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1
00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:06,074
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
2
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:12,380
Starring andy griffith...
3
00:00:12,413 --> 00:00:14,682
With ronny howard...
4
00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:18,252
Also starring don knotts.
5
00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:23,257
Well, here he
Goes again.
6
00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:27,061
Every month, pull
Up stakes like an
Arab and off you go.
7
00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:29,330
Barney, that was
Three months ago.
8
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:31,832
I was thinking about
Moving to raleigh.
9
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,234
Oh! That long.
10
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:34,568
Three months.
11
00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:36,470
Well, you're practically
Putting down roots here.
12
00:00:36,504 --> 00:00:38,106
And I didn't
Take the job.
13
00:00:38,139 --> 00:00:39,807
And you're not
Going to this time.
14
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:41,242
You can't.
15
00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:42,743
So why get me
All excited?
16
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:45,313
It's bad for
My digestion
Before lunch.
17
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:46,747
I wanted
To talk to you
18
00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:48,782
Because there's
A very good chance
19
00:00:48,816 --> 00:00:50,418
I might just
Take this job.
20
00:00:50,451 --> 00:00:52,520
I told ed crumbpacker
I would.
21
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,288
Ed crumbpacker. Ed crumbpacker.
22
00:00:54,322 --> 00:00:56,490
Some guy you go hunting with
Twice a year.
23
00:00:56,524 --> 00:00:58,426
We know one another very well.
24
00:00:58,459 --> 00:01:00,294
And I suppose that's
More important
25
00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:02,430
Than a lifetime
Of friendship and teamwork
26
00:01:02,463 --> 00:01:05,299
Fighting shoulder-to-shoulder
Against organized crime!
27
00:01:05,333 --> 00:01:07,268
You want to sit down.
28
00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:13,441
Now, barney, ed crumbpacker
Is with a very big company.
29
00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:14,775
I know. I know.
30
00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:17,111
It's one of them big
Industrial giants.
31
00:01:17,145 --> 00:01:20,214
Don't you know you're gonna
Get swallowed up, andy?
32
00:01:20,248 --> 00:01:21,515
No, I won't.
33
00:01:21,549 --> 00:01:23,817
Now, they got a big
Executive training program
34
00:01:23,851 --> 00:01:25,853
And they-they want to
Put me in that.
35
00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:27,721
It'll mean a lot
More money to me.
36
00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:29,790
And they got offices
All over the world.
37
00:01:29,823 --> 00:01:32,826
Ed told me they might even
Transfer me out of the country.
38
00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:34,862
Maybe europe,
Maybe even south america.
39
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,198
What about aunt bee and opie?
40
00:01:37,231 --> 00:01:38,599
I'd take them with me.
41
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:41,269
You know they don't speak
A word of south american.
42
00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:43,704
I swear, andy.
43
00:01:43,737 --> 00:01:47,375
Some guy calls you from
St. Paul, minnesota
44
00:01:47,408 --> 00:01:49,877
And you fall right
Out of your tree.
45
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:52,580
And what about her?
46
00:01:54,248 --> 00:01:55,749
Who's "Her"?
47
00:01:55,783 --> 00:01:57,718
You know who's her.
48
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:02,490
Just sit down.
49
00:02:05,293 --> 00:02:07,661
Now, barney, you know
How things stand
50
00:02:07,695 --> 00:02:08,929
Between helen and me
51
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:12,166
And if they keep going
The way they have been
52
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:14,235
I expect
I'd send for her.
53
00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:15,869
Oh, you're gonna
Send for her?
54
00:02:15,903 --> 00:02:17,671
Yeah, I'm gonna
Send for her.
55
00:02:17,705 --> 00:02:19,740
You gonna send
For me, too?
56
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,911
Or am I gonna stay
Here and be sheriff?
57
00:02:26,714 --> 00:02:29,650
Well, you ought to at least run.
58
00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:34,355
Well, I can't think of anybody
Who's more qualified than you
59
00:02:34,388 --> 00:02:36,757
And I don't know of anybody else
That's gonna file.
60
00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:38,759
I was supposed
To file for re-election
61
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:40,628
Sometime in the next
Couple of days
62
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,196
And I'm not gonna file.
63
00:02:43,231 --> 00:02:45,199
Oh... I don't know, andy.
64
00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:48,902
Well, if you don't run,
And nobody else files
65
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:50,638
Who's gonna be the law?
66
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,542
Town would be wide open,
Wouldn't it?
67
00:02:54,575 --> 00:02:56,344
Sure it would.
68
00:02:56,377 --> 00:02:59,480
And everybody knows you
And likes you and everything
69
00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:02,683
And you've learned a lot
In the last several years.
70
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:05,319
It'd mean
A lot more money to you.
71
00:03:05,353 --> 00:03:07,788
You might be able
To move out of that room
72
00:03:07,821 --> 00:03:10,824
And into a regular house
Or something.
73
00:03:13,727 --> 00:03:15,863
'course, you do
What you want to.
74
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:33,581
What's that?
75
00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:35,716
It's in the ring.
76
00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:44,492
Oh, my.
77
00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:46,760
That's another thing
I'm worried about
78
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:48,896
If we should end up
In south america.
79
00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,498
The food...
80
00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:53,634
They eat very strange things
Down there.
81
00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:54,935
What do they eat, paw?
82
00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,537
Same things as we do.
83
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,406
Beans, meat, tomatoes...
84
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:00,040
And they have
Special dishes.
85
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:03,611
Uh, they got a thing
Called a tortilla.
86
00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:06,046
You mean they eat
Those great big spiders?
87
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,648
No. That's a tarantula.
88
00:04:07,681 --> 00:04:09,850
Tortilla.
Oh.
89
00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:12,386
Well, I'm taking along
Some canned goods
90
00:04:12,420 --> 00:04:13,954
Just to be on the safe side.
91
00:04:13,987 --> 00:04:16,290
I could always make
Some heavy soup.
92
00:04:16,324 --> 00:04:18,326
We're not going to the jungle.
93
00:04:18,359 --> 00:04:19,893
I know. I know, andy.
94
00:04:21,028 --> 00:04:23,063
I think it'll work out
Real good for us.
95
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,465
[ phone rings ]
96
00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:25,799
Mm. Well...
97
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,402
Don't touch that.
98
00:04:35,443 --> 00:04:36,644
Hello.
99
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:39,713
St. Paul, minnesota?
100
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:41,048
Yeah.
101
00:04:42,383 --> 00:04:44,918
Hello, ed. We was just
Talking about you.
102
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,390
Uh-huh.
103
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:51,525
Well, you don't have
To apologize, ed.
104
00:04:51,559 --> 00:04:52,993
Aunt bee, do
You think...?
105
00:04:53,026 --> 00:04:54,528
Just a minute.
106
00:04:54,562 --> 00:04:56,830
Job went
To somebody's cousin, huh?
107
00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:02,370
Well... Maybe it'll
All be for the best.
108
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:05,873
I don't know whether I'd like it
Too much out of mayberry.
109
00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:07,741
Small town, you know?
110
00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:09,076
Right.
111
00:05:10,578 --> 00:05:11,779
Good-bye.
112
00:05:23,691 --> 00:05:25,359
[ sighs ]
113
00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:28,462
Ed crumbpacker.
114
00:05:28,496 --> 00:05:30,364
I know. I heard.
115
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:33,434
Well...
116
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:35,369
I guess that's that.
117
00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:36,770
What, paw?
118
00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:40,941
Oh, nothing.
We're gonna stay.
119
00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:43,444
But they can't do that!
They just did.
120
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:45,746
Well, that's a terrible thing
To do to a man.
121
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:48,549
That's like pulling the rug
Right out from under you.
122
00:05:48,582 --> 00:05:51,752
And here you didn't file
For re-election.
123
00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:54,021
Well,
That was my own idea.
124
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:57,591
Ed crumbpacker --
He said don't say anything
125
00:05:57,625 --> 00:05:59,493
Till the job's official.
126
00:05:59,527 --> 00:06:02,763
Well, no harm done.
I'll just withdraw in
Your favor, of course.
127
00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:04,532
Oh, you can't.
State law.
128
00:06:04,565 --> 00:06:07,868
Well, now, what kind of a law
Is that?
129
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:09,970
It's on the books.
The ballot's been printed,
130
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:12,039
And you're the only one
Running for sheriff.
131
00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:13,807
Oh, this is just nonsense --
132
00:06:13,841 --> 00:06:16,677
Me running for sheriff
With you still around.
133
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,447
Well...
134
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:21,014
Don't worry about it.
135
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:23,651
It's just
One of those things.
136
00:06:23,684 --> 00:06:25,986
Andy, this -- this leaves you
Out of everything.
137
00:06:26,019 --> 00:06:29,723
I mean,
What about a job?
138
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:32,960
I don't know.
139
00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:35,529
Something will come up.
140
00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:38,532
Well, just don't you do anything
Till you hear from me.
141
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:41,034
I'll think of something
By the time we caucus.
142
00:06:44,838 --> 00:06:46,440
All right, quiet, please.
143
00:06:46,474 --> 00:06:47,641
Quiet, please!
144
00:06:47,675 --> 00:06:49,577
Let me have your attention,
Please!
145
00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:50,844
Now, as you all know,
146
00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:52,179
Andy'll be here
Any minute
147
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,014
So let's get
One thing straight --
148
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,916
I'm the spokesman
For the delegation.
149
00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:57,451
I do the talking.
150
00:06:57,485 --> 00:06:58,719
Well,
When he comes in,
151
00:06:58,752 --> 00:06:59,987
Is it all right if I say,
"Hello, andy"?
152
00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:02,590
No. That just
Gets you started, floyd.
153
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:05,559
I don't think you can be
That dictatorial, barney.
154
00:07:05,593 --> 00:07:08,596
Now, did we or did we not
Agree that I...?
155
00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:10,130
What if he says,
"Hey, goober"?
156
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:11,732
Can't I say,
"Hey, sheriff"?
157
00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,767
'cause he might think
I'm mad at him.
158
00:07:13,801 --> 00:07:15,503
Can't we have
A little compromise?
159
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:17,505
I think if
Anybody has
Any suggestions
160
00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:19,206
They ought
To be able
To make them.
161
00:07:19,239 --> 00:07:20,741
[ all talking ]
162
00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,109
All right.
Hold everything!
163
00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:24,044
Now, if anybody here...
164
00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:25,979
No, thanks, aunt bee.
165
00:07:26,013 --> 00:07:27,881
Well...
166
00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,216
Now, if anybody here
167
00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:31,785
Questions my ability
As a spokesman
168
00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:34,555
Then just let him or her
Step up here
169
00:07:34,588 --> 00:07:36,890
And take over
As the case may be.
170
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:38,559
Okay, I'm
The spokesman.
171
00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:39,993
Spokesman about what?
172
00:07:40,027 --> 00:07:42,095
Oh...
Hi, andy.
173
00:07:43,163 --> 00:07:45,599
What's, uh...
What's happening?
174
00:07:45,633 --> 00:07:47,034
Well, andy, this, uh...
175
00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:50,604
This here's what you might
Call a civic delegation.
176
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:53,607
As a matter of fact,
That's just what it is--
177
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:54,842
A civic delegation.
178
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,243
And I'm the spokesman.
179
00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:58,812
Hello, andy.
Oh, hi, floyd.
180
00:07:58,846 --> 00:08:00,981
Hey, sheriff.
Goober.
181
00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:03,250
Oh, hi.
Hi, everybody.
182
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:05,586
Why don't you sit down
Right there, andy?
183
00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:07,020
That's not his
Favorite chair.
184
00:08:07,054 --> 00:08:09,122
Why don't you sit here
Next to helen?
185
00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:11,124
What difference
Does it make?
186
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:12,893
He hates that chair.
187
00:08:15,796 --> 00:08:17,230
All right...
188
00:08:17,264 --> 00:08:19,166
Now, the thing is, andy
189
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:21,802
That we, as a group
Of concerned citizens
190
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:24,772
Have a proposal
About the office of sheriff.
191
00:08:24,805 --> 00:08:25,906
What we
Want to do...
192
00:08:25,939 --> 00:08:27,174
What we want to do
193
00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:29,677
Is to start
A write-in campaign
194
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:32,613
That will re-elect
Andy taylor to office.
195
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:35,816
Well... That's -- that's
Awfully nice
196
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:39,753
But barney here is the only
Official candidate.
197
00:08:39,787 --> 00:08:41,822
Oh, well, this was
Barney's idea, andy.
198
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,123
We all feel...
199
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:46,293
We all feel...
That a write-in campaign
200
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:49,563
Is the toughest kind
Of a campaign to win.
201
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:52,933
It'll be a hard, uphill fight
All the way.
202
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,602
You'll win
Easy, sheriff.
203
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:55,803
Oh, easy. Easy.
204
00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:58,038
Why, you'll
Carry this town...
205
00:08:58,071 --> 00:09:00,974
With me throwing all my support
In your direction
206
00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:02,576
I think we can make it.
207
00:09:02,610 --> 00:09:04,912
All we need is for you
To turn to us
208
00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:06,747
And say, "Men, women..."
209
00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:08,649
Whatever the case may be
210
00:09:08,682 --> 00:09:10,150
"...Full steam ahead."
211
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:12,620
[ all clapping ]
212
00:09:12,653 --> 00:09:14,622
Well, barney, that's
A pretty big sacrifice
213
00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:15,889
You're making there.
214
00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:17,691
That's how barney
Wants it, andy.
215
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,227
You'd do the same for me
Any old time.
216
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:23,196
I'll even be
Your campaign manager.
217
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,232
I, uh...
218
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:28,235
I appreciate your -- your
Coming over here like this
219
00:09:28,268 --> 00:09:31,238
And -- and if you want me to run
As a write-in
220
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,240
I'll -- I'll be happy to do it.
221
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:34,842
Oh, wonderful.
222
00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,109
All right, andy.
223
00:09:36,143 --> 00:09:38,111
We have a million things
To do, andy.
224
00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:39,713
Everybody just be quiet.
225
00:09:39,747 --> 00:09:41,114
Andy, will you please...?
226
00:09:41,148 --> 00:09:42,983
Andy, why don't you...?!
227
00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:44,652
Why don't you sit down?!
228
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:46,854
I told you he
Hates that chair.
229
00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:52,726
Oh, hello, boys.
230
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:54,194
Hello, floyd.
231
00:09:54,227 --> 00:09:55,729
Want a sucker?
232
00:09:55,763 --> 00:09:57,931
No, thanks, floyd.
I don't want a sucker.
233
00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:00,668
Now, floyd, I'm here to
Talk about the election.
234
00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:02,202
Now, as andy's
Campaign manager
235
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:04,204
I hereby appoint you
Precinct head
236
00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:05,405
Of this entire block
237
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:07,407
From main to maple,
Maple to elm
238
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,009
Elm to the fire hydrant.
239
00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:10,277
Well, precinct head.
240
00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:11,879
Well, thanks a lot, barn.
241
00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:13,080
Yeah, okay.
242
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,082
Now, the keynote
Of the whole campaign
243
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:16,950
Is gonna be --
Now get this --
244
00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:18,351
Win with taylor.
245
00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:21,088
Win with taylor.
Oh, that's good, isn't it?
246
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,823
Yeah. Oh, that's very catchy.
247
00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:24,224
It's got a nice ring to it.
248
00:10:24,257 --> 00:10:26,059
Floyd, what barney
Wants you to do
249
00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:29,062
Is just make sure that everybody
Knows about the write-in.
250
00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:31,098
Oh, andy, don't you worry.
251
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:33,233
I'm sure most folks
Know about it.
252
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,102
No, floyd.
In any write-in campaign
253
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,304
You got to have
A voter education program.
254
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:40,307
We got to go on the radio, teach
Folks how to spell taylor...
255
00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:42,242
Uh, t-a-y-l-o-r.
256
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:45,979
Say, there are not many ways
To spell taylor, you know.
257
00:10:46,013 --> 00:10:47,380
But fife, now...
258
00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:50,317
Now, fife... Oh, there's
A lot of ways to spell fife.
259
00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:51,819
There's p-h...
260
00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:53,854
And there's f-f...
261
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:55,088
Win with taylor.
262
00:10:55,122 --> 00:10:56,456
That's pretty good.
263
00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:59,927
Well, floyd, barney's name's
Already on the ballot.
264
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:02,195
You don't have to spell
His name.
265
00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:05,065
Oh. Well, you expecting
To get any votes, barney?
266
00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:07,167
Well,
Certainly I'll get some.
267
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,936
Against andy
It might not be easy.
268
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,772
Oh, barney's going to get
A lot of votes, floyd.
269
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:15,809
Well, if there's any danger
Of a trend, you let me know.
270
00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:24,985
Now, goober,
We know there's a lot of cars
271
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,720
Come in and out of here
All day.
272
00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:29,222
And if -- and if you --
And if you'd just mention
273
00:11:29,256 --> 00:11:31,424
The write-in to them,
We'd appreciate it.
274
00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:33,326
Well, I mentioned it
To some people already,
275
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:35,228
But most of them had already
Heard about it.
276
00:11:35,262 --> 00:11:36,864
I don't see no problem.
277
00:11:36,897 --> 00:11:38,966
Well, what about the ones
Who were gonna vote for me?
278
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:41,068
I didn't
Run across none.
279
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:44,504
Oh. Here.
Thank you, goober.
280
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,940
[ clears throat ]
281
00:11:46,974 --> 00:11:50,744
Well, it looks like
The campaign's going just great.
282
00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:53,146
Yeah.
Well, let's, uh...
283
00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:54,815
Yeah.
284
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:58,886
Oh, barney! Hi!
Hi, andy!
285
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:00,353
Oh, hi, thelma lou.
Oh, hi, thel.
286
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:02,355
I've been working
On your campaign, andy.
287
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:04,758
Why, thank you.
Good.
288
00:12:04,792 --> 00:12:06,193
Seems to be going
Wonderfully.
289
00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:07,961
Well...
Well, look, thel,
290
00:12:07,995 --> 00:12:10,998
Naturally we all want andy
To win by a good margin.
291
00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:12,499
Oh, don't worry.
He will.
292
00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:14,001
Even I'm voting for him.
293
00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:15,969
Why, thank you,
Thelma lou.
294
00:12:16,003 --> 00:12:19,372
Well, I've got to run now.
Good luck, sheriff.
295
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:22,109
I'll see you tonight,
Barney.
Yeah.
296
00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:34,187
Hey, barn.
Anj.
297
00:12:34,221 --> 00:12:35,555
[ both laughing ]
298
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,190
You go ahead.
No. You go ahead.
299
00:12:37,224 --> 00:12:38,792
No. You go ahead.
No. Go ahead.
300
00:12:38,826 --> 00:12:43,330
Well, uh, anj, my
Private polls indicate
301
00:12:43,363 --> 00:12:45,532
A big swing
In your direction.
302
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:46,967
Oh.
303
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,036
Well, that's, uh,
That's probably because
304
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,238
You haven't been doing
Any campaigning for yourself.
305
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,539
That could be part of it.
306
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,541
Oh, there's no question
About that.
307
00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:56,910
Well, anyway, I've,
I've been thinking
308
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:59,112
That, uh...
Well, in the interest
309
00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:01,381
Of a democratic form
Of government
310
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:04,317
I guess the people really
Ought to have a choice
311
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:05,986
Of more than one candidate.
312
00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:07,988
Oh, yeah, they should have
A choice.
313
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:10,057
It's only a matter
Of being fair to them.
314
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,458
Oh, yeah. I agree.
315
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:14,527
Actually, the way we've been
Conducting this campaign
316
00:13:14,561 --> 00:13:16,529
Is not really good
For the community.
317
00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:17,931
No, no.
No, it's not.
318
00:13:17,965 --> 00:13:20,934
And, uh, uh, well,
You know what I think?
319
00:13:20,968 --> 00:13:22,135
What?
320
00:13:22,169 --> 00:13:24,037
I think that
You ought to go out
321
00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:26,106
And stir up some votes
For yourself.
322
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:28,308
No. I mean make
A real contest out of it.
323
00:13:28,341 --> 00:13:29,576
Nothing like that
324
00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:31,912
Because I'm a taylor man
Right down the line.
325
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,180
I know that
326
00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,982
But like we were just saying
327
00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:37,250
It's not good
For the community, you know?
328
00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:40,988
And, you know, being sheriff
12 years the way I have
329
00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:43,523
I must have rubbed
Some fur the wrong way.
330
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:45,993
Well, andy, all I'm
Talking about for me
331
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:48,862
Is just a... Just a...
A token campaign.
332
00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:51,398
Oh, listen, any way you
Want to handle it's fine.
333
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:52,933
Well, just -- just a token.
334
00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,401
Just anything's okay.
335
00:13:54,434 --> 00:13:56,870
Well...
336
00:13:56,904 --> 00:13:59,006
Well, I... Better go.
337
00:13:59,039 --> 00:14:00,207
Okay.
338
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:01,474
I'll see you.
339
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:02,943
[ laughing ]
340
00:14:23,997 --> 00:14:25,632
Okay, fella, you're hired.
341
00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:37,044
What do you mean
342
00:14:37,077 --> 00:14:38,478
You don't think you
Can put up my poster?
343
00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:41,214
Oh, I never put up posters
In my window, barney.
344
00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:42,482
It spoils the decor.
345
00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:45,085
A mud slide couldn't
Spoil that decor.
346
00:14:45,118 --> 00:14:48,188
Say, it looks like you smell
Something, there, barney.
347
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:50,924
Was that what you wanted?
Smelling something?
348
00:14:50,958 --> 00:14:52,525
I'm not smelling anything.
349
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:55,195
Oh, I thought
"Bloodhound of the law..."
350
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:57,264
"Sniffing out crime," you know.
351
00:14:57,297 --> 00:14:58,531
No, nothing like that.
352
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,500
Oh, that would've been good,
Though...
353
00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:01,969
Very good.
354
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:04,371
How about a contribution
To my campaign fund?
355
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,506
Oh, no. I couldn't
Do that, barn. No.
356
00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:08,508
Why not?
Not ethical.
357
00:15:08,541 --> 00:15:10,043
I'm voting for andy.
358
00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:11,979
Look, floyd,
Your smart merchant--
359
00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:14,281
A businessman--
No matter which way he votes
360
00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:16,383
Is going to make
A nominal contribution
361
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:18,251
To both sides...
Insure himself.
362
00:15:18,285 --> 00:15:19,619
You understand?
363
00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:21,088
Oh, well...
364
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:24,057
Then, I'll give you
A nominal contribution.
365
00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:25,558
How much can I
Put you down for?
366
00:15:25,592 --> 00:15:26,960
Next time you come in
367
00:15:26,994 --> 00:15:29,096
I'll give you a haircut
For half price.
368
00:15:29,129 --> 00:15:31,698
You're all heart,
Floyd, you know that?
369
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:33,133
You're all heart.
370
00:15:55,055 --> 00:15:57,157
Now, floyd,
It's not gonna kill you
371
00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:59,659
To put up one
Of barney's posters, is it?
372
00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:01,261
What if he
Gets elected?
373
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,363
Well, that's not
The point, floyd.
374
00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:05,532
Well, that's true.
That's true.
375
00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:07,000
What is the point?
376
00:16:07,034 --> 00:16:09,269
That barney,
In spite of little things
377
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,538
Like getting carried away
With himself
378
00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,240
And going
Off the deep end
379
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:16,276
Is, underneath, a very proud
And sensitive person.
380
00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:17,544
[ brakes squeak ]
381
00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:19,312
Now here he comes.
382
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:20,713
Now, don't you say one word
383
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:23,016
About me asking you
To put up that poster.
384
00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:25,218
Oh, not a word. No, my lips
Are sealed...Sealed.
385
00:16:25,252 --> 00:16:26,619
Not a word.
386
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,325
Andy:
Oh, uh, hi, barn.
387
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:34,594
[ floyd humming ]
388
00:16:34,627 --> 00:16:36,596
[ clears throat ]
389
00:16:36,629 --> 00:16:39,599
[ continues humming ]
390
00:16:39,632 --> 00:16:41,201
Anything going on here?
391
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:43,303
I break up
A little conversation?
392
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:45,338
Oh, no,
There's nothing going on.
393
00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:47,707
Right, floyd?
No, no.
394
00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:49,109
[ humming ]
395
00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:50,743
A little campaign strategy,
Maybe?
396
00:16:50,777 --> 00:16:53,513
Like how
To sink barney fife?
397
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:54,781
What are you
Talking about?
398
00:16:54,814 --> 00:16:57,217
You think I don't know
What's been going on?
399
00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,052
You think I don't know
A conspiracy?
400
00:16:59,086 --> 00:17:00,653
Now, wait a minute.
401
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:02,355
There he goes
402
00:17:02,389 --> 00:17:04,357
Off the deep end again, andy,
Just like you said.
403
00:17:04,391 --> 00:17:05,592
Who said? Who said that?
404
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,260
My lips are sealed.
405
00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:09,062
My good friend
And worthy opponent?
406
00:17:09,096 --> 00:17:10,563
Barney, all I said...
407
00:17:10,597 --> 00:17:12,232
A little whispering campaign?
408
00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:14,634
Blacking me out on the posters
Wasn't enough?
409
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:17,070
I had nothing to do
With those posters.
410
00:17:17,104 --> 00:17:18,738
Floyd, did andy
Say anything to you
411
00:17:18,771 --> 00:17:20,340
About putting up my posters?
412
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,442
Yes.
Yes, he did.
413
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,111
Floyd!
414
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:25,412
My lips are sealed.
415
00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:27,180
Well, the whole thing's
416
00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:29,582
Coming pretty clear now,
Isn't it?
417
00:17:29,616 --> 00:17:30,617
Barney...
418
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:32,252
Okay, I'm taking the one way
419
00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:34,087
To break through
The iron curtain
420
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:35,688
To bring my case to the people.
421
00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:38,391
I'm challenging you
To a free and public debate.
422
00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:40,493
Well, what'll we debate about?
423
00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:42,562
You think I've been walking
Around here
424
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:44,397
For five years
With my eyes shut?
425
00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:47,500
Andy, you just show up,
Because I'm blowing the lid off.
426
00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:06,553
[ gavel pounding ]
427
00:18:07,487 --> 00:18:09,789
Uh, good evening.
428
00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:12,392
As you all know,
We are gathered here
429
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:14,327
For the most important event
430
00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:16,829
In the history
Of mayberry politics.
431
00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:19,566
Now, the only reason
This isn't on tv
432
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:22,202
Is because we don't have
A tv station.
433
00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:23,570
[ laughs ]
434
00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:25,872
[ stammering ]
A tv station.
435
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:30,910
Well, so much
For the lighter side.
436
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:32,479
Now, in this debate
437
00:18:32,512 --> 00:18:35,382
Between sheriff taylor
And deputy fife
438
00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:38,351
We must remember
To show no partiality.
439
00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:41,488
We must be
Completely open-minded
440
00:18:41,521 --> 00:18:44,824
In spite of the fact that andy's
The only man for the job.
441
00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:48,395
So, now I call on barney fife
To take the speaker's stand.
442
00:18:59,406 --> 00:19:00,773
Floyd.
443
00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:02,375
[ clears throat ]
444
00:19:02,409 --> 00:19:04,944
Ladies and gentlemen...
445
00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:08,648
I have here 76 documented cases
446
00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:13,186
Of malfeasance
In the sheriff's office.
447
00:19:13,220 --> 00:19:14,454
[ murmuring ]
448
00:19:16,323 --> 00:19:19,626
However,
Due to the pressures of time
449
00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:21,894
I will discuss only three.
450
00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:23,963
What a disgraceful
Tactic.
451
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:27,600
Malfeasance number one...
452
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:34,474
Traffic in this town
Is completely out of control.
453
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:37,510
Jaywalking is rampant.
454
00:19:37,544 --> 00:19:38,878
Fiddle-faddle!
455
00:19:38,911 --> 00:19:41,481
Be quiet, aunt bee.
456
00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:44,717
Malfeasance number two...
457
00:19:44,751 --> 00:19:52,492
Your sheriff has kept up...
Has n kept up with the times.
458
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:57,797
He has not properly
Equipped his office
459
00:19:57,830 --> 00:20:01,334
Like other
Law-enforcement agencies
460
00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:03,002
In this state have.
461
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,373
We have no tear gas...
462
00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:10,443
We have no submachine guns...
463
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:13,280
And as for emergency equipment
464
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:16,816
Do you know
What your sheriff carries
465
00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:19,652
In the trunk of his squad car?
466
00:20:19,686 --> 00:20:21,654
A shovel and a rake!
467
00:20:21,688 --> 00:20:24,257
Ain't you got a jack?
468
00:20:24,291 --> 00:20:27,660
Malfeasance number three...
469
00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:31,698
Are you aware that
Your sheriff
470
00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:37,003
Who is responsible
For protecting your lives
471
00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:39,739
And your property
472
00:20:39,772 --> 00:20:41,941
Carries no gun--
473
00:20:41,974 --> 00:20:46,012
No weapon
Of any description--
474
00:20:46,045 --> 00:20:51,851
To enable him to discharge
His duties properly?
475
00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:57,857
I ask you to dwell
On these things for a moment.
476
00:20:57,890 --> 00:21:01,260
Is this good government?!
477
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:06,533
Thank you.
478
00:21:08,335 --> 00:21:09,602
Andy, go on.
479
00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:11,638
You've got
To answer him.
480
00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:13,673
I don't know
What to say.
481
00:21:13,706 --> 00:21:16,042
Call him
A rabble-rouser!
482
00:21:18,545 --> 00:21:21,981
So, now let us hear
From sheriff taylor.
483
00:21:22,014 --> 00:21:24,016
[ murmuring ]
484
00:21:26,853 --> 00:21:28,888
Did you ever hear
Of such a...
485
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:36,963
76 cases of malfeasance?
486
00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:41,801
[ clearing throat ]
487
00:21:41,834 --> 00:21:44,404
Uh...
488
00:21:44,437 --> 00:21:48,641
Barney's, uh, barney's right
About the, uh, traffic.
489
00:21:48,675 --> 00:21:51,444
People do park
In the wrong places
490
00:21:51,478 --> 00:21:54,681
And cross the street
In the wrong places
491
00:21:54,714 --> 00:21:59,752
But it's-it's such a small town,
And I don't... I don't believe
492
00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:03,556
There's been an accident
Uptown here in the...
493
00:22:03,590 --> 00:22:05,458
In the last five years
494
00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:08,027
And, uh...
495
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:10,397
It is true
That we don't have
496
00:22:10,430 --> 00:22:13,433
Any, uh, emergency equipment
To speak of.
497
00:22:13,466 --> 00:22:15,902
I mean, no tear gas
Or machine guns
498
00:22:15,935 --> 00:22:17,637
Or anything like that.
499
00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:19,972
Doesn't seem to be
A need for it.
500
00:22:20,006 --> 00:22:23,776
And -- and it's true that
I don't wear a gun very often
501
00:22:23,810 --> 00:22:26,045
But, uh...
502
00:22:26,078 --> 00:22:31,050
Uh, I always thought
That we got along well enough
503
00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:33,720
That that wasn't necessary.
504
00:22:33,753 --> 00:22:36,623
Well, I, uh...
505
00:22:36,656 --> 00:22:37,890
I don't know.
506
00:22:37,924 --> 00:22:41,394
I've been sheriff
A-a long time and...
507
00:22:41,428 --> 00:22:45,898
You're either satisfied with me
Or you're -- you're not
508
00:22:45,932 --> 00:22:49,636
And, uh, I guess
We'll find out tomorrow.
509
00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:50,870
Thank you.
510
00:23:08,788 --> 00:23:10,056
Well, I, uh...
511
00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:14,026
I don't know about you folks,
But, uh...
512
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,828
[ clears throat ]
513
00:23:15,862 --> 00:23:20,500
I was satisfied
With mr. Taylor's answers
514
00:23:20,533 --> 00:23:23,069
And, uh...
515
00:23:23,102 --> 00:23:25,037
Well...
516
00:23:25,071 --> 00:23:26,873
I'm voting for andy.
517
00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:28,207
[ applause ]
518
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:30,176
Nice work.
519
00:23:33,513 --> 00:23:35,181
Thanks, barn.
520
00:23:36,783 --> 00:23:38,718
Barney...
521
00:23:38,751 --> 00:23:43,556
Man on loudspeaker:
Vote the people's choice,
Barney fife for sheriff.
522
00:23:43,590 --> 00:23:44,891
The man for the job.
523
00:23:44,924 --> 00:23:46,158
Win with fife.
524
00:23:46,192 --> 00:23:49,195
I told that guy
Just up until 9:00.
525
00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:59,739
Well, I guess I might as well
Take this down.
526
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:01,608
[ clears throat ]
527
00:24:01,641 --> 00:24:03,510
[ chuckles ]
528
00:24:05,712 --> 00:24:08,748
[ chuckles ]
529
00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:10,983
Well...Good picture.
530
00:24:11,017 --> 00:24:12,919
[ both chuckle ]
531
00:24:12,952 --> 00:24:14,854
Can I have that?
532
00:24:14,887 --> 00:24:16,523
Well, sure.
533
00:24:16,556 --> 00:24:20,259
Thanks.
534
00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:23,162
You had 100 of these.
What'd you do with them?
535
00:24:23,195 --> 00:24:25,932
Well...
[ clears throat ]
536
00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:28,568
...They cost a lot of money,
You know.
537
00:24:28,601 --> 00:24:30,603
Well, what'd you do
With them?
538
00:24:30,637 --> 00:24:32,171
Well, I...
539
00:24:32,204 --> 00:24:34,674
Well, my room needed papering,
Anyway.
540
00:24:39,912 --> 00:24:43,716
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
37922
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