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1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:05,373
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
2
00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:13,047
Starring andy griffith...
3
00:00:13,081 --> 00:00:15,183
With ronny howard...
4
00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:19,087
Also starring don knotts.
5
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:33,667
[ snoring ]
6
00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:27,288
Barn!
7
00:01:27,321 --> 00:01:28,722
Hey, barn!
8
00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:32,160
[ clears throat ]
Uh, coming, andy.
9
00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:36,597
Straightening up
Back there.
10
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,732
Yeah, it gets
Messy back there.
11
00:01:38,766 --> 00:01:40,100
Yeah.
12
00:01:44,172 --> 00:01:45,573
What?
Did you get a haircut?
13
00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:46,840
No.
14
00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:50,844
Very funny, andy.
15
00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:51,879
Very funny.
16
00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:57,551
You must have been out late
Last night, huh?
17
00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:58,852
[ yawning ]
Yeah.
18
00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:02,656
Yeah, I was, actually.
[ sighs ]
19
00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:03,691
Mm.
20
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:05,459
You go over to helen's?
21
00:02:05,493 --> 00:02:07,228
Yeah, I went over there,
22
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:10,264
But she felt like she was coming
Down with a cold or something,
23
00:02:10,298 --> 00:02:12,466
So I went on home about 8:00,
8:30, I guess.
24
00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:13,801
Oh, yeah?
25
00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,803
Boy, I bet my head
Didn't hit that pillow
26
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,205
Before a quarter of 11:00.
27
00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:19,473
Quarter to 11:00.
28
00:02:19,507 --> 00:02:21,309
Boy, I don't know
How you stand it,
29
00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:23,311
Burning the candle
At both ends that way.
30
00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:25,479
Well, these are
My salad days.
31
00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,814
What's in the mail?
32
00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:30,851
"Police officers' qualifying
This friday.
33
00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:33,421
Mt. Pilot pistol range."
34
00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:34,955
Seems like
I just qualified.
35
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:36,957
You know that was
A whole year ago?
36
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,559
Huh. Well,
No problem there.
37
00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:40,828
I just knock the spots
Right out of them.
38
00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:42,396
Yeah.
39
00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:44,465
No mail for me, I suppose.
There never is.
40
00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,300
You'd think just by the law
Of averages...
41
00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:47,501
You're sitting
On a letter.
Huh?
42
00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:50,871
You're sitting
On a letter.
43
00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:52,373
Why didn't you say so?
44
00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:53,374
I did.
45
00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:54,508
Oh.
46
00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,746
Anything interesting?
47
00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,881
[ chuckles ]
Chain letter.
48
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:01,882
Oh.
49
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,352
"Dear friend..."
Oh, yeah.
50
00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:07,521
"...This is a chain letter,
And for your own sake
51
00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:09,990
"The chain must not be broken.
52
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:13,527
"Make two copies of this letter
And send them on to friends
53
00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:15,263
"Whom you cherish.
54
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:18,532
Thus you will be blessed
With good fortune..."
55
00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:19,900
Otherwise, if you
Break the chain,
56
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,469
Something terrible
Is gonna happen.
57
00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:23,904
Yeah.
Yeah.
58
00:03:23,937 --> 00:03:26,840
I wish people would stop
Sending me these things.
59
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:27,975
Yeah, it's childish.
60
00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:29,343
It's just childish.
61
00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:30,644
Just clutters up the mail.
62
00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:31,812
Yeah.
63
00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:32,946
You got any paper?
64
00:03:32,980 --> 00:03:34,848
You going to answer
The letter?
65
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:35,916
Yeah.
66
00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:37,718
Boy, you sure are
Superstitious,
67
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,420
Believing in chain letters.
68
00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:40,688
I am not superstitious.
69
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,790
And who says I believe
In chain letters?
70
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:45,293
I just don't mess around
With them, that's all.
71
00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:46,760
That's superstition.
72
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:49,963
Now, here's where we come
To a matter of terms.
73
00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:53,667
You call it superstition.
I call it caution.
74
00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:58,972
[ clears throat ]
75
00:03:59,006 --> 00:04:00,408
Hey, barn.
76
00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:02,710
Does the number 13
Bother you?
77
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:06,547
I'm not crazy about it,
But it don't bother me.
78
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:07,948
Let me ask you something.
79
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,984
Suppose you was going to take
A trip on an airplane
80
00:04:11,018 --> 00:04:12,920
And they gave you
Seat number 13.
81
00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,622
What would you do?
82
00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:17,358
If that was the only seat,
I'd fly the next day.
83
00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:18,459
Now, there. You see?
84
00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:19,827
A few weeks ago
85
00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:22,296
You got ahold of these gypsy
Fortune-telling cards
86
00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:24,298
And lamps and you had
Opie making wishes.
87
00:04:24,332 --> 00:04:25,599
They came true,
Didn't they?
88
00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:27,568
The cards had nothing
To do with it.
89
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,603
That was just a bunch
Of coincidences.
90
00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:30,604
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
91
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:32,005
I'm just trying
To tell you
92
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:34,007
You're a very
Superstitious person.
93
00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,843
I am not a
Superstitious person!
94
00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:37,345
I'm a cautious person.
95
00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,612
My mother was cautious.
96
00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:39,813
Superstitious.
Cautious!
97
00:04:39,847 --> 00:04:41,014
Superstitious.
98
00:04:41,048 --> 00:04:43,050
Cautious, cautious,
Cautious, cautious!
99
00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:45,419
You want to see how
Superstitious I am?
100
00:04:56,063 --> 00:04:58,332
Want to go up
To the diner for lunch?
101
00:04:58,366 --> 00:04:59,433
Fine.
102
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,706
Want me to get
The letter?
103
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:06,774
No.
104
00:05:08,609 --> 00:05:09,843
Hi, floyd.
105
00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:11,379
Hey.
106
00:05:11,412 --> 00:05:12,680
Sit down.
107
00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:15,416
All right.
I got a minute.
108
00:05:15,449 --> 00:05:18,586
[ sighs ]
109
00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,788
You passed along
That letter, didn't you?
110
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,056
You didn't break
The chain, did you?
111
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:25,993
[ chuckles ]
Oh, boy.
112
00:05:26,026 --> 00:05:29,397
I might have known it was you
That sent it.
113
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,064
Are you superstitious.
114
00:05:31,098 --> 00:05:32,533
I am not superstitious.
115
00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,668
Say, what happened
To your neck there?
116
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,036
Say...
117
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,938
Now, don't make a big
Deal out of nothing.
118
00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,107
I just nicked myself
Shaving this morning
119
00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:41,975
That's all.
120
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,577
Starting already.
121
00:05:43,611 --> 00:05:46,847
My, these things work fast.
122
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,449
And your forehead,
It's kind of red.
123
00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:49,783
What'd you do, bump it?
124
00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:51,051
Yeah, I bumped it.
125
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,787
It had nothing to do
With your stupid letter.
126
00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:54,988
That's too bad.
127
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:57,991
You better not break the chain,
Barney.
128
00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:00,661
Yeah, yeah, sure.
129
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:03,964
You know what happened to me
Since I sent that letter along?
130
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,666
No. And I don't want to know.
131
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,134
The first thing this morning
132
00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,102
I had a traveling man
From raleigh.
133
00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:12,172
He was a fertilizer salesman,
And he gave me a dollar tip.
134
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,674
He did?
135
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,443
First thing this morning.
136
00:06:16,744 --> 00:06:20,881
Well, now that proves
To the hard analytical mind
137
00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,483
Exactly nothing,
138
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,552
And I'm not sending
That letter along.
139
00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:26,420
Oh, I'm sorry
To hear that.
140
00:06:26,454 --> 00:06:29,056
Some terrible things
Can happen to a man.
141
00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:30,424
Oh, terrible.
142
00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:33,894
Your neck's not bleeding
Again, is it?
143
00:06:33,927 --> 00:06:35,463
No, it's not
Bleeding again.
144
00:06:35,496 --> 00:06:36,930
Oh, I'm glad
About that.
145
00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:40,434
Floyd, let me explain something
To you once and for all.
146
00:06:40,468 --> 00:06:42,803
Now, a peace officer
Has got an image to protect
147
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,605
In this community,
And that means
148
00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:47,107
He can't be giving in
To any silly superstition.
149
00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,108
You got that?
150
00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,643
Oh, sure, barney
151
00:06:49,677 --> 00:06:52,112
But what's that got to do
With the chain letter?
152
00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:54,848
Oh, forget it, floyd.
Just forget it.
153
00:06:54,882 --> 00:06:57,551
You will be careful,
Won't you, barney?
154
00:06:58,586 --> 00:06:59,553
Hi, barney.
155
00:06:59,587 --> 00:07:00,554
Oh, hi, ope.
156
00:07:00,588 --> 00:07:01,722
Where you going,
Barney?
157
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,457
I got to pick up
The squad car.
158
00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:04,725
It's over at the station.
159
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:05,759
I'll see you.
160
00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:08,161
[ horn blares, tires screech ]
161
00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:11,164
You're on my foot!
You're on my foot!
162
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:14,101
Back it up!
Back it up!
163
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:15,736
[ gasps ]
164
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,104
Hey, barney,
You hurt?
165
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,238
Yes!
166
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,207
What's the matter
With you, norbert?
167
00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:23,143
What kind of driving
Do you call that, anyway?!
168
00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:26,780
I ought to write you a citation
For speeding, reckless driving,
169
00:07:26,814 --> 00:07:28,148
And failure to observe
An officer!
170
00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:30,183
What's the matter with you?!
171
00:07:30,217 --> 00:07:31,184
You...
172
00:07:31,218 --> 00:07:33,587
You better go back inside, ope.
173
00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:35,789
You're cramping my language.
174
00:07:35,823 --> 00:07:38,892
You know what you are,
Don't you, norbert?
175
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:40,193
Pa?
Hmm?
176
00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,796
Is there something the matter
With barney?
177
00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:44,632
What makes you ask that?
178
00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:46,166
Well, he's so jumpy,
Like.
179
00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:48,235
Floyd says he's got a curse
On him.
180
00:07:48,268 --> 00:07:51,004
Listen, I wouldn't pay
Too much attention to floyd.
181
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,674
You know, he tends to go off
The deep end a little bit.
182
00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:55,976
But barney sure acts like
He's got a curse on him.
183
00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:59,079
Well, it's not a curse.
It's not a curse.
184
00:07:59,112 --> 00:08:01,682
It's like, um...
185
00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:04,585
Well, you know like
When you're playing baseball
186
00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:07,855
And you're out in the field
And you miss a few fly balls.
187
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,290
And then you try harder,
And then you get all tensed up,
188
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,025
And then you can't catch
Anything.
189
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:13,861
Yeah, boy.
Huh.
190
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:16,930
All the time, all you need to do
Is just loosen up a little.
191
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,799
If barney sent along
That chain letter
192
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,201
And didn't break the chain,
Wouldn't that loosen him up?
193
00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:24,204
Floyd had to tell you
About that, too, did he?
194
00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,238
Now, listen.
195
00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:26,774
Barney got along just fine
196
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,709
Before there was
Any chain letter.
197
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:29,843
That's just superstition.
198
00:08:29,877 --> 00:08:31,144
And he's gonna
Have to learn
199
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:32,913
That a chain letter
Doesn't mean anything.
200
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,181
And I don't want you
Paying attention
201
00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:35,716
To a chain letter either,
You hear?
202
00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:37,117
Okay, pa.
203
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:47,928
Want me to drive?
204
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:49,963
Now I can't even drive
A car, is that it?
205
00:08:49,997 --> 00:08:52,332
You're afraid to ride
With me, is that it?
206
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:53,734
Forget I mentioned it.
207
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,869
Just in case
You're worried,
208
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,572
I won't make a move
Without you.
209
00:08:58,606 --> 00:08:59,840
Is everything clear?
210
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,975
Looks all clear to me.
211
00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:02,976
Okay to go?
212
00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:04,612
Give her the gun.
213
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:05,613
Fine.
214
00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:07,114
[ glass shatters ]
215
00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:11,619
Why don't you
Sit down?
216
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:12,820
Who can sit down?
217
00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:15,088
Don't you know
The qualifying's tomorrow?
218
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,323
Don't you know that?
219
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:18,726
I know that.
What's gonna happen then?
220
00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:20,327
Ever try to pistol-shoot
When you're jinxed?
221
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:21,929
It can't be done.
222
00:09:21,962 --> 00:09:23,931
You're just making yourself
Accident-prone.
223
00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:25,999
You think about the bad
Things that can happen
224
00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,701
Till they do.
225
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:29,803
And they're gonna keep right on
And I'm not gonna qualify
226
00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:32,039
And I'm gonna be off the force,
And it's gonna be your fault!
227
00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,173
My fault?!
228
00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:35,308
Your fault, your fault,
Your fault!
229
00:09:35,342 --> 00:09:36,576
Oh, come on!
230
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:41,815
[ sighs ]
231
00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:48,188
What are you
Going to do tonight?
232
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,823
Nothing.
Sit around in my room.
233
00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:51,191
Not much can happen there.
234
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,260
No, except you'll worry
Yourself to death.
235
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,330
Why don't you
Call up thelma lou?
236
00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:58,732
Oh, what's the use?
237
00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:01,034
Something terrible
Will probably happen.
238
00:10:01,068 --> 00:10:02,135
Oh, no, it won't.
239
00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:03,704
Call her up.
240
00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:05,372
Go over there and spend
A nice, relaxing evening.
241
00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:06,840
Pop a little popcorn.
242
00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:08,976
Play a little chinese checkers
Or something.
243
00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:10,343
Just have
A nice evening.
244
00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:14,748
I don't know.
245
00:10:14,782 --> 00:10:16,650
Oh, go on. Call her.
246
00:10:18,318 --> 00:10:20,153
You really think I should?
247
00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:24,658
Sure. Call her up,
Sit around, you know?
248
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:30,964
Okay.
249
00:10:30,998 --> 00:10:32,900
That's a time.
250
00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:37,905
Sarah, get me thelma lou,
Will you?
251
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,339
Make you feel
100% better.
252
00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,308
Yeah, maybe.
Yeah.
253
00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:45,245
How do I know where she is?
You're the phone operator.
254
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:48,982
Now, I don't mean a big evening.
Don't stay up late or anything.
255
00:10:49,016 --> 00:10:50,951
Just a nice,
Relaxing evening.
256
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:53,153
I suppose you're right.
Yeah.
257
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:56,456
Nothing like an adoring woman
To build a man up.
258
00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:57,891
Thelma lou
Certainly is that.
259
00:10:57,925 --> 00:10:58,892
Yeah.
260
00:10:58,926 --> 00:10:59,893
[ both laugh ]
261
00:10:59,927 --> 00:11:01,729
She's mad about me.
262
00:11:01,762 --> 00:11:02,896
You know...
263
00:11:02,930 --> 00:11:04,732
Oh, hi, thel.
264
00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:07,100
Big barn.
How you doing?
265
00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:08,836
[ chuckles ]
266
00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:12,840
Listen, thel, you're in for
Quite a surprise for tonight.
267
00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:14,207
You see, I...
268
00:11:14,241 --> 00:11:16,977
Well, I know tonight's
Not our regular date night.
269
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:19,012
That's what's
A surprise about it.
270
00:11:19,046 --> 00:11:20,280
[ chuckles ]
271
00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,984
Well, which is
More important-- me
272
00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:27,921
Or gluing covers back on hymn
Books with edgar coleman?
273
00:11:27,955 --> 00:11:30,490
And what about you
And edgar coleman?
274
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:31,992
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know.
275
00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:33,961
You're just gluing covers
Back on hymn books.
276
00:11:33,994 --> 00:11:35,362
Easy, barn.
Another thing --
277
00:11:35,395 --> 00:11:38,098
Just tell me this right now --
You make up your mind
278
00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,834
Whether it's going to be
Edgar coleman or barney fife,
279
00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:43,436
'cause that's just about
The situation as she exists.
280
00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:44,772
You're going to blow it.
281
00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:46,106
Which is it going to be?
282
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,141
What do you mean,
I can't talk to you that way?
283
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,510
I just did talk to you that way,
And I'll tell you this...
284
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:51,779
Hello?
285
00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:53,180
Hello?
286
00:12:02,355 --> 00:12:04,024
You know what
She just did?
287
00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,225
Hung up.
288
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:10,197
Well, that's the end
Of that.
289
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:14,067
Sweetest little girl
In the world.
290
00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:16,036
There goes the dream--
291
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:19,439
The ivy-covered cottage,
The patter of little feet...
292
00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:20,974
Pbht!
293
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:29,316
Why don't you
Call her back?
294
00:12:39,226 --> 00:12:42,796
Sarah, get me juanita
Down at the diner.
295
00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:44,331
I don't care
Whether you think
296
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:46,099
I ought to call
Juanita or not!
297
00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:47,567
Just get her!
298
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,269
Listening in again.
299
00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:53,573
Hi. Juanita?
300
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,809
Oh, hi, frank.
301
00:12:55,843 --> 00:12:58,278
Uh, she's not there, huh?
302
00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:03,016
Oh.
No message.
303
00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,523
You gonna tell me
That's not a curse?
304
00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:13,226
Well, it seems to me
305
00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:15,996
You brought a little
Of that on yourself.
306
00:13:16,029 --> 00:13:17,164
Brought it on myself?!
307
00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:19,299
With all the evidence
That's piling up
308
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:21,001
Before your very eyes?
309
00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:23,871
Boy, you sure are getting
Yourself in a fine state
310
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,839
For the pistol
Qualifying tomorrow.
311
00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,174
Tomorrow?
312
00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:29,509
For a man in my position,
There is no tomorrow!
313
00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:32,412
Where you going?
314
00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:35,916
Swept into the dustbin
Of history.
315
00:13:35,949 --> 00:13:38,218
Exit barney fife.
316
00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:44,591
You worried
About barney, pa?
317
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,359
No, I'm not worried
About him.
318
00:13:46,393 --> 00:13:48,095
He can take care
Of himself.
319
00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:50,163
I just wonder where he is
Is all.
320
00:13:50,197 --> 00:13:51,564
Hmm.
321
00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:55,268
He's not at the courthouse,
Not at the diner.
322
00:13:55,302 --> 00:13:57,170
His landlady
Hasn't seen him.
323
00:13:57,204 --> 00:13:58,571
Floyd hasn't seen him.
324
00:13:58,605 --> 00:14:00,573
I just don't know
Where he got to.
325
00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:02,442
Out practicing
With his gun?
326
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:04,411
No.
We'd have heard that.
327
00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,445
Hmm.
328
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:10,183
What you do
When you're looking for somebody
329
00:14:10,217 --> 00:14:12,319
Is you put yourself
In his position.
330
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:14,654
Then you think
Like he does.
331
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:18,291
Trouble is, I can't think
Like barney does.
332
00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:19,592
Mm-hmm.
333
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,099
Ope.
334
00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,200
Yeah, pa.
335
00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:29,970
Suppose you was
In barney's place.
336
00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:31,238
What would you do?
337
00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:34,407
I think I'd go out to the dump
338
00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:36,543
And...And look
For that chain letter.
339
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,688
Hey, barn.
340
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:49,689
[ gasps ]
341
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:50,690
How you doing?
342
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:51,925
Oh, hi, andy.
343
00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,693
I was just checking
The dump.
344
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,428
Good.
345
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:58,698
They ought to start burning
This stuff pretty soon.
346
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,533
Yeah. Well, we've had
Some complaints.
347
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:02,269
They're getting
The drift of it
348
00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:03,703
In the northern part
Of town.
349
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,438
I wouldn't be surprised.
350
00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:07,307
Should have brought
My pistol.
351
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:08,575
Knock off a few rats.
352
00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:09,909
Yeah.
353
00:15:11,344 --> 00:15:12,712
Well, uh...
354
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:15,983
Say, what are you doing
Out here anyway?
355
00:15:16,016 --> 00:15:18,251
I came to help you
Look for the letter.
356
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:23,690
Well...
Thanks, but I'm...
357
00:15:23,723 --> 00:15:26,693
Afraid it's like looking
For a needle in a haystack.
358
00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:28,195
Aw, come on.
359
00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:30,697
There's a lot of stuff here.
360
00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:32,165
Look at that.
361
00:15:32,199 --> 00:15:36,303
Old buzzy leonard's car.
362
00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:39,472
Dave burress' stuff.
363
00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:41,308
Ah.
364
00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:42,542
Hey.
Hey, here's a letter.
365
00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:44,377
What? Where?
366
00:15:44,411 --> 00:15:47,447
I didn't know herbert swindell
Was such a romantic type.
367
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,582
Oh.
[ laughs ]
368
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:52,352
Miss hudgens'
Grocery list.
369
00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:54,421
Pies, cakes, cookies.
370
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:57,390
She always claimed her weight
Was a glandular condition.
371
00:15:57,424 --> 00:15:59,026
Well, she's got
Very fat glands.
372
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,427
Yeah.
373
00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,996
That's--well...
374
00:16:03,030 --> 00:16:04,631
Uh-oh.
375
00:16:04,664 --> 00:16:06,166
What's this?
376
00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:09,536
Now, who would take a magazine
Like this?
377
00:16:09,569 --> 00:16:14,541
Why, that young lady ought to be
Ashamed of herself.
378
00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,143
Now, who took--
379
00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:17,644
Barney!
380
00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,313
I subscribe to that magazine.
You see-- [ clears throat ]
381
00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:22,382
This fella was working
His way through college,
382
00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:24,084
And I thought
I'd give him a break.
383
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,518
He ought to be
Doing right well.
384
00:16:25,552 --> 00:16:27,687
There's some interesting
Articles in that magazine --
385
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:29,322
And by some real
Famous authors, too.
386
00:16:29,356 --> 00:16:30,457
Like who?
387
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,325
Well...Uh...
388
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:36,529
I can't think of one offhand,
But what issue is that?
389
00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:39,532
January.
390
00:16:39,566 --> 00:16:41,534
Quite a month, huh?
391
00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:43,603
The photography in there
Is excellent.
392
00:16:43,636 --> 00:16:46,206
I mean, look at the ribbon
On her foot there.
393
00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:47,640
The detail is just perfect.
394
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:49,376
Probably used a very fast lens.
395
00:16:49,409 --> 00:16:51,678
Yeah, yeah, I'd say
That's a fast lens.
396
00:16:51,711 --> 00:16:53,513
Just forget
About the magazine.
397
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,382
I mean, my whole career
As a deputy
398
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:57,050
Is just hanging
By a thread.
399
00:16:57,084 --> 00:16:58,451
Pretty good,
Though, huh?
400
00:16:58,485 --> 00:17:00,320
Yeah, well...
401
00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:03,056
[ chuckles ]
402
00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:04,591
Well, want to look
Some more?
403
00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:05,725
What's the use?
404
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:07,627
Couldn't find it
In a million years
405
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,129
And what do you care?
406
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:11,498
Most valuable letter
To come into a man's life,
407
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,333
And you tell him
To throw it away.
408
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:14,601
Why don't you go to bed?
409
00:17:14,634 --> 00:17:16,469
Yeah, I think I will.
410
00:17:16,503 --> 00:17:19,472
A lot of good it'll do,
But I am.
411
00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:22,242
There.
Look what you made me do.
412
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:28,615
Morning, barn.
413
00:17:28,648 --> 00:17:29,616
Morning, ange.
414
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:30,617
Hey, barn.
415
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:31,618
Hi, goober.
416
00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,220
Get any sleep last night?
417
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:34,487
Not a wink.
Not a wink.
418
00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:36,756
You know what the matter
With you is, barn?
419
00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:38,358
You think too much.
420
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,760
Makes a feller very nervous
When he thinks too much.
421
00:17:40,793 --> 00:17:42,729
Thanks for the
Tip, goober.
422
00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:47,300
Oh, barn...
423
00:17:47,334 --> 00:17:50,170
That's not all
Goober's got for you.
424
00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:51,438
Right, goober?
425
00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:52,605
Yo.
426
00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:53,640
What are you talking about?
427
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,342
Well, I just
Got to thinking.
428
00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:57,577
Since floyd sent you
A copy of the letter,
429
00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:00,413
He must have sent a copy
To somebody else, right?
430
00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:02,849
Why didn't I think of that?
431
00:18:02,882 --> 00:18:06,519
Goober's brought you
His copy, right, goober?
432
00:18:06,553 --> 00:18:09,189
Here you are, barn.
433
00:18:09,222 --> 00:18:10,457
I sent my two copies on.
434
00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,825
One to gomer in the marines,
One to aunt flo.
435
00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:15,595
I had real good luck
Since I sent on them letters.
436
00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:17,264
Three flats tires this week.
437
00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,866
Ain't had a big flat-tire week
Like that all year.
438
00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:21,734
Thanks, goober.
439
00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:24,737
Goob, it was nice of you
To bring the letter over here.
440
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:26,339
We sure appreciate it.
441
00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:29,342
Aw, I'm always ready
To help a feller out in trouble.
442
00:18:29,376 --> 00:18:31,478
Well, it was mighty nice
Of you, goob.
443
00:18:31,511 --> 00:18:32,745
Yeah, it was nice.
444
00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:33,746
Thanks, goober.
445
00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:35,215
You welcome.
446
00:18:36,516 --> 00:18:39,219
Well, we'll, uh,
We'll, we'll see you, goob.
447
00:18:39,252 --> 00:18:41,321
Okay.
See ya, andy.
448
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:42,689
[ clicks tongue ]
449
00:18:46,926 --> 00:18:49,462
I think it was mighty nice
Of goober
450
00:18:49,496 --> 00:18:51,198
To come
All the way over here
451
00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:53,333
And bring you that letter,
Don't you?
452
00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:00,607
What did you mean by that?
453
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,610
Nothing. I just think
It was nice of goober
454
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,879
To come all the way over here
And bring you that letter.
455
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:14,221
You could have brought it over
Here yourself, couldn't you?
456
00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,488
Goober didn't mind.
457
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,528
I think I know why you had
Goober bring it over.
458
00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:23,630
You're trying to show me
459
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,798
That it's only
The non-intellectual types
460
00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:28,701
Like goober and floyd that go in
For this sort of thing.
461
00:19:28,735 --> 00:19:31,504
Well, barney,
That's entirely up to you.
462
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:32,772
It means nothing to you
463
00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:34,941
That I'm afraid to walk
Out of the house,
464
00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:36,376
That I've lost thelma lou,
465
00:19:36,409 --> 00:19:38,411
That I'm about to lose
Out as a deputy.
466
00:19:38,445 --> 00:19:39,412
That means nothing?
467
00:19:39,446 --> 00:19:40,647
It means something,
468
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,682
But I don't think
A jinx is behind it, no.
469
00:19:42,715 --> 00:19:44,417
And if I send
These copies on,
470
00:19:44,451 --> 00:19:46,553
Then that means I've
Given in to superstition.
471
00:19:46,586 --> 00:19:49,356
I'm going to have that
On my back the rest of my life.
472
00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:50,623
Why don't you say it?
473
00:19:50,657 --> 00:19:51,724
You just said it.
474
00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:56,996
Do you have any idea
How hard it is
475
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:59,999
To work with somebody that
Thinks he knows everything?
476
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:03,736
Barney, why don't you do
Whatever you think is best?
477
00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:06,339
No, no. It was your idea to
Throw the letter away.
478
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,875
It was your idea to bring
Goober over here with it.
479
00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:11,344
So you decide whether
To send it on or not.
480
00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:13,313
There's the letter!
Now, you decide!
481
00:20:13,346 --> 00:20:14,881
Whichever it is,
Don't tell me!
482
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,483
I don't want to know!
483
00:20:16,516 --> 00:20:18,885
I'll wait for you
Out in the squad car.
484
00:20:18,918 --> 00:20:20,887
You work with a person
Long enough,
485
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,822
You get as goofy as he is.
486
00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:25,892
[ clears throat ]
487
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,896
Sarah.
488
00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:32,365
Fine. How are you?
489
00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:34,301
Well...
490
00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,502
Soak it, sarah.
491
00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:37,770
Soak it a lot
In warm salt water.
492
00:20:37,804 --> 00:20:42,241
Listen, sarah,
Get me thelma lou, will you?
493
00:20:43,543 --> 00:20:46,513
I know she's barney's girl.
494
00:20:46,546 --> 00:20:48,281
Because I don't want to.
495
00:20:48,315 --> 00:20:50,049
I-I don't want to talk
To juanita.
496
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,251
Now, get me thelma lou.
497
00:20:55,722 --> 00:20:58,358
You going to send it?
I don't want to know.
498
00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:06,899
Now, there's nothing to be
Nervous about, barney.
499
00:21:06,933 --> 00:21:08,435
Nervous?
Who's nervous?
500
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:10,803
Did you mail them letters?
I don't want to know.
501
00:21:10,837 --> 00:21:13,406
Why don't you practice
A little while you wait?
502
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:14,907
Oh, that won't do
No good.
503
00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,943
Just draw and aim
Right over that way.
504
00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:18,678
Draw and aim.
Draw and aim.
505
00:21:18,711 --> 00:21:20,079
[ gunshot ]
506
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:21,414
Are you hurt?
507
00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:22,715
You didn't mail them,
Did you?
508
00:21:22,749 --> 00:21:26,619
Barney, you got to try
To control your nerves.
509
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:29,088
You still don't understand,
Do you?!
510
00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:30,557
It's out of my hands.
511
00:21:30,590 --> 00:21:32,525
Oh, come on.
512
00:21:32,559 --> 00:21:33,793
Hey, look who's coming.
513
00:21:33,826 --> 00:21:34,994
Hi, thelma lou.
514
00:21:35,027 --> 00:21:36,329
Thelma lou?
515
00:21:36,363 --> 00:21:38,731
I just came over
To see my man shoot.
516
00:21:38,765 --> 00:21:40,433
Isn't that a
Nice surprise?
517
00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:43,836
Well, I...Got this
Sort of head cold, thelma lou.
518
00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:46,105
I know you're going to do
Wonderfully, barney.
519
00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,507
Course he will.
520
00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:48,775
Well, I...
[ clears throat ]
521
00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,577
I do better
At moving targets
522
00:21:50,610 --> 00:21:53,913
You know, like fleeing bank
Robbers and things like that.
523
00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:56,949
You know, I never have
Seen you shoot, barney,
524
00:21:56,983 --> 00:21:58,985
And it's such
A masculine thing.
525
00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:03,122
Well, the main thing about a gun
526
00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:05,725
Is you never point this baby
At anything
527
00:22:05,758 --> 00:22:07,093
Unless you aim to kill.
528
00:22:07,126 --> 00:22:09,596
Unless you're shooting
At a target, of course.
529
00:22:17,069 --> 00:22:18,070
I hit it.
530
00:22:18,104 --> 00:22:19,539
Good, barn.
Good, good.
531
00:22:19,572 --> 00:22:21,007
Oh, do it again,
Barney!
532
00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:34,621
Well, you sure
Did it, barn.
533
00:22:34,654 --> 00:22:35,888
You sure did it.
534
00:22:35,922 --> 00:22:37,624
Oh, that was marvelous,
Barney.
535
00:22:37,657 --> 00:22:39,626
[ laughing ]
Oh, well...
536
00:22:41,528 --> 00:22:42,829
Well, all it takes
537
00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:44,697
Is a keen eye
And a steady hand.
538
00:22:44,731 --> 00:22:46,566
I guess I was born
With them.
539
00:22:46,599 --> 00:22:48,034
Well, the main
Thing is
540
00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:49,636
You did it
All by yourself.
541
00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:50,637
What's that?
542
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:51,871
Oh, nothing.
543
00:22:51,904 --> 00:22:53,906
Just a good-luck charm
Barney didn't need.
544
00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:55,842
I always feel good
545
00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:58,611
When I can strike a blow
Against superstition.
546
00:22:58,645 --> 00:23:00,580
You got a little, uh,
Lipstick...
547
00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:02,649
Oh.
[ laughs ]
548
00:23:02,682 --> 00:23:04,417
Yeah.
549
00:23:10,823 --> 00:23:12,792
I believe you dropped
Your rabbit's foot.
550
00:23:12,825 --> 00:23:14,461
It's a key chain.
551
00:23:14,494 --> 00:23:16,563
I just forgot the keys
That go with it.
552
00:23:16,596 --> 00:23:17,764
Here's your
Four-leaf clover.
553
00:23:17,797 --> 00:23:19,165
Four-leaf clover?
554
00:23:19,198 --> 00:23:21,534
Yeah, it's a four leaf clover.
Can't you see?
555
00:23:21,568 --> 00:23:23,803
And don't start on that
Superstition thing again.
556
00:23:23,836 --> 00:23:26,105
It's caution, just caution!
557
00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:37,016
Hi, barn.
558
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:38,217
Floyd.
559
00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:39,952
Morning, andy.
Wonderful morning.
560
00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:41,220
Yeah.
561
00:23:41,253 --> 00:23:42,789
What you trying to hide there,
Barn?
562
00:23:42,822 --> 00:23:45,625
Oh, I wasn't hiding anything.
I was...
563
00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:47,193
Well, if you must know,
564
00:23:47,226 --> 00:23:49,862
I'm gonna send out these copies
Of that lucky letter.
565
00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:50,863
You're kidding.
566
00:23:50,897 --> 00:23:53,032
A wise thing to do, andy.
567
00:23:53,065 --> 00:23:54,133
Can't do any harm, can it?
568
00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,702
That's right.
What harm can it do?
569
00:23:55,735 --> 00:23:57,103
But you already qualified,
570
00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:59,071
And you got thelma lou back
And everything.
571
00:23:59,105 --> 00:24:00,840
You did it on your own
Without those.
572
00:24:00,873 --> 00:24:02,842
Look, I got by without it,
Didn't I?
573
00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:04,544
So now I'll get by
With it.
574
00:24:04,577 --> 00:24:06,913
You beat everything.
You beat everything.
575
00:24:06,946 --> 00:24:08,615
I'm gonna drop these
In the box.
576
00:24:08,648 --> 00:24:09,616
Mm.
577
00:24:09,649 --> 00:24:11,217
[ chuckles ]
578
00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:13,853
Hot stuff.
Hot stuff.
579
00:24:20,059 --> 00:24:22,094
[ horn blares, tires screech ]
580
00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:24,964
Barney: you're on my foot!
You're on my foot!
581
00:24:24,997 --> 00:24:27,233
Back it up!
Back it up!
582
00:24:27,266 --> 00:24:29,569
What's happened, andy?
What's happened?
583
00:24:29,602 --> 00:24:32,038
Oh, nothing much.
584
00:24:32,071 --> 00:24:35,174
I guess barney's
Just plain unlucky.
585
00:24:40,246 --> 00:24:43,482
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
40418
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