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♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
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00:00:04,571 --> 00:00:07,775
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:07,908 --> 00:00:11,679
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
4
00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:14,682
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,682 --> 00:00:18,118
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
6
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:21,288
♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do ♪
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00:00:21,388 --> 00:00:23,024
♪ All the things that make us ♪
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00:00:23,024 --> 00:00:24,291
♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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00:00:24,391 --> 00:00:30,230
♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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00:00:34,835 --> 00:00:37,371
Thanks for bringing us
to your company picnic, Peter.
11
00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:39,339
This is gonna be so much fun.
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00:00:39,339 --> 00:00:41,542
Yeah, I figured it's
finally time you guys put faces
13
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:44,145
to the people I've been bitching
about for the past eight years.
14
00:00:44,145 --> 00:00:46,447
Oop, there's charity 5K guy.
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00:00:46,447 --> 00:00:49,115
Let's run Lupus
out of town, huh, guys?
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00:00:50,851 --> 00:00:52,386
I work with Peter now.
17
00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:55,289
There's the guy who started
after me, and was beneath me,
18
00:00:55,289 --> 00:00:57,257
but now he's, like,
higher up than I am.
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00:00:57,257 --> 00:00:59,759
- Hey, Bob.
- Hey, Darren.
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00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:05,099
Thank you all for coming
to today's picnic.
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00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:08,202
Now, for our main event:
the aerial ovum transfer,
22
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:11,305
or, as it's sometimes known,
the egg toss.
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00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:13,373
This year, as a special prize,
24
00:01:13,373 --> 00:01:15,576
the winning team
will receive a five-night stay
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00:01:15,676 --> 00:01:18,446
at my vacation home
in Mooseattackee, Maine.
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00:01:18,546 --> 00:01:20,648
With miles of trails,
it is one of Maine's
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00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:22,449
premiere hiking destinations.
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00:01:22,549 --> 00:01:24,851
And you're only
a short bike ride away
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00:01:24,851 --> 00:01:26,486
from its quaint downtown.
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00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:31,025
Let your cares melt away as you
paddle across serene Lake June.
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00:01:31,025 --> 00:01:33,093
Peter, that place
in Maine is amazing.
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It looks
like a Stephen King book
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00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,830
before anything bad happens.
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00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:39,033
Hi, Gary, how's it going?
How's Brenda?
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00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:42,135
Oh, she's great.
Uh, just alive, super alive.
36
00:01:42,135 --> 00:01:44,671
- How are the boys?
- Yep, all alive.
37
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,373
Children and pets all alive
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00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:48,875
and acting
like normal children and pets.
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00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:51,145
That's great.
H-Hey, have you met
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00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:53,413
that new stranger from not here?
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00:01:53,413 --> 00:01:56,449
Nope.
See you tomorrow definitely.
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00:01:59,386 --> 00:02:01,155
Peter,
we got to win this vacation,
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00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:02,989
but there are
so many other teams.
44
00:02:03,089 --> 00:02:05,259
Relax, Lois.
I brought a hard-boiled egg,
45
00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:07,428
so while all the other teams
are getting eliminated,
46
00:02:07,428 --> 00:02:09,763
we can just play
an "angry dad" game of catch.
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00:02:09,864 --> 00:02:12,699
So the school called to say
they found pot in your locker.
48
00:02:12,699 --> 00:02:14,335
You want to tell me about that?
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00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:17,204
Ow! I-I'm not sure
what we're doing, Peter.
50
00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:19,506
So how's that summer job hunt
coming?
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00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:22,610
I don't think they're hiring
in front of the TV all day.
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00:02:22,710 --> 00:02:25,112
Ow! That's too hard.
53
00:02:25,112 --> 00:02:26,546
You know what else is hard?
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00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,749
Waking up next to a woman
you no longer love.
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00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:30,250
Try that on for size.
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00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:36,056
Peter, they've all
been eliminated.
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00:02:36,056 --> 00:02:38,926
The game is over,
but I think we should talk.
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00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:41,795
Yes! The Griffins
are going to Maine.
59
00:02:41,795 --> 00:02:43,797
And if that isn't
the perfect promo
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00:02:43,897 --> 00:02:46,500
for the middle of a meaningless
Vikings-Packers game,
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00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,801
I don't know what is.
62
00:02:47,902 --> 00:02:51,171
And the players
have gathered around Clark.
63
00:02:51,272 --> 00:02:54,541
And we can only hope that
his injury wasn't too serious
64
00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:58,279
and we start to see some
movement in those extremities.
65
00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:01,248
And while we have
this break in the action,
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00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:04,184
this Sunday
on an all-new Family Guy,
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00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,254
the Griffins are going to Maine.
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00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:11,491
On right after
an all-new Bob's Burgers.
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00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,630
A family vacation in Maine.
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00:03:16,630 --> 00:03:20,000
My monogrammed canvas bag
is gonna be so excited.
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00:03:20,101 --> 00:03:21,635
You said it, Lois.
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00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:24,138
I can't wait to get stuffed
with old sunscreens
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00:03:24,138 --> 00:03:26,140
and emergency tampons.
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00:03:26,140 --> 00:03:28,108
Yo, a pool table?
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00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:31,011
Hell ya! I'm gonna be
gettin' all up in that.
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00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:34,382
How does one get
"all up in" a pool table?
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00:03:34,482 --> 00:03:36,517
And, wow, look,
it's bigger than I thought.
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00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:38,018
So many bedrooms.
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00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:39,253
Yeah, with all that extra space,
80
00:03:39,353 --> 00:03:40,321
we could invite
our friends along.
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00:03:40,488 --> 00:03:43,023
Quagmire, Joe and Bonnie,
Cleveland and his family.
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00:03:43,124 --> 00:03:44,891
- The whole gang could come.
- Really?
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00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:47,127
Do you think
everyone would enjoy it?
84
00:03:47,127 --> 00:03:49,030
Lois, do you know
what's up in Maine?
85
00:03:49,030 --> 00:03:50,497
Art's Trading Post.
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00:03:50,497 --> 00:03:52,266
Ever since I was a kid,
I wanted to go up there
87
00:03:52,266 --> 00:03:53,700
to see the trained bear show.
88
00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,936
They ride bikes,
they wear Dracula fangs--
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00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:57,671
seasonally--
and then there's one part
90
00:03:57,771 --> 00:04:00,273
where Nipsy the brown bear
pretends to smoke a cigar.
91
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:02,009
And I'm not even kidding.
92
00:04:02,109 --> 00:04:03,510
Ah, I don't know, Peter.
93
00:04:03,611 --> 00:04:05,512
It's a lot of people
under one roof.
94
00:04:05,512 --> 00:04:07,714
Come on, Lois,
this is our big chance
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00:04:07,714 --> 00:04:09,617
to yell at kids who aren't ours.
96
00:04:09,617 --> 00:04:11,151
You know what? Let's do it.
97
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:12,853
I think Bonnie's gained
five pounds,
98
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,387
and I want to see her
in a swimsuit.
99
00:04:14,387 --> 00:04:17,257
While we're on the subject
of Mrs. Swanson and swimsuits,
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00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,626
question:
if Mrs. Swanson goes swimming,
101
00:04:19,626 --> 00:04:21,895
then hangs her bathing suit
to dry in the bathroom,
102
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:24,130
am I allowed to wring
the water into a cup?
103
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:25,832
- And do what with it?
- Irrelevant.
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00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:28,035
Do not concern yourself
with what happens to the water
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00:04:28,035 --> 00:04:30,738
once it's in the cup.
Am I allowed?
106
00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:32,906
Uh, I'm gonna say no.
107
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:35,709
All right, well, the guy
from Reddit already paid
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00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,611
for the water, but I'll--
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00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:39,746
I'll figure something out.
110
00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:55,696
I've been waiting a long time
for this trip, Brian.
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00:04:55,696 --> 00:04:57,264
To come to Maine? Huh.
112
00:04:57,264 --> 00:04:58,999
I didn't think you were much
of an outdoorsman.
113
00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:00,735
The outdoors
can get stuffed.
114
00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:02,236
We're near Kennebunkport,
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00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:04,104
home of the Bush family compound
116
00:05:04,205 --> 00:05:06,106
and,
according to Dowdy magazine,
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00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:08,208
the very place
where Barbara Bush picked
118
00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:10,077
that one haircut 40 years ago
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00:05:10,077 --> 00:05:11,945
and never looked back. See?
120
00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:14,481
The perfect, coiffed, lady fro.
121
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:16,850
I hear tell that she brought
a Quaker Oats box
122
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:19,119
into the salon and said, "This."
123
00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:21,855
Uh-oh, no pavement,
lot of rocks and roots.
124
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:24,191
Good thing Joe brought his
125
00:05:24,291 --> 00:05:26,159
new off-road tires!
126
00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:28,194
I didn't pack the tires.
127
00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:30,230
Oh.
128
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:31,899
Nuts.
129
00:05:32,032 --> 00:05:33,734
All right, gang,
time to head inside.
130
00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:35,035
Now one quick heads-up.
131
00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:37,170
Every room has a lake view
except one.
132
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,372
Somebody's gonna have
to look out
133
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:40,874
over that girls' volleyball camp
next door.
134
00:05:40,975 --> 00:05:43,743
Nice serve, Stacy.
135
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:50,517
What did I tell ya, Lois?
136
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:52,419
Look at
all those big smiles and--
137
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:56,123
Cleveland Jr., no wet feet
on the hardwood floor!
138
00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:58,091
This is gonna be a great week.
139
00:05:58,091 --> 00:06:00,027
Hey, Peter,
will you call your boss?
140
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:02,262
For what? I don't want
to bug him already.
141
00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:04,264
He wrote the Wi-Fi password
in a font
142
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:07,467
where the big letter I's and the
L juniors are the same thing.
143
00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,403
I can't make
heads or tails of it.
144
00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:12,105
Are you calling Preston?
Ask him about the towel sitch.
145
00:06:12,105 --> 00:06:14,374
I could only find three
and you're gonna need those
146
00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:16,443
to clean the soda off
the pool table.
147
00:06:16,443 --> 00:06:18,946
We already spilled
on the pool table?
148
00:06:18,946 --> 00:06:21,382
Yeah, Meg was really
gettin' all up in it.
149
00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:24,318
Hey, Peter? Uh, someone
either laid a giant turd
150
00:06:24,318 --> 00:06:26,753
or tried to flush
a russet potato down the toilet.
151
00:06:26,853 --> 00:06:28,421
It's totally clogged.
152
00:06:30,991 --> 00:06:34,428
And Clark, still unresponsive,
153
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:39,132
being carted off the field
and into an ambulance.
154
00:06:39,132 --> 00:06:44,037
This week's Family Guy:
someone lays a giant turd.
155
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:53,080
It's the single largest
defecate I ever saw.
156
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,849
Should we try flushing it
again as a show of force?
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00:06:55,982 --> 00:06:58,518
Nah, Chris,
that'll only make it angry.
158
00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:01,121
Okay, here's the situation:
a stubborn BM
159
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:02,923
is blocking up our main toilet.
160
00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:05,025
I can't find a plunger,
so whoever did it
161
00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:06,893
needs to get in there
with a dishwashing glove
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00:07:06,893 --> 00:07:09,029
and punch it through.
So who was it?
163
00:07:10,831 --> 00:07:14,201
Say, Chris, that looks like a
fresh rim of sweat on your hat.
164
00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:16,536
Wouldn't happen to be
"pushing sweat," would it?
165
00:07:16,636 --> 00:07:19,340
What? No!
I was reading a chapter book.
166
00:07:19,340 --> 00:07:21,608
Meg, you're generally gross.
167
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:23,276
Anything you want to fess up to?
168
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:26,147
Nope. I'm "dogging it"
this month for the environment.
169
00:07:26,247 --> 00:07:28,115
That means I only go outside.
170
00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:29,416
Saves water, feeds the soil,
171
00:07:29,416 --> 00:07:31,718
turns a few heads
at the same time.
172
00:07:31,718 --> 00:07:33,420
Okay, this is disgusting.
173
00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:35,155
D-Does it really matter
who did it?
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00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:36,890
I'd kind of like to know.
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00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,858
Yeah, we should
at least make sure
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00:07:38,858 --> 00:07:40,527
they don't need
medical attention.
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00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:42,596
Well, I'd like to get on
with my vacation.
178
00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:44,865
There's got to be a plunger
around here somewhere.
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00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:46,367
Peter, come on, help me look.
180
00:07:46,367 --> 00:07:48,836
Okay, listen up,
we don't have much time.
181
00:07:48,836 --> 00:07:50,871
It was me, Peter.
I clogged the toilet.
182
00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:53,541
That was you?
How is that even possible?
183
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,110
It was all
that fiber-y mom cereal
184
00:07:56,110 --> 00:07:57,544
The View told us to eat.
185
00:07:57,644 --> 00:08:00,414
That turd has Joy Behar's
fingerprints all over it.
186
00:08:00,414 --> 00:08:03,017
But I need you
to take the fall for me.
187
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,718
Uh, I don't know, Lois.
188
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:06,587
Even for a husky guy like me,
189
00:08:06,587 --> 00:08:07,988
it's shamefully large.
190
00:08:08,122 --> 00:08:10,291
I know!
That's why I need your help.
191
00:08:10,291 --> 00:08:12,392
That is not a poop
a woman can come back from.
192
00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:14,294
Look, you take the blame,
and I'll let you
193
00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:16,229
get two souvenirs
at the bear show.
194
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:18,965
It's not gonna be, like,
like, like, books, is it?
195
00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:20,267
No.
196
00:08:20,267 --> 00:08:22,136
All right, everybody, listen up.
197
00:08:22,136 --> 00:08:24,071
I'm the one
who clogged the toilet.
198
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:28,675
Oh, great! As if that
little slug of yours
199
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,110
isn't embarrassing enough.
200
00:08:30,211 --> 00:08:32,246
Sorry, I have
to make this believable.
201
00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:34,148
- So it's big?
- Let's...
202
00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:37,250
let's just
get through this, huh?
203
00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:44,190
♪ Gig-gig-giggity ♪
204
00:08:44,290 --> 00:08:46,260
♪ Gig-gig-giggity, gig-gig,
giggity, gee-gee ♪
205
00:08:46,260 --> 00:08:48,162
♪ Gig-gig-giggity
gig-gig-giggity, gee-gee. ♪
206
00:08:48,162 --> 00:08:50,330
What the hell is happening?!
207
00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:52,199
Life, Peter.
That's what's happening.
208
00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:54,301
I've put together
a whole itinerary of adventures
209
00:08:54,301 --> 00:08:56,870
- for our week.
- Wow, this is very detailed.
210
00:08:56,970 --> 00:09:00,574
"6:27, read '6:27'
on daily schedule."
211
00:09:00,675 --> 00:09:02,176
Right on schedule.
212
00:09:02,176 --> 00:09:04,245
Hey, why's some of this stuff
highlighted in green,
213
00:09:04,345 --> 00:09:06,113
but my bear show is in yellow?
214
00:09:06,113 --> 00:09:07,848
Because the bear show
is priority yellow.
215
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:10,984
A bear, a bear show
would never be priority green.
216
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:13,354
All right, as long
as it's on there, I guess.
217
00:09:13,354 --> 00:09:15,989
Now to put on a pair of shorts
I never wear at home,
218
00:09:16,089 --> 00:09:19,292
but packed for vacation,
hoping they'd magically fit.
219
00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:31,105
Let's just pack
220
00:09:31,105 --> 00:09:33,006
the stuff we're sure fits.
221
00:09:36,477 --> 00:09:37,711
You guys smell that?
222
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:39,046
You smell that air?
223
00:09:41,848 --> 00:09:43,750
Peter, you still back there?
224
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,252
I don't hear you
smelling that air.
225
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:47,354
Yeah, I'm here.
226
00:09:47,354 --> 00:09:49,389
I'm just having a hard time
on the one bike
227
00:09:49,489 --> 00:09:51,258
that was stored
under the deck all winter
228
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:53,760
instead of in the garage.
229
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,462
We've been at this all morning.
230
00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:57,164
Is it time to go
to the bear show yet?
231
00:09:57,298 --> 00:09:58,799
Soon, Peter. But before that,
232
00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:02,102
the itinerary has us going
to a must-visit local market
233
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:05,105
that no local
has ever stepped foot in.
234
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:08,742
Now, be sure to put
your bikes down in a place
235
00:10:08,842 --> 00:10:12,078
that blocks the path of people
just trying to live their lives.
236
00:10:15,215 --> 00:10:18,219
We're doing vacation
really good, you guys.
237
00:10:18,219 --> 00:10:20,354
God, I hate these stores.
238
00:10:20,354 --> 00:10:22,122
They're so tiny, so the owner's
239
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,824
right on top of you
the whole time.
240
00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:25,693
- Can I wrap that for you?
- Hoda Kotb!
241
00:10:25,793 --> 00:10:28,195
Oh, you're such a tourist.
Here, follow my lead.
242
00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:30,363
You know how it's
typically rude to talk
243
00:10:30,464 --> 00:10:32,632
- to people about their finances?
- Yeah.
244
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,935
Well, in a small town market,
you can come right out
245
00:10:35,035 --> 00:10:37,737
and ask the owner if he makes
enough money to feed his family.
246
00:10:37,737 --> 00:10:40,107
You just have to do it
in the voice white ladies use
247
00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,376
with people
who don't speak English.
248
00:10:42,376 --> 00:10:45,012
Was it a good tourist season,
249
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,281
or will your children
go without?
250
00:10:47,281 --> 00:10:49,950
This business you've
dedicated your life to
251
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:51,885
is very cute to me.
252
00:10:52,018 --> 00:10:53,820
Isn't this fun, Peter?
253
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:57,024
Now don't forget to say "bye"
like the world's biggest ass.
254
00:10:57,124 --> 00:11:01,495
Bye! Buh-bye, bye.
255
00:11:04,398 --> 00:11:06,466
How are those burgers
coming along?
256
00:11:06,466 --> 00:11:07,501
Fine, I guess.
257
00:11:07,501 --> 00:11:09,970
Well, thanks for
volunteering to cook.
258
00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:11,105
I didn't volunteer.
259
00:11:11,105 --> 00:11:12,606
Everyone just
called me "Grill Master"
260
00:11:12,707 --> 00:11:13,908
until I submitted.
261
00:11:13,908 --> 00:11:16,643
Spoken like
a true grill master.
262
00:11:16,743 --> 00:11:18,912
Whatever. Hey, everybody,
we got to eat quick
263
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:20,547
if we're gonna
catch the bear show.
264
00:11:20,547 --> 00:11:23,283
They're kept on a Robitussin
and Zoloft-heavy diet,
265
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,752
so they fall asleep
pretty early.
266
00:11:24,752 --> 00:11:27,721
Okay, I'll tell Chris.
He's down at the dock fishing.
267
00:11:27,721 --> 00:11:30,390
There he is, the bait master.
268
00:11:30,491 --> 00:11:33,727
I think I misunderstood
the assignment.
269
00:11:33,727 --> 00:11:35,295
Well, let's see what you caught.
270
00:11:35,295 --> 00:11:37,731
I wouldn't look in the bucket.
271
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:44,771
I'm sorry,
we closed 20 minutes ago.
272
00:11:44,771 --> 00:11:47,140
What? Wait a minute,
if you closed 20 minutes ago,
273
00:11:47,241 --> 00:11:48,742
why are you just
flipping the sign now?
274
00:11:48,842 --> 00:11:50,410
Owner said
I had to wait to flip it
275
00:11:50,510 --> 00:11:52,146
until it would
devastate a fat guy.
276
00:11:52,246 --> 00:11:55,015
I told him he was crazy,
but you look pretty upset.
277
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:56,617
That's why he's the boss.
278
00:11:56,617 --> 00:11:58,118
What's going on, Peter?
279
00:11:58,118 --> 00:11:59,786
They're closed,
that's what's going on.
280
00:11:59,786 --> 00:12:02,022
And now we got to come
all the way back here tomorrow.
281
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:03,791
Oh, we're actually
closed permanently.
282
00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:06,760
After decades of very valid
animal cruelty complaints,
283
00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:08,496
it was easier to
shut down than to
284
00:12:08,496 --> 00:12:10,731
keep cleaning fake PETA blood
off our clothes.
285
00:12:10,731 --> 00:12:11,832
I'm sorry, what?
286
00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:13,400
Yeah, honestly, it's a miracle
287
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:14,935
they let us go
as long as we did.
288
00:12:14,935 --> 00:12:17,371
There's not a single license
or permit for this whole thing.
289
00:12:17,471 --> 00:12:21,008
One day, we just started
putting bears on pogo sticks
290
00:12:21,108 --> 00:12:22,710
and no one ever told us to stop.
291
00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,111
This can't be happening.
292
00:12:24,111 --> 00:12:26,080
Sorry, you should've
been here earlier
293
00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,315
for the bear flash sale.
I was strapping 'em to
294
00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,450
people's cars
like Christmas trees.
295
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:32,118
See, that guy got one.
296
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,123
By the end,
we didn't even charge people.
297
00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,125
We were just
giving the bears away.
298
00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,760
Just giving the bears away.
299
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:42,696
Just giving the bears away.
Just giving the bears away.
300
00:12:44,498 --> 00:12:46,567
Sorry you didn't
see the bears, Peter,
301
00:12:46,667 --> 00:12:49,737
but Quagmire has us going
blueberry-picking tomorrow.
302
00:12:49,837 --> 00:12:51,138
Maybe you'll see a bear then.
303
00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:53,373
I do not want to
see a wild bear, Lois.
304
00:12:53,473 --> 00:12:55,476
I want to see
a unicycle bear in a fez.
305
00:12:55,476 --> 00:12:57,477
You know,
I still don't really get it.
306
00:12:57,577 --> 00:12:59,046
A bear on a unicycle?
307
00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:00,247
It sounds kind of dumb.
308
00:13:00,347 --> 00:13:02,283
It's not dumb. It's hilarious
309
00:13:02,383 --> 00:13:04,918
and it's the only thing
I wanted to do this entire trip.
310
00:13:05,018 --> 00:13:06,387
You know,
if I remember correctly,
311
00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:08,355
part of our deal was
I get two souvenirs
312
00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:10,257
from the bear show.
Well, I'm looking around
313
00:13:10,357 --> 00:13:13,060
and I don't see
any plastic bear heads on sticks
314
00:13:13,060 --> 00:13:14,394
that I can make bite things.
315
00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:16,830
That means I get to
tell everyone it was you
316
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:17,865
who clogged the toilet.
317
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:21,302
Lois, that was you?
318
00:13:21,302 --> 00:13:23,136
But it had such a man stink.
319
00:13:23,236 --> 00:13:24,972
You know what, Donna?
Going in the bathroom after you
320
00:13:24,972 --> 00:13:26,807
ain't exactly a walk
through the rose garden,
321
00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:28,142
so I'd be quiet right about now.
322
00:13:28,142 --> 00:13:29,509
Don't listen to him, Donna.
323
00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:32,480
We think your movements smell
very lady-like.
324
00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:33,613
Isn't that right, kids?
325
00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:35,849
Oh, of course, 'cause
you all agree on everything.
326
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:38,084
Just the perfect family,
aren't you?
327
00:13:38,084 --> 00:13:40,120
News flash:
Normal families fight
328
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:42,155
and like spending time
away from each other.
329
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:45,259
Sir? Sir? I'm gonna need you
to calm down, sir.
330
00:13:45,359 --> 00:13:47,127
Stop acting like
a real cop, Joe.
331
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:48,495
Your right leg is in a knot.
332
00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:50,030
Uh, yeah,
333
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:51,098
they got a little tangled
334
00:13:51,098 --> 00:13:52,466
when Bonnie dipped me
335
00:13:52,466 --> 00:13:53,700
in the lake.
336
00:13:53,700 --> 00:13:56,103
God, I can't believe I thought
it'd be a good idea
337
00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:57,371
to bring you people
on this trip.
338
00:13:57,371 --> 00:13:59,440
The only reason I still
talk to any of you
339
00:13:59,540 --> 00:14:00,574
is 'cause
we live on the same street.
340
00:14:00,741 --> 00:14:03,978
And after this week, I am
seriously considering a move.
341
00:14:03,978 --> 00:14:07,247
Peter, Peter. I'm sorry,
but 7:05 sunset,
342
00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:09,416
so I need to simulate more
trumpet songs with "giggity."
343
00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:12,686
♪ Giggity ♪
344
00:14:12,686 --> 00:14:15,088
♪ Giggity. ♪
345
00:14:15,088 --> 00:14:16,257
Give me that thing.
346
00:14:16,257 --> 00:14:18,159
Oh, no.
How will you distract yourself
347
00:14:18,159 --> 00:14:20,027
from the fact that
you're gonna die alone
348
00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,729
without your precious itinerary?
349
00:14:21,829 --> 00:14:23,330
- Whoa.
- Aah! Son of a--
350
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:39,446
Oh, my God. The cabin's on fire.
351
00:14:39,446 --> 00:14:40,547
Heavens.
352
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:49,823
Hey, thanks for coming out.
Guess all that's left to do
353
00:14:49,823 --> 00:14:51,058
is get a picture of me
in the truck
354
00:14:51,158 --> 00:14:53,493
and, uh, you fellas
can be on your way.
355
00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:56,563
Oh, God, look at this place.
356
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:58,699
If Preston finds out
I torched his house,
357
00:14:58,699 --> 00:14:59,900
I'm screwed, you guys.
358
00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:01,568
We got to fix this fast.
359
00:15:02,570 --> 00:15:04,238
But I'm sure it's nothing
360
00:15:04,338 --> 00:15:06,740
a resourceful group of
best friends like us
361
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:07,774
can't handle, right?
362
00:15:11,678 --> 00:15:14,648
Look, I know Peter said
some very mean things,
363
00:15:14,648 --> 00:15:17,618
but what's important right now
is that no one was hurt.
364
00:15:17,618 --> 00:15:19,420
That's not entirely true, Lois.
365
00:15:19,420 --> 00:15:22,756
Your reusable grocery bags
didn't make it.
366
00:15:22,756 --> 00:15:24,224
What?
367
00:15:24,224 --> 00:15:27,194
Your bags, they were
lost in the fire.
368
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:29,196
No. No.
369
00:15:29,296 --> 00:15:30,364
No!
370
00:15:31,732 --> 00:15:32,866
You son of a bitch,
371
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,001
Peter Griffin!
372
00:15:34,001 --> 00:15:35,802
What have you done?
373
00:15:35,902 --> 00:15:37,538
I will never
forgive you for this.
374
00:15:37,538 --> 00:15:38,872
Do you hear me?
375
00:15:38,872 --> 00:15:42,409
I will never forgive you.
376
00:15:47,882 --> 00:15:50,117
Well, Peter,
you made it crystal clear
377
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:53,286
we're no longer wanted,
so we'll leave you be.
378
00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,122
Yeah, you can deal with
this mess on your own.
379
00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:57,057
Let's go, everybody.
380
00:16:03,964 --> 00:16:05,166
Why aren't we moving?
381
00:16:05,166 --> 00:16:06,634
We got to wait for Joe
382
00:16:06,634 --> 00:16:07,834
to back out of the driveway
383
00:16:07,834 --> 00:16:09,369
'cause he pulled in last.
384
00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:12,305
Sorry. If I knew you were doing
a big, dramatic exit,
385
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:15,142
I would've rearranged the cars
this morning.
386
00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:17,978
You mind if I wait till I'm
all the way in to tell you off?
387
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:20,180
Yeah, that's fine.
388
00:16:26,587 --> 00:16:28,589
Shame on you, Peter.
389
00:16:28,722 --> 00:16:29,823
It is people like you who--
390
00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:31,992
Go!
391
00:16:35,762 --> 00:16:37,097
All right, Peter, don't panic.
392
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:38,565
You got till the end of
the week to fix this.
393
00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:41,802
Maybe there's an online
tutorial that'll help.
394
00:16:41,802 --> 00:16:43,204
What's going on, guys?
395
00:16:43,204 --> 00:16:45,238
I'm Corey, from "Corey's World."
396
00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:47,340
Today I'm gonna show you
how to patch a big hole
397
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,810
in your boss's cabin.
Here's what you'll need:
398
00:16:49,810 --> 00:16:52,279
A drywall saw, tape measure...
399
00:16:52,279 --> 00:16:53,280
Shoot, what did he say?
400
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,015
Turn off the power so you don't
401
00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:57,718
drill into a live wire
like my stepdad Todd.
402
00:16:57,718 --> 00:16:59,153
Now our spoons move
403
00:16:59,153 --> 00:17:00,387
when he walks in the kitchen.
404
00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:01,255
To do that...
405
00:17:01,255 --> 00:17:03,590
Gerbils can't sing opera.
406
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:04,658
Damn it, Peter, focus.
407
00:17:04,658 --> 00:17:06,127
Your job is on the lin--
408
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:15,536
Aw, touché,
"Recommended Videos."
409
00:17:15,536 --> 00:17:17,371
I know you're leading me
down a rabbit hole
410
00:17:17,371 --> 00:17:20,474
to ISIS beheadings,
but this was a bull's-eye.
411
00:17:22,243 --> 00:17:24,478
Preston. I wasn't
expecting to hear from you
412
00:17:24,578 --> 00:17:25,479
for a couple of days.
413
00:17:25,579 --> 00:17:27,113
Yes, well, I realized
414
00:17:27,113 --> 00:17:29,716
I only provided three towels
for the entire cabin,
415
00:17:29,816 --> 00:17:31,918
so I'm on my way
to deliver more.
416
00:17:31,918 --> 00:17:34,521
Oh, you don't have to come all
the way up here just for that.
417
00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:36,090
Unfortunately, I do.
418
00:17:36,090 --> 00:17:38,893
My OCD won't allow me to stop...
clicking
419
00:17:38,993 --> 00:17:41,162
until the cabin has 15 towels.
420
00:17:41,162 --> 00:17:42,629
Well, I should let you go.
421
00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:45,232
A new car is in front of me
and I need to...
422
00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:48,001
do math problems
with its license plate number.
423
00:17:52,273 --> 00:17:54,407
All right, everything I need to
get out of this mess
424
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:56,844
is right here.
Power drill, level,
425
00:17:56,844 --> 00:17:58,645
circular saw. Perfect.
426
00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,981
How can Preston fire me
427
00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,649
if he can't get inside?
428
00:18:03,851 --> 00:18:05,286
Ah! My defenses are down.
429
00:18:05,286 --> 00:18:06,620
Oh, no.
430
00:18:06,620 --> 00:18:07,955
He's here.
431
00:18:07,955 --> 00:18:10,323
Well, I guess it's time to
face the music.
432
00:18:14,394 --> 00:18:15,830
What are you guys doing here?
433
00:18:15,930 --> 00:18:17,731
We came back to help you, Peter.
434
00:18:17,831 --> 00:18:19,400
And it's not just us.
435
00:18:25,739 --> 00:18:26,706
Did we time it right?
436
00:18:26,706 --> 00:18:28,108
Did you say "not just us"
437
00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:29,744
before we pulled over
the horizon?
438
00:18:29,744 --> 00:18:31,178
Yeah, it was perfect.
439
00:18:31,178 --> 00:18:32,847
Yes. That is why we practiced
440
00:18:32,847 --> 00:18:34,114
in the Walmart parking lot.
441
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:36,083
But I was
such a jerk to all of you.
442
00:18:36,083 --> 00:18:37,384
Why would you help me now?
443
00:18:37,384 --> 00:18:39,620
Lois says you were the one
pushing to
444
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,055
invite us on the trip at all.
445
00:18:41,055 --> 00:18:42,523
Called us your best friends.
446
00:18:42,523 --> 00:18:43,557
And we should've
made a better effort to
447
00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:46,226
get to your bear show,
instead of making the trip
448
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:47,527
all about what we wanted to do.
449
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,529
Yeah, and we left without
any of our chargers.
450
00:18:49,529 --> 00:18:52,166
If it was just the blocks,
you know, big whoop-dee-doo,
451
00:18:52,266 --> 00:18:54,001
but it was the wires, too.
452
00:18:54,001 --> 00:18:55,469
So, what do you say?
453
00:18:55,469 --> 00:18:57,671
Can we help you
fix the cabin, Peter?
454
00:18:58,672 --> 00:18:59,740
I'd like that.
455
00:18:59,873 --> 00:19:00,907
Now, let's go chop down
456
00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:02,343
some ancient pine trees
457
00:19:02,343 --> 00:19:04,845
to save this millionaire's
vacation home.
458
00:19:04,845 --> 00:19:06,446
Yeah!
459
00:19:08,048 --> 00:19:11,318
The chimney has proved stalwart.
460
00:19:12,186 --> 00:19:13,754
Well, that's Preston.
461
00:19:13,854 --> 00:19:15,322
I'm sorry for what I said.
462
00:19:15,423 --> 00:19:18,125
Only true friends would come
back to help the way you did,
463
00:19:18,125 --> 00:19:19,860
and that's all that matters.
464
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:21,896
True friends will also stay
465
00:19:21,996 --> 00:19:23,998
to watch their friend get fired.
466
00:19:24,098 --> 00:19:25,699
Thanks, guys.
467
00:19:25,699 --> 00:19:27,101
I'll probably cry.
468
00:19:27,101 --> 00:19:30,003
That's okay.
It'll make a better TikTok.
469
00:19:30,103 --> 00:19:31,338
Griffin, what the hell?
470
00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:33,774
My cabin.
It's completely destroyed.
471
00:19:33,774 --> 00:19:37,377
I'm so sorry, Preston,
472
00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:39,646
but you got to know this was
completely my fault.
473
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,948
My friends and family
were the perfect guests,
474
00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:43,184
and they had
nothing to do with it.
475
00:19:43,184 --> 00:19:44,584
If you want to fire me,
476
00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:46,086
or issue some Maine justice
477
00:19:46,086 --> 00:19:47,888
and clamp some lobsters
to my nipples,
478
00:19:47,888 --> 00:19:49,489
I understand.
479
00:19:51,725 --> 00:19:53,627
Peter, you don't understand.
480
00:19:53,627 --> 00:19:54,995
I hate it up here.
481
00:19:55,095 --> 00:19:57,530
The small-town pace,
the pressure to relax,
482
00:19:57,530 --> 00:20:00,300
the barn owl that pushed
my wife down a staircase.
483
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:02,870
I don't get it.
Then why have the cabin at all?
484
00:20:02,970 --> 00:20:05,472
An address in Maine
allowed me to establish
485
00:20:05,472 --> 00:20:09,143
an ethically dubious, but
technically legal shell company.
486
00:20:09,243 --> 00:20:10,610
But now,
with the money I'll save
487
00:20:10,610 --> 00:20:13,447
from taking a casualty deduction
on the destroyed property,
488
00:20:13,447 --> 00:20:15,148
I won't need that.
489
00:20:18,485 --> 00:20:20,988
Hey, Preston,
I know the cabin's a mess,
490
00:20:20,988 --> 00:20:23,123
but we still got
three days in the prize week.
491
00:20:23,123 --> 00:20:26,126
Could we finish out our trip
here in Maine? Together?
492
00:20:26,126 --> 00:20:27,728
I don't see why not.
493
00:20:33,700 --> 00:20:36,236
A day and a half
is probably enough.
494
00:20:42,009 --> 00:20:43,276
Well, we had our troubles,
495
00:20:43,376 --> 00:20:46,379
but I'm glad we're back at home,
safe and sound.
496
00:20:46,379 --> 00:20:49,149
Peter, what are you talking
about? This is all a dream.
497
00:20:49,149 --> 00:20:51,985
You had a stress heart attack
during the egg toss.
498
00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:58,191
Poor Darren.
35632
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