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1
00:00:01,420 --> 00:00:03,130
MARY: Absolutely not.
2
00:00:03,131 --> 00:00:05,319
But we're in Europe, the birthplace
of the modern rail system.
3
00:00:05,320 --> 00:00:07,930
It is also the birthplace
of the guillotine.
4
00:00:07,931 --> 00:00:09,425
You're not playing with that, either.
5
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:11,099
But I'm a college senior
and I know more about trains
6
00:00:11,100 --> 00:00:13,430
- than Richard Trevithick.
- Who?
7
00:00:13,431 --> 00:00:15,640
He built the first working
steam locomotive.
8
00:00:15,641 --> 00:00:16,900
I don't care.
9
00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:20,050
You are not gallivanting around
Europe on a train by yourself.
10
00:00:20,051 --> 00:00:22,188
German children ride trains
by themselves all the time.
11
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,774
When you become a
German child, we'll talk.
12
00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:26,330
(GROWLS)
13
00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:30,560
(SIGHS)
14
00:00:30,580 --> 00:00:31,740
Richard Trevithick?
15
00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:33,800
How does he know these things?
16
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:38,706
Oh, George wrote me a letter.
17
00:00:41,940 --> 00:00:43,060
GEORGE: Dear Mary,
18
00:00:43,061 --> 00:00:45,419
hope you and Sheldon are
having a great time in Germany.
19
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:47,005
(SIGHS) So great.
20
00:00:47,006 --> 00:00:48,539
Got the phone bill the other day.
21
00:00:48,540 --> 00:00:50,360
- It was a whopper.
- Oh.
22
00:00:50,361 --> 00:00:51,699
I figured maybe, instead of calling,
23
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:53,520
we should try the good ol' U.S. mail.
24
00:00:54,460 --> 00:00:55,940
Everything here is fine.
25
00:00:55,941 --> 00:00:57,619
A little crowded since the tornado,
26
00:00:57,620 --> 00:00:59,059
but it's bringing us together.
27
00:00:59,060 --> 00:01:00,180
(POUNDING)
28
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:02,340
Missy, I got business to tend to.
29
00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:03,840
MISSY: I'll be out in a second.
30
00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,470
Is she almost done? I got to shower.
31
00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:08,600
There's a line or a hose out back.
32
00:01:08,620 --> 00:01:09,840
Take your pick.
33
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:11,840
(SIGHS)
34
00:01:12,610 --> 00:01:14,100
Count of three!
35
00:01:14,110 --> 00:01:16,760
And our granddaughter is
getting more fun every day.
36
00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:18,537
Ah-boo.
37
00:01:19,622 --> 00:01:21,332
(CRYING)
38
00:01:23,180 --> 00:01:24,710
What is wrong with you?
39
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,180
It was just peek-a-boo.
40
00:01:28,181 --> 00:01:30,569
You'll be happy to know your
daughter made a new friend.
41
00:01:30,570 --> 00:01:31,599
Taylor.
42
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:33,280
And they've been hanging out a ton.
43
00:01:34,620 --> 00:01:36,471
Where're you going all dressed up?
44
00:01:36,472 --> 00:01:38,806
I'm not dressed up, and I'm
going to the mall with Taylor.
45
00:01:38,807 --> 00:01:40,850
When do I get to meet this girl?
46
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:42,518
Soon. Gotta go.
47
00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:43,771
(SIGHS)
48
00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:45,660
Okay, let's do this.
49
00:01:46,357 --> 00:01:49,420
? Nobody else is stronger than I am ?
50
00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:52,570
? Yesterday I moved a mountain ?
51
00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:54,960
? I bet I could be your hero ?
52
00:01:54,980 --> 00:01:57,660
? I am a mighty little man ?
53
00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:00,980
? I am a mighty little man. ?
54
00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:11,450
Ooh, she wrote back.
55
00:02:11,460 --> 00:02:12,925
Saving money already.
56
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:16,740
MARY: Dear George,
57
00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:19,560
it was really nice to get your letter.
58
00:02:19,570 --> 00:02:21,850
It reminds me of when
you were in Vietnam,
59
00:02:21,851 --> 00:02:24,339
except this time, I'm the
one in a foreign country
60
00:02:24,340 --> 00:02:25,940
and the enemy is Sheldon.
61
00:02:25,950 --> 00:02:27,200
(CHUCKLES)
62
00:02:27,201 --> 00:02:29,559
The other day, he wanted to
go riding around Germany,
63
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:31,540
by himself, on a train.
64
00:02:31,550 --> 00:02:33,540
But I put a stop to that.
65
00:02:33,550 --> 00:02:34,600
Good.
66
00:02:38,830 --> 00:02:41,270
(SPEAKING GERMAN)
67
00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:42,580
Shh.
68
00:02:42,581 --> 00:02:46,869
GEORGE: Your mom's been
going through a rough patch
69
00:02:46,870 --> 00:02:49,961
since she lost the house,
but she's a strong woman.
70
00:02:49,962 --> 00:02:52,088
You'd be proud of how
well she's dealing with it.
71
00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:53,339
Hey.
72
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:54,924
What are you doing?
73
00:02:54,925 --> 00:02:57,468
Taking one of your beers.
What are you doing?
74
00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:58,762
Writing Mary a letter.
75
00:02:59,460 --> 00:03:01,240
Too cheap for a phone call?
76
00:03:01,260 --> 00:03:03,060
You know how much those things cost?
77
00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,100
Tank of gas to say, "I miss you."
78
00:03:05,101 --> 00:03:08,139
Besides, this is nice,
writing back and forth,
79
00:03:08,140 --> 00:03:09,731
kind of like when I was in the Army.
80
00:03:09,732 --> 00:03:12,150
Oh, she writing you back, too, huh?
81
00:03:12,151 --> 00:03:14,820
- Mm-hmm.
- Huh.
82
00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:17,280
What?
83
00:03:17,281 --> 00:03:18,680
My house blows away,
84
00:03:18,700 --> 00:03:21,242
I don't even get a damn postcard.
85
00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:23,411
Well, you should write her
first. That's what I did.
86
00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:25,840
Well, I'm not her cheapskate husband.
87
00:03:29,620 --> 00:03:31,170
Heads up,
88
00:03:31,180 --> 00:03:34,180
I might kill your mother
before you get back.
89
00:03:35,007 --> 00:03:37,759
Oh, 7:19 to Frankfurt.
90
00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:39,480
Birthplace of the frankfurter.
91
00:03:39,481 --> 00:03:40,803
- That's a must-see.
- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
92
00:03:40,804 --> 00:03:43,848
- Sheldon, can I get you anything?
- No.
93
00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:45,890
- You sure? Cup of tea?
- I'm fine.
94
00:03:45,891 --> 00:03:48,060
- Hot chocolate?
- Why are you badgering me?
95
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,896
Whoa, what brought that on?
96
00:03:49,897 --> 00:03:53,357
Nothing. Everything's fine.
I just have to study.
97
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:54,984
(SIGHS) Is this about the train?
98
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:57,361
What? No. What train?
99
00:03:57,362 --> 00:04:00,300
Are you still mad that I
won't let you go alone?
100
00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:02,951
Yes.
101
00:04:03,640 --> 00:04:05,680
Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
102
00:04:05,681 --> 00:04:08,164
Someday, when you're a
parent, you'll understand.
103
00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,249
I'm sure I will.
104
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,740
Okay, then.
105
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:20,360
SHELDON: Dear Missy, I'm sure
you're surprised I'm writing to you,
106
00:04:20,380 --> 00:04:22,820
but I have a secret and
I have to tell someone
107
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:24,550
or my head will explode.
108
00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:25,620
Ooh.
109
00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,767
The other day, against Mother's orders,
110
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,727
I rode a train by myself.
111
00:04:29,728 --> 00:04:32,355
(SCOFFS) What a loser.
112
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:36,160
? Because you're mine ?
113
00:04:36,180 --> 00:04:38,940
? I walk the line ?
114
00:04:40,050 --> 00:04:42,250
? Because you're mine ?
115
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,993
? I walk the line... ?
116
00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:48,720
MEEMAW: George tells me you and Sheldon
117
00:04:48,740 --> 00:04:51,450
are having a good time in Germany.
118
00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:54,420
Things here are finally settling down.
119
00:04:54,430 --> 00:04:57,950
I moved in with Dale,
which has been great.
120
00:04:57,960 --> 00:05:01,050
He's been so supportive and patient...
121
00:05:01,070 --> 00:05:02,927
Could you play another song?
122
00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:04,470
I'm working on this song.
123
00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:07,056
My last nerve is what you're working on.
124
00:05:07,057 --> 00:05:09,517
Well, you got to practice
if you want to get good.
125
00:05:09,518 --> 00:05:12,220
For what? You're 74.
126
00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:14,397
You gonna play that song in hell?
127
00:05:14,398 --> 00:05:15,970
Look, this is my house,
128
00:05:15,980 --> 00:05:18,150
and in my house, I play the guitar.
129
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,778
I thought you said your
house was my house.
130
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:22,959
And in your house, there's
a guy who plays the guitar,
131
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:25,120
and he's getting pretty doggone good.
132
00:05:25,140 --> 00:05:26,784
(PLAYS MUFFLED NOTES)
133
00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,090
(GROANS) Oh.
134
00:05:29,940 --> 00:05:31,122
Guide's here.
135
00:05:31,123 --> 00:05:32,415
Mmm.
136
00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:35,084
Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett.
137
00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:36,502
What does she see in him?
138
00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:38,087
Women love musicians.
139
00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:40,131
Man, I got to learn to play guitar.
140
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,758
Why?
141
00:05:42,420 --> 00:05:45,637
So your love for me will deepen?
142
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:48,139
Nice save, Romeo.
143
00:05:48,140 --> 00:05:50,280
Oh, look. Another letter from Mom.
144
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:54,074
Aw. I think it's so romantic,
you two writing to each other.
145
00:05:54,540 --> 00:05:56,400
It's just 'cause he's a cheapskate.
146
00:05:56,420 --> 00:05:57,565
It can be both.
147
00:05:57,566 --> 00:05:58,817
Well, I think it's sweet.
148
00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:02,278
Well, I can write you
a letter if you want.
149
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,610
- Please don't.
- Why not?
150
00:06:04,620 --> 00:06:06,580
'Cause your spelling makes me sad.
151
00:06:07,220 --> 00:06:09,036
GEORGE JR.: I can use small words.
152
00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:14,920
MARY: Dear George, I really
loved your last letter.
153
00:06:15,660 --> 00:06:19,040
Who would have thought that I
would have a love affair in Germany
154
00:06:19,060 --> 00:06:20,840
and that it would be with you.
155
00:06:20,850 --> 00:06:22,820
I miss you all so much,
156
00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:25,440
but it sounds like
everyone is doing great.
157
00:06:25,450 --> 00:06:28,740
By the way, Missy's new friend Taylor,
158
00:06:28,750 --> 00:06:30,490
is that a boy or a girl?
159
00:06:33,090 --> 00:06:34,170
Missy!
160
00:06:37,356 --> 00:06:40,680
GEORGE: I've included some
Polaroids of your granddaughter
161
00:06:40,690 --> 00:06:42,940
and your hot American boy toy.
162
00:06:45,370 --> 00:06:48,510
Don't feel bad for being
confused about Missy's friend.
163
00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:50,810
He is a boy, but don't worry,
164
00:06:50,820 --> 00:06:52,330
I'm on top of it.
165
00:06:52,340 --> 00:06:53,497
Taylor's a boy?
166
00:06:54,210 --> 00:06:55,414
Yes.
167
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,667
So when you went to the movies
with him, he was a boy?
168
00:06:57,668 --> 00:06:58,793
Mm-hmm.
169
00:06:58,794 --> 00:07:00,569
And when you went swimming at his house,
170
00:07:00,570 --> 00:07:02,338
he was a boy with his shirt off?
171
00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:03,589
I never said he was a girl.
172
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:04,900
No, I said he was a girl
173
00:07:04,901 --> 00:07:06,175
and you didn't correct me.
174
00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:07,551
I don't remember who said what.
175
00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:10,096
Yes, you do. And that is the
last you're seeing of Taylor.
176
00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,469
Dad, it's not what you think.
177
00:07:11,470 --> 00:07:12,848
He doesn't like me like that.
178
00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:14,130
He's a 13-year-old boy.
179
00:07:14,150 --> 00:07:15,559
He likes all girls like that.
180
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,436
He's 15, and he doesn't.
181
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:18,771
Fifteen?
182
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:21,232
And he really doesn't.
183
00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:23,068
The hell does that mean?
184
00:07:26,620 --> 00:07:27,863
Oh.
185
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,074
Yeah.
186
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:33,411
So, he's like a... gal pal?
187
00:07:33,412 --> 00:07:34,579
Bingo.
188
00:07:36,150 --> 00:07:37,373
Okay.
189
00:07:37,374 --> 00:07:40,127
So, can I go to his house
and watch a movie?
190
00:07:40,750 --> 00:07:42,294
No other boys'll be there?
191
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,546
Just him and me.
192
00:07:43,547 --> 00:07:45,006
All right, then.
193
00:07:45,007 --> 00:07:46,508
Thanks, Daddy.
194
00:07:46,526 --> 00:07:49,677
GEORGE: It's a different world, Mare.
195
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,179
I'm proud of Missy for
keeping an open mind,
196
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:54,349
and, shoot, I'm proud of myself.
197
00:07:56,190 --> 00:07:58,436
By the way, I told my dad you're gay.
198
00:07:58,437 --> 00:07:59,810
Okay.
199
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:02,790
DALE: Hey.
200
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:05,568
Have you seen my guitar?
201
00:08:05,569 --> 00:08:07,737
No. Why?
202
00:08:07,738 --> 00:08:09,209
I could've sworn I
left it in the bedroom
203
00:08:09,210 --> 00:08:10,948
and now I can't find it anywhere.
204
00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,400
That's weird.
205
00:08:14,670 --> 00:08:15,829
Did you hide it?
206
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:19,331
I can't believe you would
accuse me of such a thing.
207
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,375
- Did you?
- Did I what?
208
00:08:21,376 --> 00:08:23,044
Hide my guitar.
209
00:08:23,045 --> 00:08:25,340
? Because you're mine ?
210
00:08:25,350 --> 00:08:27,757
? I lost my mind. ?
211
00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:29,008
Well, give it back.
212
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:31,430
Only under certain conditions.
213
00:08:31,450 --> 00:08:34,350
That guitar has been here
way longer than you have.
214
00:08:34,370 --> 00:08:35,848
You want to see it again?
215
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,641
What conditions?
216
00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:39,219
First of all, if I'm out of the house,
217
00:08:39,220 --> 00:08:40,770
you can play it all day long.
218
00:08:40,771 --> 00:08:42,313
That's reasonable.
219
00:08:42,314 --> 00:08:43,789
I'm a reasonable lady. Number two:
220
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:46,170
You cannot play the same song
221
00:08:46,171 --> 00:08:47,489
for more than five minutes.
222
00:08:47,490 --> 00:08:48,611
No, no, no, no.
223
00:08:48,612 --> 00:08:50,210
That's not how practice works.
224
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:52,865
Repetition is the key to mastery.
225
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,659
- Ten minutes.
- Deal.
226
00:08:54,660 --> 00:08:57,787
It's in the closet
behind the rain coats.
227
00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:59,081
Well, thank you.
228
00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:03,660
(DALE BEGINS PLAYING)
229
00:09:03,670 --> 00:09:05,252
? Because you're mine ?
230
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:07,170
Hold on, let me get my egg timer.
231
00:09:07,190 --> 00:09:09,591
? Because you're mine. ?
232
00:09:10,170 --> 00:09:12,218
- Auf wiedersehen.
- Where you going?
233
00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:13,469
Library.
234
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,730
- (WHISPERS): In Frankfurt.
- Have fun.
235
00:09:15,731 --> 00:09:17,509
ADULT SHELDON: As much as I hated lying,
236
00:09:17,510 --> 00:09:19,935
I loved trains just a little bit more.
237
00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:25,230
GEORGE JR.: Dear Mandy, there are
so many things I love about you,
238
00:09:25,250 --> 00:09:27,080
it's hard to know where to start.
239
00:09:27,090 --> 00:09:28,170
But I will.
240
00:09:28,180 --> 00:09:31,737
Sure, I could go on and
on about your beautiful...
241
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,970
B-E...
242
00:09:33,980 --> 00:09:36,535
Where does the dang "U" go?
243
00:09:37,790 --> 00:09:40,450
... pretty... boobs.
244
00:09:40,470 --> 00:09:42,030
But what's more important
245
00:09:42,050 --> 00:09:44,820
is what's underneath: Your heart.
246
00:09:44,830 --> 00:09:46,585
Oh, yeah. That's good.
247
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:47,795
Can I cash out?
248
00:09:47,796 --> 00:09:49,213
Oh. Sure.
249
00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:50,631
Hey, question...
250
00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:54,130
if you sneak into the bathroom
to watch a woman shower,
251
00:09:54,140 --> 00:09:56,220
is that romantic or creepy?
252
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:58,598
- Romantic.
- That's what I thought.
253
00:10:00,710 --> 00:10:03,103
And when you're alone in the shower...
254
00:10:05,470 --> 00:10:07,566
- Ticket?
- Oh.
255
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:18,285
Mm-hmm.
256
00:10:36,390 --> 00:10:37,679
Ja.
257
00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:46,410
(SNORING)
258
00:10:57,610 --> 00:11:00,076
(SNORING STOPS)
259
00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:05,456
(SNORING)
260
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:06,510
No.
261
00:11:17,790 --> 00:11:19,720
What... What the hell?
262
00:11:19,721 --> 00:11:21,722
- What?
- What are you doing?
263
00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:23,110
Wh...
264
00:11:23,130 --> 00:11:25,893
I'm just putting nose spray
in 'cause you're snoring.
265
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:29,230
Well, that's no reason to stick
something up my nose.
266
00:11:29,231 --> 00:11:30,356
I'm sorry.
267
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:32,960
I mean, if anybody snores, it's you.
268
00:11:32,970 --> 00:11:35,486
I mean, just look at that honker.
269
00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:37,154
That's not very nice.
270
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:40,532
What's not nice is
you violating my nose.
271
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,110
It's not gonna happen again.
272
00:11:43,150 --> 00:11:46,150
Hey, but listen, now that you're up,
273
00:11:46,170 --> 00:11:48,840
why don't we just spritz
the other nostril...
274
00:11:48,850 --> 00:11:50,000
Don't you dare!
275
00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:51,760
Okay, okay.
276
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:55,750
And for your information,
you fart all night long.
277
00:11:55,770 --> 00:11:57,910
It's 'cause of your cooking.
278
00:11:57,930 --> 00:11:59,960
Quit feeding me fajitas.
279
00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:04,265
SHELDON: Dear Missy, I'm
currently on my fifth train ride
280
00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,090
exploring Germany and the nations
281
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,400
of the former Austro-Hungarian Empire.
282
00:12:08,401 --> 00:12:10,479
It's often referred
to as a dual monarchy
283
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,829
because the Hapsburg ruler
284
00:12:11,830 --> 00:12:13,369
was both the emperor of Austria
285
00:12:13,370 --> 00:12:14,901
and the king of Hungary.
286
00:12:15,450 --> 00:12:18,028
Speaking of hungry... strudel.
287
00:12:18,029 --> 00:12:20,080
? ?
288
00:12:27,630 --> 00:12:30,160
- (WHISTLE BLOWS, ENGINE HISSES)
- (DOOR CLOSES)
289
00:12:31,530 --> 00:12:33,350
Wait! Wait!
290
00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:35,620
Warten! Warten!
291
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:37,798
That's German for "wait"!
292
00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:41,080
ADULT SHELDON: As you can
see, they did not warten.
293
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:43,630
(SPEAKING GERMAN)
294
00:12:51,350 --> 00:12:52,649
Sheldon Cooper.
295
00:12:52,650 --> 00:12:54,460
(PHONE RINGING)
296
00:12:54,461 --> 00:12:56,319
Hello?
297
00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:58,849
OPERATOR (GERMAN ACCENT): I have
a collect call from Sheldon Cooper.
298
00:12:58,850 --> 00:13:00,069
Do you accept the charges?
299
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,939
Sorry, my dad said it's
too expensive and...
300
00:13:01,940 --> 00:13:04,230
SHELDON: Missy, please,
it's an emergency!
301
00:13:04,780 --> 00:13:06,670
Fine. I accept.
302
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:07,770
OPERATOR: Go ahead.
303
00:13:07,780 --> 00:13:08,900
What?
304
00:13:08,901 --> 00:13:11,139
I'm stranded in a train station
in Weinheim, Germany,
305
00:13:11,140 --> 00:13:12,200
and I can't call Mom
306
00:13:12,201 --> 00:13:13,219
- because I lied about...
- Sorry.
307
00:13:13,220 --> 00:13:15,780
- I'm getting another call.
- SHELDON: Wait, don't...
308
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:17,410
Hello?
309
00:13:17,420 --> 00:13:18,580
Oh, hi, Taylor.
310
00:13:19,420 --> 00:13:20,966
Nothing. What're you up to?
311
00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,017
Missy!
312
00:13:22,560 --> 00:13:23,720
Missy?
313
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:25,680
Missy...
314
00:13:25,681 --> 00:13:30,479
GEORGE JR.: ... and not just 'cause
you're naked in the shower...
315
00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:32,780
'cause you're naked and all sudsy.
316
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:35,580
It's like watching MTV,
but in the bathroom.
317
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:37,620
Well, I hope that didn't sound creepy,
318
00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:40,700
but you're so pretty I
can't stop looking at you,
319
00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:43,782
even with clothes on covered
with CeeCee's spit-up.
320
00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,575
Oh, you're reading my letter.
321
00:13:46,576 --> 00:13:47,659
I'll come back.
322
00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,495
Oh, now you want to give me privacy?
323
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:51,539
So, it was creepy, huh?
324
00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:53,240
It was.
325
00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:55,876
Where you going?
326
00:13:55,877 --> 00:13:57,437
Well, I'm gonna go take a shower.
327
00:13:57,960 --> 00:13:59,700
Maybe I'll leave the door unlocked.
328
00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:03,530
Well, all right.
329
00:14:09,307 --> 00:14:11,392
It's okay, young man, we speak English.
330
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:13,563
But not as well as my
German, so stay with me.
331
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,040
(SIGHS)
332
00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:01,710
? I'm walking, yes, indeed ?
333
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:03,730
? And I'm talking about you and me ?
334
00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:06,864
? I'm hoping that you come back to me ?
335
00:15:06,865 --> 00:15:08,200
? Yeah ?
336
00:15:08,220 --> 00:15:10,493
? I'm lonely as I can be. ?
337
00:15:12,180 --> 00:15:13,360
(SHOWER RUNNING)
338
00:15:13,361 --> 00:15:15,959
- MANDY: (GASPS) Oh, God!
- GEORGE JR.: Dad, get out!
339
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:17,499
MANDY: Why didn't you lock the door?
340
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,610
GEORGE JR.: I didn't
want to miss anything.
341
00:15:19,611 --> 00:15:24,019
MARY: ... I've been sitting
here staring at your picture,
342
00:15:24,020 --> 00:15:26,519
thinking about all the
years we've been together
343
00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:31,305
and how I may have taken you
for granted the last few.
344
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:34,620
I do appreciate you, I do love you,
345
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:37,050
and I'm sorry I don't say it enough...
346
00:15:37,060 --> 00:15:39,840
or say it at all.
347
00:15:39,860 --> 00:15:43,660
So... rest up because when I get back,
348
00:15:43,670 --> 00:15:45,652
I'm gonna show you how mu...
349
00:15:45,653 --> 00:15:47,770
(PHONE RINGING)
350
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:53,060
- Hello?
- Mom, it's me.
351
00:15:53,061 --> 00:15:54,469
I know I'm not supposed to call,
352
00:15:54,470 --> 00:15:56,455
but Sheldon called and
said he's in trouble.
353
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,207
Sheldon's at the library.
354
00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:01,400
No, he's not. He's stuck at a train
station somewhere in Germany.
355
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:02,753
When did he call?
356
00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:05,500
- I don't know. Two, three hours ago...
- What?!
357
00:16:05,510 --> 00:16:07,560
You know, this is expensive,
I should go.
358
00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:10,690
Oh.
359
00:16:11,740 --> 00:16:13,181
I'm gonna kill him.
360
00:16:16,510 --> 00:16:17,601
What are you doing?
361
00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,460
I'm gonna go sleep in the other room
362
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:20,920
so we don't bug each other.
363
00:16:20,940 --> 00:16:22,564
And leave me here all alone?
364
00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:24,399
I thought you'd be happy.
365
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,840
Well, my nose might be happy,
366
00:16:25,860 --> 00:16:27,653
but the rest of me won't be.
367
00:16:27,654 --> 00:16:29,029
Aw.
368
00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:31,800
Unless you're leaving
because my snoring is so bad.
369
00:16:31,820 --> 00:16:33,534
Alleged snoring.
370
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:34,549
Alleged snoring?
371
00:16:34,550 --> 00:16:36,300
I'm going half deaf in this ear
372
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:37,871
from your alleged snoring.
373
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,957
Well, there must be a way to compromise.
374
00:16:39,958 --> 00:16:41,559
Compromise? There's no compromise.
375
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:43,877
You won't let me spritz
your nasal passages.
376
00:16:43,878 --> 00:16:45,780
Even if I did, that's not gonna stop
377
00:16:45,790 --> 00:16:48,048
the tear gas coming out of your pants.
378
00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:51,280
Onions in, onions out...
379
00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:53,595
We talked about this, you know.
380
00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:57,850
("I'M WALKIN'" BY FATS DOMINO PLAYING)
381
00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:01,812
(DOG BARKS NEARBY)
382
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:03,147
Oh, dear.
383
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,220
(GROWLING)
384
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:13,407
(GRUNTS)
385
00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:14,908
Uh, hello? Police?
386
00:17:14,909 --> 00:17:16,890
Sprechen English?
387
00:17:16,910 --> 00:17:18,220
Good, good. Um...
388
00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:21,190
My little boy is lost
at a train station.
389
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:22,890
No, I don't know which one...
390
00:17:22,910 --> 00:17:26,530
Um, he's, uh, five foot ten...
391
00:17:26,540 --> 00:17:28,256
Well, he's little to me!
392
00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,770
Never mind.
393
00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:34,386
What happened to you?
394
00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:35,804
Tough day.
395
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,432
At the library?
396
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:39,725
Yes.
397
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:42,103
Where's your other shoe?
398
00:17:43,620 --> 00:17:46,440
When I was leaving... the library,
399
00:17:46,450 --> 00:17:48,150
a wild dog attacked me.
400
00:17:48,151 --> 00:17:50,027
Oh, sweetie, no.
401
00:17:50,028 --> 00:17:52,279
I fought him off, but at
the price of a loafer.
402
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,906
Where's your backpack?
403
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:56,618
I guess he got that, too.
404
00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:01,246
Well... that all makes sense, Sheldon,
405
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:03,041
if that's what really happened.
406
00:18:03,910 --> 00:18:05,001
It is.
407
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:07,377
Okay, then.
408
00:18:07,378 --> 00:18:08,880
Why don't you go lie down?
409
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:12,966
I will. I'm tired from all
the things that happened...
410
00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:15,886
- At the library.
- At the library.
411
00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:17,520
MARY: Instead of punishing him,
412
00:18:17,540 --> 00:18:19,720
I'm letting him think
he got away with it.
413
00:18:19,740 --> 00:18:21,950
The guilt is eating him alive.
414
00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:24,770
I wish you were here
to enjoy it with me.
415
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:27,160
- Hey.
- Hey.
416
00:18:27,161 --> 00:18:30,651
Is it okay if Taylor and I hang out
in my room and listen to music?
417
00:18:30,652 --> 00:18:31,800
Sure.
418
00:18:31,801 --> 00:18:33,904
Just keep the door closed
so I don't have to hear it.
419
00:18:33,905 --> 00:18:35,100
You got it.
420
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:39,040
Probably gonna listen to show tunes.
421
00:18:41,240 --> 00:18:44,060
(SNORING)
422
00:18:44,070 --> 00:18:46,870
("THE BLUE DANUBE" BY
JOHANN STRAUSS II PLAYING)
423
00:18:46,890 --> 00:18:48,310
(FARTING)
424
00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:55,250
(FARTING AND SNORING CONTINUE)
425
00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:59,850
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