All language subtitles for Min.Bedste.Fjende.ENGMin.Bedste.Fjende.ENG

MY GOOD ENEMY

Please don't.
It's brand new.

Can you say "fat pig"?
- Yeah, say "fat pig".

Come on. Say it. Say "fat pig".
- "Fat pig".

That's right. You're a fat pig.

Take a picture.

Smile!

Danish... Maths...

Lunchbox.

Stop, please.

"THIS MEANS SOMETHING TO ME"

I've scored 140 goals with these.
They're pretty worn -

but I keep them anyway.

Thanks.
Mathias.

This is my diabolo.

Wow. Nice.
Was that it?

Okay. Cool. Tilde, you're up.

This is my movie collection.
Or part of it, actually.

I've got a paper route.
I spend way too much on movies.

Good. Thanks.
Next?

This is my favorite perfume.

I got the first bottle from my cousin,
and now I use it every day.

Thank you.

Toke, it's your turn.

This is my rabbit Samson.
He's a really good friend.

Quiet.
How long have you had him, Toke?

Since I was little.

He belongs to the family Leporidae
and species Oryctolagus cuniculus.

Remember to use a condom.

Anything else, Toke?

No.
- Okay. Fine.

Go ahead, Johannes.

This is my phone. It's got a camera,
music, Wi-Fi and everything.

Touch it, and I kick your ass.
- Okay, okay. That'll do.

Alf.

I also brought my phone.
- Stop.

Why is it your phones are so
important? Can you tell me, Alf?

I don't know.
- Is there nothing you care about?

Where's your ballet dress?

Mathias! I'd like you to show
some respect for your classmates.

You dance ballet?

I used to, but I quit.
- That's a lie.

Why did you quit?

Anything else?
- No.

Okay. Sit down.

Who's next?

No! Help!
- Make him dance.

Dance when I say dance!
- Alf! What a dumbass name.

Stop it!
- Say you're sorry.

For what?
- For making me waste time on you.

Sorry.
- Say it like you mean it.

I'm sorry.
- You don't mean it!

Stop! Help!

No! Don't!

Alf, sweetie.
Are you okay?

What happened?
- I fell.

Can you wiggle it?

What happened?
Come on, tell me.

Well that was silly.

We spend a lot of time and energy
so you can go to ballet.

I'll call a cab. I have a late shift.
Can you take your brother home?

Good morning.

Do you realize how hard it is
to make toast?

Thanks.
- You can borrow my comic books.

Okay. Have a nice day at school.
- Thanks.

GIVE ME A HAND, NICCOLO.
THE WHEEL IS RUINED.

ON THREE, FATHER.

IS IT TOO HARD, SON?
NEED YOUR SISTER TO HELP?

THAT LOOKS PRETTY EASY.

STAND UP STRAIGHT, NICCOLO.
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.

NO.

I'LL KILL YOU ALL!!!

NICCOLO! HELP!

BASTARDS!!!
LEAVE HER ALONE!!!

...MY WHOLE FAMILY...
I VOW REVENGE!

WITHOUT AN ALLY,
I'LL STAY SMALL AND WEAK!

Hi. Is Toke home?

Just follow the grasshoppers.

Hi.

Is that Samson? Can I hold him?
- What are you doing here?

I want to talk to you
about something.

So what is it you want to talk about?

They hit us. They spit on us.
They laugh at us.

I'm sick of being picked last in sports.
I'm sick of being invisible to the girls.

That's just the way it is.
There's nothing we can do about it.

We don't belong on the bottom. We
can beat Mathias if we join forces.

This is Niccolo.
It's a series in five volumes.

I have four of them.
The fifth one hasn't come out yet.

This is Niccolo. You can see
step by step how he gets his power.

BEG FOR MERCY!!!

His life is also ruined
by a bunch of jerks.

But he doesn't give up.

He thinks strategically
and lays out traps.

He wipes out his enemies one by one.

PREPARE TO DIE!!!
SCUM!!!

YOU MUST BE AS SLY
AS A FOX TO SURVIVE.

It's easy to get power.

This is Mathias.

Except Mathias is a little bigger.

What did you have in mind?

We start a club.
- A club?

Yeah, a club.
- Sounds stupid.

If they see us together,
things will just get worse.

No one will know
we're working together.

My sister comes in here
once in a while.

It's pot.
My sister is a bit of a stoner.

Isn't it okay?
- It's perfect.

If you want school milk,
then remember to sign up.

We decided to get new football goals.
The old ones are ruined.

Is that all from the student council?

Does anyone else have anything
they want to discuss?

Maybe about
the class in general?

Okay, time for cake.
It's your turn, Alf. Did you bring any?

Yes.
- Good. Hand some out.

Thanks.

Tilde, you have something
stuck in your teeth.

Oh, sorry. It's just braces.

Unfortunately, we won't see
each other till Monday.

I would like you
to have finished the book by then.

Delicious cake, Alf.

I bet you'd get ballet cooties
if you ate that crap.

Mathias is protected.

We must weaken those around him.
- You and I can't weaken anybody.

Go for the weakest lamb
in the jungle.

Lambs don't live in jungles.
- Then gazelles or...

You know what I mean.
Easy prey.

How about Anemone?

Blaps mucronata.
The churchyard beetle. It stinks.

No way.

Okay, on now.
1, 2, 3, now.

Damn.

It's too thick.

You sure are brainy, Anemone.

Katrina, can I go to the bathroom?
- Yes. Hurry.

Help!
Fatso's going for a dump.

X equals 17.

You can sit down now,
Anemone.

Isn't that a mistake?

Hey, hey.

There?
- Shouldn't that be a seven?

It is a seven, moron.

Massive load you dropped.

It's not funny.
- Sorry. That looked like a one.

Can I sit down now?

What's that smell?
- It's coming from you.

What's up?
- What's up?

What's that smell?
- What?

What have you been eating?
- Gross. You need a shower.

It's just my perfume.

I can't believe it's working.
- Welcome to a new life.

You've got one minute left to live.
What's the last thing you'd do?

Feed Samson.

You'd spend the last minute
of your life feeding your rabbit?

Yes.

What about your family?
- My parents aren't home much.

One minute more or less
doesn't make much difference.

What would you rather? Wake up
with no dick or get paint on your face?

Paint, of course.
- Good call.

That was low.

Hey, Tilde Metalmouth.
Come see this.

Leave me alone.

Here. Taste.

Nice and gross.

It suits you.

Tilde!

What's her problem?

Hi, Alfie.
How's your foot?

Come on, Alfie.

Come on!
- We're not even out of breath yet.

Come here, Alfie.

Where do you think you're going?

Lie still.

Try this.
Open your mouth.

Great new weapon we gave them.

It didn't take them long
to smoke us out.

They used the spray on everyone.

What makes them different from us?
They play football, they skateboard -

and they go to parties.

We like ballet and grasshoppers.
We've got to commit suicide.

Suicide?
- Or they'll keep stepping on us.

No matter how much
we humiliate them.

Look. Niccolo leaves his past
as a shepherd behind him.

He burns everything down.

TO BECOME KING
I MUST APPEAR A KING...

To be king,
he has to look like one first.

Here.
- Thanks.

Hi, Alf.
It's nice to see you.

How's your foot?
Is it better?

I won't be training anymore.

Okay. May I ask why?

You know you have a lot of talent.

Take your positions.

There. Done.

It's a rabbit, not an insect.
- But it makes you vulnerable.

I can't.
- Do it.

On three.

1...

2...

Count to five.
- Okay.

1...

2, 3...
- Damn. Damn.

4.
- Damn.

5.
- Damn!

Now we're ready.

We'll start Monday.

We'll take them out one by one.

This is Toke.
Leave a message after the beep.

Good morning.

Is Toke home?
- What have you done to him?

Is he home?
- No.

Is your foot okay now?
- I think so.

Where is all your ballet stuff?

Gone.

Is the last Niccolo out yet?
- No, sorry.

Let's go.

Tilde?
- Hi.

What's up?
- What's up?

This is my little sister Emma.
- Hi, Emma.

How's your foot?

Fine.
- Are you dancing again?

He quit.
- Emma!

Why isn't Toke in school?
Is he sick?

I think he's a bit down.
- Why?

His rabbit is gone.
- Oh no. Sophus?

Samson.

Emma, here's the key.
- Okay.

See you, Tilde. I like you.
- I like you, too.

Okay... bye...
- See you tomorrow in school.

It's Saturday tomorrow.
- Then I won't see you tomorrow.

I like your braces.

Why do you say that?
- I like train tracks.

See you, Alf.

Tilde?
That's not what I meant to say.

What then?

Braces are like jewels.
- Jewels?

Some people wear bracelets.
Others wear braces.

See you, Alf.

Hi.
Got any coke?

Hi.
Where have you been?

I've been thinking.
- On purpose?

Just listen. Rule number one:
Create an image.

Rub this in your hair.

We're done looking like morons.

CREATE AN IMAGE

Rule number two: Less talk,
more action.

Rule number three.
- How many are there?

Three. Divide and rule.
- Divide and rule?

Yeah.

If they're busy fighting each other,
they won't have time to beat on us.

Show us some skin.
- And shake that ass.

Toke, the hippo called.
It wants its body back.

He can't even fit on the screen.

Ever heard of a diet?
- That word's not in his dictionary.

Fast food is.
- Hand over your valuables.

Anything you want locked away?
How about you, Toke?

Have you three changed?
Then off you go.

If you're done changing,
then hit the courts.

How about you, Alf?
Are you joining us today?

Okay.

Come on, Toke. Move it.

It's your fault we're losing.
Stop falling down all the time.

Can I go get some water?
- Sure. Anemone, take Toke's place.

I'm busy.
- Come on. Just do it.

This one is Anemone's.
- This is Johannes'.

No, this is Johannes'.

Damn, there's a third one.
- He took a picture of me earlier.

Delete it.

"Kiss, kiss, kiss." Good one.
Okay, I'll send you one.

"Slurp, slurp, slurp." And a smiley.
Nice. I'll add a smiley to mine.

"You're nasty. Smile!"

Okay, here's another:

"Gym sucks. See you tonight.
Johannes."

Now Johannes accidentally sends
that to Mathias.

Oops.

What are you doing?
- Shut up, Frits.

Get the hinges back on!
Hurry!

Faster, Alf. Faster.

Keep your mouth shut.
- But what are you doing?

What are you doing?

Huh? What are you up to?
- We're looking for my inhaler.

Your inhaler?
- My asthma inhaler.

Frits, you've never had asthma.
- I just got it.

You just got it?

I don't want you hanging around
in here. Get back in there. Go!

Mathias, wait!
I don't know how it happened.

I didn't send him any texts.
I don't know where they came from.

I didn't write them. Wait up!

Mathias! Mathias!

Your phone.
Give me your phone!

What's going on?
- Don't read my messages.

What is this then?
- I don't know.

I didn't write that.
- It's over.

What's wrong? Mathias?
- Get lost. Go to hell.

To hell with them.

Victory dance!

I'd like to see you do better.

But you can! You dance ballet.
- Used to dance ballet.

Do a few steps.
- My foot is busted.

Come on.

Go on.

It's not funny.

Who is it?
- Tilde.

What does she want?
- To know what I'm up to.

There's one more club rule.
Rule number four:

No contact with Tilde.
You're in love with her.

What?
- Sex is power.

Sex? I've never touched her.
- But you'd like to.

No. Says who?

Fair enough.
Then the fourth rule is: No girlfriends.

She's not my girlfriend.
- Okay. No contact with geeky girls.

Did you hear what I just said?
- I'm texting her that I...

No. Put that phone down.
- Okay, okay.

Hi.

Hi.

I was wondering if you wanted to go
and see the new Johnny Depp movie.

At four.
- What's happening at four?

We might go to the movies.
- Have you really got time for that?

It's true. I can't.

Okay. Bye.
- Bye.

Careful your willie doesn't snag
on her braces.

Get lost.

Alf, come here.
I have something to show you.

Come.

Meet our two new members.
Frits and his cousin Frans.

Come here.

You told them about the club?

This only works because
no one knows we're behind it.

If they find out...
- When they find out.

Then what do you think they'll do?
They'll kick our asses.

Rule number five:
Gather an army.

We need lieutenants.
They'll do anything we say.

We don't even know that guy.
- The more, the better.

And they get to join just like that?
- I didn't say that.

Your knife.
- It was my dad's.

The knife, Frits.

Your turn.

Come on! It was a christening gift.
- Sacrifice something or forget it.

I don't have anything.
- You collect model airplanes.

I don't want to.
- Then get lost.

Didn't you hear what I said?
Get lost, loser.

Okay, okay.

Where is it?

Look out!

Less talk, more action.
Divide and rule.

Gather an army.

Here, put this on.

What are those?
- Our rules. Come here.

Let's wear these bracelets.

Our own sign.

Emma, you're a genius!

A little pot...
Hand me your lunchbox, Frans.

And an onion. We're all set.

Come in.

Excuse me. Tell me who did it.
- He did.

Mathias?
- He took it and hit me.

Did you take Frans' lunchbox?
- What?

Did you take Frans' lunchbox?

Who the hell is Frans?
- Open your bag.

What the hell is that doing there?

What's this?
Come with me.

It's not mine.
- Move it. Now!

Come along.

Sorry about that.

Okay, turn to page 14.
The platypus and the aardvark.

Stop it. Get in!

Awesome.
- What are you knuckleheads up to?

Get lost, Alexander.

What did you say?
- Are you deaf? I said: Get lost.

Guitar solo!

Take that!

What do we do now?

The machinery has to be oiled
with money.

Niccolo hands out money and gifts.
We'll do the same.

We're giving money away?
- Almost. We'll have a party.

I invited people to a party once.
Two showed up.

Did you have free booze?
Listen.

This'll be a party
they'll never forget.

It's all about the way you sell it.
- Can we do it?

Where do we get money from?

That's it for today.

I promised Toke and Alf
they could make an announcement.

We're tired of kiddie discos,
so we're having a party on Saturday.

Everyone but Alexander is invited.
- Everyone has to be invited.

Then sleepyhead better wake up.

It's all set: Free bar,
DJ, and most importantly:

No limits.
- And no grown-ups.

What? No parents?
- And no damn teachers.

When are you going to do
those dishes?

Won't you do them for me?
- What do I get for it?

Who is it?

Hello?
- No one.

Is the new Niccolo out?
- It is.

Here you go.
- Thanks.

FOLLOW ME
OR FEEL MY WRATH!!!

BOW BEFORE THE NEW KING!!!

Toke, we're leaving.

Make sure he eats properly.
- See you, Mom.

Take care of the place.
- Sure, Dad.

Hey, give me a hand.

Where did you get all that from?
- My dad gets it for free.

Grab a box.

I had three of these.
I could drink them all night.

Okay. See you.

Hi.

Why haven't you answered
my texts?

Are you thirsty?

I'll make you a drink.
A Tilde Surprise.

A little red wine, some Burn...
- Red wine and energy drink?

Yes, and peanuts!
Lots of peanuts.

And a ton of lemon slices.

Tilde Surprise.

It looks gross.

Can I talk to you?

What's up?
- What's up?

Having fun?
- Yeah. And you?

What the hell's going on?

Look at her.

We stood in a corner like that
looking pathetic. Remember?

We were just talking.

Is anything wrong?

Your name was Tilde, right?
What are you doing here?

Were you even invited?
- Why are you acting that way?

Hey, are those braces?
Can I hang my jacket on them?

Now you know how it feels.

Don't leave. I didn't mean it.
- And I thought Mathias was a jerk.

Hey, Alf.

Are you okay?

Come with me.

Come on.

Relax yourjaw.

Take it easy with that tongue.

Why did you do that to Mathias?

What do you mean?
- You know I dated him, right?

Yeah.

That's the only reason
I agreed to do this.

What are you talking about?

I'll spell my name. J-O...

...H- A-N...

Toke, Alf is in trouble.

Toke. Don't come in!

Stop it! Leave him alone!
- Let me go!

Stop it. He'll choke.
Let him go!

Put the lid on.

You're killing him!

Mathias...

Mathias.
- Okay, okay.

I'm such a moron.

Come on.
This is what we've been waiting for.

Go. See you tomorrow.
- Bye.

Hit the barbecue.

Again.

Again.

Get him.

Put some music on.
Get him!

Pig!

Pig!

Die!

Thanks for all the crap
you've given me.

Had enough?

Your turn.

We're leaving.

Damn it.

Fine. Stay on the bottom, Alf.
- Someone's coming!

If you get in my way,
I'll squash you.

- Mathias, come down here!
- Mathias!

- Hey, Mathias?
- Mathias!

Roll him over on his side.
- Do something!

Mathias!
- Hello?

My son has been assaulted.

It's just awful.
His parents are completely out of it.

He's lucky to be alive.

It's just so meaningless.

Sweetie, I understand you're upset.
It's really horrible.

Morning.

Turn to page 36.

Hey! Listen up! Page 36.

Be quiet and sit down.

Sorry I'm late.
- Fine.

Page 36, everyone.

What's your problem?
- Sorry, Alexander.

Shut up and go change.
Get out of here. Move it!

Come here, asshole.

From now on, you do as I say.
Got it?

I didn't hear you.
- Yes.

Toke?
We need to talk.

Let him in.

What do you want?
- Why are you doing this?

It's all a big mistake.
This club is a mistake.

Be careful.
Bring him over here.

Put the stake there.

You had it coming.

You should have believed in us.

You should have believed in me.

Even tiny maggots
can invade a pumpkin.

Toke!
- Get on with it.

Toke!

Pull, pull, pull.

Pull...

Stop.
Let's go.

Move it.

Alf.

What's his name?
- Her name. Jonesy.

Sorry I was like that...

There!

My biggest dream is to be as good
at football as Thierry Henry.

Hard to do with a broken leg.
- Frits!

Alf, you're next.

This is Samson.

He and I have something in common.

We've both lost our best friend.

I have one wish...

My biggest dream is for
Samson and I to get our friend back.

Hi.

How did you find him?

He didn't run very far.

My biggest dream
has already come true.

So, Alf.
You want to dance again...

Your foot might not heal properly.

But you know that.

Ready when you are.

THE END
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