Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,773 --> 00:00:03,873
Ah.
2
00:00:03,874 --> 00:00:05,441
Timmy, what are you
doing in my office?
3
00:00:05,442 --> 00:00:07,076
Oh, I just dropped a little
gift on your desk, sir.
4
00:00:07,077 --> 00:00:11,881
Aw, you're like the
fourth assistant to do that.
5
00:00:11,882 --> 00:00:15,318
And you wrapped it?
Well, there's a new twist.
6
00:00:15,319 --> 00:00:17,353
Sir, while the thought
had crossed my mind,
7
00:00:17,354 --> 00:00:19,622
this gift was in fact
sent by your mother.
8
00:00:19,623 --> 00:00:20,673
Oh, it was?
9
00:00:20,674 --> 00:00:23,559
Oh, she's coming to town. Yay.
10
00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:25,862
I was surprised
that you had a mother.
11
00:00:25,863 --> 00:00:28,264
I didn't imagine you
coming from human flesh.
12
00:00:28,265 --> 00:00:33,436
Yeah, well she's more
plastic than flesh now.
13
00:00:33,437 --> 00:00:36,239
A book, that sucks.
14
00:00:36,240 --> 00:00:39,175
Ah, a paintball gun.
Yeah, boy!
15
00:00:39,176 --> 00:00:41,644
I like this one.
I just need something to shoot.
16
00:00:41,645 --> 00:00:44,781
Ooh, put this on your head.
17
00:00:44,782 --> 00:00:47,417
Sir, just how stupid
do you think I am?
18
00:00:47,418 --> 00:00:50,620
What's up, guys?
19
00:00:50,621 --> 00:00:51,621
Mr. Rhodes,
would you please
20
00:00:51,622 --> 00:00:54,724
place this on your head?
21
00:00:54,725 --> 00:00:57,460
Can do.
22
00:00:59,563 --> 00:01:02,732
[Paintballs firing]
23
00:01:09,006 --> 00:01:10,973
He totally missed the book.
24
00:01:40,414 --> 00:01:42,882
All right, babe, have fun.
25
00:01:42,883 --> 00:01:44,650
Jen says hey from Philadelphia.
26
00:01:44,651 --> 00:01:46,686
Ah, she gets
cell phone reception
27
00:01:46,687 --> 00:01:50,256
in the eagles' locker room?
28
00:01:50,257 --> 00:01:51,324
Funny.
29
00:01:51,325 --> 00:01:52,692
Yeah, she's
visiting college friends.
30
00:01:52,693 --> 00:01:57,230
Jen went to college
in the eagles' locker room?
31
00:01:57,231 --> 00:01:58,898
Another good one.
32
00:01:58,899 --> 00:02:00,132
Heh, heh.
33
00:02:00,133 --> 00:02:01,801
So are you guys ready
for my big guys' night?
34
00:02:01,802 --> 00:02:04,003
Uh, sorry, other plans.
35
00:02:04,004 --> 00:02:05,004
Yeah, same here.
36
00:02:05,005 --> 00:02:06,439
No, but I've got three dips.
37
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:10,710
And one's got seven layers.
That's like ten dips.
38
00:02:10,711 --> 00:02:12,011
Look, I don't know
how to say this,
39
00:02:12,012 --> 00:02:13,946
but your guys' night's
gonna blow.
40
00:02:13,947 --> 00:02:16,415
You did know how to say it.
41
00:02:16,416 --> 00:02:18,817
- Okay you know what,
you guys are dis-invited,
42
00:02:18,818 --> 00:02:20,219
- I don't need you.
- Whoa.
43
00:02:20,220 --> 00:02:21,454
Who are you gonna have?
44
00:02:21,455 --> 00:02:24,123
Who?
Who am I not gonna have.
45
00:02:24,124 --> 00:02:25,925
My place is gonna be
wall-to-wall dudes,
46
00:02:25,926 --> 00:02:28,160
and you two are gonna miss it.
47
00:02:29,463 --> 00:02:31,597
All right,
so what do you think?
48
00:02:31,598 --> 00:02:33,466
You look like
Barney with boobs.
49
00:02:38,889 --> 00:02:41,407
We're interviewing possible
surrogate candidates today.
50
00:02:41,408 --> 00:02:43,576
And we're gonna find one.
51
00:02:43,577 --> 00:02:45,444
We're gonna finally
get this whole deal started.
52
00:02:45,445 --> 00:02:46,979
Yup, by the end of the day,
53
00:02:46,980 --> 00:02:49,448
we may know
who's gonna carry our child.
54
00:02:49,449 --> 00:02:51,984
Oh, and there's more big news.
55
00:02:51,985 --> 00:02:56,489
My softball banquet is tonight.
56
00:02:56,490 --> 00:02:58,908
Right, which is
equally important.
57
00:02:58,909 --> 00:03:01,060
The MVP vote is tonight.
58
00:03:01,061 --> 00:03:02,061
It's between me and Brenda.
59
00:03:02,062 --> 00:03:03,529
Brenda.
60
00:03:03,530 --> 00:03:05,765
How can a girl
be that good at softball?
61
00:03:05,766 --> 00:03:08,250
She's a lesbian.
62
00:03:08,251 --> 00:03:09,468
When we're
interviewing the surrogates,
63
00:03:09,469 --> 00:03:11,537
could you please try to
think before you talk?
64
00:03:11,538 --> 00:03:12,571
Fine.
65
00:03:12,572 --> 00:03:13,539
But all I know is,
at that banquet tonight,
66
00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:17,376
that lesbian is going down.
67
00:03:22,316 --> 00:03:23,382
Oh, yo, yo.
68
00:03:23,383 --> 00:03:25,484
Timmy-limmy-ding-dong!
69
00:03:25,485 --> 00:03:27,586
Did you get my message
about guys' night?
70
00:03:27,587 --> 00:03:31,724
A little pizza, booze, staying
up till question mark.
71
00:03:31,725 --> 00:03:33,626
Sounds like a rowdy good time.
72
00:03:33,627 --> 00:03:35,328
- Right on.
- Ah.
73
00:03:35,329 --> 00:03:36,862
Although I am
taking antibiotics
74
00:03:36,863 --> 00:03:37,863
so I shant drink,
75
00:03:37,864 --> 00:03:39,598
and I really do
have an early morning,
76
00:03:39,599 --> 00:03:41,367
so I should
turn in by 10:00.
77
00:03:41,368 --> 00:03:44,603
All right.
Question mark equals 10:00.
78
00:03:46,707 --> 00:03:47,840
Hello.
79
00:03:47,841 --> 00:03:50,009
Hello, you must
be Mrs. Dunbar, so pleased...
80
00:03:50,010 --> 00:03:51,344
This is Bunny Dunbar.
81
00:03:51,345 --> 00:03:52,962
I would like to
make an appointment
82
00:03:52,963 --> 00:03:54,880
at your salon for later today.
83
00:03:54,881 --> 00:03:57,183
Hi, mom.
I'm glad you could...
84
00:03:57,184 --> 00:04:00,686
Which services?
All of them, of course.
85
00:04:00,687 --> 00:04:05,057
Everything you've got,
just do, do, do it to me.
86
00:04:05,058 --> 00:04:07,109
Oh, great.
Thank you so much. Bye.
87
00:04:07,110 --> 00:04:10,279
- Rusty.
- Mommy.
88
00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:13,566
Don't touch.
89
00:04:13,567 --> 00:04:19,171
And you must be, um,
Russ' Sherpa?
90
00:04:23,443 --> 00:04:25,444
- My name is Timir.
- Oh.
91
00:04:25,445 --> 00:04:26,746
But please do call me Timmy.
92
00:04:26,747 --> 00:04:28,514
It's a real pleasure
to meet you, Mrs. Dunbar.
93
00:04:28,515 --> 00:04:31,117
- Oh, please, Mrs. Dunbar is
my ex-mother-in-law
94
00:04:31,118 --> 00:04:34,286
who, incidentally,
I wish was dead.
95
00:04:34,287 --> 00:04:37,456
- My grandma.
- Call me Bunny.
96
00:04:37,457 --> 00:04:40,092
All right.
Bunny.
97
00:04:40,093 --> 00:04:41,961
Oh, I just love your accent.
98
00:04:41,962 --> 00:04:44,497
Is it British with, like,
a touch of south African?
99
00:04:44,498 --> 00:04:45,464
Am I right?
100
00:04:45,465 --> 00:04:46,965
No, mom, actually Timmy's...
101
00:04:46,966 --> 00:04:48,834
Yes, you're exactly right.
102
00:04:48,835 --> 00:04:51,771
Huh, you learn
something new every day.
103
00:04:51,772 --> 00:04:52,838
Yes.
104
00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:56,742
Every day for
the last two years.
105
00:04:56,743 --> 00:04:59,145
Anyway, mom, so maybe today,
106
00:04:59,146 --> 00:05:00,145
lunch?
A movie?
107
00:05:00,146 --> 00:05:02,715
Mother-son
portrait sitting?
108
00:05:02,716 --> 00:05:04,817
Honey, I'm so sorry,
but I'm booked up
109
00:05:04,818 --> 00:05:05,951
for the rest of the day,
110
00:05:05,952 --> 00:05:07,787
and then tomorrow
I'm flying to London.
111
00:05:07,788 --> 00:05:12,358
But I am guessing that you
had a birthday this year.
112
00:05:12,359 --> 00:05:13,959
[Squeals]
113
00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:14,994
I knew it.
114
00:05:14,995 --> 00:05:17,797
So I just popped by
to give you this.
115
00:05:17,798 --> 00:05:20,433
Ooh la la!
116
00:05:20,434 --> 00:05:21,500
Wonder what it is.
117
00:05:21,501 --> 00:05:22,468
Sounds wildly expensive.
118
00:05:22,469 --> 00:05:24,470
Well, yeah, but you deserve it.
119
00:05:24,471 --> 00:05:26,972
Based on...?
120
00:05:26,973 --> 00:05:30,009
Rusty, your little friend
is so charming.
121
00:05:30,010 --> 00:05:32,411
I'd love him to
join us for dinner tonight.
122
00:05:32,412 --> 00:05:33,946
I would be absolutely honored.
123
00:05:33,947 --> 00:05:35,197
Oh, splendid.
124
00:05:35,198 --> 00:05:36,415
And now I have to go.
125
00:05:36,416 --> 00:05:37,950
I have to have
a young Brazilian man
126
00:05:37,951 --> 00:05:40,086
tend to my every need.
127
00:05:40,087 --> 00:05:43,122
And then I'm going to the spa.
128
00:05:43,123 --> 00:05:45,858
I'm laughing because
it's uncomfortable.
129
00:05:45,859 --> 00:05:47,910
Ciao, boys.
130
00:05:47,911 --> 00:05:50,463
Ciao.
131
00:05:50,464 --> 00:05:53,332
And Vince cut the cord,
and the doctor
132
00:05:53,333 --> 00:05:55,301
handed the baby to Teresa,
133
00:05:55,302 --> 00:05:58,137
and even though
I was only the surrogate,
134
00:05:58,138 --> 00:05:59,638
I burst into tears.
135
00:05:59,639 --> 00:06:04,443
Oh, that sounds
so perfect and wonderful.
136
00:06:04,444 --> 00:06:06,846
Yeah, it's all real solid.
137
00:06:06,847 --> 00:06:07,930
And if this works out,
138
00:06:07,931 --> 00:06:09,064
I'll be getting
into the city more,
139
00:06:09,065 --> 00:06:14,653
so I can catch
some Yankees games.
140
00:06:14,654 --> 00:06:16,655
You're a Yankees fan.
141
00:06:16,656 --> 00:06:18,190
Uh, Jeff's a mets fan.
142
00:06:18,191 --> 00:06:20,025
But what baseball team
anyone likes
143
00:06:20,026 --> 00:06:22,912
should have no bearing
on what we're doing here.
144
00:06:22,913 --> 00:06:25,798
Of course not.
145
00:06:25,799 --> 00:06:27,032
What difference should it make
146
00:06:27,033 --> 00:06:28,901
that your team just
buys the pennant every year.
147
00:06:28,902 --> 00:06:30,069
Jeff.
148
00:06:30,070 --> 00:06:32,271
The Yankees develop a ton
of their own talent.
149
00:06:32,272 --> 00:06:34,340
Jeter, Posada, Rivera.
150
00:06:34,341 --> 00:06:35,341
All home grown.
151
00:06:35,342 --> 00:06:38,911
Uh, you're
smoking some home grown.
152
00:06:38,912 --> 00:06:39,979
You're done talking.
153
00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:42,348
So, uh, should we
call the agency, or...
154
00:06:42,349 --> 00:06:44,350
Maybe October's a good time,
155
00:06:44,351 --> 00:06:46,635
since Jeff won't have
any baseball to watch.
156
00:06:46,636 --> 00:06:52,591
[Fake laugh]
This isn't gonna work.
157
00:06:52,592 --> 00:06:55,978
Sorry, he blew it.
Same way the mets always do.
158
00:06:55,979 --> 00:06:57,563
We'll see next year.
159
00:06:57,564 --> 00:07:00,065
We'll see.
160
00:07:00,066 --> 00:07:01,534
She's not wrong.
161
00:07:01,535 --> 00:07:04,970
Until the mets get another bat
and some middle relief...
162
00:07:04,971 --> 00:07:08,707
They're not going anywhere.
163
00:07:08,708 --> 00:07:11,827
What was your mother's
belated birthday gift, sir?
164
00:07:11,828 --> 00:07:12,878
A money clip.
165
00:07:12,879 --> 00:07:14,747
I won't say
how much she gave me,
166
00:07:14,748 --> 00:07:19,385
but every bill has a picture
of president Franklin.
167
00:07:19,386 --> 00:07:21,287
Benjamin Franklin
was not president.
168
00:07:21,288 --> 00:07:25,057
Heh heh, not of your country.
169
00:07:25,058 --> 00:07:26,425
Because you had
the starving dude
170
00:07:26,426 --> 00:07:29,528
with the glasses
and the diaper.
171
00:07:29,529 --> 00:07:32,565
Gandhi certainly
had that coming.
172
00:07:32,566 --> 00:07:34,483
Well, I shouldn't
flaunt my gifts.
173
00:07:34,484 --> 00:07:37,102
I mean,
you had it tough growing up.
174
00:07:37,103 --> 00:07:38,303
What was your
Christmas present?
175
00:07:38,304 --> 00:07:43,008
You get to ride the goat
before everyone ate it?
176
00:07:43,009 --> 00:07:44,944
We didn't
celebrate Christmas, sir.
177
00:07:44,945 --> 00:07:48,214
You didn't even
get to ride the goat.
178
00:07:48,215 --> 00:07:49,281
All you got for your birthday
179
00:07:49,282 --> 00:07:52,351
was a phone call
from your mom in India.
180
00:07:52,352 --> 00:07:54,353
What phone call?
181
00:07:54,354 --> 00:07:56,038
Oh, your mom called
a couple of months ago.
182
00:07:56,039 --> 00:07:59,525
I think you were getting me
a bagel or something.
183
00:07:59,526 --> 00:08:01,527
Why on earth
didn't you say something?
184
00:08:01,528 --> 00:08:03,696
I know I didn't,
but I will now.
185
00:08:03,697 --> 00:08:07,700
Watch the
personal calls at work.
186
00:08:07,701 --> 00:08:09,301
Sir, my mother gave me
the greatest gifts of all.
187
00:08:09,302 --> 00:08:12,004
Love, support,
and quality time.
188
00:08:12,005 --> 00:08:14,340
Yeah, poor people presents.
189
00:08:14,341 --> 00:08:18,277
Sir, all this stuff
your mother gives you
190
00:08:18,278 --> 00:08:20,879
is merely a sad replacement
for any of those things.
191
00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:22,281
It's not all stuff.
192
00:08:22,282 --> 00:08:25,618
He said, fondling
his wad of 100s.
193
00:08:25,619 --> 00:08:28,854
How about she's taking me
to dinner tonight.
194
00:08:28,855 --> 00:08:30,322
How about that
"quality time" for ya?
195
00:08:30,323 --> 00:08:32,291
Very well.
196
00:08:32,292 --> 00:08:36,578
If you do decide
to give it a thought,
197
00:08:36,579 --> 00:08:38,230
perhaps you'll realize
there's some truth
198
00:08:38,231 --> 00:08:41,300
to what I'm saying, sir.
199
00:08:41,301 --> 00:08:44,136
Give it some thought.
Ugh.
200
00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:49,575
It was so nice to meet you,
and I am so glad
201
00:08:49,576 --> 00:08:51,410
you don't care about baseball.
202
00:08:51,411 --> 00:08:53,178
All righty then.
203
00:08:53,179 --> 00:08:55,247
Well, I guess
we'll be talking soon.
204
00:08:55,248 --> 00:08:56,565
- Yeah.
- I hope so.
205
00:08:56,566 --> 00:08:59,318
I guess if this works out,
206
00:08:59,319 --> 00:09:00,719
we'll have to shift
our time table.
207
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:01,820
Why?
208
00:09:01,821 --> 00:09:02,921
Well, we'll have to wait
for you
209
00:09:02,922 --> 00:09:05,424
- to give birth to that one.
- Oh, my God.
210
00:09:14,167 --> 00:09:18,404
I guess she had somewhere
to go, but I like our chances.
211
00:09:22,575 --> 00:09:24,576
Mr. Rhodes,
your pizza arrived.
212
00:09:24,577 --> 00:09:25,911
Ah.
Sweet.
213
00:09:25,912 --> 00:09:27,446
I'm having a big guys' night.
214
00:09:27,447 --> 00:09:29,581
Oh, got friends coming over?
215
00:09:29,582 --> 00:09:33,018
Well, a lot of solid maybes.
216
00:09:33,019 --> 00:09:34,153
You want in?
217
00:09:34,154 --> 00:09:36,855
I'm working.
Hence the outfit.
218
00:09:36,856 --> 00:09:38,474
Hey, come up when
your shift is over.
219
00:09:38,475 --> 00:09:42,895
Let's call that
another solid maybe.
220
00:09:42,896 --> 00:09:46,031
But we're gonna be crushing it
on the late tip.
221
00:09:46,032 --> 00:09:48,233
I don't know what that means.
222
00:09:52,305 --> 00:09:54,540
[Elevator powers down]
223
00:09:54,541 --> 00:09:56,041
Frank?
224
00:09:56,042 --> 00:09:58,844
The elevator
seems to have stopped.
225
00:09:58,845 --> 00:10:00,679
[Knocking on elevator door]
226
00:10:00,680 --> 00:10:03,215
Frankie!
227
00:10:06,619 --> 00:10:09,955
So how is everyone's food?
228
00:10:09,956 --> 00:10:12,257
Oh, were it legal for a man
to marry a plate of paella,
229
00:10:12,258 --> 00:10:14,693
I would take this to city hall
post haste.
230
00:10:14,694 --> 00:10:18,464
Marrying food must be legal.
231
00:10:18,465 --> 00:10:21,934
Rusty's father
is married to a tart.
232
00:10:21,935 --> 00:10:24,169
Okay, I think she's referring
to my stepmom, Cammy,
233
00:10:24,170 --> 00:10:26,822
who is several years my junior.
234
00:10:26,823 --> 00:10:29,608
Who, unlike some people,
called me on my birthday.
235
00:10:29,609 --> 00:10:33,846
Darling, you know that your
birthday is very hard for me.
236
00:10:33,847 --> 00:10:37,182
It reminds me that
time does not stand still,
237
00:10:37,183 --> 00:10:40,986
even though
the muscles of my face do.
238
00:10:40,987 --> 00:10:45,124
Mommy's very upset right now.
239
00:10:45,125 --> 00:10:47,693
My goodness, I would not want
to play poker against you.
240
00:10:51,131 --> 00:10:53,832
Oh, no, sorry.
Have I offended you?
241
00:10:53,833 --> 00:10:57,269
Not at all.
I'm laughing.
242
00:10:57,270 --> 00:11:00,355
Rusty, I know
this is hard for you,
243
00:11:00,356 --> 00:11:01,907
but in my own defense,
244
00:11:01,908 --> 00:11:03,776
I've always
missed your birthday.
245
00:11:03,777 --> 00:11:05,227
Well, that's true.
246
00:11:05,228 --> 00:11:06,645
But I think
the hurt has finally
247
00:11:06,646 --> 00:11:08,647
caught up to me
now that I'm 35.
248
00:11:08,648 --> 00:11:11,216
35, please.
249
00:11:11,217 --> 00:11:12,918
Well, he is 35.
250
00:11:12,919 --> 00:11:14,386
I mean, I had him
when I was 17,
251
00:11:14,387 --> 00:11:17,289
and now I'm 52.
252
00:11:17,290 --> 00:11:20,793
Yes, well, I guess
that makes me seven.
253
00:11:20,794 --> 00:11:24,296
Well, rusty, I'm here now,
254
00:11:24,297 --> 00:11:26,965
and I know what to do
to make it up to you.
255
00:11:26,966 --> 00:11:30,202
- You do?
- Yes.
256
00:11:30,203 --> 00:11:31,336
Here.
257
00:11:31,337 --> 00:11:34,573
Oh, another gift.
258
00:11:34,574 --> 00:11:36,241
I thought it might be something
a little more...
259
00:11:36,242 --> 00:11:40,345
Well, it was very expensive.
Wait until you see it.
260
00:11:40,346 --> 00:11:43,515
Ah, a very expensive watch.
261
00:11:43,516 --> 00:11:46,385
Yes. And I had
three links removed
262
00:11:46,386 --> 00:11:50,756
so it would fit
my rusty's wrist perfectly.
263
00:11:50,757 --> 00:11:54,526
It's five links, mom.
264
00:11:54,527 --> 00:11:56,561
It's always been five links.
265
00:11:56,562 --> 00:11:58,297
How can you not know that?
266
00:11:58,298 --> 00:12:01,099
It doesn't hug my wrist,
267
00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:05,237
and it does not hug my heart!
268
00:12:05,238 --> 00:12:07,506
Rusty, stop!
Where are you going?
269
00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:14,174
Oh, no.
270
00:12:14,228 --> 00:12:16,763
I left my phone at home, and
Abby's supposed to call tonight.
271
00:12:16,764 --> 00:12:17,798
Abby?
272
00:12:17,799 --> 00:12:20,100
Yeah, our last
surrogate candidate.
273
00:12:20,101 --> 00:12:22,185
Right, right.
Don't worry about it.
274
00:12:22,186 --> 00:12:23,737
She's got my number...
When she gets your voice mail,
275
00:12:23,738 --> 00:12:24,805
she'll call me.
276
00:12:24,806 --> 00:12:26,907
All right, okay.
I'm counting on you.
277
00:12:26,908 --> 00:12:28,809
- Hey, Audrey.
- Oh, hey, Brenda.
278
00:12:28,810 --> 00:12:31,178
I see you let Jeff
out of his cage tonight.
279
00:12:31,179 --> 00:12:32,479
What's up, you big gorilla?
280
00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:33,947
Nothing much, carrot top.
281
00:12:33,948 --> 00:12:37,751
Look who has a light beer.
Why don't you grow a pair?
282
00:12:37,752 --> 00:12:39,353
Oh, well, I could borrow yours,
283
00:12:39,354 --> 00:12:41,622
except they're
in Audrey's purse.
284
00:12:41,623 --> 00:12:43,824
And you know,
for your information,
285
00:12:43,825 --> 00:12:45,325
the reason I am
drinking a light beer
286
00:12:45,326 --> 00:12:47,728
is because I don't want to end
up with a body like yours.
287
00:12:47,729 --> 00:12:51,898
Um, the last chick you dated
had a body exactly like mine.
288
00:12:51,899 --> 00:12:55,836
- Uh-uh, she was
only rocking "b" cups.
289
00:12:58,673 --> 00:13:00,641
Wow, I didn't think
it was possible,
290
00:13:00,642 --> 00:13:03,276
but you two are actually
classing this place down.
291
00:13:03,277 --> 00:13:04,594
Um...
292
00:13:04,595 --> 00:13:06,546
I gotta go make sure
that Sully has
293
00:13:06,547 --> 00:13:08,582
the correct spelling of my name
for the trophy.
294
00:13:08,583 --> 00:13:09,933
Oh, okay.
295
00:13:09,934 --> 00:13:12,185
Well, it's probably written
in your underwear, right?
296
00:13:16,024 --> 00:13:17,624
I get why you
went the other way.
297
00:13:17,625 --> 00:13:19,760
Yeah, and Jeff's
always there to remind me
298
00:13:19,761 --> 00:13:21,261
of what I'm not missing.
299
00:13:21,262 --> 00:13:22,562
Tell me about it.
300
00:13:22,563 --> 00:13:24,131
We have been trying
to find a surrogate,
301
00:13:24,132 --> 00:13:27,000
and he is dragging his feet
the whole way.
302
00:13:27,001 --> 00:13:28,368
- Why?
- I don't know.
303
00:13:28,369 --> 00:13:30,470
There's gotta be something
going on with him.
304
00:13:30,471 --> 00:13:32,472
Hey, um, just out of curiosity,
305
00:13:32,473 --> 00:13:35,676
what is the process for
joining up with your side?
306
00:13:35,677 --> 00:13:38,011
Oh, God.
We would love to have you.
307
00:13:38,012 --> 00:13:41,448
Plus, I could really
use the commission.
308
00:13:45,787 --> 00:13:47,654
How's it going out there?
309
00:13:47,655 --> 00:13:50,090
Hector the repairman's
on his way.
310
00:13:50,091 --> 00:13:52,592
Right on.
Yeah, the more the merrier.
311
00:13:52,593 --> 00:13:56,029
Are you implying that
this is your guys' night,
312
00:13:56,030 --> 00:13:59,332
and you're counting the
repairman and me as attendees?
313
00:13:59,333 --> 00:14:01,401
Is that all right?
314
00:14:01,402 --> 00:14:03,704
Yeah, that's all right.
315
00:14:03,705 --> 00:14:06,440
Also pretty sad.
316
00:14:06,441 --> 00:14:09,142
Hey!
Hola, Hector.
317
00:14:09,143 --> 00:14:12,679
Oh, there he is.
That guy, he's the guy.
318
00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:15,115
Cold one
coming your way, Hector.
319
00:14:16,784 --> 00:14:19,920
Oh...
320
00:14:19,921 --> 00:14:21,254
No worries, man.
Let's try it again.
321
00:14:21,255 --> 00:14:24,841
Heads up, Hector.
322
00:14:26,494 --> 00:14:29,763
Guys, we're out of beer.
323
00:14:34,669 --> 00:14:36,970
And another one for Brenda.
324
00:14:36,971 --> 00:14:39,356
[Cheers] Boo.
325
00:14:39,357 --> 00:14:43,110
Abby hasn't called yet.
Let me see your phone.
326
00:14:43,111 --> 00:14:45,779
Jeff, you missed six calls.
Oh, damn it.
327
00:14:45,780 --> 00:14:47,981
I was about to take it
off silent.
328
00:14:47,982 --> 00:14:49,750
Perfect.
And voice mail.
329
00:14:49,751 --> 00:14:51,118
I swear, I'm going to punch you
in the neck!
330
00:14:51,119 --> 00:14:54,371
Hi, Abby, it's Audrey.
331
00:14:54,372 --> 00:14:56,873
Listen, if you haven't
left town yet,
332
00:14:56,874 --> 00:14:58,525
could you please call Jeff's
phone again?
333
00:14:58,526 --> 00:15:02,062
Thank you.
334
00:15:02,063 --> 00:15:04,197
I'm sorry.
335
00:15:04,198 --> 00:15:05,699
And one more for Brenda.
336
00:15:05,700 --> 00:15:08,068
Well, looks like
the vote is a tie.
337
00:15:08,069 --> 00:15:09,402
A tie?
338
00:15:09,403 --> 00:15:11,054
Yeah, that's
what's important here,
339
00:15:11,055 --> 00:15:13,306
that stupid softball trophy.
340
00:15:13,307 --> 00:15:16,076
- Hey, Audrey played in a game.
- Yeah, she should get a vote.
341
00:15:16,077 --> 00:15:18,245
Okay, Audrey,
342
00:15:18,246 --> 00:15:20,313
we need you to decide who wins.
343
00:15:25,219 --> 00:15:28,922
Congratulations.
344
00:15:28,923 --> 00:15:31,291
No.
No, I haven't decided yet.
345
00:15:31,292 --> 00:15:34,227
I know how much this trophy
means to Jeff.
346
00:15:34,228 --> 00:15:38,098
Recently he's been
thoughtless and selfish,
347
00:15:38,099 --> 00:15:40,667
and I can barely look at him
right now.
348
00:15:40,668 --> 00:15:45,472
But being the bigger person,
I vote for Jeff.
349
00:15:49,010 --> 00:15:51,645
Yeah!
[Shouts]
350
00:15:51,646 --> 00:15:52,779
Yes!
351
00:15:52,780 --> 00:15:56,783
Yeah, look at this baby!
I love it!
352
00:16:04,625 --> 00:16:08,628
[Knock on door]
353
00:16:08,629 --> 00:16:12,332
Come in.
354
00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:13,533
Rusty?
355
00:16:13,534 --> 00:16:16,236
Hey, mom.
What'd you bring me this time?
356
00:16:16,237 --> 00:16:19,706
Oh, rusty, I'm really sorry
357
00:16:19,707 --> 00:16:21,041
that I haven't
been there for you
358
00:16:21,042 --> 00:16:23,143
in the way that
you wanted me to be.
359
00:16:23,144 --> 00:16:25,912
Timmy and I have had
a good long talk about it.
360
00:16:25,913 --> 00:16:27,047
- Timmy?
- Yes, sir.
361
00:16:27,048 --> 00:16:28,682
You're mother insisted
I enlighten her
362
00:16:28,683 --> 00:16:29,950
as to why you're so upset.
363
00:16:29,951 --> 00:16:30,917
Yeah.
364
00:16:30,918 --> 00:16:32,385
Some of it has
hit me pretty hard.
365
00:16:32,386 --> 00:16:35,288
Well, somebody
had to start the dialogue
366
00:16:35,289 --> 00:16:37,791
to let the healing begin.
367
00:16:37,792 --> 00:16:41,094
That was me.
I did that.
368
00:16:41,095 --> 00:16:42,629
Timmy has made me realize that
369
00:16:42,630 --> 00:16:45,432
I haven't been
much of a mother to you.
370
00:16:47,635 --> 00:16:50,303
Well, I barely saw you after
you won the custody battle
371
00:16:50,304 --> 00:16:52,939
and I had to stay with dad.
372
00:16:55,776 --> 00:16:59,546
I know I can't change the past.
373
00:16:59,547 --> 00:17:01,615
But I'm finally
going to give you the gift
374
00:17:01,616 --> 00:17:04,918
that I should have given you
a long time ago.
375
00:17:04,919 --> 00:17:07,837
A pony?
Is there a pony in the hallway?
376
00:17:07,838 --> 00:17:09,089
No.
377
00:17:09,090 --> 00:17:10,790
No, I am going to give you
the gift
378
00:17:10,791 --> 00:17:13,226
of self-reliance
and independence.
379
00:17:13,227 --> 00:17:14,678
No more trust fund.
380
00:17:14,679 --> 00:17:15,845
Wait, that's not
what I suggested.
381
00:17:15,846 --> 00:17:17,797
That's not what I suggested.
382
00:17:17,798 --> 00:17:20,850
No more free apartment.
383
00:17:20,851 --> 00:17:23,970
No more my business manager
paying all the bills.
384
00:17:23,971 --> 00:17:27,040
You're finally going
to become a real man.
385
00:17:27,041 --> 00:17:29,809
With a pony?
386
00:17:29,810 --> 00:17:33,280
It's time to grow up, rusty.
387
00:17:33,281 --> 00:17:35,348
I don't want to.
388
00:17:35,349 --> 00:17:38,485
It's for the best.
389
00:17:38,486 --> 00:17:40,287
I love you, son.
390
00:17:46,294 --> 00:17:48,828
And let's have breakfast
together tomorrow
391
00:17:48,829 --> 00:17:49,863
before I leave.
392
00:17:49,864 --> 00:17:51,498
I'd like that.
393
00:17:51,499 --> 00:17:54,501
Bye.
394
00:17:59,974 --> 00:18:01,574
Hmm.
395
00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:10,383
[Clears throat]
396
00:18:10,384 --> 00:18:13,086
Just not in the face, sir.
397
00:18:14,889 --> 00:18:17,057
[Repeated paintball gunfire]
398
00:18:17,058 --> 00:18:22,028
Ow...
Nor the genitals.
399
00:18:22,029 --> 00:18:23,997
Jeff,
400
00:18:23,998 --> 00:18:26,032
Sully just threw up
on my sandal.
401
00:18:26,033 --> 00:18:27,600
I'm going to go try
to rinse it off,
402
00:18:27,601 --> 00:18:29,235
- and then I'd like to leave.
- Yeah, but then you're going...
403
00:18:29,236 --> 00:18:31,304
I'm okay missing
the slide show.
404
00:18:31,305 --> 00:18:33,573
You can watch it online later.
405
00:18:33,574 --> 00:18:36,676
I'm not gonna
watch it online later.
406
00:18:36,677 --> 00:18:40,580
And they let you people
get married, and not me.
407
00:18:40,581 --> 00:18:42,682
Audrey, I'm sorry I've been
such a jackass.
408
00:18:42,683 --> 00:18:44,985
This whole surrogate thing
has just got me crazy.
409
00:18:44,986 --> 00:18:47,187
Yeah, why is it taking so long?
410
00:18:47,188 --> 00:18:49,823
From my point of view,
the problem is Jeff exists.
411
00:18:49,824 --> 00:18:52,359
I guess the idea of a stranger
412
00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:54,494
being such a big part
of our lives
413
00:18:54,495 --> 00:18:55,495
just seems weird to me.
414
00:18:55,496 --> 00:18:58,064
I don't let a stranger
park my car.
415
00:18:58,065 --> 00:19:02,102
Yeah, 'cause then
you'd have to tip them.
416
00:19:02,103 --> 00:19:04,137
I make a salary.
417
00:19:04,138 --> 00:19:06,439
And we've been burned before.
418
00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:07,841
And whoever you end up choosing,
419
00:19:07,842 --> 00:19:10,510
you don't really know 'em...
It's rough.
420
00:19:10,511 --> 00:19:12,512
Yes, I know.
It's rough.
421
00:19:12,513 --> 00:19:15,915
But it's where we are.
422
00:19:18,753 --> 00:19:19,753
I'll do it.
423
00:19:19,754 --> 00:19:22,589
Both: What?
424
00:19:22,590 --> 00:19:24,924
What are you saying?
425
00:19:24,925 --> 00:19:28,395
I'm saying that
I'll be your surrogate,
426
00:19:28,396 --> 00:19:29,596
you know, if you want.
427
00:19:29,597 --> 00:19:32,632
Are you serious?
428
00:19:32,633 --> 00:19:35,268
Yeah.
429
00:19:35,269 --> 00:19:37,937
Yeah.
I'm serious.
430
00:19:37,938 --> 00:19:40,273
Put your baby in me.
431
00:19:40,274 --> 00:19:43,743
Wait...
So this is real?
432
00:19:43,744 --> 00:19:45,945
You would actually
do this for us?
433
00:19:45,946 --> 00:19:47,480
Yeah.
434
00:19:47,481 --> 00:19:49,215
Audrey, I really like you.
435
00:19:49,216 --> 00:19:54,254
And, Jeff,
you're...Married to her.
436
00:19:57,358 --> 00:19:58,558
We accept.
437
00:19:58,559 --> 00:19:59,926
Great.
438
00:19:59,927 --> 00:20:02,362
I would kiss you,
but I wouldn't want
439
00:20:02,363 --> 00:20:04,264
to make you all hot
and confused.
440
00:20:04,265 --> 00:20:06,933
Yeah, we probably
shouldn't risk it.
441
00:20:06,934 --> 00:20:10,036
Thank you.
Oh, thank you so much.
442
00:20:10,037 --> 00:20:12,856
- This is amazing.
- I like where this is headed.
443
00:20:14,375 --> 00:20:17,143
You realize you're signing on
for about a year of this.
444
00:20:25,582 --> 00:20:26,916
[Ding]
445
00:20:27,010 --> 00:20:28,644
Adam?
446
00:20:29,538 --> 00:20:31,607
Jeff.
447
00:20:31,638 --> 00:20:33,673
[Chuckles]
448
00:20:33,674 --> 00:20:35,908
You made it, big dog!
449
00:20:35,909 --> 00:20:37,643
Yeah, we're out of beer.
450
00:20:37,644 --> 00:20:39,478
Uh, the other guys left.
451
00:20:39,479 --> 00:20:43,132
But we could get
our rally on, huh?
452
00:20:43,133 --> 00:20:44,951
No, Jeff, come back here.
453
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:47,286
Look, I'm very hungry.
[Ding]
454
00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:49,589
Help me, please!
455
456
00:20:59,975 --> 00:21:04,525
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
32077
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese