All language subtitles for The Andy Griffith Show S05E19 The Lucky Letter 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 2 0 x264-TrollHD (1)_track4_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:05,373 [ whistling sprightly tune ] 2 00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:13,047 Starring andy griffith... 3 00:00:13,081 --> 00:00:15,183 With ronny howard... 4 00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:19,087 Also starring don knotts. 5 00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:33,667 [ snoring ] 6 00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:27,288 Barn! 7 00:01:27,321 --> 00:01:28,722 Hey, barn! 8 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:32,160 [ clears throat ] Uh, coming, andy. 9 00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:36,597 Straightening up Back there. 10 00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,732 Yeah, it gets Messy back there. 11 00:01:38,766 --> 00:01:40,100 Yeah. 12 00:01:44,172 --> 00:01:45,573 What? Did you get a haircut? 13 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:46,840 No. 14 00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:50,844 Very funny, andy. 15 00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:51,879 Very funny. 16 00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:57,551 You must have been out late Last night, huh? 17 00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:58,852 [ yawning ] Yeah. 18 00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:02,656 Yeah, I was, actually. [ sighs ] 19 00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:03,691 Mm. 20 00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:05,459 You go over to helen's? 21 00:02:05,493 --> 00:02:07,228 Yeah, I went over there, 22 00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:10,264 But she felt like she was coming Down with a cold or something, 23 00:02:10,298 --> 00:02:12,466 So I went on home about 8:00, 8:30, I guess. 24 00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:13,801 Oh, yeah? 25 00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,803 Boy, I bet my head Didn't hit that pillow 26 00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,205 Before a quarter of 11:00. 27 00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:19,473 Quarter to 11:00. 28 00:02:19,507 --> 00:02:21,309 Boy, I don't know How you stand it, 29 00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:23,311 Burning the candle At both ends that way. 30 00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:25,479 Well, these are My salad days. 31 00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,814 What's in the mail? 32 00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:30,851 "Police officers' qualifying This friday. 33 00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:33,421 Mt. Pilot pistol range." 34 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:34,955 Seems like I just qualified. 35 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:36,957 You know that was A whole year ago? 36 00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,559 Huh. Well, No problem there. 37 00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:40,828 I just knock the spots Right out of them. 38 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:42,396 Yeah. 39 00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:44,465 No mail for me, I suppose. There never is. 40 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,300 You'd think just by the law Of averages... 41 00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:47,501 You're sitting On a letter. Huh? 42 00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:50,871 You're sitting On a letter. 43 00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:52,373 Why didn't you say so? 44 00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:53,374 I did. 45 00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:54,508 Oh. 46 00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,746 Anything interesting? 47 00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,881 [ chuckles ] Chain letter. 48 00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:01,882 Oh. 49 00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,352 "Dear friend..." Oh, yeah. 50 00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:07,521 "...This is a chain letter, And for your own sake 51 00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:09,990 "The chain must not be broken. 52 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:13,527 "Make two copies of this letter And send them on to friends 53 00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:15,263 "Whom you cherish. 54 00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:18,532 Thus you will be blessed With good fortune..." 55 00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:19,900 Otherwise, if you Break the chain, 56 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,469 Something terrible Is gonna happen. 57 00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:23,904 Yeah. Yeah. 58 00:03:23,937 --> 00:03:26,840 I wish people would stop Sending me these things. 59 00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:27,975 Yeah, it's childish. 60 00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:29,343 It's just childish. 61 00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:30,644 Just clutters up the mail. 62 00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:31,812 Yeah. 63 00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:32,946 You got any paper? 64 00:03:32,980 --> 00:03:34,848 You going to answer The letter? 65 00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:35,916 Yeah. 66 00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:37,718 Boy, you sure are Superstitious, 67 00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,420 Believing in chain letters. 68 00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:40,688 I am not superstitious. 69 00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,790 And who says I believe In chain letters? 70 00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:45,293 I just don't mess around With them, that's all. 71 00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:46,760 That's superstition. 72 00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:49,963 Now, here's where we come To a matter of terms. 73 00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:53,667 You call it superstition. I call it caution. 74 00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:58,972 [ clears throat ] 75 00:03:59,006 --> 00:04:00,408 Hey, barn. 76 00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:02,710 Does the number 13 Bother you? 77 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:06,547 I'm not crazy about it, But it don't bother me. 78 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:07,948 Let me ask you something. 79 00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,984 Suppose you was going to take A trip on an airplane 80 00:04:11,018 --> 00:04:12,920 And they gave you Seat number 13. 81 00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,622 What would you do? 82 00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:17,358 If that was the only seat, I'd fly the next day. 83 00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:18,459 Now, there. You see? 84 00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:19,827 A few weeks ago 85 00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:22,296 You got ahold of these gypsy Fortune-telling cards 86 00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:24,298 And lamps and you had Opie making wishes. 87 00:04:24,332 --> 00:04:25,599 They came true, Didn't they? 88 00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:27,568 The cards had nothing To do with it. 89 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,603 That was just a bunch Of coincidences. 90 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:30,604 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 91 00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:32,005 I'm just trying To tell you 92 00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:34,007 You're a very Superstitious person. 93 00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,843 I am not a Superstitious person! 94 00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:37,345 I'm a cautious person. 95 00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,612 My mother was cautious. 96 00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:39,813 Superstitious. Cautious! 97 00:04:39,847 --> 00:04:41,014 Superstitious. 98 00:04:41,048 --> 00:04:43,050 Cautious, cautious, Cautious, cautious! 99 00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:45,419 You want to see how Superstitious I am? 100 00:04:56,063 --> 00:04:58,332 Want to go up To the diner for lunch? 101 00:04:58,366 --> 00:04:59,433 Fine. 102 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,706 Want me to get The letter? 103 00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:06,774 No. 104 00:05:08,609 --> 00:05:09,843 Hi, floyd. 105 00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:11,379 Hey. 106 00:05:11,412 --> 00:05:12,680 Sit down. 107 00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:15,416 All right. I got a minute. 108 00:05:15,449 --> 00:05:18,586 [ sighs ] 109 00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,788 You passed along That letter, didn't you? 110 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,056 You didn't break The chain, did you? 111 00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:25,993 [ chuckles ] Oh, boy. 112 00:05:26,026 --> 00:05:29,397 I might have known it was you That sent it. 113 00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,064 Are you superstitious. 114 00:05:31,098 --> 00:05:32,533 I am not superstitious. 115 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,668 Say, what happened To your neck there? 116 00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,036 Say... 117 00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,938 Now, don't make a big Deal out of nothing. 118 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,107 I just nicked myself Shaving this morning 119 00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:41,975 That's all. 120 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,577 Starting already. 121 00:05:43,611 --> 00:05:46,847 My, these things work fast. 122 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,449 And your forehead, It's kind of red. 123 00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:49,783 What'd you do, bump it? 124 00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:51,051 Yeah, I bumped it. 125 00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,787 It had nothing to do With your stupid letter. 126 00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:54,988 That's too bad. 127 00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:57,991 You better not break the chain, Barney. 128 00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:00,661 Yeah, yeah, sure. 129 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:03,964 You know what happened to me Since I sent that letter along? 130 00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,666 No. And I don't want to know. 131 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,134 The first thing this morning 132 00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,102 I had a traveling man From raleigh. 133 00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:12,172 He was a fertilizer salesman, And he gave me a dollar tip. 134 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,674 He did? 135 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,443 First thing this morning. 136 00:06:16,744 --> 00:06:20,881 Well, now that proves To the hard analytical mind 137 00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,483 Exactly nothing, 138 00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,552 And I'm not sending That letter along. 139 00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:26,420 Oh, I'm sorry To hear that. 140 00:06:26,454 --> 00:06:29,056 Some terrible things Can happen to a man. 141 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:30,424 Oh, terrible. 142 00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:33,894 Your neck's not bleeding Again, is it? 143 00:06:33,927 --> 00:06:35,463 No, it's not Bleeding again. 144 00:06:35,496 --> 00:06:36,930 Oh, I'm glad About that. 145 00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:40,434 Floyd, let me explain something To you once and for all. 146 00:06:40,468 --> 00:06:42,803 Now, a peace officer Has got an image to protect 147 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,605 In this community, And that means 148 00:06:44,638 --> 00:06:47,107 He can't be giving in To any silly superstition. 149 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,108 You got that? 150 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,643 Oh, sure, barney 151 00:06:49,677 --> 00:06:52,112 But what's that got to do With the chain letter? 152 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:54,848 Oh, forget it, floyd. Just forget it. 153 00:06:54,882 --> 00:06:57,551 You will be careful, Won't you, barney? 154 00:06:58,586 --> 00:06:59,553 Hi, barney. 155 00:06:59,587 --> 00:07:00,554 Oh, hi, ope. 156 00:07:00,588 --> 00:07:01,722 Where you going, Barney? 157 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,457 I got to pick up The squad car. 158 00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:04,725 It's over at the station. 159 00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:05,759 I'll see you. 160 00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:08,161 [ horn blares, tires screech ] 161 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:11,164 You're on my foot! You're on my foot! 162 00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:14,101 Back it up! Back it up! 163 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:15,736 [ gasps ] 164 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,104 Hey, barney, You hurt? 165 00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,238 Yes! 166 00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,207 What's the matter With you, norbert? 167 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:23,143 What kind of driving Do you call that, anyway?! 168 00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:26,780 I ought to write you a citation For speeding, reckless driving, 169 00:07:26,814 --> 00:07:28,148 And failure to observe An officer! 170 00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:30,183 What's the matter with you?! 171 00:07:30,217 --> 00:07:31,184 You... 172 00:07:31,218 --> 00:07:33,587 You better go back inside, ope. 173 00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:35,789 You're cramping my language. 174 00:07:35,823 --> 00:07:38,892 You know what you are, Don't you, norbert? 175 00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:40,193 Pa? Hmm? 176 00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,796 Is there something the matter With barney? 177 00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:44,632 What makes you ask that? 178 00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:46,166 Well, he's so jumpy, Like. 179 00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:48,235 Floyd says he's got a curse On him. 180 00:07:48,268 --> 00:07:51,004 Listen, I wouldn't pay Too much attention to floyd. 181 00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,674 You know, he tends to go off The deep end a little bit. 182 00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:55,976 But barney sure acts like He's got a curse on him. 183 00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:59,079 Well, it's not a curse. It's not a curse. 184 00:07:59,112 --> 00:08:01,682 It's like, um... 185 00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:04,585 Well, you know like When you're playing baseball 186 00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:07,855 And you're out in the field And you miss a few fly balls. 187 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,290 And then you try harder, And then you get all tensed up, 188 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,025 And then you can't catch Anything. 189 00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:13,861 Yeah, boy. Huh. 190 00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:16,930 All the time, all you need to do Is just loosen up a little. 191 00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,799 If barney sent along That chain letter 192 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,201 And didn't break the chain, Wouldn't that loosen him up? 193 00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:24,204 Floyd had to tell you About that, too, did he? 194 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,238 Now, listen. 195 00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:26,774 Barney got along just fine 196 00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,709 Before there was Any chain letter. 197 00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:29,843 That's just superstition. 198 00:08:29,877 --> 00:08:31,144 And he's gonna Have to learn 199 00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:32,913 That a chain letter Doesn't mean anything. 200 00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,181 And I don't want you Paying attention 201 00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:35,716 To a chain letter either, You hear? 202 00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:37,117 Okay, pa. 203 00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:47,928 Want me to drive? 204 00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:49,963 Now I can't even drive A car, is that it? 205 00:08:49,997 --> 00:08:52,332 You're afraid to ride With me, is that it? 206 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:53,734 Forget I mentioned it. 207 00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,869 Just in case You're worried, 208 00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,572 I won't make a move Without you. 209 00:08:58,606 --> 00:08:59,840 Is everything clear? 210 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,975 Looks all clear to me. 211 00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:02,976 Okay to go? 212 00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:04,612 Give her the gun. 213 00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:05,613 Fine. 214 00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:07,114 [ glass shatters ] 215 00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:11,619 Why don't you Sit down? 216 00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:12,820 Who can sit down? 217 00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:15,088 Don't you know The qualifying's tomorrow? 218 00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,323 Don't you know that? 219 00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:18,726 I know that. What's gonna happen then? 220 00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:20,327 Ever try to pistol-shoot When you're jinxed? 221 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:21,929 It can't be done. 222 00:09:21,962 --> 00:09:23,931 You're just making yourself Accident-prone. 223 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:25,999 You think about the bad Things that can happen 224 00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,701 Till they do. 225 00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:29,803 And they're gonna keep right on And I'm not gonna qualify 226 00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:32,039 And I'm gonna be off the force, And it's gonna be your fault! 227 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,173 My fault?! 228 00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:35,308 Your fault, your fault, Your fault! 229 00:09:35,342 --> 00:09:36,576 Oh, come on! 230 00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:41,815 [ sighs ] 231 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:48,188 What are you Going to do tonight? 232 00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,823 Nothing. Sit around in my room. 233 00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:51,191 Not much can happen there. 234 00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,260 No, except you'll worry Yourself to death. 235 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,330 Why don't you Call up thelma lou? 236 00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:58,732 Oh, what's the use? 237 00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:01,034 Something terrible Will probably happen. 238 00:10:01,068 --> 00:10:02,135 Oh, no, it won't. 239 00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:03,704 Call her up. 240 00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:05,372 Go over there and spend A nice, relaxing evening. 241 00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:06,840 Pop a little popcorn. 242 00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:08,976 Play a little chinese checkers Or something. 243 00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:10,343 Just have A nice evening. 244 00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:14,748 I don't know. 245 00:10:14,782 --> 00:10:16,650 Oh, go on. Call her. 246 00:10:18,318 --> 00:10:20,153 You really think I should? 247 00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:24,658 Sure. Call her up, Sit around, you know? 248 00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:30,964 Okay. 249 00:10:30,998 --> 00:10:32,900 That's a time. 250 00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:37,905 Sarah, get me thelma lou, Will you? 251 00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,339 Make you feel 100% better. 252 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,308 Yeah, maybe. Yeah. 253 00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:45,245 How do I know where she is? You're the phone operator. 254 00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:48,982 Now, I don't mean a big evening. Don't stay up late or anything. 255 00:10:49,016 --> 00:10:50,951 Just a nice, Relaxing evening. 256 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:53,153 I suppose you're right. Yeah. 257 00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:56,456 Nothing like an adoring woman To build a man up. 258 00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:57,891 Thelma lou Certainly is that. 259 00:10:57,925 --> 00:10:58,892 Yeah. 260 00:10:58,926 --> 00:10:59,893 [ both laugh ] 261 00:10:59,927 --> 00:11:01,729 She's mad about me. 262 00:11:01,762 --> 00:11:02,896 You know... 263 00:11:02,930 --> 00:11:04,732 Oh, hi, thel. 264 00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:07,100 Big barn. How you doing? 265 00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:08,836 [ chuckles ] 266 00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:12,840 Listen, thel, you're in for Quite a surprise for tonight. 267 00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:14,207 You see, I... 268 00:11:14,241 --> 00:11:16,977 Well, I know tonight's Not our regular date night. 269 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:19,012 That's what's A surprise about it. 270 00:11:19,046 --> 00:11:20,280 [ chuckles ] 271 00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,984 Well, which is More important-- me 272 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:27,921 Or gluing covers back on hymn Books with edgar coleman? 273 00:11:27,955 --> 00:11:30,490 And what about you And edgar coleman? 274 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:31,992 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. 275 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:33,961 You're just gluing covers Back on hymn books. 276 00:11:33,994 --> 00:11:35,362 Easy, barn. Another thing -- 277 00:11:35,395 --> 00:11:38,098 Just tell me this right now -- You make up your mind 278 00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,834 Whether it's going to be Edgar coleman or barney fife, 279 00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:43,436 'cause that's just about The situation as she exists. 280 00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:44,772 You're going to blow it. 281 00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:46,106 Which is it going to be? 282 00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,141 What do you mean, I can't talk to you that way? 283 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,510 I just did talk to you that way, And I'll tell you this... 284 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:51,779 Hello? 285 00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:53,180 Hello? 286 00:12:02,355 --> 00:12:04,024 You know what She just did? 287 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,225 Hung up. 288 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:10,197 Well, that's the end Of that. 289 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:14,067 Sweetest little girl In the world. 290 00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:16,036 There goes the dream-- 291 00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:19,439 The ivy-covered cottage, The patter of little feet... 292 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:20,974 Pbht! 293 00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:29,316 Why don't you Call her back? 294 00:12:39,226 --> 00:12:42,796 Sarah, get me juanita Down at the diner. 295 00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:44,331 I don't care Whether you think 296 00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:46,099 I ought to call Juanita or not! 297 00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:47,567 Just get her! 298 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,269 Listening in again. 299 00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:53,573 Hi. Juanita? 300 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,809 Oh, hi, frank. 301 00:12:55,843 --> 00:12:58,278 Uh, she's not there, huh? 302 00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:03,016 Oh. No message. 303 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,523 You gonna tell me That's not a curse? 304 00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:13,226 Well, it seems to me 305 00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:15,996 You brought a little Of that on yourself. 306 00:13:16,029 --> 00:13:17,164 Brought it on myself?! 307 00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:19,299 With all the evidence That's piling up 308 00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:21,001 Before your very eyes? 309 00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:23,871 Boy, you sure are getting Yourself in a fine state 310 00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,839 For the pistol Qualifying tomorrow. 311 00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,174 Tomorrow? 312 00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:29,509 For a man in my position, There is no tomorrow! 313 00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:32,412 Where you going? 314 00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:35,916 Swept into the dustbin Of history. 315 00:13:35,949 --> 00:13:38,218 Exit barney fife. 316 00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:44,591 You worried About barney, pa? 317 00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,359 No, I'm not worried About him. 318 00:13:46,393 --> 00:13:48,095 He can take care Of himself. 319 00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:50,163 I just wonder where he is Is all. 320 00:13:50,197 --> 00:13:51,564 Hmm. 321 00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:55,268 He's not at the courthouse, Not at the diner. 322 00:13:55,302 --> 00:13:57,170 His landlady Hasn't seen him. 323 00:13:57,204 --> 00:13:58,571 Floyd hasn't seen him. 324 00:13:58,605 --> 00:14:00,573 I just don't know Where he got to. 325 00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:02,442 Out practicing With his gun? 326 00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:04,411 No. We'd have heard that. 327 00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,445 Hmm. 328 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:10,183 What you do When you're looking for somebody 329 00:14:10,217 --> 00:14:12,319 Is you put yourself In his position. 330 00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:14,654 Then you think Like he does. 331 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:18,291 Trouble is, I can't think Like barney does. 332 00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:19,592 Mm-hmm. 333 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,099 Ope. 334 00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,200 Yeah, pa. 335 00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:29,970 Suppose you was In barney's place. 336 00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:31,238 What would you do? 337 00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:34,407 I think I'd go out to the dump 338 00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:36,543 And...And look For that chain letter. 339 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,688 Hey, barn. 340 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:49,689 [ gasps ] 341 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:50,690 How you doing? 342 00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:51,925 Oh, hi, andy. 343 00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,693 I was just checking The dump. 344 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,428 Good. 345 00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:58,698 They ought to start burning This stuff pretty soon. 346 00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,533 Yeah. Well, we've had Some complaints. 347 00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:02,269 They're getting The drift of it 348 00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:03,703 In the northern part Of town. 349 00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,438 I wouldn't be surprised. 350 00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:07,307 Should have brought My pistol. 351 00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:08,575 Knock off a few rats. 352 00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:09,909 Yeah. 353 00:15:11,344 --> 00:15:12,712 Well, uh... 354 00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:15,983 Say, what are you doing Out here anyway? 355 00:15:16,016 --> 00:15:18,251 I came to help you Look for the letter. 356 00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:23,690 Well... Thanks, but I'm... 357 00:15:23,723 --> 00:15:26,693 Afraid it's like looking For a needle in a haystack. 358 00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:28,195 Aw, come on. 359 00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:30,697 There's a lot of stuff here. 360 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:32,165 Look at that. 361 00:15:32,199 --> 00:15:36,303 Old buzzy leonard's car. 362 00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:39,472 Dave burress' stuff. 363 00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:41,308 Ah. 364 00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:42,542 Hey. Hey, here's a letter. 365 00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:44,377 What? Where? 366 00:15:44,411 --> 00:15:47,447 I didn't know herbert swindell Was such a romantic type. 367 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,582 Oh. [ laughs ] 368 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:52,352 Miss hudgens' Grocery list. 369 00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:54,421 Pies, cakes, cookies. 370 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:57,390 She always claimed her weight Was a glandular condition. 371 00:15:57,424 --> 00:15:59,026 Well, she's got Very fat glands. 372 00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,427 Yeah. 373 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,996 That's--well... 374 00:16:03,030 --> 00:16:04,631 Uh-oh. 375 00:16:04,664 --> 00:16:06,166 What's this? 376 00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:09,536 Now, who would take a magazine Like this? 377 00:16:09,569 --> 00:16:14,541 Why, that young lady ought to be Ashamed of herself. 378 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,143 Now, who took-- 379 00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:17,644 Barney! 380 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,313 I subscribe to that magazine. You see-- [ clears throat ] 381 00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:22,382 This fella was working His way through college, 382 00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:24,084 And I thought I'd give him a break. 383 00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,518 He ought to be Doing right well. 384 00:16:25,552 --> 00:16:27,687 There's some interesting Articles in that magazine -- 385 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:29,322 And by some real Famous authors, too. 386 00:16:29,356 --> 00:16:30,457 Like who? 387 00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,325 Well...Uh... 388 00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:36,529 I can't think of one offhand, But what issue is that? 389 00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:39,532 January. 390 00:16:39,566 --> 00:16:41,534 Quite a month, huh? 391 00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:43,603 The photography in there Is excellent. 392 00:16:43,636 --> 00:16:46,206 I mean, look at the ribbon On her foot there. 393 00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:47,640 The detail is just perfect. 394 00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:49,376 Probably used a very fast lens. 395 00:16:49,409 --> 00:16:51,678 Yeah, yeah, I'd say That's a fast lens. 396 00:16:51,711 --> 00:16:53,513 Just forget About the magazine. 397 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,382 I mean, my whole career As a deputy 398 00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:57,050 Is just hanging By a thread. 399 00:16:57,084 --> 00:16:58,451 Pretty good, Though, huh? 400 00:16:58,485 --> 00:17:00,320 Yeah, well... 401 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:03,056 [ chuckles ] 402 00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:04,591 Well, want to look Some more? 403 00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:05,725 What's the use? 404 00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:07,627 Couldn't find it In a million years 405 00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,129 And what do you care? 406 00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:11,498 Most valuable letter To come into a man's life, 407 00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,333 And you tell him To throw it away. 408 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:14,601 Why don't you go to bed? 409 00:17:14,634 --> 00:17:16,469 Yeah, I think I will. 410 00:17:16,503 --> 00:17:19,472 A lot of good it'll do, But I am. 411 00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:22,242 There. Look what you made me do. 412 00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:28,615 Morning, barn. 413 00:17:28,648 --> 00:17:29,616 Morning, ange. 414 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:30,617 Hey, barn. 415 00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:31,618 Hi, goober. 416 00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,220 Get any sleep last night? 417 00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:34,487 Not a wink. Not a wink. 418 00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:36,756 You know what the matter With you is, barn? 419 00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:38,358 You think too much. 420 00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,760 Makes a feller very nervous When he thinks too much. 421 00:17:40,793 --> 00:17:42,729 Thanks for the Tip, goober. 422 00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:47,300 Oh, barn... 423 00:17:47,334 --> 00:17:50,170 That's not all Goober's got for you. 424 00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:51,438 Right, goober? 425 00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:52,605 Yo. 426 00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:53,640 What are you talking about? 427 00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,342 Well, I just Got to thinking. 428 00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:57,577 Since floyd sent you A copy of the letter, 429 00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:00,413 He must have sent a copy To somebody else, right? 430 00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:02,849 Why didn't I think of that? 431 00:18:02,882 --> 00:18:06,519 Goober's brought you His copy, right, goober? 432 00:18:06,553 --> 00:18:09,189 Here you are, barn. 433 00:18:09,222 --> 00:18:10,457 I sent my two copies on. 434 00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,825 One to gomer in the marines, One to aunt flo. 435 00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:15,595 I had real good luck Since I sent on them letters. 436 00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:17,264 Three flats tires this week. 437 00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,866 Ain't had a big flat-tire week Like that all year. 438 00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:21,734 Thanks, goober. 439 00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:24,737 Goob, it was nice of you To bring the letter over here. 440 00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:26,339 We sure appreciate it. 441 00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:29,342 Aw, I'm always ready To help a feller out in trouble. 442 00:18:29,376 --> 00:18:31,478 Well, it was mighty nice Of you, goob. 443 00:18:31,511 --> 00:18:32,745 Yeah, it was nice. 444 00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:33,746 Thanks, goober. 445 00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:35,215 You welcome. 446 00:18:36,516 --> 00:18:39,219 Well, we'll, uh, We'll, we'll see you, goob. 447 00:18:39,252 --> 00:18:41,321 Okay. See ya, andy. 448 00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:42,689 [ clicks tongue ] 449 00:18:46,926 --> 00:18:49,462 I think it was mighty nice Of goober 450 00:18:49,496 --> 00:18:51,198 To come All the way over here 451 00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:53,333 And bring you that letter, Don't you? 452 00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:00,607 What did you mean by that? 453 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,610 Nothing. I just think It was nice of goober 454 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,879 To come all the way over here And bring you that letter. 455 00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:14,221 You could have brought it over Here yourself, couldn't you? 456 00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,488 Goober didn't mind. 457 00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,528 I think I know why you had Goober bring it over. 458 00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:23,630 You're trying to show me 459 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,798 That it's only The non-intellectual types 460 00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:28,701 Like goober and floyd that go in For this sort of thing. 461 00:19:28,735 --> 00:19:31,504 Well, barney, That's entirely up to you. 462 00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:32,772 It means nothing to you 463 00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:34,941 That I'm afraid to walk Out of the house, 464 00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:36,376 That I've lost thelma lou, 465 00:19:36,409 --> 00:19:38,411 That I'm about to lose Out as a deputy. 466 00:19:38,445 --> 00:19:39,412 That means nothing? 467 00:19:39,446 --> 00:19:40,647 It means something, 468 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,682 But I don't think A jinx is behind it, no. 469 00:19:42,715 --> 00:19:44,417 And if I send These copies on, 470 00:19:44,451 --> 00:19:46,553 Then that means I've Given in to superstition. 471 00:19:46,586 --> 00:19:49,356 I'm going to have that On my back the rest of my life. 472 00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:50,623 Why don't you say it? 473 00:19:50,657 --> 00:19:51,724 You just said it. 474 00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:56,996 Do you have any idea How hard it is 475 00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:59,999 To work with somebody that Thinks he knows everything? 476 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:03,736 Barney, why don't you do Whatever you think is best? 477 00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:06,339 No, no. It was your idea to Throw the letter away. 478 00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,875 It was your idea to bring Goober over here with it. 479 00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:11,344 So you decide whether To send it on or not. 480 00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:13,313 There's the letter! Now, you decide! 481 00:20:13,346 --> 00:20:14,881 Whichever it is, Don't tell me! 482 00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,483 I don't want to know! 483 00:20:16,516 --> 00:20:18,885 I'll wait for you Out in the squad car. 484 00:20:18,918 --> 00:20:20,887 You work with a person Long enough, 485 00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,822 You get as goofy as he is. 486 00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:25,892 [ clears throat ] 487 00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,896 Sarah. 488 00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:32,365 Fine. How are you? 489 00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:34,301 Well... 490 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,502 Soak it, sarah. 491 00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:37,770 Soak it a lot In warm salt water. 492 00:20:37,804 --> 00:20:42,241 Listen, sarah, Get me thelma lou, will you? 493 00:20:43,543 --> 00:20:46,513 I know she's barney's girl. 494 00:20:46,546 --> 00:20:48,281 Because I don't want to. 495 00:20:48,315 --> 00:20:50,049 I-I don't want to talk To juanita. 496 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,251 Now, get me thelma lou. 497 00:20:55,722 --> 00:20:58,358 You going to send it? I don't want to know. 498 00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:06,899 Now, there's nothing to be Nervous about, barney. 499 00:21:06,933 --> 00:21:08,435 Nervous? Who's nervous? 500 00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:10,803 Did you mail them letters? I don't want to know. 501 00:21:10,837 --> 00:21:13,406 Why don't you practice A little while you wait? 502 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:14,907 Oh, that won't do No good. 503 00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,943 Just draw and aim Right over that way. 504 00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:18,678 Draw and aim. Draw and aim. 505 00:21:18,711 --> 00:21:20,079 [ gunshot ] 506 00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:21,414 Are you hurt? 507 00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:22,715 You didn't mail them, Did you? 508 00:21:22,749 --> 00:21:26,619 Barney, you got to try To control your nerves. 509 00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:29,088 You still don't understand, Do you?! 510 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:30,557 It's out of my hands. 511 00:21:30,590 --> 00:21:32,525 Oh, come on. 512 00:21:32,559 --> 00:21:33,793 Hey, look who's coming. 513 00:21:33,826 --> 00:21:34,994 Hi, thelma lou. 514 00:21:35,027 --> 00:21:36,329 Thelma lou? 515 00:21:36,363 --> 00:21:38,731 I just came over To see my man shoot. 516 00:21:38,765 --> 00:21:40,433 Isn't that a Nice surprise? 517 00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:43,836 Well, I...Got this Sort of head cold, thelma lou. 518 00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:46,105 I know you're going to do Wonderfully, barney. 519 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,507 Course he will. 520 00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:48,775 Well, I... [ clears throat ] 521 00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,577 I do better At moving targets 522 00:21:50,610 --> 00:21:53,913 You know, like fleeing bank Robbers and things like that. 523 00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:56,949 You know, I never have Seen you shoot, barney, 524 00:21:56,983 --> 00:21:58,985 And it's such A masculine thing. 525 00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:03,122 Well, the main thing about a gun 526 00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:05,725 Is you never point this baby At anything 527 00:22:05,758 --> 00:22:07,093 Unless you aim to kill. 528 00:22:07,126 --> 00:22:09,596 Unless you're shooting At a target, of course. 529 00:22:17,069 --> 00:22:18,070 I hit it. 530 00:22:18,104 --> 00:22:19,539 Good, barn. Good, good. 531 00:22:19,572 --> 00:22:21,007 Oh, do it again, Barney! 532 00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:34,621 Well, you sure Did it, barn. 533 00:22:34,654 --> 00:22:35,888 You sure did it. 534 00:22:35,922 --> 00:22:37,624 Oh, that was marvelous, Barney. 535 00:22:37,657 --> 00:22:39,626 [ laughing ] Oh, well... 536 00:22:41,528 --> 00:22:42,829 Well, all it takes 537 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:44,697 Is a keen eye And a steady hand. 538 00:22:44,731 --> 00:22:46,566 I guess I was born With them. 539 00:22:46,599 --> 00:22:48,034 Well, the main Thing is 540 00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:49,636 You did it All by yourself. 541 00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:50,637 What's that? 542 00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:51,871 Oh, nothing. 543 00:22:51,904 --> 00:22:53,906 Just a good-luck charm Barney didn't need. 544 00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:55,842 I always feel good 545 00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:58,611 When I can strike a blow Against superstition. 546 00:22:58,645 --> 00:23:00,580 You got a little, uh, Lipstick... 547 00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:02,649 Oh. [ laughs ] 548 00:23:02,682 --> 00:23:04,417 Yeah. 549 00:23:10,823 --> 00:23:12,792 I believe you dropped Your rabbit's foot. 550 00:23:12,825 --> 00:23:14,461 It's a key chain. 551 00:23:14,494 --> 00:23:16,563 I just forgot the keys That go with it. 552 00:23:16,596 --> 00:23:17,764 Here's your Four-leaf clover. 553 00:23:17,797 --> 00:23:19,165 Four-leaf clover? 554 00:23:19,198 --> 00:23:21,534 Yeah, it's a four leaf clover. Can't you see? 555 00:23:21,568 --> 00:23:23,803 And don't start on that Superstition thing again. 556 00:23:23,836 --> 00:23:26,105 It's caution, just caution! 557 00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:37,016 Hi, barn. 558 00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:38,217 Floyd. 559 00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:39,952 Morning, andy. Wonderful morning. 560 00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:41,220 Yeah. 561 00:23:41,253 --> 00:23:42,789 What you trying to hide there, Barn? 562 00:23:42,822 --> 00:23:45,625 Oh, I wasn't hiding anything. I was... 563 00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:47,193 Well, if you must know, 564 00:23:47,226 --> 00:23:49,862 I'm gonna send out these copies Of that lucky letter. 565 00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:50,863 You're kidding. 566 00:23:50,897 --> 00:23:53,032 A wise thing to do, andy. 567 00:23:53,065 --> 00:23:54,133 Can't do any harm, can it? 568 00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,702 That's right. What harm can it do? 569 00:23:55,735 --> 00:23:57,103 But you already qualified, 570 00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:59,071 And you got thelma lou back And everything. 571 00:23:59,105 --> 00:24:00,840 You did it on your own Without those. 572 00:24:00,873 --> 00:24:02,842 Look, I got by without it, Didn't I? 573 00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:04,544 So now I'll get by With it. 574 00:24:04,577 --> 00:24:06,913 You beat everything. You beat everything. 575 00:24:06,946 --> 00:24:08,615 I'm gonna drop these In the box. 576 00:24:08,648 --> 00:24:09,616 Mm. 577 00:24:09,649 --> 00:24:11,217 [ chuckles ] 578 00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:13,853 Hot stuff. Hot stuff. 579 00:24:20,059 --> 00:24:22,094 [ horn blares, tires screech ] 580 00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:24,964 Barney: you're on my foot! You're on my foot! 581 00:24:24,997 --> 00:24:27,233 Back it up! Back it up! 582 00:24:27,266 --> 00:24:29,569 What's happened, andy? What's happened? 583 00:24:29,602 --> 00:24:32,038 Oh, nothing much. 584 00:24:32,071 --> 00:24:35,174 I guess barney's Just plain unlucky. 585 00:24:40,246 --> 00:24:43,482 [ whistling sprightly tune ] 40418

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