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1
00:02:07,295 --> 00:02:12,732
♪ Yes, I'm gonna be a pop star ♪
2
00:02:13,835 --> 00:02:18,738
♪ Yes, I'm gonna be
a pop star, now ♪
3
00:02:20,475 --> 00:02:23,843
♪ Yes, I'm going to be
a pop star ♪
4
00:02:27,115 --> 00:02:30,483
♪ Oh, Mama,
Mama, see me ♪
5
00:02:30,485 --> 00:02:34,354
♪ Mama, Mama, see me
I'm a pop star ♪
6
00:02:37,659 --> 00:02:38,891
♪ Oh ♪
7
00:02:38,893 --> 00:02:44,964
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on the TV now, now ♪
8
00:02:44,966 --> 00:02:50,370
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on the TV, now ♪
9
00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:55,541
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on the TV, now ♪
10
00:02:58,847 --> 00:03:02,248
♪ Oh, Mama,
Mama, see me ♪
11
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:06,853
♪ Mama, Mama,
see me on the TV ♪
12
00:03:06,855 --> 00:03:08,087
♪ Oh ♪
13
00:03:10,725 --> 00:03:16,462
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on my first gig ♪
14
00:03:17,499 --> 00:03:22,435
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on my first gig ♪
15
00:03:23,438 --> 00:03:28,007
♪ Yes, I'm goin'
on my first gig ♪
16
00:03:30,612 --> 00:03:33,946
♪ Oh, Mama,
Mama, see me ♪
17
00:03:33,948 --> 00:03:39,152
♪ Mama, Mama,
see me on my first gig ♪
18
00:03:41,189 --> 00:03:43,055
♪ Oh, listen to me ♪♪
19
00:03:46,861 --> 00:03:50,196
♪ I drove for miles and miles ♪
20
00:03:50,198 --> 00:03:55,902
♪ And wound up at your door ♪
21
00:03:55,904 --> 00:03:59,572
♪ I've had you so many times ♪
22
00:03:59,574 --> 00:04:06,045
♪ But somehow I want more ♪
23
00:04:06,047 --> 00:04:10,950
♪ I don't mind
spending every day ♪
24
00:04:10,952 --> 00:04:16,222
♪ Out on your corner
in the pouring rain ♪
25
00:04:16,224 --> 00:04:21,627
♪ Look for the girl
with the broken smile ♪
26
00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:25,731
♪ Ask her if she'd like
to stay for a while ♪
27
00:04:25,733 --> 00:04:30,736
♪ And she will be loved ♪
28
00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:34,106
♪ And she will be ♪
29
00:04:34,108 --> 00:04:40,913
♪ Loved ♪♪
30
00:04:46,488 --> 00:04:49,088
Mr. Lanz? I'm done.
31
00:04:52,327 --> 00:04:54,594
No.
32
00:04:54,596 --> 00:04:57,497
Forgive me. No.
33
00:04:58,700 --> 00:05:00,500
You're just beginning.
34
00:05:01,336 --> 00:05:03,536
You liked it?
Liked it?
35
00:05:03,538 --> 00:05:06,772
You made me
want to swallow poison.
36
00:05:06,774 --> 00:05:10,309
And forget pitch,
rhythm and tone...
37
00:05:10,311 --> 00:05:15,448
and emotional attachment
to the lyric or the melody.
38
00:05:15,450 --> 00:05:17,617
I'm sorry.
I don't think I...
39
00:05:17,619 --> 00:05:21,821
A grain of sand
slips into an oyster...
40
00:05:21,823 --> 00:05:25,291
and irritates the bivalve.
41
00:05:25,293 --> 00:05:27,894
What happens?
A pearl.
42
00:05:27,896 --> 00:05:29,395
Celine Dion.
43
00:05:29,397 --> 00:05:32,231
Miss Nicki Minaj.
44
00:05:32,233 --> 00:05:34,000
Christina Aguilera occasionally.
45
00:05:34,002 --> 00:05:39,472
All of them deeply,
profoundly irritating.
46
00:05:39,474 --> 00:05:42,208
Each one of 'em a huge star.
47
00:05:43,211 --> 00:05:45,545
You, mighty Mo...
48
00:05:46,481 --> 00:05:48,047
are that irritant.
49
00:05:48,049 --> 00:05:51,217
So you'll represent me?
50
00:05:53,588 --> 00:05:56,389
If you'll have me...
51
00:05:56,391 --> 00:05:58,257
Richie Lanz Management...
52
00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:01,994
globally, in all markets.
53
00:06:10,939 --> 00:06:13,873
Welcome to the team.
Thank you! Thank you.
54
00:06:13,875 --> 00:06:15,341
So $1,200?
55
00:06:15,343 --> 00:06:19,045
It's just to cover wardrobe,
studio time, gym classes.
56
00:06:19,047 --> 00:06:20,846
Oh, I go to a gym.
57
00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,682
Want to get you
a good blender too.
58
00:06:23,851 --> 00:06:26,552
Wow.
I got goose bumps. Me too.
59
00:06:26,554 --> 00:06:28,354
Oh, personal check.
60
00:06:28,356 --> 00:06:31,290
- I'm going to say it's okay, Ronnie.
- Yeah.
61
00:06:31,292 --> 00:06:35,094
Here's our contract.
The only one we'll ever have. Ever.
62
00:06:35,096 --> 00:06:37,063
My handshake is my word.
63
00:06:37,065 --> 00:06:40,600
Conning checks from losers.
64
00:06:41,469 --> 00:06:44,136
Booking cover bands
for bar mitzvahs.
65
00:06:44,138 --> 00:06:47,640
What happened to
that smile you had, huh?
66
00:06:47,642 --> 00:06:49,976
That Richie Lanz smile.
What'd you call it?
67
00:06:51,379 --> 00:06:53,980
Hey, remember, we got
that thing at Pogo's tonight.
68
00:06:58,152 --> 00:07:01,320
Your "winner's smile."
That's what you called it.
69
00:07:01,322 --> 00:07:05,958
All those pictures in your office,
you had that grin.
70
00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:09,295
That grin, man.
You were really something.
71
00:07:10,398 --> 00:07:12,832
Am.
72
00:07:12,834 --> 00:07:15,067
Not were, sweetheart. Am.
73
00:07:15,069 --> 00:07:18,738
Yeah, sure,
I'm taking some hits,
74
00:07:18,740 --> 00:07:21,173
you know, but this is
all rope-a-dope, baby.
75
00:07:21,175 --> 00:07:25,444
It looks pretty bad for Richie Lanz
from the cheap seats,
76
00:07:25,446 --> 00:07:27,613
but I am still
in the goddamn game.
77
00:07:27,615 --> 00:07:30,082
You know,
this is not forever.
78
00:07:30,084 --> 00:07:34,587
This is right now.
This is Van Nuys.
79
00:07:34,589 --> 00:07:39,592
Life's about seeing an open door
and walking right through it.
80
00:07:39,594 --> 00:07:44,764
Obviously, some asshole has changed
the goddamn locks on me,
81
00:07:44,766 --> 00:07:48,167
but... there's still
a door there.
82
00:07:48,169 --> 00:07:49,802
I can see it.
83
00:07:49,804 --> 00:07:52,838
I have always found a way.
I always will.
84
00:07:54,275 --> 00:07:57,209
- I mean, how do you think I found Madonna?
- Richie.
85
00:07:57,211 --> 00:07:59,145
Singing for spare change
in front of Hamburger Hamlet.
86
00:07:59,147 --> 00:08:01,781
Okay, is this our talk?
Because you promised me...
87
00:08:01,783 --> 00:08:03,616
after one year
I'd be singing my own songs.
88
00:08:03,618 --> 00:08:06,052
I don't really...
see that now.
89
00:08:07,288 --> 00:08:09,789
Wear your Meredith Brooks
outfit tonight, please.
90
00:08:09,791 --> 00:08:12,625
Door number one. That's you.
91
00:08:12,627 --> 00:08:14,860
We have to talk, Richie.
92
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:16,896
No!
I don't like this!
93
00:08:16,898 --> 00:08:18,631
We have to rock!
94
00:08:30,845 --> 00:08:34,013
♪ I hate the world today ♪
95
00:08:34,015 --> 00:08:38,718
♪ You're so good to me
I know, but I can't change ♪
96
00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,687
♪ Tried to tell you
but you look at me ♪
97
00:08:41,689 --> 00:08:45,424
♪ Like maybe
I'm an angel underneath ♪
98
00:08:45,426 --> 00:08:48,160
♪ Innocent and sweet ♪
99
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,597
♪ Yesterday I cried ♪
100
00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:53,599
♪ You must have been relieved ♪
101
00:08:53,601 --> 00:08:57,002
♪ To see the softer side ♪
102
00:08:57,004 --> 00:09:00,106
♪ I can understand how
you'd be so confused ♪
103
00:09:00,108 --> 00:09:02,441
What's up, buddy?
She's great, isn't she?
104
00:09:02,443 --> 00:09:04,043
♪ I don't envy you ♪
105
00:09:04,045 --> 00:09:06,378
The girl's not that great.
You're too drunk to know.
106
00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:08,080
♪ All rolled into one ♪
107
00:09:08,082 --> 00:09:10,583
♪ I'm a bitch
I'm a lover ♪
108
00:09:10,585 --> 00:09:12,752
♪ I'm a child
I'm a mother ♪
109
00:09:12,754 --> 00:09:14,220
♪ I'm a sinner
I'm a saint ♪
110
00:09:14,222 --> 00:09:16,255
- This shit rocks!
- Totally.
111
00:09:16,257 --> 00:09:18,124
I love this song.
♪ I do not feel ashamed ♪
112
00:09:18,126 --> 00:09:21,026
It rocks!
It totally rocks.
113
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:23,028
Whoo!
114
00:09:23,030 --> 00:09:25,264
♪ You know you wouldn't
want me any other way ♪
115
00:09:25,266 --> 00:09:28,601
I got to go check something.
Fuses or watts or something.
116
00:09:28,603 --> 00:09:31,403
No, no, no.
My man, my man, my man.
117
00:09:31,405 --> 00:09:35,941
What you gotta do
is bring this shit to Afghanistan.
118
00:09:36,911 --> 00:09:40,279
Afghanistan. Totally.
Got to.
119
00:09:42,550 --> 00:09:44,650
USO tour.
120
00:09:44,652 --> 00:09:47,453
That's me, man.
I book those things.
121
00:09:48,289 --> 00:09:49,588
This chick,
122
00:09:49,598 --> 00:09:53,454
opening for Demi goddamn Lovato
and that Solange?
123
00:09:55,960 --> 00:10:00,633
- The real Solange?
- Hells, yeah. In country, dude.
124
00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:03,769
Goddamn beautiful
this time of year.
125
00:10:03,772 --> 00:10:05,907
What time of year is it?
126
00:10:06,905 --> 00:10:09,008
May.
What?
127
00:10:09,018 --> 00:10:11,918
I think that it's May.
Kandahar rocks in May.
128
00:10:11,919 --> 00:10:14,348
Right, right.
Do the whole circuit...
129
00:10:14,349 --> 00:10:18,752
Herat, Mazar-e Sharif,
two nights in Kunduz, Kabul.
130
00:10:18,753 --> 00:10:20,319
Do the whole thing.
131
00:10:22,824 --> 00:10:26,592
You're talking a tour?
A hellacious tour, dude!
132
00:10:26,594 --> 00:10:28,661
For money?
133
00:10:28,663 --> 00:10:31,197
How about for your country?
134
00:10:31,199 --> 00:10:34,533
Hells, yeah. For a ton of money.
135
00:10:34,535 --> 00:10:36,602
We're at war, dude.
136
00:10:36,604 --> 00:10:39,438
The faucet is open.
137
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:41,640
♪ You do what you do ♪
138
00:10:41,642 --> 00:10:46,278
- ♪ And don't try to save me ♪
- One, two, three.
139
00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:48,814
♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a lover ♪
140
00:10:48,816 --> 00:10:51,150
♪ I'm a child
I'm a mother ♪
141
00:10:51,152 --> 00:10:53,819
♪ I'm a sinner
I'm a saint ♪
142
00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:56,121
♪ I do not feel ashamed ♪♪
143
00:10:58,159 --> 00:11:01,260
Daddy, nobody tours Afghanistan.
144
00:11:02,196 --> 00:11:05,164
That's not true.
Nobody good.
145
00:11:05,166 --> 00:11:07,399
Now you're just being cruel.
Aren't you?
146
00:11:07,401 --> 00:11:11,837
Sweetie, your dad
was a rock tour manager...
147
00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:13,906
Your dad is
a rock tour manager.
148
00:11:13,908 --> 00:11:15,674
And this is what
I'm supposed to do.
149
00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:18,244
I'm supposed to tour
with my act.
150
00:11:18,246 --> 00:11:22,481
Now yes,
it's a little bit out of town,
151
00:11:22,483 --> 00:11:24,550
but it's a start.
152
00:11:25,686 --> 00:11:29,321
The first thing I do
when I arrive,
153
00:11:29,323 --> 00:11:31,924
I'm going to head directly
to the Kasbah...
154
00:11:31,926 --> 00:11:33,425
where I will purchase for you...
155
00:11:33,427 --> 00:11:35,587
They don't have Kasbahs
in Afghanistan.
156
00:11:36,597 --> 00:11:41,166
What? No rock the Kasbah?
157
00:11:41,168 --> 00:11:42,835
Somebody is not
going to like that.
158
00:11:42,837 --> 00:11:44,603
They're in North Africa,
not Afghanistan.
159
00:11:44,605 --> 00:11:47,840
You are so
your father's daughter.
160
00:11:47,842 --> 00:11:49,508
Scary smart.
161
00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:51,176
And you got my looks too.
162
00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:54,446
You really have
the total package of me.
163
00:11:54,448 --> 00:11:56,782
Okay, then I'll just go
to the mall...
164
00:11:56,784 --> 00:11:59,385
and get you one of those stuffed
elephants with the mirrors all over it.
165
00:11:59,387 --> 00:12:01,353
Just come home.
166
00:12:02,757 --> 00:12:06,258
Hurry up! Ann Coulter's
gonna dance next!
167
00:12:07,428 --> 00:12:08,861
I gotta go.
Mmm.
168
00:12:08,863 --> 00:12:11,196
Dree!
169
00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:13,098
Dree.
170
00:12:14,802 --> 00:12:16,735
I love you.
171
00:12:16,737 --> 00:12:18,370
I love you more.
172
00:13:08,756 --> 00:13:10,956
Come on.
We're in the homestretch.
173
00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:13,359
Last leg.
174
00:13:13,361 --> 00:13:15,361
Come on. This is
just a short two-hour...
175
00:13:15,363 --> 00:13:16,996
Hell flight!
176
00:13:16,998 --> 00:13:19,331
It's a hell flight.
177
00:13:20,101 --> 00:13:22,167
This is a goddamn death trip.
178
00:13:23,004 --> 00:13:24,269
Forgive me.
179
00:13:24,271 --> 00:13:28,474
The '85 Bangles tour
was a death trip.
180
00:13:28,476 --> 00:13:32,177
Susanna Hoffs would not
even talk to her own mother.
181
00:13:32,179 --> 00:13:34,780
I'm going to hurl.
182
00:13:37,852 --> 00:13:39,451
What if they hate me?
183
00:13:39,453 --> 00:13:41,987
They're soldiers.
They'll kill me.
184
00:13:41,989 --> 00:13:43,856
You want my air?
Here. Take mine.
185
00:13:43,858 --> 00:13:47,192
No. I want to go home.
186
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:51,130
Hey, did I tell you my Stevie Nicks story?
Oh, God.
187
00:13:51,132 --> 00:13:54,800
It's the Rumours tour.
188
00:13:54,802 --> 00:13:57,069
Stevie can't go on.
189
00:13:57,071 --> 00:13:59,138
Stevie won't go on.
190
00:13:59,140 --> 00:14:01,006
Finally, I can't
stand it anymore.
191
00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:04,309
I run over to her,
grab her by the shoulders.
192
00:14:04,311 --> 00:14:06,478
I look her in the eye.
I say:
193
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:10,983
"Miss Stevie.
I'm nobody, but I'm a fan.
194
00:14:10,985 --> 00:14:14,586
And there's a lot of kids
out there tonight just like me...
195
00:14:14,588 --> 00:14:19,091
fans, who saved all month
to come and hear Stevie Nicks sing.
196
00:14:19,093 --> 00:14:21,627
To see Stevie Nicks twirl."
197
00:14:22,730 --> 00:14:24,229
What happened?
198
00:14:24,231 --> 00:14:27,599
Yeah. Crazy.
She head-butted me.
199
00:14:28,502 --> 00:14:30,903
Deviated septum...
that I still have.
200
00:14:32,606 --> 00:14:35,841
Blood everywhere,
all over both of us.
201
00:14:35,843 --> 00:14:41,080
But Miss Stevie Nicks went on and
did the show of her life that night.
202
00:14:41,082 --> 00:14:44,883
And Ms. Ronnie Smiler, I think you are
that same kind of professional.
203
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:47,019
I believe in you.
Mmm.
204
00:14:47,021 --> 00:14:50,255
He believes in you.
Oh, my God.
205
00:14:51,425 --> 00:14:54,026
You should see the way he
looks at you while you sleep.
206
00:14:54,028 --> 00:14:56,695
Stop it right now.
207
00:14:56,697 --> 00:14:58,430
"Not wearing underwear."
208
00:15:00,234 --> 00:15:02,201
You idiot.
That's what he's thinking.
209
00:15:02,203 --> 00:15:06,305
- You idiot.
- It's only rock and roll, babe.
210
00:15:09,376 --> 00:15:15,180
Yeah. Think Aspen.
But, you know, during wartime.
211
00:15:21,055 --> 00:15:23,722
This is the last of it?
It's not ours.
212
00:15:23,724 --> 00:15:26,058
Your luggage probably
never made it on the flight.
213
00:15:26,060 --> 00:15:28,127
It has been known to happen.
214
00:15:29,230 --> 00:15:31,063
Is there a lost-and-found?
215
00:15:31,065 --> 00:15:33,365
Not in the traditional sense,
sir.
216
00:15:34,802 --> 00:15:37,569
Richie, I want to get out of here.
Mm-hmm.
217
00:15:37,571 --> 00:15:40,973
Get me the hell out of here now.
Okay, Private?
218
00:15:40,975 --> 00:15:44,910
We'll proceed to the Majestic Hotel,
get you people squared away.
219
00:15:44,912 --> 00:15:48,413
Don't want to head into town in the dark,
even with a Humvee and body armor.
220
00:15:48,415 --> 00:15:50,315
I'll come back at 1900 hours,
221
00:15:50,317 --> 00:15:52,151
pick you up, take you to Camp Phoenix
for tonight's show.
222
00:15:52,153 --> 00:15:54,920
I'm sorry. Body armor?
223
00:15:54,922 --> 00:15:57,256
That's a good plan.
That's a great plan.
224
00:15:57,258 --> 00:15:59,525
Hey, guess what.
We're shopping here.
225
00:15:59,527 --> 00:16:02,427
My treat. They have
great shopping here.
226
00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:04,463
Hippie-chic stuff.
This is the...
227
00:16:04,465 --> 00:16:06,532
These people invented
the word "bazaar."
228
00:16:06,534 --> 00:16:08,667
Actually, sir,
we're in a lockdown mode.
229
00:16:08,669 --> 00:16:11,270
There's been an assassination attempt
on the Afghan president.
230
00:16:11,272 --> 00:16:14,773
Markets, restaurants, tourist spots,
anything outside of your hotel...
231
00:16:14,775 --> 00:16:16,842
is suggested off-limits
to all Westerners,
232
00:16:16,844 --> 00:16:18,443
NATO, UN personnel,
233
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,946
all non-government organizations,
until further notice.
234
00:16:20,948 --> 00:16:22,981
What? A lockdown?
235
00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:25,103
Yes.
What?
236
00:16:25,619 --> 00:16:27,186
Private.
237
00:16:28,189 --> 00:16:30,489
From now on, let's...
238
00:16:30,491 --> 00:16:34,693
We'll keep all of that
on a need-to-know basis, okay?
239
00:16:34,695 --> 00:16:36,335
Sir.
Yeah.
240
00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:40,666
Hey, hon.
Can't go out that way.
241
00:16:40,668 --> 00:16:42,634
We've gotta go out
this door here.
242
00:16:43,470 --> 00:16:45,370
Ronnie Smiler, everybody.
243
00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:47,973
Tonight at Camp Phoenix
at 8:00!
244
00:17:03,991 --> 00:17:07,326
♪ Bawitdaba, da bang da bang
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
245
00:17:07,328 --> 00:17:09,494
♪ Shake the boogie
said up jump the boogie ♪
246
00:17:09,496 --> 00:17:12,364
♪ Bawitdaba da bang da bang
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
247
00:17:12,366 --> 00:17:14,666
♪ Shake the boogie
said up jump the boogie ♪
248
00:17:14,668 --> 00:17:17,803
♪ Bawitdaba da bang da bang
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
249
00:17:19,673 --> 00:17:21,340
♪ And this is
for the questions ♪
250
00:17:21,342 --> 00:17:22,941
♪ That don't have any answers ♪
251
00:17:22,943 --> 00:17:25,043
♪ The midnight glances
and the topless dancers ♪
252
00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:27,879
♪ The can of freaks
Cars packed with speakers ♪
253
00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:30,616
♪ The G's with the 40s
And the chicks with beepers ♪
254
00:17:30,618 --> 00:17:33,285
♪ The Northern Lights
and the Southern Comfort ♪♪
255
00:17:33,287 --> 00:17:35,687
Aaah!
256
00:17:40,728 --> 00:17:43,695
I'm losing it, Richie.
What the... What is this?
257
00:17:43,697 --> 00:17:46,031
Nothing.
It's a Mexican quaalude.
258
00:17:46,033 --> 00:17:48,393
Can't this wait
until after the gig?
259
00:17:48,869 --> 00:17:50,602
Ho-Hold it.
260
00:17:50,604 --> 00:17:53,472
IED puffed a local
on Flower Street.
261
00:17:53,474 --> 00:17:55,374
Land mine blew up two
goats few blocks over.
262
00:17:55,376 --> 00:17:57,456
No worries.
We're good to go.
263
00:18:02,650 --> 00:18:04,730
You know what?
You can have half now.
264
00:18:07,087 --> 00:18:09,368
Save the rest
for the after-party.
265
00:18:10,758 --> 00:18:14,393
They're blowing up goats.
266
00:18:15,562 --> 00:18:18,430
Must be some sort of festival
or something.
267
00:18:29,910 --> 00:18:32,744
♪ Bawitdaba, da bang da bang,
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
268
00:18:32,746 --> 00:18:34,980
♪ Shake the boogie,
said up jump the boogie ♪
269
00:18:34,982 --> 00:18:37,983
♪ Bawitdaba, da bang da bang,
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
270
00:18:37,985 --> 00:18:40,452
♪ Shake the boogie,
said up jump the boogie ♪
271
00:18:40,454 --> 00:18:42,954
♪ Bawitdaba, da bang da bang,
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
272
00:18:42,956 --> 00:18:45,691
♪ Shake the boogie,
said up jump the boogie ♪
273
00:18:45,693 --> 00:18:48,960
♪ Bawitdaba, da bang da bang,
diggy, diggy, diggy ♪
274
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:56,868
Mr. Lanz,
this hotel is not MOSS...
275
00:18:56,870 --> 00:18:58,603
"Minimum Operating
Security Standards."
276
00:18:58,605 --> 00:19:00,672
They usually don't clear
our people to stay here,
277
00:19:00,674 --> 00:19:03,108
but the town's jammed up
and you're only here one night.
278
00:19:03,110 --> 00:19:06,778
Get a room at the back away from
the street and potential flying glass.
279
00:19:06,780 --> 00:19:09,381
Stay in it till I get here.
See you at 1900 hours.
280
00:19:09,383 --> 00:19:11,950
I can't feel my lower lip.
281
00:19:11,952 --> 00:19:13,485
Good girl.
282
00:19:13,487 --> 00:19:15,454
Richie Lanz checking in.
283
00:19:15,456 --> 00:19:19,191
Uh, we are obviously the talent for
tonight's show at Camp Phoenix.
284
00:19:19,193 --> 00:19:23,295
We've just come off
a hellacious flight from the coast...
285
00:19:23,297 --> 00:19:26,631
and would really appreciate
an upgrade,
286
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:29,568
possibly to a junior
executive suite.
287
00:19:29,570 --> 00:19:32,471
At the very least,
two adjoining bedrooms.
288
00:19:32,473 --> 00:19:34,840
Something with some size,
289
00:19:34,842 --> 00:19:37,209
and definitely
off the street, hmm?
290
00:19:44,918 --> 00:19:49,154
Hey. Bombay Brian
just got out of jail...
291
00:19:49,156 --> 00:19:53,125
for hanging two Taliban guys
upside down by their feet.
292
00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:57,763
Thank you for your sacrifice.
293
00:19:57,765 --> 00:20:00,565
You win, sir.
I upgraded you.
294
00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:05,837
- What room, Nasim?
- 26.
295
00:20:17,184 --> 00:20:19,351
My gal's got
a big show tonight.
296
00:20:19,353 --> 00:20:21,186
She's got to get her rest.
297
00:20:21,188 --> 00:20:23,922
Big... Big-time show.
298
00:20:25,459 --> 00:20:28,727
Hi.
299
00:20:28,729 --> 00:20:31,296
I'm gonna see you guys after
at the after-party. Right?
300
00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:33,538
Sure, I'll be there.
Good.
301
00:20:36,203 --> 00:20:39,871
♪ Don't forget about
the rock and roll ♪
302
00:21:15,409 --> 00:21:17,576
Yeah?
303
00:21:38,599 --> 00:21:41,299
- Hey.
- Oh, look out.
304
00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:43,435
Life is good.
Yes, and cheap.
305
00:21:43,437 --> 00:21:45,136
Yes. Cheap and good.
Bartender.
306
00:21:45,138 --> 00:21:47,772
Let me get a round of drinks
and one for our boy here?
307
00:21:47,774 --> 00:21:49,708
This is our card,
in case you need anything.
308
00:21:49,710 --> 00:21:51,977
Want you to have it.
Anything at all.
309
00:21:51,979 --> 00:21:54,613
"International Ballistics
and Munitions."
310
00:21:54,615 --> 00:21:56,648
Yeah.
IBM.
311
00:21:56,650 --> 00:21:58,817
Yeah, we sell bullets
to the good guys.
312
00:21:58,819 --> 00:22:00,452
Which is, you know,
karmically correct.
313
00:22:00,454 --> 00:22:04,222
And it's a $300 million contract
with the damn Pentagon, dude.
314
00:22:04,224 --> 00:22:07,626
It's insane. Billions...
Billions are pouring into this bitch.
315
00:22:07,628 --> 00:22:10,695
I am talking about US,
NGO dough. NATO.
316
00:22:10,697 --> 00:22:12,631
It is a goddamn cash waterfall.
317
00:22:12,633 --> 00:22:15,200
All you gotta do is tilt
your head back and swallow.
318
00:22:15,202 --> 00:22:16,868
It's porno.
319
00:22:19,039 --> 00:22:21,640
Six months ago,
we were Herbalife salesmen.
320
00:22:21,642 --> 00:22:25,810
Look at us now, huh? The goddamn ammo kings
of Kabul! Who would have fucking figured?
321
00:22:29,816 --> 00:22:32,817
Rise and shine, songbird.
322
00:22:32,819 --> 00:22:35,387
Your future's calling.
323
00:22:35,389 --> 00:22:37,255
♪ You can swim the sea ♪
324
00:22:37,257 --> 00:22:38,823
Ronnie?
325
00:22:38,825 --> 00:22:41,259
♪ You can jump
into the fire ♪
326
00:22:41,261 --> 00:22:42,661
Ronnie.
327
00:22:42,663 --> 00:22:44,596
♪ But you'll never be free ♪
328
00:22:45,499 --> 00:22:47,999
♪ You can shake me up ♪
329
00:22:48,001 --> 00:22:50,101
♪ Or I can break you down ♪
330
00:22:50,103 --> 00:22:52,170
She's gone!
331
00:22:52,172 --> 00:22:54,039
She is? Truly?
332
00:22:54,041 --> 00:22:56,508
- You ready to roll, sir?
- Hang on.
333
00:22:56,510 --> 00:22:59,578
Give me a second.
His Ronnie is gone.
334
00:22:59,580 --> 00:23:01,112
Kidnapped?
335
00:23:02,716 --> 00:23:04,249
Big Daddy. Big Daddy.
336
00:23:04,251 --> 00:23:06,084
We have a possible abduction
at the Majestic...
337
00:23:06,086 --> 00:23:10,288
No, she just left.
She wrote a note.
338
00:23:10,290 --> 00:23:11,756
She left a note.
339
00:23:11,758 --> 00:23:13,191
Copy that.
340
00:23:13,193 --> 00:23:16,027
Well, I'm afraid
that's a personal matter.
341
00:23:16,029 --> 00:23:20,065
She stole my wallet.
She took my wallet, my money, my passport.
342
00:23:20,067 --> 00:23:24,536
- Women, sir.
- Well, what about the show?
343
00:23:24,538 --> 00:23:27,772
Well, I guess the show
must go on.
344
00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:29,708
But without you guys.
345
00:23:29,710 --> 00:23:31,610
Good luck, sir.
346
00:23:34,581 --> 00:23:39,451
"Good luck, sir."
I'm royally fucked.
347
00:23:39,453 --> 00:23:42,887
♪ We can make each other happy ♪♪
Welcome to Afghanistan.
348
00:23:46,827 --> 00:23:48,994
How do you know
that she's gonna be here?
349
00:23:48,996 --> 00:23:51,162
There's nowhere else she
could possibly be, okay?
350
00:23:51,164 --> 00:23:52,931
There's no flights out of
this place until tomorrow.
351
00:23:52,933 --> 00:23:54,966
She is still in Kabul.
Trust me.
352
00:23:54,968 --> 00:23:57,435
And if she's in Kabul,
she's at the Volcan.
353
00:23:57,437 --> 00:23:58,970
Every-fucking-body's
at the Volcan.
354
00:23:58,972 --> 00:24:02,073
Say it with me.
Volcan! Volcan!
355
00:24:02,075 --> 00:24:05,644
- Volcan! Volcan!
- Just chill the fuck out.
356
00:24:05,646 --> 00:24:08,647
You're in Kabul, man.
Man up!
357
00:24:08,649 --> 00:24:10,849
Come on.
Go loud with me, bro.
358
00:24:13,754 --> 00:24:16,154
What the fuck was that?
359
00:24:16,156 --> 00:24:18,590
Come on.
Go loud with us. Let's go.
360
00:24:18,592 --> 00:24:21,660
Raise it.
There we are.
361
00:24:21,662 --> 00:24:23,595
Very nice. Hit! Hit it.
362
00:24:23,597 --> 00:24:26,297
Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
363
00:24:26,299 --> 00:24:27,999
Yes!
Whoo!
364
00:24:28,001 --> 00:24:30,402
Richie Rosé.
That's my dude!
365
00:24:33,607 --> 00:24:35,373
It's pretty good, huh?
Smooth.
366
00:24:35,375 --> 00:24:36,675
Smooth.
367
00:24:38,512 --> 00:24:41,112
This is a nice car.
368
00:24:41,114 --> 00:24:43,615
Just like the Mannix car
from the TV show.
369
00:24:43,617 --> 00:24:46,284
I bought it from
my boy, Azam Ghol.
370
00:24:46,286 --> 00:24:48,353
Sounds like someone
from Lord of the Rings.
371
00:24:48,355 --> 00:24:51,790
No, no, no.
He is the real Dark Lord, dude.
372
00:24:51,792 --> 00:24:54,192
This guy, he's an animal.
He butchered what?
373
00:24:54,194 --> 00:24:56,294
Half of southern Afghanistan
back in the day.
374
00:24:56,296 --> 00:24:58,196
But, still, really a cool guy.
Very funny.
375
00:24:58,198 --> 00:25:00,131
Yeah, once you get
to know him, he's great.
376
00:25:00,133 --> 00:25:03,368
He's got an incredible sense of humor.
Get him out in the world.
377
00:25:03,370 --> 00:25:05,403
He threw in these awesome CDs.
378
00:25:05,405 --> 00:25:08,473
Linda Ronstadt, ZZ Top,
379
00:25:08,475 --> 00:25:10,041
Phantom, Cats.
380
00:25:12,679 --> 00:25:15,213
- Don't worry about that.
- Why did you do that?
381
00:25:16,083 --> 00:25:17,816
Was that...
Why did you do that?
382
00:25:17,818 --> 00:25:20,151
- Was that about Cats?
- Hates Broadway.
383
00:25:20,153 --> 00:25:23,254
♪ Jump around
Jump around ♪
384
00:25:23,256 --> 00:25:26,157
♪ Jump up, jump up
and get down ♪
385
00:25:28,662 --> 00:25:30,995
They'll snap at you.
386
00:25:34,334 --> 00:25:36,501
This is fucking scary,
isn't it?
387
00:25:41,007 --> 00:25:43,074
Who would put a club here?
388
00:25:45,846 --> 00:25:48,012
I figure this area
is rent-controlled,
389
00:25:48,014 --> 00:25:51,182
so they're able to keep
the prices really low.
390
00:25:53,019 --> 00:25:56,187
Come through here at Christmastime.
It's all lit up.
391
00:25:56,189 --> 00:25:59,124
The parade goes right through here.
It's beautiful.
392
00:26:01,695 --> 00:26:03,228
They're making us stop.
393
00:26:03,230 --> 00:26:05,470
Yeah, we're good.
Don't worry about this.
394
00:26:33,894 --> 00:26:37,061
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh?
395
00:26:37,063 --> 00:26:38,797
Which uh-oh?
What is happening?
396
00:26:38,799 --> 00:26:41,039
Just Be cool, bro.
Papers.
397
00:26:45,639 --> 00:26:48,072
I... Uh...
398
00:26:48,074 --> 00:26:49,474
Officer.
399
00:26:50,977 --> 00:26:53,645
Uh, time for a crazy story.
400
00:26:53,647 --> 00:26:56,681
Uh, Richie Lanz.
It's a real pleasure.
401
00:26:56,683 --> 00:26:58,583
Um...
402
00:26:58,585 --> 00:27:01,419
I may have been burgled.
403
00:27:01,421 --> 00:27:03,588
My star...
404
00:27:03,590 --> 00:27:07,926
Uh, a singer, like Cher,
405
00:27:07,928 --> 00:27:12,430
seems to have vamoosed
with my passport...
406
00:27:12,432 --> 00:27:14,365
and my money,
407
00:27:14,367 --> 00:27:18,603
and left me here
in a place that I like,
408
00:27:18,605 --> 00:27:21,639
a country that I like
and a village that I admire,
409
00:27:21,641 --> 00:27:23,608
uh...
410
00:27:23,610 --> 00:27:26,211
with no proof or identification
that I am responsible...
411
00:27:26,213 --> 00:27:28,947
for a musical tour
going through here,
412
00:27:28,949 --> 00:27:31,716
playing in your town
and a number of others.
413
00:27:31,718 --> 00:27:35,987
And I'd like for you all to come to
the show as my guests.
414
00:27:35,989 --> 00:27:39,224
- Backstage...
- Get out of the car. Now!
415
00:27:49,636 --> 00:27:53,037
Fuck you! Fuck you!
416
00:27:53,039 --> 00:27:55,206
Those fools shoot
like they dress.
417
00:27:55,208 --> 00:27:57,709
Welcome to the jungle!
418
00:27:59,512 --> 00:28:02,747
Oh, Jesus. Oh, God.
419
00:28:02,749 --> 00:28:05,984
Oh, God.
420
00:28:05,986 --> 00:28:10,521
Volcan!
Volcan! Volcan! Volcan!
421
00:28:10,523 --> 00:28:12,957
I was about
to fall asleep before that.
422
00:28:13,660 --> 00:28:15,180
Here we are.
423
00:28:17,430 --> 00:28:19,197
Thank you, bro.
424
00:28:19,199 --> 00:28:22,000
Oh!
425
00:28:22,002 --> 00:28:25,470
Kenny Loggins?
You're still playing?
426
00:28:29,943 --> 00:28:32,343
You guys had guns?
Oh, hell, yeah, we do.
427
00:28:36,783 --> 00:28:39,617
We good?
428
00:28:42,923 --> 00:28:44,489
What's up, dude?
429
00:28:48,561 --> 00:28:50,228
So you gave them your guns.
430
00:28:50,230 --> 00:28:52,697
Does this mean
we're not in a war zone here?
431
00:28:52,699 --> 00:28:54,465
We're safe here?
We're totally safe.
432
00:28:54,467 --> 00:28:56,401
This is a tough town.
433
00:28:56,403 --> 00:28:59,270
People blowing up all over the place,
a million miles from home. Dirty. Stinky.
434
00:28:59,272 --> 00:29:01,773
We work hard,
but we must also play hard.
435
00:29:01,775 --> 00:29:04,242
Dancing on the edge
of the volcano.
436
00:29:05,645 --> 00:29:06,811
Rula, babe.
437
00:29:06,813 --> 00:29:08,379
Nick, Jake.
438
00:29:08,381 --> 00:29:09,981
Actually, I'm Nick.
He's Jake.
439
00:29:09,983 --> 00:29:12,884
Whatever. Plus one?
Mmm.
440
00:29:19,993 --> 00:29:23,061
No, I can't.
441
00:29:23,063 --> 00:29:24,796
Hey, let's spread out
and find your Ronnie.
442
00:29:24,798 --> 00:29:28,066
I'll grab a beer. She's around here somewhere.
Just keep looking, okay?
443
00:30:02,602 --> 00:30:07,105
♪ Oh, how I'd love to ♪
444
00:30:07,107 --> 00:30:11,376
♪ Let you touch me slowly ♪
445
00:30:11,378 --> 00:30:17,515
♪ Over and under your spell ♪
446
00:30:20,220 --> 00:30:28,220
♪ Oh, how you love to
let me fuck you slowly ♪
447
00:30:28,895 --> 00:30:33,231
♪ Over and under your spell ♪
448
00:30:33,233 --> 00:30:35,566
You the new lifeguard?
449
00:30:39,572 --> 00:30:41,305
Oh.
450
00:30:42,675 --> 00:30:43,841
Oh?
451
00:30:43,843 --> 00:30:47,311
You're not a lifeguard.
You're toast.
452
00:30:48,648 --> 00:30:51,749
Burnt. Singed.
453
00:30:51,751 --> 00:30:53,751
Fried.
454
00:30:55,255 --> 00:30:56,287
High.
455
00:30:59,392 --> 00:31:02,727
♪ Come on, baby
You know how ♪
456
00:31:04,831 --> 00:31:06,764
I like your dress.
457
00:31:07,534 --> 00:31:09,567
I bet.
458
00:31:09,569 --> 00:31:11,135
Sparkly, huh?
459
00:31:16,876 --> 00:31:18,843
I'm Merci with an "I."
460
00:31:23,083 --> 00:31:25,083
Can you sing?
461
00:31:25,885 --> 00:31:27,185
Nope.
462
00:31:27,187 --> 00:31:29,787
But I can fuck you like
a Mouseketeer on crack.
463
00:31:32,025 --> 00:31:33,958
You can?
464
00:31:33,960 --> 00:31:36,461
Sweets,
I can do things to you...
465
00:31:36,463 --> 00:31:39,797
that are illegal in every
civilized nation in the world.
466
00:31:39,799 --> 00:31:43,868
I will leave you broken,
drooling
467
00:31:43,870 --> 00:31:45,937
and speaking in tongues...
468
00:31:45,939 --> 00:31:47,772
like a hillbilly snake handler.
469
00:31:49,542 --> 00:31:50,708
When?
470
00:31:50,710 --> 00:31:52,677
How much money you got?
471
00:31:55,949 --> 00:31:58,282
Well...
472
00:31:58,284 --> 00:32:00,885
I'm in a rented double-wide.
473
00:32:00,887 --> 00:32:02,687
You can ask anybody where.
474
00:32:06,159 --> 00:32:09,894
It's Miss Merci's 401(k)
retirement tour.
475
00:32:09,896 --> 00:32:12,163
You do not wanna miss it.
476
00:32:16,169 --> 00:32:18,369
Keith Haring, 1987.
477
00:32:19,472 --> 00:32:23,908
I bought it off of
John Cougar Mellencamp.
478
00:32:23,910 --> 00:32:25,476
Well, his bass player actually.
479
00:32:26,913 --> 00:32:30,815
- What's your name?
- Richie Lanz.
480
00:32:33,753 --> 00:32:35,520
Buckle up, cowboy.
481
00:32:43,263 --> 00:32:44,829
Miss Merci.
482
00:32:44,831 --> 00:32:47,832
She's, uh,
in the shower, I think.
483
00:32:47,834 --> 00:32:50,001
I suggest you come back...
484
00:32:50,003 --> 00:32:52,284
in maybe an hour
and a half or so.
485
00:32:52,639 --> 00:32:55,640
Uh, Mr. Lanz?
486
00:32:55,642 --> 00:32:57,742
Hey. Private Barnes.
487
00:33:00,547 --> 00:33:02,907
I like what you've done
with your hair, sir.
488
00:33:05,018 --> 00:33:06,918
Well, you're kind to say that.
489
00:33:08,621 --> 00:33:11,622
Uh, well.
Enjoy the rest of your stay.
490
00:33:11,624 --> 00:33:13,391
Will do.
491
00:33:13,393 --> 00:33:15,393
Uh, Private?
Yeah?
492
00:33:17,697 --> 00:33:19,630
Oh. Sure. Sure.
493
00:33:24,804 --> 00:33:26,337
You look kind of nervous.
494
00:33:26,339 --> 00:33:28,859
Probably your first
hostage rescue, huh?
495
00:33:29,409 --> 00:33:31,742
Yes, sir. Here.
496
00:33:31,744 --> 00:33:34,378
No, I can get that one.
Thank you. All right.
497
00:33:35,048 --> 00:33:37,748
Wow.
498
00:33:37,750 --> 00:33:40,484
I ain't never seen any shit like this
before, sir. Good for you.
499
00:33:41,821 --> 00:33:43,821
Well, it's wartime, son.
500
00:33:59,439 --> 00:34:01,572
It's worth the wait.
501
00:34:15,722 --> 00:34:18,089
Hey, bub. Hey, bub.
502
00:34:18,091 --> 00:34:19,657
Going downtown?
503
00:34:25,865 --> 00:34:28,299
I got nothin'.
I've got nothin' for you, guys.
504
00:34:28,301 --> 00:34:31,068
Hashish? No. Never again.
505
00:34:31,070 --> 00:34:34,105
That's final.
Maps! Maps!
506
00:34:34,107 --> 00:34:36,207
Five dollars?
You got to be kidding.
507
00:34:36,209 --> 00:34:38,376
I've got nothing, fellas.
Nothin'.
508
00:34:38,378 --> 00:34:42,647
Look, check my... Here.
Who combs their hair?
509
00:34:42,649 --> 00:34:46,584
Map! Map! You. You got hair.
Here, take it. Kid with the hair.
510
00:34:46,586 --> 00:34:51,055
Hey. Hey! Are you a taxi?
511
00:34:51,057 --> 00:34:52,590
Oh, yes, yes, yes. Sure, sure.
512
00:34:52,592 --> 00:34:56,060
Maps! Maps!
513
00:34:56,062 --> 00:34:57,628
Maps! Maps! Maps!
514
00:34:59,932 --> 00:35:02,412
Thank you.
Yes.
515
00:35:02,735 --> 00:35:04,635
I'm glad you speak
the language.
516
00:35:04,637 --> 00:35:07,571
Yes, yes. I speak. Yes.
I speak American. American.
517
00:35:07,573 --> 00:35:09,707
Where'd you learn?
Yes, yes.
518
00:35:10,677 --> 00:35:12,877
International language of love.
Yes?
519
00:35:13,746 --> 00:35:16,514
Look forward, please.
Oh, yes.
520
00:35:16,516 --> 00:35:18,616
Thank you.
I thought that was French.
521
00:35:18,618 --> 00:35:21,519
No, no, no.
Who sings the disco?
522
00:35:22,422 --> 00:35:24,689
We do, I guess.
The good stuff.
523
00:35:24,691 --> 00:35:27,425
Yes. Yes.
Bionic Boogie, Sylvester,
524
00:35:27,427 --> 00:35:30,795
"Lip Incorporate,"
Madonna...
525
00:35:30,797 --> 00:35:32,763
Hey, an old friend.
526
00:35:33,366 --> 00:35:35,132
You have met Madonna?
527
00:35:35,134 --> 00:35:37,902
"Met" is an understatement.
528
00:35:39,105 --> 00:35:40,671
I love you, Daddy!
529
00:35:40,673 --> 00:35:43,774
- I love you!
- I'm hanging up now.
530
00:35:43,776 --> 00:35:46,711
Please don't hang up.
I'm in a jam. Syl, please. Wait.
531
00:35:46,713 --> 00:35:52,883
I'm stuck in Kabul,
and-and Ronnie left...
532
00:35:52,885 --> 00:35:56,787
and took my passport
and my money...
533
00:35:56,789 --> 00:35:58,689
and my plane ticket.
534
00:36:00,860 --> 00:36:02,893
Yeah, yeah.
535
00:36:02,895 --> 00:36:06,697
I need you to wire me
a few thousand dollars.
536
00:36:06,699 --> 00:36:11,402
Oh. Geez. Sure. Of course.
537
00:36:12,372 --> 00:36:14,372
You're the greatest.
You're aces.
538
00:36:14,374 --> 00:36:15,873
The second you pay me
the two months...
539
00:36:15,875 --> 00:36:19,377
of child support you owe me,
you pathetic piece of shit.
540
00:36:22,315 --> 00:36:24,715
Right. Are you still there?
541
00:36:30,490 --> 00:36:32,690
I need a shower.
Of course, sir.
542
00:36:50,176 --> 00:36:52,176
You smell like pussy.
543
00:36:52,178 --> 00:36:55,012
I'm gonna take that
as a compliment.
544
00:36:55,014 --> 00:36:57,848
Your girl's gone.
545
00:36:57,850 --> 00:37:01,452
I got her out of here last night
on a C-130 to Dubai.
546
00:37:01,454 --> 00:37:05,456
- Why?
- 'Cause she asked me to.
547
00:37:05,458 --> 00:37:07,625
'Cause she asked you to?
548
00:37:07,627 --> 00:37:11,529
Yes. That and the fact that
she paid me a thousand dollars.
549
00:37:11,531 --> 00:37:13,531
My thousand dollars.
550
00:37:13,533 --> 00:37:17,101
That's half my fee.
She said you'd pay me the rest.
551
00:37:17,103 --> 00:37:20,404
No and no.
552
00:37:20,406 --> 00:37:23,374
I have no money, no passport...
553
00:37:23,376 --> 00:37:26,710
One thousand. American. Now.
554
00:37:26,712 --> 00:37:29,079
I assume you'll take
a personal check.
555
00:37:29,081 --> 00:37:32,049
I assume you'll take
a bullet to the foot.
556
00:37:33,453 --> 00:37:35,386
Look, Mr. Bombay...
557
00:37:35,388 --> 00:37:37,955
Or, uh, do you go by
"Mumbai" now?
558
00:37:37,957 --> 00:37:41,025
Twenty-four hours.
You pay me or you die.
559
00:37:44,464 --> 00:37:46,864
You don't deserve
a talent like that.
560
00:37:47,733 --> 00:37:50,734
She begged you to let her
sing her own songs.
561
00:37:52,138 --> 00:37:54,905
You force her to sing
that stupid cover shit.
562
00:37:56,242 --> 00:37:57,741
Creative suicide.
563
00:37:57,743 --> 00:38:02,112
"A"... It's called
"management strategy."
564
00:38:02,114 --> 00:38:04,181
And two...
565
00:38:04,183 --> 00:38:07,785
Why don't you get me my passport
and wallet back for the $1,000?
566
00:38:07,787 --> 00:38:10,354
How about if I punch a hole
through your heart right now?
567
00:38:10,356 --> 00:38:12,189
Get out of my way.
568
00:38:13,426 --> 00:38:15,159
Twenty-four hours!
569
00:38:18,297 --> 00:38:19,897
One day.
570
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:23,501
You're repeating yourself.
571
00:38:24,937 --> 00:38:27,638
♪ Come down off your throne ♪
572
00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:31,675
♪ And leave your body alone ♪
573
00:38:31,677 --> 00:38:37,214
♪ You are the reason
I've been waiting so long ♪
574
00:38:39,318 --> 00:38:44,622
♪ Somebody holds the key ♪
575
00:38:46,125 --> 00:38:49,860
♪ But I'm near the end ♪
576
00:38:49,862 --> 00:38:56,400
♪ And I just
ain't got the time ♪
577
00:38:56,402 --> 00:38:58,135
♪ And I'm wasted ♪
578
00:38:58,137 --> 00:39:02,139
♪ And I can't
find my way home ♪♪
579
00:39:02,141 --> 00:39:03,674
It's ridiculous! Woodstock...
580
00:39:03,676 --> 00:39:06,143
Jimi Hendrix played
The Star Spangled Banner...
581
00:39:06,145 --> 00:39:08,712
because I asked him to!
582
00:39:10,483 --> 00:39:12,883
Two weeks...
583
00:39:12,885 --> 00:39:15,352
to get a passport
to my own country.
584
00:39:15,354 --> 00:39:17,488
Hey...
585
00:39:17,490 --> 00:39:21,692
Could you please turn down
the "Boogie Oogie Oogie Oogie"?
586
00:39:21,694 --> 00:39:23,994
Hey, boss. How about lunch?
587
00:39:23,996 --> 00:39:25,596
Do you like Mexican?
588
00:39:26,499 --> 00:39:28,399
Mexican's fine.
589
00:39:28,401 --> 00:39:30,100
But no food.
590
00:39:30,102 --> 00:39:34,204
Madonna?
Please. Donna.
591
00:39:34,206 --> 00:39:38,042
Donna Elaine Beckerman.
Grosse Pointe, Michigan.
592
00:39:38,044 --> 00:39:40,945
- I gave her the name Madonna.
- That's why you are a very famous man.
593
00:39:40,947 --> 00:39:44,181
- Saw her singing on the street.
- Yes. The Hamburger Hamlet.
594
00:39:44,183 --> 00:39:45,749
On Sunset.
595
00:39:46,519 --> 00:39:48,118
Legendary ears.
596
00:39:49,589 --> 00:39:51,622
Oh. Mr. Richie.
597
00:39:53,192 --> 00:39:55,526
Tonight is Afghan Star.
598
00:39:55,528 --> 00:39:57,261
On TV.
599
00:39:59,432 --> 00:40:01,765
Afghan Star?
Yes. Big TV show.
600
00:40:01,767 --> 00:40:04,702
Like your American Idol.
601
00:40:04,704 --> 00:40:06,470
Huge competition
for our singers.
602
00:40:06,472 --> 00:40:08,639
He is favorite.
603
00:40:10,042 --> 00:40:14,411
All of Afghanistan,
they watch it and they vote it.
604
00:40:14,413 --> 00:40:16,714
For money?
Yes, of course.
605
00:40:16,716 --> 00:40:21,318
Winner gets $5,000 American
and record deal.
606
00:40:22,321 --> 00:40:24,788
I dig the suit. Retro.
607
00:40:24,790 --> 00:40:28,292
Hey. Uncle Rich, we've got to get out of here.
We've got something better than this.
608
00:40:28,294 --> 00:40:31,128
It's there! It's there!
Whoa!
609
00:40:31,897 --> 00:40:33,564
Whoa! Look at that, huh?
610
00:40:33,566 --> 00:40:36,166
Three months I've been trying to get
that fucking thing to spiral.
611
00:40:39,438 --> 00:40:41,071
Here you go.
612
00:40:42,908 --> 00:40:46,210
- What's that for?
- That's some gangster shit.
613
00:40:47,346 --> 00:40:49,179
Just consider it a lifetime
achievement award.
614
00:40:49,181 --> 00:40:51,115
Look, I think what
he's trying to say...
615
00:40:51,117 --> 00:40:55,419
is that, ultimately, you are our arms man,
and you are in trouble.
616
00:40:55,421 --> 00:40:57,254
That's about $15,000.
617
00:40:57,256 --> 00:40:59,189
Not enough?
618
00:41:06,932 --> 00:41:09,600
- What do you guys want?
- Fucking mind reader.
619
00:41:09,602 --> 00:41:10,668
Clairvoyant.
620
00:41:10,670 --> 00:41:12,202
Okay, what we're looking for...
621
00:41:12,204 --> 00:41:14,605
is a little of that
Richie Lanz closing magic.
622
00:41:14,607 --> 00:41:16,607
You see, we're, uh...
we're double-booked.
623
00:41:16,609 --> 00:41:18,609
What my partner
is trying to say...
624
00:41:18,611 --> 00:41:20,811
is that we are
tied up here in Kabul.
625
00:41:20,813 --> 00:41:22,446
But we got a shipment
due in Patkia...
626
00:41:22,448 --> 00:41:23,647
Today.
Yep.
627
00:41:23,649 --> 00:41:26,116
Today, Rich. Okay?
It's just a few hours south.
628
00:41:26,118 --> 00:41:28,218
We will send some security
just for show.
629
00:41:28,220 --> 00:41:31,121
Totally not necessary.
This is a sweet Pashtun village.
630
00:41:31,123 --> 00:41:36,126
Rich, these... These are
the very good guys, okay?
631
00:41:36,128 --> 00:41:37,961
All they need is a few thousand rounds
of ammunition...
632
00:41:37,963 --> 00:41:40,030
to defend their village.
633
00:41:40,032 --> 00:41:43,000
We gotta help these guys.
Of course we gotta help these guys.
634
00:41:43,002 --> 00:41:45,502
It's what we do, right?
It's why we're here. Mm-hmm.
635
00:41:45,504 --> 00:41:47,971
It's why we are
all here, okay?
636
00:41:47,973 --> 00:41:51,008
Look, we need somebody
we can trust, all right? An American.
637
00:41:51,010 --> 00:41:52,910
Mm-hmm.
That we can trust.
638
00:41:52,912 --> 00:41:56,180
You drive down, you do the meet and greet,
get paid, obviously, see the sights.
639
00:41:56,182 --> 00:41:58,716
And they're wonderful sights.
The road trip is absolutely incredible.
640
00:41:58,718 --> 00:42:02,219
There's amazing rock formations.
It's like Arizona. Really, really pretty.
641
00:42:02,221 --> 00:42:04,988
And you'll be back at L'Volcan tonight
for cocktail hour.
642
00:42:04,990 --> 00:42:07,550
A tourist trip.
Totally. You got a camera?
643
00:42:10,863 --> 00:42:13,831
Why would I ever do that?
644
00:42:13,833 --> 00:42:16,767
- Love this guy.
- Cool head in a tight spot.
645
00:42:16,769 --> 00:42:19,670
Why would you ever do that?
You think we didn't think about this?
646
00:42:19,672 --> 00:42:21,205
Obviously we did.
We thought about you.
647
00:42:21,207 --> 00:42:23,006
And then we thought about
your current situation.
648
00:42:23,008 --> 00:42:26,276
Look, Rich, the US Embassy,
if pushed, can issue...
649
00:42:26,278 --> 00:42:28,512
what they like to call
a "limited-validity" passport.
650
00:42:28,514 --> 00:42:30,848
Like right now.
Ahora. Right the fuck now.
651
00:42:30,850 --> 00:42:33,083
We can have it
in your hands tonight.
652
00:42:33,085 --> 00:42:35,018
No questions asked.
No.
653
00:42:35,020 --> 00:42:37,521
Like I said, we can and will
make that happen for you.
654
00:42:37,523 --> 00:42:40,958
Now, it's only good for a year,
but it will get you home.
655
00:42:43,596 --> 00:42:45,195
And it's safe?
656
00:42:45,197 --> 00:42:48,197
It's safe as milk.
657
00:42:52,304 --> 00:42:55,739
Thirty clicks from our
destination out on the Gardez road.
658
00:42:55,741 --> 00:42:58,442
The mission today is
a simple stop and drop.
659
00:43:00,045 --> 00:43:03,914
We got a Hollywood agent
in the truck with us today.
660
00:43:03,916 --> 00:43:06,350
Let's see if we can't
keep him alive.
661
00:43:07,586 --> 00:43:09,386
You say you're shopping
a book deal.
662
00:43:09,388 --> 00:43:13,457
You happen to be sitting next to
a very well-connected hombre.
663
00:43:14,593 --> 00:43:16,126
Connected to who?
664
00:43:16,128 --> 00:43:19,229
- Danielle Steel.
- Bullshit.
665
00:43:19,231 --> 00:43:21,565
- We dated.
- Get the fuck out of here.
666
00:43:21,567 --> 00:43:23,433
Seriously.
No way.
667
00:43:23,435 --> 00:43:27,070
- Back in the Bay Area.
- You dated Danielle Steel?
668
00:43:27,072 --> 00:43:28,472
Mm-hmm.
669
00:43:30,576 --> 00:43:32,142
You fuck her?
670
00:43:33,746 --> 00:43:35,779
Twice.
671
00:43:35,781 --> 00:43:38,148
I read Passion's Promise.
672
00:43:39,318 --> 00:43:41,318
A lot of sex.
673
00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:45,422
- She had beautiful hair, didn't she?
- Back then.
674
00:43:45,424 --> 00:43:48,625
Now I think she's wearing wigs.
And cheap ones. Really.
675
00:43:48,627 --> 00:43:50,594
Like dime-store ones.
676
00:43:50,596 --> 00:43:53,030
Synthetic?
677
00:43:53,032 --> 00:43:55,032
You know, she's got
the money to spend.
678
00:43:55,034 --> 00:43:57,354
I don't know why
she doesn't do it.
679
00:44:04,977 --> 00:44:08,612
- Come on!
- Mr. Richie! Mr. Richie!
680
00:44:08,614 --> 00:44:10,113
Mr. Richie!
681
00:44:10,115 --> 00:44:12,349
The fucking truck is on fire.
Get out of there!
682
00:44:12,351 --> 00:44:15,319
Let's go. Get up!
Get up! Let's go.
683
00:44:15,321 --> 00:44:17,988
Get up! Yo, anybody hit?
Anybody hit?
684
00:44:17,990 --> 00:44:22,292
Baba? Get It On John?
Everybody all right?
685
00:44:22,294 --> 00:44:24,695
Where you going?
Mr. Richie! You are blown up?
686
00:44:24,697 --> 00:44:27,364
Richie! Where are you going?
687
00:44:29,134 --> 00:44:31,334
- Mr. Richie!
- Hey!
688
00:44:32,238 --> 00:44:35,572
The fuck you going?
Get that gear out of the car.
689
00:44:36,976 --> 00:44:38,742
Whoa, Hollywood!
Where are you going?
690
00:44:38,744 --> 00:44:40,377
Hey!
691
00:44:41,881 --> 00:44:44,882
Hey! The fuck you going?
692
00:44:56,095 --> 00:44:58,595
Where are you going?
This wasn't the deal.
693
00:44:59,765 --> 00:45:03,667
What?
694
00:45:03,669 --> 00:45:05,168
This wasn't the deal.
695
00:45:05,170 --> 00:45:07,330
The deal was...
696
00:45:08,540 --> 00:45:11,074
The deal was safe as milk.
697
00:45:11,076 --> 00:45:13,343
Was the deal. Safe as milk.
698
00:45:13,345 --> 00:45:15,913
Let's go. Let's go.
Let's get out of here.
699
00:45:15,915 --> 00:45:18,181
Not getting blown to hell.
700
00:45:18,183 --> 00:45:22,185
Milk? Do these look
like milk trucks?
701
00:45:22,187 --> 00:45:24,254
Do I look like a milkman?
702
00:45:24,256 --> 00:45:26,857
I don't like the tone
of your voice.
703
00:45:26,859 --> 00:45:28,892
You're not gonna
get out of here without us.
704
00:45:28,894 --> 00:45:30,928
You're not gonna
get five clicks out of here.
705
00:45:31,530 --> 00:45:33,463
What's a click?
706
00:45:33,465 --> 00:45:36,199
It's a unit of measurement
in the desert.
707
00:45:36,201 --> 00:45:38,702
Mr. Richie... Heads up. Heads up.
What do you got?
708
00:45:38,704 --> 00:45:40,637
Horses. Horses, Mr. Richie.
709
00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:49,947
Oh, fuck.
710
00:45:53,085 --> 00:45:55,519
Come on out. Come on.
711
00:46:01,727 --> 00:46:03,794
We should have taken horses.
712
00:46:07,900 --> 00:46:10,500
They are my people. Yes.
713
00:46:11,603 --> 00:46:14,204
It's okay. They're Pashtun.
714
00:46:31,090 --> 00:46:34,257
Where you goin'?
To close this deal.
715
00:46:36,762 --> 00:46:38,428
Hey.
716
00:46:38,430 --> 00:46:40,097
Richie Lanz.
717
00:46:40,099 --> 00:46:42,632
Talent manager
of Van Nuys, California.
718
00:46:42,634 --> 00:46:44,668
Soon to be in Beverly Hills.
719
00:46:44,670 --> 00:46:46,269
How y'all doing, guys?
720
00:46:46,271 --> 00:46:49,506
As-salaam alaikum.
721
00:46:52,444 --> 00:46:54,411
Back at you, babe.
722
00:47:09,395 --> 00:47:11,128
We got all the stuff
you asked for.
723
00:47:11,130 --> 00:47:14,164
Everything's here.
It's all boxed real nice.
724
00:47:14,166 --> 00:47:16,199
Bows. The whole thing.
725
00:47:19,571 --> 00:47:20,731
Heads up.
726
00:47:23,375 --> 00:47:25,872
- Yes. He's cool.
- We done, champ?
727
00:47:25,873 --> 00:47:30,542
No, I think... Uh, everything but the,
uh... the money. It's good.
728
00:47:30,543 --> 00:47:33,754
Uh, okay, I guess
you've got what you need.
729
00:47:33,758 --> 00:47:36,759
There's just the matter
of an account balance.
730
00:47:52,679 --> 00:47:55,072
Is he... Is he stiffing me?
731
00:48:04,881 --> 00:48:07,552
He is not on our side.
732
00:48:07,556 --> 00:48:10,630
Yeah, I think I know
a good cop, bad cop when I see it.
733
00:48:25,032 --> 00:48:28,107
He wants to pay you
over tea at his home.
734
00:48:30,305 --> 00:48:32,575
Tea?
Yes. And then dinner.
735
00:48:32,578 --> 00:48:34,644
And then he would like us
to spend the night.
736
00:48:34,646 --> 00:48:37,314
It is an incredible honor,
Mr. Richie.
737
00:48:39,818 --> 00:48:41,418
I don't know.
738
00:48:41,420 --> 00:48:43,920
If you refuse,
he will be honor-bound...
739
00:48:43,922 --> 00:48:45,755
to hunt you down and kill you,
740
00:48:45,757 --> 00:48:49,259
and then hunt down
your family and kill them.
741
00:48:50,963 --> 00:48:55,799
I'm thinking.
742
00:48:57,102 --> 00:48:59,236
First you lose your girl.
743
00:48:59,238 --> 00:49:02,005
Now you're gonna
lose your head.
744
00:49:02,007 --> 00:49:04,741
You're running out of shit
to lose.
745
00:49:04,743 --> 00:49:07,811
Baba, Johnny,
get this shit off the truck.
746
00:49:07,813 --> 00:49:09,579
Let's get out of here.
747
00:49:12,918 --> 00:49:16,753
In my country we often say
thank you with a song.
748
00:49:16,755 --> 00:49:20,157
Ready? Ready?
Ready?
749
00:49:20,159 --> 00:49:24,294
♪ Smoke on the water ♪
750
00:49:24,296 --> 00:49:28,765
♪ Fire in the night sky ♪
751
00:49:28,767 --> 00:49:32,269
♪ Smoke on the water ♪
752
00:49:32,271 --> 00:49:37,340
♪ Fire in the sky, yeah ♪
753
00:49:50,889 --> 00:49:53,356
Bring it home!
754
00:49:53,358 --> 00:49:57,460
♪ Smoke on the water ♪
755
00:49:57,462 --> 00:50:00,463
♪ Fire in the night ♪
756
00:50:00,465 --> 00:50:05,368
♪ Smoke on the water ♪
757
00:50:05,370 --> 00:50:07,704
♪ Fire in the night ♪
758
00:50:07,706 --> 00:50:09,472
Come on. Bring it down!
759
00:50:42,374 --> 00:50:43,807
Good night, everybody.
760
00:50:45,844 --> 00:50:47,410
Thank you.
761
00:50:49,181 --> 00:50:50,914
Thank you very much.
762
00:51:03,695 --> 00:51:06,129
"Everything that we have"...
763
00:51:09,735 --> 00:51:13,136
"All the wealth of my village,
for what?"
764
00:51:15,540 --> 00:51:17,974
"To buy more bullets,
more guns."
765
00:51:20,912 --> 00:51:22,846
"We are surrounded by enemies."
766
00:51:26,051 --> 00:51:28,318
"The mujahideen warlords."
767
00:51:31,056 --> 00:51:33,256
"Azam Ghol
is my Pashtun brother."
768
00:51:38,130 --> 00:51:42,732
"He comes to take my village,
and he wants us to grow the poppy."
769
00:51:46,271 --> 00:51:48,938
"Twenty-five years of killing."
770
00:51:53,578 --> 00:51:56,479
"I am tired of war,
and I cannot afford the peace."
771
00:52:05,624 --> 00:52:07,991
"Allah helps the innocent."
772
00:52:10,195 --> 00:52:11,828
We have a saying:
773
00:52:14,199 --> 00:52:16,933
"The Lord works
in mysterious ways."
774
00:52:49,668 --> 00:52:51,201
♪ Trouble ♪
775
00:52:51,203 --> 00:52:55,805
♪ Oh, trouble, set me free ♪
776
00:52:57,576 --> 00:52:59,876
♪ I have seen your face ♪
777
00:52:59,878 --> 00:53:03,413
♪ And it's too much,
too much for me ♪
778
00:53:06,852 --> 00:53:08,651
♪ Trouble ♪
779
00:53:08,653 --> 00:53:13,089
♪ Oh, trouble, can't you see? ♪
780
00:53:14,326 --> 00:53:16,659
♪ You're eating my heart away ♪
781
00:53:16,661 --> 00:53:20,463
♪ And there's nothing much
left of me ♪
782
00:53:23,068 --> 00:53:26,503
♪ I've ♪
783
00:53:26,505 --> 00:53:29,372
♪ Drunk your wine ♪
784
00:53:29,374 --> 00:53:33,109
♪ You have made
your world mine ♪
785
00:53:33,111 --> 00:53:37,180
♪ So won't you be fair? ♪
786
00:53:37,182 --> 00:53:39,983
♪ So won't you be fair? ♪
787
00:53:42,220 --> 00:53:45,355
♪ I ♪
788
00:53:45,357 --> 00:53:48,691
♪ Don't want no more of you ♪
789
00:53:48,693 --> 00:53:52,362
♪ So won't you be kind to me? ♪
790
00:53:52,364 --> 00:53:55,031
♪ Just let me go where ♪
791
00:53:55,867 --> 00:53:59,102
♪ I'll have to go there ♪♪
792
00:54:26,131 --> 00:54:28,498
Well, la-di-da.
793
00:54:33,638 --> 00:54:35,919
Taxi.
794
00:54:38,944 --> 00:54:43,079
I heard a girl
singing just now.
795
00:54:43,081 --> 00:54:45,114
Right over there.
796
00:54:45,116 --> 00:54:46,916
A Pashtun girl.
797
00:54:46,918 --> 00:54:49,052
No. Impossible.
798
00:54:50,088 --> 00:54:53,490
The girl in the red burka.
We saw her today.
799
00:54:53,492 --> 00:54:55,258
No, Pashtun women cannot.
800
00:54:55,260 --> 00:54:57,026
They are forbidden to sing.
801
00:54:57,028 --> 00:55:00,997
The chick in the red burka
didn't get the memo.
802
00:55:01,933 --> 00:55:03,867
This girl...
803
00:55:05,103 --> 00:55:08,538
Oh! Oh, God. Oh!
804
00:55:08,540 --> 00:55:11,140
This girl...
805
00:55:11,142 --> 00:55:14,444
Riza, Richie Lanz is about one thing,
one thing only.
806
00:55:14,446 --> 00:55:16,846
What is it?
Your ears.
807
00:55:16,848 --> 00:55:18,248
My ears.
808
00:55:19,451 --> 00:55:21,684
And signing.
809
00:55:21,686 --> 00:55:24,787
So it's two things.
My ears and signing.
810
00:55:24,789 --> 00:55:28,224
I hear 'em, and I sign 'em.
811
00:55:28,226 --> 00:55:30,026
So simple.
812
00:55:31,530 --> 00:55:34,831
A Pashtun woman?
From this village?
813
00:55:34,833 --> 00:55:38,553
They will kill her,
and then right away, they will kill us.
814
00:55:39,070 --> 00:55:43,973
With big, sharp rocks.
That is simple.
815
00:55:46,211 --> 00:55:48,511
Well, I think you're wrong.
I hope you're wrong.
816
00:55:48,513 --> 00:55:50,480
And I think you're wrong.
817
00:55:50,482 --> 00:55:53,316
Look around. Look at that.
818
00:55:53,318 --> 00:55:54,884
Look at that.
819
00:55:55,820 --> 00:55:58,655
Look at that.
Look at all of that.
820
00:55:58,657 --> 00:56:00,823
And look at me.
821
00:56:00,825 --> 00:56:03,259
What the hell am I doing here?
822
00:56:04,329 --> 00:56:06,329
This is so crazy, so random.
823
00:56:06,331 --> 00:56:08,331
This has got to be fate.
824
00:56:08,333 --> 00:56:10,767
There's got to be
a reason for this.
825
00:56:10,769 --> 00:56:14,170
And the reason is that girl...
826
00:56:14,172 --> 00:56:17,273
and that TV show.
827
00:56:18,176 --> 00:56:21,678
I am supposed to be here.
828
00:56:23,114 --> 00:56:26,449
I will talk.
829
00:56:26,451 --> 00:56:30,086
You will translate.
830
00:56:30,088 --> 00:56:32,622
We will die.
831
00:56:34,359 --> 00:56:36,593
That's the spirit.
832
00:56:38,096 --> 00:56:42,699
I see that none of you
are cable or satellite subscribers.
833
00:56:43,468 --> 00:56:45,868
But I'm pretty sure...
834
00:56:45,870 --> 00:56:48,871
you've heard about
Afghan Star, huh?
835
00:56:48,873 --> 00:56:53,376
It's a big, big hit.
836
00:56:53,378 --> 00:56:54,978
TV show that comes out of Kabul.
837
00:56:56,748 --> 00:56:58,615
Heard about it.
Heard about it.
838
00:56:58,617 --> 00:57:01,284
Well, I happen to have
these babies right here.
839
00:57:03,822 --> 00:57:06,656
They're like yours,
but they're magic.
840
00:57:10,161 --> 00:57:13,796
And I already know
who the winner is.
841
00:57:15,433 --> 00:57:19,969
I know who's the best,
'cause I heard the winner here last night.
842
00:57:19,971 --> 00:57:22,672
In a cave above your village.
843
00:57:27,512 --> 00:57:30,146
My all-time guy
would simply tell us,
844
00:57:30,148 --> 00:57:33,816
"Come together, right now,
over her."
845
00:57:39,257 --> 00:57:42,759
Uh, she is Tariq's daughter.
She is Tariq's daughter. Of course.
846
00:57:42,761 --> 00:57:44,601
Get out!
847
00:57:45,497 --> 00:57:48,831
He... Is he proud?
He's got to be.
848
00:57:50,001 --> 00:57:52,702
"How dare you
my daughter insult?
849
00:57:53,438 --> 00:57:55,772
Shame. Dishonor.
850
00:57:55,774 --> 00:57:57,740
Eternal death."
851
00:57:58,943 --> 00:58:01,678
I mean, he just goes on, sir.
852
00:58:04,816 --> 00:58:06,649
So I guess that's a "no."
853
00:58:19,864 --> 00:58:22,198
Great. A flat tire.
854
00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:24,133
See? We are cursed.
855
00:58:24,135 --> 00:58:27,470
Oh, come on.
It's a flat tire.
856
00:58:27,472 --> 00:58:30,473
I'm sure you know
how to fix it.
857
00:58:41,519 --> 00:58:43,152
- A ninja!
- Salima.
858
00:58:44,756 --> 00:58:47,023
I must go to Kabul.
859
00:58:47,025 --> 00:58:49,525
Allah gave me this voice.
This is his gift.
860
00:58:49,527 --> 00:58:52,395
Absolutely.
861
00:58:52,397 --> 00:58:54,564
But why are you in my trunk?
862
00:58:54,566 --> 00:58:57,033
I must honor him
with my music.
863
00:58:57,035 --> 00:58:59,435
I must celebrate my God
with my singing.
864
00:58:59,437 --> 00:59:01,604
I must go to Kabul. I must.
865
00:59:01,606 --> 00:59:03,539
Hey, you're preaching
to the choir,
866
00:59:03,541 --> 00:59:07,944
but, you know, your father, family,
apparently will kill me.
867
00:59:07,946 --> 00:59:11,380
Then it is Allah's will,
and we shall die together.
868
00:59:11,382 --> 00:59:14,050
No. No, we shall not.
869
00:59:14,052 --> 00:59:17,754
I have no intention of dying,
ever.
870
00:59:18,723 --> 00:59:20,423
Tell her, Riza.
871
00:59:28,199 --> 00:59:30,399
Kabul?
872
00:59:30,401 --> 00:59:32,001
That way.
873
00:59:38,042 --> 00:59:41,177
Hold it right there, Salima.
874
00:59:43,581 --> 00:59:46,215
From the moment
you heard me sing,
875
00:59:46,217 --> 00:59:48,050
since you found me
in the cave,
876
00:59:48,052 --> 00:59:50,219
since we were put here
on this earth,
877
00:59:50,221 --> 00:59:55,224
everything in our lives
has led us to this time, this place.
878
00:59:55,226 --> 00:59:58,895
Richie Lanz,
our story is already written,
879
00:59:58,897 --> 01:00:03,299
and now... now
we shall play our parts.
880
01:00:03,301 --> 01:00:07,203
We must. There is no choice.
It is God's will.
881
01:00:12,510 --> 01:00:14,910
Okay, but I'm
gonna want 20%.
882
01:00:19,317 --> 01:00:21,784
No contract.
883
01:00:21,786 --> 01:00:24,954
Just a handshake.
That's all I've ever had.
884
01:00:24,956 --> 01:00:27,156
A handshake is my word.
885
01:00:29,327 --> 01:00:32,028
Allah loves those
who act justly.
886
01:00:38,269 --> 01:00:41,003
All right.
Back in the trunk.
887
01:00:43,174 --> 01:00:44,841
I'm kidding.
888
01:00:44,843 --> 01:00:46,609
♪ People ♪
889
01:00:46,611 --> 01:00:48,945
♪ Do you understand me now? ♪
890
01:00:50,348 --> 01:00:54,016
♪ Sometimes I feel
a little mad ♪
891
01:00:55,787 --> 01:00:58,120
♪ Don't you know no one alive ♪
892
01:00:58,122 --> 01:01:01,490
♪ Can always be an angel ♪
893
01:01:01,492 --> 01:01:05,194
♪ When things go wrong,
I seem a little sad ♪
894
01:01:06,397 --> 01:01:12,568
♪ But I'm just a soul
whose intentions are good ♪
895
01:01:12,570 --> 01:01:18,541
♪ Oh, Lord, please don't
let me be misunderstood ♪♪
896
01:01:24,148 --> 01:01:27,416
A guy wouldn't have
to walk that far.
897
01:01:30,154 --> 01:01:32,274
I must speak.
898
01:01:32,757 --> 01:01:36,325
Sure. We have time.
899
01:01:36,327 --> 01:01:40,596
I think you are a smart man,
Mr. Richie, and a good one.
900
01:01:41,399 --> 01:01:43,599
All right.
Calm down.
901
01:01:44,535 --> 01:01:47,236
Salima is in danger.
902
01:01:47,238 --> 01:01:48,771
I will protect her.
903
01:01:48,773 --> 01:01:52,508
Against millions?
Where will she even sleep?
904
01:01:52,510 --> 01:01:54,710
I have one bed, one room.
905
01:01:54,712 --> 01:01:58,514
If I bring an unmarried Pashtun
girl in my building,
906
01:01:58,516 --> 01:02:01,083
my neighbors would
tear us apart for the sin.
907
01:02:02,220 --> 01:02:06,689
Do you remember
where we first met?
908
01:02:09,460 --> 01:02:11,127
70-30.
909
01:02:11,129 --> 01:02:13,496
You pay room and board,
all out of pocket.
910
01:02:16,467 --> 01:02:18,134
Done.
911
01:02:18,136 --> 01:02:20,870
I also get a taste
of all the merch money.
912
01:02:20,872 --> 01:02:23,940
And I get a taste
of the merch.
913
01:02:23,942 --> 01:02:26,342
In all markets,
all endeavors.
914
01:02:27,478 --> 01:02:29,478
Boys, it's your lucky day.
915
01:02:29,480 --> 01:02:32,481
All right, none of you are leaving here
with a vicious STD.
916
01:02:32,483 --> 01:02:36,218
Downside...
Miss Merci's pulling an early retirement.
917
01:02:36,220 --> 01:02:37,887
Hangin' up my hot pants.
918
01:02:37,889 --> 01:02:41,557
I suggest you go down to the Chinese
whorehouse on Chicken Street.
919
01:02:43,728 --> 01:02:45,995
Breakfast, darlin'?
920
01:02:45,997 --> 01:02:50,833
Got Captain Crunch,
Lucky Charms.
921
01:02:50,835 --> 01:02:53,002
I come here for the waitress.
922
01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:59,168
Scared is normal.
Scared is okay.
923
01:03:59,170 --> 01:04:02,571
Jon Bon Jovi throws up
before every show.
924
01:04:06,244 --> 01:04:08,644
We're on the list.
Lanz, plus one.
925
01:04:13,017 --> 01:04:14,583
There is no list.
926
01:04:16,821 --> 01:04:18,387
There's always a list.
927
01:04:18,389 --> 01:04:20,990
I appreciate
your passion, but...
928
01:04:20,992 --> 01:04:23,492
Not my passion.
Salima's passion.
929
01:04:23,494 --> 01:04:25,361
I mean, I'm just
a hustler from LA.
930
01:04:25,363 --> 01:04:27,263
You know what's gonna happen
to a Pashtun girl...
931
01:04:27,265 --> 01:04:29,532
that sings on national TV
in this country?
932
01:04:29,534 --> 01:04:33,335
What her family is gonna do, her father?
It's already done.
933
01:04:33,337 --> 01:04:36,372
Just the fact that her coming here,
it's done.
934
01:04:36,374 --> 01:04:38,908
Look... And yet,
she knows this,
935
01:04:38,910 --> 01:04:42,445
and here she stands in front of you
just asking for a chance.
936
01:04:42,447 --> 01:04:45,014
Just asking for you
to give her a chance.
937
01:04:45,016 --> 01:04:46,715
If the ulema
doesn't shut us down,
938
01:04:46,717 --> 01:04:49,351
if the ministry of information
doesn't throw me in jail,
939
01:04:49,353 --> 01:04:51,720
there will be
another season, Mr. Lanz.
940
01:04:51,722 --> 01:04:56,192
Call me later.
There is no later for Salima, or for you...
941
01:04:56,194 --> 01:04:58,294
or your country.
942
01:04:58,296 --> 01:05:03,065
If you let this girl
sing on national TV,
943
01:05:03,067 --> 01:05:06,068
if you let the Afghan people
see her courage...
944
01:05:06,070 --> 01:05:08,370
Stop. Stop!
And to hear her voice...
945
01:05:08,372 --> 01:05:12,475
No! You do not lecture me about courage,
about my country.
946
01:05:12,477 --> 01:05:14,210
Never. Never.
947
01:05:14,212 --> 01:05:16,045
Not you. Not an American.
948
01:05:16,047 --> 01:05:17,546
You people. You talk and talk.
949
01:05:17,548 --> 01:05:20,082
Have been talking at us
for far too long.
950
01:05:20,084 --> 01:05:21,717
Courage?
951
01:05:21,719 --> 01:05:25,721
There are more death threats
on this show than singers.
952
01:05:25,723 --> 01:05:27,156
Touché.
953
01:05:27,158 --> 01:05:29,058
Michael Jackson.
954
01:05:29,060 --> 01:05:32,561
Pink Floyd. The Eagles.
955
01:05:32,563 --> 01:05:35,731
The Bee Gees.
Saturday Night Fever album.
956
01:05:35,733 --> 01:05:37,733
Fleetwood Mac.
957
01:05:37,735 --> 01:05:39,568
Miss Whitney Houston.
958
01:05:39,570 --> 01:05:42,738
They're all giants.
Demigods.
959
01:05:42,740 --> 01:05:47,176
They all crushed... crushed
40 million units or more.
960
01:05:47,178 --> 01:05:49,078
Forty million units.
961
01:05:49,080 --> 01:05:52,581
Now, you work too hard
for me not to say this.
962
01:05:52,583 --> 01:05:55,985
I consider you my new friend
in Afghanistan.
963
01:05:55,987 --> 01:05:58,587
I want you to consider me...
964
01:06:00,024 --> 01:06:01,857
your new partner.
965
01:06:03,261 --> 01:06:06,529
Now, I have an 80-20...
966
01:06:06,531 --> 01:06:09,498
that's been stepped on
by a preexisting 70-30.
967
01:06:09,500 --> 01:06:12,768
But your 15 against my 85...
968
01:06:12,770 --> 01:06:15,137
puts us both in a palace
in the hills, my friend.
969
01:06:15,139 --> 01:06:16,939
And those numbers
can be massaged.
970
01:06:16,941 --> 01:06:18,674
But the first thing...
971
01:06:20,044 --> 01:06:22,578
You got to just
hear the girl sing.
972
01:06:35,293 --> 01:06:37,326
Richie, the judges
want to know...
973
01:06:37,328 --> 01:06:39,161
if Salima will be
only singing in English.
974
01:06:39,163 --> 01:06:40,663
That's never happened before.
975
01:06:40,665 --> 01:06:44,400
Well, I'm afraid so.
It's a touching story.
976
01:06:44,402 --> 01:06:47,169
She learned from a seriously
wounded American GI...
977
01:06:47,171 --> 01:06:48,804
who was trapped in her village.
978
01:06:48,806 --> 01:06:52,007
As she nursed him back to health,
he taught her one word a day,
979
01:06:52,009 --> 01:06:54,944
until finally,
the music of the West.
980
01:06:56,480 --> 01:07:00,983
None of that's true. I mean,
apparently there was a soldier.
981
01:07:00,985 --> 01:07:03,185
So only Cat Stevens?
982
01:07:03,187 --> 01:07:05,187
And Jimmy Cliff.
983
01:07:05,189 --> 01:07:07,189
She does the Muslim West.
That's it.
984
01:07:43,027 --> 01:07:44,693
What?
985
01:07:45,529 --> 01:07:48,430
What'd that twerp say?
Nothing.
986
01:07:50,534 --> 01:07:53,202
I'm gonna go kill him, just in case.
No, Richie.
987
01:07:53,204 --> 01:07:56,071
All right,
when you're done,
988
01:07:56,073 --> 01:07:58,440
big James Brown finish.
989
01:07:58,442 --> 01:08:01,577
I come out,
throw a hijab around you,
990
01:08:01,579 --> 01:08:03,279
escort you off the stage.
991
01:08:03,281 --> 01:08:04,780
Richie...
You shrug off the shawl,
992
01:08:04,782 --> 01:08:07,616
stroll back to the mike,
go down, a full knee drop.
993
01:08:07,618 --> 01:08:10,552
Nail that last verse one last time.
Ignore him. You be you.
994
01:08:10,554 --> 01:08:14,390
You look like a lady.
You sing like an angel. It'll be enough.
995
01:08:25,069 --> 01:08:27,002
He's very good.
996
01:08:35,079 --> 01:08:36,612
Okay.
997
01:08:36,614 --> 01:08:38,694
Now's a good time
to be sick.
998
01:09:02,006 --> 01:09:04,340
Okay. Let 'em hear you.
999
01:09:14,485 --> 01:09:18,120
♪ Now that I've lost
everything to you ♪
1000
01:09:18,122 --> 01:09:21,523
♪ You say you want to
start something new ♪
1001
01:09:21,525 --> 01:09:25,294
♪ And it's breaking my heart
you're leaving ♪
1002
01:09:25,296 --> 01:09:27,129
♪ Baby, I'm grieving ♪
1003
01:09:27,131 --> 01:09:30,799
♪ But if you wanna leave,
take good care ♪
1004
01:09:30,801 --> 01:09:34,136
♪ Hope you have
a lot of nice things to wear ♪
1005
01:09:34,138 --> 01:09:38,874
♪ But then a lot of nice things
turn bad out there ♪
1006
01:09:42,012 --> 01:09:46,648
♪ Oh, baby, baby,
it's a wild world ♪
1007
01:09:48,352 --> 01:09:52,888
♪ It's hard to get by
just upon a smile ♪
1008
01:09:55,326 --> 01:09:59,061
♪ Oh, baby, baby,
it's a wild world ♪
1009
01:10:01,599 --> 01:10:05,734
♪ I'll always remember you
like a child, girl ♪
1010
01:10:08,105 --> 01:10:11,774
♪ You know, I've seen a lot
of what the world can do ♪
1011
01:10:11,776 --> 01:10:15,077
♪ And it's breakin'
my heart in two ♪
1012
01:10:15,079 --> 01:10:18,580
♪ Because I never wanna
see you sad, girl ♪
1013
01:10:18,582 --> 01:10:21,083
♪ Don't be a bad girl ♪
1014
01:10:21,085 --> 01:10:24,887
♪ But if you wanna leave,
take good care ♪
1015
01:10:24,889 --> 01:10:28,357
♪ Hope you make a lot
of nice friends out there ♪
1016
01:10:28,359 --> 01:10:33,162
♪ But just remember there's a
lot of bad and beware ♪
1017
01:10:36,534 --> 01:10:41,036
♪ Oh, baby, baby,
it's a wild world ♪
1018
01:10:43,607 --> 01:10:46,241
♪ It's hard to get by
just upon a smile ♪
1019
01:10:49,780 --> 01:10:53,782
♪ Ooh, baby, baby,
it's a wild world ♪
1020
01:10:56,554 --> 01:11:00,789
♪ I'll always remember you
like a child, girl ♪
1021
01:11:02,660 --> 01:11:07,129
♪ Oh, baby, baby,
it's a wild world ♪
1022
01:11:08,899 --> 01:11:14,570
♪ It's hard to get by
just upon a smile ♪♪
1023
01:11:17,842 --> 01:11:20,242
Yeah!
1024
01:11:20,244 --> 01:11:22,478
Come on!
Whoo!
1025
01:11:24,415 --> 01:11:26,715
Yeah! Come on!
1026
01:11:48,272 --> 01:11:50,152
How you feelin', boss?
1027
01:11:54,612 --> 01:11:56,678
They were with her.
1028
01:11:58,215 --> 01:12:00,949
I can feel when it's working.
1029
01:12:00,951 --> 01:12:02,684
And she had 'em.
1030
01:12:05,623 --> 01:12:07,956
They didn't wanna show it,
but she had 'em.
1031
01:12:09,293 --> 01:12:11,026
I mean, she was something.
1032
01:12:14,298 --> 01:12:16,198
She was really something.
1033
01:12:18,302 --> 01:12:22,037
♪ What else can a poor boy do? ♪
1034
01:12:27,978 --> 01:12:31,313
May I hide from the wind
over here?
1035
01:13:07,685 --> 01:13:09,751
We shook hands.
1036
01:13:09,753 --> 01:13:13,155
That's a binding contract,
sacred in my world!
1037
01:13:15,926 --> 01:13:18,961
Phone calls have been made,
to Dubai!
1038
01:13:22,199 --> 01:13:26,101
I've heard the greatest!
I've heard the best!
1039
01:13:26,103 --> 01:13:29,204
The way she sang last night,
she could have won it all!
1040
01:13:35,546 --> 01:13:38,614
We could have won it all, Dad.
1041
01:14:08,779 --> 01:14:10,946
If she goes back
to the village, Richie,
1042
01:14:10,948 --> 01:14:13,815
I must remove her name
from the ballot.
1043
01:14:23,460 --> 01:14:25,661
What a beautiful picture.
1044
01:14:26,697 --> 01:14:28,263
Miss, would you mind moving?
1045
01:14:28,265 --> 01:14:30,499
I'm trying to look at the skyline here.
Thank you.
1046
01:14:30,501 --> 01:14:32,467
Asshole.
1047
01:14:32,469 --> 01:14:34,336
What time is your flight?
1048
01:14:37,808 --> 01:14:41,309
8:00 to Dubai.
Three-hour layover.
1049
01:14:41,311 --> 01:14:45,714
And then I got a direct flight to LA.
Gotta sleep.
1050
01:14:47,951 --> 01:14:49,685
I was going to tell you.
Really.
1051
01:14:49,687 --> 01:14:52,120
When it comes to men,
I'm usually two steps ahead.
1052
01:14:52,122 --> 01:14:54,723
It wasn't supposed
to end this way.
1053
01:14:54,725 --> 01:14:56,825
That girl has talent.
1054
01:14:56,827 --> 01:15:00,629
She has the gift.
She has the magic. I know it.
1055
01:15:00,631 --> 01:15:03,699
How the hell good am I
if I can't break a talent like that?
1056
01:15:03,701 --> 01:15:05,667
Honey, I saw the audience.
1057
01:15:05,669 --> 01:15:09,404
They did not dig
an uncovered Pashtun girl...
1058
01:15:09,406 --> 01:15:11,239
singing Cat Stevens in English.
1059
01:15:13,143 --> 01:15:14,876
Sweetness and light.
1060
01:15:15,512 --> 01:15:17,312
I watched that crowd.
1061
01:15:17,314 --> 01:15:19,548
They wanted to go with her.
1062
01:15:19,550 --> 01:15:21,149
They were dying to go with her.
1063
01:15:21,151 --> 01:15:24,820
They just weren't able
to go with her because it was in public.
1064
01:15:24,822 --> 01:15:26,421
You really believe that?
1065
01:15:26,423 --> 01:15:28,323
I sure do.
1066
01:15:29,359 --> 01:15:31,093
So?
So...
1067
01:15:31,095 --> 01:15:34,229
daddy bear took her
out of the show, and she quit.
1068
01:15:34,231 --> 01:15:39,067
Quit? You quit. It was that easy
for you to walk away.
1069
01:15:39,069 --> 01:15:44,940
First little bump in the road,
and Mr. Richie's just giving up,
1070
01:15:44,942 --> 01:15:49,277
slinking back to his
little Van Nuys world.
1071
01:15:49,279 --> 01:15:52,347
I don't think you know
quite what you're talking about.
1072
01:15:52,349 --> 01:15:55,016
Nah. I don't know shit.
1073
01:15:55,018 --> 01:15:57,753
I know, 'cause my daddy
told me that.
1074
01:15:58,889 --> 01:16:01,089
"Merci, just shut up.
Put on a tube top.
1075
01:16:01,091 --> 01:16:04,192
Go find yourself a rich man
while you still can."
1076
01:16:05,295 --> 01:16:09,564
And for a long time, too long,
I believed him.
1077
01:16:09,566 --> 01:16:11,600
But you know what,
Richie?
1078
01:16:11,602 --> 01:16:14,202
I am not dumb.
1079
01:16:14,204 --> 01:16:17,739
I'm gonna walk out of here
with a serious nest egg...
1080
01:16:17,741 --> 01:16:21,476
and open my own
real estate agency in Oahu.
1081
01:16:23,580 --> 01:16:25,380
Richie Lanz,
I fought to be a winner,
1082
01:16:25,382 --> 01:16:30,786
and I do not have time
for quitters and losers.
1083
01:16:30,788 --> 01:16:33,789
I am not a loser.
1084
01:16:33,791 --> 01:16:36,391
I am a quitter.
1085
01:16:36,393 --> 01:16:38,827
If you really know talent,
1086
01:16:38,829 --> 01:16:44,232
and you really know that Salima's
gonna win her way into the next round,
1087
01:16:44,234 --> 01:16:45,967
then do something.
1088
01:16:45,969 --> 01:16:48,436
Figure something out, man.
I don't know.
1089
01:16:48,438 --> 01:16:50,138
But win, goddamn it.
1090
01:16:51,408 --> 01:16:55,677
God, you are really crazy about me,
aren't you?
1091
01:16:55,679 --> 01:17:00,182
I am your partner with this girl,
but I bet on you, Richie.
1092
01:17:00,184 --> 01:17:02,250
Not her. You.
1093
01:17:02,252 --> 01:17:05,153
And you better
deliver me my 30%.
1094
01:17:11,361 --> 01:17:13,295
I got an idea.
1095
01:17:13,297 --> 01:17:15,497
Of course you do, hon.
1096
01:17:17,935 --> 01:17:19,835
It's a million-to-one shot.
1097
01:17:22,206 --> 01:17:26,408
But so...
were the Bay City Rollers.
1098
01:17:51,668 --> 01:17:54,135
Hey. As-salaam alaikum.
1099
01:17:54,805 --> 01:17:56,304
Alaikum salaam.
1100
01:18:00,410 --> 01:18:04,112
What do you say we keep
Salima on the ballot?
1101
01:18:05,415 --> 01:18:06,915
What?
1102
01:18:06,917 --> 01:18:11,519
Well, who actually knows that she quit?
I mean, officially.
1103
01:18:11,521 --> 01:18:14,322
I know.
My staff knows.
1104
01:18:14,324 --> 01:18:17,058
Okay, but they don't know,
right?
1105
01:18:19,730 --> 01:18:21,663
On TV last night...
1106
01:18:21,665 --> 01:18:25,667
there was her name on the ballot
with a phone number to call. Yes.
1107
01:18:25,669 --> 01:18:30,205
You know, if you haven't officially
removed her from the ballot, don't.
1108
01:18:30,207 --> 01:18:33,208
She's risked her life.
Come on.
1109
01:18:33,210 --> 01:18:36,211
It'd be great for her village,
for her family, for her people,
1110
01:18:36,213 --> 01:18:39,581
the nation, the world,
women everywhere.
1111
01:18:39,583 --> 01:18:41,950
Maybe.
You know, probably.
1112
01:18:41,952 --> 01:18:44,686
But I found this girl in a cave.
1113
01:18:44,688 --> 01:18:48,290
And I heard her, and...
1114
01:18:49,626 --> 01:18:51,626
I just got to know, man.
1115
01:18:53,096 --> 01:18:55,530
I just got to know.
1116
01:18:55,532 --> 01:18:57,599
And don't you wanna know?
1117
01:19:02,873 --> 01:19:04,873
I already know.
1118
01:19:04,875 --> 01:19:08,543
This conversation
never happened, okay?
1119
01:19:13,717 --> 01:19:15,717
Salima!
1120
01:19:15,719 --> 01:19:17,452
Salima!
1121
01:19:17,454 --> 01:19:18,620
Salima!
1122
01:20:27,157 --> 01:20:30,358
You okay? Oh, I think
I'm bleeding somewhere.
1123
01:20:56,386 --> 01:20:59,254
I am going to brain this guy.
1124
01:20:59,256 --> 01:21:01,890
Salima Khan! Salima Khan!
1125
01:21:24,514 --> 01:21:25,847
Salima Khan!
1126
01:21:25,849 --> 01:21:28,083
Salima Khan!
1127
01:21:28,085 --> 01:21:30,285
Salima Khan!
1128
01:21:33,924 --> 01:21:35,623
Salima Khan!
1129
01:21:35,625 --> 01:21:38,259
Salima Khan! Salima Khan!
1130
01:21:38,261 --> 01:21:42,163
She did it! You did it!
We're in!
1131
01:21:44,734 --> 01:21:46,234
What?
1132
01:21:46,236 --> 01:21:49,737
Salima Khan! Salima Khan!
1133
01:21:49,739 --> 01:21:55,276
Salima Khan!
1134
01:22:05,922 --> 01:22:10,391
Technically, the daddy
did threaten to cut off my head.
1135
01:22:10,393 --> 01:22:14,329
That was before his lambkin
made it to the final round.
1136
01:22:14,331 --> 01:22:16,798
Hey, he will put your head
on a spike.
1137
01:22:16,800 --> 01:22:19,334
Come on. Babe, please.
1138
01:22:20,237 --> 01:22:22,403
Face-to-face? I own him.
1139
01:22:25,342 --> 01:22:28,576
Everything all right?
I have to go to work.
1140
01:22:28,578 --> 01:22:29,844
Work?
1141
01:22:33,183 --> 01:22:35,250
But you said that you retired.
1142
01:22:35,252 --> 01:22:37,752
You-You said
you discovered Madonna.
1143
01:22:39,256 --> 01:22:42,323
I don't have a choice.
None.
1144
01:22:42,325 --> 01:22:44,893
So you're just gonna have to
trust me on this, Richie.
1145
01:22:45,662 --> 01:22:47,929
Or not.
1146
01:22:47,931 --> 01:22:52,333
What kind of warlord
throws a pool party on a weekday?
1147
01:22:52,335 --> 01:22:55,803
So... you wanna
say something?
1148
01:22:55,805 --> 01:22:58,673
- Yeah.
- Okay. Say it.
1149
01:22:58,675 --> 01:23:03,845
What is a beauty like you
doing with a goof like me?
1150
01:23:06,449 --> 01:23:08,616
You never heard
of "a Merci fuck"?
1151
01:23:15,292 --> 01:23:17,358
May I ask you one favor?
1152
01:23:19,529 --> 01:23:20,795
Okay.
1153
01:23:20,797 --> 01:23:24,866
Don't do the Marilyn
wig thing with the scarves.
1154
01:23:24,868 --> 01:23:27,302
Just save that for us.
I feel like that was our special deal.
1155
01:23:27,304 --> 01:23:29,070
I will see you tomorrow.
1156
01:23:29,072 --> 01:23:32,707
I have a lot of emotion
tied into it.
1157
01:23:43,987 --> 01:23:47,722
We are returning to the
picturesque Pashtun village.
1158
01:23:47,724 --> 01:23:50,091
Although without backup.
1159
01:23:50,093 --> 01:23:53,328
But this time
for twice my initial fee.
1160
01:23:55,031 --> 01:23:57,265
You need a hook,
Mr. Bombay.
1161
01:23:57,267 --> 01:24:00,301
There's a million
mercenary memoirs out there.
1162
01:24:01,204 --> 01:24:03,605
I'm sorry.
This is what I do.
1163
01:24:03,607 --> 01:24:06,674
Yeah. What you do
is talk shit.
1164
01:24:10,080 --> 01:24:13,848
I could get you
in a bidding situation.
1165
01:24:13,850 --> 01:24:16,210
Miss Merci.
1166
01:24:17,220 --> 01:24:18,953
House of pain.
1167
01:24:18,955 --> 01:24:21,856
Me and this Pashtun girl,
we're in the hot tub with two guys.
1168
01:24:21,858 --> 01:24:23,758
Oh, Lord.
1169
01:24:23,760 --> 01:24:27,395
With Azam Ghol
and this... this Nizar.
1170
01:24:27,397 --> 01:24:30,031
All right. Just give me
the gory details.
1171
01:24:30,033 --> 01:24:31,766
Richie, shut up.
Listen to me.
1172
01:24:31,768 --> 01:24:36,204
Those bullets that
you sold to Salima's father...
1173
01:24:36,206 --> 01:24:38,306
I don't know
if they're, like, bad.
1174
01:24:38,308 --> 01:24:39,941
They won't fire.
They're old.
1175
01:24:39,943 --> 01:24:43,444
Richie, it was all a setup.
Do you hear me?
1176
01:24:43,446 --> 01:24:45,747
You delivered
the bad bullets for them.
1177
01:24:45,749 --> 01:24:48,483
They used you, Richie.
You were the fucking patsy.
1178
01:24:48,485 --> 01:24:51,052
And Nizar's gonna kill Salima.
He's a crazy man.
1179
01:24:51,054 --> 01:24:52,553
He kept screaming about it.
1180
01:24:52,555 --> 01:24:54,422
She's, like, a whore,
an infidel, whatever.
1181
01:24:54,424 --> 01:24:57,225
And you put her on TV,
Richie.
1182
01:24:57,227 --> 01:24:59,560
They're gonna fucking kill her.
They're gonna kill her father,
1183
01:24:59,562 --> 01:25:02,897
take over the village,
and you've got to do something.
1184
01:25:02,899 --> 01:25:03,965
Do you get it?
1185
01:25:05,902 --> 01:25:07,568
Thanks for the tip, honey.
1186
01:25:07,570 --> 01:25:10,004
See you soon. Gotta go.
1187
01:25:10,006 --> 01:25:13,007
Richie? Richie?
1188
01:25:15,812 --> 01:25:17,578
Slight change of plans.
1189
01:25:17,580 --> 01:25:19,580
Let's go back to Kabul.
1190
01:25:20,183 --> 01:25:21,916
What?
1191
01:25:21,918 --> 01:25:23,718
We're not gonna go get her?
1192
01:25:27,791 --> 01:25:29,023
What?
1193
01:25:29,025 --> 01:25:33,494
Your handshake is your word.
You shook her hand.
1194
01:25:35,265 --> 01:25:38,666
You tell Salima
that your word is bond.
1195
01:25:40,036 --> 01:25:41,669
Richie,
1196
01:25:42,472 --> 01:25:44,505
you are her manager.
1197
01:25:50,780 --> 01:25:52,380
Shit.
1198
01:25:53,450 --> 01:25:56,517
Stop.
What?
1199
01:25:56,519 --> 01:25:58,653
Just stop the car.
1200
01:25:58,655 --> 01:26:00,922
Stop. Stop!
1201
01:26:25,482 --> 01:26:28,416
Hey! The fuck?
1202
01:26:30,053 --> 01:26:31,619
What's happening?
1203
01:26:51,875 --> 01:26:53,508
What the hell?
1204
01:27:01,184 --> 01:27:04,018
I never discovered Madonna.
1205
01:27:04,020 --> 01:27:05,820
What?
1206
01:27:07,524 --> 01:27:11,459
I never handled
a real headliner.
1207
01:27:11,461 --> 01:27:15,797
I did have Eddie Money, but it was back
when he was Eddie Mahoney.
1208
01:27:15,799 --> 01:27:18,766
It was long before
"Two Tickets To Paradise."
1209
01:27:21,471 --> 01:27:23,538
I made a few bucks.
1210
01:27:26,376 --> 01:27:29,610
I nailed a couple
of hot publicists.
1211
01:27:30,713 --> 01:27:34,482
But I also gave up
a daughter I love.
1212
01:27:38,288 --> 01:27:39,754
But, gentlemen,
Riza is right.
1213
01:27:39,756 --> 01:27:44,792
There are four
sacred bonds in this life:
1214
01:27:46,095 --> 01:27:47,962
a parent and child,
1215
01:27:48,932 --> 01:27:50,798
a husband and wife,
1216
01:27:51,634 --> 01:27:53,868
a priest and confessor...
1217
01:27:56,506 --> 01:27:58,473
and manager-talent.
1218
01:27:59,609 --> 01:28:01,275
What about doctor-patient?
1219
01:28:01,277 --> 01:28:03,237
Or lawyer-client.
1220
01:28:04,514 --> 01:28:06,080
Not sacred.
1221
01:28:08,451 --> 01:28:11,519
Now, Salima...
1222
01:28:14,257 --> 01:28:16,090
is my act.
1223
01:28:16,092 --> 01:28:17,758
She's mine.
1224
01:28:19,028 --> 01:28:21,562
I am her manager.
1225
01:28:22,665 --> 01:28:24,832
And my act needs me.
1226
01:28:26,870 --> 01:28:28,503
Now.
1227
01:28:58,501 --> 01:29:00,535
"You stole my daughter."
1228
01:29:01,638 --> 01:29:04,672
Yes. But you raised her.
1229
01:29:04,674 --> 01:29:06,240
And you raised her...
1230
01:29:06,242 --> 01:29:09,977
to honor and celebrate...
1231
01:29:09,979 --> 01:29:14,715
your family,
your country and your God.
1232
01:29:16,386 --> 01:29:20,254
And if you didn't truly believe that,
wouldn't she be dead by now?
1233
01:29:24,661 --> 01:29:27,128
Hang on. It gets worse.
1234
01:29:55,291 --> 01:29:56,924
Understandable.
1235
01:29:58,194 --> 01:29:59,961
We are your only chance.
1236
01:30:01,364 --> 01:30:03,798
"We?"
Yeah.
1237
01:30:03,800 --> 01:30:07,168
There is no "we."
I'm done with you.
1238
01:30:08,705 --> 01:30:10,638
That's enough.
1239
01:30:14,577 --> 01:30:17,945
When were you going to tell me?
Was it a big surprise or something?
1240
01:30:17,947 --> 01:30:20,314
Something you were gonna
spring on me?
1241
01:30:20,316 --> 01:30:22,016
It just hit me.
1242
01:30:23,386 --> 01:30:26,087
This is your killer hook.
1243
01:30:26,089 --> 01:30:31,726
This is your final chapter
of your best-selling book, right here.
1244
01:30:31,728 --> 01:30:35,796
Oh, my book. My book.
You mean my posthumous book.
1245
01:30:35,798 --> 01:30:38,065
The one that you're gonna make
all the money off of...
1246
01:30:38,067 --> 01:30:40,935
after these guys shoot me
about a thousand times?
1247
01:30:40,937 --> 01:30:43,337
- There is no deal, Hollywood.
- All right. All right.
1248
01:30:43,339 --> 01:30:44,939
I never do this.
1249
01:30:44,941 --> 01:30:48,175
If you ever tell anyone I did this,
I'll deny it.
1250
01:30:48,177 --> 01:30:50,144
But I'm gonna cut my fee.
1251
01:30:50,146 --> 01:30:53,180
There'll be no Richie 35
on this one.
1252
01:30:53,182 --> 01:30:57,351
There'll be Richie 15,
and we're still both gonna do great.
1253
01:30:57,353 --> 01:31:01,656
Because this is golden.
1254
01:31:03,693 --> 01:31:07,361
Brian, you don't
wanna be the guy...
1255
01:31:08,631 --> 01:31:11,365
that left the Alamo.
1256
01:31:17,774 --> 01:31:19,940
You are a piece of work.
1257
01:31:21,110 --> 01:31:22,677
Thank you.
1258
01:31:22,679 --> 01:31:26,380
My posthumous book...
I wonder what you'll call it.
1259
01:31:26,382 --> 01:31:28,683
Chief, this is for you.
1260
01:31:30,386 --> 01:31:34,455
In that truck is all the ammunition
you will ever need.
1261
01:31:34,457 --> 01:31:38,225
And my bullets work.
1262
01:31:38,227 --> 01:31:42,830
Now come on back here with me.
1263
01:31:44,834 --> 01:31:48,302
That's for you. Brand new.
There you go.
1264
01:31:48,304 --> 01:31:50,037
Careful with that.
1265
01:32:41,057 --> 01:32:44,525
Thanks for not killing me.
1266
01:32:46,229 --> 01:32:49,830
What did he say?
The day is not over yet.
1267
01:32:51,768 --> 01:32:53,334
Pretty good.
1268
01:33:12,388 --> 01:33:13,988
Richie.
1269
01:33:15,224 --> 01:33:16,824
Hi.
1270
01:33:21,998 --> 01:33:26,100
In all the excitement,
I forgot to congratulate you.
1271
01:33:26,102 --> 01:33:28,469
You won.
1272
01:33:28,471 --> 01:33:31,071
I told you.
1273
01:33:31,073 --> 01:33:33,274
Yeah.
1274
01:33:33,276 --> 01:33:35,409
And that was nothing.
1275
01:33:35,411 --> 01:33:39,013
I had a killer arrangement
for the finals.
1276
01:33:39,015 --> 01:33:41,949
Strings. Gospel choir.
1277
01:33:41,951 --> 01:33:44,919
Wall of sound. Huge.
1278
01:33:44,921 --> 01:33:47,154
You would have won in a walk.
1279
01:33:52,962 --> 01:33:58,265
Salima, honey,
you were the best I ever heard.
1280
01:34:01,470 --> 01:34:03,170
You saw it all.
1281
01:34:04,207 --> 01:34:08,209
Well...
Except for this part.
1282
01:34:08,211 --> 01:34:13,380
Richie, this, right now...
This will be the best part.
1283
01:34:13,950 --> 01:34:15,549
The dying part?
1284
01:34:15,551 --> 01:34:20,321
Not the dying part.
The living.
1285
01:34:20,323 --> 01:34:22,957
You... You folks
from the mystic East...
1286
01:34:22,959 --> 01:34:27,394
have a much better handle
on the whole karma, life/death thing.
1287
01:34:28,297 --> 01:34:31,298
Rumi writes,
1288
01:34:31,300 --> 01:34:35,369
"There's a candle in your heart,
ready to be kindled.
1289
01:34:35,371 --> 01:34:40,374
There's a void in your soul,
ready to be filled.
1290
01:34:41,010 --> 01:34:43,143
You feel it, don't you?"
1291
01:34:43,145 --> 01:34:46,647
Richie.
You will.
1292
01:34:46,649 --> 01:34:48,315
I...
1293
01:34:48,317 --> 01:34:51,452
I promise
you will feel it.
1294
01:35:13,709 --> 01:35:16,410
♪ Mama, take this badge off of me ♪
1295
01:35:20,683 --> 01:35:24,251
♪ I can't use it anymore ♪
1296
01:35:27,356 --> 01:35:31,191
♪ It's getting dark,
too dark to see ♪
1297
01:35:34,230 --> 01:35:38,299
♪ I feel I'm knocking
on heaven's door ♪
1298
01:35:41,270 --> 01:35:45,272
♪ Knock, knock, knocking
on heaven's door ♪
1299
01:35:48,144 --> 01:35:52,279
♪ Knock, knock, knocking
on heaven's door ♪
1300
01:35:55,217 --> 01:35:59,286
♪ Knock, knock, knocking
on heaven's door ♪
1301
01:36:02,124 --> 01:36:05,993
♪ Knock, knock, knocking
on heaven's door ♪♪
1302
01:36:10,333 --> 01:36:11,699
This is nuts!
1303
01:36:14,136 --> 01:36:17,571
I'm not a fighter.
I'm a deal maker.
1304
01:36:17,573 --> 01:36:20,074
I'm gonna go make a deal.
1305
01:36:20,076 --> 01:36:22,142
You just gotta love this guy.
1306
01:36:27,083 --> 01:36:30,317
These guys have no idea
what they're up against.
1307
01:36:31,487 --> 01:36:33,420
Let me do the talking.
1308
01:36:34,457 --> 01:36:36,156
Knock yourself out.
1309
01:36:47,636 --> 01:36:50,604
"What are you doing?"
1310
01:36:50,606 --> 01:36:53,807
I'm representing.
I'm here to negotiate.
1311
01:36:53,809 --> 01:36:56,677
And you?
1312
01:36:58,014 --> 01:37:01,682
"We are here to kill all unbelievers
and the whore who sings."
1313
01:37:04,620 --> 01:37:07,221
Okay. I'm hearing you.
1314
01:37:07,223 --> 01:37:10,691
More of a deal breaker
than a negotiation.
1315
01:37:10,693 --> 01:37:15,029
Let's get serious. What's it gonna
take for all of this to go away?
1316
01:37:18,300 --> 01:37:20,901
"Kill him. Kill this fool now."
1317
01:37:20,903 --> 01:37:27,007
Okay. Very quickly.
A key is to know what the other guy wants.
1318
01:37:27,009 --> 01:37:31,645
You are a warlord.
You want war, I suppose.
1319
01:37:31,647 --> 01:37:34,214
Money. Power.
Maybe opium.
1320
01:37:34,216 --> 01:37:36,817
And in an ideal world...
1321
01:37:36,819 --> 01:37:42,589
you'd like CIA and Taliban to both
pay you to sell out your own country.
1322
01:37:42,591 --> 01:37:44,158
You're a warlord.
1323
01:37:59,108 --> 01:38:02,209
Stand down! Stand down!
1324
01:38:06,682 --> 01:38:09,683
Anybody else wanna see
how real bullets work?
1325
01:38:09,685 --> 01:38:11,185
Richie, you're all right.
1326
01:38:11,187 --> 01:38:13,787
It's a flesh wound.
Walk it off. Let's go.
1327
01:38:21,230 --> 01:38:24,131
♪ Now I've been happy lately ♪
1328
01:38:24,133 --> 01:38:27,267
♪ Thinking about
the good things to come ♪
1329
01:38:27,269 --> 01:38:30,537
♪ And I believe it could be ♪
1330
01:38:30,539 --> 01:38:32,906
♪ Something good has begun ♪
1331
01:38:32,908 --> 01:38:36,710
♪ Oh, I've been smiling lately ♪
1332
01:38:36,712 --> 01:38:39,213
♪ Dreaming about the world
as one ♪
1333
01:38:39,215 --> 01:38:42,549
♪ And I believe it could be ♪
1334
01:38:42,551 --> 01:38:45,252
♪ Someday it's going to come ♪
1335
01:38:45,254 --> 01:38:48,555
♪ Cause out on
the edge of darkness ♪
1336
01:38:48,557 --> 01:38:50,657
♪ There rides a peace train ♪
1337
01:38:50,659 --> 01:38:54,962
♪ Oh, peace train,
take this country ♪
1338
01:38:54,964 --> 01:38:57,231
♪ Come take me home again ♪
1339
01:38:57,233 --> 01:39:00,400
♪ Now I've been smiling lately ♪
1340
01:39:00,402 --> 01:39:03,303
♪ Thinking about
the good things to come ♪
1341
01:39:03,305 --> 01:39:06,907
♪ And I believe it could be ♪
1342
01:39:06,909 --> 01:39:09,409
♪ Something good has begun ♪
1343
01:39:09,411 --> 01:39:12,412
♪ Oh, peace train
sounding louder ♪
1344
01:39:12,414 --> 01:39:15,315
♪ Glide on the peace train ♪
1345
01:39:15,317 --> 01:39:18,585
♪ Oh-ah-ay-ah-oh-ah ♪
1346
01:39:18,587 --> 01:39:21,088
♪ Come on now, peace train ♪
1347
01:39:21,090 --> 01:39:24,458
♪ Yes, peace train,
holy roller ♪
1348
01:39:24,460 --> 01:39:27,861
♪ Everyone jump up
on the peace train ♪
1349
01:39:27,863 --> 01:39:30,464
♪ Oh-ah-ay-ah-oh-ah ♪
1350
01:39:30,466 --> 01:39:33,433
♪ Come on now, peace train ♪
1351
01:39:33,435 --> 01:39:36,603
♪ Come and join the living ♪
1352
01:39:36,605 --> 01:39:39,339
♪ It's not so far from you ♪
1353
01:39:39,341 --> 01:39:42,843
♪ And it's getting nearer ♪
1354
01:39:42,845 --> 01:39:45,546
♪ Soon it will all be true ♪
1355
01:39:45,548 --> 01:39:48,448
♪ Peace train sounding louder ♪
1356
01:39:48,450 --> 01:39:51,518
♪ Glide on the peace train ♪
1357
01:39:51,520 --> 01:39:54,521
♪ Oh-ah-ay-ah-oh-ah ♪
1358
01:39:54,523 --> 01:39:56,757
♪ Come on now, peace train ♪
1359
01:39:57,526 --> 01:40:00,561
♪ I've been crying lately ♪
1360
01:40:00,563 --> 01:40:03,497
♪ Thinking about the world
as it is ♪
1361
01:40:03,499 --> 01:40:06,967
♪ Why must we go on hating? ♪
1362
01:40:06,969 --> 01:40:08,902
♪ Why can't we live in bliss? ♪
1363
01:40:08,904 --> 01:40:12,906
♪ 'Cause out on
the edge of darkness ♪
1364
01:40:12,908 --> 01:40:15,342
♪ There rides a peace train ♪
1365
01:40:15,344 --> 01:40:19,146
♪ Oh, peace train,
take this country ♪
1366
01:40:19,148 --> 01:40:21,481
♪ Come take me home again ♪
1367
01:40:21,483 --> 01:40:24,518
♪ Peace train, holy roller ♪
1368
01:40:24,520 --> 01:40:27,487
♪ Everyone jump up
on the peace train ♪
1369
01:40:27,489 --> 01:40:30,657
♪ Oh-ah-ay-ah-oh-ah ♪
1370
01:40:30,659 --> 01:40:32,659
♪ Come on now, peace train ♪
1371
01:40:33,495 --> 01:40:36,563
♪ Oh-ah-ay-ah-oh-ah ♪
1372
01:40:36,565 --> 01:40:43,904
♪ Come on, come on,
peace train ♪♪
1373
01:40:45,174 --> 01:40:47,841
♪ Peace train, holy roller ♪
1374
01:40:47,843 --> 01:40:50,911
♪ Everyone jump up
on the peace train ♪
1375
01:40:50,913 --> 01:40:53,714
♪ Hoo-ah-eeh-ah-hoo-ah ♪
1376
01:40:53,716 --> 01:40:56,683
♪ Come on, come on, come on ♪
1377
01:40:56,685 --> 01:41:00,787
♪ Let's come on,
peace train, oh ♪
1378
01:41:07,529 --> 01:41:10,697
♪ Hoo-ah-eeh-ah-hoo-ah ♪
1379
01:41:10,699 --> 01:41:13,767
♪ Come on, peace train
The peace train ♪
1380
01:41:19,275 --> 01:41:22,609
♪ Come on, peace train ♪♪
1381
01:41:48,604 --> 01:41:51,738
No. No, I don't, uh...
Thank you.
1382
01:41:51,740 --> 01:41:55,275
I don't want string.
I don't use string. Okay?
1383
01:41:55,277 --> 01:41:57,944
Do I look like...
Do I look like I use string?
1384
01:41:57,946 --> 01:42:01,248
No, I want this thing here.
I want the animal. Okay?
1385
01:42:01,250 --> 01:42:03,150
Come on. For my kid.
For my girl.
1386
01:42:03,152 --> 01:42:04,985
Let's take a look.
1387
01:42:04,987 --> 01:42:06,586
Come on.
1388
01:42:07,756 --> 01:42:10,624
All right, what you got
to have for this, five bucks?
1389
01:42:10,626 --> 01:42:12,626
It's made in Taiwan.
You didn't make this.
1390
01:42:12,628 --> 01:42:15,629
You didn't make this.
This was made by Chinese people in Taiwan.
1391
01:42:15,631 --> 01:42:17,364
Five bucks good? We good?
1392
01:42:19,835 --> 01:42:21,601
If you're saying 10 bucks,
I'm sorry.
1393
01:42:21,603 --> 01:42:23,470
'Cause I only got five bucks.
It's all I got.
1394
01:42:23,472 --> 01:42:25,172
You can't do it for five?
1395
01:42:25,174 --> 01:42:26,773
Here, man, take it.
1396
01:42:26,775 --> 01:42:28,442
I'll find somewhere else
for five, I promise you.
1397
01:42:28,444 --> 01:42:31,211
It's what I got. It's all I got.
1398
01:42:31,213 --> 01:42:34,514
Thank you so much.
Thanks. Appreciate it.
1399
01:42:34,516 --> 01:42:37,818
That's great. That'll be...
All right, give me some string.
1400
01:42:37,820 --> 01:42:40,854
Give me some... Here, I found
five more bucks. Give me...
1401
01:42:46,562 --> 01:42:49,796
Well, that's ugly. Give me...
Give me that blue one.
1402
01:42:51,900 --> 01:42:54,134
Which one...
I don't need all of this.
1403
01:42:54,136 --> 01:42:55,736
Which one's better?
This one?
1404
01:42:55,738 --> 01:42:57,738
Give me...
That one's clean.
1405
01:43:00,142 --> 01:43:03,844
Now it's mixed in there. That's the color.
Which one's better, this or this?
1406
01:43:03,846 --> 01:43:05,312
Which one?
1407
01:43:05,314 --> 01:43:07,814
I'm taking that one.
Between these two.
1408
01:43:07,816 --> 01:43:10,484
Ah. Ah.
1409
01:43:10,486 --> 01:43:11,985
I just wanna take
one of these.
1410
01:43:11,987 --> 01:43:14,321
I want two of these.
This one or this one?
1411
01:43:14,323 --> 01:43:16,156
This one?
1412
01:43:16,158 --> 01:43:17,991
I got that one. Here.
1413
01:43:17,993 --> 01:43:21,073
This one or this one?
1414
01:43:24,333 --> 01:43:25,932
I'm gonna decide
on my own.
1415
01:43:25,934 --> 01:43:28,368
I've already put this one in my mouth.
I'm keeping that one.
1416
01:43:28,370 --> 01:43:31,705
And that reminds me of someone,
and this is brand new and mysterious.
1417
01:43:31,707 --> 01:43:33,540
So you keep that one.
We'll call it square.
1418
01:43:33,542 --> 01:43:35,942
Oh.
1419
01:43:37,079 --> 01:43:38,745
Okay.
105246
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