All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S02E31 Be On Time 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-ZEW_track3_[eng]

- Harriet, I'd like
to propose a toast.

- All right.

- Where are the glasses?
- Oh, right here.

You left them in on the desk.

- No, no, no.

There's one right there.

- Oh.

- To Listerine
Antizyme toothpaste.

- I'll drink to that.

[music playing]

- Listerine, the most widely
used antiseptic in the world

and Antizyme, the first
all-day anti-enzyme toothpaste,

present "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And of course, his lovely wife,
Harriet, as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother,
the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelsons' next-door
neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

[music playing]

- Morning, Mom.

Hi, Pop.

- Oh, good morning, Dave.

- Breakfast about ready?

- Mm-hmm.

Just about.

- I'm kind of in a
hurry this morning.

- Yes, you must be.

You almost beat your
father, and he knew

we were having French toast.

- Did you say French toast?

- I thought that'd bring
your face out of the paper.

- It did.

What's your big hurry, Dave?

- We're having a baseball
game this morning,

and I'm gonna pitch.

- Well, good for you.

Isn't Ricky gonna play?

- He was supposed to,
but I doubt if he does.

- Why?
Why not?

- He probably won't
even get there.

He's such a slowpoke.

- Oh, I wouldn't say that.

- Neither would
he, but it's true.

- He never gets anywhere
on time anymore, does he?

You ought to help him out, Dave.

You're his big brother.

- Oh, I do, Pop.

He told me to wake him up
for the game this morning,

and I did.

- You sure did, all right.

- Hurry up, Rick.

You're late.

- I've been in the shower.

- You mean you were
actually taking

a shower without being told?

- Yeah, I sure was.

Next time, make David tell me
when he's gonna throw me in.

- Oh, you didn't really throw
him in the shower, did you,

David?
- Oh, of course not, Mom.

I put him in there
very carefully.

- Dave, I don't think that
was a very nice thing to do.

- Golly, Pop, he asked for it.

- What do you mean?

I almost got drowned.

- Well, you said to make
sure and wake you up.

- I was getting up.

Slowly, but I was getting up.

- Trouble with you is
you're just a slowpoke.

- I am not.

- You probably won't even
get to the ball game on time.

- Oh, yeah?
That's how much you know.

- Come on, calm down,
will you, fellas?

Sounds like a crazy house
in here or something.

Take it easy.

- Yeah, David, just calm down.

I'll get to the game.

Don't worry.

- Like you did last
week, I suppose.

- What happened last week?

- He begged us all week
to let him be bat boy,

and then when it finally
came time for the game,

he didn't show up.

- Well, I got there before
the game started, didn't I?

- Well, if he got there before
the game started, David?

- Naturally.
He had all the bats.

That's a true story, too.

- Why didn't you get
there on time, dear?

- I don't know.

I just didn't realize
what time it was.

- Well, you've got to learn
to organize yourself, son.

Time is a precious commodity,
and when you're late,

you not only waste
your own time,

but you waste the time of
other people around you.

The old expression of
knowing what time it is

has a lot of ramifications.

- Hey, that'd make a good
subject for your speech today,

Pop.

- What speech is that?

- At the sports luncheon.

Don't tell me you forgot.

- Oh.

Oh, no, no, no.

You're sure that
speech is today?

- Oh, sure, Pop.

- I didn't know you were
going to make a speech.

- Well, it's not
exactly a speech.

See, the baseball coach
just wanted the fathers

to say a few words
at the luncheon.

You sure that's today, Dave?

- Oh, sure.

It's the last sports
luncheon of the season.

- You gonna give a lecture, Pop?

- Oh, don't be silly.

It's not a lecture.

- What are you
gonna speak about?

- Well, I'm not sure yet,
but I'll think of something.

- I think that stuff about
being on time is good.

- Yeah, it might be at that.

You know, the
importance of being

on time for athletic events and
having things well-organized.

- Yes, that is a good subject.

It could also apply to getting
things organized in the home,

don't you think?

- Yeah, I suppose it could
apply to almost anything.

- Well, I was thinking about
the house in particular.

You know, organizing
things, getting things done.

- Now wait a minute,
I didn't say anything

about getting things done.

- I know, but I did.

I thought as long as you
were talking about time,

it's about time you
got around to fixing

that light on the back porch.

- You mean today?

- Well, there's no
time like the present.

- Oh, I'll have to get a
new socket and everything.

- Oh, I have a new
one in the pantry.

All you have to do is put it in.

- Oh.

Well, thank you, I guess.

- You're welcome.

- And there's no chance
of my getting out of this?

- Not much.

- Sounds like you
can't get away, Pop.

You're a prisoner.

- Yeah, and Mom sure makes
a pretty good warden, boy.

- What do you mean pretty good?

- Well, he means you're a
pretty warden and a good warden.

Don't you, Rick?

- How'd you guess, Pop?

- Oh, he's a pretty
fair diplomat himself,

but I'm afraid it
won't work this time.

- Well, I suppose I might
as well get out on the porch

and get it over with.

- Aren't you gonna
eat your French toast?

- Well, just bring it out and
slide it through the bars,

warden.

[music playing]

What am I laughing at?

[music playing]

- Holy mackerel.

What are you doing, Oz?

- What does it look
like I'm doing?

- Well, it looks
like you're making

a mess out of your back porch.

- I'm fixing this light.

- Well, it's about time.

That light hasn't
worked in over a year.

- It's gonna work now.

Thank you.

Would you hand me the
screwdriver, please?

Thanks a lot.

- How'd Harriet trick
you into fixing it?

- Oh, she didn't trick me.

I tricked myself.

- Say, you're a pretty
clever guy, aren't you?

- Oh, I don't mess around, boy.

- You better not mess
around that socket

with that screwdriver.

Your messing around
days will be over.

- Oh, no, no, I turned
off the house current.

I know enough for that.

- Say, you're a real young
Tom Edison, aren't ya?

- Oh, I wouldn't
say that, Thorny.

- Neither would I. But we got
a busted lamp over at my place,

and I thought maybe a little
flattery might get you over

to fix it.

- Well, ordinarily I would, but
I'm a little cramped for time

today.

I'm gonna make a speech over at
the sports luncheon this noon.

- No kidding?

Say, you're really on the
sucker list today, aren't ya?

- Well, it isn't
exactly a formal speech.

I'm just gonna stop by and
say a few well-chosen words.

- That's even worse.

Sounds like a lecture to me.

- No, no, no.

I've given my lecture
for this morning.

- Yeah?

Who was the unhappy victim?

- Well, I don't think you'd
call it a lecture exactly.

- Come on now, who was it?
Harriet?

- Oh, you know I
never lecture Harriet.

- Usually pick on one of the
boys 'cause they're too small

to fight back.

- You kidding?

Have you taken a good
look at David recently?

He's a big guy.

- OK, so you're
living dangerously,

and you gave David
a lecture, huh?

- No, I decided to play it safe
and give the lecture to Ricky.

Besides, he was the
one who needed it.

- Yeah?

In what way?

- Well, the kid has
suddenly developed a habit

of being late for everything.

He has absolutely no
conception of the time.

- Well, so what, Oz?

He's only a kid.

- I think it's about
time he developed

a sense of responsibility.

I mean, realize that other
people depend on him.

- I was the same way
when I was a kid,

until one day my father gave me
something that straightened me

right out.

- Oh yeah, but I think spanking
is a little old-fashioned.

- I mean he gave me a watch.

Not an expensive one, just
a moderately priced watch.

But it told time and
that's all that mattered.

- Oh, say, that's an idea.

I could run down right
now and buy him a watch.

- Oz, he'd love it.

- Yeah.

I think I'll do that.

It's a good idea.

- Thanks.

And believe me, they
last a long time, too.

I had mine till
I got to college.

Then I finally had
to get rid of it.

- Well, what happened?

Did it break down?

- No, no, it was running fine.

But I just got a
little self-conscious

when the fellas around
the fraternity house

started calling me Mickey Mouse.

[music playing]

- Oh, hi, Rick.

How was the game?

- Fine, I guess.

- Well, didn't you play?

- No, ma'am.

Those darn guys.

They started on time.

- I'm afraid that was
your own fault, dear.

- I thought sure I'd
get there on time.

- Well, you left
the house so late,

you couldn't possibly make it.

You should have left with David.

Oh, hi, dear.
- Hi.

- Hi, Pop.

- Well, here's a young
fellow I'm looking for.

- Who, me?

- He didn't get to play in the
ball game because he was late.

- Oh.

Well, that's what I
want to see him about.

I think we have a little
something here that's

gonna remedy that situation.

Feast your eyes on this.

- Gee, a watch!

Is it a real one?

- Sure, it's a real one.

- Oh, say, that's a beauty.

Who's it for?

- Well, it's for a certain
young gentleman here.

- You mean me?

- Well, you're the only young
gentleman here, aren't you?

- Oh, be careful how
you answer that, Ricky.

It may be a trick question.

- Oh, it's no trick.

There's a second hand.

It's waterproof,
and it's shockproof.

Look at this.

- Oh, be careful of my table.

- Oh.

Here, Rick.

Listen to this.

What do you hear?

- Nothing.

Must have stopped.

- Oh, I forgot to wind it.

- That'll help.

- Yeah.

Try it on.

- Gee, thanks a lot, Pop.

Well, I betcha I'll never
be late for anything again.

[music playing]

- Hi, Pop.

- Well, hi, Dave.

Something must be
wrong with this light.

I turned it on.
Nothing happened.

- Maybe it needs a new bulb.

- Maybe so.

What are you all dressed up for?

- I have to go over
to that luncheon.

I have to be there
a little early.

- Oh, yeah, that's right.
The luncheon.

- I talked to Mr. Murchison
about your speech.

He liked the idea fine.

In fact, he wants you to be the
first speaker on the program.

- Oh, good.

That reminds me, I better
jot down a few notes.

- What you said at
breakfast this morning

sounded fine to me, Pop.

- Oh, you liked that, huh?

- Sure.

- So did I. I wish I could
remember what I said.

- It was about being on time.

- Well, yeah, I
remember that part.

What time is the luncheon?

- At 1 o'clock.
- Oh.

Well, that'll give
me plenty of time

to get something put together.

Uh, Dave?

See how this sounds
for a subject.

The importance of being on time.

- That sounds fine, Pop.

- The importance...

Dave, listen to this a second.

Gentleman, I'm here to speak
to you on a timely subject.

The importance of being on time.

That's pretty corny, isn't it?

- No, no, Pop.

Sounds fine.

Anything you say sounds fine.

Well, I'll see you
over at the lodge hall.

- Oh.
OK.

[music playing]

Importance of being on time.

- Oh, Pop?

Don't be late.

- Oh no.

[music playing]

The importance of being on time.

Gentlemen.

[music playing]

Coach.

Ladies and gentlemen
of the faculty.

[music playing]

Students, coach,
gentlemen of the faculty.

The subject of my little talk
for this luncheon for this--

Subject of my little talk is
the importance of being on time.

[music playing]

You often hear the expression
he doesn't know what time it is.

Well, that's liable to have--

[music playing]

Students, coach,
members of the faculty.

[music playing]

- At the tone, the time
will be 12:35 and 1/4.

- That's right.

- Ricky?

- I'm in here, Mom.

- At the tone, the time
will be 12:35 and 1/2.

- That's right.

- What are you doing?

- I'm just making sure the
telephone company gives

the people the right time.

The operator hadn't
made a mistake yet.

I guess she must have a
pretty good watch, too.

- You better hang up now.

Somebody may be
trying to call us.

- OK.
Just one more time, Mom.

- At the tone, the time
will be 12:35 and 3/4.

- Yeah, that's right.

- Here, come on.

Move over.

I want to plug-in
the vacuum cleaner.

- Well, this sure
is a swell watch.

I bet you I'll never be
late for anything again.

- That's fine.

- Gee, I wish I had
something to do today,

so I could be on time for it.

- That's funny.

- What's the matter, Mom?

- Well, something seems to be
wrong with the vacuum cleaner.

- Harriet, can I read
something to you?

- Yeah, what's that?

- The talk I'm gonna give
at the luncheon today.

See how this sounds.

Since the beginning of
time, men have been late.

Do you like that?

- Yes, it's very good.

It's a short speech
but to the point.

- There's more.

That's just my opening line.

- Oh, I thought you were
only gonna say a few words?

Judging from this manuscript,
you've prepared a sermon.

- No, no, this is
just a rough draft.

Naturally, I plan to go over it
and cut out one or two pages.

- Don't you think
you better hurry?

What time's the luncheon start?

- Not until 1 o'clock.

I got plenty of time.

It's only-- It's only 11.

- That clock isn't right, Pop.

- Well, of course it's right.

That's an electric clock.

- I'm afraid it's wrong, Pop.
I know.

I got a watch.

- You can take Ricky's
word for it, dear.

He's been listening to the time
signal for the last half hour.

- Well, I know,
Harriet, but you can

see it says 11 o'clock
right on the nose.

Wait a minute.

Come to think of it, it
said 11 o'clock on the nose

when I was in here
about 15 minutes ago.

- It said 11
o'clock an hour ago.

- Take a look at it.

That clock is stopped.

- You know, something must
be wrong with the power.

The vacuum cleaner
doesn't work, either.

- Oh.

Well, I don't know.

I wonder what it could be.

- Could it be something
that you did when you

were fixing the porch light?

- No, I just turned
off the electricity

and fixed the light.

And I-- You know, it's possible
that I neglected to turn

the electricity--

that's exactly it.

- Well, that's an easy
mistake for anybody to make.

- Well.

Say, wait a minute.

If that clock is stopped,
I wonder what time it is.

- Would you like me to tell you?

- Oh, yes, please do.

- At the tone,
the time will be--

- Ricky, what time is it?

- 10 minutes to 1:00.

- 10 minutes to 1:00?!

Holy smokes!

That gives me just
10 minutes to get

cleaned up, shaved,
dressed, and all the way

over to the lodge auditorium.

I can't possibly make it.

- Well, just get over
there as soon as you can.

- Oh, this is gonna
be very embarrassing.

I go all the way over
there and make a speech

on the importance
of being on time,

and I'm late for the speech.

- Well, you got nine minutes
and 30 seconds now, Pop.

- Well, come on, dear.

If you hurry, you
won't be too late.

Those luncheons never
start on time, anyway.

- This'll probably be the
first one in history that does!

- Well, the longer you wait,
the later you're gonna be.

- Nine minutes and five seconds.

- But, Harriet--
- Come on.

No more stalling now.

- Nine minutes
and three seconds.

- OK.
OK.

I'm going.

[music playing]

- Ozzie, are you about ready?

- I'll be right there.

- You've got 30 seconds, Pop.

- OK, I'm coming.

- Well, you better hurry.

- I'm hurrying as fast as I can.

- You've got 25 seconds, Pop.

[music playing]

- I didn't have time to
shave, but I think I look OK.

- You look fine, dear.

- 20 seconds, Pop.

[music playing]

- You know, I don't
think I oughta

go to the luncheon at all.
- Well, you've got to go.

They're expecting you to speak.

- 10 seconds, Pop.

- Thank you, son.

- You can't let David down.

- Well, Harriet, I've
already let him down.

Why don't we phone them
and tell them I'm sick?

- We?

- Why don't you phone them?

- Oh, no.

- Well, Harriet, you've got to.

I'm much too sick to phone.

- Pop?

- Yes, son?

- You're late.

[phone ringing]

- Harriet, answer it, and
tell 'em I'm on my way.

- All right.

You get going, and I'll
be telling the truth.

- No, wait a minute.

Let it ring.

They've got a lot of nerve
hounding me like this just

because I'm a few seconds late.

- 30 seconds late to be exact.

- You better get going, dear.

- Harriet, I just can't go down
there and face those people.

- Well, you've got to.
Maybe I better answer the phone.

- No, no, no.

Let it ring.

They don't have to call
me to tell me I'm late.

I know I'm late.

I've got a small son
here with a watch.

- Here's your coat, dear.

- Hey, wait a minute.

This may work out after all.

I'm late, right?

- Right.

- 59 seconds.

- Well, thank you, Ricky.

See, I'm late to
a luncheon where

I'm gonna speak on the
importance of being on time.

You get what I'm driving at?

- No.

- Well, I'm going to be
the example of what happens

to a man when he's late.

You get it?

- No.

- Well, look, by being late,
I point up exactly what

I'm gonna talk about.

I'm a graphic
illustration of my speech.

I'm the horrible example of
the confusion and embarrassment

that occurs when a man is late.

- Now I get it.

- Do you like it?

- No.

- Harriet, believe me, this
is positively brilliant.

Maybe it isn't brilliant,
but it certainly

is an unusual way
of maneuvering out

of an embarrassing situation.

- Well, it may be a
pretty good idea at that.

Come on, get on your
coat and get going.

- No, no, no.

The later I am now, the better.

The perfect dramatic effect
is for me to arrive just

after they've finished lunch.

Mr. Murchison, the
chairman, rises and looks

around the hall in a
bewildered sort of a way.

He taps on his water glass,
and he says, "Gentlemen,

I can't imagine what's
happened to our first speaker

for today."

Believe me, this is
brilliant, Harriet.

[music playing]

Gentlemen, I can't
imagine what's

happened to our first
speaker for today,

but I'm sure if you'll bear
with me for a few moments--

- It's all right.
Here I am, sir.

- Oh, thank goodness.

We were getting worried.

- Gentlemen, I have committed
an unforgivable act.

I have been late for
this important luncheon.

30 minutes late to be exact.

There's no excuse for
my thoughtlessness.

By being late, I have not only
caused a lot of confusion,

I have inconvenienced
all of you.

- Oh, that's
perfectly all right.

We understand.

- You're very kind, sir,
but it isn't all right.

It's a terrible thing to do.

Now, I must apologize.

Naturally, this is
embarrassing to me,

and it's embarrassing to you.

Believe me, gentlemen,
I sincerely and humbly

apologize for my rudeness.

You have just witnessed what
happens when a man is late.

Confusion, inconvenience,
embarrassment

for all concerned.

Now I can tell you that this
was my way of illustrating

the subject of my little
talk for this luncheon:

the importance of being on time.

I hope you'll forgive this
rather dramatic presentation.

- Professor, professor.

- I beg your pardon?

- I hate to interrupt,
but I thought you

were speaking on Plato today?

- Well, no, David
told me he mentioned

the topic of my speech, and
you were very happy with it.

- David?

Who's David?

- Well, my son, Mr. Murchison.

- Mr. Murchison?

Who is Mr. Murchison?

- Well, aren't
you Mr. Murchison?

- No, I'm Dr. Pepin.

Who are you?

- Well, I'm Ozzie Nelson.

- You mean you want
Professor Higgins?

- No, I'm sure I'm Ozzie Nelson.

You mean you aren't
Mr. Murchison?

- No, I'm Dr. Pepin.

- Where's Mr. Murchison?
- I don't know.

Where's Professor Higgins?

- Well, I don't know.

Where am I?

- You're at the semi-annual
luncheon of the Philocalian

Literary Society.

- Do you mean this isn't
the High School Athletic

Association luncheon?

- Of course not.

Now, what have you done
with Professor Higgins?

- Gentlemen, I'm terribly sorry.

My bus was delayed, but I got
here just as soon as possible.

- Oh, Mr. Murchison?
- No.

Dr. Pepin?
- No.

- I'm Dr. Pepin.

- I'm Professor Higgins.

- Oh, I'm Ozzie Nelson.

Have you seen Mr. Murchison?

- No.

[music playing]

- Pardon me, gentlemen.

[music playing]

David?

- Oh, hi, Pop.

I've been looking all
over the lobby for you.

- Where is everybody?

- The luncheon had to
be postponed until 2:30.

- Oh, what happened?

- Well, somebody got
the plans all mixed up.

Some literary society's using
the dining hall right now.

- Oh, yes, I've met them.

- I phoned home, but
nobody was there.

- Oh, you were the
one who phoned?

- Yeah.

How come you didn't answer?

- I'd already left.

This has really been
a frantic day so far.

- It sure has.

The luncheon starts in about an
hour, so we better get going.

- Well, Dave, where
are you going?

- Where everybody else has
gone, home to get some lunch.

I can't wait until 2:30.

- Oh, well, you'd
better leave me.

I'm not sure I can
find my way home today.

[music playing]

Oh, is dinner near ready?

I'm starved.

- Yeah, just about.

- I had quite a day today.

- David told me your
speech was a big success.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

Yeah, they seemed to like it.

It's unusual, I guess.

- Well, you just relax.

That dinner will be
ready in a few minutes.

[phone rings]

- Hello?

- Hello, Mr. Nelson?

- Yes?

- This is Dr. Pepin from the
Philocalian Literary Society.

- Oh, yes.

Say, I'm terribly sorry about
that little mix-up today.

- Oh, that's
perfectly all right.

I have a rather unusual
request to make, Mr. Nelson.

- What's that, Dr. Pepin?

- I'm afraid this
is going to sound

like a bit of an imposition.

- No, no, no, not at all.

- Well, all the members
are so anxious to hear

how your speech ends
that I wonder if you'd

speak at our next meeting?

[music playing]

- Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

will be brought to you by
Hotpoint quality appliances.

Remember, Hotpoint changes
your viewpoint automatically.

[music playing]

The girl on the telephone
was Barbara Iler.

Dr. Pepin was played
by Joseph Kearns.

Professor Higgins
was Francis Pirlo.

This is Verne Smith speaking.

Don't forget that a
completely different episode

of "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday
night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for
time and radio station.

[music playing]