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1
00:00:03,337 --> 00:00:06,540
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
2
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,346
Starring andy griffith...
3
00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:15,216
With ronny howard...
4
00:00:15,249 --> 00:00:18,252
Also starring don knotts.
5
00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:33,467
Now, listen, johnny paul,
I was here first.
6
00:00:33,501 --> 00:00:34,768
No, I was here first.
7
00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,637
Okay, fair and square.
Odds or evens?
8
00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:38,372
Evens.
9
00:00:40,674 --> 00:00:41,842
I win.
10
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,377
Wait a minute.
Two out of three.
11
00:00:43,411 --> 00:00:45,413
No, you don't.
We didn't say that.
12
00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:49,617
Ma'am, would you like
To buy a jar of...?
13
00:00:57,258 --> 00:01:00,594
Hey, how you
Guys doing?
14
00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:04,165
How many you
Got left, opie?
15
00:01:04,198 --> 00:01:05,499
Twenty-two.
16
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:07,268
I only got 18 left.
17
00:01:07,301 --> 00:01:08,536
How come you sold so many?
18
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,371
I mailed them to
All my relatives
19
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,573
But they didn't
Send me any money yet.
20
00:01:15,309 --> 00:01:17,211
Take it easy.
21
00:01:17,245 --> 00:01:19,513
He won't buy any.
22
00:01:19,547 --> 00:01:20,881
You'll see.
23
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,417
[ doorbell buzzing ]
24
00:01:23,451 --> 00:01:26,720
All:
Sir, would you like
To buy a jar of...?
25
00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:33,694
I don't see how anybody's
Gonna win that pony.
26
00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:35,529
Yeah, we'll
Never win it.
27
00:01:35,563 --> 00:01:38,432
I think I'm gonna quit
And send all my salve back.
28
00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:41,202
Not me. I'm
Gonna try and
Sell some more.
29
00:01:41,235 --> 00:01:42,403
Me, too.
30
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:43,804
But where?
31
00:01:47,175 --> 00:01:48,409
[ all yelling ]
32
00:01:55,316 --> 00:01:57,151
Hi, son.
33
00:01:57,185 --> 00:01:58,352
Hi, paw.
34
00:01:58,386 --> 00:02:00,354
How's the salve
Business coming?
35
00:02:00,388 --> 00:02:01,689
It ain't.
36
00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:02,890
Paw...
37
00:02:02,923 --> 00:02:04,558
No.
38
00:02:04,592 --> 00:02:07,895
Now, look, I've already bought
Three jars of that stuff
39
00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:10,731
And I ain't even susceptible
To poison ivy.
40
00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:13,701
But it's good for a lot
Of other stuff, too --
41
00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:18,906
"Athlete's foot, prickly rash,
Complexion, and spring itch."
42
00:02:18,939 --> 00:02:21,609
Well, I don't plan on getting
Any of that stuff either.
43
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:24,412
Son, I warned you
44
00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:26,547
That stuff
Wasn't gonna be easy to sell.
45
00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:28,416
You sure were right, paw.
46
00:02:28,449 --> 00:02:31,585
I was kinda thinkin'
I might send it back.
47
00:02:31,619 --> 00:02:36,257
Well, I tried to tell you
It wasn't gonna be easy.
48
00:02:36,290 --> 00:02:37,758
Hi.
49
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:38,959
Andy: oh, hi.
50
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:40,661
Have any luck
Over at mrs. Farley's?
51
00:02:40,694 --> 00:02:44,265
No. It was a false alarm.
52
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:46,500
She got out of that tree
All by herself.
53
00:02:46,534 --> 00:02:48,502
She was sitting
On the front porch
54
00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:50,504
With her fat face
In a pan of milk
55
00:02:50,538 --> 00:02:51,705
When I drove up.
56
00:02:51,739 --> 00:02:52,906
Who, mrs. Farley?
57
00:02:52,940 --> 00:02:56,777
No. Her cat.
What a question.
58
00:02:56,810 --> 00:02:58,646
Mrs. Farley
Ain't got a fat face.
59
00:02:58,679 --> 00:02:59,913
She's got a thin face.
60
00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:06,354
Uh, barney...
61
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:09,357
No. I ain't buying
Any more of your salve.
62
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,359
But, barney...
No.
63
00:03:11,392 --> 00:03:12,693
It's supposed to be good
For crow's-feet.
64
00:03:12,726 --> 00:03:14,228
I put it on my crow's-feet
A week ago
65
00:03:14,262 --> 00:03:15,429
And they're still there.
66
00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:18,232
See that crease
In my cheek? Nothing.
67
00:03:18,266 --> 00:03:20,401
So don't try to sell me
Any more of your salve.
68
00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:21,935
Don't be too tough
On him, barn.
69
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:23,637
He's having
A little difficulty
70
00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:24,838
Moving that product.
71
00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:26,240
It just ain't easy.
72
00:03:26,274 --> 00:03:27,575
Well, I suppose not.
73
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,577
Door-to-door
Selling stuff.
74
00:03:29,610 --> 00:03:32,746
Well, maybe you ain't
Using salesmanship, ope.
75
00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:34,682
A good salesman
Can sell anything.
76
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:35,883
Right, andy?
77
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:37,285
Right.
78
00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:38,686
How you been going
About it anyways?
79
00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:40,588
What do you say when you
Come up to somebody's door?
80
00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:41,789
Let's see
Your technique.
81
00:03:41,822 --> 00:03:44,825
Well, I just hold out
A jar of salve
82
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,027
And say, "Pardon me, ma'am.
83
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,962
Would you like to buy a...?"
84
00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:50,898
Well? Go on.
85
00:03:50,931 --> 00:03:53,734
That's as far as I get. Then
They slam the door in my face.
86
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:55,803
Barney:
Well, there's your trouble.
87
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:58,506
You can't give 'em a chance
To cut you off like that.
88
00:03:58,539 --> 00:03:59,840
You got to get your foot
In the door
89
00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,375
And start talking
And never stop.
90
00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:03,377
Right, ang?
Right.
91
00:04:03,411 --> 00:04:05,379
Here, let me show you.
Give me that.
92
00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:07,381
They open the door.
93
00:04:07,415 --> 00:04:08,949
Then you say,
"Hello, little girl.
94
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:10,651
"May I see the lady
Of the house?
95
00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,453
Oh, you are the lady
Of the house."
96
00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:15,889
A little flattery
Don't hurt none.
97
00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:17,591
"I have here a little item
Known as miracle salve
98
00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:19,627
"Guaranteed to remove blemishes,
Crow's-feet
99
00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:21,629
"And those telltale lines
Under the eyes --
100
00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:22,896
"Not that you need it, madam,
101
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,598
But just to have around
In case."
102
00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:25,966
"Excuse me, young man.
103
00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:29,036
I got a pineapple
Upside-down cake in the oven."
104
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:30,571
Well, anyway, ope --
105
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:33,541
Salesmanship,
That's the important thing.
106
00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:35,576
What barney's tryin'
To tell you, son
107
00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,478
Is make your product
Sound good.
108
00:04:37,511 --> 00:04:39,513
Make it sound
As good as you can.
109
00:04:39,547 --> 00:04:40,714
Exactly.
110
00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:43,317
Hey, remember
Them flower seeds we sold
111
00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:44,552
When we were kids?
112
00:04:44,585 --> 00:04:46,987
The ones guaranteed
To bloom night and day
113
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,422
For six months long?
114
00:04:48,456 --> 00:04:51,359
Well, people bought them up
Like hotcakes.
115
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,661
Just technique
And salesmanship.
116
00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:56,664
Well, I'll keep trying.
Thanks, barney.
117
00:04:56,697 --> 00:04:58,432
Just do the best
You can, son.
118
00:04:58,466 --> 00:05:00,468
That's all anybody
Can expect of you.
119
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:03,337
I will, paw. Bye.
120
00:05:03,371 --> 00:05:05,739
Bye.
121
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:08,909
Opie's findin' out
How tough it is
To make a dollar.
122
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:10,444
Yeah.
123
00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:13,046
Speaking of them flower seeds
We used to sell
124
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,949
I was looking through
Some stuff the other night
125
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,351
And guess what.
126
00:05:17,385 --> 00:05:19,987
I still got
Five packs of 'em.
127
00:05:20,020 --> 00:05:21,522
No kidding.
128
00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:24,858
They weren't bad-looking
Little flowers at that.
129
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:27,027
No. They was
Kinda pretty.
130
00:05:27,060 --> 00:05:29,963
'course I ain't got
Much use for 'em
131
00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:32,366
Livin' in one room that way.
132
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:35,035
But you live
In that big house.
133
00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:37,738
You got all that garden space.
Ang?
134
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:38,972
No.
135
00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:44,011
Hi, you guys.
136
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:46,714
Hey, ope, you hear about
What happened to trey?
137
00:05:46,747 --> 00:05:48,716
Tell him, trey.
What happened?
138
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:51,719
Well, I sent back all those jars
Of salve I didn't sell,
139
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:53,153
Like I said
I was going to.
140
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,622
Won't they
Take 'em back?
141
00:05:54,655 --> 00:05:56,490
They took 'em back,
All right, but they said
142
00:05:56,524 --> 00:05:58,992
They were real disappointed
In me as a salesman
143
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:01,529
And they were putting
Me on a blacklist.
144
00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:02,830
How about that?
145
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:05,533
Gee, isn't that awful?
Wow.
146
00:06:05,566 --> 00:06:07,735
What's a blacklist?
147
00:06:07,768 --> 00:06:08,936
I don't know.
148
00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:10,137
What's a blacklist, trey?
149
00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:11,639
I don't know.
150
00:06:11,672 --> 00:06:13,841
Gee, ope, I bet
Your paw would know.
151
00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:15,809
Hey, yeah.
Let's go ask him.
152
00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:30,591
[ snoring ]
153
00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:32,593
I think he's asleep.
154
00:06:32,626 --> 00:06:34,094
I didn't know
Police slept.
155
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:37,097
Sure they do,
But they sleep light, see.
156
00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:39,099
They're alert
Even when they're asleep.
157
00:06:39,132 --> 00:06:42,135
He'd wake up just like that
If anything happened.
158
00:06:47,608 --> 00:06:48,909
[ clang ]
159
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:51,612
[ snoring ]
160
00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:55,783
Well, it wasn't
A real emergency.
161
00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:57,017
Barney?
162
00:07:00,621 --> 00:07:03,491
Barney!
163
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:09,062
Over and out.
Ten-four.
164
00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:10,931
Police calls.
165
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:13,100
What, uh...
166
00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:15,469
What can I do
For you boys?
167
00:07:15,503 --> 00:07:16,937
Barney, do you know
Where paw is?
168
00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:19,807
Well, I think
He went out on a call.
169
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:21,742
Why? What can I do for you?
170
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,711
We wanted
To ask a question.
171
00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,713
Barney,
What's a blacklist?
172
00:07:25,746 --> 00:07:29,883
Well, a blacklist is where
The party of the first part
173
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:33,053
Won't hire the party
Of the second part
174
00:07:33,086 --> 00:07:35,489
Because of something
175
00:07:35,523 --> 00:07:37,758
That the party
Of the second part once did
176
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:38,992
Or might have done.
177
00:07:39,026 --> 00:07:41,028
In other words,
You can't get a job. Why?
178
00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:42,262
Who's on a blacklist?
179
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,998
Trey.
Show him the letter, trey.
180
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:50,037
Barney will know what to do.
Just leave it to barney.
181
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:52,773
Wow.
182
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,942
What are you gonna do, trey?
183
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:56,276
Opie:
Trey doesn't know
What to do.
184
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,678
And we're all afraid
185
00:07:57,711 --> 00:07:58,879
We're gonna get
On the blacklist, too
186
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:00,581
'cause we can't sell
Our salve.
187
00:08:00,614 --> 00:08:02,650
We were hoping
You could help us.
188
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:03,951
Well, uh...
189
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:07,721
Let me think about this
A minute.
190
00:08:10,057 --> 00:08:12,726
What was that about the party
And the second part?
191
00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:15,228
Don't you see?
It means you can't get a job.
192
00:08:15,262 --> 00:08:17,931
Can't get a job?
Wow.
193
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:19,567
I got to get a job.
194
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,569
I promised my mother
I'd work for my allowance.
195
00:08:21,602 --> 00:08:23,737
Boys, I got it.
196
00:08:23,771 --> 00:08:25,205
All:
What do you got?
197
00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:27,908
Hold it, hold it, hold it.
How do you fight fire?
198
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,242
With a hose?
199
00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:33,614
No. With fire.
You fight fire with fire.
200
00:08:33,647 --> 00:08:34,948
They scared you
With a letter.
201
00:08:34,982 --> 00:08:36,283
We'll scare them back
With a letter.
202
00:08:36,316 --> 00:08:37,818
What kind
Of letter?
203
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,987
A lawyer letter.
What's a lawyer letter?
204
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,889
Sit down. I'll show you.
205
00:08:41,922 --> 00:08:47,761
Come on. Here.
Write what I say.
206
00:08:47,795 --> 00:08:51,932
From the office
Of bernard p. Fife
207
00:08:51,965 --> 00:08:53,934
Attorney at law.
208
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:55,268
Are you an attorney
At law, barney?
209
00:08:55,302 --> 00:08:57,905
No, no, no, but that'll
Scare 'em. Go on, write.
210
00:08:57,938 --> 00:09:03,010
Gentlemen, my client,
Mr. Trey bowden
211
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:05,012
Has just showed me
Your letter
212
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,747
Of the 15th.
213
00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:12,219
Gentlemen, just what are you
Trying to pull off here anyway?
214
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:15,022
How dare you threaten
A man like mr. Bowden
215
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:18,125
One of the most respected,
One of the most revered
216
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:21,294
One of the best church-going
Citizens of our town?
217
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:26,800
If you don't immediately cease,
Desist, and stop annoying him,
218
00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:30,103
We will see you
In a court of law.
219
00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:32,305
Yours truly...
220
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:35,108
Bernard p. Fife...
221
00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:37,745
Attorney at law.
222
00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:40,914
I don't think
Fighting fire with
Fire is gonna work.
223
00:09:40,948 --> 00:09:42,683
What do you mean?
It ain't gonna work?
224
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:45,152
[ all arguing loudly ]
225
00:09:45,185 --> 00:09:47,821
Barney: there's the sheriff.
We'll ask him.
226
00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:50,691
Don't you fight fire
With fire?
227
00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:51,892
What?
228
00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,226
How do you fight fire?
229
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:54,628
With a hose.
230
00:09:54,662 --> 00:09:55,829
I told you, barney.
231
00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:57,731
What are you
Arguing about?
232
00:09:57,765 --> 00:09:59,967
Trey's been blacklisted.
What?
233
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,736
He got this letter
From the salve company.
234
00:10:02,770 --> 00:10:06,740
Fight fire with fire, I say.
235
00:10:06,774 --> 00:10:09,743
Oh, I see.
236
00:10:09,777 --> 00:10:12,079
Well, don't worry
About this, boys.
237
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,247
They're just tryin'
To intimidate you.
238
00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:16,717
It's their way
Of gettin' you
To sell more salve.
239
00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:19,720
If they send a letter to one of
You saying he's on a blacklist
240
00:10:19,753 --> 00:10:22,355
They figure that'll
Scare the rest of you
241
00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:23,991
Into selling more salve.
242
00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:25,759
It's a method these fellas
Use -- intimidation.
243
00:10:25,793 --> 00:10:27,194
Now, you run on and
Don't worry about it.
244
00:10:27,227 --> 00:10:28,395
Gee, thanks, paw.
245
00:10:28,428 --> 00:10:30,097
That was
Really helpful.
246
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,432
Bye.
247
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:35,803
I never saw such
A clear case of intimidation.
248
00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:37,237
And with a youngster.
249
00:10:37,270 --> 00:10:40,340
Intimidation -- pure
And simple intimidation.
250
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:44,377
Well, they're just
Tryin' to get 'em
To sell more salve.
251
00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:46,279
Tryin' to scare 'em
And worry 'em
252
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,781
And you know what that is.
253
00:10:47,815 --> 00:10:48,982
Intimidation?
254
00:10:49,016 --> 00:10:50,784
Of course it's intimidation.
255
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,986
We oughta figure a way
Of getting back at them --
The crooks.
256
00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:55,055
Well, I wouldn't
Call 'em crooks.
257
00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:56,323
They're foxes maybe...
258
00:10:56,356 --> 00:10:58,025
High-pressure
Operators of a sort
259
00:10:58,058 --> 00:10:59,359
But I wouldn't
Call 'em crooks.
260
00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:01,228
I got it. I got it.
What?
261
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:02,763
You just gave me the idea.
262
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:05,098
Foxy, are they?
How do you deal with a fox?
263
00:11:05,132 --> 00:11:06,967
Set the dogs on 'em?
No.
264
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,168
Trap?
No!
265
00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:09,937
No. You outfox a fox.
266
00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:12,105
I never tried that way.
Oh,
This is a great idea.
267
00:11:12,139 --> 00:11:14,107
I don't know why we didn't
Think of it sooner.
What?
268
00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,977
This idea of mine.
Now, listen to this.
269
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:20,213
You and me go over to mt. Pilot
Where those guys are...
No.
270
00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:21,414
Now, hear me out.
No.
271
00:11:21,448 --> 00:11:22,950
We go over to mt. Pilot --
No.
272
00:11:22,983 --> 00:11:24,151
Here me out.
You didn't listen to my idea.
273
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,786
I don't wanna
Hear your idea.
274
00:11:25,819 --> 00:11:27,955
Barney, I'm
Not interested in
Going to mt. Pilot.
275
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:30,123
Oh, don't close your mind.
Boy, when you close your mind --
276
00:11:30,157 --> 00:11:32,993
My mind's closed.
My mind's closed.
277
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:35,362
I'm going on patrol.
278
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:41,835
Closed mind.
279
00:11:47,941 --> 00:11:52,245
Sarah, get me
Wiley's filling station.
280
00:11:52,279 --> 00:11:54,514
[ ringing ]
Hello.
281
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:57,050
Hey, gome. Barn.
282
00:11:57,084 --> 00:11:59,753
How would you like to take
A little drive with me
283
00:11:59,787 --> 00:12:01,955
Over to mt. Pilot?
284
00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,268
That's it.
285
00:12:15,302 --> 00:12:16,804
Okay.
286
00:12:16,837 --> 00:12:18,806
Now, gomer, have you got
Everything straight?
287
00:12:18,839 --> 00:12:20,974
I think so.
Keep your voice down.
288
00:12:21,008 --> 00:12:22,976
You all set?
[ no audio ]
289
00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:25,145
What?
All set.
290
00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:27,180
Let's go.
291
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:41,394
What can I do
For you gentlemen?
292
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:44,097
We'd like to see
The man in charge.
293
00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:47,400
What's on your mind?
294
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:49,436
We'd like to buy
Some of your salve.
295
00:12:49,469 --> 00:12:53,040
You want to buy
Some of our salve?
296
00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:54,407
That's right.
297
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:57,244
Well, you gentlemen
Are a little too old
298
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,979
For a pony, aren't you?
299
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:01,849
Oh, no.
You see, it's like this.
300
00:13:01,882 --> 00:13:03,817
My name is opie taylor, sr.
301
00:13:03,851 --> 00:13:09,122
And my little boy sent away
For some of your salve.
302
00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:10,557
Yeah?
303
00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:11,959
He got to experimentin'
With it,
304
00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:13,460
You know,
Like kids do sometimes.
305
00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:15,528
So he put some on his dog.
306
00:13:15,562 --> 00:13:18,932
You see, jr's dog
Had the mange.
Yeah?
307
00:13:18,966 --> 00:13:21,034
Well, that mange
Cured up over night.
308
00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:22,469
Darndest thing I ever saw.
309
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:24,104
Yeah?
310
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,173
So I took some of the salve
Over to dr. Pendyke here.
311
00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:28,141
Dr. Pendyke's
A veterinarian.
312
00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:30,010
[ high voice ]
That is correct.
313
00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:32,512
U.T. Pendyke, d.V.M.
314
00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:35,215
Practice limited
To small animals --
315
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:38,886
Dogs, cats,
Birds of all kinds,
And small sheep.
316
00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:40,854
Mr. Taylor, sr. Here
317
00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:43,256
Brought me some
Of your ointment,
318
00:13:43,290 --> 00:13:46,493
And I tried it out on
Six of my mangy animals.
319
00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:49,396
It cured them within
A 24-hour period --
320
00:13:49,429 --> 00:13:51,031
An absolute miracle.
321
00:13:51,064 --> 00:13:52,900
By the way
That's a fine name
322
00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:54,234
You've got for your company,
Young man --
323
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:56,036
The miracle salve company.
324
00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:57,971
Well, thank you.
325
00:13:58,005 --> 00:14:00,507
It's much better
Than the ointment
I've been using --
326
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:02,009
Molly harkins mange cure.
327
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:04,644
It is?
Yes. Much better.
328
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,447
So we thought we'd
Like to buy it from you
329
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:11,251
And sell it to
Other veterinarians
Or even drugstores.
330
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:14,621
N-n-now, wait a minute.
Let me get this straight.
331
00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:17,590
You wanna buy our salve
And sell it to...
332
00:14:17,624 --> 00:14:19,426
Excuse me.
333
00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:20,894
Lenny!
334
00:14:20,928 --> 00:14:23,330
I'm sure that many
Of my colleagues
335
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:26,066
Would be interested
In your product --
336
00:14:26,099 --> 00:14:27,600
Dr. Webster, dr. Neeley.
337
00:14:27,634 --> 00:14:30,637
They get a lot of mange
This time of year.
338
00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:34,374
W-will you excuse me
For a moment?
339
00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:36,944
Lenny!
340
00:14:39,012 --> 00:14:42,149
What's the matter
With your voice?
341
00:14:42,182 --> 00:14:44,017
[ normal voice ]
That's a disguise.
342
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:45,685
How do you do that?
343
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:47,220
Takes practice.
344
00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:48,555
That's good.
345
00:14:48,588 --> 00:14:51,658
I wish I could do
My voice like that.
346
00:14:51,691 --> 00:14:53,326
A couple of
Fellas out there.
347
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,195
They say they want
To buy our salve.
348
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:56,696
They say it
Cures the mange.
349
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:59,699
Our salve?
Yeah.
350
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:02,970
Let's go.
351
00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:05,939
Leonard, these gentlemen
Would like to buy
352
00:15:05,973 --> 00:15:07,207
Some of our salve.
353
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,109
[ deep voice ]
Howdy.
354
00:15:09,142 --> 00:15:12,512
My name is opie taylor, sr.,
And this is dr. Pendyke.
355
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:14,347
Lenny:
How do you do?
356
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:16,583
They'd like to get
Some salve from us
357
00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:18,351
And sell it to veterinarians.
358
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:19,652
Oh, very good.
359
00:15:19,686 --> 00:15:22,022
That's right.
[ high voice ]
Yes, we figure
360
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:24,691
We could pay your
Regular 35 cents a jar
361
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,626
And then sell it
For a little more
362
00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:28,595
And make some profit
For ourselves.
363
00:15:28,628 --> 00:15:31,664
See, you'd be making money,
We'd be making money --
364
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,533
A good deal
For both of us.
365
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:36,069
Yes, that would be a fine deal.
Wouldn't it, lenny?
366
00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:37,304
Yeah. Yeah.
367
00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:38,505
Uh, by the way
368
00:15:38,538 --> 00:15:41,008
How much of it do
You have on hand?
369
00:15:41,041 --> 00:15:43,576
Oh, about four
Or five gross.
370
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:46,379
Well, uh, that's
Good for a starter.
371
00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:48,015
But don't you think
372
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:51,718
You can get some more back
From those boys in mayberry?
373
00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:53,286
Why, certainly,
Certainly.
374
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,288
We'll see what we
Can scrape up for you.
375
00:15:55,322 --> 00:15:58,458
Oh, that'd be fine.
You be sure and do that now.
376
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:02,462
Well, I guess it's time
To go, mr. Taylor, sr.
377
00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:05,132
Good day, gentlemen.
[ normal voice ]
Good day.
378
00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:06,366
[ high voice ]
Good day.
379
00:16:08,335 --> 00:16:12,172
[ door closes ]
380
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:15,008
Cures the mange?
381
00:16:15,042 --> 00:16:18,378
That's what they say.
382
00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:20,547
[ normal voice ]
You wanna know what's
Going to happen now?
383
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:21,748
I'll tell ya.
384
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:23,516
They're on the phone
Right now
385
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:26,053
Calling every veterinarian
And drugstore in the county
386
00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:28,055
Telling them they got
A new mange cure.
387
00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:30,057
Then they're gonna
Go to mayberry
388
00:16:30,090 --> 00:16:31,558
And pick up every
Jar of salve.
389
00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:33,260
How about that?
390
00:16:33,293 --> 00:16:37,597
[ normal voice ] How'd you
Do that with your voice?
391
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,132
Could I have some
Pipin' hot coffee?
392
00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:40,800
Aunt bee! Aunt bee,
Look what I got!
393
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,335
Paw, guess what!
394
00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:44,104
I got a letter
From the miracle salve company
395
00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:46,106
And they want
Their salve back.
You don't mean it.
396
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:47,440
It says so right there,
Paw.
397
00:16:47,474 --> 00:16:49,142
I'm supposed to take
All the salve I got
398
00:16:49,176 --> 00:16:50,643
Down to the post office at 1:00.
399
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:53,413
They'll pick it up and give me
A dollar for my trouble.
400
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:55,148
Andy:
I'll be dogged.
401
00:16:55,182 --> 00:16:56,416
Boy, oh, boy.
402
00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,318
I don't have to sell
Any more of that salve.
403
00:16:58,351 --> 00:16:59,519
I don't understand that.
404
00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:01,321
Why would they do
A thing like that?
405
00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:04,524
Beats me. Maybe they're
Going out of business.
406
00:17:04,557 --> 00:17:06,259
I just don't
Understand it, paw.
407
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:08,128
First, they were
After me to sell it
408
00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:09,496
And now,
They want it back.
409
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:12,499
How come, you s'pose?
You got me, buddy.
410
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:13,700
Least you're
Out from under, huh?
411
00:17:13,733 --> 00:17:15,235
Yeah.
412
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:17,104
Sit down and have
Your breakfast, opie.
413
00:17:17,137 --> 00:17:18,805
[ indistinct conversations ]
414
00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:23,643
How many did
You have? One?
415
00:17:23,676 --> 00:17:24,844
Here you are.
416
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:27,580
There you are, son.
There's your dollar.
417
00:17:27,614 --> 00:17:30,450
Did I tell ya?
Did I tell ya?
418
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:34,154
You sure did, dr. Pendyke.
Do that voice again.
419
00:17:34,187 --> 00:17:36,289
No.
420
00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:39,159
Hi, paw!
Look, I got my dollar!
421
00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:40,493
I got my dollar!
422
00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:43,196
Well. Real, too.
Look at there.
423
00:17:43,230 --> 00:17:45,532
Green on one side and gray
On the other and everything.
424
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,534
Yeah.
What are you
Gonna do with it?
425
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:50,437
I don't know, paw.
I'm gonna carry it for awhile.
426
00:17:50,470 --> 00:17:52,205
Well, don't spend it all
In one place.
427
00:17:52,239 --> 00:17:55,308
Oh, I won't.
428
00:17:55,342 --> 00:17:58,878
You know, you got out
Of that thing pretty easy.
429
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,280
I know, paw.
430
00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:02,315
I don't think I coulda
Sold one more jar.
431
00:18:02,349 --> 00:18:04,551
Well, I'm glad
It turned out all right
432
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:07,587
But try not to get involved
In deals like that again.
433
00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:09,189
Okay?
I won't, paw.
434
00:18:09,222 --> 00:18:12,259
You don't have
To worry about that.
Good.
435
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:15,595
Opie: hi, barney.
You hear what happened?
436
00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:17,297
Why, no.
What happened?
437
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:18,798
Those miracle salve people
Just come by
438
00:18:18,831 --> 00:18:21,168
And picked up
All their salve.
439
00:18:21,201 --> 00:18:22,369
You don't say?
440
00:18:22,402 --> 00:18:24,537
Yeah. Took back
Every jar
441
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,406
And give each one of us
A dollar besides.
442
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:29,342
Paw thinks the company's
Going out of business.
443
00:18:29,376 --> 00:18:34,147
Yeah? Maybe they just
Found a new use for it.
444
00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:35,415
What do you mean?
445
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:37,484
Well, maybe
They discovered
446
00:18:37,517 --> 00:18:39,819
That it could,
Uh, cure the mange
447
00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:41,521
Or something like that
448
00:18:41,554 --> 00:18:44,657
And they want to sell it
To veterinarians.
449
00:18:44,691 --> 00:18:47,360
[ high voice ]
Right, gome?
450
00:18:47,394 --> 00:18:50,830
I still don't know
How you do that.
451
00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:53,766
Barney, you wouldn't know
Something about this?
452
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,935
[ high voice ]
Well, maybe I would
453
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,271
And then again,
Maybe I wouldn't.
454
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,175
What's that supposed to mean?
455
00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:04,377
Andy, how do you fight fire?
456
00:19:04,411 --> 00:19:05,845
What?
457
00:19:05,878 --> 00:19:08,415
How do you deal with a fox?
Barney.
458
00:19:08,448 --> 00:19:09,849
All right. You wanna know,
I'll tell ya.
459
00:19:09,882 --> 00:19:11,551
Tell him, barney.
Tell him.
Yeah, I will.
460
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,253
Do that voice
For him, too.
I will.
461
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,654
Tell him everything, now.
Don't leave out nothing.
462
00:19:14,687 --> 00:19:16,189
I'll tell him.
Wait till you
Hear this, andy.
463
00:19:16,223 --> 00:19:17,857
Are you gonna tell me?
Tell him.
464
00:19:17,890 --> 00:19:20,760
Shut up, gomer.
What, barney?
465
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:31,804
Well...
466
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:34,674
[ telephone rings ]
Wait a minute.
467
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:36,676
Sheriff's office.
468
00:19:36,709 --> 00:19:38,611
Oh, hey, aunt bee.
469
00:19:38,645 --> 00:19:40,213
I don't know,
But the least you can do...
470
00:19:40,247 --> 00:19:42,815
A-aunt bee,
Could you talk a little slower?
471
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:46,353
Well, now,
Just calm down, aunt bee.
472
00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:50,690
Well, aunt bee, when you're
Yelling like that, I can't...
473
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:53,393
Listen, aunt bee,
Just-ju-just take it easy.
474
00:19:53,426 --> 00:19:55,662
And I'll come right home.
Right.
475
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,697
Come on, barney,
Let's go over to the house.
476
00:19:57,730 --> 00:19:59,499
Somethin's got aunt bee
Awful upset.
477
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:00,700
Well, what's up?
She didn't say.
Come on.
478
00:20:00,733 --> 00:20:01,901
Well, what's up?
She didn't say.
479
00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:05,805
What's up?
She didn't say.
480
00:20:12,579 --> 00:20:14,414
What's the trouble?
481
00:20:14,447 --> 00:20:16,783
You come inside.
482
00:20:19,852 --> 00:20:23,823
Aunt bee, what --
What in the world...?
483
00:20:23,856 --> 00:20:26,359
What in the world
Is this?
484
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:29,796
946 jars
Of miracle salve
485
00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:33,533
"Payable in seven days
And billed to opie taylor, sr."
486
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:35,668
Andy:
Opie taylor, sr.?
487
00:20:35,702 --> 00:20:37,804
I didn't send away
For it, paw, honest.
488
00:20:37,837 --> 00:20:40,373
Gosh, I was glad to
Get rid of what I had.
489
00:20:40,407 --> 00:20:42,542
Bee:
Why in the world
Would they send
490
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:44,444
All this salve here
Of all places?
491
00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:46,979
And to opie taylor, sr.?
Who is opie taylor, sr.?
492
00:20:47,013 --> 00:20:49,349
It didn't work
493
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:50,683
Like you said it
Was going to, barney.
494
00:20:50,717 --> 00:20:52,018
They supposed to sell
All that stuff
495
00:20:52,051 --> 00:20:53,520
To veterinarians.
496
00:20:53,553 --> 00:20:55,588
You was tryin'
To tell me something
497
00:20:55,622 --> 00:20:57,424
Down at the courthouse, barney.
498
00:20:57,457 --> 00:21:00,760
You wanna tell me now?
Well, uh...
499
00:21:00,793 --> 00:21:04,831
Go on, barney. Tell him.
Might as well tell him now.
500
00:21:04,864 --> 00:21:07,367
Yeah. Tell us --
Tell us a lot of things,
501
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:11,338
Like how you fight fire
And how you outfox a fox
502
00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:13,005
And things like that.
503
00:21:13,039 --> 00:21:15,708
[ clears throat ]
Well, uh...
504
00:21:15,742 --> 00:21:17,043
Go on, barn, tell
Him everything.
505
00:21:17,076 --> 00:21:19,412
Tell him how you
Disguised your voice.
506
00:21:19,446 --> 00:21:22,415
We went over to mt. Pilot
And barney disguised his voice
507
00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:24,917
And he told 'em
He was dr. Pendyke
508
00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:28,655
And that he was a veterinarian
And he examined...
509
00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:32,792
Will you listen?
Will you just listen?
510
00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:35,061
Just get this stuff out of here.
It's all over everywhere.
511
00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:37,063
Now, you got yourself
Into this mess.
512
00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:39,766
You can just get out of it,
Dr. Pendyke.
513
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,768
Will you listen?
I'm gonna get it out.
514
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,470
Don't worry.
I'm gonna get rid of it.
515
00:21:43,503 --> 00:21:44,804
But I got a plan. You got to
Give me a little time.
516
00:21:44,837 --> 00:21:46,339
Yeah, you got a plan.
517
00:21:46,373 --> 00:21:48,408
I rounded up as many
As I could find, barney.
518
00:21:48,441 --> 00:21:50,710
Come on in, fellers.
519
00:21:50,743 --> 00:21:54,046
Yes, yes, come on in,
Boys. Come on.
520
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:55,448
Come on, ope.
Have a seat.
521
00:21:55,482 --> 00:21:56,783
Everybody, sit down.
Have a seat.
522
00:21:56,816 --> 00:21:58,651
Just take a chair.
Go on, in the back there.
523
00:21:58,685 --> 00:22:00,653
Go on, sit down.
There we go.
524
00:22:00,687 --> 00:22:02,789
[ chuckles ]
525
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:04,957
Now, boys,
I'm gonna tell you
526
00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:07,660
Why we've asked you
To come here.
527
00:22:07,694 --> 00:22:11,931
Now, sheriff taylor knows,
And I know,
528
00:22:11,964 --> 00:22:14,634
That for a long time now
You've been trying to sell
529
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:18,471
This thing
They call miracle salve.
530
00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:21,140
Now, we also know
That you've been
531
00:22:21,173 --> 00:22:23,976
Under considerable pressure
To sell it.
532
00:22:24,010 --> 00:22:28,948
In other words, your former
Employers used, uh...
533
00:22:28,981 --> 00:22:31,484
Intimidation.
Uh, right -- intimidation.
534
00:22:31,518 --> 00:22:32,819
Now, here's the deal.
535
00:22:32,852 --> 00:22:35,688
There's not gonna be
Any more pressure,
536
00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:38,691
There's not gonna
Be any intimidation.
537
00:22:38,725 --> 00:22:43,029
You just go out there
And sell that miracle salve.
538
00:22:43,062 --> 00:22:44,497
And who knows?
539
00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:48,768
You just might be the one
To win that pony!
540
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,670
How about it?!
541
00:23:26,205 --> 00:23:28,541
Salve!
Salve!
542
00:23:28,575 --> 00:23:30,743
Salve!
543
00:23:33,513 --> 00:23:36,516
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
38890
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