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1
00:00:00,542 --> 00:00:03,294
[Music playing]
2
00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:18,101
Theme song: Love,
exciting and new.
3
00:00:18,184 --> 00:00:21,521
Come aboard.
4
00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:26,443
we're expecting you.
5
00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:38,246
And love, life's sweetest
reward, let it flow.
6
00:00:38,329 --> 00:00:43,042
It floats back to you.
7
00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:50,175
The love boat soon will
be making another run.
8
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:58,975
The love boat promises
something for everyone.
9
00:00:59,058 --> 00:01:02,937
Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.
10
00:01:07,358 --> 00:01:14,616
And love won't hurt anymore.
11
00:01:14,699 --> 00:01:22,332
It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.
12
00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:24,167
It's love.
13
00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:28,671
Welcome aboard.
14
00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:29,714
It's love.
15
00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:54,155
[Mysterious music]
16
00:02:07,710 --> 00:02:09,587
[Chatter]
17
00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:10,004
Gopher: Bye-bye.
18
00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:11,381
So long.
19
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:12,173
Sir?
20
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,845
Frank fenimore,
private investigator.
21
00:02:16,928 --> 00:02:17,804
What can we do for you, sir?
22
00:02:17,887 --> 00:02:20,348
I'm looking for a young woman.
23
00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:20,473
Who isn't?
24
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,562
Her name is Doris Holden.
25
00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:29,274
I have information that
she's booked on this cruise.
26
00:02:29,357 --> 00:02:30,441
Doris Holden.
27
00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:32,819
Uh, we don't have anybody
listed by that name, sir.
28
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:34,153
That figures.
29
00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:36,197
She's probably using an alias.
30
00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:39,200
What does she want it for?
31
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:40,243
Oh, I read about this.
32
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,620
This is a big
juicy divorce case.
33
00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:44,914
Frank fenimore: She works
for state senator kadden.
34
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,584
Now she knows everything there
is to know about this case.
35
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:50,712
The only problem is she's
been ducking me for weeks.
36
00:02:50,795 --> 00:02:52,505
Well, if she is coming
aboard, she's going
37
00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:55,425
to have to use that gangway.
38
00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:59,804
If she thinks she's gonna
give me this slip this time,
39
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:00,388
she's got another thing coming.
40
00:03:08,187 --> 00:03:09,689
Mirror, mirror in her hand.
41
00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:11,691
The fair Julie expect a man?
42
00:03:11,774 --> 00:03:13,359
No, just something in my eye.
43
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:14,777
Yeah, anticipation.
44
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:16,487
Come on, you can tell me.
45
00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:18,698
All right.
46
00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:20,742
His name is Steve, and
according to my friend Sandy,
47
00:03:20,825 --> 00:03:23,202
he's a real catch.
48
00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:24,704
If he's such a catch,
why doesn't Sandy grab him?
49
00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:27,206
Sandy's a guy.
50
00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:30,877
And from what he tells me,
Steve has everything-- looks,
51
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,837
personality, intelligence.
52
00:03:32,921 --> 00:03:34,547
- And you believe him?
- Sure.
53
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:36,007
He told Steve the
same things about me.
54
00:03:36,090 --> 00:03:37,800
Excuse me.
55
00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:38,384
Julie McCoy?
56
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:41,429
Yes, how do you do?
57
00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:41,888
I'm a friend of Sandy's.
58
00:03:41,971 --> 00:03:44,307
You're Steve?
59
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,976
No, Leonard gluck.
60
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,269
Steve got sick, so
he couldn't make it.
61
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:49,354
Oh.
62
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:50,396
But I heard so many nice
things about you, Julie,
63
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,106
that I bought his ticket.
64
00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:53,483
I had to go and hawk
to get the money.
65
00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:58,112
But it looks like you are
worth it, even at 11% interest.
66
00:03:58,196 --> 00:03:58,988
[Chuckles]
67
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:00,990
How flattering.
68
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,534
I hope you're not
too disappointed.
69
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,870
No, no, of course not.
70
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:06,746
Leonard: Good.
71
00:04:06,829 --> 00:04:08,164
Because I don't
get a lot of dates.
72
00:04:08,247 --> 00:04:11,084
Now that's hard to believe.
73
00:04:11,167 --> 00:04:12,335
Oh, I almost forgot.
74
00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:12,710
I got something for you.
75
00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:16,589
[Zipping]
76
00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:19,676
Oh, thank you.
77
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,136
I found those in
the back of the cab.
78
00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,179
Lucky for me.
79
00:04:23,262 --> 00:04:23,721
Careful, Julie, this
guy's a real charmer.
80
00:04:23,805 --> 00:04:25,431
[Giggles]
81
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:27,141
That's right.
82
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:28,851
Well, I better go get settled.
83
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:29,477
[Giggles]
84
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:31,187
[Speaks poor French]
85
00:04:31,270 --> 00:04:40,279
[Giggles] One word out of
you, and it'll be your last.
86
00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:43,658
[Chatter]
87
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:52,125
May I help you, young lady?
88
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:54,794
Oh, uh, no thank you.
89
00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:56,337
My big sister's taken
care of everything.
90
00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:56,629
Oh, there she is now.
91
00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,256
Bye.
92
00:04:58,339 --> 00:04:59,966
Bye.
93
00:05:00,049 --> 00:05:00,883
Wow.
94
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:04,220
This cruise is going
to be outrageous.
95
00:05:04,303 --> 00:05:05,471
- Excuse me.
- Oop.
96
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:06,264
What's your rush?
97
00:05:06,347 --> 00:05:07,306
Come on.
98
00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:09,058
I think you and I should
get to know each other.
99
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:16,774
Oh, wow, you and me together?
100
00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:19,152
Wow, that would really
be neato mosquito.
101
00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:20,987
Jerry: For sure.
102
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:25,074
Your face is cute, but, gee,
your outfit's prehistoric.
103
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:28,202
Oh, well, um, this is what
all the kids wear at school.
104
00:05:28,286 --> 00:05:29,787
Mm, I can dig it.
105
00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:30,329
What's your name?
106
00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,540
Dor-- um, deedee.
107
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:35,752
All the kids at the video
arcade call me deedee.
108
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:37,545
Well, I'm Jerry.
109
00:05:37,628 --> 00:05:38,463
Hi.
110
00:05:38,546 --> 00:05:40,089
Like, maybe we
can party later?
111
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,758
What cabin are you in?
112
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:44,594
Well, that's for me to
know, for you to find out.
113
00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:45,720
Bye.
114
00:05:45,803 --> 00:05:49,599
Ah, to be 15.
115
00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:51,309
You are, gopher, twice.
116
00:05:55,354 --> 00:05:57,065
Ok, all checked in, son.
117
00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:58,149
Great, dad.
118
00:05:58,232 --> 00:06:00,777
While you were gone, I
met the cutest little fox.
119
00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:01,986
- Already?
- Uh-huh.
120
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:02,779
Let's hope your old
man can get as lucky.
121
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,781
[Inaudible].
122
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:05,782
Right.
Bye-bye.
123
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:06,741
[Chatter]
124
00:06:06,824 --> 00:06:08,367
Mr. and Mrs. Bakers.
125
00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:11,329
We have cabin 132
on fiesta deck.
126
00:06:11,412 --> 00:06:12,455
Welcome aboard.
127
00:06:12,538 --> 00:06:14,207
I'm captain stubing, and
this is my daughter, Vicki.
128
00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:15,458
How do you do?
129
00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:17,168
I'm certain I've
seen your face before.
130
00:06:17,251 --> 00:06:19,128
[Laughs] You see?
131
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,422
You're becoming more
famous than Johnny Carson.
132
00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,007
My husband's done
a lot of talk shows
133
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,801
because he won the
book club prize
134
00:06:24,884 --> 00:06:26,803
for the best novel of the year.
135
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,346
Oh, now I remember.
136
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:30,765
You're Daniel baker, the author
of that beautiful new book,
137
00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:31,307
"many years from now."
138
00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:32,975
Oh, you've read it?
139
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,936
Well, no, not yet,
but I've heard you
140
00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:36,312
talk about it on television.
141
00:06:36,395 --> 00:06:38,439
It's one of the best written
books I've ever heard about.
142
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:39,774
[Chuckling]
143
00:06:39,857 --> 00:06:40,817
You can take the elevator
to the fiesta deck.
144
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:42,568
Thank you.
145
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:43,277
Thank you.
146
00:06:43,361 --> 00:06:45,488
Enjoy your cruise.
147
00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:46,906
Excuse me, Mr. Baker.
148
00:06:46,989 --> 00:06:47,824
Would you autograph my copy?
149
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:50,993
Yeah.
150
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:51,994
My celebrity.
151
00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:53,913
I'm so proud of you.
152
00:06:53,996 --> 00:06:54,831
Thank you.
153
00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:58,084
You bet.
154
00:06:58,167 --> 00:06:59,752
Isn't that your secretary?
155
00:06:59,836 --> 00:07:03,673
Oh, uh, Ellen, I didn't
tell you before because I knew
156
00:07:03,756 --> 00:07:06,843
you'd get upset,
but I invited Wendy
157
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:08,678
to come on the cruise with us.
158
00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:09,470
You're right.
159
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:10,638
I am upset.
160
00:07:10,721 --> 00:07:13,766
I owed her something for
all the long unpaid hours
161
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:14,934
she's put in.
162
00:07:15,017 --> 00:07:16,185
Come on, meet her with a smile.
163
00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:18,437
You meet her with a smile.
164
00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:21,649
I'm going down to our room and
make myself very seductive.
165
00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:25,570
Then, I want to get down there
just as quickly as you can,
166
00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:29,740
so you can repay me for
the lonely unpaid hours
167
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:29,866
that I've put in.
168
00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:38,499
Wendy.
169
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:39,500
Oh, I couldn't get a cab.
170
00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:40,543
I didn't think I was
going to make it.
171
00:07:40,626 --> 00:07:41,961
Might have been
better if you didn't.
172
00:07:42,044 --> 00:07:44,881
Ellen is very upset that
you're coming with us.
173
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,090
Oh, she is?
174
00:07:46,174 --> 00:07:50,052
Well, just remember, Dan, I
can upset a lot more things
175
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,804
in your life than just Ellen.
176
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:56,517
Gopher: Well, Mr.
fenimore, maybe you're
177
00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:59,729
just wrong about Doris
Holden being on board.
178
00:07:59,812 --> 00:08:01,856
Could be.
179
00:08:01,939 --> 00:08:04,233
Look, just in case she
did give us the slip here,
180
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,736
there's $500 in
it for you if you
181
00:08:06,819 --> 00:08:10,239
will find her and let me know.
182
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,866
$500?
183
00:08:11,949 --> 00:08:14,243
You got it.
184
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,369
[Chatter]
185
00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:19,415
Sherlock Smith at
your service, sir.
186
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:31,719
[Horn blowing]
187
00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:58,120
Doris Holden: Well, deedee,
you had a short life
188
00:08:58,204 --> 00:08:58,538
but an important one.
189
00:09:03,292 --> 00:09:05,127
[Knocking]
190
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,963
Jerry: Open up, little fox.
191
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:09,632
Your dude is here.
192
00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,384
Jerry, oh know.
193
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:13,094
(In little girl voice)
Um, Jerry, could
194
00:09:13,177 --> 00:09:15,596
you please go away?
195
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:18,975
Um, I'm not dressed.
196
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,059
Awesome.
197
00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:21,435
(In little girl
voice) Um, Jerry,
198
00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:24,188
I think I'm gonna
stay in the cabin,
199
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,816
because I've got a headache.
200
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:28,943
What a bummer.
201
00:09:29,026 --> 00:09:30,361
Hey, maybe I can
call the doctor,
202
00:09:30,444 --> 00:09:31,654
and he'll bring
you some aspirin.
203
00:09:31,737 --> 00:09:33,614
(In little girl voice) Oh,
no, no, no, no, that's ok.
204
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:36,617
Um, you know, actually, i'm
feeling a whole lot better.
205
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:39,495
Um, you know how it
is when you're a kid.
206
00:09:39,578 --> 00:09:40,830
You heal fast.
207
00:09:40,913 --> 00:09:43,249
Uh, how about I meet
you up on the deck?
208
00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:44,959
Well, sure, but hurry.
209
00:09:50,840 --> 00:10:06,689
[Sighs]
210
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:07,440
Leonard: Boo!
211
00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:08,316
[Yelps]
212
00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:10,359
I got you there, didn't I?
213
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,485
Oh, you sure did.
214
00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:12,903
Yeah, I'm full of surprises.
215
00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:13,738
Oh.
216
00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:16,407
Back in school,
I was voted second
217
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:17,992
runner-up for class clown.
218
00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:19,827
How very impressive.
219
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:20,661
Thank you.
220
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,663
[Splashing]
221
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:24,540
Well, now that you know
a little bit about me,
222
00:10:24,623 --> 00:10:27,001
why don't you tell me
something about you?
223
00:10:27,084 --> 00:10:27,710
Where are you from?
224
00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:30,296
Well, I grew up in Oregon.
225
00:10:30,379 --> 00:10:31,172
You're from Oregon?
226
00:10:31,255 --> 00:10:33,382
Boy, what a coincidence.
227
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:34,133
Are you from Oregon?
228
00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:38,471
No, Ohio.
229
00:10:38,554 --> 00:10:40,514
We're both from states
that begin with an "o."
230
00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:41,724
That's got to mean something.
231
00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:42,475
[Chuckles]
232
00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:43,684
It must.
233
00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:46,854
Gee, Leonard, I'd love to
stay and chat with you,
234
00:10:46,937 --> 00:10:48,147
but I've got a
lot of work to do.
235
00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:52,651
Oh, well, if I could solve the
unemployment problem every time
236
00:10:52,735 --> 00:10:55,571
I want to talk to
somebody, they'd suddenly
237
00:10:55,654 --> 00:10:56,864
have a lot of work to do.
238
00:10:56,947 --> 00:10:57,281
Well, I do.
239
00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:59,241
I really do.
240
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,409
Well, I'll see ya.
241
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:01,160
I will.
242
00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,836
[Splashing]
243
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:11,796
[Claps]
244
00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:12,505
Hey, guys.
245
00:11:12,588 --> 00:11:14,340
[Chuckles] Hey, over here.
246
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:34,068
[Sighs] Dan.
247
00:11:34,151 --> 00:11:37,738
Dan come out here for a minute.
248
00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:41,951
Well, well.
249
00:11:42,034 --> 00:11:45,037
I told you I was going to
make myself very seductive.
250
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:46,372
This is it.
251
00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:47,623
What do you think?
252
00:11:47,706 --> 00:11:51,043
Well, do you mean seductive
"to persuade to disobedience"
253
00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:55,381
or do you mean seductive
"to lead astray"?
254
00:11:55,464 --> 00:11:57,341
I think more of the second--
255
00:11:57,425 --> 00:11:59,135
in fact, a lot
more of the second.
256
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,727
[Phone ringing]
257
00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:15,484
Yes?
258
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:16,694
Oh, hello, Wendy.
259
00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:27,621
Uh, ok, I'll meet you on the
lido deck a little later.
260
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:28,706
All right, all right.
261
00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:30,499
I'll be right up.
262
00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:31,333
[Phone clicks]
263
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:32,501
I have to go.
264
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,628
Wendy's arranged a
telephone interview
265
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:36,964
with a publisher who's
interested in my new book.
266
00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:38,007
Now?
267
00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:39,341
Well, it's important.
268
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:42,428
Well, it better be important,
because it's interrupting what
269
00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:44,722
I thought was very important.
270
00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:46,849
Aren't we ever going
to be alone together?
271
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:47,725
I'll be back soon.
272
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:48,517
Mm.
273
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:59,695
[Chatter, laughter]
274
00:12:59,778 --> 00:12:59,904
[Splashing]
275
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,115
(In little girl voice)
Take it easy, Jerry.
276
00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:04,408
You'll melt the ice cream.
277
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,201
Gopher.
278
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:06,535
Hm?
279
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:10,080
If the private eye could
not find Doris Holden,
280
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:12,374
what makes you think you can?
281
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:13,375
Because I'm like a bloodhound.
282
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:16,754
Once I'm on the scent,
nothing can stop me.
283
00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:17,922
You know, rover,
I think you're
284
00:13:18,005 --> 00:13:19,798
barking up the wrong tree.
285
00:13:19,882 --> 00:13:20,841
Could be.
286
00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:23,219
But if you help me, I'll
split the $500 with you.
287
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:26,889
$500?
288
00:13:26,972 --> 00:13:28,933
[Chatter, splashing, laughter]
289
00:13:31,435 --> 00:13:32,561
So this is the
reason I've barely seen
290
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:35,314
my son since we came aboard.
291
00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:37,608
Deedee, this is
my dad, Phil Howard.
292
00:13:37,691 --> 00:13:39,902
(In little girl voice) Hi.
293
00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:40,945
Delighted to meet you, deedee.
294
00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:43,906
Jerry's said a lot of
nice things about you.
295
00:13:43,989 --> 00:13:47,535
And now I can see
they're all true.
296
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:50,204
I told him you
were really tubular.
297
00:13:50,287 --> 00:13:50,663
(In little girl voice) Oh.
298
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:53,666
Oh, thank you.
299
00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:55,167
Are you on board with
your parents, deedee?
300
00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:56,502
(In little girl voice) Yes.
301
00:13:56,585 --> 00:14:00,548
Um, I mean, no-- uh,
just my big sister.
302
00:14:00,631 --> 00:14:03,217
Hey, I got this
really rad idea.
303
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:06,470
Why don't you and your sister
join us for dinner tonight?
304
00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:07,763
(In little girl voice) Oh.
305
00:14:07,846 --> 00:14:08,514
Uh.
306
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:09,306
Oh.
307
00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:10,933
Um, we can't.
308
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,768
I'm sorry.
309
00:14:12,851 --> 00:14:15,938
My big sister, she has that same
headache that I had, ya know?
310
00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:17,940
So I just thought I would
take something in the cabin,
311
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:21,235
you know, because I hate
eating in restaurants alone.
312
00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:23,612
Well, now you're
not going to be alone.
313
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:26,073
You'll join us, right?
314
00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:27,575
(In little girl voice) Right.
315
00:14:34,081 --> 00:14:37,167
Ah, this is the life.
316
00:14:37,251 --> 00:14:38,669
I was born to be rich.
317
00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:40,212
Right.
318
00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:41,922
And I was born to be married.
319
00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,215
[Splashing]
320
00:14:43,299 --> 00:14:46,594
If I don't bet back to Ellen
pretty soon I won't be anymore.
321
00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:47,303
Go ahead.
322
00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:50,139
I'll meet you both for dinner.
323
00:14:50,222 --> 00:14:54,560
Uh, listen, Wendy, uh, Ellen
won't want the three of us
324
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:56,353
to have dinner together.
325
00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:59,523
Oh, she won't?
326
00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:01,817
Then, I guess it'll
just be you and me.
327
00:15:01,900 --> 00:15:04,069
But be sure and tell Ellen
she's welcome to join
328
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:04,653
us if she changes her mind.
329
00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:07,031
Wendy, be sensible.
330
00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:07,865
I'm sure there are a
lot of men on board
331
00:15:07,948 --> 00:15:10,034
who'd love to take
you to dinner.
332
00:15:10,117 --> 00:15:12,077
What if I asked Julie,
the cruise director,
333
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:14,663
to introduce you to someone?
334
00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:18,542
Dan, the day I met you
I lost all desire to be
335
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:22,087
introduced to anyone else.
336
00:15:22,171 --> 00:15:26,342
Anyway, if you didn't want
to spend your time with me,
337
00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:28,761
why did you invite me on this
cruise in the first place?
338
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:30,929
You know very well why.
339
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:32,097
Oh, yes.
340
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,932
And we don't want
Ellen to know, do we?
341
00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:47,863
By the way, I saw this lovely
watch in the gift shop.
342
00:15:47,946 --> 00:15:50,366
I told the sales lady you'd
be in to buy it for me.
343
00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:54,870
[Sighs] I'll
see you at dinner.
344
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,793
You can sign up for
this tomorrow morning.
345
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:04,713
Hi, Vicki.
346
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:05,714
Vicki: Oh, Julie, I have
some messages for you.
347
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,217
Oh, I didn't know
I was so popular.
348
00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:09,218
Who are they from?
349
00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:12,346
Well, this is from
a guy named Leonard.
350
00:16:12,429 --> 00:16:15,057
And this is from Leonard too.
351
00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,975
And so is this one.
352
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,936
In fact, they're
all from Leonard.
353
00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:19,395
Who is this guy?
354
00:16:19,478 --> 00:16:20,979
Leonard: Julie!
355
00:16:24,066 --> 00:16:26,068
See for yourself.
356
00:16:26,151 --> 00:16:29,488
Boy, I haven't heard
from you all day.
357
00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:30,948
Yeah, well, that's
because I really haven't
358
00:16:31,031 --> 00:16:32,825
had time to take a break.
359
00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:34,743
Hey, listen, I figured
that since we were kind
360
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:36,995
of fixed up maybe you'd
like to have dinner with me
361
00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:38,163
in my cabin--
362
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:41,875
little candlelight, some
music, maybe a couple of brews.
363
00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:42,668
Well, gee, thanks, Leonard.
364
00:16:42,751 --> 00:16:44,878
That's awfully sweet of you.
365
00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:47,089
But I generally dine with
the captain at his table.
366
00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:51,927
Oh, and I'm not good enough
for the captain's table?
367
00:16:52,010 --> 00:16:52,928
No, no, I didn't mean--
368
00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:54,179
I don't want you
to feel obligated,
369
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:59,184
but I did take a bus
348 miles to meet you.
370
00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:00,978
Leonard, you
didn't let me finish.
371
00:17:01,061 --> 00:17:03,564
I wanted to invite you to
join me at the captain's
372
00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:05,941
table as my guest.
373
00:17:06,024 --> 00:17:06,984
Ah, that sounds like fun.
374
00:17:07,067 --> 00:17:08,736
Boy, I can't wait to
tell the captain all
375
00:17:08,819 --> 00:17:11,613
about my sea shell collection.
376
00:17:25,210 --> 00:17:26,462
[Rattling]
377
00:17:26,545 --> 00:17:29,548
[Chatter]
378
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:37,931
Well, this is certainly
better than eating alone, huh?
379
00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:41,018
I hope your sister feels
better in the morning.
380
00:17:41,101 --> 00:17:44,730
Excuse me, sorry to
interrupt, but haven't I
381
00:17:44,813 --> 00:17:46,190
seen you somewhere before?
382
00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:48,901
(In little girl voice)
Um, I don't think so.
383
00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:51,028
Well, I never forget a face.
384
00:17:51,111 --> 00:17:52,738
(In little girl
voice) Uh, well, I
385
00:17:52,821 --> 00:17:53,822
go to humboldt girl school.
386
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:54,698
Did you go to our junior prom?
387
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,825
No, my tux was
at the cleaners.
388
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,327
[Chuckling]
389
00:17:58,410 --> 00:18:00,287
But really, you--you
look familiar to me.
390
00:18:00,370 --> 00:18:02,247
Hey, look, like
it's highly unlikely,
391
00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:04,041
so why don't you just take
my advice and pack it, huh?
392
00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:07,169
Phil: Jerry, there's
no need to be rude.
393
00:18:10,088 --> 00:18:12,299
I think you have deedee
mixed up with someone else.
394
00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:13,634
Ok.
395
00:18:13,717 --> 00:18:14,510
In that case, I'll just pack it.
396
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:15,302
Later, dude.
397
00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:23,352
There you go.
398
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,145
Thank you.
399
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:27,648
I still can't get used to
signing my name for people.
400
00:18:27,731 --> 00:18:28,774
It embarrasses me.
401
00:18:28,857 --> 00:18:29,358
It doesn't embarrass me.
402
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,527
I love it.
403
00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:32,861
For years, I've been
listening to my sister
404
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,488
Gloria brag about her husband.
405
00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:38,200
Now even she will know that
my husband is more successful
406
00:18:38,283 --> 00:18:39,034
than her husband will ever be.
407
00:18:39,117 --> 00:18:42,412
If that sounds
infantile, then i'm
408
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:45,332
just the proudest, happiest
wife in her playpen.
409
00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:47,417
[Giggles]
410
00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:47,960
- Good evening.
- Oh.
411
00:18:48,043 --> 00:18:48,418
Oh, hello, Wendy.
412
00:18:48,502 --> 00:18:50,379
Hi.
413
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:51,922
Yeah, I guess with
one thing and another,
414
00:18:52,005 --> 00:18:55,884
I forgot to tell you I
asked Wendy to join us.
415
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,345
Yes, I guess you did.
416
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,725
Well, I'm so pleased that
you could join us, Wendy.
417
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:04,893
Thank you, Ellen.
418
00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:07,938
Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late.
419
00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:10,107
And I certainly don't
have a good excuse.
420
00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:12,025
I just got this
lovely new watch.
421
00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:14,528
Oh, that's beautiful.
422
00:19:14,611 --> 00:19:16,196
Wendy: Thank you.
423
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,198
Dan gave it to me for all those
nights we worked overtime.
424
00:19:27,082 --> 00:19:29,459
Vicki told me you invited
a date to dinner tonight.
425
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:32,421
Julie, you sly fox,
you-- you never told us
426
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:33,297
you had a new man in your life.
427
00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:35,632
Some things are
better kept secret.
428
00:19:39,303 --> 00:19:40,637
[Spritzing]
429
00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:54,276
Well, this must be the place.
430
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:55,235
Hi, everybody.
- Hi.
431
00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:55,986
Evening.
432
00:19:56,069 --> 00:19:56,778
Hi.
433
00:19:58,488 --> 00:20:01,783
Well, Leonard, that is
some Cologne you are wearing.
434
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,703
Oh, you noticed.
435
00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,622
Well, at $2.99 a
quart, it better be.
436
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:09,249
[Chuckles]
437
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:10,417
How much did he pay for that?
438
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:13,462
I've never had a smell
close up my ears before.
439
00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:16,548
So, what kind of
grub we got tonight?
440
00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:18,383
It's our chef's
special Caesar salad.
441
00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:19,760
Mm, looks great.
442
00:20:19,843 --> 00:20:21,094
Mhm.
443
00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:24,806
Boy, I remember the last
time I had Caesar salad.
444
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:27,309
There I was ready to
take a big old bite,
445
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:31,230
and what comes crawling out
of the lettuce but the ugliest
446
00:20:31,313 --> 00:20:33,357
looking bug I have ever seen.
447
00:20:37,527 --> 00:20:40,322
Just goes to show you, you
never know what you're getting.
448
00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:54,461
[Music playing]
449
00:21:06,848 --> 00:21:08,892
[Applause]
450
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:11,603
I didn't know you'd mind.
451
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:13,105
I thought you liked Wendy.
452
00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:16,984
I do like Wendy in
her place, which I think
453
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:20,404
is about 300 nautical
miles from here.
454
00:21:20,487 --> 00:21:22,864
I know how you've been
looking forward to this cruise.
455
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:24,658
What I can't
understand is why you
456
00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:26,785
thought it was necessary to
invite her along with us.
457
00:21:26,868 --> 00:21:29,579
Oh, I know, I know--
458
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:31,790
to repay her for all of
those nights she worked.
459
00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:33,417
Well, she did.
460
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,752
Well, you also gave
her an expensive watch
461
00:21:35,836 --> 00:21:38,714
for those same nights.
462
00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:41,133
What did she do all
of those nights?
463
00:21:41,216 --> 00:21:43,719
What are you implying,
that I've been unfaithful?
464
00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:46,388
I'm not implying anything.
465
00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:48,932
But you did give her
a watch and a cruise.
466
00:21:54,062 --> 00:21:56,732
Hey, what's the matter
with you two letting all
467
00:21:56,815 --> 00:21:57,899
that great music go to waste?
468
00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:00,610
Come on, Dan, dance with me.
469
00:22:00,694 --> 00:22:01,862
Uh--
470
00:22:01,945 --> 00:22:04,239
that is, of course, if,
uh, Ellen doesn't mind.
471
00:22:04,322 --> 00:22:04,614
Oh, I don't mind.
472
00:22:04,698 --> 00:22:06,700
Oh.
473
00:22:06,783 --> 00:22:07,659
As a matter of fact, i'm
going back to the cabin
474
00:22:07,743 --> 00:22:09,411
to go to sleep.
475
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:09,828
But it's still early.
476
00:22:09,911 --> 00:22:11,955
Oh, it is?
477
00:22:12,039 --> 00:22:15,584
Well, of course, you and Wendy
would know more about what time
478
00:22:15,667 --> 00:22:16,168
it is than I do.
479
00:22:16,251 --> 00:22:19,463
[Music playing, chatter]
480
00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:34,061
You know, like this music
is, like, totally lame.
481
00:22:34,144 --> 00:22:37,105
You can't even pogo to it.
482
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:38,440
Deedee?
483
00:22:38,523 --> 00:22:39,357
Deedee?
484
00:22:39,441 --> 00:22:40,650
(In little girl
voice) Oh, huh, what?
485
00:22:40,734 --> 00:22:42,402
Do you think the
music is totally lame?
486
00:22:42,486 --> 00:22:47,324
(In little girl voice) Oh,
no, I think it's very romantic.
487
00:22:47,407 --> 00:22:51,787
I mean, um, I think
it's tubular, totally.
488
00:22:51,870 --> 00:22:54,289
Well, I think it's a
shame for such a pretty girl
489
00:22:54,372 --> 00:22:57,125
to just sit here when there's
tubular music playing.
490
00:22:57,209 --> 00:22:59,795
Someone should be a gentleman
and ask deedee to dance.
491
00:22:59,878 --> 00:23:01,922
(In little girl voice)
Well, I'd love to, Mr. Howard.
492
00:23:02,005 --> 00:23:03,173
Thank you.
493
00:23:03,256 --> 00:23:06,635
That is, of course, if
you don't mind, Jerry.
494
00:23:06,718 --> 00:23:07,219
Oh, no, no.
Go ahead.
495
00:23:07,302 --> 00:23:08,762
Knock yourself out.
496
00:23:16,394 --> 00:23:20,232
Wow, you're a big
girl for your age.
497
00:23:20,315 --> 00:23:22,275
(In little girl voice)
Oh, um, wheat germ.
498
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:25,487
Does wonders for
building bodies.
499
00:23:25,570 --> 00:23:29,324
[Chuckles]
500
00:23:29,407 --> 00:23:32,828
(In little girl
voice) Um, Mr. Howard,
501
00:23:32,911 --> 00:23:35,372
is there a Mrs. Howard
anywhere around?
502
00:23:35,455 --> 00:23:36,665
No, no.
503
00:23:36,748 --> 00:23:38,083
My marriage was shot down in
the divorce courts years ago.
504
00:23:38,166 --> 00:23:39,626
Aw, well, that's too bad.
505
00:23:44,589 --> 00:23:45,465
[Fake giggles]
506
00:23:45,549 --> 00:23:45,841
Boy, that was fun.
507
00:23:45,924 --> 00:23:47,425
[Applause]
508
00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:48,343
Let's do it again.
509
00:23:48,426 --> 00:23:49,094
Oh no, Leonard.
510
00:23:49,177 --> 00:23:50,303
You said just one.
511
00:23:50,387 --> 00:23:52,556
Besides, if I kept
you all to myself,
512
00:23:52,639 --> 00:23:54,057
it wouldn't be fair
to the other ladies.
513
00:23:54,141 --> 00:23:55,767
Who said life was fair?
514
00:23:55,851 --> 00:23:57,519
[Fake giggles]
515
00:23:57,602 --> 00:23:58,687
Look, why don't
we get a drink?
516
00:23:58,770 --> 00:23:59,771
Oh, that sounds nice.
517
00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:00,856
I think I could use one right.
518
00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:02,232
Great.
519
00:24:02,315 --> 00:24:05,026
While you're up, you want
to get me a rum and coke?
520
00:24:05,110 --> 00:24:06,820
You get them for
free, don't you?
521
00:24:06,903 --> 00:24:14,202
[Fake giggles]
522
00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:18,165
(In little girl voice)
Oh, oh, um, I got to go.
523
00:24:18,248 --> 00:24:20,625
It's really way past my bedtime.
524
00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:21,710
Thank you very much.
525
00:24:21,793 --> 00:24:23,378
Um, will you say goodnight
to Jerry for me, please?
526
00:24:23,461 --> 00:24:24,171
Bye.
527
00:24:32,929 --> 00:24:35,098
You are coming in for
a nightcap, aren't you?
528
00:24:35,182 --> 00:24:39,019
Oh, I don't think so.
529
00:24:39,102 --> 00:24:42,731
Dan, I wasn't asking you.
530
00:24:42,814 --> 00:24:44,482
I was telling you.
531
00:24:44,566 --> 00:24:45,901
[Clinking]
532
00:24:45,984 --> 00:24:48,278
You don't think i'm
bluffing, do you?
533
00:24:48,361 --> 00:24:51,573
Wendy, I don't know if
you're bluffing or not.
534
00:24:51,656 --> 00:24:54,409
Otherwise, I wouldn't be
taking you on cruises,
535
00:24:54,492 --> 00:24:57,579
buying you watches,
and dancing with you
536
00:24:57,662 --> 00:25:02,959
while my wife, whom I love very
much, is in our cabin alone.
537
00:25:03,043 --> 00:25:05,086
Please come in
for just one drink.
538
00:25:05,170 --> 00:25:09,216
No, Wendy, this can't go on.
539
00:25:09,299 --> 00:25:13,428
Dan, this is not
only going to go on,
540
00:25:13,511 --> 00:25:15,639
it's only just getting started.
541
00:25:15,722 --> 00:25:18,433
[Giggles] And if
you don't like it,
542
00:25:18,516 --> 00:25:21,478
darling Dan, you should have
thought of all that before you
543
00:25:21,561 --> 00:25:25,565
lifted four entire
chapters almost word
544
00:25:25,649 --> 00:25:27,609
for word from some
forgotten book
545
00:25:27,692 --> 00:25:33,698
and plagiarized them for
your own prize-winning novel.
546
00:25:33,782 --> 00:25:34,741
[Sighs]
547
00:25:34,824 --> 00:25:38,578
Now, would you like to
come in for a nightcap?
548
00:25:45,710 --> 00:25:45,752
[Door closes]
549
00:26:09,943 --> 00:26:13,571
I was looking for the most
deserted part of the ship,
550
00:26:13,655 --> 00:26:17,742
but it looks like
you beat me to it.
551
00:26:17,826 --> 00:26:19,828
You look like a young
lady I just met.
552
00:26:19,911 --> 00:26:20,745
Oh.
553
00:26:20,829 --> 00:26:24,040
[Giggles] I don't know.
554
00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:28,003
I know-- you're
deedee's sister.
555
00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:29,921
That's right.
I am.
556
00:26:30,005 --> 00:26:32,007
I'm deedee's sister.
557
00:26:32,090 --> 00:26:33,049
- Phil Howard.
- Hi.
558
00:26:33,133 --> 00:26:33,591
Doris.
559
00:26:33,675 --> 00:26:34,509
Nice to meet you.
560
00:26:34,592 --> 00:26:36,303
I feel as though
we're old friends.
561
00:26:36,386 --> 00:26:39,973
[Laughs] Yeah, so do I. I--
562
00:26:40,056 --> 00:26:42,976
I guess it's us both
knowing deedee and all.
563
00:26:43,059 --> 00:26:45,353
You don't mind if I hold
onto this just for luck.
564
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:55,864
Well, [giggles]
Uh, i--i gotta go.
565
00:26:55,947 --> 00:26:57,157
Doris, I'm sorry.
566
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:58,116
I didn't mean any--
567
00:26:58,199 --> 00:26:59,701
was that her?
568
00:26:59,784 --> 00:27:00,452
I think so.
569
00:27:00,535 --> 00:27:03,288
Too bad we couldn't get closer.
570
00:27:03,371 --> 00:27:04,789
Looks like we missed
our big chance.
571
00:27:08,710 --> 00:27:10,086
Looks like he did too.
572
00:27:18,928 --> 00:27:20,013
Oh no.
573
00:27:20,096 --> 00:27:22,349
Oh, looks like our
Casanova's waiting
574
00:27:22,432 --> 00:27:23,641
for some moonlight romance.
575
00:27:23,725 --> 00:27:25,560
Doc, he's driving me crazy.
576
00:27:25,643 --> 00:27:26,978
I don't know what to do.
577
00:27:27,062 --> 00:27:28,355
Well, take it from a doctor--
578
00:27:28,438 --> 00:27:31,149
when you have a
pain, get rid of it.
579
00:27:31,232 --> 00:27:32,901
You're right.
580
00:27:32,984 --> 00:27:35,779
It's time I lowered the boom.
581
00:27:35,862 --> 00:27:36,863
I just hope he doesn't
take it too hard.
582
00:27:45,121 --> 00:27:45,372
Leonard?
583
00:27:45,455 --> 00:27:45,830
Oh, hi.
584
00:27:45,914 --> 00:27:47,916
Hi.
585
00:27:47,999 --> 00:27:48,208
Beautiful night, isn't it?
586
00:27:48,291 --> 00:27:49,876
Mm.
587
00:27:49,959 --> 00:27:52,462
All you can hear is
they sea and the wind,
588
00:27:52,545 --> 00:27:54,964
the sound of an
occasional seagull.
589
00:27:55,048 --> 00:27:58,134
[Caws]
590
00:27:58,218 --> 00:27:59,094
Leonard, we have to talk.
591
00:27:59,177 --> 00:28:02,847
About what?
592
00:28:02,931 --> 00:28:04,766
About us.
593
00:28:04,849 --> 00:28:06,518
Actually, Julie, i'm
glad you brought that up.
594
00:28:06,601 --> 00:28:08,353
Because there is something
that I want to say to you.
595
00:28:08,436 --> 00:28:09,396
Oh?
596
00:28:09,479 --> 00:28:11,648
Sometimes when people
meet on a blind date,
597
00:28:11,731 --> 00:28:16,653
it's like magic, love at first
sight, two totally different
598
00:28:16,736 --> 00:28:19,948
personalities making a
perfect combination, kind of
599
00:28:20,031 --> 00:28:23,034
like knockwurst and Sauerkraut.
600
00:28:23,118 --> 00:28:24,285
Leonard--
601
00:28:24,369 --> 00:28:27,122
unfortunately, this
isn't one of those times.
602
00:28:27,205 --> 00:28:28,123
I think you're a really
nice girl, Julie.
603
00:28:28,206 --> 00:28:30,875
But to tell you the
absolute honest truth,
604
00:28:30,959 --> 00:28:32,335
you just don't do it for me.
605
00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:34,337
Leonard-- what?
606
00:28:34,421 --> 00:28:36,464
It's nothing personal.
607
00:28:36,548 --> 00:28:40,260
I just don't find
you attractive.
608
00:28:40,343 --> 00:28:41,636
Let me get this straight.
609
00:28:41,719 --> 00:28:43,513
Are you dropping me?
610
00:28:43,596 --> 00:28:45,473
With a thud.
611
00:28:45,557 --> 00:28:47,308
Don't take it too hard.
612
00:28:47,392 --> 00:28:49,561
You're a young girl sort of.
613
00:28:49,644 --> 00:28:52,522
I'm sure you'll
find somebody else.
614
00:28:52,605 --> 00:28:55,442
I can't believe
what I'm hearing.
615
00:28:55,525 --> 00:28:58,486
You're not going
to cry, are you?
616
00:28:58,570 --> 00:29:00,155
Boy, I hate it when
you drop a chick,
617
00:29:00,238 --> 00:29:02,532
and she goes around
blubbering all over the place.
618
00:29:02,615 --> 00:29:05,285
Believe me, Leonard,
I'm not going to blubber.
619
00:29:05,368 --> 00:29:06,995
That's it.
620
00:29:07,078 --> 00:29:08,746
Be strong.
621
00:29:08,830 --> 00:29:10,957
You'll forget about me in time.
622
00:29:19,048 --> 00:29:19,757
Ugh.
623
00:29:33,688 --> 00:29:35,690
Aren't you coming
to breakfast?
624
00:29:35,773 --> 00:29:36,107
No, I don't think so.
625
00:29:36,191 --> 00:29:38,693
Why not?
626
00:29:38,776 --> 00:29:39,652
You're the writer.
627
00:29:39,736 --> 00:29:40,612
You can supply the dialogue.
628
00:29:40,695 --> 00:29:42,739
Aren't you coming to breakfast?
629
00:29:42,822 --> 00:29:44,115
No, I don't think so.
630
00:29:44,199 --> 00:29:45,658
Why not?
631
00:29:45,742 --> 00:29:48,244
Because I spent the entire
night waiting for you
632
00:29:48,328 --> 00:29:50,872
while you danced
with your secretary.
633
00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:52,832
That's not true.
634
00:29:52,916 --> 00:29:54,542
I had an idea for a new book.
635
00:29:54,626 --> 00:29:55,460
And we went down
to Wendy's cabin,
636
00:29:55,543 --> 00:29:58,296
so she could take some notes.
637
00:29:58,379 --> 00:30:01,591
Well, I'm sure that any notes
that Wendy took last night
638
00:30:01,674 --> 00:30:04,761
will never end up in
a children's book.
639
00:30:04,844 --> 00:30:06,679
Well, no matter
how it looks, I've
640
00:30:06,763 --> 00:30:10,558
never been unfaithful to you
with Wendy or any other woman.
641
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:11,559
Now, come on.
642
00:30:11,643 --> 00:30:15,188
Get dressed, and let's
go have some breakfast.
643
00:30:15,271 --> 00:30:20,693
Well, no.
644
00:30:20,777 --> 00:30:21,861
As soon as we started
on our ham and eggs,
645
00:30:21,945 --> 00:30:23,863
Wendy would probably come
up and ask you to dance.
646
00:30:33,289 --> 00:30:34,999
[Door slams]
647
00:30:45,134 --> 00:30:47,220
Well, Julie, how'd
it go last night
648
00:30:47,303 --> 00:30:49,681
with public nuisance number one?
649
00:30:49,764 --> 00:30:52,141
Well, I don't think we'll
be seeing each other anymore.
650
00:30:52,225 --> 00:30:54,269
Well, gee, I hope he
didn't take it too hard.
651
00:30:54,352 --> 00:30:55,562
Hi, doc.
652
00:30:55,645 --> 00:30:57,188
Hi, Vicki.
653
00:30:57,272 --> 00:30:58,523
Julie.
654
00:30:58,606 --> 00:31:02,527
Hey, Vicki, what's green
and black, and has 12 legs?
655
00:31:02,610 --> 00:31:03,319
I don't know.
656
00:31:03,403 --> 00:31:04,696
What?
657
00:31:04,779 --> 00:31:05,238
I don't know either, but
it's crawling up your arm.
658
00:31:05,321 --> 00:31:07,031
[Gasps]
659
00:31:07,115 --> 00:31:08,950
[Chuckles]
[Inaudible] [Laughs]
660
00:31:09,033 --> 00:31:15,832
[Fake laughs] Well, at
least he's not depressed.
661
00:31:15,915 --> 00:31:15,999
Wish I could say the same.
662
00:31:21,212 --> 00:31:24,716
Listen, dad, man to man,
how can you tell, like,
663
00:31:24,799 --> 00:31:27,385
when you're really in love?
664
00:31:27,468 --> 00:31:29,387
Well, that's a tough one, son.
665
00:31:29,470 --> 00:31:32,473
I've learned to follow my
stomach as well as my heart.
666
00:31:32,557 --> 00:31:33,224
Your stomach?
667
00:31:33,308 --> 00:31:34,517
Yeah.
668
00:31:34,601 --> 00:31:36,603
When some people fall in
love, they eat like crazy.
669
00:31:36,686 --> 00:31:39,147
In my case, I can't eat a thing.
670
00:31:39,230 --> 00:31:42,525
Well, I must be one
of the crazy ones.
671
00:31:42,609 --> 00:31:43,943
And if you're not
eating anything--
672
00:31:44,027 --> 00:31:44,819
[clinking]
673
00:31:49,741 --> 00:31:50,241
See that guy over
there in the red shirt?
674
00:31:50,325 --> 00:31:52,368
Yeah.
675
00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:55,705
That's the guy who was
with Doris Holden last night.
676
00:31:55,788 --> 00:31:56,497
Hey, gopher.
677
00:31:56,581 --> 00:31:57,624
Hm?
678
00:31:57,707 --> 00:31:58,958
I bet if we stick
close to this guy,
679
00:31:59,042 --> 00:32:00,001
he'll lead us right to her.
680
00:32:00,084 --> 00:32:04,339
Yeah, not to mention
the 500 smacker reward.
681
00:32:04,422 --> 00:32:05,381
You're right.
682
00:32:11,763 --> 00:32:13,681
[Chatter, clinking]
683
00:32:14,307 --> 00:32:15,892
Hi.
684
00:32:15,975 --> 00:32:16,934
Where have you been?
685
00:32:17,018 --> 00:32:18,144
You were supposed to
meet me 15 minutes ago.
686
00:32:21,105 --> 00:32:25,818
[Sighs] Wendy, I've
decided I'm not going to let
687
00:32:25,902 --> 00:32:26,986
you blackmail me anymore.
688
00:32:27,070 --> 00:32:30,114
It's ruining my marriage,
which is the most
689
00:32:30,198 --> 00:32:32,492
important thing in my life.
690
00:32:32,575 --> 00:32:35,620
When you made your speech
accepting your literary prize,
691
00:32:35,703 --> 00:32:39,415
you said that was the most
important thing in your life.
692
00:32:39,499 --> 00:32:41,709
I wish I'd never
written that novel.
693
00:32:41,793 --> 00:32:45,838
As we both know,
Dan, you didn't--
694
00:32:45,922 --> 00:32:47,757
at least, not all of it.
695
00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:49,050
All right, Wendy,
how much money
696
00:32:49,133 --> 00:32:54,097
do you want to stop blackmailing
me once and for all?
697
00:32:54,180 --> 00:32:56,849
Now I see why you had to
steal someone else's book.
698
00:32:56,933 --> 00:32:58,059
What do you mean?
699
00:32:58,142 --> 00:33:00,770
I mean you're not as bright
as I gave you credit for.
700
00:33:00,853 --> 00:33:01,604
I don't want money.
701
00:33:03,940 --> 00:33:07,276
I want to be married
to a prize winner.
702
00:33:17,995 --> 00:33:20,164
Vicki (on speaker):
Good morning,
703
00:33:20,248 --> 00:33:24,168
and welcome to Puerta vallarta,
Mexico's answer to paradise.
704
00:33:24,252 --> 00:33:27,088
We'll be in port all
afternoon, so you'll
705
00:33:27,171 --> 00:33:28,297
have plenty of time
to take advantage
706
00:33:28,381 --> 00:33:32,009
of all this charming town
has to offer. Enjoy your day!
707
00:33:40,685 --> 00:33:43,187
[Seagulls cawing]
708
00:33:46,232 --> 00:33:48,985
Still feel bad about
dumping Leonard, huh?
709
00:33:49,068 --> 00:33:52,029
I'd really rather
not talk about it, doc.
710
00:33:52,113 --> 00:33:53,906
Well, he must be used to it.
711
00:33:53,990 --> 00:33:57,785
Guys like him get rejected
12 times before lunch.
712
00:33:57,869 --> 00:33:59,036
Can I ask you something?
713
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:00,371
Sure.
714
00:34:00,455 --> 00:34:01,456
Am I attractive?
715
00:34:01,539 --> 00:34:03,833
On a scale of one to 10,
you're a definite three.
716
00:34:03,916 --> 00:34:07,420
Of course you're
attractive. Why?
717
00:34:07,503 --> 00:34:09,172
Well, what about
my personality?
718
00:34:09,255 --> 00:34:10,631
Is there something missing?
719
00:34:10,715 --> 00:34:11,883
Julie, what's this all about?
720
00:34:11,966 --> 00:34:13,301
Are you all right?
721
00:34:13,384 --> 00:34:15,970
I used to think
I was all right.
722
00:34:16,053 --> 00:34:17,305
I can't believe it.
723
00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:20,475
Last night I was all set
to let Leonard down easy.
724
00:34:20,558 --> 00:34:22,560
But before I could,
he rejected me.
725
00:34:22,643 --> 00:34:23,478
You're kidding.
726
00:34:23,561 --> 00:34:24,562
Julie: No.
727
00:34:24,645 --> 00:34:27,065
Amazing.
728
00:34:27,148 --> 00:34:28,483
What's the matter with me?
729
00:34:28,566 --> 00:34:29,901
Nothing's the matter with you.
730
00:34:29,984 --> 00:34:31,944
That's not what
Leonard thinks.
731
00:34:32,028 --> 00:34:33,863
Julie, you wanted
to get rid of him.
732
00:34:33,946 --> 00:34:36,574
So now that you have,
consider it a blessing.
733
00:34:36,657 --> 00:34:38,493
You're right.
734
00:34:38,576 --> 00:34:41,329
Who cares why he
isn't attracted to me?
735
00:34:41,412 --> 00:34:42,079
I care.
736
00:34:52,423 --> 00:34:54,509
Dad?
737
00:34:54,592 --> 00:34:55,259
What are you doing here?
738
00:34:55,343 --> 00:34:57,929
I came to apologize to Doris.
739
00:34:58,012 --> 00:35:00,515
I may have come on
too strong last night.
740
00:35:00,598 --> 00:35:01,641
Well, you were lucky.
741
00:35:01,724 --> 00:35:03,351
I didn't even get a shot.
742
00:35:03,434 --> 00:35:05,394
That deedee, she turns
me on to the Max.
743
00:35:05,478 --> 00:35:08,022
[Knocking]
744
00:35:08,105 --> 00:35:09,232
Who is it?
745
00:35:09,315 --> 00:35:10,483
Phil: Doris, it's Phil.
746
00:35:10,566 --> 00:35:11,776
Oh, Phil, how nice.
747
00:35:14,862 --> 00:35:16,030
I'm also here to see deedee.
748
00:35:16,114 --> 00:35:17,782
[Door slams]
749
00:35:17,865 --> 00:35:20,493
Oh, Phil, I'm sorry.
750
00:35:20,576 --> 00:35:21,410
I'm getting dressed.
751
00:35:21,494 --> 00:35:23,704
Could I meet you up
on the deck later?
752
00:35:23,788 --> 00:35:24,705
Yeah.
753
00:35:24,789 --> 00:35:26,415
Wonderful.
754
00:35:26,499 --> 00:35:28,125
Well, when can I get
to see you, deedee?
755
00:35:28,209 --> 00:35:31,712
(In little girl
voice) Um, Jerry?
756
00:35:31,796 --> 00:35:34,132
Uh, you know, i'm
not feeling so good.
757
00:35:34,215 --> 00:35:35,299
I think I'm sick again.
758
00:35:35,383 --> 00:35:38,052
Look, I'll just stay out
here till you get better?
759
00:35:38,135 --> 00:35:39,387
(In little girl voice) Aw, no.
760
00:35:39,470 --> 00:35:41,264
Um, I'm sure I'll
be better soon.
761
00:35:41,347 --> 00:35:44,350
Can I meet you up on
the deck later too?
762
00:35:44,433 --> 00:35:45,268
Ok, ladies.
763
00:35:45,351 --> 00:35:45,393
We'll be waiting.
764
00:35:49,605 --> 00:35:50,523
[Whistling]
765
00:35:50,606 --> 00:35:53,067
[Inaudible]
766
00:35:53,150 --> 00:35:56,904
Hi, gentlemen.
767
00:35:56,988 --> 00:35:58,406
Now we know which
cabin she's in.
768
00:35:58,489 --> 00:36:00,700
Now you know which
cabin who's in?
769
00:36:00,783 --> 00:36:01,909
[Inaudible]
770
00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:03,202
Sir, there is a lady
on board this ship
771
00:36:03,286 --> 00:36:07,999
who was supposed to
testify in a divorce case.
772
00:36:08,082 --> 00:36:09,625
And a private
detective offered
773
00:36:09,709 --> 00:36:12,503
us $500 dollars to find her.
774
00:36:12,587 --> 00:36:14,297
Well, I'll be offering
you your walking
775
00:36:14,380 --> 00:36:17,425
papers if you're not back on
duty in exactly one minute
776
00:36:17,508 --> 00:36:19,135
flat.
777
00:36:19,218 --> 00:36:20,177
Just left, sir.
778
00:36:20,261 --> 00:36:22,430
I don't suppose
you'd be interested--
779
00:36:22,513 --> 00:36:23,181
no.
780
00:36:29,312 --> 00:36:32,565
[Seagulls cawing]
781
00:36:35,192 --> 00:36:37,612
Hi, Leonard, would you like
to go for a walk on deck?
782
00:36:37,695 --> 00:36:40,948
Listen, lady, back off.
783
00:36:41,032 --> 00:36:43,951
I tried to be nice to you last
night and let you down easy,
784
00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,704
so quit bugging me, ok?
785
00:36:46,787 --> 00:36:47,246
Please.
786
00:36:47,330 --> 00:36:49,957
Don't beg, Julie.
787
00:36:50,041 --> 00:36:50,791
You're better than that.
788
00:36:50,875 --> 00:36:53,294
I wasn't begging.
789
00:36:53,377 --> 00:36:54,795
There are plenty of
other guys on this ship.
790
00:36:54,879 --> 00:36:57,214
You could find somebody else.
791
00:36:57,298 --> 00:37:01,469
But please, for both of
our sakes, quit chasing me.
792
00:37:06,057 --> 00:37:08,559
[Clapping]
793
00:37:08,643 --> 00:37:09,852
That was very good, Leonard.
794
00:37:09,936 --> 00:37:13,564
Now if anyone else would like
to audition for the ship's play,
795
00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:14,482
you can sign up in the lobby.
796
00:37:14,565 --> 00:37:17,818
[Applause]
797
00:37:17,902 --> 00:37:21,781
[Rustling]
798
00:37:21,864 --> 00:37:26,452
Ellen, uh-- why
are you doing this?
799
00:37:29,455 --> 00:37:30,414
Aren't you even
going to answer me?
800
00:37:30,498 --> 00:37:33,626
I'm getting off this
ship and flying home.
801
00:37:33,709 --> 00:37:36,295
Listen, Ellen, I know
you won't believe me,
802
00:37:36,379 --> 00:37:40,841
but I really have been working
on a new idea with Wendy.
803
00:37:40,925 --> 00:37:43,094
[Scoffs]
804
00:37:43,177 --> 00:37:45,096
You know I never
discuss my work
805
00:37:45,179 --> 00:37:49,558
with you until I'm finished,
but I'll tell you my idea.
806
00:37:49,642 --> 00:37:50,393
Sit down a second.
807
00:37:53,771 --> 00:37:55,481
What is it?
808
00:37:55,564 --> 00:37:57,483
Well, this new
plot I've got is
809
00:37:57,566 --> 00:38:01,320
about a prize-winning novelist.
810
00:38:01,404 --> 00:38:04,407
And without his wife
knowing about it,
811
00:38:04,490 --> 00:38:07,410
the novelist stole
three or four chapters
812
00:38:07,493 --> 00:38:12,415
from another novel that was
published a long time ago.
813
00:38:12,498 --> 00:38:16,669
And now, the novelist's
secretary is blackmailing him.
814
00:38:16,752 --> 00:38:19,505
And he-- and he
can't tell his wife
815
00:38:19,588 --> 00:38:23,134
because it's so humiliating
and because he'd die if he
816
00:38:23,217 --> 00:38:27,096
didn't have his wife's respect.
817
00:38:27,179 --> 00:38:27,304
Well, what do you think?
818
00:38:31,183 --> 00:38:32,101
It's a bit melodramatic.
819
00:38:32,184 --> 00:38:35,604
Why don't you work
on the ending?
820
00:38:35,688 --> 00:38:36,397
Ellen.
821
00:38:39,984 --> 00:38:41,986
[Rustling]
822
00:38:50,911 --> 00:38:53,330
[Knocking]
823
00:38:53,414 --> 00:38:54,165
Open sesame.
824
00:38:58,502 --> 00:38:58,544
[Door closes]
825
00:39:00,504 --> 00:39:05,301
I'm sorry to bother you,
Leonard, but I have to.
826
00:39:05,384 --> 00:39:07,011
I have to find out
what it is about me
827
00:39:07,094 --> 00:39:08,763
that you dislike so much.
828
00:39:08,846 --> 00:39:12,933
Uh, Julie, don't
get yourself crazy.
829
00:39:13,017 --> 00:39:14,935
Let's just say
you're not my type.
830
00:39:15,019 --> 00:39:16,979
Let it go at that.
831
00:39:17,063 --> 00:39:19,607
Well, what exactly
is your type?
832
00:39:19,690 --> 00:39:22,276
I happen to be an
attractive, intelligent woman.
833
00:39:22,359 --> 00:39:23,027
And there are a lot
of men out there
834
00:39:23,110 --> 00:39:25,780
who find me very desirable.
835
00:39:25,863 --> 00:39:26,197
Oh, really?
836
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:27,531
[Chuckles]
837
00:39:27,615 --> 00:39:28,783
Yes, really.
838
00:39:28,866 --> 00:39:31,452
And besides that, a lot of them
think I'm pretty damn sexy.
839
00:39:35,081 --> 00:39:35,998
Sexy?
840
00:39:36,082 --> 00:39:38,626
Yeah.
841
00:39:38,709 --> 00:39:39,960
You said it, baby.
842
00:39:40,044 --> 00:39:41,045
And I'm one of them.
843
00:39:41,128 --> 00:39:42,797
What are you doing?
844
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:43,964
I think it's pretty obvious.
845
00:39:44,048 --> 00:39:44,965
What's gotten into you?
846
00:39:45,049 --> 00:39:47,593
Passion, my little mermaid.
847
00:39:47,676 --> 00:39:48,302
Leonard.
848
00:39:48,385 --> 00:39:50,221
Don't fight it, Julie.
849
00:39:50,304 --> 00:39:50,971
It's in the stars.
850
00:39:51,055 --> 00:39:53,057
You want to see stars?
851
00:39:53,140 --> 00:39:55,351
Take one more step.
852
00:39:55,434 --> 00:39:59,605
Julie, please
stay, and I promise
853
00:39:59,688 --> 00:40:00,815
this is a night you'll remember
for the rest of your life.
854
00:40:00,898 --> 00:40:02,483
I know.
855
00:40:02,566 --> 00:40:02,608
That's why I'm leaving.
856
00:40:06,445 --> 00:40:06,487
[Door slams]
857
00:40:23,504 --> 00:40:25,673
Well, Doris
Holden, alias deedee.
858
00:40:25,756 --> 00:40:26,590
Ah, haha.
859
00:40:26,674 --> 00:40:29,510
Well, I guess I
can't stay 15 forever.
860
00:40:29,593 --> 00:40:31,303
I'm afraid not.
861
00:40:31,387 --> 00:40:33,055
Listen, before you
call that detective,
862
00:40:33,139 --> 00:40:35,141
would you please let me
tell my side of the story?
863
00:40:35,224 --> 00:40:37,518
- Huh.
- Sounds fair to me.
864
00:40:37,601 --> 00:40:38,227
Ok.
865
00:40:38,310 --> 00:40:39,895
Ok.
866
00:40:39,979 --> 00:40:43,399
Uh, I've been senator
kadden's assistant
867
00:40:43,482 --> 00:40:44,525
for the past five years.
868
00:40:44,608 --> 00:40:48,070
I've become very close
with both him and his wife.
869
00:40:48,154 --> 00:40:49,321
And they've told me
things in confidence
870
00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:51,198
I would never reveal in court.
871
00:40:51,282 --> 00:40:53,784
It would hurt them too much.
872
00:40:53,868 --> 00:40:55,369
If you were me,
what would you do?
873
00:40:55,452 --> 00:40:57,538
Well, if it isn't
the Hardy boys.
874
00:40:57,621 --> 00:41:00,374
Is this the young lady
you've been looking for?
875
00:41:06,088 --> 00:41:07,047
No, sir.
876
00:41:07,131 --> 00:41:10,885
On your wise advice, we
gave up that assignment.
877
00:41:10,968 --> 00:41:13,053
Yeah, sir, the
lady in question
878
00:41:13,137 --> 00:41:14,889
is not aboard this ship.
879
00:41:14,972 --> 00:41:15,764
Well, I'm delighted.
880
00:41:15,848 --> 00:41:16,891
Now I'll have the
pleasure of having
881
00:41:16,974 --> 00:41:21,896
my purser and chief barman
back with me full time.
882
00:41:21,979 --> 00:41:23,230
Oh, yes, in answer
to your question,
883
00:41:23,314 --> 00:41:25,065
the acapulco lounge is
just around that way.
884
00:41:25,149 --> 00:41:27,193
Thank you very much.
885
00:41:27,276 --> 00:41:27,484
A right and then a left.
886
00:41:32,990 --> 00:41:33,657
Well.
887
00:41:41,665 --> 00:41:44,376
Julie (on speaker): We
hope you enjoyed your day
888
00:41:44,460 --> 00:41:45,669
in beautiful Puerta vallarta.
889
00:41:45,753 --> 00:41:48,923
We expect clear skies and smooth
sailing on our return trip
890
00:41:49,006 --> 00:41:50,257
to Los Angeles.
891
00:41:59,850 --> 00:42:01,393
Hi.
892
00:42:01,477 --> 00:42:03,938
I've been on every
deck on the ship twice.
893
00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:05,147
I didn't think you were coming.
894
00:42:05,231 --> 00:42:07,608
Oh, um, I got sidetracked.
895
00:42:07,691 --> 00:42:08,317
It's a long story.
896
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:10,611
And I don't want to hear it.
897
00:42:10,694 --> 00:42:12,071
You're here now, and that tells
me everything I want to know.
898
00:42:12,154 --> 00:42:14,865
Well, not everything.
899
00:42:21,288 --> 00:42:22,790
You know, this
is really grodie.
900
00:42:22,873 --> 00:42:24,083
I've been on every
deck on the ship,
901
00:42:24,166 --> 00:42:26,210
and I can't find
deedee anywhere.
902
00:42:26,293 --> 00:42:27,920
Well, when you see
her, tell her her sister
903
00:42:28,003 --> 00:42:30,506
and I are going to be
very close from now on.
904
00:42:30,589 --> 00:42:33,384
Very, very close.
905
00:42:33,467 --> 00:42:35,636
Hey, outrageous.
906
00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:37,429
Hey, I wonder what
deedee will say when
907
00:42:37,513 --> 00:42:39,223
she finds out about you two.
908
00:42:39,306 --> 00:42:44,561
[Sighs] I know
exactly what she'll say.
909
00:42:44,645 --> 00:42:46,146
(In little girl voice)
Oh, wow, you and me?
910
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:47,606
That's like neato mosquito.
911
00:42:53,279 --> 00:42:54,488
Come on.
912
00:42:54,571 --> 00:42:57,032
The two of me will explain
it to the two of you.
913
00:43:07,418 --> 00:43:08,502
Oh, Julie.
914
00:43:08,585 --> 00:43:09,295
[Door closes]
915
00:43:09,378 --> 00:43:11,588
Julie, wait.
916
00:43:11,672 --> 00:43:13,799
I'd like a chance to explain.
917
00:43:13,882 --> 00:43:15,175
What's to explain, Leonard?
918
00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:18,345
You're schizophrenic.
919
00:43:18,429 --> 00:43:21,265
I don't blame you for being
upset, but please hear me out.
920
00:43:21,348 --> 00:43:23,100
All right, I'm listening.
921
00:43:23,183 --> 00:43:26,520
You see, all my life, I've
had this trouble with girls.
922
00:43:26,603 --> 00:43:28,272
What kind of trouble?
923
00:43:28,355 --> 00:43:30,274
They can't stand me.
924
00:43:30,357 --> 00:43:31,900
High school, I had
to pay a girl $50
925
00:43:31,984 --> 00:43:33,819
just to go to my
senior prom with me.
926
00:43:33,902 --> 00:43:36,196
Our second date,
she charged me $75.
927
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:36,989
Leonard.
928
00:43:37,072 --> 00:43:38,282
It's all right.
929
00:43:38,365 --> 00:43:39,199
I'm used to it.
930
00:43:39,283 --> 00:43:42,328
Let's face it-- Robert
redford I ain't.
931
00:43:42,411 --> 00:43:44,455
But that's why I
acted the way I did.
932
00:43:44,538 --> 00:43:45,581
I don't understand.
933
00:43:45,664 --> 00:43:48,459
See, a while back,
I started noticing
934
00:43:48,542 --> 00:43:50,711
that women were more attracted
to men that they couldn't have.
935
00:43:50,794 --> 00:43:53,130
So when it seemed that
you didn't go for me,
936
00:43:53,213 --> 00:43:54,590
I figured the only way
to get you interested
937
00:43:54,673 --> 00:43:56,216
was to reject you.
938
00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:58,552
That way, I became
kind of a challenge.
939
00:43:58,635 --> 00:44:00,262
That's crazy.
940
00:44:00,346 --> 00:44:03,098
Got you to come down
to my cabin, didn't it?
941
00:44:03,182 --> 00:44:05,559
Then, my animal
instincts took over.
942
00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:06,977
Boy, I'm really sorry, Julie.
943
00:44:07,061 --> 00:44:09,104
You think you could
ever forgive me?
944
00:44:09,188 --> 00:44:10,230
I guess so.
945
00:44:10,314 --> 00:44:12,232
I just couldn't help myself.
946
00:44:12,316 --> 00:44:13,567
You looked so beautiful.
947
00:44:13,650 --> 00:44:16,820
Then you do find
me attractive.
948
00:44:16,904 --> 00:44:17,404
Do I?
949
00:44:17,488 --> 00:44:18,530
Aw, you knock me out.
950
00:44:18,614 --> 00:44:23,702
You come any
closer, and I will.
951
00:44:23,786 --> 00:44:23,994
[Chuckles]
952
00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:24,703
Ok.
953
00:44:40,344 --> 00:44:41,720
Hello?
954
00:44:41,804 --> 00:44:45,724
Ellen, I thought
you'd left the ship.
955
00:44:45,808 --> 00:44:48,394
No, I was thinking about
the plot for your new book,
956
00:44:48,477 --> 00:44:51,939
about the plagiarizing novelist.
957
00:44:52,022 --> 00:44:53,190
Uh, darling--
958
00:44:53,273 --> 00:44:57,778
I think the storyline would
be stronger if you stressed
959
00:44:57,861 --> 00:45:02,449
the reason why the novelist
plagiarized to begin with,
960
00:45:02,533 --> 00:45:06,745
because his overly ambitious
wife wasn't satisfied
961
00:45:06,829 --> 00:45:08,330
until her husband
was more successful
962
00:45:08,414 --> 00:45:10,165
than her sister's husband.
963
00:45:10,249 --> 00:45:12,876
Yes, that's possible.
964
00:45:16,547 --> 00:45:20,134
And what if the novelist
made his wife love him again
965
00:45:20,217 --> 00:45:23,804
by publicly confessing
the whole thing
966
00:45:23,887 --> 00:45:26,348
and returning the
literary prize?
967
00:45:26,432 --> 00:45:27,766
It wouldn't be easy.
968
00:45:29,810 --> 00:45:32,646
There would be a great
deal of humiliation
969
00:45:32,730 --> 00:45:34,481
for both characters.
970
00:45:34,565 --> 00:45:38,152
Ellen, it's a cliche but true.
971
00:45:38,235 --> 00:45:42,656
Two people can survive anything
if they really love each other.
972
00:45:42,739 --> 00:45:47,953
And besides, his wife
is the only prize
973
00:45:48,036 --> 00:45:49,788
the novelist really wanted.
974
00:46:13,103 --> 00:46:14,730
So long.
975
00:46:14,813 --> 00:46:15,814
Thank you for joining us.
976
00:46:15,898 --> 00:46:17,024
[Chatter]
977
00:46:17,107 --> 00:46:20,569
Ah, gopher, Isaac, thank
you so much for not telling
978
00:46:20,652 --> 00:46:21,820
the detective you found me.
979
00:46:21,904 --> 00:46:25,365
Ah, but we did right after
he called a few minutes ago
980
00:46:25,449 --> 00:46:26,867
to let us know that your
senator and his wife
981
00:46:26,950 --> 00:46:27,367
settled out of court.
- What?
982
00:46:27,451 --> 00:46:28,202
- Hey.
- Yes.
983
00:46:28,285 --> 00:46:29,995
Yes.
984
00:46:30,078 --> 00:46:30,871
So there's no one
looking for you.
985
00:46:30,954 --> 00:46:31,497
You're free as a breeze.
- Aw.
986
00:46:31,580 --> 00:46:33,081
I don't know.
987
00:46:33,165 --> 00:46:35,042
I have plans to limit Doris's
freedom for a long time.
988
00:46:35,125 --> 00:46:37,044
[Giggles]
989
00:46:37,127 --> 00:46:38,378
I'm probably the only
guy around who lost
990
00:46:38,462 --> 00:46:39,546
his girlfriend to his father.
991
00:46:39,630 --> 00:46:40,214
Outrageous.
992
00:46:40,297 --> 00:46:41,465
I call it totally awesome.
993
00:46:41,548 --> 00:46:43,550
- Yes.
- Bye-bye.
994
00:46:43,634 --> 00:46:44,718
Bye.
995
00:46:44,801 --> 00:46:45,719
So long.
996
00:46:45,802 --> 00:46:46,345
[Phone ringing]
997
00:46:46,428 --> 00:46:48,138
Goodbye, captain.
998
00:46:48,222 --> 00:46:49,223
Oh, goodbye, Mrs. Baker.
999
00:46:49,306 --> 00:46:50,557
Captain stubing, I
thought you might like
1000
00:46:50,641 --> 00:46:51,767
to have this copy of my book.
1001
00:46:51,850 --> 00:46:53,101
Why, thank you, Mr. Baker.
1002
00:46:53,185 --> 00:46:56,355
After the press conference
which I'm holding tomorrow,
1003
00:46:56,438 --> 00:46:57,940
it could be a collector's item.
1004
00:47:03,737 --> 00:47:05,572
When this is over,
Dan, your future
1005
00:47:05,656 --> 00:47:07,074
won't be worth two cents.
1006
00:47:07,157 --> 00:47:08,826
And don't expect
me to be around.
1007
00:47:08,909 --> 00:47:09,952
Oh, the future looks
brighter already.
1008
00:47:13,956 --> 00:47:15,207
Thanks a lot for
everything, Julie.
1009
00:47:15,290 --> 00:47:16,166
You sure there's
no hard feelings?
1010
00:47:16,250 --> 00:47:17,876
No, no.
1011
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:19,670
I actually kind of enjoyed it.
1012
00:47:19,753 --> 00:47:21,755
Really?
1013
00:47:21,838 --> 00:47:23,632
Don't answer that.
1014
00:47:23,715 --> 00:47:24,841
Oh, hi, doc.
1015
00:47:24,925 --> 00:47:25,592
Hi.
1016
00:47:25,676 --> 00:47:26,593
Good luck, Leonard.
1017
00:47:26,677 --> 00:47:27,636
Take care.
1018
00:47:27,719 --> 00:47:28,136
Yeah, bye.
1019
00:47:28,220 --> 00:47:31,223
Bye.
1020
00:47:31,306 --> 00:47:33,350
Uh, Julie do
you think it might
1021
00:47:33,433 --> 00:47:36,603
be possible for me to maybe get
something to remember you by?
1022
00:47:36,687 --> 00:47:37,604
Yeah, sure, Leonard.
1023
00:47:37,688 --> 00:47:39,189
What would you like?
1024
00:47:39,273 --> 00:47:40,274
How about a weekend in Vegas?
1025
00:47:40,357 --> 00:47:41,817
I know this great motel
that's got mirrors
1026
00:47:41,900 --> 00:47:43,193
on the ceiling, a fiber film--
1027
00:47:53,287 --> 00:47:56,498
[Theme music playing]
70769
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