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1
00:00:15,033 --> 00:00:16,067
Reno dispatch!
2
00:00:16,167 --> 00:00:17,734
This is
14-David-21.
3
00:00:17,834 --> 00:00:19,367
We are east bound
on route 80
4
00:00:19,467 --> 00:00:21,834
in hot pursuit
of a white B.M.W.,
5
00:00:21,934 --> 00:00:25,467
Nevada plate:
M-D-4...
6
00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:27,033
Uh, that's
a vanity plate.
7
00:00:27,133 --> 00:00:28,334
It's a vanity plate.
8
00:00:28,434 --> 00:00:30,267
M-D-4-K.
9
00:00:30,367 --> 00:00:31,801
Doc... that means
doctor.
10
00:00:31,901 --> 00:00:35,033
Doctor...
Dr. Fork, Dr. Fork!
11
00:00:35,133 --> 00:00:36,300
Me "D" Fork.
Dr. Fork.
12
00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:37,701
Dr. Fork
me "D" Fork.
13
00:00:37,801 --> 00:00:39,801
Dr. Fork...
K-9, K-9!
14
00:00:39,901 --> 00:00:41,167
K-9 is a dog.
15
00:00:41,267 --> 00:00:42,400
Dog...
Doctor for canines!
16
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:43,434
He's a vet!
He's a vet!
17
00:00:43,534 --> 00:00:44,434
Look out, look...
18
00:00:44,534 --> 00:00:45,801
( Crashing )
19
00:00:45,901 --> 00:00:49,601
( Sirens blaring )
20
00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:54,334
Oh ho, oh, ho-ho!
21
00:00:54,434 --> 00:00:58,567
( Police radio chatter )
22
00:00:59,567 --> 00:01:01,868
Aggghhhh!
23
00:01:01,968 --> 00:01:04,300
Here you go...
Lal-la, yeah...
24
00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:08,567
( Screaming )
25
00:01:08,667 --> 00:01:09,567
( Man on radio )
2-3, Roger, Roger!
26
00:01:09,667 --> 00:01:10,567
Shots fired!
27
00:01:10,667 --> 00:01:12,801
Oh-ho-ho!
28
00:01:12,901 --> 00:01:16,667
( Police radio chatter )
29
00:01:22,234 --> 00:01:23,901
( Sirens blaring )
30
00:01:26,767 --> 00:01:27,567
( Dangle )
Garcia.
31
00:01:27,667 --> 00:01:29,167
( Garcia )
Thank you.
32
00:01:29,267 --> 00:01:30,701
Uh... don't
know who's doing it.
33
00:01:30,801 --> 00:01:32,634
Uh, I brought some
tamales, homemade,
34
00:01:32,734 --> 00:01:34,467
mom made 'em.
35
00:01:34,567 --> 00:01:35,634
Uh, put 'em in
the fridge.
36
00:01:35,734 --> 00:01:37,634
Now I have found
they're mussed up.
37
00:01:37,734 --> 00:01:39,234
Fingerprints on 'em.
38
00:01:39,334 --> 00:01:41,234
Don't know who it is,
don't want to know.
39
00:01:41,334 --> 00:01:44,167
All I'm sayin' is keep
your goddamn ( Blank ) mitts
40
00:01:44,267 --> 00:01:46,000
off my tamales, okay?
41
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:47,367
Now that you're
pointing fingers,
42
00:01:47,467 --> 00:01:49,801
I'd like to know who took
the fingerprint dusting kit
43
00:01:49,901 --> 00:01:51,601
out of the fingerprint area.
44
00:01:51,701 --> 00:01:54,100
All of a sudden, there were
fingerprints on your tamales.
45
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:55,934
How did you check
that, T.J. Hooker?
46
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,834
Well, it should not
be to the point
47
00:01:57,934 --> 00:02:00,667
where I have
to check it, MacGyver.
48
00:02:00,767 --> 00:02:02,767
MacGyver was not
a police officer.
49
00:02:02,868 --> 00:02:04,434
Well, he was
an investigator.
50
00:02:04,534 --> 00:02:05,901
No, he was not.
Yes, he was.
51
00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,734
( Jones ) He was an inventor,
he was an inven...
52
00:02:07,834 --> 00:02:09,968
Well, you know,
the guy I meant was Matlock.
53
00:02:10,067 --> 00:02:10,801
That's who I meant.
54
00:02:10,901 --> 00:02:11,934
Matlock... fine.
55
00:02:12,033 --> 00:02:13,601
Matlock's a detective,
that's different.
56
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:15,701
Quiet down, maude.
57
00:02:15,801 --> 00:02:17,767
( Laughing )
58
00:02:17,868 --> 00:02:19,300
She's way off!
59
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,133
That's a sitcom.
60
00:02:21,234 --> 00:02:23,200
You are on
the moon, Wiegel.
61
00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:24,434
I'm sorry.
62
00:02:24,534 --> 00:02:26,767
Okay, people this
just came down
63
00:02:26,868 --> 00:02:28,634
from the very
tippety-top brass.
64
00:02:28,734 --> 00:02:31,400
Mayor Juarez, our
honorable mayor...
65
00:02:31,501 --> 00:02:33,868
His son, Jaime,
blew off his thumb,
66
00:02:33,968 --> 00:02:38,400
uh, with an illegal
M-80 firework.
67
00:02:38,501 --> 00:02:40,701
So, yeah, the heat
is really coming down.
68
00:02:40,801 --> 00:02:41,834
We gotta put a stop to it.
69
00:02:41,934 --> 00:02:43,534
We gotta put a stop
to it now.
70
00:02:43,634 --> 00:02:45,400
Wasn't Matlock
a lawyer?
71
00:02:45,501 --> 00:02:47,000
( Bleep )
Matlock was a lawyer.
72
00:02:52,701 --> 00:02:53,701
Hey, Karl.
Hey, Karl.
73
00:02:53,801 --> 00:02:55,334
Hey, how's it going?
74
00:02:55,434 --> 00:02:58,767
How you doing
there, buddy?
75
00:02:58,868 --> 00:02:59,767
I'm doing okay.
76
00:02:59,868 --> 00:03:00,868
You know why
we out here?
77
00:03:00,968 --> 00:03:02,567
For the festival?
78
00:03:02,667 --> 00:03:04,734
For what festival?
79
00:03:04,834 --> 00:03:06,601
For the...
80
00:03:06,701 --> 00:03:09,300
Show of light...
Parade.
81
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:10,501
The show
of light parade?
82
00:03:10,601 --> 00:03:13,634
I'm making a surfboard
for my cactus beetle.
83
00:03:13,734 --> 00:03:15,934
We out here because
we got a call
84
00:03:16,033 --> 00:03:18,200
that you was
letting off fireworks.
85
00:03:18,300 --> 00:03:21,300
Nah.
Is that true, Karl?
86
00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:22,667
Is that
the show of light?
87
00:03:22,767 --> 00:03:25,534
We do it at night,
but, uh,
88
00:03:25,634 --> 00:03:27,167
I ain't got
no fireworks.
89
00:03:27,267 --> 00:03:28,701
Were did you get
the fireworks, Karl?
90
00:03:28,801 --> 00:03:30,434
You got
"black cats" here...
91
00:03:30,534 --> 00:03:33,701
The magic van... you guys are
a couple of black cats.
92
00:03:33,801 --> 00:03:35,801
You know, "jumping Jacks"
are illegal here
93
00:03:35,901 --> 00:03:37,567
in the state of Nevada.
94
00:03:37,667 --> 00:03:39,601
You mean
the calisthenics?
95
00:03:39,701 --> 00:03:43,567
♪ You know, you look
like somebody I know ♪
96
00:03:43,667 --> 00:03:45,767
What are you...
What are you singing?
97
00:03:45,868 --> 00:03:48,767
She looks like
Shirley Hemphill
98
00:03:48,868 --> 00:03:50,834
from "What's happening!!"
99
00:03:50,934 --> 00:03:52,133
Okay,
all right.
100
00:03:52,234 --> 00:03:53,667
You know what?
I'm gonna leave.
101
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:54,901
"Hey, Dwayne."
102
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:56,367
I'm gonna show you
what's happening.
103
00:03:56,467 --> 00:03:57,534
This is
what's happening.
104
00:03:57,634 --> 00:03:59,234
No!
Huh?
105
00:03:59,334 --> 00:04:01,167
That's not
cinnamon!
106
00:04:01,267 --> 00:04:02,501
That's
what's happening.
107
00:04:02,601 --> 00:04:04,434
That's not cinnamon.
108
00:04:04,534 --> 00:04:05,901
I think
I need a lawyer.
109
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:06,901
Okay.
110
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,834
That made my gum
taste bad.
111
00:04:08,934 --> 00:04:09,968
Let's go,
let's go.
112
00:04:10,067 --> 00:04:10,834
Are you sure we...
113
00:04:10,934 --> 00:04:12,300
No, I'm sure,
let's go.
114
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:14,834
'Cause that's
what's happening, huh?
115
00:04:14,934 --> 00:04:16,267
Hey, hey, hey!
116
00:04:16,367 --> 00:04:17,367
( Chuckling )
117
00:04:17,467 --> 00:04:18,968
When I'm wearing
this outfit
118
00:04:19,067 --> 00:04:22,834
that I got for
the prostitution sting...
119
00:04:22,934 --> 00:04:24,801
You know, I don't know how
to put this delicately,
120
00:04:24,901 --> 00:04:27,033
but what kind of
undergarments do you wear
121
00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:29,300
that aren't gonna be...
122
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:33,367
Well... is this
a lingerie type of thing?
123
00:04:33,467 --> 00:04:35,400
Oh, yeah,
this is the real deal.
124
00:04:35,501 --> 00:04:36,434
Up-the-butt
type of deal?
125
00:04:36,534 --> 00:04:38,267
Well, you should...
126
00:04:38,367 --> 00:04:41,901
You should, uh...
As my brothers used to say,
127
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,100
you should free-ball it.
128
00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:45,701
You can wear
nothing under...
129
00:04:45,801 --> 00:04:47,000
I mean, it's lingerie,
130
00:04:47,100 --> 00:04:48,467
so you don't have
to wear undergarments.
131
00:04:48,567 --> 00:04:50,734
What is "free-ball it"?
132
00:04:50,834 --> 00:04:52,534
Have you ever
worn a thong?
133
00:04:52,634 --> 00:04:53,601
A what?
134
00:04:53,701 --> 00:04:55,133
A thong.
135
00:04:55,234 --> 00:04:58,067
Yeah, when I go to
the beach, I wear thongs.
136
00:04:58,167 --> 00:04:59,234
Oh, you do?
137
00:04:59,334 --> 00:05:01,534
Never figured
you for...
138
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:03,534
Well, my feet get
burned on the sand...
139
00:05:03,634 --> 00:05:07,067
No, honey,
one of those...
140
00:05:07,167 --> 00:05:09,567
Little, uh...
Drawers...
141
00:05:09,667 --> 00:05:12,434
Like a slingshot,
goes up your bum.
142
00:05:12,534 --> 00:05:14,234
Oh, God, no.
You ever worn those?
143
00:05:14,334 --> 00:05:15,334
No, no.
144
00:05:15,434 --> 00:05:17,133
Those will give
you a yeast infection.
145
00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:19,100
Testing, testing.
146
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:20,634
( Tapping microphone )
147
00:05:20,734 --> 00:05:23,367
This is officer
Trudy Wiegel.
148
00:05:23,467 --> 00:05:27,434
It is 0-800...
149
00:05:27,534 --> 00:05:31,701
Oh...
0-1300 hours...
150
00:05:31,801 --> 00:05:34,167
Out here on 4th street.
151
00:05:34,267 --> 00:05:36,367
Doing a little
prostitution sting today.
152
00:05:36,467 --> 00:05:38,767
See if we can't
catch ourselves
153
00:05:38,868 --> 00:05:42,334
some perverts...
154
00:05:42,434 --> 00:05:44,767
Looking for
a little...
155
00:05:44,868 --> 00:05:46,067
Whoopee.
156
00:05:46,167 --> 00:05:48,000
Hey, there.
157
00:05:48,100 --> 00:05:50,334
How you
doing today?
158
00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:52,300
Can I offer you...
159
00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:53,734
Can I...
160
00:05:53,834 --> 00:05:56,000
He got scared,
he got scared.
161
00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:10,234
There they are.
162
00:06:10,334 --> 00:06:11,467
There they are.
There they are.
163
00:06:11,567 --> 00:06:12,934
Son of a bitch.
164
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:17,400
Freeze!
165
00:06:17,501 --> 00:06:18,934
Freeze right there!
166
00:06:19,033 --> 00:06:21,367
Hands over your head,
walk towards us slowly!
167
00:06:21,467 --> 00:06:23,734
Slowly, slowly...
Freeze!
168
00:06:23,834 --> 00:06:25,734
Now come forward,
come forward!
169
00:06:25,834 --> 00:06:26,734
All right, all right!
170
00:06:26,834 --> 00:06:27,801
Down on
your knees!
171
00:06:27,901 --> 00:06:29,133
Hands on your head!
172
00:06:29,234 --> 00:06:30,501
Not you, sir,
not you, sir.
173
00:06:30,601 --> 00:06:31,467
Not yet.
174
00:06:31,567 --> 00:06:33,033
Behind your head,
not on top.
175
00:06:33,133 --> 00:06:34,267
Sir, to the right...
176
00:06:34,367 --> 00:06:36,868
Hands... head...
Behind your head.
177
00:06:36,968 --> 00:06:38,100
Down on your
knees, sir.
178
00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:39,868
Do not listen to me,
listen to my partner.
179
00:06:39,968 --> 00:06:41,400
Listen to him,
not me!
180
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,267
Do not listen
to my partner!
181
00:06:43,367 --> 00:06:44,400
Listen to him!
182
00:06:44,501 --> 00:06:47,200
Get all the way down,
all the way down.
183
00:06:47,300 --> 00:06:48,734
Don't stop...
You stop your crying!
184
00:06:48,834 --> 00:06:50,067
Stop your crying!
185
00:06:50,167 --> 00:06:51,601
You better
quit crying!
186
00:06:51,701 --> 00:06:53,100
Get that big
ass down!
187
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:54,400
Get it down!
188
00:06:54,501 --> 00:06:56,267
Okay, look, we got an A.P.B.,
two male caucasians.
189
00:06:56,367 --> 00:06:58,734
We got khaki slacks,
we got button-down shirts,
190
00:06:58,834 --> 00:07:00,801
we got neckties,
blue and brown.
191
00:07:00,901 --> 00:07:03,167
You, big man, right here,
in the green.
192
00:07:03,267 --> 00:07:04,567
Reach...
Get your satchel.
193
00:07:04,667 --> 00:07:05,934
Take it off, sir.
194
00:07:06,033 --> 00:07:07,267
Slow!
195
00:07:07,367 --> 00:07:09,033
Don't move...
Get goin'... let go!
196
00:07:09,133 --> 00:07:11,033
Jones, check the bag.
197
00:07:11,133 --> 00:07:12,667
Stay down.
Stop crying.
198
00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:14,434
Shut up.
199
00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:16,334
They're
Jehovah's witnesses.
200
00:07:16,434 --> 00:07:17,133
What?
201
00:07:17,234 --> 00:07:18,968
They're
Jehovah's witnesses.
202
00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:20,934
( Sobbing )
203
00:07:21,033 --> 00:07:22,334
Sorry about that,
fellas.
204
00:07:22,434 --> 00:07:23,501
Wrong men.
205
00:07:23,601 --> 00:07:24,934
Sorry about that,
have a good day.
206
00:07:29,434 --> 00:07:31,033
A.P.B., my ass.
207
00:07:31,133 --> 00:07:32,701
God, I hate
religious people.
208
00:07:32,801 --> 00:07:34,634
( Beep )
The guy was crying.
209
00:07:34,734 --> 00:07:35,767
( Honking horn )
210
00:07:35,868 --> 00:07:37,334
See you,
have a good day!
211
00:07:37,434 --> 00:07:39,868
( Wailing siren )
212
00:07:42,667 --> 00:07:45,267
( Junior ) Now, the
mayor's all raising hell
213
00:07:45,367 --> 00:07:46,501
because, uh,
he wants us to crack down
214
00:07:46,601 --> 00:07:49,467
on illegal fireworks,
'cause his son
215
00:07:49,567 --> 00:07:51,567
blew his thumb off
with an m-80.
216
00:07:51,667 --> 00:07:53,534
But, uh,
you know, truth is,
217
00:07:53,634 --> 00:07:55,367
I was at that party
with this boy,
218
00:07:55,467 --> 00:07:57,534
and, uh, that is not
how he lost his thumb.
219
00:07:57,634 --> 00:07:59,901
He was, uh...
Very drunk.
220
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,701
I was very drunk myself.
221
00:08:01,801 --> 00:08:04,234
Somebody bet
him $25
222
00:08:04,334 --> 00:08:06,801
that he could not
snatch a tennis ball
223
00:08:06,901 --> 00:08:08,534
out from underneath
a lawnmower
224
00:08:08,634 --> 00:08:10,067
while it was going.
225
00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:11,567
And he did it twice,
but they kept...
226
00:08:11,667 --> 00:08:13,167
"Double or nothing,
double or nothing,
227
00:08:13,267 --> 00:08:14,567
ray, double or nothing."
228
00:08:14,667 --> 00:08:16,133
And the third time...
Whack.
229
00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:18,234
What is that?
230
00:08:18,334 --> 00:08:20,000
What is what?
What are you wearing?
231
00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:21,534
Oh, my gosh.
232
00:08:21,634 --> 00:08:23,901
Pull up your
bloomers, please!
233
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,868
These aren't bloomers,
they're underpants...
234
00:08:25,968 --> 00:08:28,334
Okay, well, your...
They should be under.
235
00:08:28,434 --> 00:08:30,200
Look, okay.
236
00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:32,300
I picked can you...
It out...
237
00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:34,767
It looked better in
the catalog than it does on.
238
00:08:34,868 --> 00:08:36,133
Hey, big boy.
239
00:08:36,234 --> 00:08:37,467
Hey, hey,
there, hey.
240
00:08:37,567 --> 00:08:38,501
Stick out your boob...
241
00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:39,534
Look what I'm
doing with my leg.
242
00:08:39,634 --> 00:08:40,667
I see what
you're doing.
243
00:08:40,767 --> 00:08:43,834
Just do a little hip action,
a little hip action.
244
00:08:43,934 --> 00:08:45,834
See that, see?
245
00:08:45,934 --> 00:08:47,701
Oh, see,
it's working.
246
00:08:47,801 --> 00:08:49,000
Hey, big boy.
Hey.
247
00:08:49,100 --> 00:08:50,334
Good afternoon, ladies.
248
00:08:50,434 --> 00:08:51,868
You want to go around,
maybe a B.J. or two?
249
00:08:51,968 --> 00:08:52,868
I'm on my
dinner break.
250
00:08:52,968 --> 00:08:55,534
No, go ahead...
No, go ahead.
251
00:08:55,634 --> 00:08:57,167
Okay.
252
00:08:57,267 --> 00:08:58,234
Have fun.
253
00:08:58,334 --> 00:09:00,501
All right, thanks.
254
00:09:00,601 --> 00:09:03,400
I'll be... I'll see
ya in a few, okay.
255
00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:05,601
Hey, how
you doing?
256
00:09:05,701 --> 00:09:07,267
Have fun, you two.
257
00:09:07,367 --> 00:09:08,501
Bye, Trudy...
258
00:09:08,601 --> 00:09:09,534
Wear your
seat belt.
259
00:09:09,634 --> 00:09:11,234
I mean, bunny.
260
00:09:11,334 --> 00:09:14,467
Hey, I don't
need your sass.
261
00:09:14,567 --> 00:09:16,767
I'll just be here!
262
00:09:16,868 --> 00:09:18,200
Or not!
263
00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:20,734
I might be giving
a B.J. somewhere!
264
00:09:20,834 --> 00:09:22,167
1300 hours.
265
00:09:22,267 --> 00:09:24,734
This is lieutenant
James dangle on patrol.
266
00:09:24,834 --> 00:09:28,667
I am on the lookout
for illegal fireworks.
267
00:09:31,834 --> 00:09:34,234
This guy's flagging
me down over here.
268
00:09:34,334 --> 00:09:36,467
What's going
on here?
269
00:09:36,567 --> 00:09:37,834
Hi.
Hi.
270
00:09:37,934 --> 00:09:39,200
How you doing
today ?I'm fine.
271
00:09:39,300 --> 00:09:40,801
Uh, I'm sorry...
272
00:09:40,901 --> 00:09:42,067
Are you having
some trouble?
273
00:09:42,167 --> 00:09:43,234
Yes.
274
00:09:43,334 --> 00:09:45,968
I-I... my dog...
I lost my dog two days ago.
275
00:09:46,067 --> 00:09:47,267
Oh, you got a lost
dog there.
276
00:09:47,367 --> 00:09:48,834
Oh, jeez.
277
00:09:48,934 --> 00:09:50,167
Oh, man,
he's really cute.
278
00:09:50,267 --> 00:09:52,501
He's such a cutie pie.
279
00:09:52,601 --> 00:09:54,601
What is... what kind
of dog is that?
280
00:09:54,701 --> 00:09:56,033
Well, it's a mix breed.
281
00:09:56,133 --> 00:09:57,634
He won,
actually, first prize
282
00:09:57,734 --> 00:09:58,801
at "nuts for mutts"
this year...
283
00:09:58,901 --> 00:09:59,801
Did he really?
284
00:09:59,901 --> 00:10:01,367
"Nuts for mutts,"
isn't that wonderful?
285
00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:03,868
It's half pekingese
and half dachshund.
286
00:10:03,968 --> 00:10:05,033
I want to
eat him up.
287
00:10:05,133 --> 00:10:07,067
Rebel ?!
288
00:10:07,167 --> 00:10:08,534
Rebel.
289
00:10:08,634 --> 00:10:09,801
That's a
wonderful name.
290
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:11,234
That's a wonderful
dog name.
291
00:10:11,334 --> 00:10:14,467
He's based on a...
I named him after the movie.
292
00:10:14,567 --> 00:10:17,300
"Rebel..."
293
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:20,534
"Serpico,"
'cause he's a rebel.
294
00:10:20,634 --> 00:10:22,734
I thought in "Serpico"
his name is Paco?
295
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:27,534
Um...
296
00:10:27,634 --> 00:10:28,701
Can I say something?
Sure.
297
00:10:28,801 --> 00:10:30,200
Sure.
Can I be Frank?
298
00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:31,133
Are you Frank?
299
00:10:31,234 --> 00:10:32,200
I never asked
your name.
300
00:10:32,300 --> 00:10:33,334
I'm sorry,
I am Frank.
301
00:10:33,434 --> 00:10:34,200
You are Frank.
302
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,467
Oh, my God,
that's so funny,
303
00:10:35,567 --> 00:10:36,901
because I'm Jim.
304
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,000
Oh... uh...
305
00:10:42,667 --> 00:10:44,400
Rebel ?!
Rebel ?!
306
00:10:44,501 --> 00:10:45,834
Rebel, rebel...
307
00:10:45,934 --> 00:10:47,667
Oh, that's a David Bowie song.
Wait, stop.
308
00:10:50,167 --> 00:10:51,267
No.
309
00:10:51,367 --> 00:10:52,434
No, those
are flowers.
310
00:10:52,534 --> 00:10:53,501
( Blaring car alarm )
311
00:10:53,601 --> 00:10:55,100
Excuse me!
312
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,567
Sir?
313
00:10:56,667 --> 00:10:58,367
What's
going on here?
314
00:10:58,467 --> 00:11:00,467
Hey!
Hey!
315
00:11:00,567 --> 00:11:03,267
Did you break
this window out?
316
00:11:03,367 --> 00:11:04,567
What?
317
00:11:04,667 --> 00:11:06,767
I'm gonna have to ask you
to put that brick down.
318
00:11:06,868 --> 00:11:09,000
Did you use that brick
to break out that window?
319
00:11:09,100 --> 00:11:10,567
Nope.
320
00:11:10,667 --> 00:11:12,567
I don't need a brick
if want to break a window.
321
00:11:12,667 --> 00:11:14,467
Now, did you
break the window?
322
00:11:14,567 --> 00:11:16,701
Have you been
sniffing gas?
323
00:11:19,767 --> 00:11:20,934
Okay!
324
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,501
You see that?
325
00:11:25,601 --> 00:11:27,667
Go run from the police
and knock your own self out.
326
00:11:27,767 --> 00:11:28,834
Right.
Idiot.
327
00:11:28,934 --> 00:11:29,901
Girl, wait
a minute.
328
00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,033
Wait, wait, wait.
329
00:11:31,133 --> 00:11:32,434
Help me get up
on this thing.
330
00:11:32,534 --> 00:11:34,234
This look dangerous.
331
00:11:34,334 --> 00:11:37,501
It's pretty steady...
There you go.
332
00:11:37,601 --> 00:11:39,367
Oh!
333
00:11:39,467 --> 00:11:41,334
Oh, whoa!
334
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:44,367
( Clattering )
335
00:11:45,934 --> 00:11:47,767
( Man ) Hello, hello,
hello, hello!
336
00:11:47,868 --> 00:11:50,701
All right, you are
obstructing justice, sir!
337
00:11:50,801 --> 00:11:51,701
Get back...
338
00:11:51,801 --> 00:11:54,000
That feels good,
that feels good!
339
00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:55,834
Whoa, whoa!
340
00:11:55,934 --> 00:11:58,234
( Hooting )
341
00:11:58,334 --> 00:12:00,133
You better hope
I don't catch you, boy!
342
00:12:00,234 --> 00:12:03,267
You better hope I don't
catch up with you!
343
00:12:03,367 --> 00:12:04,534
Don't touch!
344
00:12:04,634 --> 00:12:06,501
Don't you
get in that car!
345
00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:08,801
Do not think
about it!
346
00:12:08,901 --> 00:12:10,734
Hey, hey, hey!
347
00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:15,501
( Blaring sirens )
348
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:17,801
We are screwed.
We are screwed.
349
00:12:17,901 --> 00:12:19,601
We are screwed.
350
00:12:19,701 --> 00:12:22,200
We gonna say
he tried to rape us.
351
00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:23,501
We gonna lie.
352
00:12:23,601 --> 00:12:25,434
We gonna say
he tried to rape us.
353
00:12:25,534 --> 00:12:27,968
( Panting )
354
00:12:28,067 --> 00:12:29,334
He attacked us.
355
00:12:29,434 --> 00:12:31,934
He tried
to r...
356
00:12:32,033 --> 00:12:35,067
Hand over
the tape.
357
00:12:35,167 --> 00:12:36,901
Give us the tape.
358
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,934
Hand over the...
Give us that tape!
359
00:12:39,033 --> 00:12:40,667
I will cut you!
360
00:12:42,467 --> 00:12:43,567
Oop.
361
00:12:43,667 --> 00:12:45,367
♪ Pop goes the weasel
362
00:12:45,467 --> 00:12:47,133
this looks
like American cheese.
363
00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:49,801
What size shoe
do you wear there?
364
00:12:49,901 --> 00:12:53,067
I have a...
10½,
365
00:12:53,167 --> 00:12:55,667
but I'll tell ya,
I'm busting out of it.
366
00:12:55,767 --> 00:12:57,834
I'm busting out
of my sneakers.
367
00:12:57,934 --> 00:13:00,334
Open up
choo-choo train.
368
00:13:00,434 --> 00:13:02,100
( Imitating train )
369
00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:02,901
Whoo-whoo!
370
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,100
Whoo-whoo!
371
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,200
Watch me, I'll turn
on a real siren, watch.
372
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:09,467
Oh, no, that's a light.
373
00:13:09,567 --> 00:13:11,901
So, you don't think
it's too big, right?
374
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:16,901
I don't... I...
375
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,167
The nose?
No.
376
00:13:18,267 --> 00:13:20,367
No, no,
it's very, uh...
377
00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:24,434
Uh... Roman.
378
00:13:24,534 --> 00:13:26,868
♪ When in Rome
379
00:13:26,968 --> 00:13:29,133
♪ when in Rome
380
00:13:29,234 --> 00:13:31,234
"when in Rome"...
Is that a song?
381
00:13:31,334 --> 00:13:32,968
I'm just flat-out
drunk, I think.
382
00:13:38,334 --> 00:13:40,133
Sir?
Hey, peek-a-boo.
383
00:13:40,234 --> 00:13:41,434
Hi.
384
00:13:41,534 --> 00:13:43,000
What are you doing
playing hide-and-seek tonight?
385
00:13:43,100 --> 00:13:45,868
Why are you hiding behind
a gigantic spool, sir?
386
00:13:45,968 --> 00:13:47,334
I'm good, I'm good.
387
00:13:47,434 --> 00:13:48,234
You're good?
388
00:13:48,334 --> 00:13:50,167
Holy [Bleep]!
Holy mother of God!
389
00:13:50,267 --> 00:13:51,534
Oh, my God!
390
00:13:51,634 --> 00:13:52,868
Well, well.
391
00:13:52,968 --> 00:13:54,501
Whoa... hey,
ho, ho, ho...
392
00:13:54,601 --> 00:13:56,501
Hey, Peter Pan,
take it easy!
393
00:13:56,601 --> 00:13:57,667
Whoa, whoa!
394
00:13:57,767 --> 00:13:58,901
Get him, Jones!
395
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,334
Sir, slow down.
396
00:14:00,434 --> 00:14:02,634
We're gonna need backup,
we're gonna need backup.
397
00:14:02,734 --> 00:14:05,734
We got a naked white man,
uh, running...
398
00:14:05,834 --> 00:14:07,567
Hey, don't do that!
399
00:14:07,667 --> 00:14:08,601
He just
flipped us off!
400
00:14:08,701 --> 00:14:10,133
Son of a bitch!
401
00:14:10,234 --> 00:14:12,100
( Muttering )
402
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:13,701
I don't even
want to touch him.
403
00:14:13,801 --> 00:14:15,434
Hey, hey,
ho, ho, ho...
404
00:14:15,534 --> 00:14:16,634
Slow down, sir!
405
00:14:16,734 --> 00:14:19,067
Oh, son of a bitch!
406
00:14:19,167 --> 00:14:20,534
Son of a bitch!
407
00:14:20,634 --> 00:14:22,801
Whee-oo!
408
00:14:22,901 --> 00:14:23,901
Goddamn it.
409
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:24,901
I can't
believe that.
410
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,500
I thought you had
speed, brother.
411
00:14:28,968 --> 00:14:29,868
( Wiegel )
I enjoy fireworks.
412
00:14:29,968 --> 00:14:32,067
I actually have...
413
00:14:32,167 --> 00:14:35,067
If I have an addiction
to anything,
414
00:14:35,167 --> 00:14:37,133
it's sparklers.
415
00:14:37,234 --> 00:14:41,400
Um... you know,
round come 4th of July,
416
00:14:41,501 --> 00:14:44,400
uh, you're gonna find me,
you know,
417
00:14:44,501 --> 00:14:46,400
taking sparkler off a perp,
418
00:14:46,501 --> 00:14:47,701
giving him a ticket,
419
00:14:47,801 --> 00:14:49,534
and then I'm gonna go in my
backyard with my cats
420
00:14:49,634 --> 00:14:51,834
and we're
gonna put on a show.
421
00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:53,834
I don't want that one.
422
00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:55,267
Did you just throw that
out the window?
423
00:14:57,534 --> 00:14:59,133
I don't want it.
424
00:14:59,234 --> 00:15:00,334
Well, pick it up.
425
00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:01,767
No.
426
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:03,934
Why, is someone
gonna arrest me?
427
00:15:08,734 --> 00:15:10,968
Nope, I already
got you.
428
00:15:11,067 --> 00:15:12,434
Don't even try it.
429
00:15:12,534 --> 00:15:13,801
Put it back.
430
00:15:13,901 --> 00:15:14,634
All right.
431
00:15:14,734 --> 00:15:15,667
Leave it alone,
okay?
432
00:15:15,767 --> 00:15:17,267
All right, all right.
433
00:15:17,367 --> 00:15:19,767
Slow... and...
434
00:15:19,868 --> 00:15:22,934
( Laughing )
435
00:15:23,033 --> 00:15:24,167
Yeah.
436
00:15:24,267 --> 00:15:28,367
Well, we got a 10-19
call for trespassing.
437
00:15:28,467 --> 00:15:30,834
There is no parking,
there's no camping,
438
00:15:30,934 --> 00:15:35,167
there's no, uh, staying
for long periods of time.
439
00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:37,901
We got a call about...
Well, there it is.
440
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:40,000
We're gonna
have to figure out
441
00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:41,200
what the hell he's
doing out here.
442
00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:43,968
Usually, they're
drinkin' and reading porno.
443
00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:45,701
Oh, where's all
your customers, sir?
444
00:15:45,801 --> 00:15:47,200
I don't, uh...
445
00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:48,968
I don't know how you're
doing any business out here.
446
00:15:49,067 --> 00:15:51,133
You serving
gophers and, uh...
447
00:15:51,234 --> 00:15:56,834
( Speaking foreign language )
448
00:15:56,934 --> 00:15:58,000
No.
449
00:15:58,100 --> 00:15:59,200
No, no, no.
450
00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:00,801
Uh... wow.
451
00:16:00,901 --> 00:16:02,901
We got a funny-looking
van here, don't we?
452
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:04,234
Golly, look at that.
453
00:16:04,334 --> 00:16:06,901
You got all these "no smoking"
signs on your ice cream truck.
454
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,067
You got, uh,
"no smoking" here,
455
00:16:09,167 --> 00:16:10,667
and "no smoking"
over here,
456
00:16:10,767 --> 00:16:14,667
and "no...
Whoa, we got a runner!
457
00:16:14,767 --> 00:16:16,667
There we go,
there we go.
458
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,300
( Shouting in foreign
language )
459
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,601
Whoa, ho, ho,
calm down, calm down.
460
00:16:21,701 --> 00:16:23,734
You gotta learn
not to run, sir.
461
00:16:23,834 --> 00:16:25,934
Watch your head.
Come on, sir.
462
00:16:26,033 --> 00:16:27,467
Get in!
463
00:16:27,567 --> 00:16:28,801
Get in, sir,
don't fight him.
464
00:16:28,901 --> 00:16:30,100
Oh ! He's kicking me!
465
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:31,501
He's kicking me!
466
00:16:31,601 --> 00:16:34,634
Sir, I will not hesitate
to beat your ass
467
00:16:34,734 --> 00:16:36,067
with your own shoe!
468
00:16:36,167 --> 00:16:37,567
Settle down!
469
00:16:37,667 --> 00:16:39,367
What you
got in here?
470
00:16:39,467 --> 00:16:41,033
Oh!
471
00:16:41,133 --> 00:16:43,834
Kung pao, bok choy,
Jones!
472
00:16:43,934 --> 00:16:47,100
We just hit
the China-man gold mine.
473
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:48,834
Happy new year.
474
00:16:48,934 --> 00:16:50,400
Boy, this would
make a party fun.
475
00:16:50,501 --> 00:16:52,567
That'll blow your balls
to hell right there,
476
00:16:52,667 --> 00:16:53,868
if you're not careful.
477
00:16:53,968 --> 00:16:55,501
We got a lot
of fireworks...
478
00:16:55,601 --> 00:16:58,334
Illegal fireworks here,
up in wausau canyon,
479
00:16:58,434 --> 00:16:59,567
so we're
gonna need backup.
480
00:16:59,667 --> 00:17:00,801
It's Jones and Garcia here.
481
00:17:00,901 --> 00:17:02,901
How old do I look?
How old do I look?
482
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,601
How old do I look?
483
00:17:09,734 --> 00:17:10,901
I don't know.
484
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:13,000
I don't want... if I go...
If I go too high...
485
00:17:13,100 --> 00:17:14,767
You go low, you're gonna
offend me either way.
486
00:17:14,868 --> 00:17:15,934
I offend you
if I go too low?
487
00:17:16,033 --> 00:17:18,000
Uh, damned if you do,
damned if you don't,
488
00:17:18,100 --> 00:17:19,267
you know?
489
00:17:22,033 --> 00:17:23,300
You're a handsome...
490
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:24,300
You want to
see how old I am?
491
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:25,634
I would love to see how
old you are.
492
00:17:25,734 --> 00:17:27,000
Oh, sure, you can take
my whole wallet.
493
00:17:27,100 --> 00:17:28,367
Here, look,
it's right there.
494
00:17:28,467 --> 00:17:29,534
Just take a look,
it's right there.
495
00:17:29,634 --> 00:17:31,901
See right there
how old I am.
496
00:17:32,033 --> 00:17:35,734
( Imitating fanfare )
497
00:17:35,834 --> 00:17:37,634
And the winner
is you.
498
00:17:37,734 --> 00:17:39,467
Lucky 41.
499
00:17:39,567 --> 00:17:40,667
You got a lot of
stuff on that belt.
500
00:17:40,767 --> 00:17:43,167
You got, uh... you don't
just have the wallet.
501
00:17:43,267 --> 00:17:44,167
No, I got that...
502
00:17:44,267 --> 00:17:46,000
You have a...
What is that?
503
00:17:46,100 --> 00:17:46,934
Is that a gun?
504
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:48,033
Is there
a name for that?
505
00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:49,734
Yeah, it's a glock.
506
00:17:49,834 --> 00:17:51,968
Oh, do you carry
the... you carry mace?
507
00:17:52,067 --> 00:17:53,334
Of course I carry
mace, I carry everything.
508
00:17:53,434 --> 00:17:54,601
I carry gun clips,
I carry mace.
509
00:17:54,701 --> 00:17:55,801
Wow.
510
00:17:55,901 --> 00:17:57,634
This can knock
somebody out.
511
00:17:57,734 --> 00:17:59,234
This can put
somebody down.
512
00:17:59,334 --> 00:18:01,300
That's the best thing
we probably carry.
513
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:03,334
Yeah, what do you do,
just press it like that?
514
00:18:03,434 --> 00:18:04,200
Yeah, exactly...
515
00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:05,367
You just hold it up
and you go...
516
00:18:05,467 --> 00:18:11,067
( Screaming
and crying )
517
00:18:13,267 --> 00:18:15,567
Oh, my ( Beep ) Wallet.
518
00:18:19,834 --> 00:18:23,968
( Whining )
519
00:18:24,067 --> 00:18:27,334
Ow... oh, ow, ow.
520
00:18:27,434 --> 00:18:29,200
Hey, hey!
Ow, ow!
521
00:18:29,300 --> 00:18:31,567
( Sobbing )
522
00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:37,367
Yeah, man.
523
00:18:37,467 --> 00:18:38,767
Yeah, I do feel
good about this.
524
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,000
This is great.
525
00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:42,367
You know, the streets
of Reno are a lot safer
526
00:18:42,467 --> 00:18:44,000
because of what we did today.
527
00:18:44,100 --> 00:18:45,634
Because of what
our accomplishment
528
00:18:45,734 --> 00:18:48,067
of what we did in Reno,
we made the streets
529
00:18:48,167 --> 00:18:50,067
that much better for it.
530
00:18:50,167 --> 00:18:53,033
( Exploding )
531
00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:54,934
This ( Bleep )
Ain't funny, man!
532
00:18:55,033 --> 00:18:56,400
Oh, you want to go?
You want to go?
533
00:18:56,501 --> 00:18:57,968
Get me a lighter,
give me a lighter.
534
00:18:58,067 --> 00:18:59,501
Oh, you want to go
with jonesy, huh?
535
00:18:59,601 --> 00:19:00,968
You want to go
a round with jonesy?
536
00:19:01,067 --> 00:19:02,100
Let's go!
537
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,133
Let's go mother...( Beep )
Let's go!
538
00:19:04,234 --> 00:19:08,434
( Popping fireworks )
539
00:19:08,534 --> 00:19:09,467
( Whistling rockets )
540
00:19:09,567 --> 00:19:11,901
( Laughing )
541
00:19:17,667 --> 00:19:18,601
There you go.
542
00:19:18,701 --> 00:19:22,334
( Cheering )
543
00:19:23,734 --> 00:19:25,200
Oh, man, this is
good times.
544
00:19:25,300 --> 00:19:29,033
( All shouting at once )
545
00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:30,434
Oh ( Beep )
546
00:19:30,534 --> 00:19:32,033
I hit the truck!
I hit the truck!
547
00:19:32,133 --> 00:19:33,968
I hit the truck!
Go, go, go!
548
00:19:34,067 --> 00:19:36,200
I hit it, I hit it,
get down, get down!
549
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,300
What'd you hit?
550
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:38,634
I hit the truck
with a bottle rocket.
551
00:19:38,734 --> 00:19:41,234
Holy cow.
Oh, please.
552
00:19:41,334 --> 00:19:44,901
( Shouting )
553
00:19:45,033 --> 00:19:49,968
( Whistling and popping )
554
00:19:53,033 --> 00:19:56,334
( All talking at once )
555
00:19:56,434 --> 00:19:57,501
Oh, my God!
556
00:19:57,601 --> 00:19:59,567
Oh, boy,
dangle.
557
00:19:59,667 --> 00:20:01,434
I'm out of here.
558
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,300
I don't know ya,
never did.
559
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:05,534
Oh, man.Wow.
560
00:20:05,634 --> 00:20:07,167
I think we
can save it
561
00:20:07,267 --> 00:20:08,634
( dangle )
No, I don't think so.
562
00:20:10,734 --> 00:20:13,267
Can we get the fire
department down here?
563
00:20:13,367 --> 00:20:14,834
( Screeching tires )
564
00:20:14,934 --> 00:20:16,667
( Crashing )
565
00:20:16,767 --> 00:20:17,801
What ?! What ?!
566
00:20:17,901 --> 00:20:19,300
What on earth?
567
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,634
Hey... you don't...
Hey, I don't need that.
568
00:20:21,734 --> 00:20:22,467
I don't
need that.
569
00:20:22,567 --> 00:20:23,501
Look... look, I...
570
00:20:23,601 --> 00:20:24,567
You don't know me,
all right?
571
00:20:24,667 --> 00:20:26,801
He's got an apparatus
strapped to his head!
572
00:20:26,901 --> 00:20:28,167
You don't know me!
573
00:20:28,267 --> 00:20:29,434
Look, there's
a chick here
574
00:20:29,534 --> 00:20:31,267
that's been
stealing all my clothes.
575
00:20:31,367 --> 00:20:33,100
This takes 30 seconds
to take off.
576
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:34,234
Do you know
what I'm saying?
577
00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,467
All I have to do is
just take it off.
578
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:36,534
Do you know what I mean?
579
00:20:36,634 --> 00:20:38,367
I just take this off,
it's just off,
580
00:20:38,467 --> 00:20:40,934
and then I'm
naked, you know?
581
00:20:41,033 --> 00:20:42,100
I'm just standing
there naked.
582
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,601
And then I got,
like, half a song left.
583
00:20:44,701 --> 00:20:45,767
I give up!
I'm sorry!
584
00:20:45,868 --> 00:20:47,000
I didn't mean to
break in.
585
00:20:47,100 --> 00:20:48,300
( Shooting )
586
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,367
Wiegel !Wiegel!
587
00:20:50,467 --> 00:20:53,934
I did it...
I did something!
588
00:20:54,033 --> 00:20:55,200
( Laughing )
589
00:20:55,300 --> 00:20:57,033
U.S.A.!
U.S.A.!
590
00:21:05,834 --> 00:21:07,300
You know, all it
is is stay away
591
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:08,767
from my ( Beep ) tamales.
592
00:21:08,868 --> 00:21:10,567
Watch the language!
593
00:21:10,667 --> 00:21:13,634
And second of all,
let's think of another word.
594
00:21:13,734 --> 00:21:15,400
Stay away from my...
595
00:21:15,501 --> 00:21:16,968
( Wiegel )
Popcorn.
596
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:18,267
No, we're not replacing
the tamales,
597
00:21:18,367 --> 00:21:19,667
we're replacing the f-word,
598
00:21:19,767 --> 00:21:21,501
because we
don't say the F-word
599
00:21:21,601 --> 00:21:23,634
when we're serving
and protecting.
600
00:21:23,734 --> 00:21:25,467
Okay.
We don't say the F-word.
601
00:21:25,567 --> 00:21:27,701
What about ( Beep )?
602
00:21:27,751 --> 00:21:32,301
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