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1
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,704
- [people chattering]
- ["Pistol Packin' Mama" playing]
2
00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:24,960
[Maxine] In Palm Beach, everyone has
money, but not everyone is truly rich.
3
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:28,672
Nigel, go upstairs and find out
what's taking everyone so long.
4
00:01:28,672 --> 00:01:29,756
Oh, yes, ma'am.
5
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:35,512
- Ah, hello.
- Hmm.
6
00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,851
[Maxine] I was learning quickly that,
in Palm Beach,
7
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:43,729
an untold secret is like a loaded gun.
8
00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:48,442
You never know when it will go off.
9
00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:49,693
- [gunshot]
- [gasps]
10
00:01:49,693 --> 00:01:51,778
- [people gasp]
- [people screaming]
11
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,114
[Maxine] Or who it might hit.
12
00:01:56,158 --> 00:02:00,662
And, full disclosure, I suppose
I had one or two little secrets of my own.
13
00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:06,960
For the sake of my marriage and my sanity,
I had to tell the truth.
14
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:10,047
- It's a beautiful day, isn't it?
- Oh, that it is.
15
00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:12,174
[sighs] Thank you.
16
00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:15,761
- Um, Douglas... [exhales sharply]
- Mmm?
17
00:02:16,261 --> 00:02:19,598
...uh, there's something...
Well, a few things I need to tell you.
18
00:02:19,598 --> 00:02:21,183
Well, you can tell me anything.
19
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:23,810
[exhales sharply]
20
00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:26,355
[breathes shakily]
21
00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:30,609
I may have passed some bad checks.
22
00:02:30,609 --> 00:02:33,779
The Fibs still haven't received
your $75,000 check.
23
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,074
Plus a $10,000 check.
24
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:39,660
If you plan on coming
to my Havana Nights Gala next week.
25
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,037
And maybe pawned some of Norma's jewelry,
26
00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:45,332
which in some circles might be
misconstrued as stealing.
27
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:47,209
[cash register dings]
28
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:49,962
And I might have run up
a little mountain of debt.
29
00:02:49,962 --> 00:02:52,256
- And how will you be paying?
- You take a check?
30
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:56,093
Not including the 75 grand
I was bullied into paying
31
00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:58,846
for a stone cat that we already own.
32
00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:00,931
$75,000!
33
00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:02,432
- [shatters]
- Oh. [gasps]
34
00:03:06,937 --> 00:03:08,397
Ah, that's not so bad.
35
00:03:08,397 --> 00:03:10,732
Douglas, did you hear
what I said about the jewelry?
36
00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:14,194
Diamonds are temporary.
Our love is forever.
37
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,241
Unlike our inheritance, which is never!
38
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:20,701
Hmm?
39
00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:24,162
- Cocktails!
- [Douglas] Hey, babe.
40
00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,499
[Maxine] The great unburdening
would have to wait. [sighs]
41
00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,377
Why let the truth spoil a sunny day?
42
00:03:31,003 --> 00:03:34,214
I couldn't bear to tell him
that his inheritance had been rerouted
43
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,008
to a cat sanctuary.
44
00:03:38,093 --> 00:03:40,554
- [Maxine] It'd break his heart.
- [sighs]
45
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:44,266
- [drawer opens]
- [rummaging]
46
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:47,102
[sighs] Where's the key?
47
00:03:47,603 --> 00:03:50,772
Damn it! [grunts, groans]
48
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:54,568
Norma,
everything is going to hell without you!
49
00:03:55,819 --> 00:04:01,408
I'm trying to save you, me.
Hell, the whole world.
50
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,912
[machine beeping]
51
00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:09,499
Norma? Are you in there?
52
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:13,754
Can you hear me?
53
00:04:14,630 --> 00:04:17,716
Blink once for yes. Two for no.
54
00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:23,764
[exclaims, laughs]
I knew it! You still got it!
55
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:26,517
Oh, God. I've missed you, my dear friend.
56
00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:31,355
[sighs] And I'm sure you've missed me.
57
00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:36,902
W-Well, that hurt, 'cause...
[stammers, sighs]
58
00:04:37,819 --> 00:04:40,864
All right, Norma, listen.
I want you to listen very carefully.
59
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:44,618
Is the Rolodex in this room?
60
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:51,083
One, two. Okay, I knew it.
I knew it. It's in the safety deposit box.
61
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:53,877
All right, so is the key in this room?
62
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:56,421
[gasps]
63
00:04:56,421 --> 00:05:01,218
Two. Thr... Wait a minute. Uh, that's
three blinks. Unless that's a maybe.
64
00:05:01,885 --> 00:05:05,389
Is three blinks a maybe? Is three...
[stammers]
65
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,600
Norma, stop fucking with me!
This is serious!
66
00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:10,936
Are you sitting on it?
67
00:05:12,271 --> 00:05:15,107
Sorry, Norma. [breathing shakily]
68
00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:19,736
[metal clanking]
69
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,781
You got a bony ass, Norma.
70
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:25,951
I know it's in here somewhere, Norma.
[breathes shakily]
71
00:05:25,951 --> 00:05:27,286
[grunting]
72
00:05:27,286 --> 00:05:30,038
[strains] I'm gonna shake it out of you!
[grunts]
73
00:05:31,915 --> 00:05:34,251
["Everything Happens To Me" playing]
74
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:41,175
[breathing deeply]
Yes, Your Honor. No, Your Honor.
75
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:43,927
[sighs]
76
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:56,857
[sighs]
77
00:06:05,115 --> 00:06:06,533
- Hey!
- Hey, pool boy,
78
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,869
I'll take a little bit more mai in my tai.
79
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,412
Have you been in the pool house?
80
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:13,207
Why would I go into the pool house
when I have the real house?
81
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:17,544
A little hoity-toity for a pool boy.
82
00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:20,923
I'll say. [smacks lips]
I'll put some more mai in your tai.
83
00:06:20,923 --> 00:06:22,007
Aw, thanks, babe.
84
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:25,135
- I love you.
- And I love you.
85
00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:29,431
[inhales deeply] You know what?
Today is the day. [sighs]
86
00:06:29,932 --> 00:06:32,518
My final flight in the 737.
87
00:06:32,518 --> 00:06:35,062
Miami, Toledo. Toledo, Des Moines.
88
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:37,147
And then I'm hanging up my wings for good.
89
00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:38,941
Douglas!
90
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:44,112
- Does that make you happy?
- [breathes shakily] S-So happy.
91
00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:47,616
Why would I keep working
when I've got all this and you?
92
00:06:50,118 --> 00:06:53,080
[breathes deeply]
93
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:00,087
[gasps]
94
00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:06,218
[bell rings]
95
00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,221
- Linda?
- [Linda stammers]
96
00:07:09,221 --> 00:07:11,014
Hi, ladies. Have you seen Linda?
97
00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:13,475
Linda.
98
00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:19,064
Tall. Red hair. Wears too much denim.
[chuckles] Turquoise jewelry.
99
00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:22,526
Oh.
100
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:24,444
Thanks.
101
00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:27,948
Linda, uh, I need you.
102
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,158
- Uh, do you need a book?
- Very funny.
103
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:32,035
I need my new best friend.
104
00:07:32,035 --> 00:07:35,831
Oh. Uh, well,
maybe a little early for best friend.
105
00:07:35,831 --> 00:07:40,419
You know, if you need a healer
or a therapist, massage therapist,
106
00:07:40,419 --> 00:07:42,754
there are names on the corkboard.
You can get a session.
107
00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:46,049
Gee, thanks.
Hope they can do a session in prison.
108
00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:50,929
- What?
- I am a thief and a liar and a squatter.
109
00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:53,974
[breathes deeply] And I learned
last night, courtesy of your stepmother,
110
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:56,518
there is no way to right the ship.
111
00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:58,937
- I'm not following.
- We are disinherited!
112
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:00,939
But don't tell a soul.
113
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,234
Y-You just told everybody
in the bookstore.
114
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:08,447
I don't think I will ever see
any of these people ever again.
115
00:08:08,447 --> 00:08:10,115
What'd your husband say?
116
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:12,784
He doesn't like when things get messy.
117
00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:15,120
- Maxine, you have to tell him.
- No, I ca...
118
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,747
Yes, the sooner the better.
119
00:08:16,747 --> 00:08:20,501
He's never been more in love with me
than he is now. I can't.
120
00:08:20,501 --> 00:08:22,669
Oh, Maxine. [sighs]
121
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,839
All right. Come here. It's gonna be okay.
122
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:29,760
- Okay. Mmm. [inhales deeply]
- All right? So breathe and listen to me.
123
00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:32,261
Palm Beach is just a shell game,
124
00:08:32,261 --> 00:08:34,306
and you're playing like one
of the natives.
125
00:08:34,306 --> 00:08:35,933
I really wanna be a native.
126
00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:40,062
Down here, you're only a criminal if you
get caught, and probably not even then.
127
00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:41,145
So you're good.
128
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:45,234
See, look at us. We are best friends.
129
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,377
A man in a fedora.
130
00:09:10,342 --> 00:09:12,261
I can see you in there, ma'am.
131
00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:18,517
Oh. [chuckles] Good morrow.
132
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:22,563
I'm looking for
a Mr. and Mrs. Douglas Dellacorte Simmons.
133
00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:24,481
Oh, we dropped the Simmons.
134
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,192
Sergeant Tom Sanka, Palm Beach Police.
135
00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:31,363
Is this about the jewelry?
The checks? Stoned Mabel?
136
00:09:31,363 --> 00:09:33,490
Look, I will tell you everything.
I can't live like this.
137
00:09:35,534 --> 00:09:39,079
You need to appear
in probate court tomorrow at 4:00
138
00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:41,748
in the matter
of Norma Dellacorte's guardianship.
139
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:43,959
- Oh.
- Consider yourself served.
140
00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:49,715
Served?
141
00:09:49,715 --> 00:09:52,843
Your Honor,
my husband and I are just mystified
142
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:55,345
as to why this matter
has been adjudicated,
143
00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:59,766
a-as we are Mrs. Norma Dellacorte's
only living family.
144
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:05,772
Fellas have a way of crawling out
of the woodwork in situations like these.
145
00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:10,903
Uh, Mr., um, Diaz has, uh,
146
00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:14,198
petitioned the court for conservatorship.
147
00:10:14,198 --> 00:10:18,243
Uh, I'm sorry. Mr. who?
I've never heard that name in my entire...
148
00:10:22,164 --> 00:10:23,415
- ...life.
- I'm sorry, I'm late, Your Honor.
149
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:26,376
You're not off to a very good start,
Mr. Diaz.
150
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:30,797
The role of conservator requires sober
and timely administration
151
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:36,720
of all the Dellacorte trusts and assets,
including health proxies.
152
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:42,518
Trusts and assets? Please clarify.
[stammers] I'm just a wife.
153
00:10:42,518 --> 00:10:48,273
This fella has filed to be conservator
of the Dellacorte trust.
154
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:51,944
In other words,
he who's the nurse, gets the purse.
155
00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:54,279
Proceed.
156
00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:57,950
Miss Simmons has moved
into Miss Dellacorte's home,
157
00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:01,245
- stolen precious family heirlooms...
- I object!
158
00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:03,205
Uh, you don't object. You...
159
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:05,123
Your Honor, that matter has been sorted.
160
00:11:05,123 --> 00:11:08,168
Your Honor,
we've all heard stories about gold diggers
161
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:11,129
who come to Palm Beach
and bleed the elderly dry.
162
00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:12,339
It would break my heart
163
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:15,259
- if Norma became another cautionary tale.
- [Maxine sighs] Gold digger?
164
00:11:15,259 --> 00:11:16,844
Please strike that from the record.
165
00:11:16,844 --> 00:11:19,346
- How very dare you!
- What?
166
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:21,723
[exhales sharply] Your Honor,
permission to approach the bench.
167
00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:24,393
- No, no, you don't do that here. It...
- Oh.
168
00:11:24,393 --> 00:11:27,104
This man is no caretaker.
169
00:11:27,104 --> 00:11:31,775
- He is a "pool boy"...
- [gasps]
170
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:34,820
...and he has been squatting
at Ms. Dellacorte's home
171
00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:36,530
with no written agreement.
172
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,532
Your Honor, I am a veteran.
173
00:11:39,575 --> 00:11:41,201
She is a pageant runner-up
174
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,202
- strutting around the house...
- [gasps]
175
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:44,037
- ...as if she owns it.
- Runner-up?
176
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,915
Oh, that is a gross misrepresentation.
Strike that from the record.
177
00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:48,792
- Order in the court! [exhales heavily]
- [judge] Pardon.
178
00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,836
- Excuse me. I was gonna say that.
- [sighs]
179
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:51,920
- Sorry.
- [gavel thuds]
180
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:56,466
We're gonna table this matter until one
of you comes up with documentation
181
00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:58,802
to back up the accusations
you've just made.
182
00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:01,972
Ah, yes. Your Honor,
I apologize for my outburst.
183
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,056
Adjourned.
184
00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:05,267
Thank you.
185
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:08,478
Oh, I don't know why you felt
the need to escalate.
186
00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:10,022
- [sighs, scoffs]
- Really?
187
00:12:10,022 --> 00:12:12,524
It's just so uncivilized
to get the law involved.
188
00:12:12,524 --> 00:12:15,402
You've been stealing from Norma.
Now you've stolen from me.
189
00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:16,945
[scoffs] From you? [chuckles]
190
00:12:16,945 --> 00:12:19,114
What do you have
that I could possibly want?
191
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:24,119
- Robert. Robert!
- What?
192
00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:26,246
[sighs] Listen.
193
00:12:27,998 --> 00:12:32,794
Clearly, we both want
what's best for dear Norma, right?
194
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:36,548
So maybe we could help each other.
195
00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:39,051
What's your game?
196
00:12:39,051 --> 00:12:44,014
I am set to throw Norma's end-of-season
Beach Ball with Mrs. Rollins.
197
00:12:44,014 --> 00:12:45,724
In Norma's honor, of course.
198
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:50,145
[smacks lips]
And... [sighs] ...Mrs. Rollins has mentioned
199
00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:56,527
a certain Rolodex of Norma's
that she has in a safety deposit box.
200
00:12:56,527 --> 00:12:59,154
You wouldn't happen to have that key,
would you?
201
00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:00,864
You didn't do it?
202
00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:05,244
I assure you I'm innocent of whatever
accusation has crossed your mind.
203
00:13:07,037 --> 00:13:09,414
I can't believe I'm gonna say this,
but I believe you.
204
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,125
Well, good.
205
00:13:23,846 --> 00:13:26,390
[Robert] Everyone is just out
for themselves, Norma.
206
00:13:27,891 --> 00:13:31,603
But you knew that, and you protected us.
207
00:13:33,522 --> 00:13:35,315
So, why can't I protect you?
208
00:13:42,948 --> 00:13:44,783
- [sighs]
- [door closes]
209
00:13:47,828 --> 00:13:48,829
Hey.
210
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:50,831
Hi.
211
00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:52,791
[chuckles]
212
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:56,879
How's Norma?
213
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:02,801
Same. Hmm. How's your father?
214
00:14:04,178 --> 00:14:05,012
Fading.
215
00:14:05,596 --> 00:14:06,972
I'm sorry to hear that.
216
00:14:06,972 --> 00:14:08,056
Thanks.
217
00:14:12,644 --> 00:14:13,896
Why did you do it?
218
00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:16,982
What are you talking about?
219
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:23,530
You come to my house,
you get me high, and you stole from me.
220
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,532
Well, technically, I stole from Norma.
221
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,117
A helpless old woman.
222
00:14:27,117 --> 00:14:28,619
That woman is not helpless.
223
00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:35,167
[breathes deeply]
224
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:44,718
I have a secret in that Rolodex,
and I can't have it get out.
225
00:14:46,887 --> 00:14:48,889
What about all the other secrets?
226
00:14:48,889 --> 00:14:52,100
Don't worry. They'll all end with me.
227
00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:55,437
Secrets destroy people.
228
00:14:56,230 --> 00:14:58,524
So I'm gonna destroy that fucking Rolodex.
229
00:15:00,776 --> 00:15:02,569
Better with you than with Maxine.
230
00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:05,030
[both chuckle]
231
00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:07,991
- This we know.
- [chuckles]
232
00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:11,328
You wanna meet my dad?
233
00:15:12,246 --> 00:15:13,247
I would love that.
234
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,208
Pop?
235
00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:17,709
- [Linda's father] Hey, there she is.
- Hey.
236
00:15:17,709 --> 00:15:22,756
[chuckles] I, uh, brought a friend.
I want you to meet Robert.
237
00:15:23,507 --> 00:15:25,843
He's, um, close with Norma.
238
00:15:25,843 --> 00:15:28,136
Ah, has the old, uh,
239
00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:34,601
frail "curmudgeoness"
tried to marry you off to my daughter yet?
240
00:15:35,352 --> 00:15:37,145
- Not yet.
- [Linda chuckles]
241
00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:38,981
- You wanna sit?
- [chuckles] Thank you.
242
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:43,485
Hey, Bud. Welcome.
243
00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:44,570
Pleasure.
244
00:15:44,570 --> 00:15:46,405
Dad, Robert was in Korea.
245
00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:49,616
Another pointless fucking war.
246
00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:52,411
Why you look at me like that?
247
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:56,582
Oh, no, I... [stammers] Dad,
I think he's just surprised that someone
248
00:15:56,582 --> 00:16:01,253
who inherited his fortune from warmongers
isn't a military apologist.
249
00:16:01,253 --> 00:16:04,131
I've been dying for 20 years, okay?
250
00:16:05,215 --> 00:16:10,512
And the one thing you learn
is how to confront the truth.
251
00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:12,097
[sighs]
252
00:16:14,391 --> 00:16:16,226
[Linda's father] My biggest regret in life
253
00:16:16,226 --> 00:16:21,315
is that I never did a goddamn thing
about that.
254
00:16:22,900 --> 00:16:27,070
But I guess that's my little piece
of luggage. [sighs]
255
00:16:30,115 --> 00:16:31,658
You ever read Timothy Leary?
256
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,243
No, should I?
257
00:16:33,952 --> 00:16:35,537
Does Pinocchio have a wooden dick?
258
00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:36,705
- Harvard grad...
- [chuckles]
259
00:16:36,705 --> 00:16:40,209
...high priest, the fucking master.
260
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:44,922
You got a book in your bookstore.
The Psychedelic Experience.
261
00:16:44,922 --> 00:16:47,257
- Get it for him. I know you got it.
- Cool.
262
00:16:47,257 --> 00:16:49,468
- Put it on my bill.
- Done.
263
00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:52,971
You got a presence, bud.
264
00:16:54,389 --> 00:16:55,724
You've got a presence.
265
00:16:57,059 --> 00:16:58,477
[chuckles]
266
00:16:58,477 --> 00:17:00,646
If the present trend continues,
267
00:17:01,146 --> 00:17:04,650
another four million
will join the welfare willingly...
268
00:17:04,650 --> 00:17:06,944
[Douglas] Hola, mi corazón.
269
00:17:06,944 --> 00:17:08,028
[scoffs]
270
00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:10,071
- Look at you, handsome man. [chuckles]
- Mmm.
271
00:17:10,656 --> 00:17:12,699
- Max. [exhales deeply]
- Yes?
272
00:17:14,242 --> 00:17:16,869
I did it. I quit my job.
273
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:19,498
So soon?
274
00:17:19,498 --> 00:17:22,376
Well, our fortune's
about to come in any day now, right?
275
00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:27,214
Yes. [chuckles] Yay. I'm working on it.
276
00:17:28,298 --> 00:17:29,299
What's that?
277
00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:33,720
Oh... Oh, well, you just wait here.
I'm gonna do my finishing touches.
278
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,180
Don't wanna be late. [chuckles]
279
00:17:40,352 --> 00:17:41,353
[chuckles]
280
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:54,908
[Raquel] Bienvenidos. Bonsoir. We want
to welcome you all to Old Havana night.
281
00:17:55,701 --> 00:17:58,871
A celebration of life
the way it used to be.
282
00:17:59,705 --> 00:18:01,164
The way it could be.
283
00:18:02,207 --> 00:18:04,835
A celebration of freedom!
284
00:18:04,835 --> 00:18:06,461
[cheering]
285
00:18:10,257 --> 00:18:13,093
[chattering, whistling, cheering]
286
00:18:13,802 --> 00:18:16,013
Babe, you didn't tell me there
was gonna be craps.
287
00:18:16,013 --> 00:18:19,600
Well, now, let's not get ahead
of ourselves, Douglas. [chuckles]
288
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:21,727
Dougie-doo, you old bungbucket!
289
00:18:21,727 --> 00:18:23,187
Damn my eyes, Perry Donahue.
290
00:18:23,187 --> 00:18:26,773
Babe, would you get us a few drinks?
I'm gonna warm up my throwing hand.
291
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,817
Well, well. Not too warm, okay? [chuckles]
292
00:18:28,817 --> 00:18:30,652
[Perry] Come on,
let's go warm up those tables, baby.
293
00:18:30,652 --> 00:18:33,697
[rumba music playing]
294
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:44,791
[gasps, sighs]
295
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:47,628
[gasps]
296
00:18:47,628 --> 00:18:51,173
[cheering, gasping]
297
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:37,803
Have you ever seen such
a tacky shit parade in your life?
298
00:19:38,387 --> 00:19:39,680
Gosh, no. [chuckles]
299
00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:41,890
What's wrong with it?
300
00:19:42,391 --> 00:19:45,644
[scoffs] Raquel took
the most beloved hotel in Palm Beach
301
00:19:45,644 --> 00:19:47,187
and "bacchanalized" it.
302
00:19:47,896 --> 00:19:52,150
This is why it's important for me
to co-host the Beach Ball, Maxine.
303
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:54,820
Have you managed to locate the key
to the safety deposit box?
304
00:19:54,820 --> 00:19:58,657
Evelyn, I have turned that house
inside and out. No luck.
305
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:04,288
We all want to give a warm welcome home
to my dear husband, Pinky.
306
00:20:04,288 --> 00:20:05,706
[cheering, whistling]
307
00:20:05,706 --> 00:20:06,790
[chuckles]
308
00:20:07,457 --> 00:20:11,253
Welcome home from Sing Sing.
It's true. Just last Tuesday.
309
00:20:11,253 --> 00:20:14,423
These lucky wheels and tables are
from my old casino.
310
00:20:15,299 --> 00:20:17,384
Everything you win, you get to keep.
311
00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:22,055
Everything you lose goes
to our struggling Batista refugees, huh?
312
00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:23,015
[guests applauding]
313
00:20:23,015 --> 00:20:24,266
He's a mobster.
314
00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:29,688
They don't call it that, but that's
what he is. A gangster out on parole.
315
00:20:30,606 --> 00:20:34,401
Mark my words, this is the face of things
to come in Palm Beach.
316
00:20:34,401 --> 00:20:36,486
The rise of the common criminal.
317
00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:38,989
- Hideous. I hate criminals.
- [chuckles]
318
00:20:39,615 --> 00:20:41,158
I can feel it happening already.
319
00:20:42,451 --> 00:20:43,452
Feel what?
320
00:20:43,452 --> 00:20:45,162
My social casting-out.
321
00:20:45,162 --> 00:20:46,622
Why, Evelyn?
322
00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:51,168
With Norma embolized,
you are the woman to know in Palm Beach.
323
00:20:54,087 --> 00:20:55,130
I don't like you, Maxine.
324
00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:58,550
And though there are plenty of rumors
about my actual feelings for Skeet,
325
00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:00,385
I'm lonely without him.
326
00:21:01,386 --> 00:21:03,805
He was always a bit of a prick,
but he was fun. [chuckles]
327
00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,599
He used to take me out dancing.
328
00:21:06,433 --> 00:21:08,602
He was terrible at it, but he was game.
329
00:21:08,602 --> 00:21:11,522
- Hmm.
- And I had enough style to cover for him.
330
00:21:13,649 --> 00:21:15,901
Now he lies about in his robe all day,
331
00:21:15,901 --> 00:21:18,820
slowly but surely turning
into a hippie Howard Hughes.
332
00:21:19,488 --> 00:21:21,949
It is no picnic caring
for an ailing spouse.
333
00:21:22,950 --> 00:21:25,118
The last time I was with him,
his catheter came loose,
334
00:21:25,118 --> 00:21:27,454
and he accidentally shot urine
into my mouth.
335
00:21:27,955 --> 00:21:28,956
I'm so sorry.
336
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:32,835
At the same time, I have so many questions
about how that happened.
337
00:21:32,835 --> 00:21:35,921
I've got nothing left
to cement my status in this town.
338
00:21:35,921 --> 00:21:37,631
Nothing but the Beach Ball.
339
00:21:37,631 --> 00:21:40,342
How can I compete with stricken infants
and a bacchanal like this?
340
00:21:40,342 --> 00:21:41,718
[Dinah] Maxine!
341
00:21:41,718 --> 00:21:43,846
Pool. Now. Excuse us.
342
00:21:43,846 --> 00:21:46,348
If I were you, I wouldn't treat me
as if I were invisible, Dinah.
343
00:21:47,224 --> 00:21:48,892
Then don't become invisible, Evelyn.
344
00:21:49,518 --> 00:21:52,062
- Come on, Maxine. Come on.
- Coming.
345
00:21:59,444 --> 00:22:01,113
[grunting]
346
00:22:02,948 --> 00:22:06,326
Eddie's jealous of Perry.
Says he's going to kill him.
347
00:22:06,326 --> 00:22:09,746
What?
Wh... Eddie's gonna murder your husband?
348
00:22:09,746 --> 00:22:12,833
Please. He's only kidding, I think.
349
00:22:12,833 --> 00:22:15,085
Regardless,
I thought it was kind of sweet.
350
00:22:15,586 --> 00:22:18,255
Why is Eddie jealous of Perry?
Wouldn't it be the other way around?
351
00:22:18,255 --> 00:22:20,007
That's exactly what I said.
352
00:22:20,007 --> 00:22:22,009
Eddie asked if Perry and I still had sex,
353
00:22:22,009 --> 00:22:23,510
- and I said, well, if a hand job...
- Oh.
354
00:22:23,510 --> 00:22:25,721
...on the Chris-Craft last Wednesday
counted as sex, then sure.
355
00:22:25,721 --> 00:22:27,890
But Perry had just bought me
a new tennis bracelet,
356
00:22:27,890 --> 00:22:30,184
so I figured... [scoffs] ...what the hell.
357
00:22:30,184 --> 00:22:32,811
Anyway,
that plus Douglas being back in town
358
00:22:32,811 --> 00:22:34,730
had bought me more time
with Eddie than ever.
359
00:22:34,730 --> 00:22:38,233
So maybe, Maxine,
I should... [inhales deeply] ...thank you.
360
00:22:38,859 --> 00:22:40,527
- Well, you're welcome. [chuckles]
- [chuckles]
361
00:22:40,527 --> 00:22:43,155
What does my Douglas have to do
with a handy?
362
00:22:43,155 --> 00:22:44,239
Oh, you silly goose.
363
00:22:44,239 --> 00:22:46,825
Apparently,
Douglas and Perry were inseparable
364
00:22:46,825 --> 00:22:49,494
back in their prep school days,
and now they're back at it,
365
00:22:49,494 --> 00:22:51,121
which helps me avoid scrutiny.
366
00:22:51,121 --> 00:22:52,748
- [chuckles]
- [clicks tongue, sighs]
367
00:22:52,748 --> 00:22:55,834
Perry says that he and Douglas bring out
the worst in each other.
368
00:22:55,834 --> 00:22:59,421
But he laughs every time he says it,
so I interpret that to mean fun.
369
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,714
Oh, the worst?
370
00:23:00,714 --> 00:23:01,924
[chuckles] The worst.
371
00:23:01,924 --> 00:23:05,719
I'm sure by "worst" he means they do nice,
good, clean stuff. [chuckles]
372
00:23:05,719 --> 00:23:07,763
- Have you met Perry? [laughing]
- [chuckles]
373
00:23:12,392 --> 00:23:14,686
[chattering, laughing]
374
00:23:18,815 --> 00:23:20,651
[Douglas] Come on, baby. Come on, dice.
375
00:23:20,651 --> 00:23:22,402
[Perry chuckles]
376
00:23:22,402 --> 00:23:25,697
- Come on, lucky hog. Sixes!
- Come on!
377
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:27,991
- [guests] Aw. Oh.
- Oh. [groans]
378
00:23:27,991 --> 00:23:30,786
Douglas, sweetie, why don't we sit
this one out?
379
00:23:30,786 --> 00:23:32,079
Come, let's go have a rum punch.
380
00:23:32,079 --> 00:23:36,792
No! I believe in us, Maxine.
I am doubling down.
381
00:23:36,792 --> 00:23:37,751
[chuckles]
382
00:23:37,751 --> 00:23:38,669
- Right.
- [Douglas] Mmm.
383
00:23:38,669 --> 00:23:39,878
Place your bets.
384
00:23:44,216 --> 00:23:46,844
Bartender,
can I get a bourbon neat and a grassho...
385
00:23:46,844 --> 00:23:50,180
Grasshopper? Hi, gold digger.
386
00:23:50,180 --> 00:23:53,767
Hi, pool boy.
Didn't think you'd be working this party.
387
00:23:53,767 --> 00:23:54,852
Someone has to work.
388
00:23:54,852 --> 00:23:55,978
Hmm. Pity to be you.
389
00:23:56,562 --> 00:23:59,565
[rumba music playing]
390
00:23:59,565 --> 00:24:01,316
[guests applauding, cheering]
391
00:24:09,533 --> 00:24:15,914
Everybody, I hope you will all join us
on the dance floor for a rumba!
392
00:24:15,914 --> 00:24:22,171
Dance freely, drink freely,
spend freely, love freely.
393
00:24:26,675 --> 00:24:29,344
[Maxine] Jeezy-creezy. Norma's ruby.
394
00:24:29,344 --> 00:24:30,470
[gasps]
395
00:24:34,183 --> 00:24:36,768
I wonder how Raquel
got a hold of Norma's ruby,
396
00:24:36,768 --> 00:24:39,938
which I remember putting
in Norma's jewelry box at Destiny Vistas.
397
00:24:40,606 --> 00:24:44,651
As her caretaker, don't you have
unrestricted access to her jewelry?
398
00:24:44,651 --> 00:24:47,196
Same access you have as a loving family.
399
00:24:47,196 --> 00:24:49,656
I wonder what the judge
would make of this.
400
00:24:49,656 --> 00:24:51,783
[Pinky] Okay, ladies and gentlemen.
Damas y caballeros.
401
00:24:52,534 --> 00:24:55,162
We're gonna do this
the way we did it in El Tropicana.
402
00:24:55,162 --> 00:24:59,750
Everybody grab yourself a partner
and get ready to rumba!
403
00:24:59,750 --> 00:25:02,211
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna go dance with the hostess.
404
00:25:02,211 --> 00:25:03,795
Those rubies have a story to tell.
405
00:25:07,299 --> 00:25:08,300
[sighs]
406
00:25:10,469 --> 00:25:11,512
[grunts] Oh.
407
00:25:33,075 --> 00:25:34,368
[chuckles] Hello!
408
00:25:39,373 --> 00:25:42,167
- Shall we dance?
- Oh, papi, I thought you'd never ask.
409
00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:44,503
- [Maxine] Raquel! [gasps]
- Hey, babe! It's time to rumba.
410
00:25:44,503 --> 00:25:46,588
Oh. [chuckles]
Silly, I don't know how to rumba.
411
00:25:46,588 --> 00:25:47,673
Ah, neither do I.
412
00:25:47,673 --> 00:25:49,007
[Maxine pants]
413
00:25:49,633 --> 00:25:51,051
So, how much did you win?
414
00:25:51,051 --> 00:25:52,553
- A ton.
- Really?
415
00:25:52,553 --> 00:25:55,055
Yeah, but I lost even more. But who cares?
416
00:25:55,055 --> 00:25:57,641
It's small beans compared to
what we got coming to us, right?
417
00:25:57,641 --> 00:25:58,725
Yeah.
418
00:25:58,725 --> 00:26:02,437
Perry has got a tasty real estate deal
coming through with his frogs,
419
00:26:02,437 --> 00:26:05,107
and he says we can get in
on the ground floor.
420
00:26:05,732 --> 00:26:08,694
Wow. Seems too good to be true.
421
00:26:08,694 --> 00:26:09,987
I know, right?
422
00:26:11,822 --> 00:26:13,490
Hey, babe? Babe?
423
00:26:13,490 --> 00:26:16,493
Norma was always very tight-lipped
about your friendship.
424
00:26:17,327 --> 00:26:21,123
We had... have a very special relationship.
425
00:26:21,123 --> 00:26:26,545
I'm sure you brought her a lot,
a lot of pleasure. Rumors abound.
426
00:26:26,545 --> 00:26:28,547
Imagine with the poor dear
out of commission,
427
00:26:29,256 --> 00:26:30,799
you're gonna need a new sponsor.
428
00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:33,969
- Hmm, maybe. Maybe not.
- [gasps]
429
00:26:33,969 --> 00:26:37,723
Let's say within the next few days,
I'll be in a more responsible position.
430
00:26:37,723 --> 00:26:38,640
[Raquel chuckles]
431
00:26:39,474 --> 00:26:40,559
- Speaking of...
- [Raquel gasps]
432
00:26:41,101 --> 00:26:42,436
...great necklace.
433
00:26:42,436 --> 00:26:43,812
- Oh.
- How'd you come by it?
434
00:26:44,313 --> 00:26:48,233
Oh. Oh, Pinky, he's always getting me
these little trinkets.
435
00:26:48,859 --> 00:26:51,236
There's a lot more where this came from
436
00:26:51,820 --> 00:26:54,406
if you can do that voodoo
you apparently do so well.
437
00:26:55,032 --> 00:26:58,368
Okay, ladies and gentlemen.
We're gonna switch it up.
438
00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:02,372
Turn to your left. Turn to your right.
439
00:27:03,916 --> 00:27:07,419
Now find yourself a new rumba partner!
440
00:27:07,419 --> 00:27:09,505
[grunts] Find me later, Robert!
441
00:27:13,258 --> 00:27:14,801
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
- Oh.
442
00:27:17,304 --> 00:27:18,639
Hello!
443
00:27:20,098 --> 00:27:21,099
Oh! Perry.
444
00:27:21,099 --> 00:27:22,643
Mrs. Dougerie-doo.
445
00:27:22,643 --> 00:27:23,727
Ooh. [chuckles]
446
00:27:24,228 --> 00:27:27,689
I hear you and my Douglas are cooking up
quite a little business scheme.
447
00:27:27,689 --> 00:27:28,941
- [Perry chuckles]
- [grunts]
448
00:27:28,941 --> 00:27:31,944
Yes, sirree. It's good to have
my wingman back in town
449
00:27:31,944 --> 00:27:33,862
after hiding out
from us for all these years.
450
00:27:33,862 --> 00:27:35,781
Yeah. You're breeding frogs? [chuckles]
451
00:27:35,781 --> 00:27:39,117
- [chuckles] Frogs! You're such a pip.
- Oh. [chuckles]
452
00:27:39,117 --> 00:27:44,790
No, it's my Luxembourgian investors.
It's a global venture, but local too.
453
00:27:52,923 --> 00:27:54,341
And switch again!
454
00:27:54,341 --> 00:27:56,802
- Have to switch. [chuckles]
- Yeah. [chuckles]
455
00:27:56,802 --> 00:27:58,387
- All right, toodles.
- [chuckles]
456
00:28:12,276 --> 00:28:14,987
And switch your partners one more time!
457
00:28:14,987 --> 00:28:18,073
If you get left out in the cold,
make a little threesome.
458
00:28:18,073 --> 00:28:24,162
A Cubano sandwich. That's a little ham,
a little pork and a little cheese. Hey!
459
00:28:24,162 --> 00:28:25,080
Robert!
460
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:26,415
- Hey, Raquel.
- [chuckles]
461
00:28:26,415 --> 00:28:29,001
Oh, Raquel, what a beautiful necklace.
462
00:28:29,001 --> 00:28:30,127
Oh. [chuckles]
463
00:28:30,127 --> 00:28:32,796
Pinky gave it to her.
I wonder where he got it from.
464
00:28:32,796 --> 00:28:34,715
- Maxine.
- Why is everyone talking
465
00:28:34,715 --> 00:28:36,341
- about my necklace?
- Shall we?
466
00:28:36,341 --> 00:28:39,136
Check it out. I think
I'm finally getting the hang of this.
467
00:28:41,430 --> 00:28:42,806
Absolutely.
468
00:28:44,766 --> 00:28:47,519
Listen, I was thinking.
Um, since Perry's deal is still brewing,
469
00:28:47,519 --> 00:28:50,355
maybe it was a bit of
a rash decision for you to quit,
470
00:28:50,355 --> 00:28:54,276
and you should go back and tell them
maybe you... you're having second thoughts?
471
00:28:54,276 --> 00:28:55,194
It's too late.
472
00:28:55,194 --> 00:29:00,282
[exhales sharply] Well, it's never
too late to say, "I made a mistake."
473
00:29:00,282 --> 00:29:03,785
How could this be a mistake?
Choosing you. Choosing this life.
474
00:29:03,785 --> 00:29:05,954
- Look at all the fun we're having.
- [chuckling]
475
00:29:05,954 --> 00:29:07,664
Plus, what could go wrong?
476
00:29:08,248 --> 00:29:10,000
Oh, uh, could you excuse me
just for a minute?
477
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:11,585
I'll be back. Just keep doing that.
478
00:29:18,091 --> 00:29:18,926
Mitzi.
479
00:29:18,926 --> 00:29:22,930
Maxine. I'm so excited.
This is my first modeling gig.
480
00:29:22,930 --> 00:29:25,641
Sweetie, this isn't really a modeling gig.
481
00:29:25,641 --> 00:29:29,102
And there's so many eligible men.
I've already forgotten my boyfriend.
482
00:29:29,102 --> 00:29:31,522
Oh. Oh, well.
I guess there's good news in that.
483
00:29:32,773 --> 00:29:33,774
Hello, friend.
484
00:29:34,274 --> 00:29:35,275
Mary.
485
00:29:36,151 --> 00:29:38,237
- Oh.
- I've been looking for you.
486
00:29:39,196 --> 00:29:40,948
Wow, you're dancing the boy part.
[chuckles]
487
00:29:40,948 --> 00:29:42,950
- Well, I went to a girls' school.
- [chuckles]
488
00:29:42,950 --> 00:29:48,038
Half of us had to learn on the left foot.
Half on the right. I was a left-foot girl.
489
00:29:48,038 --> 00:29:50,249
Oh, well... Oh. How handy.
490
00:29:50,249 --> 00:29:52,626
- [Mitzi chuckles]
- [Perry laughs]
491
00:29:52,626 --> 00:29:54,503
- You'll never believe what happened.
- Mmm.
492
00:29:54,503 --> 00:29:59,550
You wrote me a funny check for the Fibs.
It bounced like a red rubber ball.
493
00:29:59,550 --> 00:30:01,301
Oh. [stammers, chuckles] Oh.
494
00:30:01,301 --> 00:30:03,762
I'm just juggling
so many accounts these days.
495
00:30:03,762 --> 00:30:05,514
I probably just wrote it
from the wrong one.
496
00:30:05,514 --> 00:30:07,891
Oh, yes. That happens to all of us.
497
00:30:07,891 --> 00:30:11,770
Guess I'll have my accountant sort it out
in the morning. [chuckles, grunts]
498
00:30:11,770 --> 00:30:13,647
- See that you do.
- Okay.
499
00:30:14,231 --> 00:30:15,065
[grunts]
500
00:30:15,065 --> 00:30:16,733
- You wouldn't want to get a reputation.
- Okay.
501
00:30:16,733 --> 00:30:18,986
- [Mary grunts]
- Well, oh! Oh!
502
00:30:19,611 --> 00:30:20,988
With the Beach Ball coming up.
503
00:30:22,531 --> 00:30:26,243
Oh, look... [chuckles] ...there's my-my purse.
I've been looking for that. Uh...
504
00:30:27,411 --> 00:30:28,245
[grunts]
505
00:30:28,996 --> 00:30:31,748
I just gotta get some mints for later.
506
00:30:37,671 --> 00:30:38,589
You're so tall.
507
00:30:38,589 --> 00:30:40,174
[chuckles] I guess.
508
00:30:40,757 --> 00:30:43,218
You know, some men would be
intimidated by that.
509
00:30:44,511 --> 00:30:47,181
I, however, am not.
510
00:30:47,181 --> 00:30:48,849
[Raquel] I've been thinking.
511
00:30:48,849 --> 00:30:52,561
Whatever Norma paid you,
I'm willing to double it.
512
00:30:53,187 --> 00:30:54,771
I don't need your sponsorship.
513
00:30:55,689 --> 00:30:58,525
[scoffs]
I guess you still belong to Norma.
514
00:30:59,026 --> 00:31:01,153
[chuckles]
You know what else belongs to Norma?
515
00:31:01,778 --> 00:31:02,779
What?
516
00:31:03,739 --> 00:31:07,034
That necklace was stolen
from Norma Dellacorte.
517
00:31:08,410 --> 00:31:09,411
[gasps]
518
00:31:11,371 --> 00:31:13,790
Are you accusing my husband of theft?
519
00:31:13,790 --> 00:31:17,711
Hmm. I just want it back.
No questions asked.
520
00:31:17,711 --> 00:31:21,173
It would be a shame
if Pinky had to go back on vacation.
521
00:31:21,798 --> 00:31:22,799
- [gasps]
- Wouldn't it?
522
00:31:29,264 --> 00:31:30,807
Raquel. [whispers] I'll fix it.
523
00:31:30,807 --> 00:31:31,892
What is it, Maxine?
524
00:31:35,270 --> 00:31:37,356
[inhales sharply, grunts]
525
00:31:47,824 --> 00:31:49,993
Nothing. Nothing.
526
00:31:49,993 --> 00:31:50,911
Mmm.
527
00:31:55,082 --> 00:31:56,083
[sighs]
528
00:32:05,425 --> 00:32:07,386
Maxine, do you have a pen?
529
00:32:07,386 --> 00:32:09,805
I met a really cute guy,
and he wants my number.
530
00:32:09,805 --> 00:32:11,014
These things don't have pockets.
531
00:32:11,014 --> 00:32:12,432
Okay. Here.
532
00:32:13,183 --> 00:32:14,685
- Thank you. [chuckles]
- Okay. Be careful.
533
00:32:29,908 --> 00:32:32,578
Sergeant Tom Sanka? Maxine Dellacorte.
534
00:32:33,579 --> 00:32:35,330
I'd like to report a stolen jewel.
535
00:32:38,876 --> 00:32:43,297
Indeed, your Honor, as you can see by
my sworn, typed affidavit,
536
00:32:43,297 --> 00:32:47,593
this ruby necklace was recovered
from the Havana Nights Gala
537
00:32:47,593 --> 00:32:51,388
and then found in Mr. Diaz's pocket.
538
00:32:51,388 --> 00:32:52,389
[attendees gasp]
539
00:32:52,389 --> 00:32:59,062
The same Mr. Diaz who came to this
very court asking for conservatorship.
540
00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:03,859
[chuckles] Yes. This precious stone,
ladies and gentlemen,
541
00:33:03,859 --> 00:33:07,863
was in fact stolen
from the Dellacorte home
542
00:33:07,863 --> 00:33:12,326
where Mr. Diaz purportedly
worked as a "caretaker."
543
00:33:12,326 --> 00:33:14,411
[guards, inmates chattering]
544
00:33:17,497 --> 00:33:18,916
It's your lucky day.
545
00:33:25,506 --> 00:33:26,840
Somebody posted bail for you.
546
00:33:29,843 --> 00:33:35,015
And yet, in my heart of hearts,
I know Mr. Diaz is a troubled man.
547
00:33:37,059 --> 00:33:41,480
Shall I be granted conservatorship,
on behalf of Norma and her estate...
548
00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:46,360
[inhales deeply] ...we have generously
decided not to press charges.
549
00:33:47,444 --> 00:33:49,029
I know she would want it that way.
550
00:33:49,613 --> 00:33:51,406
[attendees applauding]
551
00:33:52,658 --> 00:33:53,700
[chuckles]
552
00:33:57,162 --> 00:33:59,748
In the matter of Norma Dellacorte,
553
00:33:59,748 --> 00:34:04,545
the court hereby grants sole custody
and conservatorship
554
00:34:05,796 --> 00:34:08,090
to Mrs. Douglas Dellacorte.
555
00:34:08,090 --> 00:34:10,259
And as such, all trusts, bank accounts,
556
00:34:10,259 --> 00:34:12,010
- safety deposit boxes...
- [breathes deeply]
557
00:34:12,010 --> 00:34:13,428
...and any offshore assets
558
00:34:13,428 --> 00:34:18,141
shall immediately be transferred
to her control and discretion.
559
00:34:18,891 --> 00:34:20,060
[breathes deeply]
560
00:34:20,643 --> 00:34:22,478
Under one condition.
561
00:34:23,522 --> 00:34:28,277
Anything. [sniffles] Anything for dear
Aunt Norma, Your Honor. [breathes heavily]
562
00:34:29,194 --> 00:34:33,574
[Douglas] Are you sure you want to
keep her here? It is a big responsibility.
563
00:34:33,574 --> 00:34:35,534
[Maxine] Oh. We're up to it.
564
00:34:37,159 --> 00:34:39,746
- That smell is kind of unpleasant.
- [shushing]
565
00:34:39,746 --> 00:34:42,248
I don't know
where exactly it's coming from.
566
00:34:42,248 --> 00:34:46,295
[shushes] Douglas. We don't know
what she can hear and not hear.
567
00:34:46,879 --> 00:34:50,090
The home says she's
in a "twilight stupor."
568
00:34:50,090 --> 00:34:52,717
Which, from what I understand,
is catty-corner to coma.
569
00:34:53,217 --> 00:34:55,219
[groans]
570
00:34:56,429 --> 00:34:57,431
Well, can she talk?
571
00:34:58,015 --> 00:34:59,850
Oh, well, poor dear can sort of moan
and yodel,
572
00:34:59,850 --> 00:35:02,102
but consonants are off the table.
573
00:35:03,312 --> 00:35:06,857
I don't know. Shouldn't she be
under the care of medical professionals?
574
00:35:06,857 --> 00:35:08,442
[Maxine] No, no, no.
575
00:35:08,442 --> 00:35:11,486
Look, all we have to do is
flip her over every 30 minutes
576
00:35:11,486 --> 00:35:14,907
to keep her blood flowing,
give her a shot every six hours.
577
00:35:14,907 --> 00:35:16,533
The home showed me how to do it.
578
00:35:16,533 --> 00:35:17,618
Seriously?
579
00:35:18,660 --> 00:35:22,748
[sighs] You know, in the short
amount of time I've spent with Norma,
580
00:35:23,582 --> 00:35:27,669
I've grown kind of close to her.
Poor dear.
581
00:35:27,669 --> 00:35:30,255
She got a rotten deal withering away
in that place.
582
00:35:30,255 --> 00:35:32,341
We are gonna show her
the best care we can.
583
00:35:32,341 --> 00:35:34,593
Well, I guess it's the least
we can do for her
584
00:35:35,135 --> 00:35:37,763
considering all the ka-ching
that's coming our way.
585
00:35:39,848 --> 00:35:44,686
[sighs, inhales deeply]
Um, about that. [chuckles]
586
00:35:44,686 --> 00:35:48,649
Uh, Douglas,
there's something I have to tell you.
587
00:35:49,441 --> 00:35:50,442
Max?
588
00:35:51,735 --> 00:35:56,573
Well, while I was attending to
Norma's guardianship,
589
00:35:56,573 --> 00:35:58,825
I became aware of something
that will disturb you.
590
00:35:59,409 --> 00:36:00,244
Uh-huh.
591
00:36:01,662 --> 00:36:08,043
When she passes,
her estate is going to a cat sanctuary.
592
00:36:13,090 --> 00:36:14,258
Why would she do that?
593
00:36:14,258 --> 00:36:17,594
I'm sure she was non compos mentis
when she made that decision.
594
00:36:18,095 --> 00:36:21,139
[stammers] I-I'm her favorite nephew.
I'm her only nephew.
595
00:36:21,807 --> 00:36:23,267
I th-thought she loved me.
596
00:36:23,267 --> 00:36:25,352
- [Maxine] She did. She does.
- [wheezing]
597
00:36:26,228 --> 00:36:28,730
[sighs] We both know
it was me she never liked.
598
00:36:30,107 --> 00:36:31,108
I'm gonna kill her.
599
00:36:31,108 --> 00:36:33,151
No. No! Don't say that.
600
00:36:34,069 --> 00:36:38,574
It is of the utmost importance
that we keep her alive as long as we can.
601
00:36:39,658 --> 00:36:40,659
Because?
602
00:36:40,659 --> 00:36:43,328
Because it is the right thing to do.
603
00:36:44,580 --> 00:36:49,042
And because, silver lining,
604
00:36:49,042 --> 00:36:51,962
the two of you now have time
to work on your relationship.
605
00:36:53,088 --> 00:36:58,177
And because, as her legal conservator,
606
00:36:58,177 --> 00:37:02,681
I have permission to pay us a salary
commensurate with her level of care.
607
00:37:08,770 --> 00:37:13,275
So as long as she's in a stupor,
we get the checkbook.
608
00:37:13,984 --> 00:37:16,403
And if she dies, it goes to the cat place.
609
00:37:17,446 --> 00:37:19,656
Palm Beach Pedigree Feline Conservancy.
610
00:37:19,656 --> 00:37:20,741
Huh.
611
00:37:21,783 --> 00:37:24,786
I just wanted to have it
all figured out before I told you.
612
00:37:25,370 --> 00:37:27,247
You know, cushion the blow and all that.
613
00:37:27,247 --> 00:37:30,501
Oh, I can't believe you did this for me.
For us.
614
00:37:30,501 --> 00:37:32,503
- [bell dings]
- Oh, oh! Time to flip.
615
00:37:33,212 --> 00:37:34,880
Come on. Here. Maybe we take this down.
616
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:37,257
- I don't know. To be honest...
- How we gonna do this?
617
00:37:37,257 --> 00:37:38,926
...she's kind of creeping me out.
618
00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:41,011
Is she looking at us?
619
00:37:41,011 --> 00:37:43,430
[whispers]
Douglas, maybe she can hear you.
620
00:37:43,430 --> 00:37:46,475
On my three. One, two, three.
621
00:37:46,475 --> 00:37:47,809
- [grunts]
- [Douglas sighs]
622
00:37:53,190 --> 00:37:54,399
[Maxine] I don't believe it.
623
00:37:54,983 --> 00:37:55,984
The key.
624
00:37:56,693 --> 00:37:57,694
The what?
625
00:37:59,696 --> 00:38:03,992
It's no Four Seasons, but here we are.
626
00:38:03,992 --> 00:38:05,452
- [sighs]
- [whispers] There we go.
627
00:38:05,452 --> 00:38:07,037
Thank you so much for helping me out.
628
00:38:07,037 --> 00:38:08,539
Yeah, sure.
629
00:38:09,206 --> 00:38:11,542
I can't believe
they didn't give you conservatorship.
630
00:38:12,334 --> 00:38:14,336
You're the one
that really loves Norma. [sighs]
631
00:38:16,296 --> 00:38:17,965
Seems to be the way for people like me.
632
00:38:18,715 --> 00:38:20,175
[chuckles] People like you?
633
00:38:24,972 --> 00:38:26,014
Yes. People like me.
634
00:38:31,103 --> 00:38:34,356
People like you might really like,
uh, reading material in aisle seven.
635
00:38:39,236 --> 00:38:43,907
It seems we're on the cusp of victory
after all. Congratulations, Maxine.
636
00:38:43,907 --> 00:38:48,203
Oh. My one hope is that you
and Linda can mend fences.
637
00:38:48,704 --> 00:38:51,748
I hate that there's tension
between my two closest friends in town.
638
00:38:51,748 --> 00:38:53,584
Her name's Penelope, dear.
639
00:38:53,584 --> 00:38:56,128
The Linda business is
a pompous affectation.
640
00:38:56,128 --> 00:38:58,964
She's been quite clear
that she identifies as Linda.
641
00:38:59,464 --> 00:39:02,676
You're an awfully good friend to Linda,
all things considered.
642
00:39:03,635 --> 00:39:04,636
All things considered?
643
00:39:05,596 --> 00:39:07,639
- Ladies, who has the key?
- Oh.
644
00:39:09,391 --> 00:39:10,559
[chattering]
645
00:39:14,271 --> 00:39:15,272
Seven.
646
00:39:21,278 --> 00:39:22,738
[whispering] Seven, seven, seven.
647
00:39:32,122 --> 00:39:33,123
[breathing shakily]
648
00:39:34,833 --> 00:39:35,834
[exhales sharply]
649
00:40:01,318 --> 00:40:02,402
[exhales sharply]
650
00:40:02,402 --> 00:40:04,321
- [Virginia] What's that?
- Nothing.
651
00:40:05,155 --> 00:40:06,740
Is that why you hiding nothing?
652
00:40:06,740 --> 00:40:08,200
I got nothing to hide.
653
00:40:09,701 --> 00:40:10,786
Clearly.
654
00:40:15,666 --> 00:40:16,667
Ah, hell.
655
00:40:27,135 --> 00:40:28,804
I think that's everything.
656
00:40:28,804 --> 00:40:30,639
If you need anything else,
I'll be right outside.
657
00:40:30,639 --> 00:40:32,850
Please tell Norma to get well soon.
658
00:40:32,850 --> 00:40:34,142
- Thank you.
- I will.
659
00:40:34,142 --> 00:40:35,269
[Evelyn chuckles]
660
00:40:37,729 --> 00:40:38,564
All right.
661
00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:41,275
Wow.
662
00:40:43,902 --> 00:40:45,529
[Evelyn] Norma was always eclectic.
663
00:40:45,529 --> 00:40:46,613
[Maxine] Ugh.
664
00:40:46,613 --> 00:40:47,906
Let's look in the next box.
665
00:40:49,283 --> 00:40:50,951
- All right. [sighs]
- Hmm.
666
00:40:55,122 --> 00:40:56,248
- [Maxine gasps]
- Oh.
667
00:40:56,957 --> 00:40:58,292
[inhales sharply]
668
00:40:58,292 --> 00:41:00,586
Norma wears that every year
at the Beach Ball.
669
00:41:02,421 --> 00:41:03,797
And this year will be no different.
670
00:41:03,797 --> 00:41:07,301
[sighs] Must be in that one. Come on.
671
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:11,805
Are you ready? [breathes sharply] Ta-da!
672
00:41:15,058 --> 00:41:16,393
- It's empty.
- [grunts]
673
00:41:16,393 --> 00:41:17,644
Is there a fourth box?
674
00:41:17,644 --> 00:41:19,396
- Well, this is unconscionable.
- Oh, no.
675
00:41:19,396 --> 00:41:22,232
There's no place else
she would've kept it. [sighs]
676
00:41:22,232 --> 00:41:25,819
Well... [stammers] ...unless I missed it
amongst the other valuables.
677
00:41:25,819 --> 00:41:29,489
[scoffs] For fuck's sake, Maxine.
You really are completely useless.
678
00:41:30,407 --> 00:41:31,783
- Evelyn.
- [Evelyn sighs]
679
00:41:33,911 --> 00:41:34,912
[scoffs]
680
00:41:46,048 --> 00:41:47,049
Someday.
681
00:42:04,483 --> 00:42:05,484
Norma.
682
00:42:07,778 --> 00:42:09,029
Quite the gunslinger.
683
00:42:18,580 --> 00:42:21,583
"Skeet Rollins cordially requests
the pleasure of your company
684
00:42:21,583 --> 00:42:25,754
at the wedding of his beloved daughter
Penelope Rollins to..."
685
00:42:28,090 --> 00:42:31,426
Douglas! [breathes heavily]
686
00:42:33,971 --> 00:42:35,597
Douglas! [breathes heavily]
687
00:42:36,598 --> 00:42:38,600
[grumbles, breathes heavily]
688
00:42:38,600 --> 00:42:43,605
Douglas Darby Dellacorte Simmons! Douglas!
689
00:42:53,490 --> 00:42:54,825
[breathes heavily]
690
00:42:55,742 --> 00:42:57,077
[Norma, slurring] Weh-wah-wah!
691
00:43:01,498 --> 00:43:03,792
Norma? [breathes shakily]
692
00:43:05,169 --> 00:43:07,421
Norma, did you... did you say something?
693
00:43:08,380 --> 00:43:09,506
[slurring] Weh-wah-wah!
694
00:43:09,506 --> 00:43:11,383
[Maxine stammers] What?
695
00:43:12,593 --> 00:43:14,469
[slurring] Weh-wah-wah.
696
00:43:15,179 --> 00:43:17,806
- [imitates slurred speech]
- [slurring] Weh-wah-wah.
697
00:43:17,806 --> 00:43:20,225
- [imitates slurred speech]
- [sighs]
698
00:43:20,726 --> 00:43:22,644
[slurring, carefully] Weh-wah-wah.
699
00:43:22,644 --> 00:43:26,190
- [imitating Norma] Rahr... rah-vwar.
- [slurring] Weh-wah-wah.
700
00:43:29,026 --> 00:43:29,860
[slurring] Weh-wah-wah.
701
00:43:29,860 --> 00:43:32,029
I don't know what wah-wah-wah-wah is.
702
00:43:32,029 --> 00:43:33,113
[shouting] Weh-wah-wah!
703
00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:46,293
- [gunshot]
- [Norma, slurring] Weh-wah-wah!
54968
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