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1
00:01:23,984 --> 00:01:25,183
Come on, Tony.
2
00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:27,018
You just have to accept the fact
3
00:01:27,054 --> 00:01:28,921
that latka has
multiple personalities.
4
00:01:28,956 --> 00:01:30,489
Vic Ferrari is one of them.
5
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:31,690
But it's not fair.
6
00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:33,459
I mean,
latka works here all year,
7
00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:34,960
and then Vic takes his vacation.
8
00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:36,628
Well, look at it this way, Tony.
9
00:01:36,664 --> 00:01:38,997
If latka takes a vacation,
it's a dull vacation,
10
00:01:39,032 --> 00:01:43,001
but if Vic takes it...
11
00:01:43,036 --> 00:01:45,036
Deal 'em.
12
00:01:55,048 --> 00:01:56,315
Hey, guys.
13
00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:57,683
Hey. Hi. Hey.
14
00:01:57,718 --> 00:02:02,187
Hey, I know you're gonna
break some hearts today.
15
00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:04,223
Hey, uh... hey, Vic, uh,
16
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:05,824
you all set on your vacation?
17
00:02:05,859 --> 00:02:09,594
Well, I found an outrageous
condo in sugarloaf.
18
00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:13,198
Four bedrooms, fireplace.
19
00:02:13,234 --> 00:02:14,065
A hot tub?
20
00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:16,768
Well,
it will be when I get into it.
21
00:02:18,839 --> 00:02:20,238
I'm sorry.
22
00:02:20,274 --> 00:02:23,442
I couldn't resist.
23
00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:28,913
I couldn't resist.
24
00:02:28,949 --> 00:02:30,660
Hey, uh, Vic, do you know,
this sounds pretty expensive.
25
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:31,895
Where are you gonna
get the money?
26
00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,386
Well, I'm not gonna
pay for it all myself.
27
00:02:34,421 --> 00:02:36,021
I'm gonna have roomies.
28
00:02:36,056 --> 00:02:38,256
I have to find four
guys by Tuesday.
29
00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:39,557
You know, it's very hard
30
00:02:39,592 --> 00:02:41,393
to find the right
kind of people.
31
00:02:41,428 --> 00:02:43,928
Why, are-are you
looking for good skiers?
32
00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:46,798
Oh, Elaine, you're so naive.
33
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,066
Give me a hug.
34
00:02:48,102 --> 00:02:49,634
Uh, no, thank you.
35
00:02:51,805 --> 00:02:53,605
Anyway,
let-let me tell you the plan.
36
00:02:53,640 --> 00:02:54,773
It's always good
37
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:56,875
to have one guy
who likes to cook.
38
00:02:56,910 --> 00:02:59,244
I mean, uh, that way,
you get your meals,
39
00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:00,812
and you also get a reputation
40
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:02,848
for breaking down the
male/female stereotypes.
41
00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:04,816
Also, it's good to have a guy
42
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:07,419
who looks good in a turtleneck
and plays the guitar.
43
00:03:07,454 --> 00:03:09,221
Namely, moi.
44
00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:13,425
Then it's always good
to have a loser along.
45
00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:15,126
That way,
when you bring him along,
46
00:03:15,162 --> 00:03:16,562
everyone thinks
you're sensitive.
47
00:03:16,597 --> 00:03:18,430
Then you always...
48
00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:21,299
Of course, you need some
Austrian guy named Nicky.
49
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:24,336
Don't ask me why,
but somehow it works.
50
00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:30,675
You know...
51
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:35,780
That Vic may have charm,
52
00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:37,816
he may have looks,
53
00:03:37,851 --> 00:03:39,718
and he may have charisma,
54
00:03:39,753 --> 00:03:42,587
but there's one thing
he'll never have.
55
00:03:42,622 --> 00:03:45,122
This.
56
00:03:52,432 --> 00:03:56,201
Charisma does not have
jelly in the middle.
57
00:04:00,340 --> 00:04:01,640
Play.
58
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:12,117
Well, why are you
in such a good mood?
59
00:04:12,152 --> 00:04:14,853
Well, if you really
want to hear about it.
60
00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:17,656
I had a big fight with
my mother last night,
61
00:04:17,691 --> 00:04:19,491
and I really let her have it.
62
00:04:19,526 --> 00:04:21,827
She didn't know what hit her.
63
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:24,029
Well, congratulations, Louie!
64
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,897
You did a job on your mother.
65
00:04:25,933 --> 00:04:27,866
Now it's Miller time.
66
00:04:30,204 --> 00:04:31,403
All right, all right.
67
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:33,338
First of all, let me give you
68
00:04:33,373 --> 00:04:34,739
a little background on this.
69
00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:38,443
You see... my mom belongs
70
00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:42,013
to this club called
life begins at 70.
71
00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:45,750
All right,
the whole club consists
72
00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,818
of three women, two men,
73
00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:51,989
and somebody so shriveled
up, it's anybody's guess.
74
00:04:52,025 --> 00:04:55,894
Louie,
has it ever occurred to you
75
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:58,262
that old people have a dignity
76
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,832
and a wisdom and a beauty
77
00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:02,934
that you will never
appreciate or approach,
78
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:04,902
no matter what age you get to?
79
00:05:04,938 --> 00:05:06,838
Well, it may look like that to
you, reiger,
80
00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:08,585
because you're a little
closer to the bucket.
81
00:05:08,609 --> 00:05:10,341
Bah!
82
00:05:10,376 --> 00:05:12,243
All right, all right, so anyway,
83
00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:13,878
in this little club of ma's,
84
00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:15,847
they get together
every once in a while
85
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,883
to have a little fun, right?
86
00:05:18,918 --> 00:05:21,320
They have, uh, guest speakers.
87
00:05:21,355 --> 00:05:22,621
This one time,
88
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:25,423
they had a guy come
in who found a rock,
89
00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:27,926
and he talked about it
for an hour and a half.
90
00:05:27,961 --> 00:05:30,328
A couple of weeks ago,
91
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:36,335
they had this old bird come
in and show travel slides.
92
00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:38,837
After the excitement died down,
93
00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:41,840
the old guy with
the slides asked ma
94
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:43,408
if he could take her home.
95
00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:45,243
Little shuffle.
You know what I mean?
96
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:48,079
So, anyway, that day,
97
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:53,050
I work a double shift...
16 hours.
98
00:05:53,086 --> 00:05:55,152
I mean, I'm sweaty,
99
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,122
I'm tired, I smell like a goat.
100
00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:01,393
All I want to do is go home,
101
00:06:01,428 --> 00:06:04,362
hose myself down and
put on the feedbag.
102
00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:06,631
So, I peek into the living room.
103
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:08,800
What do I see?
104
00:06:08,835 --> 00:06:10,802
There's ma
105
00:06:10,837 --> 00:06:13,938
sitting on the...
on the sofa with this guy.
106
00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:16,808
They're staring out
into space like this.
107
00:06:16,843 --> 00:06:18,309
I thought they were dead.
108
00:06:21,181 --> 00:06:24,082
It turns out, they're smitten.
109
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,889
So anyway...
110
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:35,426
Hey, schizo?
111
00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:40,031
The next thing you know,
she's talking about marriage.
112
00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:41,933
Marriage? Check, please.
113
00:06:54,348 --> 00:06:56,848
Come on, big fella.
114
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,154
All right,
to make a long story short,
115
00:07:03,189 --> 00:07:04,889
she's talking about marriage.
116
00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:06,458
She wants to marry the guy.
117
00:07:06,493 --> 00:07:08,627
I tell her she's nuts,
118
00:07:08,662 --> 00:07:10,996
and then she comes back
with all these answers
119
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:12,830
about wanting to share her life
120
00:07:12,866 --> 00:07:15,167
and not having many years left.
121
00:07:15,202 --> 00:07:18,169
So then,
I come in with my topper.
122
00:07:18,205 --> 00:07:25,176
I tell her if she marries this
guy, I'm no longer her son.
123
00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:26,344
Wah!
124
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:30,615
Oh, Louie, how could you?
125
00:07:30,650 --> 00:07:33,384
How could you do this
to your own mother?
126
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:35,720
You haven't heard the
worst, nardo.
127
00:07:37,291 --> 00:07:43,194
The guy she wants to marry...
is Japanese!
128
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:47,332
So?
129
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:51,002
My little old Italian
mother is engaged
130
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,672
to itsumi fujimoto.
131
00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:55,907
Huh?
132
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:58,510
And he's planning to
take her to Japan.
133
00:07:58,545 --> 00:08:01,479
So you made her give him
up, huh?
134
00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:04,582
And just spoiled her
last chance at happiness.
135
00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:06,751
You are really a worm!
136
00:08:06,787 --> 00:08:08,486
Ugh.
137
00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,454
I bet it broke her little heart.
138
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,657
She'll get over it.
139
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:16,427
She cried a little bit,
put a minor curse on me...
140
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:20,031
Louie? Hey, Louie,
141
00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:21,566
I want to talk to you.
142
00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:27,071
Oh. Uh, hey, everybody, hold it.
143
00:08:27,106 --> 00:08:29,541
Uh, this is my mother.
144
00:08:29,576 --> 00:08:31,042
I want everybody
145
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:33,811
to treat her with
enormous respect
146
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,613
and excellent manners.
147
00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:39,851
If it wasn't for her,
I wouldn't be here.
148
00:08:39,886 --> 00:08:42,053
Hey,
you're forgetting your father
149
00:08:42,088 --> 00:08:44,022
and a cheap bottle of wine?
150
00:08:46,994 --> 00:08:50,695
Oh, Mrs. De palma,
it is such a pleasure to meet you.
151
00:08:50,730 --> 00:08:52,263
Who are you?
152
00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:54,098
Oh. Um, I'm Elaine nardo.
153
00:08:54,133 --> 00:08:55,400
Oh, Louie's girl.
154
00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:00,371
Alex.
155
00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:02,207
Yeah, uh, hi, Mrs. De palma.
156
00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:03,708
I'm Alex reiger.
157
00:09:03,743 --> 00:09:07,378
Oh, you're the Jewish fella
that Louie's always helping out.
158
00:09:09,415 --> 00:09:10,548
I can't tell you
159
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,917
how much we love your son, Mrs.
De palma.
160
00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:14,251
I really can't tell you.
161
00:09:14,287 --> 00:09:16,354
Uh, Tony, uh, you're next.
162
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,222
I'm Tony banta, Mrs. De palma.
163
00:09:18,257 --> 00:09:19,157
Oh.
164
00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:23,394
I can't believe what
Louie says about you.
165
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:26,597
What city are we in?
166
00:09:30,369 --> 00:09:32,770
Is... is this a trick question?
167
00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:35,240
Well, I'll be darned.
168
00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:38,176
Oh. Hey, Mrs. De palma,
169
00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,878
I've been waiting to meet you.
170
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:43,515
Um...
171
00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:44,860
Oh... italiano?
172
00:09:44,884 --> 00:09:46,217
Sì, sì. Oh.
173
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,225
Oh.
174
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,027
Ma, down here.
175
00:09:57,063 --> 00:09:58,195
Hey, Tony,
176
00:09:58,231 --> 00:09:59,530
what-what... what did she say?
177
00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:02,032
Well, my Italian's a little
rusty, Alex, but she said...
178
00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:05,203
I think she said, uh,
her son's acting like a jackass.
179
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:07,972
Or... or else he's
acting like an asparagus?
180
00:10:09,675 --> 00:10:11,709
No, it's probably jackass.
181
00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:13,945
Well, you are the expert.
182
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:16,981
New cabbie?
183
00:10:21,755 --> 00:10:24,055
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no.
184
00:10:24,090 --> 00:10:26,357
This is Louie's mother, Mrs.
De palma.
185
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:28,359
Oh.
186
00:10:29,796 --> 00:10:34,365
Your son is one of the
finest human beings
187
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,534
I've ever known in my life.
188
00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:45,810
And you let him drive a cab?
189
00:10:49,015 --> 00:10:52,150
Look, if this has anything to do
190
00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:54,152
with itsumi fujimoto...
191
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:56,988
Louie,
I still want to marry him.
192
00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,757
I thought that was settled.
193
00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:00,959
You-you've got no reason
to marry that man.
194
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,760
Companionship.
195
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:05,763
Companionship. Companionship.
196
00:11:05,799 --> 00:11:08,732
Is that all you old
people ever think about?
197
00:11:12,071 --> 00:11:14,571
Louie...
198
00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:16,908
Will you talk to him?
199
00:11:16,943 --> 00:11:18,876
Will you meet him?
200
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:20,611
Why should I do that?
201
00:11:20,647 --> 00:11:22,180
You meet him,
202
00:11:22,215 --> 00:11:25,116
and if you don't like
him, I won't marry him.
203
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,887
You promise?
204
00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:30,521
I promise.
205
00:11:31,625 --> 00:11:34,092
Okay.
206
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:35,727
Will you sit with him?
207
00:11:35,762 --> 00:11:37,362
Sure.
208
00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:38,697
Will you talk to him?
209
00:11:38,732 --> 00:11:40,065
Sure.
210
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:41,598
Will you be nice to him?
211
00:11:41,635 --> 00:11:43,535
Ma!
212
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:46,504
I had to go for it.
213
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:08,125
Hello, my dear.
214
00:12:10,997 --> 00:12:13,631
I take it this is Mr. Fujimoto.
215
00:12:13,667 --> 00:12:17,001
No, this always
happens to me in bars.
216
00:12:20,674 --> 00:12:22,974
I love your sense of humor.
217
00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:27,678
Speaking of which,
this is my son, Louie.
218
00:12:27,714 --> 00:12:30,347
How do you do, Mr. De palma?
219
00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:33,350
Up, up.
220
00:12:33,386 --> 00:12:35,085
Up.
221
00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:36,988
Bow, bow.
222
00:12:40,527 --> 00:12:42,326
All right,
you want to talk to me?
223
00:12:42,361 --> 00:12:43,828
Let's go over here and talk.
224
00:12:43,863 --> 00:12:45,196
Very well.
225
00:12:45,232 --> 00:12:48,233
Excuse us, Gabriella.
226
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,602
By the way,
you look lovely today.
227
00:12:50,637 --> 00:12:51,770
Thank you.
228
00:12:51,805 --> 00:12:54,239
Come on,
people are trying to eat in here.
229
00:12:56,843 --> 00:12:59,144
I'll just sit here and smoke.
230
00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:02,380
Smoke your brains
out, crazy lady.
231
00:13:06,052 --> 00:13:08,619
Louie,
I understand from your mother
232
00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:10,588
that you are opposed
233
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,991
to the idea of our
getting married.
234
00:13:13,026 --> 00:13:14,959
All right,
now let's get to the point here.
235
00:13:14,995 --> 00:13:18,596
I got a question for you.
236
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:21,232
Have you ever known
another woman?
237
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:25,870
Of course, I am 83 years old.
238
00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:28,873
Who hasn't known
another woman at my age?
239
00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:31,142
Well, all right,
don't chew my head off here.
240
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:35,479
Ma, you can't marry
this old geezer.
241
00:13:35,515 --> 00:13:38,516
He's pillowed half the orient.
242
00:13:41,921 --> 00:13:43,688
Louie, I'm gonna marry him.
243
00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:46,658
You said if I don't like
him, you won't marry him.
244
00:13:46,693 --> 00:13:48,659
I lied.
245
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:55,833
Look, I told you this before
and I'm gonna tell you again,
246
00:13:55,869 --> 00:14:00,337
if you marry this guy,
i'm not coming home tonight
247
00:14:00,373 --> 00:14:04,776
and I'll never set foot
in that apartment again.
248
00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:07,612
And I'll no longer be your son.
249
00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:11,715
I'm sorry you feel that way.
250
00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,851
Let's go, itsu.
251
00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:24,228
Sayonara, Louie.
252
00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:36,885
I can't believe
Louie's doing this,
253
00:14:36,909 --> 00:14:37,975
living in the garage.
254
00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:39,277
Hey, guys.
255
00:14:39,312 --> 00:14:41,245
Okay, hey, oh!
256
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:46,618
Boss man isn't up yet, huh?
257
00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:47,952
No, uh, Vic, he's not.
258
00:14:47,987 --> 00:14:49,620
Tell him that I left early
259
00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:51,122
to beat the weekend traffic.
260
00:14:51,157 --> 00:14:53,157
You found all those
guys for the condo?
261
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:56,160
Oh, yeah, yeah, hey,
congratulate me, men.
262
00:14:56,196 --> 00:14:58,729
The team is assembled
and we're on our way
263
00:14:58,764 --> 00:15:02,266
to a holiday of hormones.
264
00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:05,135
Okay, pray for powder, soldiers.
265
00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:46,610
As my guide,
and I watch from the bushes,
266
00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:50,914
we are amazed...
By the astounding
267
00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:52,883
similarities to a human being.
268
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:59,690
What are you bozos doing here?
269
00:15:59,725 --> 00:16:01,192
What are you all dressed up for?
270
00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:03,528
We're on our way to your
mother's wedding, Louie.
271
00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:07,131
Oh, is it today?
272
00:16:07,166 --> 00:16:08,799
Yeah.
273
00:16:08,835 --> 00:16:11,602
Well...
274
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:15,740
I'm afraid you made one
little mistake, reiger.
275
00:16:15,775 --> 00:16:18,776
I don't have a mother anymore.
276
00:16:18,812 --> 00:16:22,280
Hey, uh, he's walking his soap.
277
00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:29,854
Louie, Louie.
278
00:16:29,889 --> 00:16:31,622
Get out of here.
Louie, wait, Louie!
279
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,057
Go on. Louie, Louie.
280
00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:35,292
Wait a minute, Louie!
281
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:36,927
Look, Louie, I wouldn't
282
00:16:36,963 --> 00:16:39,397
be here except that I think
it might make a big difference
283
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,399
to your mother if you
showed up there today.
284
00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:43,768
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, go on.
285
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:47,337
Oh, come on, Louie, for once in your
life, don't be so... you.
286
00:16:49,709 --> 00:16:54,945
You think you know it all, huh?
287
00:16:54,980 --> 00:16:57,915
You think you got it all figured
out, don't you?
288
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:04,522
Well, let me tell you something.
289
00:17:04,557 --> 00:17:07,157
You get used to a way of life.
290
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:08,325
You don't pick it.
291
00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:13,898
Me and ma had a deal.
292
00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:15,232
We had an agreement.
293
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:18,569
It was unspoken,
there were no papers signed,
294
00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:20,872
but it was a deal just the same.
295
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:22,473
And now she's throwing it away.
296
00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:24,542
And let me tell you something
else, reiger.
297
00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:26,677
I would've never
done this to her.
298
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,045
Wait, are you telling me
299
00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:30,380
that you were never
gonna get married?
300
00:17:30,416 --> 00:17:33,483
Of course I'm gonna get married.
301
00:17:33,519 --> 00:17:35,452
But even if I did get married,
302
00:17:35,487 --> 00:17:38,655
I'd always have a place
in my home for her.
303
00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:40,857
I'd have given her a room.
304
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:44,295
Maybe even furnished it.
305
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:47,465
Even if my wife, fleurette,
didn't want me to.
306
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:48,766
Fleurette?
307
00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:51,034
Yeah, whatever her name will be.
308
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,336
Fleurette?
309
00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:54,439
Yeah,
I pulled it out of the air.
310
00:17:54,474 --> 00:17:56,574
You pull Jane or
Sally out of the air.
311
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:59,209
You don't pull fleurette
out of the air.
312
00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:00,845
You pull fleurette out of long,
313
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:03,714
hot sweaty nights of
total frustration.
314
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:06,083
All right, I'm a romantic.
315
00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:07,684
So sue me.
316
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:11,188
The point is that
ma is leaving me.
317
00:18:11,224 --> 00:18:16,326
She's busting us up and yet
I look like the bad guy.
318
00:18:17,830 --> 00:18:20,665
Everybody's sympathizing
with her 'cause she's got
319
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,667
the gray hair,
320
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:26,304
the little, little face
and that cute little walk.
321
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:32,976
And I'm the one who had his
life yanked out, reiger.
322
00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:38,483
That woman means everything to
me, reiger.
323
00:18:38,518 --> 00:18:40,651
She's my mama.
324
00:18:40,686 --> 00:18:43,987
And all the things
she did for me.
325
00:18:45,924 --> 00:18:51,695
She cooked my food,
cleaned my clothes,
326
00:18:51,730 --> 00:18:54,998
she clipped my toenails.
327
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:57,934
Clipped your toenails, Lou?
328
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,603
That woman clipped
your toenails,
329
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,438
and you're not gonna
go to the wedding?
330
00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:07,445
God,
when you put it like that...
331
00:19:11,117 --> 00:19:13,184
You're right,
reiger, I gotta go.
332
00:19:13,219 --> 00:19:15,219
Of course I gotta go.
Of course, Lou!
333
00:19:15,254 --> 00:19:16,353
Oh, but I don't know.
334
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:17,454
I'm not sure.
335
00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:19,323
It might be a mistake
the way I feel.
336
00:19:19,358 --> 00:19:21,325
I mean,
it might work on my guts.
337
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:24,095
You know, there's no telling
what I'd do when I get there.
338
00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:26,763
There's a nasty side to
me you've never seen.
339
00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:28,098
I've seen it.
340
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:30,501
Look, Lou, see,
you're not gonna do anything.
341
00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:32,447
I'm telling you,
you're not gonna do anything to ruin it.
342
00:19:32,471 --> 00:19:34,204
If you can't trust
yourself, trust me.
343
00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:39,610
You're sure?
I'm sure, Lou, I'm sure.
344
00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:41,979
You're right,
reiger, I'm gonna go.
345
00:19:42,015 --> 00:19:43,214
Good, Lou, good.
346
00:19:43,249 --> 00:19:45,015
You know something, reiger?
347
00:19:45,050 --> 00:19:45,882
What?
348
00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:46,951
I feel great!
349
00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:50,120
I feel like I got a
warm glow inside me.
350
00:19:50,155 --> 00:19:51,589
And you know why?
351
00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:52,757
Why, Lou, why?
352
00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:56,894
Because no matter what
happens at that wedding,
353
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:59,997
no matter what disgusting
and revolting thing
354
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:02,833
that I might do,
it's your fault.
355
00:20:17,283 --> 00:20:19,883
I think everything
is so beautiful.
356
00:20:19,918 --> 00:20:21,018
Yeah.
357
00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:22,719
This is a joke.
358
00:20:22,755 --> 00:20:23,755
Louie.
359
00:20:23,789 --> 00:20:26,823
Boss, you'll love it.
360
00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:30,194
It's a very moving ceremony.
361
00:20:30,230 --> 00:20:32,129
How do you know, iggy?
362
00:20:32,164 --> 00:20:36,801
I'm a student of the
world's religions.
363
00:20:36,836 --> 00:20:38,803
It figures.
364
00:20:38,838 --> 00:20:44,374
A shinto wedding is one of the
three best ways to get married.
365
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:50,147
The best weddings are
Polish for the dancing
366
00:20:50,182 --> 00:20:53,050
and shinto for the poetry.
367
00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:53,985
What's the third?
368
00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:57,388
Vegas.
369
00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:58,722
For the glitter.
370
00:20:58,758 --> 00:20:59,957
Oh.
371
00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:01,659
I can't take this. Louie!
372
00:21:01,694 --> 00:21:03,361
Louie, take it easy.
373
00:21:03,396 --> 00:21:05,363
This is a holy place.
374
00:21:06,499 --> 00:21:10,468
Who's that guy?
375
00:21:10,503 --> 00:21:12,703
This is the shinto priest
376
00:21:12,739 --> 00:21:14,671
and his attendants.
377
00:21:19,245 --> 00:21:21,445
He brought the whole family.
378
00:21:26,853 --> 00:21:28,419
Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie.
379
00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:32,556
Next comes the groom
and then the bride.
380
00:21:42,234 --> 00:21:44,201
Dad.
381
00:21:44,236 --> 00:21:46,003
This is ridiculous!
382
00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:47,905
My mother can't do this.
383
00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:49,172
She'll never adapt!
384
00:21:52,945 --> 00:21:54,278
Who's that?
385
00:21:56,082 --> 00:21:57,948
Oh, no!
386
00:22:01,921 --> 00:22:04,221
That's mom!
387
00:22:04,256 --> 00:22:07,525
She looks like a
scarecrow in a rice paddy.
388
00:22:11,464 --> 00:22:15,399
This is the purification rite.
389
00:22:15,434 --> 00:22:17,902
He's casting out the demons.
390
00:22:17,937 --> 00:22:19,703
Louie, you'd better
hang on to your seat.
391
00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:24,841
I'm glad you're having a good
time, nardo.
392
00:22:28,114 --> 00:22:31,114
This is the sacred norito.
393
00:22:31,150 --> 00:22:34,885
It's a message to
the divine power
394
00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:37,254
that a marriage is
about to take place.
395
00:22:37,289 --> 00:22:40,091
It's fun being the smart one.
396
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:50,901
This is the San San kudo.
397
00:22:52,972 --> 00:22:56,240
After your mother drinks
from that cup three times,
398
00:22:56,275 --> 00:22:58,141
she'll be married.
399
00:22:58,177 --> 00:23:01,178
She will?! Yep.
Hang on, Louie, Louie.
400
00:23:04,016 --> 00:23:05,782
One...
401
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:08,852
Two...
402
00:23:08,888 --> 00:23:10,153
I gotta stop this! Louie, no!
403
00:23:10,189 --> 00:23:11,189
Mom!
404
00:23:12,024 --> 00:23:13,591
Please don't, Louie.
405
00:23:13,626 --> 00:23:14,724
Too late.
406
00:23:24,970 --> 00:23:27,171
All right, in that case...
407
00:23:40,686 --> 00:23:42,586
I give you my blessing.
408
00:23:42,622 --> 00:23:44,955
Grazie, figlio mio.
409
00:23:52,698 --> 00:23:55,566
Grazie.
410
00:24:31,937 --> 00:24:33,437
Good night, Mr. Walters!
27993
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