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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,760
This programme contains
some strong language.
2
00:00:18,600 --> 00:00:21,120
Oh, great!
LAUGHTER
3
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Be careful!
4
00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:42,560
SCREAMS ECHO
5
00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:51,560
VOICES ECHO
6
00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:13,360
DOOR CREAKS
7
00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:02,760
< Come along!
8
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DOOR OPENS
9
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,080
Put them on my desk.
10
00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:17,800
The problem with Halloween
these days,
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is that people treat it
like Christmas.
12
00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:23,920
It's lost its true meaning.
For instance,
13
00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:26,880
do you know the real reason
that you're wearing a mask?
14
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:28,880
Because you said my breath smelt?
15
00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:31,640
Well, yes, it does.
16
00:02:31,640 --> 00:02:36,280
But the real reason
we don masks at Halloween is to ward off evil spirits.
17
00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:43,720
It's the one night of the year
when the divide between the living and the dead is at its thinnest.
18
00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:50,240
Wearing a mask disguises us as dark
spirits, and thus we avoid harm.
19
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,440
Where's your mask then?
20
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,960
Oh, I don't need one.
21
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:58,160
PHONE RINGS
22
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Yes?
23
00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:02,640
Good.
24
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,600
The trick-or-treaters
have arrived.
25
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Let's go and offer them a special
Halloween muffin, shall we?
26
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:15,160
It's important to keep up
these old traditions.
27
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,280
Oh! I nearly forgot to set the alarm.
28
00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:50,320
< Trick or treat!
29
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:54,560
< Oh, how marvellous!
Let's have a look at you!
30
00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:56,760
< I suppose you all want a treat?
31
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:07,240
N-No.
32
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,560
BOY: Sorry.
33
00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,480
ALARM RINGS
34
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,240
Right. So here we are...
35
00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:07,000
round the back of the building.
36
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:09,920
Er...there's a door there.
37
00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:13,280
I'll get some shots round the, er...
38
00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:18,000
front later on
and get a sense of the scale there.
39
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,080
Argh!
40
00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:20,600
Sorry I'm late.
41
00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:24,480
That's OK, I've only just got
here myself. Drew, isn't it? Yeah.
42
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:28,440
Phil Walker,
Goldfish Bowl Productions. Although I was involved in that.
43
00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:33,040
We spoke on the phone? That's right,
yeah. Thanks for getting in touch.
44
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:37,280
We've been looking everywhere
for a spooky location and we've had no luck. We've even been to Stoke.
45
00:05:37,280 --> 00:05:40,000
Well, I think this place
might be just what you need.
46
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:43,320
It certainly looks it
from what I've seen so far.
47
00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:47,800
You wait till we get inside.
48
00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:52,440
Health and Safety would have
a field day with this.
49
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:55,120
So you want to use it for a
Most Haunted, is that right?
50
00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:59,760
Oh, no, you said the M word!
No, this is a totally different idea.
51
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:03,000
We've got a team of psychics
investigating haunted houses,
52
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:06,560
and we're going to film them
with night-vision cameras
53
00:06:06,560 --> 00:06:11,080
so they're totally in the dark but
the audience can see everything. OK.
54
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:13,680
So how is that different
to Most Haunted?
55
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:18,160
Well, I haven't seen that show so
I don't know if it's similar or not.
56
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:22,480
But the big difference is, of course,
we've got Dale. Winton? Yep.
57
00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:26,160
He's sick of the balls,
he wants to get back to something edgier, like his early stuff.
58
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,440
What, like Supermarket Sweep?
Exactly.
59
00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:32,840
So the plan is I get some shots
tonight, you give me a bit of a tour. I take it all back to the director.
60
00:06:32,840 --> 00:06:36,360
If he likes it, it could end up
on Dale's Overnight Ghost Hunts.
61
00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:39,120
Catchy title.
Do you think? I'm not sure about it.
62
00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:42,760
If the place is featured, you get 250
quid and a credit on the end roll.
63
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,240
I don't care about all that.
64
00:06:44,240 --> 00:06:45,880
It's just...
65
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,440
when I saw your advert,
66
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:50,720
I knew I had to get in touch.
67
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:54,280
I grew up opposite this place.
68
00:06:55,280 --> 00:06:58,040
It's a massive part of my life.
69
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:02,440
But there's such
horrible memories too.
70
00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:06,280
That's what Dale says
about Pets Win Prizes.
71
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:14,440
I told you I met the Governess who
ran the place. When you were a kid.
72
00:07:14,440 --> 00:07:16,200
Well...
73
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:19,840
..this is where I met her.
74
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:25,000
No. Get... Stop it! Get off me.
75
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,640
Put me down!
76
00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:28,320
All right, Mitchell, let him go.
77
00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:31,480
Do you have a name, child?
78
00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,320
Drew. Drew.
79
00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:37,560
Well, thanks to you,
I've had to reset my alarm.
80
00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:41,720
What were you doing
creeping around in my office?
81
00:07:41,720 --> 00:07:48,320
Answer me, child, or I'll attach you
to Goldilocks here and set you both off screaming.
82
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:52,240
It was just a dare. For Halloween.
83
00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:55,560
I had to take something.
84
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,840
Did you indeed?
85
00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:06,120
Empty your pockets. Now!
86
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,320
Who do you think you are?
87
00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:21,720
Creeping in here and
taking private property.
88
00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:25,200
Do you know what this is worth?
89
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:28,800
Or what the consequences would be
should it be lost or stolen?
90
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,200
I'm sorry.
91
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:36,440
I didn't think. No.
People rarely do.
92
00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:40,400
Sit down.
93
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:46,240
I'm going to tell you
something about stealing.
94
00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:48,840
And about consequences.
95
00:08:56,400 --> 00:09:01,800
Something to make you think twice
before contemplating such an action again.
96
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:06,080
And I don't tell you this story
in the hope of frightening you...
97
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:10,920
..but I'm afraid it probably will.
98
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,000
It was Halloween,
just like tonight,
99
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:19,240
and a man who didn't think
about his actions
100
00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:22,920
was soon to be taught
a terrible lesson.
101
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:24,560
Nice costume.
102
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:27,360
It's not a costume!
These are me work clothes.
103
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:30,520
It's Halloween every day
for some people, pal! Idiot.
104
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,240
Look at that.
105
00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:34,480
What a waste.
106
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,520
I'll have that when I get in.
107
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,080
DOORBELL RINGS
108
00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,560
Trick or treat!
109
00:09:46,560 --> 00:09:48,480
Oh, you look scary!
110
00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,480
How old are you? We're both seven.
111
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:52,240
And can you read yet?
112
00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:54,160
What does that say then?
113
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:56,880
Shall I read it for you?
114
00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:58,480
No tricks. No treats.
115
00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:01,760
Where's your mother?
Is she hiding in the bushes?
116
00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:05,240
Oh, yeah, so you send your kids
out to do your dirty work for you?
117
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:09,600
They should be in bed. And she
shouldn't be having any chocolate by the size of her. Piglet!
118
00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:12,440
What are you supposed
to be anyway, green elephants?
119
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,880
Don't you have any treats for us?
120
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:19,080
Don't push your luck, kid,
I've drowned bigger cats than you.
121
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:29,440
Sorry about that.
What time can you come round?
122
00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:35,360
Well, let me have a think. I was
going to have me tea now so it's not laying too heavy on my stomach.
123
00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:38,400
Then I was going to watch
Exorcist 1 and Exorcist 3.
124
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:40,560
I don't bother with
Exorcist 2, it's shit.
125
00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:45,360
Then I'll probably do the pots,
just beans on toast, that's just a pan and a plate.
126
00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:49,120
I think I'll be ready for you by
about midnight, the witching hour!
127
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:51,520
And how much are we looking at?
128
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,040
80 quid!
129
00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:58,960
Yeah, go on then, I'll treat myself.
130
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,720
Perfect.
131
00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:11,240
DOORBELL RINGS
Trick or treat! Trick or treat!
132
00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:21,040
Go on, say it, then.
133
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:26,080
How old are you?
134
00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:30,240
Can you not read?
135
00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:36,320
Where's your mother?
136
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:41,720
Sod you then.
137
00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:56,640
Look, I'm not giving you things
just because you've turned up at me house with masks on.
138
00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,960
I work hard to earn money
to buy treats for myself.
139
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:03,320
All this tick or treat, penny
for the guy, Cancer Research...
140
00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:06,000
I don't do any of it.
Go and beg somewhere else.
141
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:12,800
Are you deaf as well as stupid?
I'm not involved in this night.
142
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:15,320
Me no likey.
143
00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:21,600
Are you even doing trick or treat?
144
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:28,240
You're weird.
All right, trick then. Piss off.
145
00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:30,400
That doesn't mean shoving
dog shit through my...
146
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:59,360
'And so he settles in for a night of
unalloyed male pleasure.
147
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:05,120
'A potent mixture of horror films,
junk food and a visit
148
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:09,640
'from a certain lady of the night and
I don't mean Florence Nightingale.
149
00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:14,440
'In short,
it was all treats, and no tricks.'
150
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:29,680
Eh? I don't believe this.
Where's the other one?
151
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:36,440
The Wiggles! Worse than Exorcist 2.
152
00:13:55,440 --> 00:13:57,880
Must have put them
in the wrong boxes.
153
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:02,200
Some five-year-old's going to be
shitting themselves tonight.
154
00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:07,920
CRUNCHING
155
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,360
Argh! ..Bloody little bastards!
156
00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:35,200
MAN'S VOICE: Hello?
157
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,280
Hello, yes, I want
to make a complaint.
158
00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:40,680
You want to make a complaint? Yeah,
I've got kids here tormenting me.
159
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:45,000
Tormenting you? They put a rat
in me Pringles and a load of beetles in my chocolate.
160
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,160
Beetles in your chocolate? Yes!
What are you going to do about it?
161
00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:50,360
What are you going to do about it?
162
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:54,400
Why are you repeating everything
I say? Everything you say?
163
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:57,360
Who is this?
CHILD'S VOICE: Who is this?
164
00:14:57,360 --> 00:14:58,960
Who is this?
165
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,480
Trick or treat.
166
00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:05,120
HAMMERING AT DOOR
167
00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:45,160
Boo! Aargh!
168
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:47,280
Sorry about that! I'm Janet.
169
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,480
Busty Janet?
170
00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:51,880
Well, what do you think?
171
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:57,480
It's nearly midnight and I've brought
some pumpkins for you to play with.
172
00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:00,600
You're my last trick of the night.
173
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:03,400
You're my biggest treat.
174
00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:14,120
So how many different attachments
have you got then? 16.
175
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:16,480
Oh! Better than a Dyson.
176
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:19,160
Yeah, speaking of Dyson's,
when are you going to start...?
177
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,840
All right, give us a chance, I've
not even taken me coat off yet!
178
00:16:22,840 --> 00:16:26,440
Sorry, sorry, it's just
been a weird night. How come?
179
00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:31,800
Never mind. So it says on your card
you cater for all disabilities? Yeah, that's right.
180
00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:34,160
They're much more
appreciative than most punters.
181
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:38,440
And they do all the work for me,
especially the epileptics.
182
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:43,480
I have a chap in
Chorlton-cum-Hardy gets me to wee on him once a fortnight.
183
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:48,280
I don't think he gets off on it,
it just helps with his psoriasis.
184
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:53,840
Now then, let's get them trousers
off, and get you latched on.
185
00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:56,640
GRUNTING
186
00:16:57,400 --> 00:16:59,640
Careful!
187
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:03,400
Ow, you're biting me.
188
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:05,520
Oh, it's too much! Ow!
189
00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:08,480
You're scratching me!
What are you doing?
190
00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:20,480
What's the matter, don't
you like it?
191
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:31,240
Trick or treat!
192
00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:33,280
I told you I haven't got any treats!
193
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:36,040
What's that in your pocket then?
194
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:42,360
Maisie, come on.
195
00:17:42,360 --> 00:17:47,880
I've got to go now. Be careful,
mister, it's dangerous on this road.
196
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:50,640
Some children died.
197
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,320
I'm putting it back.
198
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:24,400
All right?
199
00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:27,000
I'm sorry.
200
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:28,720
I didn't realise.
201
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:36,560
Hey! Where are you going? Stop!
202
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:44,880
Trick or treat!
203
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:51,320
She was right.
204
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:55,480
She scared me to death
with that story.
205
00:18:58,360 --> 00:19:00,880
But I never stole again.
206
00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:04,640
Sorry, I hope you don't mind.
That was just too good to miss.
207
00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:07,240
I can just imagine Dale telling
that story on the programme,
208
00:19:07,240 --> 00:19:09,480
sat in a big armchair like
Ronnie Corbett.
209
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:13,520
It's terrifying. I know.
So what's the story with the locket?
210
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:17,360
I've no idea.
Probably sentimental value.
211
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,000
Though she didn't strike me
as the sentimental type.
212
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:27,400
What is all this stuff?
Medical equipment mostly.
213
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:32,320
There were rumours she used to
do experiments on the patients.
214
00:19:32,320 --> 00:19:35,560
Like putting shampoo in the eyes?
Possibly.
215
00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:41,160
We'll never know now, will we?
Didn't she burn to death in a big fire or explosion or something?
216
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:45,200
So they say.
Some people think she's still here.
217
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,960
What, as a ghost? Yeah.
218
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:50,680
There have been several sightings.
219
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:53,400
Brilliant,
I'll get our researchers onto it.
220
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:59,680
I say researchers, it's one big girl
with an NVQ in Media Studies, but she gets some fascinating stories.
221
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:01,120
Like what?
222
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:08,160
Well, apparently there was a
patient here that had a doll, and she treated it as if it were a real baby.
223
00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:09,800
Yes, that rings a bell...
224
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:13,440
Joy Aston. I don't know,
we usually make the names up.
225
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:15,840
But you'll never guess
how she came to be in here.
226
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:23,280
'It was the day before Halloween,
and this woman, Joan or Joy, was trying to sell her house.
227
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:27,880
'It'd been on the market for weeks,
but she was rubbish at cleaning and they couldn't shift it.'
228
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:32,280
If you come through to the kitchen
or morning room, if you prefer...
229
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:38,640
Well, I'm sorry about the mess.
230
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:42,280
My wife was supposed to have
tidied up before she went to work.
231
00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:44,640
Women, eh!
232
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:47,920
But it's a very bright room.
We're south-west facing.
233
00:20:47,920 --> 00:20:51,160
Oh, hello! Don't mind me.
Just pretend I'm not here.
234
00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:57,640
I won't shake your hand
as I've been elbow deep in wombs since 6 o'clock this morning.
235
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:04,160
There's plenty of room here
to spread yourself around.
236
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:09,960
Can you look after
Freddy please, George, while I set up the breast pump.
237
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:13,200
I've got to express some milk,
I'm bursting.
238
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:16,440
So, how many children do you have?
239
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:18,920
Just the one.
240
00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:29,840
Well, shall we have a peek upstairs?
I'll just shift some of this stuff.
241
00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:34,640
One of these days, somebody's
going to break their neck.
242
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:39,520
Oh, dear, Freddy. Looks like
Daddy's cross with us again.
243
00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:47,320
Now then, let's have a look and see
if we can't extract a few dribbles for your din-dins.
244
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:48,840
Here you go.
245
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:51,280
MACHINE PUMPING
246
00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:57,200
Well, we've a few more to see so
we'll have a think and let you know.
247
00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:00,080
OK. Well, fingers crossed then, eh!
248
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:01,880
Hope to hear from you soon.
249
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:07,760
Cheerio! Safe journey home. Bye!
250
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:23,360
Do I look like a pig, Joy? Sorry?
251
00:22:23,360 --> 00:22:25,760
Do I look like a pig?
252
00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:31,120
Well, sometimes when you've
just stepped out of a hot bath...
253
00:22:31,120 --> 00:22:34,360
Why am I living in a pigsty? You've
got to keep on top of the cleaning!
254
00:22:34,360 --> 00:22:37,640
A place for everything and
everything in its place!
255
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:40,640
Well, it's not that easy with
a toddler in the house, George.
256
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:43,640
Freddy messes up the place
as quick as I can tidy it.
257
00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:46,360
48 viewings so far.
258
00:22:46,360 --> 00:22:50,440
48 people have walked out
that door and never come back.
259
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:52,160
Don't make me 49.
260
00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:06,360
Great, we'll see you
later then. Thanks. Bye.
261
00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:10,080
Well, miracle of miracles.
262
00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:12,240
That was the couple from yesterday.
263
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:15,080
They want to come back
for a second viewing.
264
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:17,840
Well, it's tidier than
it was yesterday anyway.
265
00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:20,200
I went through the night,
George, just like you said.
266
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:22,560
A place for everything and
everything in its place.
267
00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:25,640
Yes, you've done a good job, Joy.
268
00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:27,280
I'm very pleased.
269
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:35,600
Right, I'll just clear
away these breakfast things then.
270
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:38,320
Just pop them in the recycling.
271
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:08,480
No! No! No! No! No! You've put
the shell in with the bread!
272
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:12,160
But they're both food, George.
No, they are not.
273
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:14,760
Bread goes in the green bin,
biodegradables.
274
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:16,840
Shell is like bones
and goes in the...?
275
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,080
Yellow? No, that's plastics!
276
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,240
Shell goes in black, general waste.
277
00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:24,160
Oh, what's the red for again?
278
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:26,440
How many more times?
279
00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:31,320
Paper and cardboard, magazines
and newspapers, milk and juice cartons, tetrapaks and pizza boxes.
280
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:34,080
Waxed paper, tissue paper,
foam trays, tin foil. Tea bags.
281
00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:36,280
Not tea bags! They're biodegradable.
282
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:38,400
Blue. Green!
283
00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:44,000
Reduce, re-use, recycle!
284
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:47,840
Can't you get that into your
thick skull, Joy? Can't you?
285
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:51,640
Can you not get this one simple
thing into your thick, thick skull?
286
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,800
I'm trying, George, I am!
287
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,760
Reduce, refuse... Not refuse...
288
00:24:56,760 --> 00:25:00,200
Re-use. Reduce... duce...
289
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:03,520
Re-use... use... Recycle... cycle.
290
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:08,480
I'll be back later for the viewing
291
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:13,840
and you'd better have this place
spotless, Joy Aston, or so help me God...
292
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:24,280
'So she cleans the whole house,
top to bottom, and then sits down to play with her...baby.
293
00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:26,800
'But then she notices
what day it was.'
294
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:29,560
Oh, it's Halloween today!
295
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:32,720
Oh, we should do a pumpkin.
296
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:34,840
You got to promise not
to make a mess though?
297
00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:39,040
Now let's see,
it's 11 o'clock now...
298
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,120
Yes, we've got plenty of time!
299
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:52,120
And...out. And...bumph!
300
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:09,080
That's it.
We put the sharp knife in.
301
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:18,760
Cut it.
302
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:22,120
Slurp. ..Slop.
303
00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:25,000
And slop.
304
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:36,360
Ooh. Quarter past 11. Right, I think
it's time you had a little nap
305
00:26:36,360 --> 00:26:39,160
while Mummy has a quick tidy.
306
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:59,640
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
307
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:04,640
Come through. If you wouldn't mind
popping your shoes off for me. >
308
00:27:04,640 --> 00:27:07,320
We have just tidied and cleaned. >
309
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:12,040
And this, you may remember, is
our spacious kitchen/morning room.
310
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:26,680
It's just not as big as we remembered
it. But thanks, anyway.
311
00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:28,400
Yes, yes, cheerio.
312
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:52,800
Oh, George! You gave me
quite a fright there, George!
313
00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:56,240
What, um...
314
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:59,840
what time are they coming to look at
the house? They've already been.
315
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:02,040
Oh!
316
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:03,560
And...?
317
00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:06,320
Not interested.
318
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,840
Right.
319
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:14,160
Oh, well. Did you mention
the south-westerly aspect?
320
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:16,640
Well...
321
00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:22,120
what's the point of mentioning
the aspect when they can't even see out the bloody window!
322
00:28:22,120 --> 00:28:27,360
Why don't we go the whole hog and
just throw everything on the floor?!
323
00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:30,920
That'd be easier for you,
wouldn't it? Much better system!
324
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:34,720
There has to be some mess, George!
This is a family home.
325
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:37,720
No, it's not.
326
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:39,400
Because do you know what, Joy?
327
00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:45,000
There is no family.
328
00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:55,760
Let's see how you manage
on your own.
329
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:07,640
George?
330
00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:13,880
George!
331
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:23,400
Oh, what a mess you're making...
332
00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:33,520
Now then, that's better, isn't it,
my little Freddy Fruitcake?
333
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:38,880
Everything's nice and tidy,
just the way that Daddy likes it.
334
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:41,680
Reduced...
335
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:45,160
re-used...
336
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:47,280
and recycled.
337
00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:51,480
Happy Halloween.
338
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:10,440
Where did your researcher get that
story from? A friend of a friend?
339
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:14,040
I don't think she's got any friends.
Like I say, she is quite fa...
340
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,000
Why, do you think she made it up?
341
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:22,600
Joy Aston lost a child to cot death
then was institutionalised by her husband after a nervous breakdown.
342
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:25,760
Well, Dale did say he
wanted to do edgier stuff.
343
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:28,240
FAINT SCREAMS
344
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:32,240
Did you hear that?
345
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:33,880
Yes, I did.
346
00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:37,280
Did you bring anybody
else with you tonight?
347
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:40,760
No. It's Kenchington's ghost!
She's come looking for that locket!
348
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:42,960
Don't joke about it.
It's not funny.
349
00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:56,720
I'm going to film this in night
vision. It'll be just like DOGH. What?
350
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:58,880
Dale's Overnight Ghost Hunts.
351
00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:00,720
Oh, God. Can't see a thing.
352
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:02,440
Just wait.
353
00:31:02,440 --> 00:31:04,160
Your eyes have to adjust.
354
00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:07,320
Only takes a minute. I can't imagine
Dale doing this, to be honest.
355
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:09,920
Stumbling round in the dark.
He might scuff his shoes.
356
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:13,720
We'll need him in a studio somewhere.
Like an anchorman we keep going back to.
357
00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:16,320
Like Paul Ross you mean?
What? Nothing.
358
00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:20,920
I've got a story for you.
A friend of a friend one.
359
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:27,920
It starts with a blind
man who's just had an operation to get a brand new pair of eyes.
360
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:34,920
He was a toy collector, name of
Oscar Lomax, and he just couldn't wait to see his latest acquisition.
361
00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:36,880
Morning, Mr L.
362
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:39,000
How are your eyes this
morning, still itching?
363
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:43,480
Aye, I can't wait to get
these bloody bandages off.
364
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:45,280
I brought you some Roses. Ah.
365
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:47,360
Tealeaf.
366
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,160
Can I smell them?
367
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:55,640
Oh, your package came this morning,
the one you've been waiting for.
368
00:31:55,640 --> 00:31:57,920
Open it up then, open it up!
369
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:11,760
What? Is there something wrong
with it? You could say that.
370
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:16,520
Do you know how offensive this is?
371
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:24,080
I know, I know, it's got an ink
stain on the collar, but you'd never find one in mint condition, Tealeaf.
372
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,000
It's a very rare commodity.
373
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:31,440
This is one of the only
five remaining original Robertson's Gollywogs.
374
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:33,280
It's priceless.
375
00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:37,200
Where did you get it from? I had
to delve into the black market.
376
00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,480
No pun intended.
377
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:43,800
And when you do that it's best
not to ask too many questions.
378
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:46,120
Some folk would do
anything for money.
379
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:48,600
Here, let me hold him.
380
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:57,320
You're going to come and stay
with me aren't you, Jamjar?
381
00:32:57,320 --> 00:32:59,920
I can't wait to make you
part of the family.
382
00:32:59,920 --> 00:33:02,600
You're worse than Madonna, you are.
383
00:33:02,600 --> 00:33:06,200
Now do me a favour and put those
roses in some water, will you?
384
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:08,800
I've got a vase on the
side here somewhere.
385
00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:22,840
Do you want a little tip, Jamjar?
386
00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:26,480
Bicarbonate of soda
and half a teaspoon of vinegar.
387
00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:28,400
Pearly white for life.
388
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:35,800
That's better.
389
00:33:35,800 --> 00:33:40,600
Now then, let's get you to bed,
and tomorrow I'll take you home to my holy of holies.
390
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:43,280
Where are you? You've not
fallen down the toilet, have you?
391
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:46,880
Nurse? Oh, this is ridiculous.
392
00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:48,920
Wait a minute.
393
00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:02,600
Hang on.
394
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:05,640
Better just turn this light off.
395
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:16,840
Now then. Let's see what we can see.
396
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,440
Oh. There you are, Jamjar.
397
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:33,440
Ohh!
398
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:05,440
I can't believe you
took your bandages off. What did I tell you yesterday?
399
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:10,800
I'm fine, I'm fine, stop fussing,
you're like a nagging wife.
400
00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:13,320
I'm not going to need you
for much longer, Tealeaf.
401
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:15,520
I've got my independence now.
402
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:18,920
Yeah well, we'll let the
doctor decide that. He can wait.
403
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:20,720
I've got business to attend to.
404
00:35:20,720 --> 00:35:23,960
Come on then.
What's on the agenda for today?
405
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:26,680
You've had a request for an
estate valuation.
406
00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:28,560
What is it?
407
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:32,240
Small collection of period and modern
soft toys. You want me to pass?
408
00:35:32,240 --> 00:35:34,560
No, No, No, time to
get back on the horse.
409
00:35:34,560 --> 00:35:36,240
You never know what you might find.
410
00:35:36,240 --> 00:35:41,960
Arthur Negus once found a first
edition Mandy in a chiropodist's waiting room in Buxton.
411
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:43,840
Tell them I'll do it.
412
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:47,400
Cool. I'll go and find the
doctor and get you discharged.
413
00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:55,720
Ask him yourself, he's standing
right there.
414
00:35:55,720 --> 00:35:57,440
Where? There.
415
00:35:57,440 --> 00:35:59,800
He's just been examining me.
416
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,080
There's no-one here, Mr Lomax.
417
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:06,120
Only me.
Your eyes are playing tricks on you.
418
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:17,720
Who are you?
419
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:21,880
What do you want?
420
00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:42,760
No. No, the problem
here is that there's nothing left of the original stitching.
421
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:46,640
There's at least three different
types of cotton in her crotch.
422
00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:48,760
It completely devalues the item.
423
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,520
It is very old.
424
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,680
Old and worthless, I'm afraid.
425
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:57,560
Fine for a family heirloom but
useless to a serious collector.
426
00:36:57,560 --> 00:37:01,600
My husband thought there might
be one or two things of worth.
427
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:07,440
No. A bear with stitch-nose and cut
glass eyes, a ninth generation Andy
428
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:11,760
Pandy with indigo instead of the
original candy-blue stripe, and a
429
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:14,560
Happy Meal Pluto.
430
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:17,920
Car boot fodder, I'm afraid.
431
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:22,520
I'll offer you five pounds for
the lot, and that's only because I'm curious about your Bagpuss.
432
00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:27,120
Doesn't seem much. She collected
these since she was a little girl.
433
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:30,440
I know. But she played with them.
434
00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:36,200
And hugged them, and squeezed
all the worth out of them.
435
00:37:36,200 --> 00:37:39,320
Now they're just husks.
436
00:37:39,320 --> 00:37:40,760
May I?
437
00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:48,360
Can I ask?
438
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:51,040
How did she die?
439
00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:53,080
She died in her sleep.
440
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:58,240
Quite sudden, really, she was just in
her bedroom watching Eastenders
441
00:37:58,240 --> 00:38:01,080
and by the time
I came up with her Bovril
442
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:04,280
she was just sat there. Slumped.
443
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:09,640
Did she by any chance
carry a donor card? Yes.
444
00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:13,880
Her heart was no good,
but a kidney, they took.
445
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:15,840
And her liver.
446
00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:17,520
Even her eyes.
447
00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:42,520
Night night, Jamjar.
448
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:48,440
LOUD THUD
449
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:06,800
Is anybody there?
450
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,280
Who are you?
451
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:56,800
What do you want?
452
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:08,840
EASTENDERS THEME PLAYS ON TV
453
00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:32,920
Murdered? Yes, I believe so.
454
00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:38,640
I think I was given your mother's
eyes and I'm seeing what she saw just before she died.
455
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:40,400
She was watching
Eastenders, you say?
456
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:43,320
I think so, yes.
457
00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:45,080
That makes sense.
458
00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:47,720
I've done a drawing
of the man I think killed her.
459
00:40:47,720 --> 00:40:49,120
It's not perfect, but...
460
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,040
Does that ring any bells?
461
00:40:54,040 --> 00:40:55,680
Not really.
462
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:59,520
But why would anybody
want to kill her, she didn't do anything to anybody.
463
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:01,240
I only know what I saw.
464
00:41:01,240 --> 00:41:03,240
She was killed, I'm telling you.
465
00:41:03,240 --> 00:41:06,000
I think we should call the police.
All right,
466
00:41:06,000 --> 00:41:08,880
I'd better just tell my husband.
467
00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:10,400
Eddie! Ed!
468
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:32,480
'My husband thought there might
be one or two things of worth.
469
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,640
'I had to delve into
the black market.
470
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:36,600
'Best not to ask too many
questions.'
471
00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:37,640
Hello there.
472
00:41:37,640 --> 00:41:40,560
'Some folk
would do anything for money.'
473
00:41:40,560 --> 00:41:46,920
Now, what's all this
nonsense about a murder?
474
00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:49,200
Jamjar.
475
00:41:54,720 --> 00:41:56,680
Oh, that is brilliant,
we've got to use that!
476
00:41:56,680 --> 00:42:02,040
I know someone on 'Enders,
actually, wait till I tell them that. They'll piss. Can you see better now?
477
00:42:02,040 --> 00:42:03,200
Uh, yeah.
478
00:42:04,240 --> 00:42:06,880
What do you think
that noise was really?
479
00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:08,400
I don't know.
480
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:12,640
When I was little, I could
hear screams coming from this place at night.
481
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:16,000
My mum used to tell me that
it was just the seagulls.
482
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:22,960
Seagulls go to bed though, don't
they? Yeah. But the mad don't.
483
00:42:24,480 --> 00:42:27,040
No rest for the wicked.
484
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:29,520
Let's head out.
485
00:42:29,520 --> 00:42:31,080
So what happened with Kenchington?
486
00:42:31,080 --> 00:42:33,480
Did she let you go after
she got her locket back?
487
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:35,840
No. She took me on her
night round of the wards.
488
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:37,840
Oh, my God! Yeah.
489
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:40,280
She saved the best till last.
490
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:56,840
If I was scared before,
I was petrified now.
491
00:42:56,840 --> 00:43:01,360
She led me down the corridor
introducing me to all the patients.
492
00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:04,280
Then we came into the final cell.
493
00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:11,680
Now then. I think you owe
this poor creature an apology.
494
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:22,680
Hello, David,
how are we this evening?
495
00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:25,120
Can't sleep.
496
00:43:25,120 --> 00:43:26,960
I'm not surprised.
497
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:32,200
This young man fired 400
volts into your brain. Sorry.
498
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:35,320
I can smell a wet mattress, David,
499
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:39,480
have you been having
bad dreams again?
500
00:43:39,480 --> 00:43:41,800
Tell us about it.
501
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:47,360
I'm sure the child would love to hear
what's going on in your head, wouldn't you?
502
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:52,400
There you are, David,
you have an audience.
503
00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:54,320
Now what's on your mind?
504
00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:58,560
Well, in the dream,
505
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:03,120
me and my mum are on our way to
a party at Uncle Peter's house.
506
00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:06,280
But there's a problem with the car.
507
00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:08,080
And we get stranded in the woods.
508
00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:19,000
Stupid bushes.
509
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,400
I hope you haven't weed
on them boots, David.
510
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:25,080
I don't think so. Good. I borrowed
them from Mr Hayward downstairs.
511
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:26,920
Apparently his son's a pinhead.
512
00:44:26,920 --> 00:44:29,760
Skinhead. Didn't want to
wear this anyway. Babyish.
513
00:44:29,760 --> 00:44:35,840
Yeah, well I'm sorry, David, it
would have been in bad taste to go as Fred West. It's too recent.
514
00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:37,480
Well, why couldn't I go as Ed Gein?
515
00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:39,240
No-one would have known who you were.
516
00:44:39,240 --> 00:44:41,600
Yes, they would.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
517
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:45,160
A belt of lady's nipples and
a silver vagina on my face.
518
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:47,720
And where were you
going to get one of them?
519
00:44:47,720 --> 00:44:51,240
Could have made one? Out of what?
520
00:44:51,240 --> 00:44:56,080
Chamois leather. David, you are
not using my chamois as vaginas.
521
00:44:56,080 --> 00:44:58,040
You look good anyway as Frankenstein.
522
00:44:58,040 --> 00:45:01,720
Humph, Frankenstein is the
Doctor and I am the creature.
523
00:45:01,720 --> 00:45:03,680
Yeah, and I'm your bride.
524
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:10,200
Look! There's a car coming.
Maybe we can get a lift.
525
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:12,280
Check them out first though.
They might be weirdos.
526
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:24,640
Everything all right?
We were on our way to a party.
527
00:45:24,640 --> 00:45:27,400
Our car broke down. You
couldn't give us a lift, could you?
528
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:31,360
Of course. Jump in.
529
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:35,920
So I suppose you want dropping
off at the castle, do you?
530
00:45:35,920 --> 00:45:37,440
No.
531
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:40,920
52 Birchwood Avenue.
532
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:45,920
I told David to join the
RAC, and he disappeared to Stratford for three months.
533
00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:50,080
Yeah. I did A Winters Tale
with Simon Russell Beale.
534
00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:53,760
He's a good theatre actor,
but he's too big for telly.
535
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:57,480
And Anthony Sher's the same.
536
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,480
So I take it you're going
to a fancy dress party?
537
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:03,720
Yes, David's uncle does them.
He has parties all year round.
538
00:46:03,720 --> 00:46:05,880
Remember that Easter one
and we had to go as eggs?
539
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:07,760
Yeah. It was shit.
540
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:10,720
What's the matter with that lady?
541
00:46:10,720 --> 00:46:13,080
Oh, that's my wife.
542
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:15,640
We've had rather a
long journey I'm afraid.
543
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:17,760
She gets quite car sick.
544
00:46:17,760 --> 00:46:19,960
The best thing for her
is to sleep through it.
545
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:23,280
She looks pale.
Well, she's just taken two Valium.
546
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:28,840
Mum, pass me your mirror.
547
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:30,960
What for?
I don't think she's breathing.
548
00:46:30,960 --> 00:46:35,600
I want to check. Look, David,
the nice man's offered us a lift. Don't be calling his wife dead.
549
00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:38,200
I just want to see.
550
00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:40,400
Please, I don't want her waking up.
I won't wake her.
551
00:46:40,400 --> 00:46:42,400
She needs to rest.
I'll just take her pulse.
552
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:43,920
DON'T TOUCH HER!
553
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:57,440
Police reports today confirmed
the discovery of a fourth body on wasteland in North London.
554
00:46:57,440 --> 00:47:01,840
Not another one. Shhhh!
The victim was badly mutilated and the attack bears all the
555
00:47:01,840 --> 00:47:07,360
hallmarks of three other murders
that the newspapers are dubbing the work of the Stanmore Slasher.
556
00:47:07,360 --> 00:47:10,640
Police are asking...
557
00:47:10,640 --> 00:47:12,840
Rather morbid.
558
00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:15,920
If he does one more he'll end
up on your wall, won't he? Maybe.
559
00:47:15,920 --> 00:47:19,240
What's that? Oh, David's hobby.
560
00:47:19,240 --> 00:47:21,560
He collects serial killers.
561
00:47:21,560 --> 00:47:23,640
Don't collect them.
562
00:47:23,640 --> 00:47:29,040
Study them. He's actually worked out
who Jack the Ripper is, but won't tell me, will you? It's confidential.
563
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:31,640
Most of them are rather
pathetic individuals, aren't they?
564
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,440
I disagree.
565
00:47:33,440 --> 00:47:37,840
From what I've read they're
usually your average Joe Bloggs, just like you and I.
566
00:47:37,840 --> 00:47:40,640
There's always signs.
567
00:47:40,640 --> 00:47:43,160
You've just got to
know where to look.
568
00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:48,760
But don't they always get careless,
give themselves away?
569
00:47:48,760 --> 00:47:51,480
I mean, for example, if I
were going to dispose of a body
570
00:47:51,480 --> 00:47:56,400
I wouldn't flush it down the
toilet with a portion of Kentucky Fried Chicken to disguise the smell.
571
00:47:56,400 --> 00:47:58,080
Dennis Nilson, 15 victims 1982.
572
00:47:58,080 --> 00:47:59,680
1983. '83.
573
00:47:59,680 --> 00:48:01,840
Is that what he used, Kentucky?
574
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:03,960
Dirty pig.
575
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:08,400
David mixes in a couple drops of
my perfume if he's done a really stinky one, don't you, David? Yeah.
576
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:11,320
Tweed by Lentheric.
577
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:14,720
Makes it worse. Really sweet.
578
00:48:14,720 --> 00:48:18,840
So, who's expecting
you at this party then?
579
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,160
Is it just family?
I don't know half of them myself.
580
00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:26,000
Just various uncles. There's a whole
load coming in from Penzance dressed as The Addams Family,
581
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:28,920
though I'm not sure I'll be
able to tell the difference.
582
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:32,160
Are you all right, David?
You look a bit green? Yeah.
583
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:36,720
Can we stop the car?
584
00:48:36,720 --> 00:48:38,240
I want to use that phone box. Why?
585
00:48:38,240 --> 00:48:40,720
Do you need a wee? Tell
Uncle Peter we're going to be late.
586
00:48:40,720 --> 00:48:45,080
No! I can't stop just yet.
Stop the car! Now!
587
00:48:45,080 --> 00:48:46,840
Come on, Mum. You too.
588
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:48,880
I'm not getting out.
I'm settled here.
589
00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:53,440
Mum!
590
00:48:56,640 --> 00:49:00,760
The man drives away with
Mum still in the back of the car,
591
00:49:00,760 --> 00:49:02,880
so I go and phone the police.
592
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:09,400
Hello, 999 Letsby Avenue?
593
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:12,280
Yeah, I think my mum's been taken
594
00:49:12,280 --> 00:49:15,040
by the Stanmore Slasher.
595
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:22,880
Here, drink this.
596
00:49:22,880 --> 00:49:24,560
It'll calm your nerves.
597
00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:27,560
No,
I just want to go back and get David.
598
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:29,520
He doesn't like being on his own.
599
00:49:29,520 --> 00:49:32,520
He has to leave the door open
when he's doing his number twos.
600
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:33,800
Can we not go back for him?
601
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:37,800
I'm afraid not.
Look. You must understand.
602
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:40,360
I was only thinking about my wife.
603
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:43,960
Where is your wife?
Is she still asleep?
604
00:49:43,960 --> 00:49:46,120
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
605
00:50:05,960 --> 00:50:09,000
Hello? Oh, hi, Mum.
606
00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:13,320
Oh, we just got back,
607
00:50:13,320 --> 00:50:15,560
I think.
608
00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:18,760
I don't know, I was out cold.
609
00:50:20,280 --> 00:50:23,440
Yes, it was fine.
610
00:50:23,440 --> 00:50:26,920
I went as a bride of Dracula
611
00:50:26,920 --> 00:50:29,720
and Adrian went as Dennis Nilson,
612
00:50:29,720 --> 00:50:31,440
you know, the strangler.
613
00:50:32,960 --> 00:50:34,640
He gave me the creeps.
614
00:50:34,640 --> 00:50:36,720
Yes. Police, please.
615
00:50:36,720 --> 00:50:42,440
So my David is the Stanmore
Slasher, you think? Well, I never.
616
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:44,280
Just goes to show,
617
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:47,480
you never really know who you've
got under your roof, do you?
618
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:51,400
You really should have let me go.
619
00:50:59,880 --> 00:51:01,480
HE SCREAMS
620
00:51:07,840 --> 00:51:09,640
Ahhh!
621
00:51:22,720 --> 00:51:26,440
It's a full moon tonight.
She'll change again.
622
00:51:26,440 --> 00:51:29,760
You've got to stop her.
Please. She'll change again.
623
00:51:29,760 --> 00:51:31,840
All right, David. That's enough.
624
00:51:31,840 --> 00:51:34,960
Your mother's not a monster.
625
00:51:34,960 --> 00:51:38,160
You are. Come along.
626
00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:41,200
No. No.
627
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:46,280
Now then...
628
00:51:47,840 --> 00:51:50,760
..this is interesting.
629
00:51:50,760 --> 00:51:52,960
Look in here.
630
00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:58,680
What do you see?
631
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:00,880
It's empty. That's right.
632
00:52:00,880 --> 00:52:08,000
That's because this one,
young man, this one, is for you.
633
00:52:13,440 --> 00:52:14,960
Get him!
634
00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:18,720
I'll find you! I'll find you!
635
00:52:18,720 --> 00:52:23,920
You can't leave now,
you'll never leave.
636
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:25,840
SHE CACKLES
637
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:36,760
I want some closure on this.
I thought being involved in your programme might be able to help me.
638
00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:41,320
We need to get some
celebrities wandering round here. I'm sure the Dingles would do it.
639
00:52:41,320 --> 00:52:44,240
And I'd love to get Frank Bruno.
He'd tick a lot of boxes.
640
00:52:44,240 --> 00:52:47,520
Anyway, I've taken up enough
of your time already. Thank you.
641
00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:49,040
Do you need me to show you out?
642
00:52:49,040 --> 00:52:51,280
No, no, I'm going to go and
get some shots round the front.
643
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:52,920
I've not even been round there yet.
644
00:52:52,920 --> 00:52:55,280
OK. I'm going to grab my bag.
645
00:52:55,280 --> 00:52:57,480
I don't want anyone
knowing we were here.
646
00:52:57,480 --> 00:52:58,680
Except the ghosts!
647
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:10,600
OK. So I'm just going to walk
round the front of the building now.
648
00:53:22,720 --> 00:53:24,160
What is that?
649
00:53:35,920 --> 00:53:39,520
Is there a spirit in this room?
650
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:41,560
If there is a spirit,
651
00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:43,360
good or evil,
652
00:53:43,360 --> 00:53:46,200
commune with me.
653
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:47,880
Give me a sign.
654
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:50,480
EERIE KNOCKING
655
00:53:50,480 --> 00:53:56,040
What are you doing
snooping round in my office?
656
00:53:58,040 --> 00:54:00,760
Well, it's a simple question.
657
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:03,280
Who sent you?
658
00:54:03,280 --> 00:54:05,880
Are you the spirit of
Edwina Kenchington?
659
00:54:05,880 --> 00:54:08,280
Yes.
660
00:54:08,280 --> 00:54:10,480
Well, I was.
661
00:54:10,480 --> 00:54:13,800
Not any more.
662
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:15,440
Do you remember me?
663
00:54:15,440 --> 00:54:17,280
Should I?
664
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:19,280
I met you.
665
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:22,280
Years ago.
666
00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:25,640
When I was a boy.
Well, you can't be a former patient.
667
00:54:25,640 --> 00:54:28,200
You can form sentences.
668
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:30,560
It was Halloween night.
669
00:54:30,560 --> 00:54:32,400
I stole your locket.
670
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:36,120
Oh! I remember.
671
00:54:36,120 --> 00:54:39,040
Why was it so important to you?
672
00:54:39,040 --> 00:54:43,120
Why have you come back?
Unfinished business. Who sent you?
673
00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:46,320
Andrews, or Stroheim?
674
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:49,240
My money's on Andrews.
I don't know those people.
675
00:54:49,240 --> 00:54:52,040
Where is my locket? I don't know.
676
00:54:52,040 --> 00:54:55,840
Don't lie to me, boy! You took it
before and you're back here again.
677
00:54:55,840 --> 00:54:58,360
Who do you work for? Sainsbury's.
678
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:00,600
What are you doing here?
679
00:55:02,240 --> 00:55:05,000
I came looking for you.
680
00:55:05,000 --> 00:55:07,480
I just wanted to see a ghost.
681
00:55:10,520 --> 00:55:12,440
Well, that can be arranged.
682
00:55:12,440 --> 00:55:13,560
GUNSHOT
683
00:55:32,480 --> 00:55:34,280
'I received an anonymous letter,
684
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:36,680
'explaining that
my mother had been murdered
685
00:55:36,680 --> 00:55:38,440
'and a list of those responsible.
686
00:55:38,440 --> 00:55:43,360
'I took it to be a confession
from someone who could no longer bear the guilt.
687
00:55:43,360 --> 00:55:44,520
'David.
688
00:55:44,520 --> 00:55:47,240
'He was always
the weakest link. Goodbye.
689
00:55:47,240 --> 00:55:51,240
It wasn't David.
690
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:55,200
It was me. Mummy!
691
00:55:56,960 --> 00:56:01,160
You won't believe what I've just
seen... Oh, my God, what happened?
692
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:05,040
Kenchington. She shot me.
693
00:56:06,920 --> 00:56:08,600
She's not dead.
694
00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:10,240
What? Come on, we'll get help.
695
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:12,880
MUMMY!
696
00:56:15,720 --> 00:56:16,760
Look!
697
00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,960
You idiot!
698
00:56:35,080 --> 00:56:37,680
And this is all of it? Yes, Ma'am.
699
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:41,000
How many dead? Four dead, including
those two. And two more critical.
700
00:56:42,960 --> 00:56:45,440
What a mess.
701
00:56:45,440 --> 00:56:47,880
Please tell me we found it?
702
00:56:50,240 --> 00:56:53,080
No, Ma'am. No sign.
703
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:57,560
Well, we can't proceed without it.
I know, Ma'am.
704
00:56:57,560 --> 00:57:00,360
So deal with it, Kelvin.
We can't have any loose ends.
705
00:57:00,360 --> 00:57:01,400
Yes, Ma'am.
706
00:57:22,600 --> 00:57:25,240
Sorry, Ma'am, I just need
to get the file back. What?
707
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:27,720
Um. Can I get the file back, please?
708
00:57:27,720 --> 00:57:29,960
I'm burning it!
709
00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:32,600
That is our only copy, Ma'am.
We do definitely need it.
710
00:57:32,600 --> 00:57:34,200
Oh, for fuck's...
711
00:57:54,200 --> 00:57:59,120
Will you look after something
for me? We are very close to making our presentation.
712
00:57:59,120 --> 00:58:01,760
I think our lives might be
in danger.
713
00:58:03,720 --> 00:58:07,000
Hello. Hoytie Toyties.
This is it, Kelvin. Wish me luck.
714
00:58:08,760 --> 00:58:12,800
No loose ends. Remember, Kelvin.
715
00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:15,080
Kelvin. I need that locket!
716
00:58:19,120 --> 00:58:20,840
Nothing's ever
straightforward, is it?
717
00:58:31,320 --> 00:58:34,360
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
718
00:58:34,360 --> 00:58:37,400
Email subtitling@bbc.co.uk
719
00:58:37,450 --> 00:58:42,000
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