All language subtitles for Teachers (2016) S02E17 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 2 0 x264-TrollHD_track3_[eng]
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1
00:00:06,967 --> 00:00:11,100
[classy piano music]
2
00:00:11,167 --> 00:00:12,767
- Thanks for
another great date.
3
00:00:12,833 --> 00:00:17,800
Here's to many, many, many,
many, many, many more.
4
00:00:17,867 --> 00:00:19,933
To us.
5
00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:22,067
To us!
[women laugh]
6
00:00:22,133 --> 00:00:25,933
Oh. Mmm.
Are you gonna eat those shrimps?
7
00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:28,267
Ugh, I friggin' love shrimp.
8
00:00:28,333 --> 00:00:30,633
Mmm, mmm, mmm. Mmm.
9
00:00:30,700 --> 00:00:33,633
[rock music]
10
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:34,600
* *
11
00:00:34,667 --> 00:00:37,233
- * Tear it down *
12
00:00:39,533 --> 00:00:41,433
[squish]
13
00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:46,500
- Who keeps pooping
in the hallway?
14
00:00:46,567 --> 00:00:48,000
- Ding-dong.
15
00:00:48,067 --> 00:00:52,800
I have a delivery here
for Ms. Mary Louise Bennigan.
16
00:00:52,867 --> 00:00:55,633
- That's me.
I'm Ms. Mary Louise Bennigan.
17
00:00:55,700 --> 00:00:56,700
And your name is?
18
00:00:56,767 --> 00:00:58,600
Just kidding.
I know you're name.
19
00:00:58,667 --> 00:01:01,500
[gasps] Wow.
These are beautiful.
20
00:01:01,567 --> 00:01:04,233
You must've gotten these
from a really fancy supermarket.
21
00:01:04,300 --> 00:01:05,433
- Ah, I went to a florist.
22
00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:07,300
- Oh, I can't take these.
23
00:01:07,367 --> 00:01:09,700
- They're yours.
- Ah, I feel like I can't.
24
00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:13,067
Yes!
25
00:01:13,100 --> 00:01:14,500
- Well, I came by to see
26
00:01:14,567 --> 00:01:16,733
if you would like
to go out again tonight.
27
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,100
- I'd love to.
28
00:01:18,167 --> 00:01:19,633
Let me check and see
if Chelsea's free.
29
00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:22,567
- Uh, actually, I wanted
to talk to you about that.
30
00:01:22,633 --> 00:01:24,067
I know Chelsea's
your friend--
31
00:01:24,067 --> 00:01:25,400
- Best friend.
- Right.
32
00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:27,300
But she's been on most
of our dates so far.
33
00:01:27,367 --> 00:01:28,567
- Just four.
- Out of five.
34
00:01:28,633 --> 00:01:31,067
And I was wondering
if tonight,
35
00:01:31,067 --> 00:01:32,833
it could just be
the two of us.
36
00:01:32,900 --> 00:01:35,333
- I'd love that,
but I don't think Chelsea
37
00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:36,667
has anything else
lined up.
38
00:01:36,733 --> 00:01:38,600
And she just got
kicked off Tinder
39
00:01:38,667 --> 00:01:42,067
for having all three private
areas as her profile picture.
40
00:01:42,067 --> 00:01:44,067
- Wow.
41
00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:46,667
Uh, well, I'm sure
she'll be fine.
42
00:01:46,733 --> 00:01:50,333
She is an adult.
- She prefers advanced teen.
43
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:51,800
This is gonna be rough.
44
00:01:51,867 --> 00:01:53,967
- Oh, this happens
every year.
45
00:01:54,067 --> 00:01:56,167
That was the third rogue poop
this week.
46
00:01:56,233 --> 00:01:57,533
- Actually, fourth.
47
00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:59,800
Mr. Spinnoli stepped
in a hot human turd.
48
00:01:59,867 --> 00:02:02,567
That's why
he stopped wearing Tevas.
49
00:02:02,633 --> 00:02:04,600
- It's got to be
Bradley G.
50
00:02:04,667 --> 00:02:07,800
He and his friends pooped
all over the school last year.
51
00:02:07,867 --> 00:02:09,267
I've got a plan.
52
00:02:09,333 --> 00:02:11,400
We'll monitor
all the boys in school,
53
00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:12,967
listen in
on their conversations,
54
00:02:13,067 --> 00:02:15,067
search their desks,
watch their online activity,
55
00:02:15,100 --> 00:02:16,567
do whatever it takes.
56
00:02:16,633 --> 00:02:19,067
- Isn't that kind of an invasion
of their privacy?
57
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:21,567
- [scoffs] Students' rights
don't mean diddly
58
00:02:21,633 --> 00:02:23,933
when there's
a poop terrorist.
59
00:02:24,067 --> 00:02:27,333
- And remember, when it comes
to Georgia O'Keeffe...
60
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:29,567
all:
It's never just a flower.
61
00:02:29,633 --> 00:02:32,733
- Excellent.
Great job, guys.
62
00:02:34,367 --> 00:02:36,100
- Oh.
63
00:02:36,167 --> 00:02:38,733
[screams]
- No, Caroline, don't!
64
00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:42,133
[gasps]
65
00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:44,800
- What?
It was a cockroach.
66
00:02:44,867 --> 00:02:46,467
- Murderer.
67
00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:49,233
[suspenseful music]
68
00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:51,800
- Security checkpoint, boys.
69
00:02:51,867 --> 00:02:53,400
- Why didn't you stop
those girls?
70
00:02:53,467 --> 00:02:54,967
- Because the girls
71
00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:57,067
weren't brought up in a culture
that glorifies poop.
72
00:02:57,133 --> 00:02:58,567
Now empty your pockets.
73
00:02:58,633 --> 00:03:00,400
So you know what
you're looking for?
74
00:03:00,467 --> 00:03:01,933
- Anything having to do
with poop,
75
00:03:02,067 --> 00:03:04,700
number two, dookie, doo-doo.
- You got it.
76
00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:06,367
- But butter, Lincoln logs,
77
00:03:06,433 --> 00:03:08,133
chocolate thunder,
human Tootsie Rolls.
78
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:09,400
- Yeah, I said you got it.
79
00:03:09,467 --> 00:03:11,067
What's in the lunch box,
Terrence?
80
00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:12,300
- My lunch.
81
00:03:12,367 --> 00:03:13,500
- Really?
82
00:03:13,567 --> 00:03:16,633
[scoffs]
Shredded Wheat?
83
00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:18,933
Pretty high-fiber snack here,
Terrence.
84
00:03:19,067 --> 00:03:22,567
You planning on using this
at both ends today?
85
00:03:25,533 --> 00:03:28,067
- I have got to get
ass implants.
86
00:03:28,133 --> 00:03:30,433
- Hey, there, Chelse-a-roo.
87
00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:32,833
How's it hanging,
girlfriend?
88
00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:34,800
- Why are you
acting strange?
89
00:03:34,867 --> 00:03:37,067
[gasps] Did you and Hot Dad
do butt stuff?
90
00:03:37,100 --> 00:03:39,733
Ugh, I told you
you'd feel weird the next day.
91
00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:42,633
- What? No. I never--
I never.
92
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:46,500
Uh, but I did talk to him
this morning, and tonight--
93
00:03:46,567 --> 00:03:48,067
He's joining us to watch
94
00:03:48,133 --> 00:03:49,767
"Teen Mom Where Are They Now:
Regular Moms"?
95
00:03:49,833 --> 00:03:51,233
Oh, I forgot it's Tuesday.
- That's perfect.
96
00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:52,633
Afterwards, you and Hot Dad
97
00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:54,267
can help us assemble
my new bookshelf.
98
00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:56,267
And then I'm gonna buy books
for it so I look smart.
99
00:03:56,333 --> 00:03:58,600
I really want to start picking
up tech-industry guys.
100
00:03:58,667 --> 00:04:00,067
- He and I already made plans
101
00:04:00,133 --> 00:04:01,800
to go to the Great American
Pasta Company.
102
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:03,667
- Okay, we can do that
instead.
103
00:04:03,733 --> 00:04:06,933
- Actually, I was thinking it
could just be the two of us.
104
00:04:07,067 --> 00:04:09,867
It's just now
that we're dating,
105
00:04:09,933 --> 00:04:11,867
we need to spend some time
together alone
106
00:04:11,933 --> 00:04:14,900
to see what our relationship
is like with--
107
00:04:14,967 --> 00:04:16,367
without you.
108
00:04:16,433 --> 00:04:18,767
- So you're bailing on me?
109
00:04:18,833 --> 00:04:21,533
Whatever. I'll just spend
the night by myself.
110
00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:23,200
Everyone needs a little bit
of alone time--
111
00:04:23,267 --> 00:04:25,533
like Kim Kardashian
after she got robbed in Paris.
112
00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:28,067
[both chuckle]
113
00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:31,067
[romantic music]
114
00:04:31,067 --> 00:04:38,100
* *
115
00:04:53,967 --> 00:04:54,933
- Chelsea?
116
00:04:55,067 --> 00:04:57,367
- Oh, my God.
117
00:04:57,433 --> 00:04:59,067
Mary Louise?
118
00:04:59,133 --> 00:05:00,667
Is that you?
119
00:05:00,733 --> 00:05:02,267
Ugh, I don't have
my contacts in.
120
00:05:02,333 --> 00:05:03,633
What are you doing here?
121
00:05:03,700 --> 00:05:05,200
- We're on our date.
122
00:05:05,267 --> 00:05:06,500
- What a coincidence.
123
00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:08,333
Armen and I are here
on a date, too.
124
00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:10,600
[laughs]
It's his favorite restaurant.
125
00:05:10,667 --> 00:05:12,600
You guys have a good night.
126
00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,367
[chuckles]
127
00:05:16,433 --> 00:05:20,600
- Uh, just so you know, my break
is only 15 minutes.
128
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:23,667
- Okay, Dane Cook.
[laughing]
129
00:05:23,733 --> 00:05:24,967
I am not leaving
here tonight
130
00:05:25,067 --> 00:05:28,233
without a hot stock tip
from you.
131
00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:30,533
- I'm sorry. I don't know
what you're talking about.
132
00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:32,133
- Yes, you do.
133
00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,767
Don't think I don't know
that you golf with the mayor.
134
00:05:34,833 --> 00:05:36,433
[laughs]
135
00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:38,600
- Hey, blue Volvo.
136
00:05:38,667 --> 00:05:40,900
- I'm so sorry.
I got to get back to work.
137
00:05:40,967 --> 00:05:42,067
- Oh.
138
00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:47,767
Okay. Okay.
139
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:02,067
- Chelsea?
- Hmm?
140
00:06:02,067 --> 00:06:03,733
- Would you like to join us?
141
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,333
- Oh, I don't want to impose.
142
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,833
Okay, fine.
[laughs]
143
00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:14,067
Oh, I cannot get enough
of these shrimp.
144
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:16,267
Oh! Mmm.
145
00:06:18,100 --> 00:06:19,367
Mmm.
146
00:06:19,433 --> 00:06:21,900
Ooh, baby. [chuckles]
That's a cheap wine.
147
00:06:24,267 --> 00:06:25,300
[rock music]
148
00:06:25,367 --> 00:06:26,900
- Cecilia freaked out
149
00:06:26,967 --> 00:06:29,533
and called me a murderer
for killing some dumb bug.
150
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:31,167
- Don't sweat it.
151
00:06:31,233 --> 00:06:33,067
She called me the same thing
when I peeled an orange.
152
00:06:33,100 --> 00:06:35,100
Hey, girl. Pasta?
153
00:06:35,167 --> 00:06:38,900
- Chelsea, I can't believe
you crashed our date.
154
00:06:38,967 --> 00:06:40,533
- I can't help it that you went
to my favorite restaurant.
155
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,933
- You hate that place.
156
00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:43,933
You said that
Great American Pasta Company
157
00:06:44,067 --> 00:06:45,933
was for fat
Italian trash.
158
00:06:46,067 --> 00:06:47,767
- No, I said it was for fat
trash who want to be Italian.
159
00:06:47,833 --> 00:06:49,533
- I know your date
was the valet.
160
00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:51,267
He got our car
when we left.
161
00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:53,167
- He just likes helping
strangers retrieve their cars,
162
00:06:53,233 --> 00:06:55,800
and he's so into it,
they gave him a uniform.
163
00:06:55,867 --> 00:06:57,533
- Okay, Chelsea,
it's really important
164
00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:59,367
that we spend time
together alone.
165
00:06:59,433 --> 00:07:00,833
- I know.
I miss you--
166
00:07:00,900 --> 00:07:02,600
- No, I mean
Hot Dad and me!
167
00:07:02,667 --> 00:07:04,133
- So now you're one
of those girls
168
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:05,500
who gets a boyfriend
and completely disappears?
169
00:07:05,567 --> 00:07:06,867
- You've literally left me
170
00:07:06,933 --> 00:07:09,067
at hundreds of bars
without a ride home.
171
00:07:09,133 --> 00:07:12,467
Just last weekend you ditched me
for a pharmaceutical sales rep.
172
00:07:12,533 --> 00:07:14,300
- He manages the entire
Midwest territory.
173
00:07:14,367 --> 00:07:16,267
What was I supposed to do--
not sleep with him?
174
00:07:16,333 --> 00:07:17,967
- Okay, you know what?
If you're gonna act like this,
175
00:07:18,067 --> 00:07:19,800
then I don't want to hang out
with you anymore.
176
00:07:19,867 --> 00:07:21,433
And don't try to win me back
177
00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,233
by saying I can sleep over
in your bed tonight,
178
00:07:23,300 --> 00:07:25,300
because we both know you never
follow through!
179
00:07:25,367 --> 00:07:27,767
- Ah!
[sighs]
180
00:07:27,833 --> 00:07:29,600
- This is really good.
181
00:07:29,667 --> 00:07:32,600
[suspenseful music]
182
00:07:32,667 --> 00:07:35,233
* *
183
00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:38,067
- New development?
- Ah, get down.
184
00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:40,433
I found this.
185
00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:42,433
An attack is imminent.
186
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:46,067
* *
187
00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:47,767
- Bradley G's
dropping a bomb!
188
00:07:47,833 --> 00:07:49,367
- Go, go, go!
189
00:07:49,433 --> 00:07:50,433
* *
190
00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:52,067
Pooper!
- Freeze!
191
00:07:52,100 --> 00:07:53,600
- Thought you
could get away with it,
192
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:55,267
didn't you, you fecal
insurgent?
193
00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:57,433
- Get away with what?
I was just tying my shoe.
194
00:07:57,500 --> 00:07:59,067
- Nice try, dude.
195
00:07:59,133 --> 00:08:01,867
We're taking you to
the detention monitoring center.
196
00:08:01,933 --> 00:08:03,433
- Please, I don't want to go
to Ditmo!
197
00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:04,833
- Move!
198
00:08:06,833 --> 00:08:09,167
- You should never kill
a living thing,
199
00:08:09,233 --> 00:08:12,133
because each and every life
is precious,
200
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,367
including a cockroach
like Kevin.
201
00:08:14,433 --> 00:08:17,500
- Kevin? Okay,
you can't be serious.
202
00:08:17,567 --> 00:08:18,667
- Oh, I am.
203
00:08:18,733 --> 00:08:20,233
You see, I knew Kevin.
204
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,167
He used to peacefully roam
these halls,
205
00:08:22,233 --> 00:08:24,633
minding his own business,
never hurting anybody.
206
00:08:24,700 --> 00:08:26,833
- He was a cockroach,
Cecilia.
207
00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:29,367
We can't be expected to live
amongst cockroaches.
208
00:08:29,433 --> 00:08:30,967
- Well, we should.
209
00:08:31,067 --> 00:08:33,667
Insects were here first,
by over 300 million years.
210
00:08:33,733 --> 00:08:35,167
So, technically,
we're on their turf.
211
00:08:35,233 --> 00:08:37,300
- Whatever.
I had to kill him.
212
00:08:37,367 --> 00:08:38,767
- Did you, Caroline?
213
00:08:38,833 --> 00:08:40,733
Or could you have just covered
him with a cup,
214
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,467
slid a piece of paper under it,
and released him into the wild?
215
00:08:43,533 --> 00:08:45,300
- Why would I ruin a cup?
216
00:08:45,367 --> 00:08:47,067
- Ms. Cannon, look.
217
00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:49,700
- Wow, Karina. That's a
beautiful depiction of Kevin.
218
00:08:49,767 --> 00:08:54,367
- He's up in Heaven with all the
other bugs Ms. Watson's killed.
219
00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:56,367
- Mass murderer.
220
00:08:56,433 --> 00:08:58,067
[high-pitched children's music
playing]
221
00:08:58,067 --> 00:08:59,867
- * We do the Spooky Shuffle *
222
00:09:00,067 --> 00:09:03,667
- Ah! Please, I can't take
this music anymore!
223
00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:05,333
It wasn't me, okay?
224
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:08,433
- You'll be in Ditmo
for an indefinite amount of time
225
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:09,933
unless you confess.
226
00:09:10,067 --> 00:09:13,067
And if you think
the "Spooky Shuffle" is bad,
227
00:09:13,133 --> 00:09:14,733
here comes
"Snap Outta My Life."
228
00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:15,867
- No.
229
00:09:15,933 --> 00:09:17,567
No, no. Aah!
230
00:09:17,633 --> 00:09:19,533
No!
231
00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,567
Why?
232
00:09:21,633 --> 00:09:24,567
- It's only a matter of time
before he breaks.
233
00:09:24,633 --> 00:09:25,933
[squish]
234
00:09:26,067 --> 00:09:28,900
- [gasps]
We got the wrong guy.
235
00:09:28,967 --> 00:09:31,500
The pooper's still
on the loose.
236
00:09:31,567 --> 00:09:32,733
- Am I...?
237
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,567
- Yeah.
238
00:09:34,633 --> 00:09:35,900
- Is it all over my back?
239
00:09:35,967 --> 00:09:37,867
- Oh, yeah,
you're covered in poop.
240
00:09:37,933 --> 00:09:39,933
[rock music]
241
00:09:40,067 --> 00:09:41,933
- Today we'll be reviewing
the place value
242
00:09:42,067 --> 00:09:43,700
for tens and hundreds.
243
00:09:43,767 --> 00:09:46,233
Although, to be honest,
until you get to the thousands,
244
00:09:46,300 --> 00:09:48,467
it's really
not that important.
245
00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:54,633
What's this?
246
00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:56,067
- Ms. Cannon put out food
247
00:09:56,067 --> 00:09:57,733
for Kevin's friends and family
248
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,433
to help them deal
with their grief.
249
00:09:59,500 --> 00:10:01,033
[cap clatters]
250
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,533
The cockroaches
are sitting shivah for Kevin.
251
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:07,167
[creepy music]
252
00:10:07,233 --> 00:10:12,200
- Cecilia!
253
00:10:12,267 --> 00:10:15,267
- Does anyone want to hang out
with me tonight?
254
00:10:15,333 --> 00:10:17,233
[school bell rings]
I'm just asking
255
00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:19,900
'cause if nobody does, then
I'll have to be alone, so...
256
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:21,267
- I'm busy.
257
00:10:21,333 --> 00:10:24,000
- Sorry, dog.
- Same. Sorry.
258
00:10:24,067 --> 00:10:26,567
- Nobody? Seriously?
259
00:10:28,833 --> 00:10:30,233
- What did you have
in mind?
260
00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:31,767
- I just want to hang out,
drink some wine,
261
00:10:31,833 --> 00:10:33,100
put together
my Swedish bookshelf.
262
00:10:33,167 --> 00:10:34,767
[chuckles]
- No, thanks. I'll pass.
263
00:10:34,833 --> 00:10:37,033
- Oh, my God.
You're turning me down?
264
00:10:38,433 --> 00:10:41,233
This is literally
the lowest moment of my life.
265
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:44,233
[traditional Italian music]
266
00:10:44,300 --> 00:10:46,133
- I know
it was hard for you,
267
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:48,400
but I really appreciate you
taking the time just for us.
268
00:10:48,467 --> 00:10:49,900
- Of course.
269
00:10:49,967 --> 00:10:52,867
You look really nice,
by the way.
270
00:10:52,933 --> 00:10:55,533
Your eyes
are as brown as...
271
00:10:57,633 --> 00:10:58,767
This meatball.
272
00:10:58,833 --> 00:11:00,600
- [laughs]
Well, thank you.
273
00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:02,467
I love meatballs,
so that's high praise.
274
00:11:02,533 --> 00:11:03,667
- [chuckles]
275
00:11:03,733 --> 00:11:05,700
- And that is a bookshelf.
276
00:11:05,767 --> 00:11:09,300
[giggles]
I did good.
277
00:11:09,367 --> 00:11:13,167
Why are there so many tiny nubs
left over?
278
00:11:13,233 --> 00:11:14,567
Whatever.
279
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:25,833
[line trilling]
280
00:11:25,900 --> 00:11:28,300
- How's that frog
you rescued doing?
281
00:11:28,367 --> 00:11:29,900
- He's better.
[cell phone vibrates]
282
00:11:29,967 --> 00:11:31,433
Yeah, it wasn't easy.
283
00:11:31,500 --> 00:11:33,300
It's really hard putting
a catheter in a frog,
284
00:11:33,367 --> 00:11:34,900
and it's nearly impossible
to get it out.
285
00:11:34,967 --> 00:11:37,067
- Yeah, you have "ribbit" out.
[giggles]
286
00:11:37,067 --> 00:11:38,967
- Yeah, if they do it too quick,
they croak.
287
00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,233
[both laugh]
288
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:42,133
- Straight to voice mail?
[scoffs]
289
00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:43,967
I should've ended our
friendship when she decided
290
00:11:44,067 --> 00:11:46,500
to do Meals on Wheels instead
of being my designated driver
291
00:11:46,567 --> 00:11:47,967
at the Women's March.
292
00:11:48,067 --> 00:11:50,267
[gasps]
293
00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:55,233
[line trilling]
294
00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:57,800
[cell phone vibrates]
- [sighs]
295
00:11:57,867 --> 00:11:59,300
I'm really sorry.
296
00:11:59,367 --> 00:12:01,367
It's just Chelsea's
called twice now,
297
00:12:01,433 --> 00:12:04,067
and I'm worried it might
be an emergency.
298
00:12:04,100 --> 00:12:05,500
Chelsea?
- It's an emergency.
299
00:12:05,567 --> 00:12:08,200
My bookshelf just fell on me,
and I'm--
300
00:12:08,267 --> 00:12:10,833
I'm--I'm kind of, like,
terrified.
301
00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:14,267
- A bookshelf? Do you really
expect me to believe that a--
302
00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:16,200
- Yeah, I know it sounds crazy,
but I'm being serious.
303
00:12:16,267 --> 00:12:17,733
I need you to come over now.
304
00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:20,067
- No, I'm on a date.
305
00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,300
- Maybe I could free myself
if I cut my hair.
306
00:12:24,367 --> 00:12:26,500
- Oh, my goodness.
I'll be right there.
307
00:12:26,567 --> 00:12:28,300
Chelsea's trapped
under a bookshelf.
308
00:12:28,367 --> 00:12:30,067
- I thought she only read
magazines.
309
00:12:30,133 --> 00:12:31,567
- Her hair's from India,
and she'd never cut it.
310
00:12:31,633 --> 00:12:33,567
I have to go and save her.
- Well, wait.
311
00:12:33,633 --> 00:12:35,567
Uh, I'll drive you.
312
00:12:35,633 --> 00:12:37,433
[rock music]
313
00:12:39,867 --> 00:12:42,067
[dance music playing]
314
00:12:42,133 --> 00:12:45,067
- [gasps]
- You guys came. Yay!
315
00:12:45,133 --> 00:12:47,200
Time to party-party.
316
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,400
[chuckles]
- You lied to me?
317
00:12:49,467 --> 00:12:51,533
- Chelsea, we really thought
you were in trouble.
318
00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:53,233
- I was, but...
319
00:12:53,300 --> 00:12:56,067
then I got Hulk strength
and had to free myself.
320
00:12:56,133 --> 00:12:57,167
Let's hang out.
321
00:12:57,233 --> 00:12:59,433
- What is wrong with you?
322
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:01,733
- Oh, Mary Louise, that's sweet,
but I'm fine.
323
00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:04,733
- That's not what I meant.
I'm in a relationship now.
324
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,533
- Oh, I know.
325
00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,900
You have made it perfectly clear
that he is your priority now.
326
00:13:08,967 --> 00:13:10,367
Meanwhile, I spent the night
alone
327
00:13:10,433 --> 00:13:11,967
putting together
a Swedish bookshelf
328
00:13:12,067 --> 00:13:13,467
with only pictures
to guide me.
329
00:13:13,533 --> 00:13:15,067
They weren't even American!
330
00:13:15,067 --> 00:13:17,067
- I've always
supported you, Chelsea.
331
00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:19,133
Who always orders two entrées
so you can say,
332
00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:20,500
"I'm not hungry,
I'll nibble"?
333
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:22,767
Who pretended to be
a 15-year-old
334
00:13:22,833 --> 00:13:24,767
so you could convince that
handsome social worker
335
00:13:24,833 --> 00:13:27,233
that you were a volunteer
for the Big Sisters program?
336
00:13:27,300 --> 00:13:30,600
Who told everyone that you had
an allergy attack
337
00:13:30,667 --> 00:13:33,067
when you got
the bad Botox in Mexico?
338
00:13:33,133 --> 00:13:36,533
- That wasn't Botox. That was a
Mexican facial-paralysis serum.
339
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:40,800
- The one time I needed you
to support me, you couldn't.
340
00:13:40,867 --> 00:13:42,667
I'm so disappointed
in you.
341
00:13:42,733 --> 00:13:44,167
- [gasps]
342
00:13:44,233 --> 00:13:45,667
Don't say "disappointed."
343
00:13:45,733 --> 00:13:47,833
You know my mom used to say that
when I got acne.
344
00:13:47,900 --> 00:13:49,467
Wait. ML, don't go.
345
00:13:49,533 --> 00:13:51,333
Please,
just don't leave me alone.
346
00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,600
Oh.
347
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:55,433
[cries]
348
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:58,067
Oh.
[whimpers, gasps]
349
00:13:58,067 --> 00:14:00,633
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no!
350
00:14:00,700 --> 00:14:03,733
[grunting]
351
00:14:05,933 --> 00:14:07,733
ML!
352
00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:11,300
- It's like we're missing
something.
353
00:14:11,367 --> 00:14:12,900
- What could it be?
354
00:14:12,967 --> 00:14:15,067
- [sighs] Let's go back
to that first attack.
355
00:14:15,133 --> 00:14:16,400
- The number one number two?
356
00:14:16,467 --> 00:14:18,100
- [chuckles] Right.
357
00:14:18,167 --> 00:14:19,933
That hallway only leads
to and from the gym,
358
00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:22,267
so the pooper
had to be in PE.
359
00:14:22,333 --> 00:14:24,900
- Who's class was in gym
at that time?
360
00:14:24,967 --> 00:14:27,900
[suspenseful music]
361
00:14:27,967 --> 00:14:30,367
* *
362
00:14:30,433 --> 00:14:33,367
both:
Watson's.
363
00:14:33,433 --> 00:14:34,600
- Can I go home now?
364
00:14:34,667 --> 00:14:35,867
- No.
365
00:14:35,933 --> 00:14:37,400
We're gonna find something
on you.
366
00:14:37,467 --> 00:14:39,333
- But it's dark outside.
367
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,533
- Your mom and dad said we could
keep you as long as we want.
368
00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:45,100
They're making a date night
out of it.
369
00:14:47,100 --> 00:14:49,133
- [sighs]
370
00:14:51,100 --> 00:14:53,067
Come on.
371
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:55,567
Come on.
372
00:14:55,633 --> 00:14:57,200
Oh, no!
373
00:14:57,267 --> 00:14:58,767
[sighs]
374
00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:01,633
Oh, my God. I'm gonna lie here
until I die...
375
00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:03,067
in a T-shirt.
376
00:15:03,133 --> 00:15:04,800
[school bell rings]
377
00:15:04,867 --> 00:15:08,100
[rock music]
378
00:15:08,167 --> 00:15:09,900
[can hissing]
379
00:15:09,967 --> 00:15:11,733
- Did a boy from you class go
to the bathroom
380
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:13,933
during gym yesterday?
- I don't know.
381
00:15:14,067 --> 00:15:17,267
- When does your class have gym?
- Right now.
382
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,067
- What are you doing?
383
00:15:19,067 --> 00:15:20,600
- Exterminating.
384
00:15:20,667 --> 00:15:22,733
Thanks to you, my room
is completely infested.
385
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,067
- It's not infested.
386
00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:25,300
They're just living
their bug lives.
387
00:15:25,367 --> 00:15:26,533
- Are you insane?
388
00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:28,100
If you care about bugs so much,
389
00:15:28,167 --> 00:15:29,867
take them home
to your filthy yurt,
390
00:15:29,933 --> 00:15:31,067
not to our school.
391
00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:32,433
They don't belong here.
392
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:33,900
- The belong everywhere.
393
00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:36,800
These beautiful creatures
are an integral part
394
00:15:36,867 --> 00:15:38,267
of our complex ecosystem.
395
00:15:38,333 --> 00:15:39,833
[animal squeaking]
[gasps]
396
00:15:39,900 --> 00:15:41,533
Aah!
- [gasps]
397
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,167
- [gasps]
398
00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:45,833
[haunting music]
399
00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:47,367
- Mm.
400
00:15:47,433 --> 00:15:50,300
- Hey, um, have you guys seen
our class rat, Milo?
401
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:52,867
He got out, and I think I saw
him run in here.
402
00:15:52,933 --> 00:15:54,933
- Cecilia.
403
00:15:55,067 --> 00:15:56,567
- Nope. Mm-mm.
404
00:15:58,167 --> 00:16:02,067
- That has bones.
405
00:16:02,067 --> 00:16:03,967
Bones.
406
00:16:04,067 --> 00:16:06,967
[mysterious music]
407
00:16:07,067 --> 00:16:11,500
* *
408
00:16:11,567 --> 00:16:14,167
- Janine's
the poop terrorist.
409
00:16:14,233 --> 00:16:15,700
- But how?
410
00:16:15,767 --> 00:16:19,467
Who keeps pooping
in the hallway?
411
00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,667
It's got to be
Bradley G.
412
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:26,867
He and his friends pooped
all over the school last year.
413
00:16:26,933 --> 00:16:28,333
[dramatic music]
414
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:31,067
Security checkpoint, boys.
415
00:16:31,100 --> 00:16:33,233
* *
416
00:16:33,300 --> 00:16:34,500
Is it all over my back?
417
00:16:34,567 --> 00:16:36,933
- Oh, yeah, you're covered
in poop.
418
00:16:37,067 --> 00:16:39,233
- [giggles evilly]
419
00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:43,867
- Holy crap.
420
00:16:43,933 --> 00:16:47,067
- Put the turtle
back in the shell, Janine!
421
00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:48,167
* *
422
00:16:48,233 --> 00:16:49,967
- Oopsies.
423
00:16:50,067 --> 00:16:51,867
* *
424
00:16:54,233 --> 00:16:55,500
[rock music]
425
00:16:55,567 --> 00:16:57,933
- So, finally,
by the seventh call...
426
00:16:58,067 --> 00:16:59,533
- No, come on.
- We show up to the place.
427
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,133
- Yeah?
[knock at door]
428
00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:04,067
- Chelsea,
I don't want to--
429
00:17:04,100 --> 00:17:05,433
- I need to say something.
430
00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:07,267
Last night
after you both left,
431
00:17:07,333 --> 00:17:09,167
I took some time
to be by myself
432
00:17:09,233 --> 00:17:11,900
and to really reflect.
433
00:17:11,967 --> 00:17:14,733
And I realized that I am not
comfortable being alone.
434
00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:17,600
And I've probably relied
on you too much, Mary Louise.
435
00:17:17,667 --> 00:17:19,900
That is something
that I need to work on.
436
00:17:19,967 --> 00:17:21,933
I also wanted to say
that you're right.
437
00:17:22,067 --> 00:17:26,567
You've always supported me, and
it's my turn to support you.
438
00:17:26,633 --> 00:17:27,933
I am so happy for you guys.
439
00:17:28,067 --> 00:17:30,233
And I promise
that I will not bother you
440
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,833
on your dates
anymore.
441
00:17:31,900 --> 00:17:34,067
I love you, girl.
442
00:17:34,067 --> 00:17:36,600
- I love you, too.
443
00:17:36,667 --> 00:17:38,267
I'd love to have
a girls' night soon.
444
00:17:38,333 --> 00:17:39,667
Thursday?
445
00:17:39,733 --> 00:17:41,867
- [gasps] "Pursuing Polygamy"
on Lifetime?
446
00:17:41,933 --> 00:17:43,367
- Yes, please.
447
00:17:43,433 --> 00:17:45,633
[both laugh]
- I will see you then.
448
00:17:45,700 --> 00:17:48,333
[chuckles]
449
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,700
- Wait. What happened
to your back?
450
00:17:50,767 --> 00:17:52,600
- Oh, nothing.
451
00:17:52,667 --> 00:17:54,067
I just had a wild night.
452
00:17:54,067 --> 00:17:57,067
[whimpering]
Oh, I just wet myself.
453
00:17:57,067 --> 00:17:58,433
[giggles softly]
454
00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:00,367
[rock music]
455
00:18:00,433 --> 00:18:03,533
- We are the victims
of our own preconceptions.
456
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:05,333
We turned all of our focus
onto the boys,
457
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:06,767
and as a result
458
00:18:06,833 --> 00:18:08,967
missed the development
of this one lone wolf.
459
00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:12,667
- I know. Who knows how many
poops we could've stopped,
460
00:18:12,733 --> 00:18:17,167
how much encrusted footwear
we could've prevented?
461
00:18:18,567 --> 00:18:20,100
- Why did you do it, Janine?
462
00:18:20,167 --> 00:18:23,500
- Because poop is funny.
463
00:18:23,567 --> 00:18:27,700
- She pooped in the school
five times.
464
00:18:27,767 --> 00:18:30,667
- Six.
[giggling wickedly]
465
00:18:30,733 --> 00:18:33,733
[suspenseful music]
466
00:18:36,100 --> 00:18:39,067
[rock music]
467
00:18:39,100 --> 00:18:46,133
* *
468
00:18:47,067 --> 00:18:49,700
- * Tear it down *
469
00:18:49,767 --> 00:18:52,533
* Tear it down *
470
00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:55,300
* Tear it down *
471
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:59,067
* Tear it down *
472
00:18:59,100 --> 00:19:02,200
- Oh, yeah.
32945
