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1
00:00:10,781 --> 00:00:11,947
Doug!
2
00:00:12,815 --> 00:00:14,016
I'm here. I'm ready.
3
00:00:14,083 --> 00:00:15,117
Where's the blanket?
4
00:00:15,184 --> 00:00:16,650
What?
5
00:00:16,718 --> 00:00:18,869
I just yelled up for you
to bring down a blanket.
6
00:00:18,937 --> 00:00:20,403
Oh, I couldn't understand you,
7
00:00:20,471 --> 00:00:21,721
but whatever you wanted,
8
00:00:21,788 --> 00:00:23,822
I was just hoping
it would blow over.
9
00:00:23,890 --> 00:00:25,090
Well, it hasn't.
10
00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:27,092
We are seeing a
movie in the park,
11
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:29,226
and I would prefer a
layer of protection
12
00:00:29,294 --> 00:00:33,196
between me and whatever the
police horse just left.
13
00:00:33,264 --> 00:00:34,431
Oh, it's not bad enough
14
00:00:34,498 --> 00:00:36,465
going out with Spence
and his new girlfriend,
15
00:00:36,533 --> 00:00:38,233
we gotta go see a
movie in a park?
16
00:00:38,301 --> 00:00:40,969
Doug, I think it's great
that he finally has a date.
17
00:00:41,037 --> 00:00:42,671
Come on. You have
to be supportive.
18
00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:44,038
He is your friend.
19
00:00:44,105 --> 00:00:46,073
Yeah, but he's, he's not
a double-date friend.
20
00:00:46,140 --> 00:00:47,641
He's, he's the 3rd wheel.
21
00:00:47,709 --> 00:00:49,626
He's the one who
watches the coats
22
00:00:49,693 --> 00:00:52,794
when the rest of us
are out dancing.
23
00:00:52,812 --> 00:00:54,463
Well, tonight he has a date,
24
00:00:54,531 --> 00:00:56,246
and we have to leave
in 5 minutes.
25
00:00:57,783 --> 00:01:00,483
So you, uh, still on
this blanket kick or...
26
00:01:00,551 --> 00:01:01,952
Yes! Go!
27
00:01:04,955 --> 00:01:07,072
Dad, your dinner's ready!
28
00:01:07,140 --> 00:01:09,106
Great. I worked up
quite an appetite
29
00:01:09,174 --> 00:01:11,108
at my "movement to music" class.
30
00:01:12,277 --> 00:01:14,678
Bring on the vittles.
31
00:01:14,746 --> 00:01:16,546
Here you go.
32
00:01:16,613 --> 00:01:19,314
A meal in a tray. Thank
you, stewardess.
33
00:01:19,382 --> 00:01:20,882
When do we land?
34
00:01:21,517 --> 00:01:22,717
I'm sorry, dad.
35
00:01:22,785 --> 00:01:24,785
I didn't have time to
make you a whole thing.
36
00:01:24,853 --> 00:01:25,953
Probably for the best,
37
00:01:26,021 --> 00:01:28,888
based on last night's
pink-chicken scare.
38
00:01:33,826 --> 00:01:35,126
What are you doing?
39
00:01:35,194 --> 00:01:37,194
What? You wanted a blanket.
40
00:01:37,262 --> 00:01:40,014
That is the comforter
from our bed.
41
00:01:41,882 --> 00:01:44,750
Why do you always give me jobs
where you know I'm gonna fail?
42
00:01:47,203 --> 00:01:48,936
So what movie we seein', anyway?
43
00:01:49,004 --> 00:01:50,204
Casablanca.
44
00:01:50,272 --> 00:01:51,672
Oh, a black and white movie?
45
00:01:51,740 --> 00:01:52,805
It's a great movie.
46
00:01:52,873 --> 00:01:54,174
Dad, back me up here.
47
00:01:54,242 --> 00:01:55,342
Casablanca?
48
00:01:55,410 --> 00:01:56,726
Never saw it.
49
00:01:57,827 --> 00:01:59,344
You must have.
50
00:01:59,413 --> 00:02:01,078
Humphrey bogart owns a cafe.
51
00:02:01,146 --> 00:02:02,747
Ingrid bergman
walks back into...
52
00:02:02,815 --> 00:02:03,948
Don't ruin it for me!
53
00:02:04,016 --> 00:02:07,885
LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!
54
00:02:07,952 --> 00:02:10,486
I'm sorry I was in no
condition to receive you
55
00:02:10,554 --> 00:02:11,971
when you called
on me last night.
56
00:02:12,039 --> 00:02:14,006
It doesn't matter.
57
00:02:14,073 --> 00:02:15,707
What is the matter with you?
58
00:02:15,774 --> 00:02:17,324
I gotta keep shifting.
59
00:02:17,425 --> 00:02:19,293
My ass is so asleep,
it's dreaming.
60
00:02:22,363 --> 00:02:23,563
Isn't this cool?
61
00:02:23,631 --> 00:02:26,064
You got bogart, great outdoors,
62
00:02:26,132 --> 00:02:28,634
and this pretty lady.
63
00:02:28,702 --> 00:02:30,501
Isn't he cute?
64
00:02:30,569 --> 00:02:31,703
He is.
65
00:02:34,055 --> 00:02:36,873
Yeah, he's like a little
bobble-head doll of himself.
66
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:40,208
Hey, anybody hungry?
I made some stuff.
67
00:02:41,210 --> 00:02:44,245
Uh... mango spring rolls.
68
00:02:44,313 --> 00:02:45,345
Mmm-hmm.
69
00:02:45,413 --> 00:02:47,814
And cider-basted spare ribs
70
00:02:47,882 --> 00:02:49,283
there you go.
71
00:02:49,350 --> 00:02:51,083
Wow, Becky, you made all
this for the movie?
72
00:02:51,151 --> 00:02:52,252
Oh, it was no trouble.
73
00:02:52,319 --> 00:02:54,653
You put me to shame.
All I have is a cloret
74
00:02:54,721 --> 00:02:56,722
and some old
birth-control pills.
75
00:02:58,089 --> 00:02:59,690
Mangia.
76
00:02:59,758 --> 00:03:01,924
Oh, don't worry. I go to
the culinary institute,
77
00:03:01,992 --> 00:03:04,361
so this is a project
for one of my classes.
78
00:03:04,428 --> 00:03:06,161
Well, feel free to
tell the teacher
79
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,096
the Doug ate your homework.
80
00:03:14,384 --> 00:03:15,919
Oh, what is this?
81
00:03:15,986 --> 00:03:18,153
Oh, it's a shrimp-
and-chive quesadilla,
82
00:03:18,221 --> 00:03:20,789
with salsa-and-
chili sour cream.
83
00:03:21,924 --> 00:03:23,124
Really?
84
00:03:25,477 --> 00:03:26,677
You like it?
85
00:03:26,745 --> 00:03:28,345
Like it? I got a
chunk in my teeth,
86
00:03:28,412 --> 00:03:30,079
I'm saving for the ride home.
87
00:03:31,281 --> 00:03:34,082
Really? You're so nice.
88
00:03:37,336 --> 00:03:39,102
Why are you picking
out the chives?
89
00:03:39,170 --> 00:03:41,672
Because they aggravate my
patamkin-Reese syndrome.
90
00:03:42,673 --> 00:03:43,806
Mmm!
91
00:03:43,874 --> 00:03:45,241
What? What? What? What?
92
00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:47,308
What are these crispy nuggets,
93
00:03:47,376 --> 00:03:49,645
and why aren't they in every vending
machine across the country?
94
00:03:49,712 --> 00:03:51,512
Here. Try them with
the dipping sauces.
95
00:03:51,580 --> 00:03:52,780
What have you got?
96
00:03:52,848 --> 00:03:55,999
I got honey-mustard and,
don't laugh, chocolate.
97
00:03:56,066 --> 00:03:58,266
Don't you laugh when I
dip one nugget in both.
98
00:04:18,833 --> 00:04:21,201
Oh, you got Casablanca!
99
00:04:21,269 --> 00:04:23,068
It's marvelous.
100
00:04:23,136 --> 00:04:26,855
Bogart chooses the greater
good over his own desires.
101
00:04:26,922 --> 00:04:28,390
Quite an uplifting message.
102
00:04:28,458 --> 00:04:30,724
I know. It's a classic.
103
00:04:30,792 --> 00:04:33,110
Personally, I would have
turned the other guy in,
104
00:04:33,178 --> 00:04:35,461
taken Ingrid bergman
back to the hotel,
105
00:04:35,529 --> 00:04:38,081
and rounded up her
"usual suspects,"
106
00:04:38,148 --> 00:04:40,115
if you know what I mean.
107
00:04:41,234 --> 00:04:42,517
I do,
108
00:04:42,584 --> 00:04:45,353
which is why I just brought
up a little muffin.
109
00:04:45,421 --> 00:04:47,387
Actually, while I was
at the video store,
110
00:04:47,455 --> 00:04:48,922
another box caught my eye.
111
00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:51,290
Some kind of a holiday picture.
112
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,260
It's a wonderful life?
113
00:04:55,327 --> 00:04:56,528
Who knows?
114
00:04:56,595 --> 00:04:58,862
Maybe I discovered a hidden gem.
115
00:04:58,930 --> 00:05:00,364
Keep me posted.
116
00:05:03,967 --> 00:05:05,000
Hey, honey.
117
00:05:05,069 --> 00:05:07,569
Hi. You want to
order some takeout?
118
00:05:07,636 --> 00:05:09,071
Nah, I'm not really hungry.
119
00:05:09,138 --> 00:05:11,539
Seriously. Where do you
want to order from?
120
00:05:11,606 --> 00:05:13,740
Nah, I'm not hungry. I
was over at Spence's,
121
00:05:13,808 --> 00:05:15,542
and Becky made me
these incredible
122
00:05:15,609 --> 00:05:17,177
grilled scallops with bacon.
123
00:05:17,244 --> 00:05:18,478
Bacon!
124
00:05:20,646 --> 00:05:22,980
Why didn't you tell me you
were having dinner over there?
125
00:05:23,048 --> 00:05:24,048
I've been waiting.
126
00:05:24,116 --> 00:05:25,366
I wasn't planning on it.
127
00:05:25,434 --> 00:05:27,134
I stopped by, and she
asked me my opinion
128
00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:28,601
on a few of her recipes.
129
00:05:28,669 --> 00:05:30,637
I actually brought a
couple scallops for you,
130
00:05:30,704 --> 00:05:33,188
but there's a very long light
at northern boulevard,
131
00:05:33,256 --> 00:05:35,607
and they went away.
132
00:05:35,675 --> 00:05:38,109
Well, you took 'em as
far as you could, hon'.
133
00:05:38,177 --> 00:05:41,044
Get this. She asked me if I'd do
this for her, like, twice a week.
134
00:05:41,112 --> 00:05:42,129
What do you mean?
135
00:05:42,196 --> 00:05:43,295
Like, go over there and eat?
136
00:05:43,363 --> 00:05:44,363
Yeah.
137
00:05:44,431 --> 00:05:47,633
Well, why can't
Spence just help her?
138
00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:49,117
'Cause he's allergic
to everything.
139
00:05:49,185 --> 00:05:50,735
The guy's, like, one
sesame seed away
140
00:05:50,803 --> 00:05:52,904
from living in a plastic bubble.
141
00:05:55,940 --> 00:05:58,541
Ok, well, if that's
what you wanna do.
142
00:05:58,609 --> 00:06:00,109
What? Wh-what's the matter?
143
00:06:00,177 --> 00:06:02,294
I just don't think with
your 4-digit cholesterol
144
00:06:02,361 --> 00:06:05,897
that eating professionally is the
best move for you right now.
145
00:06:05,964 --> 00:06:07,131
Come on, car'.
146
00:06:07,199 --> 00:06:08,298
I'm serious.
147
00:06:08,365 --> 00:06:09,432
So am I.
148
00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:11,633
Look, I've eaten a lot
of food in my day,
149
00:06:11,702 --> 00:06:13,952
cooked by a lot of
different people,
150
00:06:14,071 --> 00:06:16,721
and I gotta tell you,
this kid's got it.
151
00:06:19,024 --> 00:06:20,807
Carrie, let me be part of this.
152
00:06:21,976 --> 00:06:23,293
Like superman,
153
00:06:24,161 --> 00:06:26,012
I was put here for a reason.
154
00:06:30,366 --> 00:06:32,366
What are you cooking, Becky?
155
00:06:33,835 --> 00:06:38,521
You got monterey Jack cheese
melting inside the burger?
156
00:06:38,539 --> 00:06:40,172
It's an inside-out cheeseburger,
157
00:06:40,239 --> 00:06:42,424
is that what you're tellin' me?
158
00:06:42,492 --> 00:06:45,309
Oh, God, does that sound good.
159
00:06:46,795 --> 00:06:49,162
Ok, let me just throw
this at you, ok?
160
00:06:49,230 --> 00:06:53,165
Now, what if instead of fries,
161
00:06:53,233 --> 00:06:55,501
you went with sweet
potato wedges?
162
00:06:58,738 --> 00:07:00,270
Oh, stop. Stop. Hey!
163
00:07:00,338 --> 00:07:02,439
Einstein was a genius.
164
00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:05,874
Oh, hey, hon'.
165
00:07:05,942 --> 00:07:07,610
Ok, so I'll see you Thursday.
166
00:07:07,677 --> 00:07:09,944
All right, bye.
167
00:07:10,012 --> 00:07:12,146
Surprised you didn't
try to suck the food
168
00:07:12,214 --> 00:07:14,047
through the phone line.
169
00:07:14,116 --> 00:07:16,049
Ok, look, before you
start copping attitude,
170
00:07:16,118 --> 00:07:17,783
I'm going to the gym again,
171
00:07:17,851 --> 00:07:20,619
so with all the extra
food, it's a push.
172
00:07:21,921 --> 00:07:24,222
This area right here
will remain unchanged.
173
00:07:24,289 --> 00:07:26,324
That's my pledge to you.
174
00:07:27,826 --> 00:07:29,259
It's not just that, Doug.
175
00:07:29,327 --> 00:07:32,061
It's this whole
thing with Becky.
176
00:07:32,130 --> 00:07:33,362
Thing? There isn't a thing.
177
00:07:33,430 --> 00:07:35,564
Oh, I think there's a thing.
178
00:07:37,466 --> 00:07:39,501
You're saying, that
I'm attracted to her?
179
00:07:39,568 --> 00:07:41,335
I don't know what it is, Doug.
180
00:07:41,402 --> 00:07:44,204
All I know is you just spent a
half hour on the phone with her.
181
00:07:44,272 --> 00:07:47,857
"You hang up."
"No, you hang up."
182
00:07:47,924 --> 00:07:50,291
Look, I am not interested
in Becky at all.
183
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:53,093
We have one thing in common. That's it.
You're being ridiculous.
184
00:07:53,161 --> 00:07:54,528
I don't think I am.
185
00:07:54,596 --> 00:07:56,880
Oh, so according to you,
it is somehow wrong for me
186
00:07:56,947 --> 00:07:58,464
to go to my friend's house
187
00:07:58,532 --> 00:08:00,599
where his girlfriend
cooks me stuff.
188
00:08:00,667 --> 00:08:01,683
Yeah.
189
00:08:02,485 --> 00:08:03,902
Where does it end, Carrie?
190
00:08:03,970 --> 00:08:05,536
Hey, you know what?
191
00:08:05,604 --> 00:08:07,338
The 70-year-old dispatcher lady at I.P.S.
Made me brownies.
192
00:08:07,356 --> 00:08:09,055
Should I just march
into her cage and go,
193
00:08:09,123 --> 00:08:11,324
"you know what, chantelle?
It is over!"
194
00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:16,228
The point is I don't have
195
00:08:16,295 --> 00:08:18,029
little relationships
with other men
196
00:08:18,097 --> 00:08:20,081
where I'm talkin' to
them on the phone,
197
00:08:20,148 --> 00:08:22,032
hangin' out because we
have stuff in common,
198
00:08:22,100 --> 00:08:23,600
because I know it
would bother you.
199
00:08:23,668 --> 00:08:25,601
Well, you know what? It
absolutely wouldn't.
200
00:08:25,669 --> 00:08:28,071
No? No? Because there's
a partner at my work
201
00:08:28,138 --> 00:08:30,705
who keeps asking me to go jogging
with him in the morning.
202
00:08:30,773 --> 00:08:33,490
He's one of the younger partners,
you know, on his way up,
203
00:08:33,558 --> 00:08:36,160
so I guess it would be fine
with you if I did that?
204
00:08:36,227 --> 00:08:37,611
Yeah.
205
00:08:37,678 --> 00:08:39,746
Oh, good. Good. I'm glad
we had this conversation,
206
00:08:39,814 --> 00:08:43,665
because this opens up a
whole new world for me.
207
00:08:43,733 --> 00:08:45,616
You know, they say
you actually burn
208
00:08:45,684 --> 00:08:47,885
more calories speed-walking
than running.
209
00:08:48,486 --> 00:08:49,953
Really?
210
00:08:53,957 --> 00:08:55,090
Spence?
211
00:08:55,158 --> 00:08:56,441
Oh, hey, Carrie.
212
00:08:56,509 --> 00:08:58,659
Oh, I gotta stop.
213
00:08:58,727 --> 00:09:00,111
He owes me money.
214
00:09:00,178 --> 00:09:01,811
I'll circle around.
215
00:09:02,413 --> 00:09:04,214
Oh, ok!
216
00:09:05,132 --> 00:09:07,467
Here we go, Alan. Come on.
Here we go.
217
00:09:08,168 --> 00:09:09,668
Who was that?
218
00:09:09,736 --> 00:09:11,920
He's one of the partners
from my law firm.
219
00:09:11,988 --> 00:09:14,688
Listen, if Doug asks, he's
got a rock-hard ass, ok?
220
00:09:14,756 --> 00:09:16,523
Ooh, what's going on?
221
00:09:16,591 --> 00:09:18,124
What's going on is
222
00:09:18,192 --> 00:09:20,259
I'm jogging with this
putz every morning
223
00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:22,678
because Doug is spending all
this time with your girlfriend.
224
00:09:22,746 --> 00:09:23,879
Yeah, what is up with them?
225
00:09:23,946 --> 00:09:25,080
I don't know. You tell me.
226
00:09:25,147 --> 00:09:26,397
Well, they're so annoying.
227
00:09:26,465 --> 00:09:28,031
You know, "ooh,
Doug, taste this.
228
00:09:28,099 --> 00:09:29,533
"Doug, dip that.
229
00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,217
Spence, go get Doug
a shrimp fork."
230
00:09:31,285 --> 00:09:33,353
Oh, I know! And how about that
231
00:09:33,421 --> 00:09:35,021
"incredible veal
dish" she makes,
232
00:09:35,088 --> 00:09:36,856
all right? Not getting that.
Thank you!
233
00:09:36,924 --> 00:09:39,257
It's like ease the throttle
on the garlic, honey.
234
00:09:39,324 --> 00:09:41,209
It's pure showboating. I know!
235
00:09:41,277 --> 00:09:43,360
You... you coming, Carrie?
236
00:09:43,427 --> 00:09:44,694
Oh. Yeah.
237
00:09:46,763 --> 00:09:48,630
Just get me my friggin' money.
238
00:10:09,998 --> 00:10:11,364
Rock-hard ass!
239
00:10:15,218 --> 00:10:16,685
No, honey, it's me.
240
00:10:19,788 --> 00:10:23,156
Carrie, these jogs
are wiping you out.
241
00:10:23,224 --> 00:10:25,859
You really don't need to keep
doin' this to prove a point.
242
00:10:25,927 --> 00:10:29,578
I am not doing this
to prove a point.
243
00:10:29,647 --> 00:10:32,931
I love the chill
of early morning.
244
00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:35,199
If hanging out with Becky
bothers you this much,
245
00:10:35,266 --> 00:10:37,201
you know what? It's...
it's not worth it.
246
00:10:37,268 --> 00:10:38,384
Really? Yes.
247
00:10:38,452 --> 00:10:40,303
And you know what? In
fact, come with me.
248
00:10:40,371 --> 00:10:42,804
Loving husband in action.
249
00:10:42,872 --> 00:10:44,205
Here we go.
250
00:10:46,575 --> 00:10:49,277
This is the kind of guy
you married, right here.
251
00:10:53,197 --> 00:10:54,347
It's her machine.
252
00:10:54,415 --> 00:10:56,482
Becky, hi. Yeah, it's Doug.
253
00:10:56,549 --> 00:10:58,916
Listen, I'm not gonna
be able to come over
254
00:10:58,984 --> 00:11:01,519
and do the food thing anymore.
255
00:11:01,586 --> 00:11:03,086
Yeah, I'm really busy at work,
256
00:11:03,154 --> 00:11:05,322
and I got a lot of
things going on,
257
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:08,991
so from now on just send
the food over with Spence,
258
00:11:09,058 --> 00:11:11,226
and I'll give him
my comments, ok?
259
00:11:11,293 --> 00:11:14,428
All right, thank you. Bye-bye.
260
00:11:14,496 --> 00:11:17,364
See? Now everybody wins, ok?
I don't see her anymore,
261
00:11:17,431 --> 00:11:19,098
and I still get to eat her food.
262
00:11:19,166 --> 00:11:20,366
Which reminds me,
263
00:11:20,433 --> 00:11:22,534
I got some leftover pasta here.
264
00:11:22,602 --> 00:11:25,220
This is great. Ah.
265
00:11:25,287 --> 00:11:28,355
Spaghetti and meatballs,
sounds boring, doesn't it?
266
00:11:28,423 --> 00:11:31,091
Not when it's 3
different-colored noodles.
267
00:11:39,431 --> 00:11:41,365
Mmm. Incredible.
268
00:11:44,435 --> 00:11:47,603
Ok, you know what?
269
00:11:47,671 --> 00:11:50,690
Um, this isn't gonna
work for me, either.
270
00:11:51,590 --> 00:11:52,557
What?
271
00:11:52,692 --> 00:11:53,642
Yeah.
272
00:11:53,709 --> 00:11:55,159
I don't want you
eating her food.
273
00:11:55,226 --> 00:11:57,778
I told you I'm not attracted,
I'm not seeing her anymore.
274
00:11:57,845 --> 00:11:59,445
But you're still involved.
275
00:11:59,513 --> 00:12:00,780
With her spaghetti!
276
00:12:00,848 --> 00:12:02,799
Even so!
277
00:12:02,867 --> 00:12:04,833
I'm eating it! I'm not
sleeping with it!
278
00:12:04,900 --> 00:12:06,101
It's food!
279
00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:07,952
Exactly!
280
00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:10,387
It's like you're, uh,
having a food affair.
281
00:12:10,455 --> 00:12:13,006
Eatin' is not cheatin'!
282
00:12:13,074 --> 00:12:15,191
Well, it still bothers me.
283
00:12:15,259 --> 00:12:17,443
Ok, fine. You know what?
You win, ok?
284
00:12:17,510 --> 00:12:19,394
You know what? Well,
she found us out,
285
00:12:19,461 --> 00:12:20,678
so I'm gonna have to end it.
286
00:12:20,746 --> 00:12:23,413
Yeah, oh, yeah. I
love you, spaghetti,
287
00:12:23,481 --> 00:12:25,048
but you're gonna have to go.
288
00:12:25,115 --> 00:12:26,550
Oh, just one more kiss!
289
00:12:29,152 --> 00:12:32,487
Oh, daddy loves you.
Oh, yes, he does.
290
00:12:34,523 --> 00:12:37,424
Now, go! Go! Go! Go!
291
00:12:37,492 --> 00:12:39,192
Oh, God forgive me.
292
00:12:47,749 --> 00:12:49,316
Oh, it's a wonderful life.
293
00:12:49,384 --> 00:12:51,018
Pretty great, huh?
294
00:12:51,086 --> 00:12:53,553
Actually, I think this
one's a swing and a miss.
295
00:12:56,740 --> 00:12:59,291
What are you talkin' about?
296
00:12:59,358 --> 00:13:01,559
It's one of the greatest
movies of all time.
297
00:13:01,627 --> 00:13:03,310
Well, I don't get it.
298
00:13:03,378 --> 00:13:06,413
With George Bailey, the
town couldn't be duller.
299
00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:09,248
Without him, there's
nightclubs, casinos.
300
00:13:09,316 --> 00:13:11,450
It's fabulous.
301
00:13:11,518 --> 00:13:13,417
I wish he never had been born.
302
00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:17,771
Well, that's a fresh take on it.
303
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:20,039
By the way, I was
talking to Spence.
304
00:13:20,107 --> 00:13:21,407
He was recommending a film
305
00:13:21,475 --> 00:13:23,543
about a young girl from Kansas
306
00:13:23,610 --> 00:13:25,643
who goes to some magical land.
307
00:13:27,597 --> 00:13:29,479
Have you heard of it, darling?
308
00:13:30,365 --> 00:13:32,766
Good lord.
309
00:13:32,867 --> 00:13:34,901
Well, I understand there
are midgets in it,
310
00:13:34,968 --> 00:13:37,102
and that spells "funny."
311
00:13:37,170 --> 00:13:40,871
Anyway, I invited Spence and
his new ladyfriend over
312
00:13:40,939 --> 00:13:42,674
to watch it with
us tomorrow night.
313
00:13:42,741 --> 00:13:44,574
What? No.
314
00:13:44,642 --> 00:13:45,859
What's the matter?
315
00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:48,327
Oh, I... I had this
big thing with Doug
316
00:13:48,395 --> 00:13:49,895
and Spence's girlfriend.
317
00:13:49,963 --> 00:13:52,597
It's a long story,
but basically,
318
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,899
he likes her spaghetti too much.
319
00:13:55,701 --> 00:13:57,634
I see, and, uh,
320
00:13:57,702 --> 00:14:01,304
what is "spaghetti"
a euphemism for?
321
00:14:01,372 --> 00:14:04,890
No, dad, he really just
likes her spaghetti.
322
00:14:04,958 --> 00:14:06,624
Uh-huh,
323
00:14:06,692 --> 00:14:09,743
and did you catch him
"liking her spaghetti"?
324
00:14:10,678 --> 00:14:13,045
Dad, it's really the food.
325
00:14:13,114 --> 00:14:14,514
Becky's a great cook,
326
00:14:14,582 --> 00:14:16,449
and Doug loves what she makes.
327
00:14:16,616 --> 00:14:17,900
Well, what's wrong with that?
328
00:14:17,967 --> 00:14:19,752
I want him to like
what I make, you know?
329
00:14:19,820 --> 00:14:22,186
It's like remember how mom used
to make those huge dinners
330
00:14:22,254 --> 00:14:23,822
with the homemade
biscuits and gravy.
331
00:14:23,889 --> 00:14:25,121
You'd be so happy.
332
00:14:25,189 --> 00:14:27,390
Oh, sure, but your
mother was home all day.
333
00:14:27,459 --> 00:14:28,891
You're a career woman.
334
00:14:28,959 --> 00:14:31,727
Yeah, but even if
I wasn't, I mean,
335
00:14:31,795 --> 00:14:33,328
I'm not like mom or Becky.
336
00:14:33,395 --> 00:14:35,330
I don't have it in me.
I'm not a nurturer.
337
00:14:35,397 --> 00:14:36,565
Of course you are.
338
00:14:36,632 --> 00:14:38,766
You've been nothing but
warm and loving to me.
339
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:40,100
Oh, that's not true.
340
00:14:40,168 --> 00:14:41,534
I make you sleep
in the basement.
341
00:14:41,602 --> 00:14:42,986
I know.
342
00:14:43,053 --> 00:14:45,053
I was just tryin' to
throw you a bone.
343
00:14:48,741 --> 00:14:49,723
Hey, man.
344
00:14:49,791 --> 00:14:50,891
What's up?
345
00:15:07,338 --> 00:15:09,304
That tupperware looks familiar.
346
00:15:09,372 --> 00:15:10,706
Is that Becky's?
347
00:15:10,774 --> 00:15:11,774
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
348
00:15:11,842 --> 00:15:12,875
She made some stuff for me.
349
00:15:12,943 --> 00:15:14,643
Said she wanted my opinion.
350
00:15:16,512 --> 00:15:20,247
You know, I used to do
that, but, whatever.
351
00:15:20,314 --> 00:15:22,314
Yeah, she said you
couldn't do it anymore.
352
00:15:22,382 --> 00:15:24,216
Yeah, Carrie got all
psycho about it.
353
00:15:24,284 --> 00:15:26,318
Oh, one man's psycho
wife is another man's
354
00:15:26,386 --> 00:15:27,536
Turkey meatloaf.
355
00:15:30,271 --> 00:15:31,639
And, oh...
356
00:15:33,607 --> 00:15:35,608
Sweet potato wedges. Mmm.
357
00:15:36,744 --> 00:15:38,577
Mmm.
358
00:15:38,645 --> 00:15:43,280
Huh, you know, she, uh, she
got that idea from me,
359
00:15:43,349 --> 00:15:45,582
but, hey, a billion years ago.
360
00:15:49,153 --> 00:15:51,871
Mmm! Mmm. Mmm, mmm, mmm.
361
00:15:51,938 --> 00:15:54,172
You know, you just...
You just can't eat it.
362
00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:56,040
You gotta think
about it, you know?
363
00:15:56,108 --> 00:15:58,441
You're supposed to give her
a professional opinion.
364
00:15:58,509 --> 00:16:01,612
Yeah, well, my professional
opinion is "damn!"
365
00:16:01,679 --> 00:16:03,246
Ok, you know what?
This isn't right.
366
00:16:03,313 --> 00:16:04,580
What?
367
00:16:04,648 --> 00:16:06,481
This food is supposed to be mine.
It's meant for me.
368
00:16:06,549 --> 00:16:07,716
You see this label?
369
00:16:07,783 --> 00:16:09,718
After the "d" it should
say "oug" not "eacon."
370
00:16:09,784 --> 00:16:10,751
You're crazy, man.
371
00:16:10,818 --> 00:16:11,985
No, no, no. You know what?
372
00:16:12,053 --> 00:16:13,986
I'm not gone from Becky's
table for 2 minutes,
373
00:16:14,054 --> 00:16:16,989
and you're already sittin' down,
stickin' your fork in my food.
374
00:16:19,359 --> 00:16:22,193
You gettin' busy with
this chick, or somethin'?
375
00:16:22,261 --> 00:16:23,211
No.
376
00:16:25,980 --> 00:16:27,681
My God, Carrie's right.
377
00:16:29,033 --> 00:16:30,733
I'm having a food affair.
378
00:16:33,603 --> 00:16:34,969
Excuse me.
379
00:16:39,724 --> 00:16:41,258
Hey, honey, I... I
gotta talk to you.
380
00:16:41,326 --> 00:16:42,592
Hey, stir this.
381
00:16:42,660 --> 00:16:43,726
What? What's going on?
382
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:46,728
Oh, my dad invited
Spence and Becky over
383
00:16:46,796 --> 00:16:49,030
to watch the wizard of oz,
and I am making dinner.
384
00:16:49,098 --> 00:16:51,199
I'm cooking all the things
you love in the world.
385
00:16:51,266 --> 00:16:52,433
Oh, crap! Biscuits.
386
00:16:52,501 --> 00:16:53,668
You don't have to do all this.
387
00:16:53,735 --> 00:16:54,834
Yes, Doug,
388
00:16:54,902 --> 00:16:56,670
you were not getting
what you need from me.
389
00:16:56,737 --> 00:16:58,104
I need to nurture you.
390
00:16:58,172 --> 00:17:00,038
No, no. I was totally wrong, ok?
391
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:01,307
I got crazy over Becky's food.
392
00:17:01,374 --> 00:17:03,374
It was stupid. It's over now.
393
00:17:03,442 --> 00:17:04,809
No, no, no. Listen to me.
394
00:17:04,876 --> 00:17:07,043
You are a big guy.
You love food,
395
00:17:07,111 --> 00:17:08,478
and I took you for granted.
396
00:17:08,546 --> 00:17:10,796
I just assumed whatever
slop I put in front of you
397
00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,397
you'd be fine with.
398
00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:14,133
I was fine with it. Look at me.
399
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,067
I could eat the
table and be happy.
400
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:20,287
The point is I didn't put
anything into it, you know?
401
00:17:20,354 --> 00:17:22,422
I didn't put any love
into it like Becky does.
402
00:17:22,490 --> 00:17:24,223
Ok, Carrie, look. You
gotta believe me.
403
00:17:24,291 --> 00:17:27,392
Ok, it doesn't matter what
Becky makes her food with,
404
00:17:27,460 --> 00:17:29,828
love, little chunks of ham...
405
00:17:31,529 --> 00:17:33,364
I don't need it.
406
00:17:33,482 --> 00:17:34,632
Really?
407
00:17:34,698 --> 00:17:36,415
Yeah, absolutely. I
mean, I love you,
408
00:17:36,483 --> 00:17:40,102
and whatever you make for
me, that's all I need.
409
00:17:41,071 --> 00:17:42,637
Thank you, honey.
410
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:45,539
Oh, that's them!
411
00:17:45,607 --> 00:17:46,607
Ok, all right.
412
00:17:47,574 --> 00:17:48,574
We're here.
413
00:17:48,642 --> 00:17:49,575
Hi!
414
00:17:49,643 --> 00:17:50,610
What's going on?
415
00:17:50,677 --> 00:17:51,676
Thanks for having us.
416
00:17:51,744 --> 00:17:52,945
Oh, no problem.
417
00:17:53,013 --> 00:17:54,746
I threw together a little salad.
418
00:17:59,483 --> 00:18:02,419
Thank you. That was so sweet.
419
00:18:02,486 --> 00:18:04,320
I'm glad to help if you need me.
420
00:18:04,388 --> 00:18:07,522
Oh, I'm sure you are,
421
00:18:07,589 --> 00:18:09,724
but this salad is...
is quite enough,
422
00:18:09,792 --> 00:18:11,825
especially after I
specifically told you
423
00:18:11,893 --> 00:18:13,143
not to bring anything.
424
00:18:14,662 --> 00:18:16,695
Well, I thought I
should bring something.
425
00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:19,032
Yeah, sure you did, but, um,
426
00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:21,566
I did tell you not
to bring anything.
427
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:24,368
I guess next time we'll just
have to put it in writing.
428
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:27,071
Honey, I'm gonna bring the
crackers in the other room.
429
00:18:27,139 --> 00:18:28,405
Ok, sweetie.
430
00:18:28,472 --> 00:18:30,373
All right, you listen
to me, cookie.
431
00:18:32,108 --> 00:18:33,875
I'm onto your game, ok?
432
00:18:33,944 --> 00:18:36,110
And it ain't gonna work.
Well, you know...
433
00:18:43,450 --> 00:18:45,368
Ok, we've got fried chicken,
434
00:18:45,435 --> 00:18:47,336
biscuits and gravy,
435
00:18:47,404 --> 00:18:48,370
salad.
436
00:18:48,437 --> 00:18:49,437
Dig in.
437
00:18:50,272 --> 00:18:51,605
Everything looks great, honey.
438
00:18:51,673 --> 00:18:52,606
Thank you.
439
00:18:52,674 --> 00:18:54,241
Hear, hear. Bravo, Carrie.
440
00:18:55,776 --> 00:18:58,244
Becky, breast or thigh?
441
00:18:58,311 --> 00:19:01,212
Um, whatever you say.
442
00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:04,515
Oh, wow, Carrie, you've outdone
yourself with the salad...
443
00:19:04,583 --> 00:19:06,884
The pine nuts, the cheese.
444
00:19:06,951 --> 00:19:09,252
Douglas, why aren't
you having salad?
445
00:19:09,319 --> 00:19:11,804
Uh, uh, I'm not really
in the mood for salad.
446
00:19:11,871 --> 00:19:13,972
Have some. It's delicious.
447
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:15,674
No, thank you.
448
00:19:15,742 --> 00:19:19,127
Your wife has made
you salad with love.
449
00:19:19,195 --> 00:19:21,160
Eat it, you ungrateful bastard!
450
00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:30,534
Actually, dad,
451
00:19:31,436 --> 00:19:33,036
Becky made the salad.
452
00:19:33,772 --> 00:19:35,256
Oh, I see.
453
00:19:36,140 --> 00:19:39,408
Well, then, have a biscuit.
454
00:19:40,627 --> 00:19:42,544
Some of them came
out pretty well.
455
00:19:49,717 --> 00:19:50,917
Here, honey, I'll get that.
456
00:19:50,985 --> 00:19:52,151
No way.
457
00:19:52,219 --> 00:19:53,602
You made a delicious,
nurturing meal.
458
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,070
I'm cleaning up, ok?
459
00:19:55,138 --> 00:19:56,121
Yeah?
460
00:19:56,187 --> 00:19:58,522
Absolutely. I'm full here,
461
00:19:58,590 --> 00:20:01,675
but more importantly,
I'm full here.
462
00:20:17,671 --> 00:20:21,139
I can't believe he's never
seen the wizard of oz.
463
00:20:21,207 --> 00:20:24,225
So how you liking
it so far, dad?
464
00:20:24,361 --> 00:20:26,543
Is anyone else but me terrified?
465
00:20:31,983 --> 00:20:33,749
Who wants some more coffee?
466
00:20:33,817 --> 00:20:34,750
Uh, sure.
467
00:20:34,818 --> 00:20:36,252
Ok, I'll go make another pot.
468
00:20:52,381 --> 00:20:53,797
I can explain.
469
00:20:53,865 --> 00:20:55,132
Salad?
470
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:56,400
I was just, I wasn't...
471
00:20:56,468 --> 00:20:58,801
I... I could understand if
it was a piece of fudge,
472
00:20:58,869 --> 00:21:02,337
maybe a calzone, but a salad?
473
00:21:02,405 --> 00:21:05,806
You would do this
to me over a salad?
474
00:21:06,841 --> 00:21:08,608
I'm very weak.
475
00:21:08,676 --> 00:21:11,194
Ok, here's how it's
gonna go down.
476
00:21:11,262 --> 00:21:12,829
You're gonna clean
the blue cheese
477
00:21:12,897 --> 00:21:14,964
from underneath your
stubby little fingernails,
478
00:21:15,031 --> 00:21:16,632
then you're gonna
rinse out that bowl.
479
00:21:16,683 --> 00:21:19,000
If I see another piece of
that woman's tupperware
480
00:21:19,101 --> 00:21:21,001
in my kitchen again,
481
00:21:21,069 --> 00:21:22,903
I'll kill you both.
482
00:21:24,789 --> 00:21:26,188
What are you gonna
483
00:21:26,256 --> 00:21:28,123
whip one of your
biscuits at my head?
484
00:21:35,329 --> 00:21:36,513
Oh, God.
485
00:21:41,517 --> 00:21:42,751
Darling, come here.
486
00:21:42,818 --> 00:21:45,636
I've stumbled on a marvelous
television program.
487
00:21:45,704 --> 00:21:46,871
Oh, yeah?
488
00:21:46,938 --> 00:21:49,806
Yes, it's a period piece
about a simpler time.
489
00:21:49,874 --> 00:21:51,874
Let me bring you up to speed.
490
00:21:51,942 --> 00:21:55,210
The one in the leather
jacket is called "Fonzie."
34438
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