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1
00:00:14,136 --> 00:00:15,168
Hey, hon, come on.
2
00:00:15,237 --> 00:00:16,437
It's almost 8:00. My show's on.
3
00:00:16,505 --> 00:00:19,674
Un-un-uh, there'll be
no boob tube tonight.
4
00:00:19,742 --> 00:00:20,874
Wow, Battleship.
5
00:00:20,941 --> 00:00:22,076
Where'd you dig this out from?
6
00:00:22,144 --> 00:00:23,277
Well, I was in the attic
7
00:00:23,344 --> 00:00:24,378
looking for Twister,
8
00:00:24,445 --> 00:00:26,079
which I was hoping we
could play naked...
9
00:00:27,649 --> 00:00:29,948
and I stumbled upon this,
10
00:00:30,016 --> 00:00:31,950
which we could also play naked.
11
00:00:32,987 --> 00:00:35,021
Um, don't think I
wanna play naked.
12
00:00:35,089 --> 00:00:37,056
How about no shirts?
13
00:00:39,759 --> 00:00:41,460
OK, fair enough.
14
00:00:41,528 --> 00:00:42,595
Let's get cracking. Come on.
15
00:00:42,663 --> 00:00:43,796
All right, well,
I gotta warn ya,
16
00:00:43,864 --> 00:00:44,930
I used to rock at this game.
17
00:00:44,998 --> 00:00:46,565
Yeah, you better pack a
swimsuit, sweetheart.
18
00:00:46,633 --> 00:00:47,633
You're going down.
19
00:00:47,700 --> 00:00:50,001
Yeah, OK, bring it.
20
00:00:50,069 --> 00:00:51,169
All right, it's all you.
21
00:00:51,237 --> 00:00:52,202
All right, here we go.
22
00:00:52,270 --> 00:00:53,271
B-5.
23
00:00:53,338 --> 00:00:55,173
Miss. C-7.
24
00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:57,141
Miss. E-2.
25
00:00:57,243 --> 00:00:58,944
Miss.
26
00:00:59,012 --> 00:01:00,044
E-7.
27
00:01:00,112 --> 00:01:02,212
Miss. E-2.
28
00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:06,149
Miss. A-9.
29
00:01:06,217 --> 00:01:08,452
Miss. F-1.
30
00:01:10,055 --> 00:01:11,221
Miss.
31
00:01:14,425 --> 00:01:15,391
TV now.
32
00:01:15,459 --> 00:01:16,559
Yeah.
33
00:01:59,298 --> 00:02:00,899
Excuse me.
34
00:02:00,967 --> 00:02:03,569
Where's your Raymond
Burr section?
35
00:02:03,636 --> 00:02:05,337
Um, we don't have one.
36
00:02:05,405 --> 00:02:07,907
Uh, what's the title of the
movie you're looking for?
37
00:02:07,974 --> 00:02:09,041
I'm not sure,
38
00:02:09,108 --> 00:02:11,577
but there's a wonderful
scene on an airplane,
39
00:02:11,645 --> 00:02:15,146
and early in the picture,
the hero mails a letter.
40
00:02:15,214 --> 00:02:18,550
It was about, uh, yea big.
41
00:02:18,617 --> 00:02:20,284
And it was with Raymond Burr?
42
00:02:20,352 --> 00:02:22,253
Possibly.
43
00:02:23,989 --> 00:02:26,391
OK, I got 7 excellent choices.
44
00:02:26,458 --> 00:02:28,191
You pick any one you want.
45
00:02:28,259 --> 00:02:32,194
OK, more than half of
these involve Chucky.
46
00:02:32,262 --> 00:02:34,663
I'll take that as a polite pass.
47
00:02:34,731 --> 00:02:36,599
OK, and no, no, and no.
48
00:02:36,666 --> 00:02:38,934
Come on, these are all
stupid guy movies.
49
00:02:39,002 --> 00:02:41,136
Uh, I think you owe an apology
50
00:02:41,204 --> 00:02:43,706
to miss Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.
51
00:02:43,774 --> 00:02:46,041
No, I saw the trailer.
It looks stupid.
52
00:02:46,109 --> 00:02:49,310
Hmm, sounds like someone
wishes she were raiding tombs.
53
00:02:49,378 --> 00:02:51,413
Doug, tonight, I want
to see a romantic movie
54
00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:53,314
about 2 people who fall in love.
55
00:02:53,382 --> 00:02:55,917
Well, then how about
Lethal Weapon?
56
00:02:55,984 --> 00:02:57,452
What, these guys
weren't in love?
57
00:02:57,520 --> 00:02:59,454
All right, Doug, put 'em back.
Come on, Carrie.
58
00:02:59,522 --> 00:03:01,489
It's not happening. Let it go.
59
00:03:01,557 --> 00:03:02,723
Well, I found our picture,
60
00:03:02,791 --> 00:03:05,125
Raymond Burr in
Destination: Istanbul.
61
00:03:05,192 --> 00:03:06,192
No, Dad, tonight, I wanna...
62
00:03:06,260 --> 00:03:07,493
According to Leonard Maltin,
63
00:03:07,561 --> 00:03:09,429
it's Burr's finest role!
64
00:03:09,496 --> 00:03:10,798
Fine.
65
00:03:28,147 --> 00:03:30,615
Hey, Deac, you ever
have the whole backside
66
00:03:30,683 --> 00:03:35,086
of both thighs go
completely numb?
67
00:03:35,153 --> 00:03:36,655
No.
68
00:03:36,722 --> 00:03:37,855
Huh.
69
00:03:39,858 --> 00:03:40,991
I wouldn't worry about it
70
00:03:41,059 --> 00:03:42,693
unless it's happening a lot.
71
00:03:42,727 --> 00:03:43,928
No, no, no, no, no.
72
00:03:46,330 --> 00:03:48,297
What would you consider a lot?
73
00:03:48,365 --> 00:03:49,399
Shh, shh, shh!
74
00:03:49,401 --> 00:03:50,433
Hey, we're talking here.
75
00:03:50,501 --> 00:03:51,502
I wanna hear this.
I wanna hear this.
76
00:03:51,569 --> 00:03:54,204
Man: Deep in the
forest of no trees,
77
00:03:54,272 --> 00:03:57,472
on the first day of
the eternal equinox,
78
00:03:57,540 --> 00:04:00,310
a child is born who
will ask the question
79
00:04:00,377 --> 00:04:04,914
that will change the course
of Grünian history forever.
80
00:04:04,981 --> 00:04:07,582
Child: Why must we
live in darkness?
81
00:04:07,650 --> 00:04:09,151
Man: The Warriors of
Grün, Chapter One,
82
00:04:09,219 --> 00:04:11,787
opens next Friday at
a theater near you.
83
00:04:11,855 --> 00:04:14,388
Oh, my God!
84
00:04:14,456 --> 00:04:15,957
We are so there!
85
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:22,096
Couldn't be more not there.
86
00:04:22,163 --> 00:04:24,999
You never read the
Trilogy of Grün?
87
00:04:25,066 --> 00:04:26,300
It's a... It's a classic.
88
00:04:26,368 --> 00:04:29,702
It's been translated into,
like, 50 different languages.
89
00:04:29,770 --> 00:04:32,706
He was doing so well.
90
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:33,673
He has a girlfriend,
91
00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:34,773
started dressing better,
92
00:04:34,842 --> 00:04:37,144
and now this.
93
00:04:37,211 --> 00:04:38,544
This movie's gonna be huge,
94
00:04:38,679 --> 00:04:40,212
and I'm gonna be
at the first show
95
00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:42,314
if I have to camp
out for a week.
96
00:04:42,381 --> 00:04:45,818
Have you ever actually
met this girlfriend?
97
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:48,754
Hey, guys.
98
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,623
Hey! Hey! Honey...
99
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:52,625
would you do me a favor
and unload these for me?
100
00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:53,725
I'm gonna go change.
101
00:04:53,792 --> 00:04:54,959
What'd you get for dinner?
102
00:04:55,027 --> 00:04:56,861
Uh, some salad fixin's
103
00:04:56,929 --> 00:04:58,362
and a nice piece of halibut.
104
00:04:58,430 --> 00:04:59,430
Halibut?
105
00:04:59,498 --> 00:05:01,232
Yeah, my dad wanted it.
It's good.
106
00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:05,737
Yeah, it's the ocean's
answer to pork chops.
107
00:05:05,804 --> 00:05:07,171
This is so annoying.
108
00:05:07,238 --> 00:05:08,405
What?
109
00:05:08,472 --> 00:05:11,108
Carrie doesn't listen
to me about anything.
110
00:05:11,176 --> 00:05:12,942
This morning, I told her 5
things I wanted for dinner,
111
00:05:13,010 --> 00:05:15,277
but Arthur wanted halibut,
bam, we get halibut,
112
00:05:15,345 --> 00:05:17,847
and then last night, I wanted
to rent Lethal Weapon,
113
00:05:17,915 --> 00:05:20,016
but no, Arthur wanted
to get something else.
114
00:05:20,083 --> 00:05:22,384
So we gotta spend 2 hours
watching some fat guy
115
00:05:22,452 --> 00:05:24,186
chasing his own
letter to Istanbul.
116
00:05:24,254 --> 00:05:26,521
It's so unfair.
117
00:05:26,589 --> 00:05:28,857
You sound like my kid.
118
00:05:28,925 --> 00:05:30,391
What do you mean?
119
00:05:30,459 --> 00:05:31,627
Well, he always complains
that his little brother
120
00:05:31,695 --> 00:05:33,161
gets his own way all the time,
121
00:05:33,228 --> 00:05:34,629
so you know what
he started doing?
122
00:05:34,697 --> 00:05:35,763
He started tricking
the little guy
123
00:05:35,830 --> 00:05:37,932
into asking for the
stuff he really wants.
124
00:05:37,999 --> 00:05:39,833
Now I got a 4-year-old
hitting me up
125
00:05:39,901 --> 00:05:41,702
for a Victoria's
Secret calendar.
126
00:05:48,443 --> 00:05:49,877
Arthur!
127
00:05:58,252 --> 00:05:59,252
Hello, Douglas.
128
00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,421
King Arthur, how goes it?
129
00:06:01,487 --> 00:06:03,056
Did Carrie get me my fish?
130
00:06:03,124 --> 00:06:04,223
Uh, yeah, I think so.
131
00:06:04,291 --> 00:06:06,993
Ah, halibut, very healthy
for the prostate.
132
00:06:07,060 --> 00:06:09,828
If I had one, it would be
lubed to a fare-thee-well.
133
00:06:11,497 --> 00:06:12,964
Yeah.
134
00:06:13,033 --> 00:06:14,598
Uh, you know, you
haven't told me
135
00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,534
any of your World War II
stories in a long time.
136
00:06:16,601 --> 00:06:17,769
You were over in Italy, right?
137
00:06:17,837 --> 00:06:19,604
Uh-huh.
138
00:06:19,672 --> 00:06:22,840
I actually have a photo taken
of myself with Mussolini.
139
00:06:22,908 --> 00:06:25,642
He's upside down, of course.
140
00:06:25,709 --> 00:06:26,811
Oh, yeah.
141
00:06:26,879 --> 00:06:28,145
That must have been
pretty wild, though, huh?
142
00:06:28,212 --> 00:06:29,646
I mean, gosh, being over there,
143
00:06:29,713 --> 00:06:32,649
all the history, the art...
144
00:06:32,717 --> 00:06:34,484
the pizza.
145
00:06:34,551 --> 00:06:37,019
The hookers weren't
too shabby, either.
146
00:06:38,554 --> 00:06:40,656
I bet you they
weren't too shabby,
147
00:06:40,724 --> 00:06:42,658
now, but back to the pizza.
148
00:06:42,726 --> 00:06:45,393
Actually, I remember the
night before our assault
149
00:06:45,461 --> 00:06:47,629
on the German stronghold
in Montecasino.
150
00:06:47,697 --> 00:06:50,031
We were just expecting
our usual K rations,
151
00:06:50,099 --> 00:06:51,966
but then this little
baker showed up
152
00:06:52,001 --> 00:06:55,303
with a wagon full of
freshly baked pizza pies.
153
00:06:55,371 --> 00:06:57,839
Mmm, I bet you they
tasted pretty good, huh?
154
00:06:57,907 --> 00:06:59,273
Oh, did they ever.
155
00:06:59,341 --> 00:07:03,043
When I bit into that warm,
crispy slice of heaven,
156
00:07:03,111 --> 00:07:04,678
it was like...
157
00:07:04,745 --> 00:07:07,682
Like all the misery
and horror of war
158
00:07:07,749 --> 00:07:09,851
just suddenly disappeared?
159
00:07:09,919 --> 00:07:11,985
Yes.
160
00:07:12,053 --> 00:07:13,353
Hi, Dad.
161
00:07:14,622 --> 00:07:16,022
I want pizza!
162
00:07:19,425 --> 00:07:21,894
It's OK with me. I don't care.
163
00:07:34,007 --> 00:07:35,406
I want cheese steaks!
164
00:07:44,149 --> 00:07:46,851
I want to try the new Chinese
place down the block!
165
00:07:51,222 --> 00:07:53,122
I want Bose speakers in our car!
166
00:07:58,662 --> 00:08:01,197
I want fried chicken...
167
00:08:03,633 --> 00:08:05,301
and waffles.
168
00:08:13,843 --> 00:08:15,877
I wanna watch Crank Yankers!
169
00:08:26,888 --> 00:08:29,257
Oh, yeah.
170
00:08:29,324 --> 00:08:30,724
Warriors of Grün, huh?
171
00:08:30,792 --> 00:08:32,726
3 days and counting, am I right?
172
00:08:32,794 --> 00:08:33,894
Yeah.
173
00:08:35,897 --> 00:08:37,264
Is this the line?
174
00:08:37,331 --> 00:08:40,400
No, that's the line for the movie
that starts in 10 minutes.
175
00:08:40,467 --> 00:08:43,102
So I'm... I'm first in line?
176
00:08:43,169 --> 00:08:44,737
Oh, sweet!
177
00:08:54,948 --> 00:08:57,749
Hello, Dark Lord of Grün.
178
00:08:57,816 --> 00:09:00,618
Your faithful servant is first.
179
00:09:11,396 --> 00:09:12,862
Hey.
180
00:09:12,930 --> 00:09:15,466
Darling, question for you.
181
00:09:15,533 --> 00:09:18,468
Do you find me
sexually attractive?
182
00:09:28,011 --> 00:09:31,713
Well, Dad.
183
00:09:31,781 --> 00:09:33,548
Yes, I know you're my daughter.
184
00:09:33,615 --> 00:09:35,850
Can't you put that
aside for one moment
185
00:09:35,918 --> 00:09:37,718
and answer a simple question,
186
00:09:37,786 --> 00:09:39,687
am I sexy?
187
00:09:39,755 --> 00:09:41,322
No, I can't!
188
00:09:41,390 --> 00:09:43,124
Why are we even
talking about this?
189
00:09:43,192 --> 00:09:45,026
Well, usually, when I go
to the Senior Center,
190
00:09:45,094 --> 00:09:47,095
I get quite a few admiring
glances from the ladies,
191
00:09:47,163 --> 00:09:48,628
but today, zippo.
192
00:09:48,696 --> 00:09:50,998
Even in the pale
blue sweat suit?
193
00:09:51,065 --> 00:09:53,633
I was surprised, too.
194
00:09:53,701 --> 00:09:54,968
So just tell me.
195
00:09:55,035 --> 00:09:56,670
Have I gotten heavier?
196
00:09:56,736 --> 00:09:57,938
You look fine.
197
00:09:58,006 --> 00:09:59,372
No, I put on weight.
198
00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,108
How can I not have with all the
junk I've been eating lately?
199
00:10:02,177 --> 00:10:04,377
So why don't you just
eat a little better?
200
00:10:04,445 --> 00:10:05,611
Funny, I always intend to,
201
00:10:05,679 --> 00:10:07,879
but then Douglas starts talking
to me about this and that,
202
00:10:07,947 --> 00:10:10,515
and suddenly I'm slumped
in front of the TV,
203
00:10:10,582 --> 00:10:13,451
and I'm eating something
terribly unhealthy.
204
00:10:16,155 --> 00:10:17,355
I want pizza!
205
00:10:17,423 --> 00:10:18,157
Chinese!
206
00:10:18,224 --> 00:10:19,157
Cheese steaks!
207
00:10:19,224 --> 00:10:20,192
Cotton candy!
208
00:10:20,259 --> 00:10:21,558
Fried chicken!
209
00:10:21,626 --> 00:10:23,927
That sneaky bastard.
210
00:10:29,801 --> 00:10:30,635
Hey, babe.
211
00:10:30,702 --> 00:10:31,735
Hey, hon. How was work?
212
00:10:31,803 --> 00:10:34,204
Good, good.
213
00:10:34,272 --> 00:10:36,506
Listen, um, I'm pretty beat.
214
00:10:36,574 --> 00:10:37,674
I don't feel like cooking.
215
00:10:37,741 --> 00:10:39,876
Is it OK if we just order in?
216
00:10:39,943 --> 00:10:41,111
Oh, yeah, sure.
217
00:10:41,178 --> 00:10:42,545
What are you in the mood for?
218
00:10:42,613 --> 00:10:46,483
Well, I, uh, passed by this
new place on my way home.
219
00:10:46,550 --> 00:10:47,883
Looks kind of fun.
220
00:10:47,951 --> 00:10:51,887
"The Vegan Café and Juice Hut."
221
00:10:51,954 --> 00:10:53,522
You OK with that?
222
00:10:53,589 --> 00:10:55,057
Yeah, little different,
223
00:10:55,125 --> 00:10:56,725
but if that's what my
little lady wants,
224
00:10:56,792 --> 00:10:57,859
I'll give it a go.
225
00:10:57,926 --> 00:10:59,395
Oh, you're so sweet.
226
00:10:59,462 --> 00:11:00,495
All right, I'm gonna go change.
227
00:11:00,562 --> 00:11:01,729
You look over the menu. Will do.
228
00:11:01,796 --> 00:11:02,930
OK. OK.
229
00:11:07,670 --> 00:11:10,538
Arthur.
230
00:11:10,606 --> 00:11:11,838
"No oil, no butter.
231
00:11:11,906 --> 00:11:13,373
We only cook with love."
232
00:11:15,143 --> 00:11:16,443
Arthur!
233
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:20,179
Is it dinnertime yet?
234
00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:23,150
Yeah, yeah, come on.
235
00:11:23,217 --> 00:11:24,250
Some day, huh?
236
00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:26,151
City life, I'll tell ya.
237
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,220
Sometimes I wish we just
lived in the country,
238
00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:29,721
you know, lived on a...
239
00:11:29,789 --> 00:11:32,157
a farm.
240
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:33,324
Wait a second.
241
00:11:33,392 --> 00:11:34,626
Didn't you live on a farm?
242
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:37,229
Yes, I did, from the
ages of 7 to 10,
243
00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:40,232
then again at 43.
244
00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:42,534
Wow, I bet you had a
lot of animals, huh?
245
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:45,604
Oh, yes, we had a
veritable barnyard.
246
00:11:45,671 --> 00:11:47,872
What kind, exactly?
247
00:11:47,939 --> 00:11:49,241
Everything. Goats.
248
00:11:49,308 --> 00:11:51,376
Hmm, goats. What else?
249
00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:52,610
Chickens.
250
00:11:52,677 --> 00:11:54,945
Chicken. I had
chicken for lunch.
251
00:11:55,012 --> 00:11:56,546
Go on.
252
00:11:56,614 --> 00:11:59,081
Well, uh, horses, pigs...
253
00:11:59,149 --> 00:12:00,283
Pigs? Pigs? You had pigs?
254
00:12:00,351 --> 00:12:01,417
Oh, we had about
a dozen of them.
255
00:12:01,484 --> 00:12:02,718
You know, they're
actually quite loyal
256
00:12:02,786 --> 00:12:04,421
and intelligent animals.
257
00:12:04,488 --> 00:12:06,789
And not bad eatin', huh?
258
00:12:06,856 --> 00:12:09,358
Well, sure.
259
00:12:09,426 --> 00:12:12,294
We would marinate the ribs
in a honey whiskey sauce,
260
00:12:12,361 --> 00:12:15,298
then slow-cook 'em
over an open pit
261
00:12:15,365 --> 00:12:16,998
till the meat was so tender
262
00:12:17,066 --> 00:12:19,301
it was practically
falling off the bone.
263
00:12:19,367 --> 00:12:21,501
Mmm, I bet you can
still taste it, huh?
264
00:12:21,569 --> 00:12:22,770
Oh, can I.
265
00:12:22,838 --> 00:12:25,005
Yeah, you wanna taste
some tonight for dinner?
266
00:12:25,073 --> 00:12:26,773
No can do.
267
00:12:26,841 --> 00:12:28,642
I'm on a very strict diet.
268
00:12:28,709 --> 00:12:30,811
What?
269
00:12:30,878 --> 00:12:32,412
OK, you ready to order, honey?
270
00:12:32,479 --> 00:12:34,847
Uh, yeah, um,
271
00:12:34,916 --> 00:12:38,418
I'll go with the
grilled soy cheese.
272
00:12:50,230 --> 00:12:51,596
Everything was so
great, you know?
273
00:12:51,664 --> 00:12:53,798
I was working Arthur
like a finger puppet,
274
00:12:53,866 --> 00:12:55,233
and out of nowhere,
he goes on this diet.
275
00:12:55,301 --> 00:12:57,269
Now I can't eat
anything anymore.
276
00:12:57,337 --> 00:13:01,673
You do realize you're
eating a hot dog right now?
277
00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:02,539
Yeah, I know that.
278
00:13:02,641 --> 00:13:04,242
I'm talking about
when I eat at home.
279
00:13:04,309 --> 00:13:05,909
You know, Carrie always
wants to eat healthy.
280
00:13:05,977 --> 00:13:07,011
Now Arthur does, too.
281
00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:08,279
It's 2 to 1. I'm being outvoted.
282
00:13:08,347 --> 00:13:09,813
Well, you either gotta
keep eating healthy
283
00:13:09,881 --> 00:13:13,283
or get 2 other fat guys
to move in with you.
284
00:13:13,351 --> 00:13:14,818
That's funny. That's good.
285
00:13:16,787 --> 00:13:18,689
Hey, where's my hot dog?
286
00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:19,756
All right, it's coming.
287
00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:24,327
Here.
288
00:13:24,394 --> 00:13:25,895
Thanks.
289
00:13:25,963 --> 00:13:28,130
Did we really have to come all the
way down here to give you this?
290
00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:30,199
I mean, the cart
is 10 feet away.
291
00:13:30,266 --> 00:13:32,468
I can't move. I'm first in line.
292
00:13:34,137 --> 00:13:37,472
There is no line.
293
00:13:37,540 --> 00:13:38,574
People could come.
294
00:13:38,642 --> 00:13:40,409
So you really slept
out here all night?
295
00:13:40,477 --> 00:13:41,842
Yeah.
296
00:13:41,910 --> 00:13:43,244
Little rough.
297
00:13:43,312 --> 00:13:45,713
Little rough.
298
00:13:45,781 --> 00:13:49,083
Pretty sure someone touched me.
299
00:13:49,151 --> 00:13:50,417
Oh.
300
00:13:50,485 --> 00:13:52,686
Hold on.
301
00:13:52,754 --> 00:13:54,588
Hello.
302
00:13:54,656 --> 00:13:56,056
Yeah, no, Mom, I can't
take you right now.
303
00:13:56,123 --> 00:13:57,690
I'm a little busy.
304
00:13:57,757 --> 00:14:02,262
I... Well, wouldn't the
paramedics be faster?
305
00:14:02,330 --> 00:14:03,496
Oh, OK, OK,
306
00:14:03,564 --> 00:14:05,398
all right, OK, I'm coming...
coming.
307
00:14:05,465 --> 00:14:07,966
Guys, I gotta take my
mom to the doctor.
308
00:14:08,035 --> 00:14:09,902
Could you guys just
hold my place...
309
00:14:09,969 --> 00:14:11,270
No.
310
00:14:11,338 --> 00:14:12,404
Deac?
311
00:14:12,471 --> 00:14:14,206
Yeah, "no" sounded about right.
312
00:14:14,273 --> 00:14:15,741
Oh, please!
313
00:14:15,808 --> 00:14:16,974
I've been here 2 days.
314
00:14:17,043 --> 00:14:18,309
I'm gonna be gone
for a couple hours.
315
00:14:18,377 --> 00:14:20,278
You know what, Deac? You owe me.
316
00:14:20,346 --> 00:14:21,679
I've done a lot
of stuff for you.
317
00:14:21,747 --> 00:14:23,514
Yeah, like what?
318
00:14:23,582 --> 00:14:25,449
Like when Kelly kicked you out
319
00:14:25,517 --> 00:14:29,186
and I let you move into my
apartment 3 months rent-free
320
00:14:29,254 --> 00:14:31,622
and created a home for
you and your kids.
321
00:14:32,857 --> 00:14:34,291
Have fun, guy.
322
00:14:44,935 --> 00:14:46,035
Can I help you?
323
00:14:46,103 --> 00:14:47,370
What?
324
00:14:47,438 --> 00:14:49,138
Oh, God, Arthur, you...
325
00:14:49,206 --> 00:14:50,907
I didn't recognize
you from the back.
326
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:52,040
You look so lean.
327
00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:53,675
I thought you were the
Sparkletts delivery guy.
328
00:14:53,743 --> 00:14:54,844
Really?
329
00:14:54,911 --> 00:14:55,977
Absolutely.
330
00:14:56,045 --> 00:14:59,714
Well, I have been
dieting like a madman.
331
00:14:59,782 --> 00:15:01,550
And it shows.
332
00:15:01,617 --> 00:15:03,585
End of story, end of diet.
333
00:15:03,652 --> 00:15:06,587
Now let's talk about our favorite
South American countries.
334
00:15:06,654 --> 00:15:07,855
Mine's Chile.
335
00:15:09,324 --> 00:15:10,724
Hey, guys. Hey.
336
00:15:10,792 --> 00:15:12,093
What's up?
337
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,227
Actually, Douglas was saying
338
00:15:13,295 --> 00:15:15,096
I might want to
ease up on my diet.
339
00:15:15,163 --> 00:15:17,797
Oh, was he?
340
00:15:17,864 --> 00:15:19,599
Yes, what do you think, darling?
341
00:15:19,667 --> 00:15:21,267
Hmm, uh,
342
00:15:21,335 --> 00:15:22,469
I've gotta be honest
with you, Dad.
343
00:15:22,537 --> 00:15:25,705
I don't think you're,
uh, quite there yet.
344
00:15:25,773 --> 00:15:26,906
Really? I do.
345
00:15:26,973 --> 00:15:29,107
Mmm, I don't know. Turn around.
346
00:15:31,846 --> 00:15:37,550
Mmm, still seeing a lot
of butter on the biscuit.
347
00:15:37,616 --> 00:15:39,117
What rear end are
you looking at?
348
00:15:39,185 --> 00:15:41,153
Right there, Jiggles Magoo.
349
00:15:41,220 --> 00:15:43,154
Are you kidding? You know
what I want for Christmas?
350
00:15:43,221 --> 00:15:44,656
That ass wrapped
in bicycle shorts.
351
00:15:44,724 --> 00:15:47,425
No, he doesn't, Dad. He doesn't
want your ass for Christmas.
352
00:15:47,493 --> 00:15:48,626
I do, I do.
353
00:15:48,693 --> 00:15:50,027
Doug, I know what you've
been doing, all right?
354
00:15:50,095 --> 00:15:51,563
I know you've been
using my father
355
00:15:51,630 --> 00:15:53,330
to get the food that you want.
356
00:15:53,397 --> 00:15:54,565
What?
357
00:15:54,632 --> 00:15:56,767
Oh, come... Don't play dumb.
358
00:15:56,835 --> 00:15:58,735
Is this true, Douglas?
359
00:15:59,903 --> 00:16:03,473
So I guess my summer in Bologna
360
00:16:03,540 --> 00:16:05,041
meant nothing to you.
361
00:16:05,109 --> 00:16:06,475
Excuse me.
362
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:14,450
Tonight's dinner's your call.
363
00:16:14,518 --> 00:16:16,784
I'm easy.
364
00:16:16,852 --> 00:16:18,453
You know, this whole thing
is really your fault.
365
00:16:18,521 --> 00:16:20,522
Excuse me? Yeah.
366
00:16:20,589 --> 00:16:22,056
I only did all that because...
you know what?
367
00:16:22,124 --> 00:16:23,525
I never get any of the
things I want around here.
368
00:16:23,592 --> 00:16:25,059
I don't get the food I want.
369
00:16:25,127 --> 00:16:26,561
I don't get the videos I want.
370
00:16:26,629 --> 00:16:28,929
I let Arthur live in my house,
371
00:16:28,997 --> 00:16:30,297
and he gets anything
he asks for,
372
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:32,232
and I'm your husband,
and I get nothing!
373
00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:33,833
Really?
374
00:16:33,901 --> 00:16:36,203
Yeah.
375
00:16:36,270 --> 00:16:37,671
You get nothing?
376
00:16:37,739 --> 00:16:39,874
'Cause I... 'Cause I'm... I'm
kind of thinking back here,
377
00:16:39,941 --> 00:16:43,242
and I'm remembering ordering
a lot of pizzas for you
378
00:16:43,310 --> 00:16:44,811
and watching a lot
of Stallone movies
379
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:46,813
that I'm pretty sure
weren't my idea.
380
00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:48,948
Oh, and then there was that
lizard that I let you buy
381
00:16:49,016 --> 00:16:53,252
that may... or may not still
be in this house somewhere.
382
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,221
And I'm sorry. I'm confused.
383
00:16:55,288 --> 00:16:57,856
Was it my idea to drive 10 hours
384
00:16:57,924 --> 00:17:01,627
to the Ultimate Fighting
Championship in Dayton, Ohio?
385
00:17:01,694 --> 00:17:02,960
No...
386
00:17:03,028 --> 00:17:05,095
but you controlled the
radio most of the way.
387
00:17:05,163 --> 00:17:09,500
OK, so what are we talking
about here, Doug, huh?
388
00:17:09,568 --> 00:17:12,004
What things haven't you
gotten your way on?
389
00:17:12,070 --> 00:17:13,203
List them for me.
390
00:17:14,706 --> 00:17:16,574
I guess it was...
391
00:17:16,641 --> 00:17:19,042
that video that
Arthur wanted and...
392
00:17:19,110 --> 00:17:21,044
then the halibut.
393
00:17:21,112 --> 00:17:24,414
So, 2 things? Well, 2 in a row.
394
00:17:41,230 --> 00:17:42,964
Deac?
395
00:17:43,032 --> 00:17:45,433
Oh, hey, guys. What...
What's up?
396
00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:46,701
What's up, man? We're going to
check out the Jet Li movie.
397
00:17:46,768 --> 00:17:47,802
What you doing?
398
00:17:47,869 --> 00:17:50,103
Uh, nothing, just, uh...
399
00:17:50,171 --> 00:17:52,406
just chillin'.
400
00:17:52,474 --> 00:17:54,375
What's up with the wizard, man?
401
00:17:55,576 --> 00:17:58,045
Uh, that's actually...
Uh, is a friend's.
402
00:17:58,113 --> 00:17:59,212
Hold up.
403
00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:00,980
Are you lined up for
that Grün thing?
404
00:18:01,048 --> 00:18:03,483
No, no, man. I told you, I'm just
holding a place for my friend.
405
00:18:03,551 --> 00:18:05,552
Palmer's all Grüned up.
406
00:18:06,988 --> 00:18:08,420
All right, then.
407
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:14,660
Um... wait up, guys.
408
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,701
Hey, Arthur.
409
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,069
Hello.
410
00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:26,237
You want some ice cream?
411
00:18:26,305 --> 00:18:28,606
No, no.
412
00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:31,576
This cottage cheese
is all I'm allowed.
413
00:18:33,912 --> 00:18:36,146
You don't need to diet, OK?
You look great.
414
00:18:36,213 --> 00:18:37,381
Don't, Douglas.
415
00:18:37,448 --> 00:18:40,083
My body image is
topsy-turvy right now.
416
00:18:40,151 --> 00:18:44,654
Look, I'm really sorry
about everything, OK?
417
00:18:44,721 --> 00:18:45,721
If it makes you feel any better,
418
00:18:45,790 --> 00:18:47,356
Carrie's really
mad at me, and...
419
00:18:47,424 --> 00:18:48,591
she's not letting it go.
420
00:18:48,659 --> 00:18:49,858
How bad is it?
421
00:18:49,926 --> 00:18:51,761
Well, she won't talk to me,
422
00:18:51,828 --> 00:18:53,829
she won't look me in the
eye, and I'm pretty sure
423
00:18:53,897 --> 00:18:56,699
there won't be any shimmy-sham
in the near future.
424
00:18:58,968 --> 00:19:02,337
My second wife Lily used to shut
the gate on me pretty good, too.
425
00:19:05,541 --> 00:19:07,508
Really?
426
00:19:07,575 --> 00:19:09,844
Why don't you tell
me about that?
427
00:19:11,746 --> 00:19:14,381
I want you to have
sex with Douglas!
428
00:19:16,283 --> 00:19:17,818
And I want pizza!
429
00:19:27,427 --> 00:19:29,061
It was all right, man.
430
00:19:29,128 --> 00:19:30,162
Kind of...
431
00:19:30,230 --> 00:19:31,229
Wah-taah!
432
00:19:31,297 --> 00:19:32,965
It was good.
433
00:19:36,870 --> 00:19:39,471
Let's go that way.
434
00:19:42,474 --> 00:19:43,775
I'm in the front of the line.
435
00:19:43,843 --> 00:19:44,877
Been here a few days.
436
00:19:44,944 --> 00:19:45,943
I'm just going to
go back up, and...
437
00:19:46,011 --> 00:19:47,613
Nice wand. Excellent.
438
00:19:47,679 --> 00:19:50,080
Oh, Vorpal sword. Brilliant.
439
00:19:50,148 --> 00:19:52,884
Yeah. Mach Tow. All right.
440
00:19:52,951 --> 00:19:54,284
Knee boots... work it.
441
00:19:54,352 --> 00:19:57,153
I'm in front of the line...
yeah.
29846
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