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1
00:00:36,118 --> 00:00:37,786
Darling, have you
seen my passport?
2
00:00:37,853 --> 00:00:40,188
I'm leaving soon, and I
really should have it.
3
00:00:40,255 --> 00:00:42,424
Dad, you're goin' to New Jersey.
4
00:00:42,491 --> 00:00:45,627
Still, border crossings are
nothing to be taken lightly.
5
00:00:45,695 --> 00:00:49,347
I'm afraid I learned
that the hard way.
6
00:00:49,414 --> 00:00:51,816
I think it's sweet that you
visit mom's grave every year.
7
00:00:51,884 --> 00:00:53,951
I can't believe
it's been 20 years.
8
00:00:54,019 --> 00:00:55,403
I know, and it's a
shame she never saw
9
00:00:55,471 --> 00:00:58,189
what a beautiful young
woman you've become.
10
00:00:58,257 --> 00:00:59,807
Thank you, dad.
11
00:00:59,875 --> 00:01:03,127
As always, I'll send her
your warmest regards.
12
00:01:03,195 --> 00:01:05,062
You know, actually,
I think I'm gonna-
13
00:01:05,130 --> 00:01:06,564
I'm gonna come with
you this time.
14
00:01:06,632 --> 00:01:09,334
Why? You-you-you never come.
15
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:11,386
I know. Well, I was a
teenager when she died,
16
00:01:11,454 --> 00:01:14,922
and I think I was angry at her
for leaving me without a mother,
17
00:01:14,990 --> 00:01:18,125
especially when I had to
go bra shopping with you.
18
00:01:18,193 --> 00:01:20,095
In retrospect, I
should've let you
19
00:01:20,162 --> 00:01:23,131
go into the dressing
room by yourself.
20
00:01:23,199 --> 00:01:24,866
Anyway, I'll see you on Monday.
21
00:01:24,934 --> 00:01:26,217
Dad, I said I'm gonna
come with you.
22
00:01:26,285 --> 00:01:27,385
You can't!
23
00:01:27,452 --> 00:01:28,920
Why not?
24
00:01:28,988 --> 00:01:30,822
I, uh...
25
00:01:30,890 --> 00:01:32,807
I'm staying with
your Uncle Chester,
26
00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:34,542
and he likes to walk
around in the nude.
27
00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:36,444
I won't have you see that again!
28
00:01:36,511 --> 00:01:38,279
Then we'll stay in a motel.
29
00:01:38,346 --> 00:01:40,715
Just give me a half
hour to get packed.
30
00:01:42,868 --> 00:01:44,035
Hey, babe, listen,
31
00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:46,137
I'm going up to new
Jersey with my father
32
00:01:46,205 --> 00:01:48,506
to visit my mom's grave
for the weekend.
33
00:01:48,573 --> 00:01:49,841
You're gonna be gone
the whole weekend?
34
00:01:49,909 --> 00:01:51,076
All right, you know what?
35
00:01:51,143 --> 00:01:53,111
Could you at least pretend
you're gonna miss me?
36
00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:56,347
Of course I'm gonna miss you.
I am. Ok?
37
00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:04,572
Which one of these goes
better with steak-ums?
38
00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:06,374
Um, I really don't know.
39
00:02:06,442 --> 00:02:07,692
I'm really intrigued by
these "flamin' hot" ones,
40
00:02:07,759 --> 00:02:10,561
but I hear if you eat the whole
bag, your tongue gets swollen.
41
00:02:10,629 --> 00:02:13,915
My manager just told me
to stack the bean dip.
42
00:02:13,983 --> 00:02:16,935
Hey, you know you're gonna get
'em both, so why the dance?
43
00:02:17,003 --> 00:02:18,803
Ray! I can't believe it!
44
00:02:18,871 --> 00:02:21,038
Hey, man! What's it
been, like, 2 years?
45
00:02:21,106 --> 00:02:22,156
At least. Yeah.
46
00:02:22,224 --> 00:02:24,276
What do we do? Do we shake?
You don't hug, right?
47
00:02:24,343 --> 00:02:26,744
I do. With some people, I do.
Yeah.
48
00:02:26,812 --> 00:02:28,513
All right. Cool.
49
00:02:28,581 --> 00:02:29,847
What are you doing here?
50
00:02:29,915 --> 00:02:31,849
You're not the only
one who eats, man.
51
00:02:31,917 --> 00:02:33,084
What do you got goin' on here?
52
00:02:33,152 --> 00:02:36,454
Uh, a log of salami,
chips, and cheese.
53
00:02:36,522 --> 00:02:38,857
I guess you're not buyin' into the
whole cholesterol thing, huh?
54
00:02:38,925 --> 00:02:40,091
Oh, I'm buyin' into it.
55
00:02:40,159 --> 00:02:41,859
I just want to see how high
I can get the numbers.
56
00:02:41,927 --> 00:02:43,411
So, what have you been up to?
57
00:02:43,479 --> 00:02:45,947
Nothin'. You know, they're
doin' the floors at my house,
58
00:02:46,014 --> 00:02:47,348
so Debra took the
kids to Connecticut,
59
00:02:47,416 --> 00:02:48,583
and I'm sleepin' at my mom's.
60
00:02:48,651 --> 00:02:50,384
Oh, my God. That
sounds like fun.
61
00:02:50,453 --> 00:02:51,786
Yeah. Well, it's been a while
62
00:02:51,854 --> 00:02:56,057
since I woke up covered
in vicks vaporub.
63
00:02:56,124 --> 00:02:57,459
Yeah, I hear that.
64
00:02:57,526 --> 00:02:59,193
Hey, you know what?
65
00:02:59,261 --> 00:03:01,162
Carrie's out with her
dad this whole weekend.
66
00:03:01,229 --> 00:03:03,098
She's gone. Why don't you
just crash at my place?
67
00:03:03,165 --> 00:03:04,215
It'll be fun.
68
00:03:04,283 --> 00:03:06,117
Yeah? Yeah!
69
00:03:06,184 --> 00:03:07,652
Think about it. Just
me and you, right?
70
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,854
No skirts givin' us the yap-yap.
Ha ha!
71
00:03:09,921 --> 00:03:11,756
Hey, you know what? Yeah.
72
00:03:11,824 --> 00:03:15,960
Yeah, yeah. Let me just ask my mom-tell.
I'm gonna...
73
00:03:18,147 --> 00:03:20,382
Hey, ma. Ma, listen,
a change of plans.
74
00:03:20,449 --> 00:03:23,485
I'm gonna sleep at my
friend Doug's house.
75
00:03:23,552 --> 00:03:27,555
No, this is not my way
of telling you I'm gay.
76
00:03:27,623 --> 00:03:30,258
I don't know how I
would tell you, ma.
77
00:03:30,326 --> 00:03:32,127
All right. I'm hangin' up.
I'm hangin' up, ma.
78
00:03:33,746 --> 00:03:35,246
That's the answering machine.
We're good. We're good.
79
00:03:35,314 --> 00:03:37,082
Ok. Yeah. Yeah.
80
00:03:40,152 --> 00:03:43,722
It's this way, just
past Ethel merman.
81
00:03:43,789 --> 00:03:46,625
Your mother is laid to rest
among Broadway royalty.
82
00:03:46,692 --> 00:03:49,878
Dad, that says "Ethel Melman."
83
00:03:49,945 --> 00:03:51,612
Wait, wait.
84
00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:54,382
You haven't seen your
mother in 20 years.
85
00:03:54,449 --> 00:03:57,986
I want her grave to
look ship-shape. Ok?
86
00:04:13,486 --> 00:04:15,887
Sophia, I'm sorry I'm late.
87
00:04:15,954 --> 00:04:18,590
I had a little dispute
with a toll taker
88
00:04:18,658 --> 00:04:20,392
over their "no pennies" policy.
89
00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:23,328
More about that later.
90
00:04:23,396 --> 00:04:24,529
I have a little surprise.
91
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,631
I brought your
daughter to see you.
92
00:04:29,034 --> 00:04:30,402
Hi, mom.
93
00:04:30,469 --> 00:04:33,938
Sorry it's taken me
so long to get here,
94
00:04:34,005 --> 00:04:35,540
but I want you to
know that I love you.
95
00:04:35,608 --> 00:04:37,342
Good stuff. Now, let's go.
96
00:04:37,409 --> 00:04:39,076
Dad, could you give me a minute?
97
00:04:41,430 --> 00:04:42,864
It's a beautiful stone, dad.
98
00:04:42,932 --> 00:04:44,032
Thank you.
99
00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:47,568
"Sophia Spooner, beloved
wife of Arthur,
100
00:04:47,636 --> 00:04:49,838
devoted mother to..."
101
00:04:49,905 --> 00:04:52,273
The flowers are
covering my name.
102
00:04:52,341 --> 00:04:54,142
Not everything's about you.
Let's go!
103
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,077
This place give me the creeps!
104
00:04:58,313 --> 00:05:00,831
"Devoted mother to...
105
00:05:00,899 --> 00:05:02,216
Simone?"
106
00:05:02,284 --> 00:05:04,369
I never noticed that.
107
00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:06,338
Must be a typo. Shall we?
108
00:05:06,405 --> 00:05:08,105
Dad, what-what's goin' on?
109
00:05:08,173 --> 00:05:10,007
Why isn't my name there?
110
00:05:12,144 --> 00:05:13,845
It's a long story, darling.
111
00:05:15,631 --> 00:05:18,382
You remember your cousin Simone?
112
00:05:18,450 --> 00:05:21,619
Cousin Simone is my sister?
113
00:05:21,687 --> 00:05:24,071
No, no. Nothing like that.
114
00:05:24,140 --> 00:05:25,406
You're Simone.
115
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:32,363
Up to you.
116
00:05:32,431 --> 00:05:33,748
Are you almost done, daddy?
117
00:05:33,816 --> 00:05:37,251
Uh, no, Simone. Daddy's
still playing.
118
00:05:37,319 --> 00:05:38,719
Are you winning?
119
00:05:38,787 --> 00:05:41,522
If you must know, I'm down $600.
120
00:05:41,589 --> 00:05:44,508
Oy.
121
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:47,178
Why don't you go play
with your cousin Carrie?
122
00:05:47,245 --> 00:05:49,180
Ok.
123
00:05:50,065 --> 00:05:52,483
Well, it's just you
and me, Chester.
124
00:05:52,551 --> 00:05:54,452
All right. All right.
125
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:58,823
I'm gonna raise you another 50.
126
00:05:58,890 --> 00:06:00,658
I don't have that much left.
127
00:06:00,726 --> 00:06:04,028
Hey, you're the big shot who wanted
to play for high stakes, Arthur.
128
00:06:04,096 --> 00:06:05,663
All right. All right. Uh...
129
00:06:05,731 --> 00:06:07,231
How about I give you
this wristwatch
130
00:06:07,299 --> 00:06:09,834
and the spare key to my
neighbor's house, huh?
131
00:06:09,902 --> 00:06:14,038
No, that's not gonna
cut it, Arthur.
132
00:06:14,106 --> 00:06:16,040
But you do have
something I want.
133
00:06:16,108 --> 00:06:17,108
What?
134
00:06:17,175 --> 00:06:18,576
Your daughter's name.
135
00:06:18,644 --> 00:06:20,778
You wanna play for "Simone"?!
136
00:06:20,846 --> 00:06:22,881
You knew we wanted that
name for our little girl!
137
00:06:22,948 --> 00:06:24,548
You stole it from us!
138
00:06:24,616 --> 00:06:27,718
Well, the premature
bird gets the worm!
139
00:06:27,786 --> 00:06:29,753
Are you in, or you out?
140
00:06:38,697 --> 00:06:41,933
You lost my name
in a poker game?!
141
00:06:42,001 --> 00:06:43,835
I had a straight to the ace.
142
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:47,739
That he pulled a
flush is unheard of!
143
00:06:56,832 --> 00:07:00,384
Ha! I love the
wallpaper guy, man.
144
00:07:00,452 --> 00:07:02,603
Always yellin' at the plumber.
145
00:07:02,671 --> 00:07:05,973
You know, it would be cool if
they had a nail-gun fight.
146
00:07:06,041 --> 00:07:08,709
That plumber would
beat him senseless.
147
00:07:08,777 --> 00:07:11,429
I don't know, man.
Wallpaper guy's tough.
148
00:07:11,497 --> 00:07:13,748
Yeah, but that plumber,
he's got, like, crazy eyes.
149
00:07:13,815 --> 00:07:15,750
You know, he's like this.
150
00:07:15,817 --> 00:07:18,419
Uh-ha ha. Easy. Yeah, take-
151
00:07:18,486 --> 00:07:21,272
now let's put that
cheerleading thing back on.
152
00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:23,641
It's over. Midland, Texas won.
153
00:07:23,709 --> 00:07:25,576
What?! Oh, see? That's
why I stopped bettin'.
154
00:07:25,644 --> 00:07:26,577
It's all fixed.
155
00:07:30,248 --> 00:07:31,181
Uh...
156
00:07:32,751 --> 00:07:36,587
I gotta say, man, this is...
this is pretty lame.
157
00:07:37,940 --> 00:07:39,173
What?
158
00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,376
Well... Look at us.
159
00:07:42,444 --> 00:07:44,612
It's Saturday night. Uhh.
160
00:07:44,679 --> 00:07:45,679
Our wives are out of town,
161
00:07:45,747 --> 00:07:47,415
and this is the best
we come up with?
162
00:07:48,317 --> 00:07:50,334
You want me to go home?
163
00:07:51,686 --> 00:07:52,886
No! No. Let's just-
164
00:07:52,955 --> 00:07:54,822
let's shake it up a little bit.
165
00:07:54,889 --> 00:07:57,330
All right. All right. Well,
you wanna get a pizza?
166
00:07:57,355 --> 00:07:58,039
No!
167
00:08:00,128 --> 00:08:02,563
Yes, I do, but not-
that's not the point.
168
00:08:05,266 --> 00:08:05,983
Well, what?
169
00:08:06,135 --> 00:08:07,268
I jus-
170
00:08:08,286 --> 00:08:09,353
before I was with Carrie,
171
00:08:09,421 --> 00:08:11,555
I... I used-I did
whatever I wanted to do.
172
00:08:11,623 --> 00:08:13,457
You know? I was
like a wild bull.
173
00:08:14,627 --> 00:08:15,593
Yeah, I can see that.
174
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,211
Yeah.
175
00:08:17,279 --> 00:08:18,646
Let's do that tonight. Let's...
176
00:08:18,713 --> 00:08:20,114
Let's be wild bulls.
177
00:08:20,182 --> 00:08:22,984
All right! All right.
I can do wild bull.
178
00:08:23,051 --> 00:08:25,153
What... what... what
do wild bulls do?
179
00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:27,538
Well... Carrie doesn't like
it when I make a mess,
180
00:08:27,606 --> 00:08:30,675
but you can't tell a
bull not to make a mess!
181
00:08:30,742 --> 00:08:32,093
Yeeeaaahhh!
182
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:33,661
Ooowwww!
183
00:08:36,498 --> 00:08:39,033
W- we got any more cheetos?
184
00:08:41,654 --> 00:08:43,254
No. I shouldn't have done that.
185
00:08:51,830 --> 00:08:54,682
I don't understand why you're
making such a big deal outta this.
186
00:08:54,749 --> 00:08:57,451
Dad... if it's not
such a big deal,
187
00:08:57,519 --> 00:09:00,954
then why did mom have you put
"Simone" on her tombstone?
188
00:09:01,022 --> 00:09:02,440
She never forgave
me for losing it.
189
00:09:02,508 --> 00:09:04,776
Even in death, she was petty.
190
00:09:04,843 --> 00:09:07,561
You know what, dad? I have
put up with your craziness
191
00:09:07,629 --> 00:09:09,130
my whole life.
192
00:09:09,198 --> 00:09:12,300
You have ruined relationships
for me, cost me jobs.
193
00:09:12,368 --> 00:09:13,901
You even spent my
college tuition
194
00:09:13,969 --> 00:09:16,137
on buying the rights to
the Lou rawls story.
195
00:09:16,205 --> 00:09:18,005
That story needs to be
told, and it will be!
196
00:09:18,073 --> 00:09:19,006
Ohhh...
197
00:09:20,075 --> 00:09:22,743
Darling... It's just a name.
198
00:09:22,810 --> 00:09:25,145
Dad, it is not just a name. Ok?
199
00:09:25,214 --> 00:09:28,316
It's important. It-it
defines who you are,
200
00:09:28,383 --> 00:09:30,384
how people treat you.
201
00:09:30,452 --> 00:09:32,636
I mean, if I'd been Simone, I...
202
00:09:32,704 --> 00:09:36,808
Maybe I would've had a whole,
different, better life.
203
00:09:36,875 --> 00:09:38,910
But we'll never know, will we?
204
00:09:39,711 --> 00:09:41,228
The man drew a flush. Ohhh!
205
00:09:46,084 --> 00:09:48,318
Hey, the car show's in town.
206
00:09:48,386 --> 00:09:49,319
Nah.
207
00:09:50,555 --> 00:09:53,157
Ooh! Stutterin' John's in rent.
208
00:09:54,459 --> 00:09:56,677
No, no, no, no.
209
00:09:56,745 --> 00:09:59,013
Hey, we could go see
that penguin movie.
210
00:10:04,235 --> 00:10:06,671
All right, well, I mean, there's
gotta be somethin' we can do.
211
00:10:08,239 --> 00:10:09,807
Check this out.
212
00:10:09,874 --> 00:10:12,643
Why don't we party with the beautiful
people at the lightning lounge?
213
00:10:12,711 --> 00:10:14,344
Hey, hey, what was wrong
with rock and bowl?
214
00:10:14,412 --> 00:10:15,680
"Free shoe rental."
215
00:10:15,747 --> 00:10:17,381
Would-come on!
216
00:10:17,448 --> 00:10:19,516
Tonight's about takin'
our manhood back!
217
00:10:19,584 --> 00:10:21,118
I say we do this club thing.
218
00:10:21,186 --> 00:10:22,937
No, no. I don't know
about goin' to a club.
219
00:10:23,005 --> 00:10:24,822
Come on. I mean,
we-we're married men.
220
00:10:24,890 --> 00:10:26,523
We're not goin' there
to pick up women.
221
00:10:26,591 --> 00:10:28,159
This is a guys' night out, man!
222
00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:30,594
Come on, we're wild bulls!
Now, let's do this.
223
00:10:30,662 --> 00:10:31,879
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
224
00:10:31,947 --> 00:10:35,783
Are you gonna go like that?
You're wearin' sweats.
225
00:10:35,850 --> 00:10:38,202
Ok, first of all, these
are easy-fit pants.
226
00:10:39,370 --> 00:10:41,906
And you should talk. You
look like Bob vila.
227
00:11:27,002 --> 00:11:28,702
Maybe I should just go home.
228
00:11:44,086 --> 00:11:46,070
Simone! Simone!
229
00:11:46,138 --> 00:11:47,821
Yeah! Simone!
230
00:11:47,889 --> 00:11:50,057
Simone!
231
00:11:50,124 --> 00:11:51,642
Over here!
232
00:11:51,710 --> 00:11:54,378
We love you, Simone! Simone!
233
00:11:54,446 --> 00:11:55,947
Simone! We love you!
234
00:11:56,014 --> 00:11:58,449
Oh, and I love you.
235
00:12:01,703 --> 00:12:03,204
Where to, miss Simone?
236
00:12:03,271 --> 00:12:06,807
Uh... I guess Brad
and Angelina's.
237
00:12:06,825 --> 00:12:08,542
But I'm not singin'.
238
00:12:08,609 --> 00:12:09,593
Very good.
239
00:12:09,661 --> 00:12:11,195
You know, I may be
a tad out of line
240
00:12:11,263 --> 00:12:13,597
sayin' this, but you
look absolutely...
241
00:12:20,255 --> 00:12:21,605
Hey, Doug, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
242
00:12:21,673 --> 00:12:23,274
I just thought of somethin'.
What's up?
243
00:12:23,342 --> 00:12:25,292
We look pretty good here, right?
244
00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:27,027
I look great. Exactly.
245
00:12:27,095 --> 00:12:29,413
And we're successful.
We smell good.
246
00:12:29,481 --> 00:12:31,048
Even though we're
not interested,
247
00:12:31,115 --> 00:12:33,283
there's a good chance that
some of these ladies...
248
00:12:33,351 --> 00:12:36,253
Are gonna throw
themselves at us.
249
00:12:36,321 --> 00:12:38,555
Oh, my God. I never thought of that.
Yeah.
250
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:40,474
You know what? We should come up
251
00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:41,809
with some kind of code word.
252
00:12:41,877 --> 00:12:42,810
For what?
253
00:12:42,878 --> 00:12:44,745
In case things get outta hand.
254
00:12:44,813 --> 00:12:46,297
Oh. You-oh, you mean like if...
255
00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:48,065
This chick's all over me
or somethin' like that,
256
00:12:48,133 --> 00:12:49,634
and I need you to bail me out?
257
00:12:49,701 --> 00:12:51,235
I just say the code word?
Exactly.
258
00:12:51,303 --> 00:12:53,471
Ok. Exactly. What do you
want the code word to be?
259
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:54,805
How about "kettle corn"?
260
00:12:56,958 --> 00:12:58,308
"Kettle corn"?
261
00:12:58,376 --> 00:12:59,510
Yeah. What's wrong
with "kettle corn"?
262
00:12:59,578 --> 00:13:00,761
Well, it's just-
it's not organic.
263
00:13:00,829 --> 00:13:03,297
It doesn't come up in a
sentence very often.
264
00:13:03,364 --> 00:13:05,116
It does for me.
265
00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:06,784
People, you cannot stand here.
266
00:13:06,851 --> 00:13:08,152
Please move inside.
267
00:13:10,055 --> 00:13:11,656
Let's do this. Wild bulls.
268
00:13:30,926 --> 00:13:33,193
Yes.
269
00:13:35,097 --> 00:13:36,697
Ahem. Hello.
270
00:13:36,765 --> 00:13:39,266
Hi. Hello there. Hello.
271
00:13:41,420 --> 00:13:43,120
It's "kettle corn," though, right?
Yeah, it's "kettle corn."
272
00:13:43,188 --> 00:13:44,522
Ok. Yeah. Yeah.
273
00:13:52,431 --> 00:13:53,447
What are you doin'?
274
00:13:53,598 --> 00:13:54,698
I'm goin' out.
275
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:57,968
It's 2:00 in the morning.
Where you goin'?
276
00:13:58,036 --> 00:13:59,437
To Uncle Chester's.
277
00:13:59,504 --> 00:14:01,138
To win your name back.
278
00:14:01,940 --> 00:14:03,324
Oh, my, that's crazy.
279
00:14:03,391 --> 00:14:04,808
You're happy with your life?
280
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:06,560
Schlepping coffee
for suits by day
281
00:14:06,627 --> 00:14:08,895
and folding giant
underwear by night?
282
00:14:12,034 --> 00:14:13,551
'Cause as long as you're Carrie,
283
00:14:13,619 --> 00:14:15,085
that's all you're gonna get.
284
00:14:15,153 --> 00:14:16,904
Dad, come on. Just
go back to bed.
285
00:14:16,972 --> 00:14:18,472
You were right.
286
00:14:18,540 --> 00:14:21,408
As Simone, you could've
had a better life.
287
00:14:21,476 --> 00:14:24,345
You could've been an astronaut or a...
an inventor.
288
00:14:24,412 --> 00:14:25,679
Or a movie star?
289
00:14:25,746 --> 00:14:26,413
Yes.
290
00:14:26,481 --> 00:14:27,731
I'll call you a cab.
291
00:14:39,311 --> 00:14:40,444
Ahh...
292
00:14:42,414 --> 00:14:44,932
Guess we didn't really
need a code word, huh?
293
00:14:46,167 --> 00:14:47,267
Yeah, that's surprisin'.
294
00:14:47,336 --> 00:14:49,203
Usually the sound of
a guy suckin' ice
295
00:14:49,270 --> 00:14:50,938
drives women wild.
296
00:14:51,005 --> 00:14:53,173
Hey, I paid 15 bucks
for this drink. Ok?
297
00:14:53,241 --> 00:14:55,943
If I want to eat the
glass, I'll do that.
298
00:14:56,010 --> 00:14:57,878
And you with your
up-nods and smilin'.
299
00:14:57,946 --> 00:14:59,714
"Like that was workin'." Hey,
everybody, look at me.
300
00:14:59,781 --> 00:15:01,281
"Look at my receding gums.
301
00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:04,418
"Hey, horse teeth. Horse teeth.
Horse teeth.
302
00:15:04,486 --> 00:15:06,053
Big choppers."
303
00:15:07,689 --> 00:15:09,356
Yeah, well...
304
00:15:10,525 --> 00:15:12,292
I'm sure nobody saw my mouth
305
00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:14,194
because luckily I'm
sittin' next to a guy
306
00:15:14,262 --> 00:15:17,297
who looks like he ate the
guy sittin' next to him.
307
00:15:17,365 --> 00:15:18,465
Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
308
00:15:21,035 --> 00:15:22,369
Let me tell you somethin', man.
309
00:15:22,437 --> 00:15:24,004
If I was single, I
would stomp you
310
00:15:24,071 --> 00:15:25,238
in the chick department. Ohhh...
311
00:15:25,306 --> 00:15:26,940
Boy. What do you-you-you think
312
00:15:27,008 --> 00:15:28,642
you got more game than me?
Really?
313
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:29,943
I know I do. Oh, yeah.
314
00:15:30,011 --> 00:15:31,311
That's funny. That is funny.
315
00:15:31,379 --> 00:15:32,813
Yeah. All right.
316
00:15:34,215 --> 00:15:36,483
How about a-a little wager?
317
00:15:36,551 --> 00:15:37,484
I'm in.
318
00:15:37,552 --> 00:15:38,819
Ok. All right.
319
00:15:38,887 --> 00:15:40,421
All right, how about this? $100,
320
00:15:40,488 --> 00:15:42,756
first one who get somebody
to dance with him.
321
00:15:42,824 --> 00:15:44,792
Literally the easiest
hundred bucks
322
00:15:44,859 --> 00:15:47,093
I've ever made in my life.
Yeah? All right.
323
00:15:47,829 --> 00:15:48,980
Ahem. Ok.
324
00:15:50,048 --> 00:15:51,715
'Scuse me. Would you, uh...
325
00:15:51,783 --> 00:15:52,883
Would you like to dance?
326
00:15:52,951 --> 00:15:53,985
No, thanks.
327
00:15:54,052 --> 00:15:54,986
How 'bout you?
328
00:15:56,254 --> 00:15:56,937
You?
329
00:15:57,004 --> 00:15:58,022
You.
330
00:16:00,892 --> 00:16:02,326
Hi. Excuse me for a second.
Would. - no.
331
00:16:02,394 --> 00:16:03,661
Woul-
332
00:16:03,728 --> 00:16:05,162
you don't even know
what I was gonna say.
333
00:16:05,230 --> 00:16:08,031
I have money, and I'm dying. Ok?
334
00:16:10,134 --> 00:16:12,503
Oh, my God! This is
totally my song!
335
00:16:12,571 --> 00:16:14,338
Oh, my God. It's
totally my song, too.
336
00:16:14,406 --> 00:16:15,472
You want to dance?
337
00:16:15,540 --> 00:16:17,708
Ahem. You're up now.
I'm on deck.
338
00:16:19,411 --> 00:16:22,179
She's great. She's so great.
She's great.
339
00:16:22,247 --> 00:16:24,298
Excuse me. Do you know
where the bathroom is?
340
00:16:24,365 --> 00:16:26,200
Yeah. Yeah, I do. It's right
up there to the right.
341
00:16:26,267 --> 00:16:27,501
Yeah. Yeah. It's over this way.
I'll show you.
342
00:16:27,569 --> 00:16:28,535
Yeah.
343
00:16:41,449 --> 00:16:43,717
Hey. Pay up, man. Pay up.
344
00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:45,385
All right. Pay up.
345
00:16:45,453 --> 00:16:47,220
First of all, does she even
know she's dancin' with you?
346
00:16:47,288 --> 00:16:48,455
Oh. I think she knows.
347
00:16:48,523 --> 00:16:49,523
Yeah. Ok?
348
00:16:49,591 --> 00:16:51,041
She's makin' out with that guy.
349
00:16:52,944 --> 00:16:55,713
That's 'cause I told her to.
It turns me on. Ok?
350
00:16:55,781 --> 00:16:56,980
All right, look,
here's the rule.
351
00:16:57,048 --> 00:16:59,016
It's gotta be someone who's
not already dancin',
352
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:02,419
someone starting from a
standing or neutral position.
353
00:17:02,486 --> 00:17:04,054
Let's do it. All right.
Let's go.
354
00:17:04,122 --> 00:17:04,705
Uh...
355
00:17:09,060 --> 00:17:09,826
Oh, yeah.
356
00:17:13,715 --> 00:17:15,566
Um, will you dance with me real.
- really quick?
357
00:17:15,634 --> 00:17:16,567
Oh, no, thanks.
358
00:17:16,635 --> 00:17:18,101
How about I give you 50 bucks?
359
00:17:18,169 --> 00:17:19,002
What? Yeah.
360
00:17:19,070 --> 00:17:20,087
What's goin' on here?
361
00:17:20,155 --> 00:17:21,004
No, no, no. Nothin'. Nothin'.
362
00:17:21,072 --> 00:17:22,089
I just wanted her
to dance with me
363
00:17:22,157 --> 00:17:23,090
just for one second.
364
00:17:23,158 --> 00:17:24,892
He said he'd give me $50.
365
00:17:24,959 --> 00:17:26,643
You think she's a hooker?
366
00:17:26,711 --> 00:17:27,861
No! No, no, no. All
right, listen.
367
00:17:27,928 --> 00:17:29,196
Forget about that. Forget about it.
How about
368
00:17:29,264 --> 00:17:30,531
I give you 50 bucks,
you dance with me?
369
00:17:30,598 --> 00:17:33,300
How about I kick
your ass, old man?
370
00:17:34,051 --> 00:17:35,268
Kettle corn!
371
00:17:43,178 --> 00:17:44,111
So?
372
00:17:49,684 --> 00:17:51,118
You know what? It's ok, dad.
373
00:17:51,186 --> 00:17:53,620
You tried. That's the
important thing.
374
00:17:53,688 --> 00:17:55,889
Besides, you know,
I like my life.
375
00:17:55,957 --> 00:17:57,441
Have a great husband...
376
00:17:57,509 --> 00:17:59,176
Crazy dad who loves me.
377
00:17:59,243 --> 00:18:00,277
Hmmhh.
378
00:18:00,345 --> 00:18:02,979
I like being Carrie.
379
00:18:03,047 --> 00:18:04,297
About that...
380
00:18:07,101 --> 00:18:08,618
Oh, my God.
381
00:18:08,686 --> 00:18:11,621
Did you lose the name "Carrie"?!
382
00:18:11,689 --> 00:18:13,207
I prefer to think of it
383
00:18:13,274 --> 00:18:15,509
as winning you the name "midge."
384
00:18:19,214 --> 00:18:20,647
Hey, I kettle-corned you, man!
385
00:18:20,665 --> 00:18:21,881
Excuse me.
386
00:18:21,949 --> 00:18:22,800
Raven and I are
waitin' for a song
387
00:18:22,867 --> 00:18:24,968
to dance to. You stupid idiot.
388
00:18:25,036 --> 00:18:26,637
Will you help me out?
This guy's gonna kill me.
389
00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:28,288
What are you talkin' about?
390
00:18:28,355 --> 00:18:29,807
I hit on his girlfriend...
391
00:18:29,874 --> 00:18:31,475
And then kinda on him.
392
00:18:33,144 --> 00:18:35,262
Give him a little attitude.
He'll back right down.
393
00:18:35,329 --> 00:18:36,280
Whassup, man? Get down! Stop it!
394
00:18:36,347 --> 00:18:37,548
You're makin' it worse!
395
00:18:37,615 --> 00:18:38,565
You stop, man.
There's two of us.
396
00:18:38,716 --> 00:18:39,783
There's one of him.
What do you want to do,
397
00:18:39,850 --> 00:18:40,884
run out of here
like little girls?
398
00:18:40,951 --> 00:18:42,452
Crawl out the bathroom window?
399
00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:43,837
Yeah! That-yes! The bathroom!
400
00:18:43,905 --> 00:18:45,672
Would you stop it?
401
00:18:45,740 --> 00:18:49,793
Come on, now, man! You're
a wild bull, right?!
402
00:18:49,861 --> 00:18:51,511
I'm 45, and I'm trembling.
403
00:18:53,014 --> 00:18:54,097
No. Come on, man.
404
00:18:54,165 --> 00:18:56,149
We're wild bulls.
You're a wild bull!
405
00:18:56,217 --> 00:18:57,217
Yeah. Right?
406
00:18:57,285 --> 00:18:58,552
Yeah. I'm a wild bull.
Wild bull.
407
00:18:58,620 --> 00:19:00,287
Right! Now, gimme
some crazy eyes.
408
00:19:09,197 --> 00:19:11,682
That karate's
somethin' else, huh?
409
00:19:13,651 --> 00:19:14,884
Yeah. It's bad news.
410
00:19:14,952 --> 00:19:16,654
Yeah.
411
00:19:16,754 --> 00:19:18,522
Did you find your tooth?
412
00:19:22,777 --> 00:19:24,711
They told me they'd call.
413
00:19:24,779 --> 00:19:28,432
What do you think that
guy was on parole for?
414
00:19:28,499 --> 00:19:32,703
Whatever it was, he's gotta
add sexual assault now.
415
00:19:53,861 --> 00:19:55,461
So, the code word's
"fiddle-faddle," right?
416
00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:56,753
"Fiddle-faddle." Right.
29512
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