,297 -Well, we can make a deal. 683 00:36:12,339 --> 00:36:14,466 -That's mighty nice! You know what I was thinking, though? 684 00:36:14,507 --> 00:36:17,052 I thought, if I can test fly that little sucker on down to Houston, 685 00:36:17,093 --> 00:36:18,720 Daddy Hank-- I call him Daddy Hank. 686 00:36:18,762 --> 00:36:21,139 He's down there horse trading some hotels and such. 687 00:36:21,181 --> 00:36:24,434 If I could just fly him around over the weekend and just make 688 00:36:24,476 --> 00:36:26,811 sure he ain't going to have no problems with this thing-- oh, Lord! 689 00:36:26,853 --> 00:36:29,356 I hate to have him knock his hat off in the john. 690 00:36:29,397 --> 00:36:31,483 -I'll just make up the sales agreement. 691 00:36:31,524 --> 00:36:33,651 -Now, listen here. I'm a rude man. 692 00:36:33,693 --> 00:36:35,695 Y'all want a check or something, a little deposit? 693 00:36:35,737 --> 00:36:39,366 -Oh, no. Your credit is OK with us, Jo Bob. 694 00:36:39,407 --> 00:36:41,576 -You keep talking like that, I'm gonna take you with me. 695 00:36:41,618 --> 00:36:43,328 -Where are we going? 696 00:36:43,370 --> 00:36:44,788 -Keep on going, we're going to turn right up there. 697 00:36:44,829 --> 00:36:46,539 -I ain't going to no airport, Hannibal. 698 00:36:46,581 --> 00:36:48,708 I ain't going to fly with that crazy fool, Murdock. 699 00:36:50,752 --> 00:36:52,462 -Did I mention Murdock? 700 00:36:52,504 --> 00:36:53,838 -Murdock? 701 00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:55,507 -We're not going to the airport, B.A. 702 00:36:55,548 --> 00:36:57,342 -Isn't Murdock kind of crazy? 703 00:36:57,384 --> 00:36:59,594 -If he's flying, then we are dying. 704 00:36:59,636 --> 00:37:01,221 -[chuckles] 705 00:37:04,849 --> 00:37:07,102 Turn right, right up there. 706 00:37:19,364 --> 00:37:21,199 -What you doing, sucker? 707 00:37:21,241 --> 00:37:24,160 -I think I'll get out for a minute. 708 00:37:24,202 --> 00:37:26,371 -What's going on here? 709 00:37:26,413 --> 00:37:29,708 This road leads directly to the airport, Hannibal. 710 00:37:29,749 --> 00:37:33,086 -This road is nowhere near the airport. 711 00:37:33,128 --> 00:37:36,756 [airplane zooming] 712 00:37:36,798 --> 00:37:39,551 -What's going on? Will somebody please tell me what's going on? 713 00:37:39,592 --> 00:37:42,887 -You lied to me. 714 00:37:42,929 --> 00:37:45,724 -Lied? Me? 715 00:37:45,765 --> 00:37:48,393 [airplane zooming] 716 00:37:52,605 --> 00:37:54,816 -I told you what I was going to do to you next time you try 717 00:37:54,858 --> 00:37:56,317 to take me on the airplane, didn't I? 718 00:37:56,359 --> 00:37:57,652 -Please, what is going on? 719 00:37:57,694 --> 00:37:59,362 -Now, B.A., 720 00:37:59,404 --> 00:38:01,656 you're going to have one of your anxiety blackouts. 721 00:38:03,908 --> 00:38:07,579 -Now, now, take it easy, B.A. Take it easy. 722 00:38:07,620 --> 00:38:09,748 -[grunts] 723 00:38:09,789 --> 00:38:11,207 -Why did he hit you? 724 00:38:11,249 --> 00:38:12,584 -Hit me? 725 00:38:12,625 --> 00:38:16,588 If he hit me, I'd be in the hospital. 726 00:38:16,629 --> 00:38:19,549 -Colonel Lynch, it looks like they're headed towards the airport. 727 00:38:19,591 --> 00:38:21,676 LYNCH (OFFSCREEN): I'm almost there. I'm on my way with troops. 728 00:38:24,804 --> 00:38:26,723 -They're over there. 729 00:38:26,765 --> 00:38:28,808 [tires screeching] 730 00:38:31,811 --> 00:38:33,772 -Here we are. There they are. 731 00:38:33,813 --> 00:38:35,774 I love it when a plan comes together. 732 00:38:35,815 --> 00:38:38,610 Get behind him and push. 733 00:38:38,651 --> 00:38:40,945 Wait a minute, let me get his foot. 734 00:38:40,987 --> 00:38:43,740 -You have to do this every time he flies? 735 00:38:43,782 --> 00:38:45,950 -Yeah. He's afraid of flying. Kind of silly, isn't it? 736 00:38:45,992 --> 00:38:48,203 -Uh! It's a notch or two past silly. 737 00:38:48,244 --> 00:38:49,788 This is ridiculous! 738 00:38:49,829 --> 00:38:52,499 -Ah! Get the luggage, kid. 739 00:38:56,836 --> 00:38:59,339 [tires screeching] 740 00:38:59,381 --> 00:39:00,882 -Who is that? 741 00:39:00,924 --> 00:39:03,802 -Oh, that. That's nothing. 742 00:39:03,843 --> 00:39:05,595 File it under "old business." 743 00:39:05,637 --> 00:39:07,514 [car engine revs] 744 00:39:11,434 --> 00:39:13,603 -Welcome to Air Chance. Sorry, we're all out of kosher dinners. 745 00:39:13,645 --> 00:39:14,688 -Lynch is coming. 746 00:39:14,729 --> 00:39:16,856 -Murdock! 747 00:39:20,860 --> 00:39:23,530 Lynch is right behind us, baby, get the clearance. 748 00:39:30,578 --> 00:39:31,746 Got him. 749 00:39:31,788 --> 00:39:34,874 -OK, Murdock, go! 750 00:39:41,464 --> 00:39:43,550 [police sirens blaring] 751 00:40:11,995 --> 00:40:14,039 -Hannibal wanted me to tell you we're headed to Acapulco. 752 00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:16,374 -I don't have no flight plans to Mexico. 753 00:40:16,416 --> 00:40:18,418 I could follow up the coast. But we don't have enough fuel. 754 00:40:18,460 --> 00:40:19,878 It's better if I swing by the airport 755 00:40:19,919 --> 00:40:21,755 and try to pick up a flight and follow it down. 756 00:40:21,796 --> 00:40:24,799 -Look, I have a 3:30 757 00:40:24,841 --> 00:40:27,469 Aeronaves de Mexico into Acapulco. 758 00:40:27,510 --> 00:40:31,765 And I have a 4:10 Western. 759 00:40:31,806 --> 00:40:33,433 They're both out of LAX. 760 00:40:33,475 --> 00:40:34,642 -(MEXICAN ACCENT) I think that we'll go 761 00:40:34,684 --> 00:40:36,895 4:10 Western to Acapulco. 762 00:40:36,936 --> 00:40:40,023 They're big, red and white ones. They're easier to see. 763 00:40:40,065 --> 00:40:42,609 And their pilots don't mind if you hitchhike. 764 00:40:44,861 --> 00:40:46,738 -[exhales sharply] 765 00:40:46,780 --> 00:40:49,032 -Excuse me, but what are you doing? 766 00:40:49,074 --> 00:40:52,035 -We're tying him up so he won't kill us if he comes to. 767 00:40:52,077 --> 00:40:53,953 -I see. 768 00:40:56,539 --> 00:40:58,833 Excuse me, again. But isn't he one of you? 769 00:40:58,875 --> 00:41:01,086 I mean, isn't he on the team? -Yes. 770 00:41:01,127 --> 00:41:02,587 -So then, why do you have to drug him? 771 00:41:02,629 --> 00:41:03,922 -He hates the pilot. 772 00:41:03,963 --> 00:41:05,757 -Hates the pilot, why? 773 00:41:05,799 --> 00:41:07,634 -Because our pilot is insane. 774 00:41:07,676 --> 00:41:11,471 -So he's up there now, flying us? 775 00:41:11,513 --> 00:41:12,764 -Yes. 776 00:41:12,806 --> 00:41:17,352 -[singing in Spanish] 777 00:41:23,983 --> 00:41:25,944 -[laughs sheepishly] 778 00:41:25,985 --> 00:41:27,946 What a kidder! 779 00:41:27,987 --> 00:41:30,573 -I'm not sure you are exactly what I bargained for. 780 00:41:30,615 --> 00:41:32,575 -Let's get something straight right now. 781 00:41:32,617 --> 00:41:34,786 You want your friend back. 782 00:41:34,828 --> 00:41:36,621 The authorities shined you on. 783 00:41:36,663 --> 00:41:39,499 So you went out and hired a bunch of gunfighters. 784 00:41:39,541 --> 00:41:41,960 Now, if you wanted somebody with good manners, 785 00:41:42,002 --> 00:41:43,962 you should have hired an English butler. 786 00:41:44,004 --> 00:41:45,964 -The pilot's really insane? 787 00:41:46,006 --> 00:41:48,091 -We think so. 788 00:41:48,133 --> 00:41:50,635 -Are you still being chased by the government? 789 00:41:50,677 --> 00:41:52,846 -That's right. -What I don't understand 790 00:41:52,887 --> 00:41:54,931 is why you aren't all living in Switzerland where it's safe? 791 00:41:54,973 --> 00:41:58,101 -Because we're not Swiss. We're Americans. 792 00:41:58,143 --> 00:42:00,103 We've got a little problem right now. 793 00:42:00,145 --> 00:42:02,814 But we'll work our way out of it somehow. 794 00:42:02,856 --> 00:42:04,816 In the meantime, we stick together 795 00:42:04,858 --> 00:42:06,985 and do what we do best. 796 00:42:07,027 --> 00:42:12,490 Now, Mr. Lee said you had $150,000 to finance this... 797 00:42:16,745 --> 00:42:19,748 operation, right? 798 00:42:19,789 --> 00:42:20,999 -The bank was closed. 799 00:42:21,041 --> 00:42:23,543 I borrowed all I could. 800 00:42:23,585 --> 00:42:26,755 -25,000 and change. 801 00:42:26,796 --> 00:42:28,757 -You came up a little short, honey. 802 00:42:28,798 --> 00:42:30,884 25,000 won't keep us in jet fuel. 803 00:42:30,925 --> 00:42:33,845 I think you ought to turn around and call it off. 804 00:42:33,887 --> 00:42:35,847 -Mr. Smith, I'm sorry. 805 00:42:35,889 --> 00:42:37,766 I couldn't get the money fast enough. 806 00:42:37,807 --> 00:42:40,852 Mr. Lee said he would call and give me advance warning. 807 00:42:40,894 --> 00:42:42,020 -That isn't what he said. 808 00:42:42,062 --> 00:42:43,021 -How do you know? 809 00:42:43,063 --> 00:42:44,606 You weren't there. 810 00:42:44,647 --> 00:42:46,858 He was spouting proverbs all over the place. 811 00:42:46,900 --> 00:42:48,860 I couldn't understand him. 812 00:42:48,902 --> 00:42:50,695 -We could start the movie company again. 813 00:42:50,737 --> 00:42:52,614 Promote the stuff we need from the Film Commission. 814 00:42:52,655 --> 00:42:54,574 -That's always such a big hassle. 815 00:42:54,616 --> 00:42:57,869 -I promise, you will get the money when we get back! 816 00:42:57,911 --> 00:42:59,579 My word is good. 817 00:43:03,625 --> 00:43:06,795 "Women and people of high birth are very trustworthy." 818 00:43:06,836 --> 00:43:09,005 -(CHINESE ACCENT) The Master say, 819 00:43:09,047 --> 00:43:13,593 "Woman and people of low birth are hard to deal with." 820 00:43:23,728 --> 00:43:25,772 [theme music] 58196

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