Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
3
00:00:11,402 --> 00:00:13,665
Ladies and gentlemen,
my name is Seth,
4
00:00:13,796 --> 00:00:15,841
and I am a cartoonist.
5
00:00:15,972 --> 00:00:17,669
There is something very lovely
6
00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:20,368
about the stillness
of a comic-book page,
7
00:00:20,498 --> 00:00:22,457
that austere
stacked grid of boxes,
8
00:00:22,587 --> 00:00:25,242
the little people
trapped in time.
9
00:00:25,373 --> 00:00:28,115
I actually think
it is better suited
10
00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:31,292
for portraying the interior life
of a person
11
00:00:31,422 --> 00:00:34,904
than the sort of big,
blown world of fantasy.
12
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:37,646
I've been asked by the NFB
to repeat questions
13
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:41,128
as they're asked to me,
to phrase them as a statement.
14
00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:57,144
It may sound
like a ridiculous statement,
15
00:00:57,274 --> 00:00:59,624
but in some ways
cartooning is much like
16
00:00:59,755 --> 00:01:01,148
what the Impressionists
were doing,
17
00:01:01,278 --> 00:01:03,672
in that you're not aiming
for the detail
18
00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:07,371
so much as the overall feeling.
19
00:01:28,131 --> 00:01:30,655
Cartooning to me
isn't about drawing at all;
20
00:01:30,786 --> 00:01:33,223
it's about graphic design,
it's about...
21
00:01:33,354 --> 00:01:36,487
creating iconic images
you move around on the page,
22
00:01:36,618 --> 00:01:39,708
which actually stimulate in
the reader their own experience.
23
00:01:39,838 --> 00:01:42,319
They're like memory drawings,
I call them.
24
00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:44,539
But that simple iconic drawing
25
00:01:44,669 --> 00:01:47,890
operates in many ways
like language does.
26
00:01:48,020 --> 00:01:50,545
I can't draw the texture
of the natural world.
27
00:01:50,675 --> 00:01:54,592
I can create a house and you can
add the boards on it yourself,
28
00:01:54,723 --> 00:01:56,246
the way it really is.
29
00:01:56,377 --> 00:01:58,814
I think something
about that process of recreating
30
00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:01,817
the world in your mind
through these memory drawings
31
00:02:01,947 --> 00:02:04,167
is what brings in
the real world.
32
00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:07,170
In the last few years,
I did autobiographical stories
33
00:02:07,301 --> 00:02:08,954
in my sketchbook.
34
00:02:09,085 --> 00:02:11,957
I have to come up with
an expedient method to do it.
35
00:02:12,088 --> 00:02:13,742
And the simple answer
seemed to me...
36
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:15,787
I actually I think it came to me
37
00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:18,181
while I was having a phone call
with another cartoonist,
38
00:02:18,312 --> 00:02:19,922
and he was talking
about the difficulty
39
00:02:20,052 --> 00:02:22,359
of trying to write a diary
and I said jokingly,
40
00:02:22,490 --> 00:02:25,057
"You should just get
some rubber stamps and do it."
41
00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:26,711
And then I thought,
I said immediately:
42
00:02:26,842 --> 00:02:29,149
"Actually don't do that;
I'm going to do that."
43
00:02:29,279 --> 00:02:34,632
Um... I have, like,
a stamp of myself at my desk,
44
00:02:34,763 --> 00:02:37,026
I have one of walking.
45
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:40,508
Just what is memory?
I pondered.
46
00:02:41,944 --> 00:02:43,641
It's an odd thing.
47
00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:45,382
Not a factual record.
48
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:48,864
It is a flash
of captured experience.
49
00:02:48,994 --> 00:02:50,996
Think of somewhere in a memory.
50
00:02:51,127 --> 00:02:54,609
You don't see the place
so much as feel it.
51
00:02:54,739 --> 00:02:58,221
You can't look around and
itemize what was in the room,
52
00:02:58,352 --> 00:03:00,615
but you sense
the details around you.
53
00:03:00,745 --> 00:03:04,401
You feel the proximity
of people and objects about you.
54
00:03:04,532 --> 00:03:07,839
It's almost
a textural experience.
55
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:12,540
A memory is like a photograph
of a sensation.
56
00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:15,238
October 11, 2005.
57
00:03:16,718 --> 00:03:19,024
Left the house today.
Errands.
58
00:03:19,155 --> 00:03:22,550
Wine, bakery
and the Italian market.
59
00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:25,683
Walking is the best time
to reflect.
60
00:03:26,815 --> 00:03:29,557
Saw an old woman
sitting on a bench.
61
00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:32,908
Just an old woman
like any other.
62
00:03:33,038 --> 00:03:35,737
A little feeble,
a little addled.
63
00:03:35,867 --> 00:03:39,349
It occurred to me that when
Mother had been out shopping,
64
00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:42,091
this is probably
how she looked to others.
65
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:47,096
My beloved mother,
just another doddering old lady.
66
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:51,013
The thought of this caused
such a sudden rush of emotion
67
00:03:51,143 --> 00:03:54,016
that tears almost popped out
of my eyes.
68
00:03:56,192 --> 00:04:00,588
I don't know how he does this,
but he... he somehow, you know,
69
00:04:00,718 --> 00:04:04,809
made a day into, you know,
35 hours instead of 24 hours.
70
00:04:04,940 --> 00:04:06,942
And not only has he become
71
00:04:07,072 --> 00:04:08,770
extremely prolific
as a cartoonist,
72
00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:12,295
but aside from doing
all this work he's known for,
73
00:04:12,426 --> 00:04:14,079
so well known for,
74
00:04:14,210 --> 00:04:16,299
I mean, he has
all these other side projects,
75
00:04:16,430 --> 00:04:18,301
and none of us
can figure it out,
76
00:04:18,432 --> 00:04:20,216
how he gets any of this done.
77
00:04:20,347 --> 00:04:22,740
His progression over the years
has been fantastic,
78
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:25,047
and his dedication
to his art form
79
00:04:25,177 --> 00:04:26,701
is amazing as well.
80
00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:30,835
I mean, he's the type of guy
that can easily...
81
00:04:30,966 --> 00:04:33,273
have given up comics years ago,
82
00:04:33,403 --> 00:04:35,187
in favour
of an illustration career,
83
00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:37,625
or a fine-art career,
for that matter.
84
00:04:37,755 --> 00:04:39,888
The generation of cartoonists
I was working with
85
00:04:40,018 --> 00:04:42,412
were coming out of...
were benefiting from the work
86
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:44,284
the underground cartoonists
had done before us.
87
00:04:44,414 --> 00:04:47,635
They'd opened the door to the
idea that comics could be art.
88
00:04:47,765 --> 00:04:51,552
My focus has always been
on just doing the comics,
89
00:04:51,682 --> 00:04:53,510
panel-to-panel,
90
00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:56,948
whereas he...
he would be doing paintings,
91
00:04:57,079 --> 00:05:00,822
and then he would want to create
the frame for the painting
92
00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:02,519
and he would be doing...
93
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,478
these little handcrafted boxes.
94
00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:07,611
And it would all be gorgeous.
95
00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,134
And I'd be, like, "Yeah,
96
00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:11,136
why don't I want to do
this sort of stuff?"
97
00:05:11,267 --> 00:05:14,052
Our melodrama tonight,
ladies and gentlemen,
98
00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:17,447
is entitled,
The Apology of Albert Batch.
99
00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:21,190
This evening, his life
comes to its conclusion.
100
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:23,148
As an artist,
you should have work
101
00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:24,759
that isn't just to be published,
102
00:05:24,889 --> 00:05:27,370
and that's why I have
all these little hobbies.
103
00:05:27,501 --> 00:05:29,154
Why I have
my rubber-stamp diary,
104
00:05:29,285 --> 00:05:32,549
my sketchbook,
the City of Dominion.
105
00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,378
It's very different
than working on a comic page
106
00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:37,859
where you know
the minute you start it
107
00:05:37,989 --> 00:05:39,730
that you're planning
to publish it.
108
00:05:39,861 --> 00:05:41,384
That's a straightforward
artistic goal
109
00:05:41,515 --> 00:05:43,604
of trying to communicate
with another person.
110
00:05:43,734 --> 00:05:46,998
There's something
really valuable about doing art
111
00:05:47,129 --> 00:05:49,653
that's just for yourself.
112
00:05:54,745 --> 00:05:57,661
I suspect many people
have had a place like this
113
00:05:57,792 --> 00:05:59,402
in their childhood,
114
00:05:59,533 --> 00:06:02,405
a place where they encountered
the natural world
115
00:06:02,536 --> 00:06:05,147
without the watchful eye
of an adult,
116
00:06:05,277 --> 00:06:08,585
a place that remains unnaturally
vivid in the imagination.
117
00:06:08,716 --> 00:06:11,371
The creek was within
easy walking distance,
118
00:06:11,501 --> 00:06:15,375
just beyond a new subdivision,
on the edge of town.
119
00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:19,944
A wild area of little streams
in the shadow of the bush.
120
00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:23,818
Over a fence
and into a grassy field,
121
00:06:23,948 --> 00:06:27,735
and in that field a pond,
simply brimming with life.
122
00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:30,955
Dragonflies,
123
00:06:31,086 --> 00:06:32,827
painted turtles,
124
00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:34,872
water striders,
125
00:06:35,003 --> 00:06:36,526
whirligig beetles
126
00:06:36,657 --> 00:06:39,007
and, of course, frogs.
127
00:06:41,096 --> 00:06:43,794
Frogs in all stages
of their lives.
128
00:06:44,795 --> 00:06:46,667
Always so startling to see them
129
00:06:46,797 --> 00:06:49,496
on the threshold
of being that final creature.
130
00:06:56,807 --> 00:07:00,855
In the field, the milkweed,
the cattail and wheatgrass,
131
00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:04,249
Queen Anne's lace,
the skunk cabbage.
132
00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:07,992
And in the bush, the trillium.
133
00:07:10,386 --> 00:07:12,823
The trillium
held a special fascination.
134
00:07:12,954 --> 00:07:17,001
Being the provincial flower,
we were forbidden to pick it.
135
00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:21,571
Schoolyard lore warned
that if a trillium was picked...
136
00:07:23,051 --> 00:07:24,792
...it would bleed red blood.
137
00:07:26,097 --> 00:07:28,578
I promised never to touch one.
138
00:07:30,624 --> 00:07:34,279
I purchased an old postcard
of Strathroy, Ontario,
139
00:07:34,410 --> 00:07:36,673
postmarked 1909.
140
00:07:36,804 --> 00:07:39,023
The old swimming hole.
141
00:07:41,069 --> 00:07:42,897
Was this the same spot?
142
00:07:43,027 --> 00:07:46,466
Had we inherited it,
and its name?
143
00:07:46,596 --> 00:07:49,164
Was I just one
of a long line of boys
144
00:07:49,294 --> 00:07:50,905
who played and swam there?
145
00:07:58,390 --> 00:08:00,480
I remember how unpleasant
the creek bottom felt,
146
00:08:00,610 --> 00:08:02,177
with just bare feet.
147
00:08:02,307 --> 00:08:04,179
The mud and the reeds,
148
00:08:04,309 --> 00:08:07,051
and the crayfish
skittering between your legs.
149
00:08:07,182 --> 00:08:09,314
I remember how it felt
to be there
150
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:11,055
when you were in a group,
151
00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:14,058
and how different it felt
to be there alone.
152
00:08:17,453 --> 00:08:20,500
When I returned as an adult
in the 1990s,
153
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:23,154
the creek was unchanged.
154
00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:25,461
It was eerily familiar.
155
00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:29,378
However,
156
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:32,337
when last I visited,
the bush had grown so thick,
157
00:08:32,468 --> 00:08:34,644
I couldn't even get near.
158
00:08:35,863 --> 00:08:38,256
Shit!
159
00:08:39,954 --> 00:08:42,217
One of the great things about
being able to do a comic book
160
00:08:42,347 --> 00:08:44,654
anyway you wanted it
is that you could tell the story
161
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:47,135
as slow as you liked
and as long as you liked.
162
00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:48,919
I wanted to capture
some of the qualities
163
00:08:49,050 --> 00:08:50,965
you would have in a reverie,
and for that,
164
00:08:51,095 --> 00:08:52,880
you really need
to have a slow pace.
165
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:06,328
Somewhere on the Prairies,
at the edge of a little town,
166
00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,896
there is a closed-up
drive-in theatre.
167
00:09:09,940 --> 00:09:11,899
Closed 10 years.
168
00:09:13,335 --> 00:09:14,989
Next to that drive-in,
169
00:09:15,119 --> 00:09:18,209
you'll find a rusted-out
kiddie carousel
170
00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:21,517
that no child has touched
since 1973.
171
00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:26,348
And on the shores of Lake Huron,
there is a cottage.
172
00:09:26,478 --> 00:09:29,830
And in that cottage,
there is a backroom.
173
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:35,009
And in that backroom,
there is an old cardboard box,
174
00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:39,796
filled with road maps,
insurance folders,
175
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:43,104
appliance pamphlets,
mimeographed recipes,
176
00:09:43,234 --> 00:09:45,410
and black-and-white snapshots.
177
00:09:45,541 --> 00:09:49,719
A box that has remained
unopened in 35 years.
178
00:09:49,850 --> 00:09:51,808
Further on,
179
00:09:51,939 --> 00:09:54,071
down a gravel road
near Algonquin,
180
00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:56,378
stands the nailed-up
information booth
181
00:09:56,508 --> 00:09:59,816
of an out-of-business
tourist camp.
182
00:09:59,947 --> 00:10:02,384
Inside, under its main counter,
183
00:10:02,514 --> 00:10:05,430
is a dusty book,
opened to page 126.
184
00:10:05,561 --> 00:10:10,044
This is where it has sat
since the door closed for good,
185
00:10:10,174 --> 00:10:14,570
since it was absent-mindedly
left behind, half read.
186
00:10:24,841 --> 00:10:28,410
In these places
and others like them...
187
00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:31,282
...time is standing still.
188
00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:42,337
Nostalgia implies...
189
00:10:42,467 --> 00:10:45,645
a kind
of Hallmark-card sentiment
190
00:10:45,775 --> 00:10:48,735
that there is a golden past
that you're yearning for.
191
00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:51,259
And there's lots of yearning
in my work,
192
00:10:51,389 --> 00:10:55,089
but I don't think of it
as being that kind of nostalgia.
193
00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:57,482
In fact, I always think
the stories I'm writing
194
00:10:57,613 --> 00:10:59,223
to flatter myself
are more complicated
195
00:10:59,354 --> 00:11:01,182
about the past
and that my characters...
196
00:11:01,312 --> 00:11:04,054
I'm not presenting people
who lived in some golden past.
197
00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:07,492
I tend to like to write about
people whose lives have been...
198
00:11:07,623 --> 00:11:09,103
there's some complexity
199
00:11:09,233 --> 00:11:12,410
about whether or not
their life was a success or not.
200
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:16,327
Albert Batch was a well-known
Canadian cartoonist
201
00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:17,851
from the 20th century.
202
00:11:17,981 --> 00:11:20,462
Trout Haven was quite
a gentle comic strip,
203
00:11:20,592 --> 00:11:22,507
a sort of bucolic, actually,
204
00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:25,641
all about the little events
in a small village.
205
00:11:25,772 --> 00:11:28,688
He had 10 collections
of his famous comic strip
206
00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:31,516
published during his lifetime.
They were published
207
00:11:31,647 --> 00:11:33,823
by the Narwhal Press
of Dominion, Ontario.
208
00:11:33,954 --> 00:11:36,652
They sold very well.
209
00:11:55,279 --> 00:11:58,326
"Graphic novel" -
what a horrible term.
210
00:11:58,456 --> 00:12:01,721
A misshapen thing stitched
together from two words,
211
00:12:01,851 --> 00:12:04,332
which I must assume
are considered
212
00:12:04,462 --> 00:12:07,814
more respectable-sounding
than comic and book combined.
213
00:12:07,944 --> 00:12:09,903
People recognize the phrase
"graphic novel,"
214
00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:12,601
and I now find myself saying it
in interviews,
215
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:16,170
simply because it is easier
to use than to try and institute
216
00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:18,346
some new name
of my own invention.
217
00:12:18,476 --> 00:12:19,956
That's hard work,
218
00:12:20,087 --> 00:12:22,393
to rename something
and make it stick.
219
00:12:22,524 --> 00:12:24,395
I did that once, years ago,
220
00:12:24,526 --> 00:12:27,572
when I changed my name
from Gregory Gallant to Seth.
221
00:12:27,703 --> 00:12:29,400
That was a big chore.
222
00:12:29,531 --> 00:12:33,404
First, introducing the new name
and then enforcing its use.
223
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:34,928
Correcting friends or family
224
00:12:35,058 --> 00:12:37,800
every time
they used the old name.
225
00:12:37,931 --> 00:12:39,802
Reinforcing it constantly,
226
00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:42,457
until it became second nature
for everyone.
227
00:12:42,587 --> 00:12:44,807
That's a young man's game.
228
00:12:44,938 --> 00:12:47,897
I don't have the stomach
for that sort
229
00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:50,160
of highly disciplined assholism
any longer.
230
00:12:52,032 --> 00:12:54,686
And that was kind
of the process of being involved
231
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:56,906
in the punk scene
in the early '80s
232
00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:58,952
and looking for a pretentious,
scary name,
233
00:12:59,082 --> 00:13:00,910
and so that's why I picked Seth.
234
00:13:01,041 --> 00:13:04,000
I had a last name then, too,
which I'll never tell.
235
00:13:04,131 --> 00:13:05,915
Aw...
Oh, no.
236
00:13:06,046 --> 00:13:09,049
I'd show you my tattoo
before I'd tell you that.
237
00:13:24,151 --> 00:13:26,327
They're sleeping
in their usual spots.
238
00:13:26,457 --> 00:13:28,372
- That's good.
- Beautiful.
239
00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,637
Thank you, darlin'.
No problem.
240
00:13:32,768 --> 00:13:35,249
You always look so good
when you're done.
241
00:13:35,379 --> 00:13:36,772
Thank you.
242
00:13:43,387 --> 00:13:45,868
I like routine.
243
00:13:45,999 --> 00:13:47,652
And...
244
00:13:47,783 --> 00:13:50,351
my days are pretty structured.
245
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:55,008
I get up early in the morning,
'cause my wife Tanya's a barber.
246
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:56,879
And when she goes off to work,
247
00:13:57,010 --> 00:13:58,750
I generally come down
to the studio.
248
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:01,623
I begin with some work
I've left from the night before.
249
00:14:01,753 --> 00:14:03,059
The rest of the morning,
250
00:14:03,190 --> 00:14:05,801
I like to work
on one of my private projects.
251
00:14:05,932 --> 00:14:08,456
Time to eat. Time to read.
252
00:14:08,586 --> 00:14:11,154
If there's any commercial work
to be done at that point,
253
00:14:11,285 --> 00:14:12,939
any specific jobs
that have a deadline,
254
00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:15,550
usually I work on that
in the afternoon.
255
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:19,554
Dealing with the daily problems
of business, checking the email,
256
00:14:19,684 --> 00:14:21,512
making phone calls.
Make dinner.
257
00:14:21,643 --> 00:14:23,645
Tanya arrives home,
we have dinner,
258
00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:27,127
spend some time together,
have a glass of wine, relax.
259
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:29,564
Being a 50-year-old man,
I go and take a nap.
260
00:14:29,694 --> 00:14:32,654
The evening: best time for
working on the comics, I find.
261
00:14:32,784 --> 00:14:34,874
I'll work
till about 11:00 at night.
262
00:14:35,004 --> 00:14:38,529
If it's a little busier,
I might work till 11:30 or 12.
263
00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:41,054
And then I come upstairs
and Tanya and I...
264
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:42,707
will usually sit down,
265
00:14:42,838 --> 00:14:44,709
I'll drink a couple of glasses
of wine,
266
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,929
we'll watch a movie;
and then it's reading time,
267
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:50,193
and then to bed by 1:00.
Actually, 1:30. Always 1:30.
268
00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,065
Next day,
exactly the same thing.
269
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:56,939
I'm a pretty extroverted person,
but... and I think probably
270
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:58,462
you're more naturally
introverted
271
00:14:58,593 --> 00:15:00,943
and yet you've got the career
with people
272
00:15:01,074 --> 00:15:03,424
and I've got the career
where I'm alone.
273
00:15:03,554 --> 00:15:05,905
But it works good for us
that way.
274
00:15:06,035 --> 00:15:09,125
You have that interior world
that you let me peek into,
275
00:15:09,256 --> 00:15:11,823
once in a while,
and I find that fascinating.
276
00:15:11,954 --> 00:15:13,825
That's why I like
to leave him alone.
277
00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:16,567
There's some Protestant work
ethic in the back of my brain
278
00:15:16,698 --> 00:15:18,613
that makes me feel good
when I work.
279
00:15:18,743 --> 00:15:21,529
Like if I have a day
where I get five things done -
280
00:15:21,659 --> 00:15:23,487
work in my sketchbook,
281
00:15:23,618 --> 00:15:25,272
do my diary,
282
00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:27,535
get part of some commercial job,
283
00:15:27,665 --> 00:15:30,581
work on my comic
and one of my little buildings -
284
00:15:30,712 --> 00:15:31,931
a day like that,
285
00:15:32,061 --> 00:15:33,933
there is such a good feeling
to that.
286
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:36,370
You want that feeling
when you go to bed
287
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,285
that you've accomplished
something.
288
00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:42,724
You know, when I wanted to
be a cartoonist in my twenties,
289
00:15:42,854 --> 00:15:44,421
I thought it would be cool.
290
00:15:44,552 --> 00:15:47,468
What I wasn't thinking
was crafting a life for myself
291
00:15:47,598 --> 00:15:51,428
where I'd spend all my time
alone as a 50-year-old man
292
00:15:51,559 --> 00:15:54,301
in the basement,
but that's where it ended up,
293
00:15:54,431 --> 00:15:56,129
and that is where I'm happiest.
294
00:15:56,259 --> 00:15:58,740
I like that feeling of being
by myself most of the time,
295
00:15:58,870 --> 00:16:02,309
but the comfortable feeling
of being by myself,
296
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:05,051
where loneliness
is removed by Tanya.
297
00:16:06,748 --> 00:16:09,316
Hearing Tanya laughing upstairs
when I'm working.
298
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,931
Not knowing
what she's laughing about.
299
00:16:18,281 --> 00:16:21,197
I know she wouldn't be insulted,
because we've talked about it,
300
00:16:21,328 --> 00:16:24,287
but it's the same feeling
I had with my own mother,
301
00:16:24,418 --> 00:16:27,160
when I was in my room,
working away,
302
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:28,988
hearing her in the other part
of the house.
303
00:16:29,118 --> 00:16:32,382
This supplied some need to me
that removed loneliness.
304
00:16:32,513 --> 00:16:35,559
This is a book I put together
a few years ago.
305
00:16:35,690 --> 00:16:39,085
It's titled The History
of the Cosmic Comics Company,
306
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:42,218
which is kind of
a deliberately grand title
307
00:16:42,349 --> 00:16:44,438
for what it really is
just a collection
308
00:16:44,568 --> 00:16:48,007
of what survives of the strips
I drew when I was a child.
309
00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:55,231
One of the great powers
of comics when you're a child
310
00:16:55,362 --> 00:16:58,626
is that there is a range
of intense emotions
311
00:16:58,756 --> 00:17:00,889
you can have from reading these,
312
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,848
from the genuine excitement
of genre pulp adventure -
313
00:17:03,979 --> 00:17:06,068
people fighting each other,
of course -
314
00:17:06,199 --> 00:17:08,114
but also these feelings
315
00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:10,768
of coming to deeper
understanding of life.
316
00:17:10,899 --> 00:17:12,509
When you see
like Superman facing death,
317
00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:14,294
and you're a little kid,
318
00:17:14,424 --> 00:17:17,688
it's like a kind of childish
profundity that you relate to.
319
00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:21,344
And so when I made up
the Kao-Kuk Story,
320
00:17:21,475 --> 00:17:24,391
I wanted it to have
that same quality.
321
00:17:27,002 --> 00:17:31,050
I drew many, many hundreds
of pages of comic books,
322
00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,877
maybe 1,000 pages
of comic books,
323
00:17:33,008 --> 00:17:36,316
from when I was a little kid
until I went to art school.
324
00:17:36,446 --> 00:17:39,058
And I never showed them.
Maybe once or twice,
325
00:17:39,188 --> 00:17:40,929
showed something
to some other kids.
326
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,671
It was a private little world,
and Mother, really,
327
00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:46,152
was the main person
I showed anything to.
328
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:48,371
And her support
was really very important.
329
00:17:54,421 --> 00:17:55,944
Coming home
from kindergarten,
330
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:59,295
I stand for a moment
in the driveway.
331
00:17:59,426 --> 00:18:03,604
I wet my cheeks with spit
and dash in the house,
332
00:18:03,734 --> 00:18:06,128
pretending to cry.
Mom!!!
333
00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:09,827
An act contrived purely
to get affection from mother.
334
00:18:09,958 --> 00:18:12,743
Mom! They were mean to me.
335
00:18:12,874 --> 00:18:15,790
Was I that starved for love?
336
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:17,879
Oh, you poor thing.
337
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:19,533
I guess I was.
338
00:18:19,663 --> 00:18:21,752
Let's get you a cup of tea.
339
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:23,363
Looking back,
340
00:18:23,493 --> 00:18:26,366
I can't recall
ever being held as a child.
341
00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:28,368
Thanks, Mom!
342
00:18:28,498 --> 00:18:30,718
And foolishly,
it was around this time
343
00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:32,763
when I stopped
kissing Mother goodnight.
344
00:18:32,894 --> 00:18:34,243
Night-night.
345
00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,768
I had decided I was a big boy.
346
00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:40,902
And a good-night kiss
was for babies.
347
00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:47,387
I didn't regret my decision
immediately, but in time,
348
00:18:47,517 --> 00:18:50,607
I saw it
as an irreversible mistake.
349
00:18:50,738 --> 00:18:54,220
I longed to kiss her again,
but couldn't go back on it.
350
00:18:56,047 --> 00:18:57,919
Mom, I'm bored.
351
00:18:58,049 --> 00:19:00,095
Go do your drawings.
352
00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:04,317
I never stopped regretting it.
353
00:19:05,318 --> 00:19:07,015
Right into my teens,
354
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,931
I would daily resolve
to kiss her.
355
00:19:10,061 --> 00:19:12,934
Tomorrow... for sure.
356
00:19:15,066 --> 00:19:16,590
But I never did.
357
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:20,159
In fact, I didn't kiss her again
until I was a grown man.
358
00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:22,509
I'm heading home now,
Mother.
359
00:19:30,778 --> 00:19:32,606
I always think of memory
as being...
360
00:19:32,736 --> 00:19:34,912
it's like a blueprint
of a sensation, somehow,
361
00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:36,653
that you have in your brain.
362
00:19:36,784 --> 00:19:38,612
And this blueprint
has to be studied
363
00:19:38,742 --> 00:19:40,962
when you go back
to look at it.
364
00:19:41,092 --> 00:19:42,833
And much like composing
a panel,
365
00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:45,967
it's like you're in the centre
of that blueprint, the memory,
366
00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:48,187
and you go, "Here I am,
I'm 8 years old,
367
00:19:48,317 --> 00:19:50,014
I'm in the backyard."
368
00:19:50,145 --> 00:19:52,452
The brick of the house
is over here.
369
00:19:52,582 --> 00:19:55,585
Or you start to build
the memory in your brain,
370
00:19:55,716 --> 00:19:58,675
much the way you might
move around little toy figures,
371
00:19:58,806 --> 00:20:00,242
or something, in a diorama.
372
00:20:06,335 --> 00:20:08,032
For a time,
373
00:20:08,163 --> 00:20:11,210
we lived in a small house
on Milner Street.
374
00:20:11,340 --> 00:20:13,690
In my tiny bedroom,
on top of a dresser,
375
00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:15,692
I kept my stuffed animals.
376
00:20:15,823 --> 00:20:17,781
My best-loved toys.
377
00:20:19,087 --> 00:20:22,046
A bland assortment
of cheap stuffed animals,
378
00:20:22,177 --> 00:20:24,135
haphazardly acquired.
379
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:27,182
At least two of them
carnival prizes.
380
00:20:29,097 --> 00:20:32,405
Their faces remembered better
than any childhood friend,
381
00:20:32,535 --> 00:20:35,799
recalled clearer
than any teacher from that time.
382
00:20:38,193 --> 00:20:41,805
Several years later,
I had a large dresser.
383
00:20:41,936 --> 00:20:45,722
I kept one drawer for models
which had fallen from favour.
384
00:20:45,853 --> 00:20:48,334
They'd be demoted
from shelf to drawer.
385
00:20:48,464 --> 00:20:51,075
Each time I opened
or closed the drawer,
386
00:20:51,206 --> 00:20:53,077
something would break.
387
00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:54,992
The damage only got worse
388
00:20:55,123 --> 00:20:58,213
as I crammed
more and more models in there.
389
00:20:58,344 --> 00:21:00,824
Eventually,
the drawer was filled
390
00:21:00,955 --> 00:21:03,436
only with small,
shattered pieces.
391
00:21:10,312 --> 00:21:12,923
My father grew up
in the Depression,
392
00:21:13,054 --> 00:21:14,403
in Prince-Edward Island,
393
00:21:14,534 --> 00:21:17,101
and he'd always told me
the stories,
394
00:21:17,232 --> 00:21:20,061
when I was a child,
about his childhood.
395
00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:25,501
I thought of them
as good stories,
396
00:21:25,632 --> 00:21:28,330
stories I liked to listen to,
even though they were stories
397
00:21:28,461 --> 00:21:30,941
about being poor
and having to steal food,
398
00:21:31,072 --> 00:21:32,291
and parental neglect.
399
00:21:32,421 --> 00:21:35,859
I wanted to record them
somehow.
400
00:21:35,990 --> 00:21:38,427
So I just asked him
to write them down.
401
00:21:40,124 --> 00:21:42,475
Sometimes it's funny,
402
00:21:42,605 --> 00:21:45,608
I'll look back at photographs
of places we went together
403
00:21:45,739 --> 00:21:47,306
where I would snap pictures.
404
00:21:47,436 --> 00:21:51,135
They're the same kind of places
I would go to now.
405
00:21:51,266 --> 00:21:55,096
And these things are still
imprinted in my brain somehow.
406
00:22:05,106 --> 00:22:08,152
In Grade 5,
we moved to Elmwood Street,
407
00:22:08,283 --> 00:22:11,417
though we lived there
only about a year.
408
00:22:13,288 --> 00:22:16,378
The scene of so many terrible
fights between my parents.
409
00:22:16,509 --> 00:22:20,948
They were always fighting,
or I should say he was.
410
00:22:21,078 --> 00:22:25,605
Mother and I were terrorized
by my father's temper.
411
00:22:27,171 --> 00:22:30,174
It's strange how horrible
the sound of an adult's anger
412
00:22:30,305 --> 00:22:32,046
is to a child.
413
00:22:32,176 --> 00:22:34,527
I often tried to block it out.
414
00:22:34,657 --> 00:22:36,529
At night, if he were shouting,
415
00:22:36,659 --> 00:22:38,661
I would play
my transistor radio.
416
00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:41,185
An earphone in one ear,
417
00:22:41,316 --> 00:22:43,492
and a finger in the other.
418
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:47,583
It never worked.
419
00:22:47,714 --> 00:22:51,326
That sort of thing
just can't be ignored.
420
00:22:57,158 --> 00:22:58,812
I think I was brought up
421
00:22:58,942 --> 00:23:01,771
with that feeling of fear
of his temper,
422
00:23:01,902 --> 00:23:04,078
which was the temper
of a frustrated person,
423
00:23:04,208 --> 00:23:06,385
who felt they'd missed out
on certain opportunities.
424
00:23:06,515 --> 00:23:10,476
He never felt he got to do
what he wanted to do in life.
425
00:23:10,606 --> 00:23:12,608
I think he was always
kind of hoping
426
00:23:12,739 --> 00:23:15,045
something would happen.
I don't know what it was.
427
00:23:15,176 --> 00:23:16,656
When I think of Seth,
428
00:23:16,786 --> 00:23:19,920
sometimes I think
of Marcel Proust.
429
00:23:20,050 --> 00:23:22,139
A dozen memories of childhood,
430
00:23:22,270 --> 00:23:24,707
and you go over them
in your mind so much,
431
00:23:24,838 --> 00:23:26,796
covet them so much,
that you polish them.
432
00:23:26,927 --> 00:23:28,319
Well, memory is funny, too.
433
00:23:28,450 --> 00:23:30,147
Who knows
why you remember anything?
434
00:23:30,278 --> 00:23:33,716
Things take on significance
as times goes on.
435
00:23:33,847 --> 00:23:37,677
I sometimes wonder, like,
how much control you even have
436
00:23:37,807 --> 00:23:41,028
over what you pick
to remember as significant.
437
00:23:49,776 --> 00:23:53,214
One bright day,
I went up to the attic.
438
00:23:54,781 --> 00:23:58,306
I gathered up my beloved
stuffed toys from Milner Street,
439
00:23:58,437 --> 00:24:02,005
I carried them out
into the backyard
440
00:24:02,136 --> 00:24:05,400
and carefully hung them,
one by one, from a tree.
441
00:24:10,187 --> 00:24:12,494
I went back inside
442
00:24:12,625 --> 00:24:14,583
and got my pellet gun.
443
00:24:19,022 --> 00:24:21,938
I laid down,
I carefully took aim,
444
00:24:22,069 --> 00:24:24,593
and shot them all to pieces.
445
00:24:28,815 --> 00:24:31,382
I felt nothing special
in doing it.
446
00:24:31,513 --> 00:24:36,039
It wasn't a meaningful act,
just something to pass the time.
447
00:24:36,170 --> 00:24:39,042
But looking back,
448
00:24:39,173 --> 00:24:42,176
I can think
of no more fitting event
449
00:24:42,306 --> 00:24:44,613
to signify the end of childhood.
450
00:24:44,744 --> 00:24:46,528
I was not a happy teenager,
451
00:24:46,659 --> 00:24:50,532
and when I came from
the little town to the big city,
452
00:24:50,663 --> 00:24:53,579
this was my opportunity
to become a new person.
453
00:24:53,709 --> 00:24:56,277
It took me
about a year and a half maybe
454
00:24:56,407 --> 00:24:58,453
to reach the point
where Seth was born.
455
00:24:58,584 --> 00:25:00,890
If you do anything long enough,
it becomes real.
456
00:25:01,021 --> 00:25:03,502
I mean, good advice is:
Be the person you want to be,
457
00:25:03,632 --> 00:25:05,895
because you'll start out faking,
458
00:25:06,026 --> 00:25:08,855
but eventually
you'll be that person.
459
00:25:14,469 --> 00:25:17,951
On Tuesday night,
I went for a late-night stroll.
460
00:25:18,081 --> 00:25:21,345
It was a beautiful night.
A bit of a chill in the air.
461
00:25:21,476 --> 00:25:24,174
Not really cold, though.
462
00:25:24,305 --> 00:25:27,482
Still, winter was coming.
463
00:25:33,096 --> 00:25:35,359
Believe it or not,
in this small town,
464
00:25:35,490 --> 00:25:38,537
I could actually see the stars.
465
00:25:40,539 --> 00:25:43,890
I walked down London Street,
lost in thought.
466
00:25:45,369 --> 00:25:47,763
My mind was fixated on a girl
467
00:25:47,894 --> 00:25:50,374
I was disastrously pursuing
in another city.
468
00:25:55,510 --> 00:25:58,992
I stopped for a moment,
and as I stood there,
469
00:25:59,122 --> 00:26:01,560
I heard an almost imperceptible,
tinny sound.
470
00:26:01,690 --> 00:26:04,214
It was music.
471
00:26:04,345 --> 00:26:06,782
I recognized the song.
472
00:26:06,913 --> 00:26:09,089
I quickly realized
that it was coming
473
00:26:09,219 --> 00:26:11,395
from a garbage bag on the curb.
474
00:26:11,526 --> 00:26:13,397
Someone had obviously thrown out
475
00:26:13,528 --> 00:26:16,531
one of these cards
with a computer chip in it.
476
00:26:20,753 --> 00:26:23,233
Alone, in the darkness,
477
00:26:23,364 --> 00:26:25,888
this seemed deeply funny.
478
00:26:26,019 --> 00:26:28,151
And profoundly sad.
479
00:26:31,459 --> 00:26:34,549
His personal approach
to his work,
480
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:37,030
and taking everything
he does so seriously,
481
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,162
although with a sense of humour,
482
00:26:39,293 --> 00:26:42,165
it definitely made me think
of my work in a different way.
483
00:26:44,298 --> 00:26:46,953
I was a big fan
of Chester's comic books...
484
00:26:47,083 --> 00:26:48,781
when I was living in Montreal.
485
00:26:48,911 --> 00:26:50,652
Seth was always with Chester.
486
00:26:50,783 --> 00:26:54,090
The minute the three of us
started hanging around,
487
00:26:54,221 --> 00:26:55,483
the friendship worked,
488
00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:57,398
and we all spoke
the same language.
489
00:26:57,528 --> 00:26:59,182
- Take it, Chet.
- That's mine?
490
00:26:59,313 --> 00:27:01,228
- Yes.
- Did you play the Jack?
491
00:27:01,358 --> 00:27:03,404
I played the Jack.
492
00:27:03,534 --> 00:27:05,798
You're irritated by qualities
you see in me
493
00:27:05,928 --> 00:27:07,930
that are actually of yourself
or something.
494
00:27:08,061 --> 00:27:09,497
I don't buy that theory.
495
00:27:09,628 --> 00:27:11,630
Seth, Chester Brown
and Joe Matt
496
00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:13,370
were called The Toronto Three.
497
00:27:13,501 --> 00:27:15,111
They were just always together.
498
00:27:15,242 --> 00:27:16,460
They always got together,
499
00:27:16,591 --> 00:27:19,246
and at one point or another,
500
00:27:19,376 --> 00:27:20,900
they all did
autobiographical comics.
501
00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:23,250
So naturally
they would draw their friends,
502
00:27:23,380 --> 00:27:25,905
and their friends
happened to be each other.
503
00:27:26,035 --> 00:27:28,559
I don't know if you read this,
but you'll see,
504
00:27:28,690 --> 00:27:30,605
it's like the two of them
against me.
505
00:27:30,736 --> 00:27:32,476
This is true. This is true.
506
00:27:32,607 --> 00:27:34,261
I'm not denying that.
507
00:27:34,391 --> 00:27:37,046
Seth probably does feel
superior to a lot of people.
508
00:27:37,177 --> 00:27:39,875
But he also, you know,
has a built-in humility.
509
00:27:40,006 --> 00:27:42,835
And I think artists in general
are probably like this.
510
00:27:42,965 --> 00:27:46,490
To make you commit something
to paper or film,
511
00:27:46,621 --> 00:27:49,580
you've gotta have that arrogance
that whatever you're gonna say
512
00:27:49,711 --> 00:27:52,453
is worth taking up
people's time to be said.
513
00:27:52,583 --> 00:27:55,499
Writing about yourself
is a double-edged sword.
514
00:27:55,630 --> 00:27:58,546
Yes, you could get
at the real things,
515
00:27:58,677 --> 00:28:00,113
but you became overly aware
516
00:28:00,243 --> 00:28:02,681
of how you were choosing
to portray yourself.
517
00:28:02,811 --> 00:28:06,206
And that's why in Good Life,
though I'm the main character,
518
00:28:06,336 --> 00:28:10,210
it was fiction, and I felt free
to no longer worry about it.
519
00:28:10,340 --> 00:28:15,781
Seth has always liked mixing
fiction and fact together.
520
00:28:15,911 --> 00:28:18,871
Everybody who works with fiction
does that.
521
00:28:19,001 --> 00:28:21,743
But Seth really wants to blur
the lines between the two.
522
00:28:21,874 --> 00:28:25,051
He does want us to question
what's real and what isn't.
523
00:28:25,181 --> 00:28:28,228
That interior experience
is so hard to get outside
524
00:28:28,358 --> 00:28:30,665
of the shell of the human body.
525
00:28:30,796 --> 00:28:33,712
That's where the comics
are like an important way
526
00:28:33,842 --> 00:28:35,583
to try to communicate that.
527
00:28:35,714 --> 00:28:37,585
Fourteen hours ago,
528
00:28:37,716 --> 00:28:41,328
Albert Batch put down his pencil
and took to his bed.
529
00:28:41,458 --> 00:28:42,764
Here he has remained,
530
00:28:42,895 --> 00:28:45,027
drifting in and out
of consciousness.
531
00:28:45,158 --> 00:28:48,161
He recalls the faces
of the people he's known.
532
00:28:48,291 --> 00:28:50,511
He thinks
of the places he's seen.
533
00:28:50,641 --> 00:28:52,643
What did any of it mean?
534
00:28:54,167 --> 00:28:57,387
In this moment, he realizes
this is what his work
535
00:28:57,518 --> 00:28:59,041
should have been about.
536
00:28:59,172 --> 00:29:01,087
The idea is so vivid
537
00:29:01,217 --> 00:29:05,482
that Albert almost rises up
to go back to the drawing table.
538
00:29:05,613 --> 00:29:07,093
But he doesn't.
539
00:29:10,270 --> 00:29:12,011
We hear the death rattle.
540
00:29:23,979 --> 00:29:26,373
Perhaps it had been a mistake
moving to a town
541
00:29:26,503 --> 00:29:28,244
where I didn't know
a single soul.
542
00:29:28,375 --> 00:29:29,768
By December, though,
543
00:29:29,898 --> 00:29:32,205
I had become pretty used
to spending
544
00:29:32,335 --> 00:29:35,034
almost every waking moment
alone in my studio.
545
00:29:35,164 --> 00:29:37,950
When that became unbearable,
I'd read a book,
546
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:41,257
or listen to a record.
547
00:29:41,388 --> 00:29:43,869
No one ever spoke to me.
548
00:29:43,999 --> 00:29:47,568
And as the months passed,
I began to imagine
549
00:29:47,698 --> 00:29:50,571
that I was living
an invisible life.
550
00:29:50,701 --> 00:29:52,225
Often I'd go for a walk,
551
00:29:52,355 --> 00:29:55,271
and then eat lunch
at a nearby restaurant.
552
00:29:55,402 --> 00:29:57,143
Egg salad, please.
553
00:29:58,971 --> 00:30:01,756
At times, it seemed grim.
554
00:30:05,412 --> 00:30:09,764
On the way to that restaurant,
there was a large vacant lot
555
00:30:09,895 --> 00:30:13,028
surrounded, for some odd reason,
with big concrete blocks.
556
00:30:13,159 --> 00:30:15,901
In my silence,
this empty space
557
00:30:16,031 --> 00:30:19,295
began to take on
a solemn quality,
558
00:30:19,426 --> 00:30:21,776
a sort of charged presence.
559
00:30:25,736 --> 00:30:27,477
On one sad, lonely morning,
560
00:30:27,608 --> 00:30:31,481
I found myself speaking aloud
as I walked through it.
561
00:30:31,612 --> 00:30:33,483
Good God...
562
00:30:33,614 --> 00:30:35,746
give me some happiness.
563
00:30:37,792 --> 00:30:40,664
The perfect spot
for an atheist prayer.
564
00:30:40,795 --> 00:30:43,667
Knowing full well
that no supreme being
565
00:30:43,798 --> 00:30:46,714
was listening
or looking out for me.
566
00:30:46,845 --> 00:30:50,979
Still, a few weeks later,
when I first saw her sweet face,
567
00:30:51,110 --> 00:30:52,894
I couldn't help but wonder.
568
00:30:53,025 --> 00:30:54,635
Hi.
569
00:30:56,028 --> 00:30:58,073
Well, um, we met in art class.
570
00:30:58,204 --> 00:31:01,468
Um... but I don't draw
and I don't teach.
571
00:31:01,598 --> 00:31:03,383
I'm a model.
572
00:31:03,513 --> 00:31:05,559
I didn't come up
and talk to you.
573
00:31:05,689 --> 00:31:08,083
As one of the artists,
you don't start talking
574
00:31:08,214 --> 00:31:10,520
to the nude model
in a life-drawing class;
575
00:31:10,651 --> 00:31:12,131
that's just inappropriate.
576
00:31:12,261 --> 00:31:14,263
So you came up and talked
to me, which was nice.
577
00:31:14,394 --> 00:31:17,701
And within a couple of months,
we were married.
578
00:31:17,832 --> 00:31:21,923
So it was really, you know,
a surprising turn of events.
579
00:31:22,054 --> 00:31:25,361
Uh, we're both
into persona building.
580
00:31:25,492 --> 00:31:30,192
That's part of the appeal
of design and fashion and art.
581
00:31:30,323 --> 00:31:33,326
He's always got a dream world,
and that's who he is.
582
00:31:33,456 --> 00:31:36,851
My interest
in the aesthetics in the past
583
00:31:36,982 --> 00:31:40,811
is clearly predicated
on the fact
584
00:31:40,942 --> 00:31:43,249
that I live here in this world
as it is now.
585
00:31:43,379 --> 00:31:47,427
The marquee, yeah, I love it.
It's so beautiful.
586
00:31:47,557 --> 00:31:50,604
It's certainly
a Guelph landmark.
587
00:31:50,734 --> 00:31:53,389
Even the house, I'm not trying
to transform that house
588
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:55,957
back into, like, 1920.
It's more of an art project
589
00:31:56,088 --> 00:31:59,047
than it is like
a historical project.
590
00:31:59,178 --> 00:32:03,051
I'm just trying to make it
the world I wanna live in.
591
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:06,707
The fact that is says
"Nothing Lasts" on that,
592
00:32:06,837 --> 00:32:10,015
is what they used to call,
I believe, a memento mori,
593
00:32:10,145 --> 00:32:12,713
to remind everyone
that kings and paupers,
594
00:32:12,843 --> 00:32:14,584
we're all gonna die.
595
00:32:14,715 --> 00:32:17,761
The Middle Ages were great
for bringing you down.
596
00:32:17,892 --> 00:32:19,720
But nothing does last;
597
00:32:19,850 --> 00:32:21,374
everything is transient.
598
00:32:21,504 --> 00:32:24,072
And even though I say that,
we still,
599
00:32:24,203 --> 00:32:26,466
like all romantic couples,
you still say,
600
00:32:26,596 --> 00:32:29,643
"I hope I see you
in the afterlife."
601
00:32:29,773 --> 00:32:31,166
There's still always that, like,
602
00:32:31,297 --> 00:32:33,255
somewhere
in the back of the mind,
603
00:32:33,386 --> 00:32:35,779
that you don't really
want anything to end.
604
00:32:38,739 --> 00:32:41,481
A year or so
after Albert's death,
605
00:32:41,611 --> 00:32:43,570
an oddball fan
approached psychics
606
00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:46,486
to see if they could communicate
with the cartoonist.
607
00:32:46,616 --> 00:32:48,531
Apparently
Albert had found his way
608
00:32:48,662 --> 00:32:50,881
to some otherworldly
cartoonist Valhalla.
609
00:32:51,012 --> 00:32:53,580
George Harriman was there,
Charles Schultz,
610
00:32:53,710 --> 00:32:55,495
Doug Wright,
611
00:32:55,625 --> 00:32:57,149
and Peter Arnold.
612
00:32:57,279 --> 00:32:59,760
Robert Crumb, as well.
613
00:32:59,890 --> 00:33:01,414
This cast some doubt
614
00:33:01,544 --> 00:33:03,590
on the validity
of Madame Flotsky's vision,
615
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:06,462
since Crumb is still
very much alive at present.
616
00:33:08,943 --> 00:33:12,033
You can certainly have all
the self-doubts in the world,
617
00:33:12,164 --> 00:33:15,602
but that's why an artist
has to make a leap of faith.
618
00:33:15,732 --> 00:33:17,952
And so when you have that book
in your hands, it says:
619
00:33:18,083 --> 00:33:22,304
"This is what my life is about,"
then my life has meaning.
620
00:33:22,435 --> 00:33:26,004
And since I do feel that,
I wanted to pass that experience
621
00:33:26,134 --> 00:33:28,571
onto my father.
I wanted to be able
622
00:33:28,702 --> 00:33:30,660
for him to have
a book of his life,
623
00:33:30,791 --> 00:33:33,098
that he could hold it
in his hands and say:
624
00:33:33,228 --> 00:33:36,275
"I wasn't just here ephemerally.
I've left a record behind."
625
00:33:36,405 --> 00:33:40,627
"How dare you
disturb my comfort?
626
00:33:40,757 --> 00:33:43,108
State your business and get out.
I told him my problem.
627
00:33:43,238 --> 00:33:45,414
He told me he had no money
for the poor,
628
00:33:45,545 --> 00:33:48,591
and opened the door
for me to leave."
629
00:33:48,722 --> 00:33:52,987
As soon as you got an apple
from the old lady next door,
630
00:33:53,118 --> 00:33:56,686
you had a bunch of friends,
"Oh, Johnny, Johnny!" Yes?
631
00:33:56,817 --> 00:33:58,340
"Can I have the core?"
632
00:33:59,646 --> 00:34:02,866
"Well, okay,
wait till I get to it, then."
633
00:34:02,997 --> 00:34:05,347
Finally another guy:
"Can I have the seeds?"
634
00:34:05,478 --> 00:34:08,742
"The seeds are no good to eat."
"I like 'em."
635
00:34:08,872 --> 00:34:11,310
That's how bad it was.
636
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:13,703
When the book came out
and I sent it to him,
637
00:34:13,834 --> 00:34:15,662
I didn't really get
much of a response initially.
638
00:34:15,792 --> 00:34:17,098
I remember thinking:
639
00:34:17,229 --> 00:34:18,839
Well,
that's a little disappointing.
640
00:34:18,969 --> 00:34:21,842
I thought maybe it just doesn't
mean as much to him
641
00:34:21,972 --> 00:34:24,671
to have a book out
as it means to me.
642
00:34:24,801 --> 00:34:27,674
But then about a year,
maybe a year and half later,
643
00:34:27,804 --> 00:34:31,025
I was out visiting him
and he said some things to me
644
00:34:31,156 --> 00:34:33,810
and we had a moment together
where I could see
645
00:34:33,941 --> 00:34:36,596
that it had been a very
meaningful experience to him.
646
00:34:36,726 --> 00:34:39,251
He knew I'd had a complicated
childhood with him,
647
00:34:39,381 --> 00:34:42,123
and that as a teenager,
we had our problems, too.
648
00:34:42,254 --> 00:34:44,169
But I think
that was that realization
649
00:34:44,299 --> 00:34:46,475
that there was a real depth
of connection.
650
00:34:46,606 --> 00:34:50,044
And, um...
that was very touching to me,
651
00:34:50,175 --> 00:34:51,785
because... it's, you know,
652
00:34:51,915 --> 00:34:55,789
it's very hard
to tell anyone else that, um...
653
00:34:55,919 --> 00:34:59,706
to, like, impart
the depth of feeling you have
654
00:34:59,836 --> 00:35:04,232
for someone like that,
for your mother or your father.
655
00:35:12,066 --> 00:35:15,069
I step out
for a late-night smoke.
656
00:35:17,506 --> 00:35:19,029
A beautiful night,
657
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:21,075
cool and clear.
658
00:35:24,687 --> 00:35:27,386
I amble up
towards Mother's stone,
659
00:35:27,516 --> 00:35:29,083
a kind of memorial
660
00:35:29,214 --> 00:35:32,782
I've installed to her
in a corner of the yard.
661
00:35:32,913 --> 00:35:35,655
Where are you now, Mother?
662
00:35:35,785 --> 00:35:38,788
And naturally, I look up.
663
00:35:38,919 --> 00:35:42,923
A large full moon in the sky,
and a single star,
664
00:35:43,053 --> 00:35:44,925
as if in its orbit.
665
00:35:46,405 --> 00:35:48,624
For such a clear night,
I can't see another star.
666
00:35:54,543 --> 00:35:57,633
It seems
pretty obvious symbolism.
667
00:35:57,764 --> 00:36:01,159
The female moon: Mother;
668
00:36:01,289 --> 00:36:03,726
and I, a circling star.
669
00:36:09,515 --> 00:36:12,300
When your mother dies,
there's a real feeling
670
00:36:12,431 --> 00:36:15,434
that some real connection
to the world is gone.
671
00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:18,741
Like many stiff-upper-lip
kind of Brits,
672
00:36:18,872 --> 00:36:21,527
she had kept her pain to herself
all her life.
673
00:36:21,657 --> 00:36:25,008
And even to the end,
she did that to a big degree.
674
00:36:25,139 --> 00:36:27,315
She... but you could see
675
00:36:27,446 --> 00:36:30,188
that there was genuine fear
and sadness in her.
676
00:36:30,318 --> 00:36:32,364
And that was really painful
to see.
677
00:36:32,494 --> 00:36:34,366
And it was also really painful
678
00:36:34,496 --> 00:36:37,586
to know that she had forgotten
everything about me.
679
00:36:37,717 --> 00:36:40,546
To feel such a close connection
to someone,
680
00:36:40,676 --> 00:36:44,463
and to know they don't remember
any of your childhood anymore,
681
00:36:44,593 --> 00:36:46,769
and maybe
they don't even remember you.
682
00:36:48,989 --> 00:36:52,035
All my work is created
from that sense of loss.
683
00:36:52,166 --> 00:36:54,560
I feel the strong sense
that the baseline
684
00:36:54,690 --> 00:36:56,431
to human experience
is sadness.
685
00:36:56,562 --> 00:37:00,870
I mean, it doesn't feel too sad
that this moment's passing away.
686
00:37:01,001 --> 00:37:03,438
That's not a slight towards you.
687
00:37:03,569 --> 00:37:06,441
I just mean this particular
moment, it's fresh.
688
00:37:06,572 --> 00:37:10,445
So when it passes, you know,
it's just a few minutes,
689
00:37:10,576 --> 00:37:13,796
but in a year
this experience of being here
690
00:37:13,927 --> 00:37:16,059
will be completely
beyond my grasp.
691
00:37:16,190 --> 00:37:19,062
There will just be bits
and pieces of it left.
692
00:37:19,193 --> 00:37:21,195
That whole process
of constantly losing everything,
693
00:37:21,326 --> 00:37:24,198
and as you get older,
places vanish into the past,
694
00:37:24,329 --> 00:37:26,548
they're not even existing
in the world anymore,
695
00:37:26,679 --> 00:37:29,595
people you loved
end up being just in the past.
696
00:37:29,725 --> 00:37:32,859
I think that whole experience
of being trapped in the present
697
00:37:32,989 --> 00:37:35,296
while everything is constantly
moving in the past
698
00:37:35,427 --> 00:37:37,690
creates a deep feeling
of sadness in me.
699
00:37:37,820 --> 00:37:40,388
And I think all my work
is about that.
700
00:37:40,519 --> 00:37:42,085
So even though in that city,
701
00:37:42,216 --> 00:37:45,524
I did not create it specifically
with that in mind,
702
00:37:45,654 --> 00:37:48,309
that is an underlying force
behind its creation.
703
00:37:50,616 --> 00:37:53,096
I guess to recapture
some of the pleasures
704
00:37:53,227 --> 00:37:55,142
of building things as a child...
705
00:37:55,273 --> 00:37:56,796
I started building
these buildings
706
00:37:56,926 --> 00:38:00,190
as I started figuring out
the history of this town.
707
00:38:00,321 --> 00:38:02,889
The town itself
is an imaginary town
708
00:38:03,019 --> 00:38:04,543
set in northern Ontario.
709
00:38:04,673 --> 00:38:06,545
What you see here, really,
710
00:38:06,675 --> 00:38:10,853
is just the tip of the iceberg
of the amount...
711
00:38:10,984 --> 00:38:13,769
of imaginative thought
I'm going to have to put
712
00:38:13,900 --> 00:38:16,772
in to constructing
the history of the city.
713
00:38:16,903 --> 00:38:20,210
Originally the purpose was
for this possible graphic novel.
714
00:38:20,341 --> 00:38:21,951
As the city
has grown in complexity
715
00:38:22,082 --> 00:38:24,258
and the history has grown
more interesting to me,
716
00:38:24,389 --> 00:38:26,260
in some levels
I think I'm just enjoying
717
00:38:26,391 --> 00:38:28,393
making it up
and going through it.
718
00:38:28,523 --> 00:38:30,786
I'm not sure
what the actual purpose is.
719
00:38:49,109 --> 00:38:51,459
The Ott Typewriter Building.
720
00:38:51,590 --> 00:38:53,505
The North Star Restaurant.
721
00:38:54,897 --> 00:38:57,117
There's probably 40 or 50
buildings here at the moment.
722
00:38:57,247 --> 00:39:00,947
This will probably double
at some point to at least 100.
723
00:39:01,077 --> 00:39:02,601
I'll probably stop building them
724
00:39:02,731 --> 00:39:04,907
when I run out of space
in the basement.
725
00:39:09,608 --> 00:39:11,392
1949. I was correct.
726
00:39:11,523 --> 00:39:14,917
It was the 85th anniversary
of the founding of the town.
727
00:39:22,011 --> 00:39:23,796
Each parade is opened
728
00:39:23,926 --> 00:39:26,233
with a large figure
of their founder,
729
00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:29,323
J. Morgan Smith,
in his coffin.
730
00:39:46,732 --> 00:39:49,604
The parade always ends
with a large live figure
731
00:39:49,735 --> 00:39:51,954
of him carrying
the key to the city.
732
00:39:52,085 --> 00:39:53,695
So it's got a bit
733
00:39:53,826 --> 00:39:57,743
of that death and rebirth
kind of imagery to it as well.
734
00:40:00,789 --> 00:40:02,791
I realized that with a city
735
00:40:02,922 --> 00:40:05,664
of roughly 300,000,
which is what I imagined,
736
00:40:05,794 --> 00:40:09,363
that means I have an infinite
amount of material to work with,
737
00:40:09,494 --> 00:40:12,584
that I could be thinking
about this until I die.
738
00:40:24,378 --> 00:40:26,467
Remarkable weather today.
739
00:40:26,598 --> 00:40:29,252
It started out light
in the morning,
740
00:40:29,383 --> 00:40:31,211
but quickly got heavier.
741
00:40:31,341 --> 00:40:34,693
By mid-afternoon,
the town felt snowbound.
742
00:40:37,783 --> 00:40:41,134
I spent the day
down in the studio,
743
00:40:41,264 --> 00:40:44,703
wrapped in a wonderful feeling
of isolation.
744
00:40:44,833 --> 00:40:46,269
By evening,
745
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:48,489
I had to come up
and take a look.
746
00:40:48,620 --> 00:40:51,187
The accumulation
was breathtaking.
747
00:40:52,145 --> 00:40:54,582
Literally several feet
of new snow.
748
00:40:57,803 --> 00:41:01,241
A fresh, glittering blanket
of pearl.
749
00:41:03,809 --> 00:41:07,203
It's hard to imagine
any concept of heaven
750
00:41:07,334 --> 00:41:10,816
that could be more beautiful
than this world.
751
00:41:54,294 --> 00:41:58,733
And if there's one thing I can
take away from this experience,
752
00:41:58,864 --> 00:42:01,736
it's that I will never do
another documentary
753
00:42:01,867 --> 00:42:04,217
in the rest of my life.
754
00:42:04,347 --> 00:42:06,306
Subtitling: CNST, Montreal
56027
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.