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1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:05,373
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
2
00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:13,147
Starring andy griffith...
3
00:00:13,181 --> 00:00:15,449
With ronny howard...
4
00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:18,586
Also starring don knotts.
5
00:00:21,322 --> 00:00:23,824
What time should we
Pick you up -- about 6:00?
6
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,293
The show starts
At 7:00.
7
00:00:25,326 --> 00:00:26,460
If we don't
Want to rush...
8
00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:27,661
Better make it 5:45.
9
00:00:27,695 --> 00:00:29,497
We ought to decide
Where we're gonna eat.
10
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:30,764
You got
Any suggestions?
11
00:00:30,798 --> 00:00:32,766
Any place
Is all right with me--
12
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:34,602
Where everybody else
Wants to go.
13
00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:35,703
How 'bout
Morelli's?
14
00:00:35,736 --> 00:00:36,704
Fine,
I love it.
15
00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:37,805
Oh, I
Like that.
16
00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:39,340
Aw, come on, ange,
You're kiddin'.
17
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:40,541
Not on monday night.
18
00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:42,476
The special is creamed chicken.
19
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:44,612
What's the matter with that?
It's good.
20
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:47,481
Well, I just don't happen
To like my main dish
21
00:00:47,515 --> 00:00:49,350
Concealed in a heavy sauce.
22
00:00:49,383 --> 00:00:51,485
They're not trying
To conceal anything.
23
00:00:51,519 --> 00:00:54,188
Say, how about
The roadside rest?
24
00:00:54,222 --> 00:00:56,857
Oh, good idea. We haven't been
Out there for a long time.
25
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,426
Barn?
26
00:00:58,459 --> 00:01:00,528
Well, if everybody else
Wants to.
27
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,163
Forget it.
28
00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:03,397
Look, the coffee is extra
29
00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:05,366
And they give you one roll
Per person.
30
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,501
I just don't like to be taken,
That's all.
31
00:01:07,535 --> 00:01:09,403
Well, why don't we go to...
32
00:01:09,437 --> 00:01:10,571
No.
33
00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:11,672
Go where?
34
00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:13,274
Never mind, you
Wouldn't like it.
35
00:01:13,307 --> 00:01:14,475
How do you know?
I just know.
36
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:15,643
Let's hear it.
What's the point?
37
00:01:15,676 --> 00:01:16,777
Say it.
38
00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:18,679
The hofbrau
Over in mount pilot.
39
00:01:18,712 --> 00:01:20,881
Wienerschnitzel?
Are you kiddin'?
40
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,384
All right, barney,
Where do you want to go?
41
00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:26,120
Well, it doesn't matter to me.
42
00:01:26,154 --> 00:01:27,788
Hey, hey,
You know--
43
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,857
You know where
You get a good deal
44
00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:31,459
On monday night?
45
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:32,626
Where?
46
00:01:32,660 --> 00:01:33,794
Well, that place...
47
00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:34,862
Oh, no.
48
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:36,430
What's the matter?
49
00:01:36,464 --> 00:01:39,433
Well, we can't
Go anywhere tonight.
50
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:40,468
Look at there.
51
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:42,170
We've got that
Conference call
52
00:01:42,203 --> 00:01:43,537
From the highway
Department.
53
00:01:43,571 --> 00:01:44,572
What?
54
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:45,806
Aw, I forgot
All about that.
55
00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:46,874
Aw... I'm sorry.
56
00:01:46,907 --> 00:01:48,709
I'm afraid
Tonight's out.
57
00:01:48,742 --> 00:01:52,180
Can't you call whoever
You're supposed to talk to?
58
00:01:52,213 --> 00:01:54,415
No, it's a conference call
59
00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:55,916
And the highway
Department
60
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:58,219
Gonna call
All the sheriffs' offices
61
00:01:58,252 --> 00:01:59,920
And they're gonna
Call us at 10:00
62
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:01,589
And we have
To be here...
63
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,424
I wanted to see
That picture.
64
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:05,293
I'm sorry, thelma lou,
It's business.
65
00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:06,294
I know.
66
00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:07,461
I'll make it up to you.
67
00:02:07,495 --> 00:02:09,163
Pick you up later on tonight.
68
00:02:09,197 --> 00:02:10,231
All right.
69
00:02:10,264 --> 00:02:11,732
Hey, I tell you
What we'll do.
70
00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:13,201
We'll go
To the diner,
71
00:02:13,234 --> 00:02:14,568
Grab a bite to eat,
72
00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:16,604
And then you all
Go ahead and go
To the movies
73
00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:18,506
And we'll meet you
Afterwards, okay?
74
00:02:18,539 --> 00:02:19,740
I guess it can't be helped.
75
00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:20,841
Hmm, business.
76
00:02:20,874 --> 00:02:24,278
You sure it's business?
77
00:02:24,312 --> 00:02:26,614
Well, uh, no,
But it's the
Only excuse
78
00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:28,349
I could think of.
79
00:02:30,251 --> 00:02:31,719
Well, we'll pick you up
Then along 6:00,
80
00:02:31,752 --> 00:02:33,487
Quarter to 6:00
Then, okay?
81
00:02:33,521 --> 00:02:34,722
Bye-bye.
82
00:02:34,755 --> 00:02:35,789
Bye.
83
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:36,890
We'll see you. Bye.
84
00:02:36,924 --> 00:02:38,226
[ both laughing ]
85
00:02:38,259 --> 00:02:40,461
Oh, they're sweet girls,
You know it?
86
00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,630
Nice of 'em
To take it that way.
87
00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:43,664
Yeah.
88
00:02:43,697 --> 00:02:45,399
Listen, after
The picture show
89
00:02:45,433 --> 00:02:47,735
They're gonna
Wanna go dancin'.
90
00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:48,769
Oh, yeah.
91
00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:50,604
And I'll say
I have a headache.
92
00:02:50,638 --> 00:02:53,907
And you can drop me
And thelma lou off
At her place
93
00:02:53,941 --> 00:02:56,344
Then you can go on
Over to helen's.
94
00:02:56,377 --> 00:02:57,578
Oh, okay, yeah.
95
00:02:57,611 --> 00:02:59,947
It's better than parkin'
Down at the lake.
96
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,915
The four of us
Sittin' in that car
97
00:03:01,949 --> 00:03:03,517
Never has worked out.
98
00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:04,518
Yeah.
99
00:03:04,552 --> 00:03:08,222
[ car horn blaring ]
100
00:03:08,256 --> 00:03:09,523
What in the world's that?
101
00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:11,292
[ tires screech ]
I don't know.
102
00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:12,793
[ tires screeching ]
103
00:03:12,826 --> 00:03:14,495
[ horn blaring ]
104
00:03:16,497 --> 00:03:17,631
Who is that?
105
00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:19,367
I don't know,
But they were doing 50.
106
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,401
Come on.
107
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,446
[ tires screech ]
108
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:34,882
[ siren blaring ]
109
00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:49,630
All right, ma'am,
110
00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:50,964
Let's see your
Driver's license.
111
00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:53,701
Hello, doll.
Hiya, bernie.
112
00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,437
We haven't seen you
Since the dance last year.
113
00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:58,506
When you didn't
Even take us home.
114
00:03:58,539 --> 00:04:00,007
Have you missed me,
Bernie?
115
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:03,344
Oh, sure. Of course,
I've been busy and...
116
00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:04,945
Have you been busy,
Too, doll?
117
00:04:04,978 --> 00:04:07,881
Well, yeah, I been...
I been busy.
118
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:09,617
You girls ought
Not to speed
119
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:10,951
Through town
Like that.
120
00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:12,386
We just did it for you.
121
00:04:12,420 --> 00:04:13,687
I was sayin'
To daphne
122
00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:16,056
"How can we pick up
On our cop friends?"
123
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,558
And then she said...
124
00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:19,693
Why don't we let them
Pick us up?
125
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:21,329
And that's what we did.
126
00:04:21,362 --> 00:04:22,996
[ women laughing ]
127
00:04:23,030 --> 00:04:25,766
You are gonna give us
A ticket, huh? Huh, doll?
128
00:04:25,799 --> 00:04:27,568
You remember my name,
Don't you?
129
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:28,869
It's daphne:
D-a-p-h-n-e.
130
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,571
I live over
In mount pilot.
131
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:31,672
My telephone
Number is...
132
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:32,973
I don't need the
Phone number now.
133
00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:34,442
All right, let's
Break it up.
134
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:35,443
Let's move on.
135
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:36,644
Barn...
136
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,912
Oh, isn't he just
The cutest cossack
137
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:40,781
You've ever seen?
138
00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:43,684
Now, listen, you girls
Were doing 45 miles an hour
139
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:45,386
In a 20-mile zone.
140
00:04:45,419 --> 00:04:47,655
Oh, aren't we terrible?
141
00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:49,923
Yeah, take us to jail.
142
00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:51,925
[ women laughing ]
143
00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,394
All right,
Let's break it up.
144
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:55,429
Don't you have
Anything better to do
145
00:04:55,463 --> 00:04:56,730
Than block the sidewalk?
146
00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:57,998
Move out of here!
147
00:04:58,031 --> 00:04:59,833
Let's not make
A big thing out of this.
148
00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:02,336
Here's what we do --
We'd better get 'em
Out of town fast.
149
00:05:02,370 --> 00:05:04,572
Get 'em out of town.
Right. How?
150
00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:06,440
Well, you ride with one
151
00:05:06,474 --> 00:05:08,008
And I'll take the other
In the squad car
152
00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:09,810
And we'll dump 'em
At the county line.
153
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:11,345
Dump 'em at the county line.
154
00:05:11,379 --> 00:05:12,980
I was just going
To suggest that.
155
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:14,415
Don't leave us alone.
156
00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:17,518
We're dangerous
Criminals.
157
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:19,887
But we don't want to go
Back to mount pilot.
158
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:22,490
Particularly when we drove
All the way over here
159
00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:23,657
Just to see you.
160
00:05:23,691 --> 00:05:26,026
Aren't you gonna
Give us a ticket, huh?
161
00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:27,761
Well, no,
Not this time.
162
00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:31,098
Well, maybe you'll give it
To us the next time we see you.
163
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:32,866
When should we come back?
164
00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:35,503
Uh...
165
00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:37,771
Hey, barn?
Hey, barn?
166
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,707
I got an idea.
167
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,610
How 'bout next time
We go over to mount pilot,
168
00:05:42,643 --> 00:05:43,877
We look the girls up
169
00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,746
And we'll give 'em
A ticket then, huh?
170
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:46,780
Right.
171
00:05:46,814 --> 00:05:47,781
Promise?
172
00:05:47,815 --> 00:05:48,782
Yeah, I promise.
173
00:05:48,816 --> 00:05:49,850
All right.
174
00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:51,084
Bye-bye, doll.
See you soon.
175
00:05:51,118 --> 00:05:53,153
Don't forget the ticket.
176
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,388
No, no, no.
177
00:05:54,422 --> 00:05:55,389
Bye-bye.
178
00:05:55,423 --> 00:05:56,557
Bye, bernie.
179
00:05:56,590 --> 00:05:58,926
You're such
A doll, doll.
180
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,060
Bye, bernie.
181
00:06:00,093 --> 00:06:01,462
Yeah, bye.
182
00:06:04,565 --> 00:06:06,600
[ sighs ]
183
00:06:07,668 --> 00:06:08,836
You all right?
184
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,671
Yeah, fine.
185
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:11,872
[ clears throat ]
186
00:06:11,905 --> 00:06:13,707
Glad thelma lou
Didn't see that.
187
00:06:13,741 --> 00:06:15,409
Yeah, helen, too.
188
00:06:15,443 --> 00:06:17,478
Good thing we got
Rid of 'em.
189
00:06:17,511 --> 00:06:19,713
Be just like the last time
They was in town.
190
00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:22,450
Yeah, thelma lou
Didn't speak to me
For ten days.
191
00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:24,785
That's the closest
We ever came to breakin' up.
192
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:26,520
Yeah, well...
Well, it's over.
193
00:06:26,554 --> 00:06:28,989
[ exhaling ]
194
00:06:29,022 --> 00:06:30,958
Uh, um, you wanna, um...
195
00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:41,535
Right. Right.
196
00:06:41,569 --> 00:06:45,739
Extend
The 50-mile speed zone
197
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:47,675
As far as fancy gap.
198
00:06:47,708 --> 00:06:48,942
Right.
199
00:06:48,976 --> 00:06:52,446
And highway one
Stays the same.
200
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,948
Okay, we'll
Take care of that.
201
00:06:54,982 --> 00:06:56,550
Right.
202
00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:57,751
Thank you, sir.
203
00:06:57,785 --> 00:07:00,087
Okay, wes,
I'll see ya.
204
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:02,155
Oh, monroe?
You still on?
205
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:04,091
Well, listen,
Listen--
206
00:07:04,124 --> 00:07:07,060
You send me a ham
And I'll send you
Some sourwood honey.
207
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:08,662
How's that?
208
00:07:08,696 --> 00:07:09,797
Right.
209
00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:10,798
Bye.
210
00:07:10,831 --> 00:07:11,832
Get all that?
211
00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:12,900
Yeah, sourwood honey.
212
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:13,934
No...
213
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:14,935
[ chuckling ]
214
00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:16,003
Yeah.
215
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:17,671
We better go
And meet the girls.
216
00:07:17,705 --> 00:07:19,172
That movie will be
Lettin' out.
217
00:07:19,206 --> 00:07:21,742
This is no night
To keep 'em waitin'.
218
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,043
You'd better know it.
219
00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:25,145
[ knock on door ]
220
00:07:25,178 --> 00:07:26,547
Come in.
221
00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:29,883
Surprise!
Surprise!
222
00:07:30,984 --> 00:07:32,152
What are you girls
Doin' back?
223
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:33,587
What is this?
224
00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:35,255
We felt sorry for you boys
Working tonight
225
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,724
So we thought
We'd come over.
226
00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:38,158
Yeah, we thought
We'd come over
227
00:07:38,191 --> 00:07:40,093
And brighten things up
For you a little.
228
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:41,929
We even brought
Our own music.
229
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,063
[ mid-tempo music plays ]
230
00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:44,998
And food.
231
00:07:45,032 --> 00:07:46,667
We're gonna
Have a picnic.
232
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:47,735
Oh...
233
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:49,102
But first,
Let's dance.
234
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:58,011
Oh, you're such
A wonderful dancer.
235
00:07:58,045 --> 00:08:01,048
Relax, bernie, relax.
I'll lead.
236
00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:02,883
[ stammering ]
237
00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:04,117
Girls...
238
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:07,588
We, we, we can't
Have a party.
239
00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:09,122
We're workin'.
240
00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:10,290
We're not leavin'.
241
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,592
I want to party.
242
00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:12,726
Let's play jail.
243
00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:14,895
Yeah, let's play jail.
244
00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:15,929
[ laughing ]
245
00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:17,197
Play jail.
246
00:08:17,230 --> 00:08:18,699
Yeah, that'll be fun.
Come on.
247
00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:20,801
Helen and thelma lou
Are waitin' for us.
248
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,002
What are we gonna do?
249
00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:25,038
Uh, leave 'em in there.
250
00:08:25,072 --> 00:08:27,575
Leave 'em in there,
And you stay here with 'em.
251
00:08:27,608 --> 00:08:29,176
I'll go meet the girls,
Take 'em to eat,
252
00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,878
Then I'll take 'em home,
And come back
253
00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:32,546
And we'll figure out
Somethin' to do.
254
00:08:32,580 --> 00:08:33,914
I'll tell thelma lou
255
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,749
That we picked up
A couple of prisoners
256
00:08:35,783 --> 00:08:36,884
And you had to stay
Here with 'em.
257
00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:37,985
Okay, right, right.
258
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,853
I want my ukulele.
259
00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:41,021
Well, give it to her.
260
00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:42,790
Anything to
Keep her quiet.
261
00:08:42,823 --> 00:08:44,024
Where you going, doll?
262
00:08:44,057 --> 00:08:46,059
Uh, I've got
A little errand to run
263
00:08:46,093 --> 00:08:47,695
And I'll be
Right back.
264
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:48,829
Don't be long, doll.
265
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:50,163
Oh, just a few minutes.
266
00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:51,264
Now, listen,
267
00:08:51,298 --> 00:08:52,866
Keep 'em as quiet
As you can
268
00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:54,167
And I'll turn
The lights out
269
00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:55,636
And you keep
'em out.
270
00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:57,838
Yeah, maybe they'll go
To sleep or somethin'.
271
00:08:57,871 --> 00:08:59,072
Okay, good luck.
272
00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,915
[ ukulele strumming ]
273
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:17,357
Both: * we were sailing along
On moonlight bay... *
274
00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,760
Well... Have enough?
275
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:20,761
Plenty.
276
00:09:20,794 --> 00:09:22,129
Good.
277
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,698
How did you happen to book
Prisoners at night?
278
00:09:24,732 --> 00:09:29,169
Uh... The, uh, the uh...
State police
279
00:09:29,202 --> 00:09:35,008
Handed 'em over to us
And... We just booked 'em.
280
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,716
What's the matter?
281
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:44,818
Nothing, I've just
Never seen you
282
00:09:44,852 --> 00:09:45,986
So ill at ease.
283
00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:48,121
Oh, well...
Booking those prisoners--
284
00:09:48,155 --> 00:09:51,124
And the state police
Handed 'em over to us...
285
00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:52,926
You said that.
286
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:57,097
Uh, if you've,
Uh, had enough and...
287
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:59,099
Excuse me...
288
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:02,636
Andy, is that perfume?
289
00:10:02,670 --> 00:10:05,005
No, no.
290
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:07,407
Uh, I was... Oh, I was
Over to the barber shop
291
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:12,079
And floyd had some samples
And he, uh...
292
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:15,315
So, if you've had enough...
293
00:10:15,348 --> 00:10:18,118
Poor barney, having
To spend the night
294
00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:19,419
At the courthouse.
295
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,889
Oh, I wouldn't worry
About barney.
296
00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:24,725
He's probably fast asleep
With the lights off
297
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:26,026
And everything.
298
00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:16,977
What are you
Doing in here?
299
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:20,881
This just happens
To be my cell, charlie.
300
00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:21,882
Get him.
301
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:23,316
This is my cell
302
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:26,453
And I would
Appreciate it vastly
303
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:29,957
If you would move
To the next room.
304
00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:31,358
You locked the door.
305
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:34,728
Oh... Well,
I got two bunks.
306
00:11:34,762 --> 00:11:36,129
Be my guest.
307
00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:39,132
Are you trying
To get fresh?
308
00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:40,467
[ indistinct shouting ]
309
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:43,904
Barney, barney, my cell
Is filled with women.
310
00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:45,205
Barney!
311
00:11:45,238 --> 00:11:48,108
Help me, help me!
312
00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:50,010
[ shouting continues ]
313
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,945
All right, now
Stop that.
314
00:11:51,979 --> 00:11:54,314
Stop that.
Hold it!
315
00:11:54,347 --> 00:11:56,416
Well, then
If you've had enough.
316
00:11:56,449 --> 00:11:58,118
What's your rush,
Andy?
317
00:11:58,151 --> 00:11:59,386
It's only 10:30.
318
00:11:59,419 --> 00:12:03,256
Oh, there's no hurry.
There's no hurry.
319
00:12:03,290 --> 00:12:04,758
Oh, I'm sorry.
320
00:12:04,792 --> 00:12:06,994
Andy, I have never
Seen you so nervous.
321
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:08,195
Oh, I'm not nervous.
322
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,430
It's the glass
Was sittin' on the napkin
323
00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:11,765
And I picked it up
324
00:12:11,799 --> 00:12:13,801
And, well, I guess
They'll get that.
325
00:12:13,834 --> 00:12:16,036
I'll just, uh, I'll just
Get the check.
326
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:19,239
I just don't know what's
The matter with andy tonight.
327
00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:21,041
Why don't we go
By the courthouse
328
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,542
And see if the lights
Are on.
329
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,912
Barney might like
A sandwich or something
330
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:27,147
And we could keep both
Of 'em company for a while.
331
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:28,315
Oh, that's a good idea.
332
00:12:28,348 --> 00:12:30,918
Cheer 'em up.
333
00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,791
No, there's no point
In going over there
334
00:12:37,825 --> 00:12:39,827
Because barney--
He'll be asleep.
335
00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:42,295
He goes to sleep the minute
He hits the sack.
336
00:12:42,329 --> 00:12:45,198
Why, andy, I don't see
Any harm in just passing by.
337
00:12:45,232 --> 00:12:48,035
Well, I guarantee you
The lights are gonna be out.
338
00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:49,302
Oh, come on, andy,
Just in case.
339
00:12:49,336 --> 00:12:50,337
Yeah.
340
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:55,308
Now, I told you
I don't wanna dance.
341
00:12:55,342 --> 00:12:57,945
There's a time
And a place
For everything
342
00:12:57,978 --> 00:12:59,212
And this just ain't it.
343
00:12:59,246 --> 00:13:01,448
Now, will you quit
Askin' me to dance?
344
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:02,883
Oh, you know what?
345
00:13:02,916 --> 00:13:04,351
You changed.
346
00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:07,420
You used to be fun-loving
Bernie, but you ain't anymore.
347
00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:09,222
You're gettin' real square.
348
00:13:09,256 --> 00:13:12,826
The only person around here
Who wanted to have any fun
349
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:14,494
Was that nice, chubby drunk
350
00:13:14,527 --> 00:13:15,829
And you threw him out.
351
00:13:15,863 --> 00:13:18,431
When I'm off duty,
I'm fun-lovin'.
352
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:19,833
When I'm on duty,
353
00:13:19,867 --> 00:13:21,468
I'm barney fife,
Deputy sheriff.
354
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:23,570
And you know
What else you are, bernie?
355
00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:24,604
You're ungrateful.
356
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,173
This whole thing
Was planned
357
00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:28,275
Just to keep you
And your boyfriend company.
358
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:30,177
If I'd known it was gonna turn
Out like this,
359
00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:31,411
Why, I could have
Stayed home
360
00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:33,046
And worked on
My bathroom curtains.
361
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:34,314
Yeah.
362
00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:36,483
Oh, come on, bernie,
Just one little dance.
363
00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:38,185
No, now, I don't
Wanna dance.
364
00:13:38,218 --> 00:13:40,053
Now, I'm gonna turn
This light off.
365
00:13:40,087 --> 00:13:41,221
If you wanna stay,
366
00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:43,056
You go right in that
Cell and be quiet.
367
00:13:43,090 --> 00:13:45,592
If not, go home and work
On your bathroom curtains.
368
00:13:52,499 --> 00:13:55,068
[ laughing ]
This is fun, bernie.
369
00:13:55,102 --> 00:13:57,604
I want this light off,
And you stop that!
370
00:13:57,637 --> 00:14:01,608
Yeah, skip,
You don't kiss a cop on duty.
371
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:08,015
There, you see?
372
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:09,616
The lights are out.
373
00:14:09,649 --> 00:14:11,218
Well, let's go.
374
00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:12,285
Oh, look.
375
00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:14,487
I wonder
If there's any trouble.
376
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,389
Come on.
No, no, no.
377
00:14:16,423 --> 00:14:18,025
No. You...
You stay here.
378
00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:19,960
It might be dangerous
If the prisoners got loose.
379
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:21,594
We ought to go
Do something.
380
00:14:21,628 --> 00:14:24,197
No, no, no.
I'll go in. You stay here.
381
00:14:24,231 --> 00:14:26,666
You stay here.
382
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:29,402
Now, you be sure
And stay right here.
383
00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:35,208
[ music playing ]
384
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:36,476
Oh, doll!
385
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,511
I thought
You'd never get back.
386
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:40,213
Uh, uh, well, listen...
387
00:14:40,247 --> 00:14:42,649
Excuse us. Excuse us
Just a minute.
388
00:14:42,682 --> 00:14:44,317
Hey, barn, listen...
389
00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:46,086
Listen!
Oh, andy,
It's just been wild.
390
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,687
I had to throw otis
Out of here
391
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,923
Listen!
And I haven't been able
To do anything
392
00:14:49,957 --> 00:14:51,024
With those girls...
393
00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:52,459
We have to do
Something fast.
394
00:14:52,492 --> 00:14:54,327
Helen and thelma lou
Are outside.
395
00:14:54,361 --> 00:14:56,329
But the thing
Is that... What?
396
00:14:56,363 --> 00:14:58,698
Yes. Helen and thelma lou
Are outside.
397
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:01,434
Now, we got to get
Them girls out of here.
398
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:03,603
We'll take 'em out
The back. Fast, fast.
399
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,972
Let's dance.
400
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:06,173
Hey, listen, girls.
401
00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:08,141
Listen, listen,
We got to leave.
402
00:15:08,175 --> 00:15:09,176
So, come on.
403
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:10,343
Wait a minute.
404
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:11,945
Wait a minute.
405
00:15:11,979 --> 00:15:13,346
One more dance.
406
00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,215
No. No. No. No. No.
407
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:16,984
Helen: andy.
408
00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:19,319
You seem to be getting
A better class of prisoner.
409
00:15:19,352 --> 00:15:20,320
Uh...
410
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:21,989
Well, helen, this isn't...
411
00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:24,491
This isn't
What you think it is.
412
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:25,993
You poor boy--
413
00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:29,562
Having to spend the night
Standing guard.
414
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,498
Now, wait a minute,
Thelma lou.
415
00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:33,266
Don't jump
To conclusions.
416
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,535
You don't know what
We were doing here.
417
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:38,105
You don't know at all
What we were doing.
418
00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,572
What were we
Doing, andy?
419
00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:42,209
Actually, we were
Releasing some prisoners.
420
00:15:42,242 --> 00:15:44,244
We were releasing
These prisoners.
421
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:45,745
Well, you're released.
422
00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:48,248
Your methods are
Very interesting.
423
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:49,516
Let's go, thelma.
424
00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:51,151
Helen!
425
00:15:51,184 --> 00:15:53,386
Thelma lou!
426
00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,088
Pardon me for living.
427
00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:56,389
Who are they anyway?
428
00:15:56,423 --> 00:15:58,258
Who cares?
They're gone.
429
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,060
Let's have that dance now.
430
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,461
Girls, tell you what.
431
00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:04,231
I'm gonna give you
30 seconds to get
Out of here.
432
00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:05,532
What?
433
00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:08,401
I've tried all day
To be nice about this thing
434
00:16:08,435 --> 00:16:10,170
And that didn't work out
At all,
435
00:16:10,203 --> 00:16:11,504
So just go now.
436
00:16:11,538 --> 00:16:14,141
Well, we were just trying
To have a little fun.
437
00:16:14,174 --> 00:16:15,708
That's all the
Thanks you get
438
00:16:15,742 --> 00:16:17,644
For trying to be nice
To a person
439
00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,347
And we packed a picnic
Basket and everything.
440
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:23,083
Please, just go.
441
00:16:23,116 --> 00:16:25,485
Why, you ought to be
Ashamed of yourself--
442
00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:27,154
Making her cry like this.
443
00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:28,521
I tried to tell you.
444
00:16:28,555 --> 00:16:29,522
Oh, shut up.
445
00:16:29,556 --> 00:16:31,191
Now, we're the ones...
446
00:16:31,224 --> 00:16:32,659
Shut up, bernie!
447
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:34,294
Please go. Just go.
448
00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,563
Yeah, come on, hon,
Let's go.
449
00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:39,399
You know what this proves,
Don't you?
450
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:42,035
You just can't be nice
To people.
451
00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:43,136
If...
452
00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:46,339
Shut up, bernie.
Just shut up.
453
00:16:48,075 --> 00:16:49,742
[ crying ]
454
00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:51,444
[ door slams ]
455
00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:54,481
Well...
456
00:16:54,514 --> 00:16:55,682
It's been quite a night.
457
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:57,150
Mm-hmm.
458
00:16:57,184 --> 00:17:02,155
So far we've lost
Four girls and one drunk.
459
00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:04,424
Well, I'll tell you
Where you blew it, ange.
460
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,059
Where I blew it?
461
00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:08,195
Yeah, letting helen
And thelma lou
Come over here.
462
00:17:08,228 --> 00:17:09,529
I didn't let 'em come.
They just came.
463
00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:11,264
You shoulda done
Everything possible
464
00:17:11,298 --> 00:17:12,399
To keep 'em out of here.
465
00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:13,800
If it'd have been me...
466
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:17,304
Oh, shut up, bernie.
Just shut up.
467
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:20,807
It's quite all right,
Andy.
468
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:22,609
We certainly have no hold
On each other.
469
00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:25,178
If you want to break a date
With me, it's quite all right.
470
00:17:25,212 --> 00:17:27,380
Now, helen, we're
Both sensible people.
471
00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:28,581
Do you really believe
472
00:17:28,615 --> 00:17:30,617
That I would break
A date with you
473
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:33,353
In order to have a party
In the jail with them?
474
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:34,754
Now, let me explain to you.
475
00:17:34,787 --> 00:17:37,624
Well, now, if we're both
Such sensible people,
476
00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:40,260
Why do you have
To explain to me at all?
477
00:17:40,293 --> 00:17:42,595
Well, I'm sittin'
In the car with you
478
00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:45,198
At 8:30 in the morning
Doing something.
479
00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:47,300
I don't know
Exactly what it is.
480
00:17:47,334 --> 00:17:48,801
Now,
Won't you understand?
481
00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:51,171
Oh, instant
Understanding, andy--
482
00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:53,473
That makes our relationship
So wonderful...
483
00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:54,641
And so dull.
484
00:17:58,145 --> 00:17:58,845
How 'bout this?
485
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:00,447
How 'bout this?
486
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:03,483
How 'bout tonight
We... We start off fresh--
487
00:18:03,516 --> 00:18:05,852
Try to get on the
Same wavelength?
488
00:18:05,885 --> 00:18:07,554
Barney's gonna try
To get thelma lou
489
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:08,821
To come over to the house.
490
00:18:08,855 --> 00:18:11,324
You come.
We'll have a nice supper.
491
00:18:11,358 --> 00:18:13,426
Afterwards,
We'll have a talk.
492
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:15,295
Now, how does that
Sound to you?
493
00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:16,896
Oh...
494
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:18,665
Fine, I guess.
495
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:20,633
Good. Good.
496
00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:23,303
I'll pick you up
About 6:30.
497
00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:25,838
Look, thel, believe me
498
00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:28,741
A thing like that
Can happen to anybody.
499
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:31,244
We just couldn't
Get rid of 'em,
500
00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:32,712
And that's the truth.
501
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:35,515
Didn't look like
You tried very hard--
502
00:18:35,548 --> 00:18:38,318
That lipstick
All over your face.
503
00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:40,553
Well, she forced
Herself on me.
504
00:18:40,587 --> 00:18:41,788
If it was all so innocent,
505
00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:43,890
Why didn't you tell me
About it right away?
506
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:47,460
Well, I didn't think
You'd understand.
507
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:49,329
Why wouldn't I understand?
508
00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:50,630
Well, because I...
509
00:18:50,663 --> 00:18:53,533
Well, I'm the most
Understanding person
510
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:54,867
In the whole world.
511
00:18:54,901 --> 00:18:56,269
Oh, I know that.
512
00:18:56,303 --> 00:18:58,571
And if you tell me
Something...
513
00:18:58,605 --> 00:18:59,906
I'll believe it.
514
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:03,376
Okay, I'm telling you,
She forced herself on me.
515
00:19:03,410 --> 00:19:04,777
That's a lie.
516
00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:08,415
Look, thel,
517
00:19:08,448 --> 00:19:12,452
I should have told you
Right off, but I didn't.
518
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:13,920
And I'm sorry.
519
00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:17,424
I apologize.
520
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,428
Can't we just
Forget about it?
521
00:19:25,932 --> 00:19:28,735
You know I'm crazy
About you.
522
00:19:31,804 --> 00:19:34,707
You promise never
To tell me a lie again?
523
00:19:34,741 --> 00:19:35,875
I promise.
524
00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:38,345
And not ever to see
Those girls again?
525
00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:39,379
It's a deal.
526
00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:43,916
Okay, you're forgiven.
527
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,423
[ door slams ]
528
00:20:18,518 --> 00:20:20,987
Well?
529
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:24,524
How'd it go?
530
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:26,259
You know...
531
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:28,728
She was plenty salty,
532
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:30,463
But she finally
Forgive me.
533
00:20:30,497 --> 00:20:33,032
Mm.
534
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:34,267
Mm.
535
00:20:35,468 --> 00:20:38,538
I think I squeaked by.
536
00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:44,577
Well... We'll get 'em over
At the house tonight.
537
00:20:44,611 --> 00:20:47,514
We'll get a little
Good food in 'em...
538
00:20:47,547 --> 00:20:49,516
Put on a little soft music.
539
00:20:49,549 --> 00:20:52,885
Maybe they'll be
A little easier to talk to, huh?
540
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,954
About what time?
6:30.
541
00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:56,889
I'll come by and get you
542
00:20:56,923 --> 00:20:59,692
And then
We'll go get the girls.
543
00:20:59,726 --> 00:21:01,728
You know,
544
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:03,963
This whole thing has just
Been like a nightmare.
545
00:21:03,996 --> 00:21:05,064
You better know it.
546
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:06,966
Ain't been
A bit pleasant, has it?
547
00:21:09,436 --> 00:21:12,472
You know, I've been doing
A lot of thinking about it.
548
00:21:12,505 --> 00:21:14,607
Yeah?
549
00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:16,776
You want to know
Something, ange?
550
00:21:16,809 --> 00:21:18,911
What?
551
00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:22,682
Our only crime is that
We're attractive to women.
552
00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:29,055
Here we are.
553
00:21:29,088 --> 00:21:30,457
Come on in.
554
00:21:30,490 --> 00:21:31,558
Oh, hello,
Aunt bee.
555
00:21:31,591 --> 00:21:32,725
Oh, hi, aunt bee.
556
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:33,893
The girls come over.
557
00:21:33,926 --> 00:21:35,628
Andy...
558
00:21:35,662 --> 00:21:37,730
Andy...Andy...
559
00:21:37,764 --> 00:21:40,833
What you been doing, drinkin'
Cooking sherry again?
560
00:21:40,867 --> 00:21:42,535
Hi, doll.
561
00:21:42,569 --> 00:21:43,770
Hi, bernie.
562
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:46,005
We just came back
To tell you we're sorry
563
00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:48,408
And we still
Wanna be friends.
564
00:21:48,441 --> 00:21:51,478
And I'm still crazy
About you, bernie. [ smooches ]
565
00:21:51,511 --> 00:21:53,780
Andy:
Oh, uh, hel-helen...
566
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,915
Helen... Helen, wait.
567
00:21:55,948 --> 00:21:57,350
Thelma lou!
568
00:21:59,085 --> 00:22:00,720
Ah...
569
00:22:04,457 --> 00:22:06,359
Well, what do we do now?
570
00:22:06,393 --> 00:22:07,527
I don't know.
571
00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:09,362
I think we've had it.
572
00:22:09,396 --> 00:22:12,432
[ up-tempo music playing ]
573
00:22:19,038 --> 00:22:20,039
Ange?
574
00:22:20,072 --> 00:22:21,608
Hmm?
575
00:22:21,641 --> 00:22:24,577
Since it's saturday night...
576
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,715
They are good dancers.
577
00:22:35,888 --> 00:22:38,625
Well, what you've got
To say, barn,
578
00:22:38,658 --> 00:22:42,995
Is that helen and thelma lou are
Both very understanding girls--
579
00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:45,565
Girls you can talk to,
Explain things to.
580
00:22:45,598 --> 00:22:47,133
Yeah.
581
00:22:47,166 --> 00:22:51,103
Yeah, that thel's a sweet girl.
She's crazy about me.
582
00:22:51,137 --> 00:22:53,005
[ both laugh ]
583
00:22:53,039 --> 00:22:55,675
[ engine revs, tires screech ]
584
00:22:58,545 --> 00:22:59,679
Did you see that?
585
00:22:59,712 --> 00:23:01,548
Yeah, must have been
Doing 50.
586
00:23:01,581 --> 00:23:02,882
Who was it?
587
00:23:02,915 --> 00:23:04,183
I don't know.
588
00:23:04,216 --> 00:23:06,419
Just saw the back of it--
Old jalopy.
589
00:23:06,453 --> 00:23:07,987
Old jalopy?
590
00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:09,522
Yeah, two women in it.
591
00:23:09,556 --> 00:23:10,923
Two women?
592
00:23:13,092 --> 00:23:14,927
Yeah, two women.
593
00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:17,196
Actually, I don't think
They was doing 50.
594
00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:18,665
Maybe 40.
595
00:23:18,698 --> 00:23:21,868
Yeah, I'd say 30.
596
00:23:21,901 --> 00:23:24,036
Actually closer to 25.
597
00:23:24,070 --> 00:23:25,805
25, 20.
598
00:23:25,838 --> 00:23:27,974
Light traffic conditions
Anyway.
599
00:23:28,007 --> 00:23:29,776
Yeah, dry streets.
600
00:23:29,809 --> 00:23:32,111
(sighs)
601
00:23:33,580 --> 00:23:35,815
What do we do if they
Come back?
602
00:23:35,848 --> 00:23:37,917
Go inside?
603
00:23:37,950 --> 00:23:40,920
I like the way you think.
604
00:23:52,832 --> 00:23:55,968
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
40192
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