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1
00:00:03,693 --> 00:00:06,343
- [TV blaring]
- [dog barks]
2
00:00:07,743 --> 00:00:08,993
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Easy, little man.
3
00:00:09,043 --> 00:00:10,243
Try and keep it in the bowl, okay?
4
00:00:10,293 --> 00:00:11,393
I can do it.
5
00:00:11,443 --> 00:00:13,293
How many pancakes do you want, Lindsay?
6
00:00:13,343 --> 00:00:14,943
Lindsay.
7
00:00:14,993 --> 00:00:16,293
Take those stupid things off.
8
00:00:16,343 --> 00:00:18,543
Why is Bandit on the countertop?
9
00:00:18,593 --> 00:00:20,193
Damn dog.
10
00:00:20,243 --> 00:00:21,843
Can you turn that down, Nana?
11
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Nana. Lindsay, check
12
00:00:23,393 --> 00:00:25,293
and see if Nana's still breathing.
13
00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:27,493
Can I have juice?
14
00:00:27,543 --> 00:00:29,343
I don't know who you are.
15
00:00:29,393 --> 00:00:30,693
Does anyone know who this is?
16
00:00:30,743 --> 00:00:32,093
That's Kevin.
17
00:00:32,143 --> 00:00:33,493
- How did he get here?
- I don't know.
18
00:00:33,543 --> 00:00:34,893
Ooh! Mike, what are you doing?
19
00:00:34,943 --> 00:00:36,193
What did I tell you? Don't touch the stove.
20
00:00:36,243 --> 00:00:37,693
You're going to get burnt.
21
00:00:37,743 --> 00:00:38,793
- [giggling]
- Sit down.
22
00:00:38,843 --> 00:00:40,493
All right. Where are your shoes?
23
00:00:40,543 --> 00:00:41,943
You guys cannot be late this morning.
24
00:00:41,993 --> 00:00:43,393
Kyle's mom is driving you to camp.
25
00:00:43,443 --> 00:00:45,093
- Camp sucks.
- Easy with the attitude.
26
00:00:45,143 --> 00:00:47,193
Mom will pick you up this afternoon.
27
00:00:49,393 --> 00:00:50,443
What's for lunch?
28
00:00:50,493 --> 00:00:51,893
Uh...
29
00:00:51,943 --> 00:00:53,943
Okay, good news, everyone.
30
00:00:53,993 --> 00:00:55,143
It's Pop Tart Tuesday.
31
00:00:55,193 --> 00:00:57,043
Everybody gets Pop Tarts for lunch today.
32
00:00:57,093 --> 00:00:57,943
Yay!
33
00:00:57,993 --> 00:00:59,493
I hate Pop Tarts.
34
00:00:59,543 --> 00:01:00,543
You're getting Pop Tarts.
35
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:01,743
Kevin: Can I have juice?
36
00:01:01,793 --> 00:01:03,143
Here. Here's Pop Tarts.
37
00:01:03,193 --> 00:01:04,993
Okay, that's it. We got everything?
38
00:01:05,043 --> 00:01:06,643
It's breakfast, it's lunch. We're good.
39
00:01:06,693 --> 00:01:07,993
Have a great day.
40
00:01:08,043 --> 00:01:09,793
Sorry about the mess, Nana. I love you.
41
00:01:16,643 --> 00:01:19,193
Grab your coat, honey, grab your hat
42
00:01:19,243 --> 00:01:22,443
This train is leavin',
and it ain't comin' back
43
00:01:22,493 --> 00:01:25,443
Don't need a ticket, can't you understand?
44
00:01:25,493 --> 00:01:28,743
You're on your way to the Promised Land
45
00:01:28,793 --> 00:01:30,243
Take me
46
00:01:30,293 --> 00:01:33,543
Take me back to paradise
47
00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:34,943
Paradise
48
00:01:34,993 --> 00:01:36,793
-
Oh, yeah
-
Ooh
49
00:01:36,843 --> 00:01:39,643
Take me back to paradise
50
00:01:39,693 --> 00:01:41,343
Paradise
51
00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:42,993
Ooh
52
00:01:43,043 --> 00:01:45,943
Won't you take me back to paradise?
53
00:01:47,843 --> 00:01:49,243
What are you doing?
54
00:01:50,343 --> 00:01:51,643
[sigh]
55
00:01:51,693 --> 00:01:53,693
I was having the most wonderful dream.
56
00:01:53,743 --> 00:01:55,343
I was hiking in the Black Forest
57
00:01:55,393 --> 00:01:56,593
with Andrea Jaeger
58
00:01:56,643 --> 00:01:58,043
when we happened upon a wood nymph.
59
00:01:58,093 --> 00:01:59,293
I meant on the floor.
60
00:02:00,393 --> 00:02:01,643
My wife kicked me out.
61
00:02:01,693 --> 00:02:04,493
Oh, wow. Uh, I'm sorry.
62
00:02:04,543 --> 00:02:05,943
You needn't be. Mm.
63
00:02:05,993 --> 00:02:07,243
She does this periodically.
64
00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,393
In fact, I look forward to the time alone.
65
00:02:09,443 --> 00:02:10,943
Got everything I need here:
66
00:02:10,993 --> 00:02:13,493
TV, salty snacks, unlimited towels.
67
00:02:13,543 --> 00:02:14,793
I'm laughing.
68
00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,043
Well, let me know
69
00:02:16,093 --> 00:02:17,193
if there's anything I can do.
70
00:02:17,243 --> 00:02:18,993
That's very sweet of you, David.
71
00:02:19,043 --> 00:02:21,193
Actually, since you asked...
72
00:02:22,993 --> 00:02:24,893
Here. No fabric softener, please.
73
00:02:24,943 --> 00:02:26,193
It gives me hives.
74
00:02:28,543 --> 00:02:30,043
Good morning.
75
00:02:31,993 --> 00:02:33,993
David
76
00:02:37,643 --> 00:02:39,043
Oh, she hates me.
77
00:02:39,093 --> 00:02:40,693
- Who?
- Our daughter.
78
00:02:40,743 --> 00:02:42,643
Eh. It's a phase.
79
00:02:42,693 --> 00:02:44,043
You always say that.
80
00:02:44,093 --> 00:02:45,293
Because I love you
81
00:02:45,343 --> 00:02:46,893
and I'm trying to spare your feelings.
82
00:02:46,943 --> 00:02:47,893
Thank you.
83
00:02:47,943 --> 00:02:49,293
If it's any consolation,
84
00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:51,093
she's not a big fan of mine, either.
85
00:02:51,143 --> 00:02:54,293
I know. It's not really... she never was.
86
00:02:54,343 --> 00:02:55,093
True.
87
00:02:55,143 --> 00:02:57,743
She and I used to be close.
88
00:02:57,793 --> 00:02:59,443
Closer.
89
00:03:01,043 --> 00:03:02,843
Maybe we've given her too much.
90
00:03:02,893 --> 00:03:04,143
We've made it too easy.
91
00:03:04,193 --> 00:03:05,943
Oh, please. She's always
been her own person.
92
00:03:05,993 --> 00:03:08,143
She is who she is.
93
00:03:08,193 --> 00:03:10,093
Don't you remember Day 1 in the hospital?
94
00:03:10,143 --> 00:03:11,843
Already they're calling her a diva.
95
00:03:11,893 --> 00:03:13,043
Of course I remember.
96
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,143
She woke up all the other babies.
97
00:03:15,193 --> 00:03:18,693
And she wasn't happy until
she had a room of her own.
98
00:03:18,743 --> 00:03:20,593
- [sigh]
- God.
99
00:03:20,643 --> 00:03:23,143
It all goes so fast.
100
00:03:23,193 --> 00:03:24,143
Mm-hmm.
101
00:03:24,193 --> 00:03:26,493
Maybe we should have a talk with her.
102
00:03:26,543 --> 00:03:28,493
Yeah. Maybe we should.
103
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,793
I got to get to my massage.
104
00:03:31,843 --> 00:03:33,393
I think I'm going to take a steam.
105
00:03:33,443 --> 00:03:35,343
Goodbye, darling. Have a nice day.
106
00:03:35,393 --> 00:03:36,343
You, too.
107
00:03:39,693 --> 00:03:41,143
[sigh]
108
00:03:41,193 --> 00:03:43,043
Hey, great job today.
109
00:03:43,093 --> 00:03:44,393
Your footwork has really improved.
110
00:03:44,443 --> 00:03:46,343
But my legs still feel like Jell-o.
111
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,343
Yeah, well, they won't
by the end of the summer.
112
00:03:48,393 --> 00:03:49,643
Did you hear that, sweetheart?
113
00:03:49,693 --> 00:03:50,943
Hear what, babe?
114
00:03:50,993 --> 00:03:52,393
David says if I keep up with the tennis,
115
00:03:52,443 --> 00:03:54,443
I can have sexy legs like his.
116
00:03:54,493 --> 00:03:57,443
Well, actually, I didn't use
the, you know, the word sexy.
117
00:03:57,493 --> 00:04:00,593
Don't be modest. You have very sexy legs.
118
00:04:00,643 --> 00:04:01,693
Doesn't he, sweetheart?
119
00:04:01,743 --> 00:04:04,043
Such strong thighs.
120
00:04:04,093 --> 00:04:05,293
Calves aren't huge,
121
00:04:05,343 --> 00:04:07,193
but they've got good definition.
122
00:04:07,243 --> 00:04:09,293
And a cute little tuchus.
123
00:04:09,343 --> 00:04:12,243
- You squat?
- Only to pick things up.
124
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:14,993
Ha ha ha ha! Good one. I'm stealing that.
125
00:04:15,043 --> 00:04:16,443
I'm stealing him.
126
00:04:16,493 --> 00:04:19,693
So, babe, you get a chance to ask him?
127
00:04:19,743 --> 00:04:21,093
Not yet.
128
00:04:21,993 --> 00:04:23,993
So, Dave...
129
00:04:24,793 --> 00:04:26,093
here's the thing.
130
00:04:26,143 --> 00:04:28,043
You seem like a smart kid.
131
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:30,043
Good head on your shoulders,
132
00:04:30,093 --> 00:04:32,743
hardworking, but not a stuffed shirt.
133
00:04:32,793 --> 00:04:33,943
Am I right?
134
00:04:33,993 --> 00:04:35,593
You keep an open mind?
135
00:04:35,643 --> 00:04:37,093
You like to have fun?
136
00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:39,143
You up for anything?
137
00:04:39,193 --> 00:04:41,143
- I... I guess.
- Good. We thought so,
138
00:04:41,193 --> 00:04:44,143
which is why Jean and
I wanted to talk to you
139
00:04:44,193 --> 00:04:47,643
about joining us in what you might call
140
00:04:47,693 --> 00:04:49,243
a little social experiment.
141
00:04:49,293 --> 00:04:50,593
- Oh, sugar.
- What's wrong?
142
00:04:50,643 --> 00:04:52,543
We're late for lunch with the Katzes.
143
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:53,643
That's today?
144
00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:55,193
We were supposed to meet
them ten minutes ago.
145
00:04:55,243 --> 00:04:57,393
Shit. You going to be around after lunch?
146
00:04:57,443 --> 00:04:59,193
- I think so.
- Great.
147
00:04:59,243 --> 00:05:01,043
We'll talk more then.
148
00:05:04,243 --> 00:05:05,993
I've got a good little tuchus.
149
00:05:06,043 --> 00:05:07,593
You really...
150
00:05:10,343 --> 00:05:11,893
Hey, do you know the Blums?
151
00:05:11,943 --> 00:05:13,693
Dale and Jean? Yes, of course.
152
00:05:13,743 --> 00:05:15,143
He's my dentist.
153
00:05:15,193 --> 00:05:17,043
It's really weird. After a lesson today,
154
00:05:17,093 --> 00:05:18,393
she grabbed my ass right in front of him.
155
00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:20,243
- Oh, my.
- He didn't seem to mind.
156
00:05:20,293 --> 00:05:22,143
- He actually seemed cool with it.
- Mm-hmm.
157
00:05:22,193 --> 00:05:23,643
Sounds crazy, but I got the feeling
158
00:05:23,693 --> 00:05:25,643
they were hitting on me, like as a couple.
159
00:05:25,693 --> 00:05:27,693
They were.
160
00:05:27,743 --> 00:05:29,043
They're swingers.
161
00:05:29,093 --> 00:05:30,393
Seriously?
162
00:05:30,443 --> 00:05:31,743
Ask anyone.
163
00:05:33,843 --> 00:05:36,393
- Oh, God.
- What's wrong?
164
00:05:36,443 --> 00:05:38,093
That must be what they
want to talk to me about.
165
00:05:38,143 --> 00:05:39,593
I think they want me to swing.
166
00:05:39,643 --> 00:05:41,793
Ha ha ha ha!
167
00:05:41,843 --> 00:05:43,093
Why you?
168
00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:44,143
She likes my legs.
169
00:05:44,193 --> 00:05:45,493
Those are not legs.
170
00:05:45,543 --> 00:05:47,893
Those are broom handles
wrapped in chicken skins
171
00:05:47,943 --> 00:05:49,443
dropped on the floor of a barber shop.
172
00:05:49,493 --> 00:05:50,843
Now, these...
173
00:05:50,893 --> 00:05:52,243
these are legs:
174
00:05:52,293 --> 00:05:54,593
strong like a stallion's,
175
00:05:54,643 --> 00:05:55,743
iron wrought,
176
00:05:55,793 --> 00:05:57,043
every sliver of muscle
177
00:05:57,093 --> 00:05:58,943
intended by Allah Himself,
178
00:05:58,993 --> 00:06:01,893
every quiver, every motion deliberate.
179
00:06:01,943 --> 00:06:03,443
What do I do, Nash?
180
00:06:03,493 --> 00:06:05,193
There's only one thing to be done, boychik:
181
00:06:05,243 --> 00:06:07,393
close your eyes and pucker up.
182
00:06:07,443 --> 00:06:08,593
Ah, no way.
183
00:06:08,643 --> 00:06:11,593
That's swinging, baby.
184
00:06:14,943 --> 00:06:16,043
Herb.
185
00:06:16,093 --> 00:06:18,393
Mr. President.
186
00:06:18,443 --> 00:06:19,693
Uhh.
187
00:06:19,743 --> 00:06:22,093
Aye yai yai yai yai yai yai.
188
00:06:22,143 --> 00:06:23,193
Oh, yeah?
189
00:06:23,243 --> 00:06:26,143
Oh, my neck is all stiff.
190
00:06:26,193 --> 00:06:27,943
Oh. You ever get that?
191
00:06:27,993 --> 00:06:30,843
I haven't turned to the left since 1978.
192
00:06:30,893 --> 00:06:31,843
[chuckles]
193
00:06:31,893 --> 00:06:33,093
You sleeping?
194
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:34,893
Oh. What, are you kidding?
195
00:06:34,943 --> 00:06:36,793
With all the shit on my mind?
196
00:06:36,843 --> 00:06:37,943
Huh.
197
00:06:37,993 --> 00:06:39,793
Even if I manage to fall asleep,
198
00:06:39,843 --> 00:06:42,693
doesn't help because I'm up
twice a night to pee anyway.
199
00:06:42,743 --> 00:06:43,843
- Twice a night?
- Yeah.
200
00:06:43,893 --> 00:06:45,643
How about nine times a night?
201
00:06:45,693 --> 00:06:47,393
Every 45 minutes.
202
00:06:47,443 --> 00:06:49,743
And two of the nine? Mostly blood.
203
00:06:51,943 --> 00:06:53,443
How are your balls?
204
00:06:54,893 --> 00:06:55,943
Good.
205
00:06:55,993 --> 00:06:57,493
Just wait till you turn 70
206
00:06:57,543 --> 00:07:00,743
and they start to droop
like the ears on a beagle.
207
00:07:00,793 --> 00:07:02,543
You eating?
208
00:07:02,593 --> 00:07:04,093
Nah. Not really.
209
00:07:04,143 --> 00:07:05,493
Yeah?
210
00:07:05,543 --> 00:07:06,793
How about you?
211
00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:08,343
Pudding and soup.
212
00:07:08,393 --> 00:07:10,893
I haven't had a satisfying crap
213
00:07:10,943 --> 00:07:13,293
since Thanksgiving three years ago.
214
00:07:13,343 --> 00:07:15,393
And my knees fill up with fluid
215
00:07:15,443 --> 00:07:17,293
if I even think about salt.
216
00:07:17,343 --> 00:07:19,293
And yesterday I don't know what I did,
217
00:07:19,343 --> 00:07:21,743
but I fucked up something in my foot.
218
00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:25,693
All right. You win.
219
00:07:25,743 --> 00:07:27,443
You win, Herb.
220
00:07:28,993 --> 00:07:30,643
You win.
221
00:07:32,993 --> 00:07:34,793
Hey, handsome.
222
00:07:34,843 --> 00:07:35,943
Hey, there, champ.
223
00:07:35,993 --> 00:07:37,143
So, um,
224
00:07:37,193 --> 00:07:38,643
about that thing we were discussing...
225
00:07:38,693 --> 00:07:39,893
I can't.
226
00:07:39,943 --> 00:07:40,943
Can't what?
227
00:07:40,993 --> 00:07:43,143
Join you that way.
228
00:07:43,193 --> 00:07:44,443
No offense.
229
00:07:44,493 --> 00:07:46,793
D... did you think we wanted...
230
00:07:46,843 --> 00:07:48,193
With you?
231
00:07:50,843 --> 00:07:52,143
We wouldn't dream.
232
00:07:52,193 --> 00:07:54,743
We're not cradle robbers.
233
00:07:54,793 --> 00:07:56,593
I'm confused.
234
00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:58,893
David, sweetie, Dale
and I aren't interested
235
00:07:58,943 --> 00:08:00,293
in having sex with you.
236
00:08:00,343 --> 00:08:01,643
You're not?
237
00:08:03,043 --> 00:08:05,043
We want to have sex with each other.
238
00:08:05,093 --> 00:08:06,743
While you film it.
239
00:08:09,793 --> 00:08:12,593
This is legendary. How did this happen?
240
00:08:12,643 --> 00:08:14,743
Apparently they liked the video I shot
241
00:08:14,793 --> 00:08:16,243
of the Kornblatt wedding.
242
00:08:16,293 --> 00:08:18,043
Please tell me you said yes.
243
00:08:18,093 --> 00:08:20,443
I said I'd have to let them know.
244
00:08:21,643 --> 00:08:24,643
Are you nuts? This is a dream come true.
245
00:08:24,693 --> 00:08:25,893
Not my dream.
246
00:08:25,943 --> 00:08:27,293
Every dude's dream:
247
00:08:27,343 --> 00:08:29,693
getting paid to watch nude people screw
248
00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:30,943
3 feet from you.
249
00:08:30,993 --> 00:08:33,943
How are you not weeping with joy right now?
250
00:08:33,993 --> 00:08:35,743
I don't know. It just feels weird.
251
00:08:35,793 --> 00:08:40,693
That's just your bourgeois
Puritanical upbringing talking, man.
252
00:08:42,143 --> 00:08:43,993
You really think I should do this?
253
00:08:44,043 --> 00:08:46,243
Absolutely.
254
00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:47,943
Under one condition.
255
00:08:47,993 --> 00:08:49,243
What's that?
256
00:08:50,443 --> 00:08:51,793
Take me with you.
257
00:08:51,843 --> 00:08:53,393
No way.
258
00:08:53,443 --> 00:08:56,093
Dude, Mrs. Blum has
been my dental hygienist
259
00:08:56,143 --> 00:08:58,643
since I was, like, 12. All right?
260
00:08:58,693 --> 00:09:01,293
I've always fantasized about
what her boobs might look like,
261
00:09:01,343 --> 00:09:02,793
and this is an opportunity.
262
00:09:02,843 --> 00:09:05,243
Like, when... when else
would I get the opportunity?
263
00:09:05,293 --> 00:09:07,593
Yeah. Okay. Let's do it.
264
00:09:07,643 --> 00:09:08,893
- Really?
- Yeah.
265
00:09:08,943 --> 00:09:10,293
Oh, my God.
266
00:09:17,993 --> 00:09:19,643
- Hey.
- Hey.
267
00:09:19,693 --> 00:09:21,493
I just want to let you know
I don't need a ride home.
268
00:09:21,543 --> 00:09:22,893
My last two lessons canceled,
269
00:09:22,943 --> 00:09:24,243
so I figured I'd leave a little early.
270
00:09:24,293 --> 00:09:25,693
Oh. Lucky.
271
00:09:25,743 --> 00:09:28,293
So what are your plans tonight?
272
00:09:28,343 --> 00:09:30,143
Are we doing something or...
273
00:09:30,193 --> 00:09:32,093
Well, actually, I hope it's cool,
274
00:09:32,143 --> 00:09:33,693
but I made plans with Wheeler.
275
00:09:33,743 --> 00:09:36,543
I figured you'd be too tired to hang out.
276
00:09:36,593 --> 00:09:38,243
Okay.
277
00:09:38,293 --> 00:09:40,393
Uh, why? Did you want to? [Stammer]
278
00:09:40,443 --> 00:09:44,043
No. I... I... Uh, God, yes.
279
00:09:44,093 --> 00:09:46,943
I do. I'm just... I'm tired,
280
00:09:46,993 --> 00:09:49,243
so I'm probably just
going to go home and study.
281
00:09:49,293 --> 00:09:50,293
That's cool.
282
00:09:50,343 --> 00:09:51,443
[chuckle]
283
00:09:51,493 --> 00:09:53,243
I'll, uh, I'll call you later?
284
00:09:53,293 --> 00:09:54,643
You know what? I will, uh...
285
00:09:54,693 --> 00:09:56,043
I'll probably just see you tomorrow.
286
00:09:56,093 --> 00:09:59,193
So okay.
287
00:09:59,243 --> 00:10:00,443
- Bye.
- Bye.
288
00:10:40,093 --> 00:10:41,193
[chatter]
289
00:10:41,243 --> 00:10:44,393
Judy: Oh! Oh, hi!
290
00:10:44,443 --> 00:10:45,743
Everybody look. It's my David!
291
00:10:45,793 --> 00:10:46,993
- Hi, David.
- What's going on?
292
00:10:47,043 --> 00:10:48,543
Study group.
293
00:10:48,593 --> 00:10:50,243
- Nice meeting you all.
- No, no, no, sweetie.
294
00:10:50,293 --> 00:10:52,343
- Stay and celebrate with us.
- I can't. I have a thing.
295
00:10:52,393 --> 00:10:53,843
I only stopped by to grab my stuff. Bye.
296
00:10:53,893 --> 00:10:57,043
Look at him. My baby. He's so grown up.
297
00:10:58,893 --> 00:11:01,393
- Dad, what are you doing in here?
- Hiding.
298
00:11:01,443 --> 00:11:03,143
I don't know where your
mother finds these people.
299
00:11:03,193 --> 00:11:06,793
Honest to God, they're like
extras from a Fellini movie.
300
00:11:06,843 --> 00:11:09,493
Hey, what do you say we sneak
out of here, hit the Sizzler?
301
00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:11,743
I can't. I've got another video gig.
302
00:11:11,793 --> 00:11:13,193
Wedding?
303
00:11:13,243 --> 00:11:14,493
Private event.
304
00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:17,493
Oh. All right, yeah.
305
00:11:17,543 --> 00:11:19,193
- Take me with you.
- Huh?
306
00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:20,443
I'm kidding. I'm only kidding.
307
00:11:20,493 --> 00:11:21,493
I'm kidding. I'm not kidding.
308
00:11:21,543 --> 00:11:22,593
Get me out of here, David.
309
00:11:22,643 --> 00:11:23,743
I got to leave this house.
310
00:11:23,793 --> 00:11:25,393
Please, take me with you.
311
00:11:25,443 --> 00:11:26,993
Sorry, Dad. I got to run.
312
00:11:27,043 --> 00:11:28,593
Oh. Is it all right
313
00:11:28,643 --> 00:11:30,143
if I hang around in here until they leave?
314
00:11:30,193 --> 00:11:31,143
Yeah. Sure.
315
00:11:31,193 --> 00:11:32,993
Oh, David.
316
00:11:33,043 --> 00:11:34,443
It's nice you have a hobby.
317
00:11:34,493 --> 00:11:36,793
I can't wait to see the video.
318
00:11:36,843 --> 00:11:38,643
Yeah. Me, too.
319
00:11:46,343 --> 00:11:47,593
Let's go.
320
00:11:47,643 --> 00:11:49,193
I'm coming, I'm coming.
321
00:11:49,243 --> 00:11:50,493
Oh, God, oh, man.
322
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:51,993
I cannot believe this is happening.
323
00:11:52,043 --> 00:11:53,543
- Wheeler, chill.
- How can I chill?
324
00:11:53,593 --> 00:11:54,993
I'm about to see Mrs. Blum naked.
325
00:11:55,043 --> 00:11:57,143
I've been fantasizing about this for years.
326
00:11:57,193 --> 00:11:58,143
[ding dong]
327
00:12:04,093 --> 00:12:05,443
Hi, there, beautiful.
328
00:12:06,293 --> 00:12:07,393
Hi.
329
00:12:07,443 --> 00:12:08,843
Entrez.
330
00:12:08,893 --> 00:12:09,893
Oh.
331
00:12:14,243 --> 00:12:15,543
Hi, boys.
332
00:12:15,593 --> 00:12:16,993
Hey. This is my friend I mentioned
333
00:12:17,043 --> 00:12:18,143
that'll be helping me out.
334
00:12:18,193 --> 00:12:19,243
Dr. Blum.
335
00:12:19,293 --> 00:12:20,943
- Mrs. Blum.
- Hey, buddy.
336
00:12:20,993 --> 00:12:22,943
- Still flossing?
- Religiously.
337
00:12:22,993 --> 00:12:23,993
This is Mittens.
338
00:12:24,043 --> 00:12:25,993
I want to shake your hand. I'm Mittens.
339
00:12:26,043 --> 00:12:29,143
I'll, uh, I'll just wave.
I'm actually allergic.
340
00:12:29,193 --> 00:12:31,493
- Okay.
- [chuckle]
341
00:12:34,543 --> 00:12:36,743
Well, don't just stand
there. Come in. Get a beer.
342
00:12:36,793 --> 00:12:38,943
Are you hungry? I made a lasagna.
343
00:12:43,143 --> 00:12:45,243
Your place is nice.
344
00:12:45,293 --> 00:12:46,593
I really like it.
345
00:12:46,643 --> 00:12:49,093
Thanks. Yeah, it's a good space.
346
00:12:49,143 --> 00:12:50,893
Decent light.
347
00:12:50,943 --> 00:12:52,693
Good energy.
348
00:12:52,743 --> 00:12:53,643
Oh.
349
00:12:55,143 --> 00:12:57,093
I'm going to start with a wide angle lens,
350
00:12:57,143 --> 00:12:58,143
if that's okay with you.
351
00:12:58,193 --> 00:12:59,443
That's fine
352
00:12:59,493 --> 00:13:01,443
as long as it doesn't make me look fat.
353
00:13:01,493 --> 00:13:03,893
Not a lens in the world that could do that.
354
00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:06,193
Okay. [Chuckle]
355
00:13:06,243 --> 00:13:07,193
All right.
356
00:13:09,593 --> 00:13:10,843
David: What are you doing?
357
00:13:10,893 --> 00:13:14,193
So, Spielberg, we know you're the director,
358
00:13:14,243 --> 00:13:16,843
but we had a few ideas we wanted
to discuss, if that's okay.
359
00:13:16,893 --> 00:13:17,893
Sure.
360
00:13:17,943 --> 00:13:19,243
So we rehearsed a little scenario
361
00:13:19,293 --> 00:13:21,393
we thought would be fun
just to kick things off:
362
00:13:21,443 --> 00:13:25,043
some, uh, light kissing, a little petting.
363
00:13:25,093 --> 00:13:26,093
Maybe some oral.
364
00:13:26,143 --> 00:13:26,993
Mutual masturbation.
365
00:13:27,043 --> 00:13:28,993
Before getting to the main event.
366
00:13:30,543 --> 00:13:32,543
- Sounds good.
- Jean: Okay.
367
00:13:36,993 --> 00:13:37,943
You ready?
368
00:13:39,193 --> 00:13:40,243
Yeah.
369
00:13:44,293 --> 00:13:46,843
Is, uh, is something wrong?
370
00:13:46,893 --> 00:13:49,193
They're waiting for you
to say "action."
371
00:13:49,243 --> 00:13:50,693
Oh. Yeah. Sorry.
372
00:13:50,743 --> 00:13:53,043
And, uh, action.
373
00:13:55,993 --> 00:13:57,593
What the fuck?
374
00:13:57,643 --> 00:13:59,543
Knock knock knock.
375
00:14:00,943 --> 00:14:02,543
Oh, hello.
376
00:14:02,593 --> 00:14:05,643
Thanks for squeezing me
in in such short notice.
377
00:14:05,693 --> 00:14:08,543
Of course. Why don't you just lay, uh,
378
00:14:08,593 --> 00:14:12,243
face down here on this massage table?
379
00:14:12,293 --> 00:14:13,293
And let's get started.
380
00:14:13,343 --> 00:14:15,543
Oh, you're so tense.
381
00:14:15,593 --> 00:14:17,643
Well, I haven't been sleeping well
382
00:14:17,693 --> 00:14:20,543
since my wife left me for a periodontist.
383
00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:23,343
Oh, you must be so lonely.
384
00:14:23,393 --> 00:14:25,093
And horny.
385
00:14:25,143 --> 00:14:26,293
Ah-choo!
386
00:14:26,343 --> 00:14:27,393
Dale: How's the angle?
387
00:14:27,443 --> 00:14:28,993
So something like this.
388
00:14:29,043 --> 00:14:31,293
You know, you just want
to always pop that hip.
389
00:14:31,343 --> 00:14:32,393
That always works.
390
00:14:32,443 --> 00:14:33,593
Or you could, you know, just...
391
00:14:33,643 --> 00:14:34,643
I'll keep shooting
392
00:14:34,693 --> 00:14:35,793
if you want to walk upstairs,
393
00:14:35,843 --> 00:14:36,943
something like that.
394
00:14:36,993 --> 00:14:38,293
Just want to pop that hip.
395
00:14:38,343 --> 00:14:39,543
It always look so good.
396
00:14:39,593 --> 00:14:40,593
Oh. [Chuckle]
397
00:14:40,643 --> 00:14:41,693
Butterflies?
398
00:14:41,743 --> 00:14:44,143
Yeah. A few, actually.
399
00:14:44,193 --> 00:14:45,143
Hang on.
400
00:14:50,393 --> 00:14:51,993
Oh. Thank you.
401
00:14:52,043 --> 00:14:53,193
It should help.
402
00:14:59,143 --> 00:15:00,193
Ready?
403
00:15:00,243 --> 00:15:01,743
Uh, ready.
404
00:15:03,693 --> 00:15:06,593
This cassingle is so boss.
405
00:15:06,643 --> 00:15:09,393
-
[rock] - Let's do this.
406
00:15:09,443 --> 00:15:11,893
You put some magic in me
407
00:15:11,943 --> 00:15:13,293
- Action.
-
I feel the magic in me
408
00:15:13,343 --> 00:15:14,393
Ooh.
409
00:15:14,443 --> 00:15:15,293
Do what we do
410
00:15:15,343 --> 00:15:16,443
Okay. I'm coming in.
411
00:15:16,493 --> 00:15:17,743
- Okay.
- [meow]
412
00:15:17,793 --> 00:15:19,593
Okay. Keep going.
413
00:15:19,643 --> 00:15:21,143
Ah-choo!
414
00:15:21,193 --> 00:15:22,043
You all right?
415
00:15:22,093 --> 00:15:24,143
- Hello.
- You getting this?
416
00:15:24,193 --> 00:15:25,393
It's pretty great, guys. Keep going.
417
00:15:25,443 --> 00:15:26,593
- Hi, Mittens.
- [meow]
418
00:15:26,643 --> 00:15:28,993
Yeah, you feeling loose now?
419
00:15:29,043 --> 00:15:30,243
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.
420
00:15:30,293 --> 00:15:31,243
- Punish me.
- Ohh.
421
00:15:31,293 --> 00:15:33,293
- Action. Yeah.
- Yeah?
422
00:15:33,343 --> 00:15:35,393
- Yeah.
- Whoo.
423
00:15:35,443 --> 00:15:37,593
[sneezing]
424
00:15:37,643 --> 00:15:38,693
- Dude?
- Sound is good.
425
00:15:38,743 --> 00:15:40,043
- Ah-choo!
- Oh.
426
00:15:40,093 --> 00:15:41,193
[yowl, hiss]
427
00:15:41,243 --> 00:15:43,293
Fuck off, Mittens.
428
00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:45,293
- Honey.
- I'm just gonna move to here
429
00:15:45,343 --> 00:15:46,293
so that I can, uh...
430
00:15:48,143 --> 00:15:49,343
And action.
431
00:15:49,393 --> 00:15:50,643
Dale? Oh, great. Oh.
432
00:15:50,693 --> 00:15:52,443
That... It happens. Just...
433
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:53,743
Ow!
434
00:15:53,793 --> 00:15:54,993
[laughing]
435
00:15:55,043 --> 00:15:55,843
David: Okay.
436
00:15:55,893 --> 00:15:56,893
[car door closes]
437
00:15:56,943 --> 00:15:59,693
Jean, laughing: Oh, God!
438
00:16:01,993 --> 00:16:03,543
- Uhh.
- Oh, yeah.
439
00:16:03,593 --> 00:16:04,743
Jean: Oh, honey, grab me.
440
00:16:04,793 --> 00:16:06,193
- Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
- Come here.
441
00:16:06,243 --> 00:16:07,293
Hurry up.
442
00:16:07,343 --> 00:16:08,693
Right there. Yeah.
443
00:16:09,843 --> 00:16:11,293
- Shit.
- Are you getting this, guys?
444
00:16:13,393 --> 00:16:14,443
Whoo!
445
00:16:14,493 --> 00:16:15,493
You keep me all together
446
00:16:15,543 --> 00:16:16,793
Oh, my God.
447
00:16:16,843 --> 00:16:18,393
You tell me I could never...
448
00:16:18,443 --> 00:16:19,893
Now pout your lips.
449
00:16:19,943 --> 00:16:22,693
What, like this? Like...
450
00:16:23,693 --> 00:16:26,693
Beautiful. My lens is fogging up.
451
00:16:26,743 --> 00:16:28,893
Unbelievable.
452
00:16:28,943 --> 00:16:30,943
Loosen up a little bit.
453
00:16:30,993 --> 00:16:32,793
You're my kind of lover
454
00:16:32,843 --> 00:16:33,943
There you go.
455
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,343
All right, now give me the sexy.
456
00:16:38,093 --> 00:16:39,293
Is anybody home?
457
00:16:39,343 --> 00:16:41,693
- Guys!
- Dr. Blum! Mrs. Blum!
458
00:16:41,743 --> 00:16:42,993
- Is anyone home?
- Shh! Guys!
459
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:44,493
- Jean: Yes! Yes!
- This is the police.
460
00:16:44,543 --> 00:16:45,543
- Yes!
- Dale: Whoo-hoo-hoo!
461
00:16:45,593 --> 00:16:46,743
Yeah!
462
00:16:49,143 --> 00:16:49,943
Jean: Uh...
463
00:16:49,993 --> 00:16:52,543
Uh, is there a problem, officer?
464
00:16:52,593 --> 00:16:54,843
I got a noise complaint
from one of the neighbors.
465
00:16:54,893 --> 00:16:56,043
- Dale: Really?
- Yeah.
466
00:16:56,093 --> 00:16:57,243
I'm afraid I'm going to have to
467
00:16:57,293 --> 00:16:58,893
place you both under arrest.
468
00:16:58,943 --> 00:17:01,143
- Oh, shit.
- On what charge, Officer?
469
00:17:03,893 --> 00:17:05,243
Starting without me.
470
00:17:05,293 --> 00:17:07,343
- Ha ha ha ha!
- Ha ha ha!
471
00:17:07,393 --> 00:17:08,843
Get your camera, boys!
472
00:17:08,893 --> 00:17:09,993
Oh, yeah.
473
00:17:10,043 --> 00:17:11,543
I've been very naughty lately.
474
00:17:11,593 --> 00:17:12,943
- Yeah.
- I mean,
475
00:17:12,993 --> 00:17:14,293
you should probably take me to the station
476
00:17:14,343 --> 00:17:15,743
but we can work out some kind of a deal.
477
00:17:15,793 --> 00:17:17,243
Handcuffs.
478
00:17:17,293 --> 00:17:18,243
[shutter clicks]
479
00:17:18,293 --> 00:17:19,693
You can take that off.
480
00:17:19,743 --> 00:17:22,243
Hey-hey, don't be shy.
481
00:17:22,293 --> 00:17:24,093
I'm not.
482
00:17:24,143 --> 00:17:26,143
You're in the safest place in the world:
483
00:17:26,193 --> 00:17:28,343
my dojo.
484
00:17:33,793 --> 00:17:35,093
Oh, my God.
485
00:17:35,143 --> 00:17:37,893
I can't believe I'm going to do this.
486
00:17:44,993 --> 00:17:46,343
That was crazy.
487
00:17:46,393 --> 00:17:50,243
Yeah. I don't think I can ever have sex.
488
00:17:50,293 --> 00:17:52,393
Again.
489
00:17:52,443 --> 00:17:54,143
That's what I meant.
490
00:17:59,993 --> 00:18:03,043
Okay, well, good night.
491
00:18:05,493 --> 00:18:07,193
Sayonara.
492
00:18:10,793 --> 00:18:12,243
I can't.
493
00:18:27,543 --> 00:18:29,943
Baby, come to bed.
494
00:18:29,993 --> 00:18:31,293
I will. I will in a bit.
495
00:18:31,343 --> 00:18:32,493
I just... That's...
496
00:18:32,543 --> 00:18:34,193
I have some work I want to do.
497
00:18:34,243 --> 00:18:36,893
Sweetheart, she's 20 years old.
498
00:18:36,943 --> 00:18:38,693
You don't have to wait up for her anymore.
499
00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:41,093
Yeah. I will.
500
00:18:42,193 --> 00:18:43,293
All right.
501
00:19:01,943 --> 00:19:03,943
That was some crazy shit tonight.
502
00:19:05,393 --> 00:19:08,093
His back hair was like the rug in our den.
503
00:19:08,143 --> 00:19:09,843
What was with that cat?
504
00:19:09,893 --> 00:19:11,843
Wouldn't leave me alone.
505
00:19:11,893 --> 00:19:13,993
I think it was in love with you.
506
00:19:14,043 --> 00:19:15,843
I feel so violated.
507
00:19:15,893 --> 00:19:17,443
You should be. Have you seen your eyes?
508
00:19:17,493 --> 00:19:18,643
Can't see shit.
509
00:19:18,693 --> 00:19:20,143
[both laughing]
510
00:19:25,493 --> 00:19:28,043
How are things going with, uh, Misty?
511
00:19:28,093 --> 00:19:29,293
Really good, you know?
512
00:19:29,343 --> 00:19:31,693
We, uh, we hung out last weekend.
513
00:19:31,743 --> 00:19:33,243
It felt like we really connected.
514
00:19:34,743 --> 00:19:37,343
Without actually connecting.
515
00:19:39,243 --> 00:19:41,443
What's up with you and Getty's daughter?
516
00:19:41,493 --> 00:19:43,843
I, uh, nothing.
517
00:19:43,893 --> 00:19:44,843
We're just friends.
518
00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:46,543
Not even. I mean,
519
00:19:46,593 --> 00:19:49,093
I'm with Karen, so,
you know, it's whatever.
520
00:19:53,343 --> 00:19:56,443
You were like a real director tonight.
521
00:19:56,493 --> 00:19:59,093
Thanks.
522
00:19:59,143 --> 00:20:00,343
It was a little weird.
523
00:20:03,093 --> 00:20:04,843
I... I got to go.
524
00:20:05,893 --> 00:20:07,443
I should get going, too.
525
00:20:07,493 --> 00:20:09,043
Go ahead.
526
00:20:11,843 --> 00:20:12,893
Legendary.
527
00:20:12,943 --> 00:20:14,293
Legendary.
528
00:20:30,993 --> 00:20:34,093
Thinking of your private future
529
00:20:34,143 --> 00:20:35,493
You snatched at the trees
530
00:20:35,543 --> 00:20:38,443
And the starry dark green sleep
531
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:46,493
Thinking of your private future
532
00:20:46,543 --> 00:20:50,143
You think at the river and set it flowing
533
00:20:50,193 --> 00:20:53,043
A late fog's lifting, a fast wind's rising
534
00:20:53,093 --> 00:20:57,993
So you turn to reflect on
a brief night's session slip
535
00:21:02,693 --> 00:21:05,743
Thinking of your private future
536
00:21:05,793 --> 00:21:09,343
Cut by the scars of timeless coming back
537
00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:12,393
You realize the unreachable was nothing
538
00:21:12,443 --> 00:21:15,193
Cool winds wash down your hope
539
00:21:15,243 --> 00:21:16,993
And you slipped
540
00:21:18,743 --> 00:21:21,693
Cool winds wash down your hope
541
00:21:21,743 --> 00:21:23,043
And you slipped
542
00:21:27,593 --> 00:21:30,743
Start looking back in anger
543
00:21:30,793 --> 00:21:36,543
'cause you can't change the rules
544
00:21:41,751 --> 00:21:44,487
- Sync and corrected by TheDelta -
- www.addic7ed.com -
545
00:21:47,543 --> 00:21:50,593
Ahh
546
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,143
Ahh
547
00:21:53,893 --> 00:21:56,793
Ahh
548
00:21:56,843 --> 00:21:58,243
Ahh
549
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