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1
00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,507
Dr. Ravelli.
2
00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:09,608
Dr. Solomon.
3
00:00:09,610 --> 00:00:11,276
No, no.
Before you speak,
4
00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:12,677
There's something
I need you to know.
5
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,013
[clears throat]
6
00:00:14,015 --> 00:00:16,247
"We've only been sharing
This office 3 days,
7
00:00:16,249 --> 00:00:18,917
"And already
I have concerns.
8
00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:21,053
"What happened
Between us last night,
9
00:00:21,055 --> 00:00:23,955
"And by that,
I mean the kiss,
10
00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:26,892
Was, in hindsight,
Impetuous, rash..."
11
00:00:26,894 --> 00:00:27,959
And perfect.
12
00:00:27,961 --> 00:00:30,329
Oh, thank god.
I thought so, too.
13
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:33,465
Now I won't have to read
The rest of this crap.
14
00:00:37,337 --> 00:00:38,904
Now hold still.
15
00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:39,971
Oh, I can't hold still.
16
00:00:39,973 --> 00:00:41,573
You've got to hold still.
17
00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:43,641
I can't.
I'm so excited to be
Going out with jennifer.
18
00:00:43,643 --> 00:00:45,210
She's got me
All tangled up
19
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:47,245
In one big,
Doughy love pretzel.
20
00:00:47,247 --> 00:00:49,914
Dick...Sit down.
21
00:00:49,916 --> 00:00:52,150
I'd forgotten
What new love felt like.
22
00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:53,752
So it's love, huh?
23
00:00:53,754 --> 00:00:56,287
Oh, yes. She's brilliant,
She's kind,
24
00:00:56,289 --> 00:00:59,658
She has the most
Delightful giggle.
25
00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:01,492
Mary never giggles.
26
00:01:01,494 --> 00:01:04,896
Right. So was the breakup
With mary messy?
27
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:08,366
No, not at all.
I haven't done it.
28
00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:09,867
You haven't?
29
00:01:09,869 --> 00:01:12,237
Oh, no. Who needs
All that unpleasantness?
30
00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:14,306
Life is too short.
31
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:18,243
Dick, 2 ladies.
That could blow up
In your face.
32
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,244
What do you mean?
33
00:01:19,246 --> 00:01:22,113
As a man with an active
Fantasy life,
34
00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:24,916
I can respect what
You're going through,
But it can't work.
35
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,653
You've got to do right
By mary.
36
00:01:27,655 --> 00:01:31,256
You're probably right.
I've got it!
37
00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:35,861
I'll pick up jennifer,
Then I'll swing by the office
To break up with mary,
38
00:01:35,863 --> 00:01:37,929
But I won't kiss jennifer
Until afterwards.
39
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:39,964
Now you're talking
Like a man.
40
00:01:41,668 --> 00:01:44,035
I look absolutely
Precious.
41
00:02:05,092 --> 00:02:08,059
Captioning made possible by
Carsey-werner productions
42
00:02:08,061 --> 00:02:20,672
And the national
Broadcasting company
43
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,541
Here we are.
44
00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,877
Now, I just have to
Run up to the office
For a little errand.
45
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:27,078
Ok.
46
00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:28,313
You stay in the car,
And I'll try to be
Quick.
47
00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:32,517
Fear not. I'll be fine,
My dear darling dick.
48
00:02:32,519 --> 00:02:35,153
Wait a minute.
What's that
You did there?
49
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:38,557
A playful homage
To my good friend molière.
50
00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:40,592
Oh, I get it.
You're rhyming.
51
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:42,728
And you do it
With flair.
52
00:02:42,730 --> 00:02:45,597
Scientist and poet.
53
00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:47,565
How extraordinaire!
54
00:02:49,236 --> 00:02:53,639
Ok, ok. No rhyming
Till I get back.
55
00:02:57,477 --> 00:02:59,978
Nina, could you
Leave for a minute?
56
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,146
No.
57
00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:04,983
Mary, we have to talk.
58
00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:06,051
Ok.
59
00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:07,285
Now, I want you
To hear me out
60
00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:09,587
Before you start
Yelling at me
Or throwing things.
61
00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:11,122
I'm listening.
62
00:03:11,124 --> 00:03:15,360
Mary, I've been talking
To my good friend don,
63
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,395
And we think
That it's time
64
00:03:17,397 --> 00:03:21,200
That you and I started
Seeing other people.
65
00:03:21,202 --> 00:03:22,400
What?
66
00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:25,103
What with your busy schedule
These days,
67
00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:27,472
We barely get to see
Each other, anyway.
68
00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,174
Ah, here it is.
69
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:32,110
My career is
Getting in the way of
Our relationship again.
70
00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:34,946
Ok, fine, dick.
Go ahead.
71
00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:36,981
Well...
72
00:03:38,886 --> 00:03:42,821
Well, that was easier
Than I thought.
73
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:45,957
I mean, who am I
To stand in your way?
74
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,793
Go out into
Your world of options.
75
00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:50,529
Happy shopping.
76
00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:03,508
Dr. Albright, you know,
If you take the leash
Off a dog,
77
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:05,844
It will go
In the neighbors' yard.
78
00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:08,646
Nina...
79
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:18,389
All right,
Done in here.
80
00:04:18,391 --> 00:04:19,724
Hey, harry,
I'm done.
81
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:21,960
You can bring
The chair
Back in now.
82
00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:26,964
Harry? I'm done.
You can bring
The chair back in.
83
00:04:26,966 --> 00:04:29,067
I could.
84
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:32,404
What are you
Saying?
85
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:36,741
I'm saying that
I think that this chair
Should stay in the kitchen.
86
00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:39,143
Harry, that's
A living room chair.
87
00:04:39,145 --> 00:04:41,112
It's just
A living room chair
88
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:44,149
Because you've been told
It's a living room chair.
89
00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:46,418
Wait until dick hears
How you've been talking.
90
00:04:46,420 --> 00:04:48,520
Just try the chair.
91
00:04:55,429 --> 00:04:57,361
This is weird.
92
00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:01,866
Big, fluffy chair
In the kitchen.
93
00:05:01,868 --> 00:05:03,535
Am I right?
94
00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:05,437
This chair belongs here!
95
00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:07,238
This is madness!
96
00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:09,707
Is it?
97
00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:20,518
My god.
98
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:24,022
Feels like my eyes
Have been blown wide open.
99
00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:27,726
It's like
I've never seen
The kitchen before.
100
00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:32,897
I mean, never truly
Seen it.
101
00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:36,233
Why should we accept
The norms of decorating?
102
00:05:36,235 --> 00:05:40,706
Why should we
Be bound by society's
Draconian constrictions?
103
00:05:40,708 --> 00:05:43,474
Why can't I sit in
A big, fluffy chair
104
00:05:43,476 --> 00:05:46,477
While I scramble
Some eggs?
105
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:47,913
You can.
106
00:05:47,915 --> 00:05:49,881
And why can't the toaster
Be in the living room
107
00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:52,383
So I can make toast
While watching television?
108
00:05:52,385 --> 00:05:53,685
Oh, we can have
All of these things.
109
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,820
Our horizons
Are unlimited.
110
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:56,921
I'm a little
Scared.
111
00:05:56,923 --> 00:05:58,657
Oh, me, too, harry.
Me, too.
112
00:06:02,328 --> 00:06:05,096
Oh, dick,
You'll love this place.
113
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:07,031
Tofu dog?
114
00:06:08,068 --> 00:06:10,234
Wheatgrass soup?
115
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:12,236
Celery ham?
116
00:06:12,238 --> 00:06:15,339
This is very funny.
117
00:06:15,341 --> 00:06:19,177
Now, uh, where's
The real menu?
118
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:23,948
Dick, this is
A lacto-ovo-vegetarian
Restaurant.
119
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:27,219
I have a lot
Of allergies.
120
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:28,787
Are they bad?
121
00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:32,157
Well, if I eat
A peanut or a nut,
My face swells up,
122
00:06:32,159 --> 00:06:34,159
And my body
Explodes in hives.
123
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:37,396
Oh, that is so cute.
124
00:06:37,398 --> 00:06:40,231
Here's an odd bit
Of trivia for you.
125
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,332
A lot of people
Don't know
126
00:06:41,334 --> 00:06:43,334
That a peanut
Is not actually a nut.
127
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:44,502
It's a legume.
128
00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:46,604
Oh. And a lot of people
Don't know
129
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:49,073
That a walnut is not
Actually a peanut.
130
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,375
It is a walnut.
131
00:06:50,377 --> 00:06:53,611
[giggles]
132
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:56,548
You nut.
133
00:06:56,550 --> 00:07:00,751
You know, you remind me
Of my good friend
Geoffrey chaucer.
134
00:07:03,290 --> 00:07:05,756
Is he gay?
Because if he isn't,
135
00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:07,759
I don't want you
Hanging out with him.
136
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,728
Fear not, my dear dick.
You've no competition.
137
00:07:10,730 --> 00:07:14,299
Oh, how I crave you,
My academician.
138
00:07:14,301 --> 00:07:16,267
What say we skip dinner
And rush to dessert?
139
00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:19,337
Listen to you,
You impetuous flirt.
140
00:07:24,377 --> 00:07:28,346
How did we live
Before this?
141
00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:36,921
It's tough to think that
In thousands of years
Of human civilization,
142
00:07:36,923 --> 00:07:38,022
No one ever
Thought of this.
143
00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:42,326
It just took
Fresh eyes
To see it.
144
00:07:43,663 --> 00:07:45,530
You...
Aw...
145
00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:50,301
I'll go get 'em.
146
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:55,439
You know, it's nice to think
We'll be leavin' this planet
147
00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:58,243
Just a little better
Than when we found it.
148
00:07:58,245 --> 00:07:59,477
Yeah.
149
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,612
Guys, dick's home.
150
00:08:00,614 --> 00:08:02,580
Oh, gosh, he's gonna
Be so excited.
151
00:08:02,582 --> 00:08:05,683
[humming the theme
From love story]
152
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,799
Dick...
153
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:25,169
What do you think?
154
00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,138
I think I found
My soul mate.
155
00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:28,706
No. What do you
Think of this?
156
00:08:28,708 --> 00:08:31,976
This?
Oh, this is stupid.
157
00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:36,581
Blasphemer!
158
00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:39,383
No, no!
159
00:08:39,385 --> 00:08:41,318
It's not
His fault.
160
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:44,122
We're so
Cutting-edge,
161
00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:45,289
It just
Confuses him.
162
00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:46,724
People have to be
Eased into this.
163
00:08:46,726 --> 00:08:49,093
Cutting edge? You just
Moved the kitchen
Into the living room.
164
00:08:50,597 --> 00:08:52,630
[all groan]
165
00:08:54,434 --> 00:08:57,669
We haven't made
Any improvements at all.
166
00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,938
This is just
2 less-good versions
167
00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:01,806
Of the same old room.
168
00:09:01,808 --> 00:09:04,542
Oh, god, we're idiots.
Let's move it all back.
169
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,211
Not so fast.
170
00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:11,349
What if there
Was a room
171
00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:14,251
That combined
The comfort and leisure
Of the living room
172
00:09:14,253 --> 00:09:17,221
With the food-making
Capabilities...
173
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,291
Of the kitchen?
174
00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:24,295
Even I don't believe
In that xanadu.
175
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:26,865
Hold on a second.
176
00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:29,968
That's a room I'd like
To hear more about.
177
00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,146
Dr. Ravelli.
178
00:09:41,148 --> 00:09:42,213
Dr. Solomon.
179
00:09:44,317 --> 00:09:47,485
A beautiful day today,
Is it not?
180
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:52,323
I had a nice walk
From the parking lot.
181
00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:57,428
I noticed you had
A nice shady spot.
182
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,264
It's a handicapped space.
183
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:02,199
I hope I'm not caught.
184
00:10:02,201 --> 00:10:05,336
I'm feeling a feeling
I thought I'd forgot.
185
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:06,403
Is it me,
186
00:10:06,405 --> 00:10:09,173
Or is this room
Incredibly hot?
187
00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:10,374
Nina: ahem.
188
00:10:10,376 --> 00:10:14,012
Methinks we'd best
Get back to work.
189
00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:17,549
Youthinks? Mmm,
That's very street.
190
00:10:17,551 --> 00:10:21,219
Street? Circa 1638.
191
00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:24,456
That's so funny.
192
00:10:24,458 --> 00:10:25,724
I'm gonna go
Write it down.
193
00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:27,091
Gosh,
She's annoying.
194
00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:28,993
How can you say that?
You barely know her.
195
00:10:28,995 --> 00:10:30,561
Do you?
196
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:31,696
I don't need to know her.
I love her.
197
00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:33,531
Are you talking
About me?
198
00:10:33,533 --> 00:10:34,833
Oh, yes.
199
00:10:34,835 --> 00:10:36,301
My ears are burning.
200
00:10:36,303 --> 00:10:38,669
Let me put them out
With my tongue.
201
00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:42,139
[giggles]
202
00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:45,176
Dick, I was wondering
If I could--oh, excuse me.
203
00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:47,845
Excuse me!
204
00:10:50,884 --> 00:10:52,617
Dick, what's going on?
205
00:10:52,619 --> 00:10:55,085
Mary, what's the big
Humpty-doo?
206
00:10:55,087 --> 00:10:57,555
You and I agreed
To see other people.
207
00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:59,990
Well, I never thought
You'd--
208
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:01,659
I mean, look at this.
209
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,061
I must say,
This is awkward.
210
00:11:04,063 --> 00:11:05,362
I had no idea
You two had a history.
211
00:11:05,364 --> 00:11:06,630
Well, we did!
212
00:11:06,632 --> 00:11:08,933
What say I take a walk?
213
00:11:10,203 --> 00:11:13,171
Dick, I can't believe
You'd do this.
214
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:16,807
Do what? Find somebody
Who has time for me?
Who's devoted to me?
215
00:11:16,809 --> 00:11:19,177
Birds gotta fly, mary.
216
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,312
Fish gotta swim.
217
00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:24,648
Camel's gotta carry water
Over long expanses of desert.
218
00:11:24,650 --> 00:11:27,051
You know what I'm saying.
219
00:11:27,053 --> 00:11:28,452
Well, tell me this.
220
00:11:28,454 --> 00:11:30,588
What does a rat do?
221
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:32,790
Because I'm looking at one
Right now.
222
00:11:32,792 --> 00:11:35,592
Where? Aah! Aah!
223
00:11:35,594 --> 00:11:38,429
Oh, you mean me.
224
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,201
So this is it?
225
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:45,002
The end of us?
226
00:11:45,004 --> 00:11:47,237
Are you happy, dick?
227
00:11:47,239 --> 00:11:48,239
I am.
228
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,607
Ohh!
229
00:11:50,910 --> 00:11:56,080
Well, you asked!
230
00:11:57,850 --> 00:12:00,551
If I'd known that
You and mary were an item...
231
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:01,853
were an item.
232
00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:03,454
Past tense.
It's over.
233
00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:06,224
Mary and I
Had some good times.
234
00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:09,960
Actually, we had--
Wow, 2 years together.
235
00:12:09,962 --> 00:12:11,729
And when did you know
It was over?
236
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,632
Tuesday,
Around lunchtime.
237
00:12:14,634 --> 00:12:17,769
Well, 2 years
Is pretty good.
238
00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:20,137
My longest relationship
Was a month and a half.
239
00:12:20,139 --> 00:12:21,472
A month and a half?
240
00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:23,374
Well, maybe
Not that long.
241
00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:24,441
[giggles]
242
00:12:24,443 --> 00:12:26,511
I'll have
The joy of soy.
243
00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:28,812
deux.
244
00:12:28,814 --> 00:12:31,282
You really love
That joy of soy.
245
00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:33,718
It's one of the only
Protein sources I'm allowed.
246
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,620
Oh. Ever?
247
00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:38,923
Uh...Kinda.
248
00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:41,759
I'm allergic
To nuts and peanuts.
249
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:44,829
A lot of people
Don't know that a peanut
Is not actually a nut...
250
00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,230
It's a legume.
It's a legume.
251
00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:47,832
Yes, you mentioned
That before.
252
00:12:47,834 --> 00:12:51,068
Oh, dick, pray tell,
Have I become a bore?
253
00:12:51,070 --> 00:12:54,438
I find you delightful.
Now please tell me more.
254
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:58,308
Ooh, ohh, this smells--
255
00:12:58,310 --> 00:13:00,912
Mmm. This smells--
256
00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:04,315
This has no smell.
257
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:05,916
No.
258
00:13:05,918 --> 00:13:07,985
It's so good for you.
259
00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:09,654
So, jennifer,
260
00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:12,056
Tell me a little bit
About...You.
261
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:16,794
Well, I love to read books.
I could read molière all day.
262
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:18,863
Yes, I know that.
But beyond that.
263
00:13:18,865 --> 00:13:21,698
Tell me all about
Jennifer ravelli.
264
00:13:25,372 --> 00:13:27,272
I had a bird once.
265
00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:29,273
A bird. Oh, good.
266
00:13:29,275 --> 00:13:30,975
Yes, tell me
About your bird.
267
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:34,411
His name was molière.
268
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:39,617
You have a little tofu
On your lip.
269
00:13:39,619 --> 00:13:42,353
This smoothie is delicious.
Please, have a sip.
270
00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:44,622
Ahh. Thank you,
But no.
271
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,290
Just, please,
Go like this.
272
00:13:46,292 --> 00:13:48,659
I've got an idea.
How about we kiss?
273
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:51,596
Ok, time-out. You're
Missing my point.
274
00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:53,397
Finish your food,
And we'll blow this joint.
275
00:13:53,399 --> 00:13:56,167
Just listen to me!
You have tofu
On your lip.
276
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,536
It's been there
For what seems like
An eternity.
277
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:01,805
Now please just flick it
The hell off your face!
278
00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:21,259
Thank you.
That's better.
Now we can embrace.
279
00:14:30,202 --> 00:14:32,637
I like
"Living kitchen."
280
00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:34,338
I prefer "Kitchen room."
281
00:14:34,340 --> 00:14:36,374
Klivingtchen.
282
00:14:38,445 --> 00:14:41,346
That's what they'll
Call it in germany.
283
00:14:41,348 --> 00:14:43,714
Maybe we don't
Even need to name it.
284
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,484
Look, either we name it,
Or the media will.
285
00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:49,086
Then it's settled.
286
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:50,988
Klivingtchen.
287
00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:53,991
Klivingtchen.
288
00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:57,595
Hello, dick.
Do you like?
289
00:14:57,597 --> 00:14:59,664
Oh, what's not
To like?
290
00:14:59,666 --> 00:15:01,933
No barriers.
No distance.
291
00:15:01,935 --> 00:15:04,001
It's kind of close.
292
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:08,873
We'll be like--
Like siamese twins
Connected at the head.
293
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:11,442
Or we could just
Move the desks back.
294
00:15:11,444 --> 00:15:14,912
I could look at you
All day long.
295
00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:18,349
I can see every single
Pore on your face.
296
00:15:19,352 --> 00:15:21,318
You nut.
297
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:26,824
[giggling]
298
00:15:31,865 --> 00:15:34,865
[giggling]
299
00:15:34,867 --> 00:15:38,002
Oh, dick, this bit of tartuffe is simply delicious.
300
00:15:38,004 --> 00:15:39,070
Let me read it to you.
301
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:40,438
Uh, no, thanks.
I'm good.
302
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,572
I'll see you tonight.
303
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:42,874
Yep!
304
00:15:43,877 --> 00:15:44,976
Oh, mary.
305
00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:45,977
Hello, dick.
306
00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,311
Hello.
307
00:15:49,983 --> 00:15:51,916
[jennifer
Laughs loudly]
308
00:15:54,754 --> 00:15:56,854
[door opens]
309
00:15:56,856 --> 00:16:00,291
Hey, dr. Albright.
How are you doin'?
310
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,225
I'm busy.
311
00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:02,960
Oh, ok.
312
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,228
'cause I'm the dean.
313
00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:05,896
I'm working. I work.
314
00:16:05,898 --> 00:16:08,399
To the exclusion
Of everything else, I work.
315
00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:09,767
Are you ok?
316
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:12,269
I'm thrilled.
I'm at my job.
317
00:16:12,271 --> 00:16:14,138
No time
For a relationship.
318
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:17,474
I'm the big dean.
Career lady.
319
00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:20,745
Come on. That doesn't
Give him the right
To do what he did.
320
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:22,113
No, it doesn't.
321
00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:27,551
He's an immature,
Loathsome, stupid man!
322
00:16:27,553 --> 00:16:30,354
Oh, god, I miss him.
323
00:16:30,356 --> 00:16:33,958
Come on, let's go out,
Get drunk, make fun of him!
324
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:38,062
I don't feel like
Going out.
325
00:16:38,064 --> 00:16:39,230
Ok.
326
00:16:39,232 --> 00:16:41,399
Sit down.
327
00:16:47,406 --> 00:16:48,872
Duck.
328
00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:53,544
Hey, harry, we're ready
For that fried chicken.
329
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,246
Incoming!
330
00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:58,048
Tommy: duck!
331
00:17:00,186 --> 00:17:03,421
You know,
Mary used to make
Excellent fried chicken.
332
00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:04,421
Yeah, whatever. Duck!
333
00:17:06,292 --> 00:17:10,027
Oh, my god, you guys.
It's sha na na.
334
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,229
Oh, that bowser's
A stitch.
335
00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:13,397
Harry, get back to work!
336
00:17:13,399 --> 00:17:15,899
Incoming!
337
00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:21,071
Jennifer: hello!
338
00:17:21,073 --> 00:17:22,540
Oh, she's here.
339
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:23,540
c'est moi.
340
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:25,643
Jennifer, this is
Harry, tommy,
341
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:26,978
Don and sally.
342
00:17:26,980 --> 00:17:29,680
Why, there's so many,
I'll keep a tally.
343
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:32,984
Oh, you brought wine.
344
00:17:32,986 --> 00:17:34,952
A small token.
The pleasure's all mine.
345
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:37,054
Nice gift.
Great rhyme.
346
00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:38,188
I love this room.
347
00:17:38,190 --> 00:17:39,690
You like
The klivingtchen?
348
00:17:39,692 --> 00:17:40,691
Klivingtchen?
349
00:17:40,693 --> 00:17:43,227
Living kitchen.
350
00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:45,196
I think
It's bitchin'.
351
00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,867
And you're
Subverting space.
352
00:17:49,869 --> 00:17:51,802
Oh, you noticed. Duck!
353
00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:55,172
Methinks you've
Done something
Really special here.
354
00:17:55,174 --> 00:17:59,343
Well, methinks you're not
So bad yourself. Incoming!
355
00:17:59,345 --> 00:18:01,945
One thing that I can
Obviously see
356
00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:05,015
Is you've been saying
Nice things about me.
357
00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:08,619
Yes. Yes,
I suppose I have.
358
00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:10,454
Oh, hey, jennifer,
You like fried chicken?
359
00:18:10,456 --> 00:18:11,955
Ooh, I can't
Eat chicken.
360
00:18:11,957 --> 00:18:12,956
Tommy: duck!
361
00:18:12,958 --> 00:18:14,358
Nor duck.
362
00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:16,293
But I did bring along
Some bok choy.
Could you toss that in?
363
00:18:16,295 --> 00:18:17,595
Bok choy. Sure.
364
00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:18,696
That's not peanut oil,
Is it?
365
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:20,264
Oh, no, hon.
It's lard.
366
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,999
Good. Because
I am allergic
367
00:18:22,001 --> 00:18:23,767
To peanuts and nuts.
368
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:28,706
You now, a lot of people
Don't know that a peanut
Isn't actually a nut.
369
00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:32,343
No?
370
00:18:32,345 --> 00:18:33,811
What is it, then?
371
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:37,481
A legume.
372
00:18:37,483 --> 00:18:38,783
I didn't know that.
373
00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:40,951
We'll have to
Discuss this
Over dinner.
374
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,353
With food
This good,
375
00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:44,622
I won't get
Much thinner.
376
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,123
Bravo! Bravo!
377
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:48,725
You don't have to rhyme
If you don't want to.
378
00:18:48,727 --> 00:18:51,061
Who's ready for
Fried chicken
And grapes?
379
00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:55,366
And remember--
Don't wipe your hands
On the drapes.
380
00:18:55,368 --> 00:18:57,501
Yes! Ha ha ha.
381
00:18:57,503 --> 00:19:00,738
Instead of us rhyming,
Let's try some free verse.
382
00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:03,974
To me, that's a game
Which is much more
Worse.
383
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:05,843
Encore!
[whistles]
384
00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:06,911
Encore!
385
00:19:09,949 --> 00:19:11,716
Congratulations,
Dick.
386
00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:14,218
You got yourself
A hell of a rhymer.
387
00:19:14,220 --> 00:19:16,220
Ohh...
388
00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:18,922
I've tried to rhyme,
You know.
389
00:19:18,924 --> 00:19:21,392
There was a dog
Who sat on a log.
390
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:24,061
His name was...Rog?
391
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:26,230
That sort of thing.
392
00:19:26,232 --> 00:19:28,499
Hold on to her, dick.
She's one of a kind.
393
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:31,669
So you like the rhyming, eh?
You like the rhyming?
394
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,737
Yeah.
395
00:19:32,739 --> 00:19:34,672
And what if the rhyming
Were never to stop?
396
00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:37,574
On, on, and on
Till your head doth pop.
397
00:19:37,576 --> 00:19:40,277
Oh, look! A book!
A book on schnook!
398
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:42,913
What kind of crook
Took my schnook nook book?
399
00:19:42,915 --> 00:19:45,883
Perchance, methinks, thee,
Hither, yon, thou.
400
00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:49,186
I'm think I'm gonna have
A freakin' cow!
401
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:52,456
You sure
Seem to hate her.
Sounds really tough.
402
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:56,026
Hate's a strong word, don,
But not strong enough.
403
00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:57,661
I get your point.
404
00:19:57,663 --> 00:19:58,963
I don't know what happened.
405
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:01,933
I fell for jennifer
The same way I fell for mary.
406
00:20:01,935 --> 00:20:04,101
How could it
Have gone away so fast?
407
00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,804
It was a crush.
The hots.
408
00:20:06,806 --> 00:20:08,238
You were jonesin'.
409
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:10,007
It was just
An infatuation.
410
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,942
It felt just like
The real thing.
411
00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:14,345
And now I've tossed
Mary aside.
412
00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:15,812
She'll never
Take me back.
413
00:20:15,814 --> 00:20:17,214
You don't
Know that, dick.
414
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:18,916
She can be
Pretty forgiving.
415
00:20:18,918 --> 00:20:20,784
You think so?
416
00:20:20,786 --> 00:20:25,922
Mary: dick solomon,
Show your stinkin' face!
417
00:20:25,924 --> 00:20:28,058
There's
Your opening.
418
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:31,094
Mary! You're here!
419
00:20:31,096 --> 00:20:32,663
Yes, I'm here.
420
00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,532
Just long enough
To tell you
421
00:20:34,534 --> 00:20:37,902
What an ass you are.
422
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,472
There. I think I'm done.
423
00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:43,140
No, no, mary. Wait.
424
00:20:43,142 --> 00:20:45,309
I've been doing
A lot of thinking.
425
00:20:45,311 --> 00:20:48,078
I've been doing
A lot of thinking, too.
426
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,549
About what an ass you are!
427
00:20:51,551 --> 00:20:54,885
I work late
A couple of nights,
428
00:20:54,887 --> 00:20:57,688
And you seize
The opportunity
429
00:20:57,690 --> 00:21:01,158
To chase the first skirt
That comes along.
430
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,926
Oh, no. But, mary,
I've been thinking--
431
00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:04,562
Oh, don't talk to me again.
432
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:07,797
Ever, ever, never ever.
433
00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:14,205
That's not
A very good rhyme.
434
00:21:14,207 --> 00:21:16,273
Mary: ass!
435
00:21:18,211 --> 00:21:21,845
Tommy: so, jennifer,
Tell us again about that
Whole peanut thing.
436
00:21:21,847 --> 00:21:22,846
Sure, tommy.
437
00:21:22,848 --> 00:21:24,548
Harry: yeah,
And make it rhyme.
438
00:21:24,550 --> 00:21:28,685
Sure. The peanut, you see,
May look like a nut...
439
00:21:28,687 --> 00:21:32,256
Officer don: but it's
Really a legume...
Just ask king tut!
440
00:21:32,258 --> 00:21:33,657
I did it!
441
00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:42,733
The klivingtchen
Was the stupidest idea
We ever had.
442
00:21:42,735 --> 00:21:45,469
Yep, I know.
What were we thinking?
443
00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:50,440
Now, this...This makes
Perfect sense.
444
00:21:54,180 --> 00:21:56,080
I'm a little hungry.
445
00:21:56,082 --> 00:21:58,082
Incoming!
446
00:21:58,084 --> 00:21:59,883
Captioning made possible by
Carsey-werner productions and
The national broadcasting
Company
447
00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:01,952
Captioning performed by
The national captioning
Institute, inc.
448
00:22:01,954 --> 00:22:06,223
Public performance of captions
Prohibited without permission of
National captioning institute
33042
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