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1
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[CHUCKLES]
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[SPITS]
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Bah! Rubbish!
4
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[DOOR OPENS]
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Hey, hold on. Who are you?
6
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I'm Wally Boag.
I'm the guest on tonight's Muppet Show.
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Wally Boag! Balloon animals!
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Why, I haven't seen you in a long time,
old buddy. Remember me? Pops.
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Sorry, afraid I don't.
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Sure you do.
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You always called me Pops while I was the
doorman at the old Bijou in Pittsburgh.
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Must have been someone else.
I've never been to Pittsburgh.
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It must have been someone else.
Well, sorry.
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I wanted to give the guy back
the ten dollars he loaned me.
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Oh, that Pops!
Good to see you again, Pops.
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It's The Muppet Show, with our very
special guest star, Wally Boag. Yay!
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[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
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♪ It's time to play the music ♪
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♪ It's time to light the lights ♪
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♪ It's time to meet the Muppets
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
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♪ It's time to put on makeup ♪
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♪ It's time to dress up right ♪
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♪ It's time to raise the curtain
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
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♪ Why do we always come here? ♪
25
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♪ I guess we'll never know ♪
26
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♪ It's like a kind of torture ♪
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♪ To have to watch this show ♪
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♪ But now let's get things started ♪
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♪ Why don't you get things started? ♪
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♪ It's time to get things started
On the most sensational, inspirational ♪
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♪ Celebrational, Muppetational ♪
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♪ This is what we call ♪
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♪ The Muppet Show ♪
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Thank you, thank you. Hi-ho,
and welcome again to The Muppet Show.
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As you know, every week we try to do
a real old-fashioned vaudeville show.
36
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Well, this week, we're going to succeed.
37
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That's because in the wings is that
master vaudevillian and king of comedy,
38
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Mr. Wally Boag.
39
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Yes! So, here for openers
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are the Flying Zucchini Brothers
and their human cannonball act! Yay!
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Yeah, boom-ah boom-ah! Boom-ah boom-ah!
42
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Ladies and gentlemen, now for the
Zucchini Brothers' famous cannonball act.
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Brothers, squish down into your cannons,
and point them to the heavens.
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Ah-squishy squishy.
45
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And now, ladies and gentlemen,
get ready for the big boom-ah boom-ah.
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Brothers, signal when ready.
47
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Luigi.
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Luigi, ready.
49
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Marco, ready.
50
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Lorenzo, ready.
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Giuseppe, ready.
52
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Heathcliff, I'm ready, mama.
53
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And now, ladies and gentlemen,
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the Zucchini Brothers'
five-man cannonball boom-ah boom-ah.
55
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Is that it? Is the act over?
56
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Hey, it's a little short, fellas.
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Uh, close the curtain.
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Quick, change the scenery.
59
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Moving right along, ladies and gentlemen,
Lottie Lemon and her Singing Wig.
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♪ Treat me sweet and gentle ♪
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♪ When you say good night ♪
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♪ Just squeeze me ♪
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♪ But please don't tease me ♪
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[SCREAMS]
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Poor Lottie Lemon.
I hope someone knows first aid.
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Forget first aid, Lottie needs lemonade.
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According to the Guinness Book of Records,
on July 17, 1955,
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Wally Boag opened
the Golden Horseshoe Revue in Disneyland.
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He's been doing five shows a day there
ever since.
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A total of over 32,000 performances.
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AUDIENCE:
Whoo!
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Yes. So having achieved this feat,
he's decided to tempt fate
73
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and try to make it through
one performance on The Muppet Show.
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So here he is, ladies and gentlemen,
the amazing Wally Boag! Yeah!
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Here I am, your traveling salesman.
76
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-Hi, Hermit.
-Kermit.
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[CHUCKLES]
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Great.
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What have I got for sale? Let me take
a look in my purse. I've got balloons.
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I had balloons. Oh, well.
Is there a psychiatrist in the house?
81
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Nothing personal, it's just that
I have a new theory in psychiatry.
82
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I can tell people's troubles and character
by the way they blow up a toy balloon.
83
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And it's much cheaper than a couch.
Let me show you how it works.
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For instance,
the average and normal person
85
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would blow a balloon like that.
That's the average type.
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And then we have a straightforward person.
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Straightforward time.
88
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Some people are a little backwards.
Backwards, yes.
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The backward type.
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Did you see that? Ha, ha.
Oh, I've got talent.
91
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Here's a scatterbrain.
Their mind jumps around a bit.
92
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Their balloon would do the same thing.
93
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I think we'll get rid of that.
Now, to get the message,
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you have a person wrap up
all of these thoughts.
95
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Put them all together and you find out
something more about them.
96
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I've made quite a name for myself
doing this. And I don't like it.
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You've heard of pink elephants.
Here's someone who sees pink elephants.
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Looking a little like that.
A little pink elephant, right there.
99
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Oh, you're so right.
100
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Let's take his trunk here now
and make a little suitcase out of it.
101
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:11,955
I have an uncle used to see elephants
when he was inebriated. Drunk.
102
00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:14,708
He was a character. He was a kleptomaniac.
103
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A kleptomaniac, that's a person
who finds things before you lose them.
104
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But, um, he's reformed. He only
steals things now that begin with "A."
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A watch. A car. A purse.
A wallet. A rabbit.
106
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Here's a little rabbit up there now.
107
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Hey-- Hey, hey, hey!
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Did you hear about the rabbit, washed
his hare and couldn't do a thing with her.
109
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Perhaps you're right.
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This is just a normal husband
leading the life of a dog.
111
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But he's a gay, debonair
French poodle-type dog.
112
00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:44,696
And there's a little problem
there again now.
113
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I have a French poodle.
I had to sell my dog.
114
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He ran in front of a lawn mower,
and it cut off his tail.
115
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I sold him wholesale.
I couldn't re-tail him.
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Here's a nearsighted person. They...
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Whoa, there.
118
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We'll just wrap these up
and see what we have.
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I want you to remember
my name again, folks. Wally Boag.
120
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Because, you'll be reading about me
in the newspapers. Heh.
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I smoke in bed.
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Now, here's a, uh, very fancy dog.
This is a police dog.
123
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You might not recognize him.
He's in the CIA.
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Same dog, going around the corner.
125
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I'd like to make more,
but something happened.
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I had a whole lot of balloons in here--
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[BAND PLAYING COMICAL MUSIC]
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[ALL SHOUTING]
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I don't know.
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There, can you tell anything
about me from this?
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Yeah. You've got a round shape,
and you're full of hot air.
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Oh, great act, Wally.
I loved that last balloon.
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Oh, really? I thought I blew it.
134
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Hi, Miss Piggy.
135
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Oh, hello, Wallace.
136
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Oh! Ha, ha. Foo-Foo, Foo-Foo!
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00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,567
Come to mommykins, Foo-Foo.
138
00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:09,364
Kermie? Kermie? Are you going to give
Foo-Foo and me a wonderful introduction?
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Uh, right.
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[FOO-FOO BARKS]
141
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:16,037
Oh, oh, Rowlfy? Rowlfy?
Now, do you have your musical cues?
142
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Yes. I hate playing dog acts.
143
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Professional jealousy.
144
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On with the vaudeville show.
145
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Here's The Muppet Show's answer to Lassie:
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The amazing Foo-Foo and
her equally amazing trainer, Miss Piggy!
147
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[PLAYING DRAMATIC INTRO]
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Thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you.
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Ladies and gen--
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Cool it!
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[CLEARS THROAT]
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Ladies and gentlemen, now here she is,
Foo-Foo the wonder dog.
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Yes, yes. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
154
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Thank you. Very good, Foo-Foo.
155
00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:09,007
Now, for her second trick... Ahem.
156
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Second trick?
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For her second trick.
158
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Very good. Now, for her third trick.
159
00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:21,936
Yes.
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I am going to ask Foo-Foo
to solve a difficult mathematical problem.
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Foo-Foo? What is two plus two?
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00:09:31,863 --> 00:09:34,240
[BARKING]
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One more.
164
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She wasn't finished!
165
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Three is wrong.
166
00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:51,466
Well, I know that. But I figured that was
as close as she was gonna get.
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[LAUGHS MOCKINGLY]
168
00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:56,638
We shall do it again.
169
00:09:56,721 --> 00:09:59,265
-This time let her finish. Mmm.
-Mmm.
170
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Foo-Foo, dear. What is two plus two?
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[BARKING]
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Aha.
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[BARKS]
174
00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,031
No! What are you doing?
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I was waiting for her to finish.
176
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[WHINING]
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Oh, wonderful.
Now you've gotten her all upset.
178
00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:25,125
Oh, sorry.
Maybe that trick's too hard for her.
179
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:28,461
Have her do something simple,
like roll over and play dead.
180
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:33,049
Why don't you roll over and drop dead?
181
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,970
If I wanted her to do something simple,
182
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:41,141
I would have had her play the piano
and make dumb remarks.
183
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:43,643
Now. Ahem.
184
00:10:43,727 --> 00:10:47,731
Would everyone like
to see Foo-Foo dance? Hmm?
185
00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:51,818
It's unanimous!
186
00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:54,154
Just play the music.
187
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All right, dance Foo-Foo! Dance for mommy!
Dance!
188
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[CAT SCREECHES]
189
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Why'd you stop playing?
190
00:10:59,284 --> 00:11:00,452
I heard that.
191
00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:01,619
[GROWLING]
192
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,621
Foo-Foo, it's behind you!
193
00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,915
Aaah! Go get him!
194
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,877
Sorry, Miss Piggy.
Old habits are hard to break.
195
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,296
Get it, Foo-Foo!
I'll head him off over here!
196
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:13,381
Woof, woof! Woof, woof, woof!
197
00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:14,591
-Sit!
-Woof, woof, woof!
198
00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:18,094
Have we ever said this show
is going to the dogs?
199
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,847
About a million times.
200
00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,140
Woof, woof!
201
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,768
Okay, moving right along.
202
00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:29,022
Here are three gifted singers
who have all kissed the Blarney Stone.
203
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:32,942
Ladies and gentlemen,
The Leprechaun Brothers. Yay! And begorra!
204
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,155
[SINGING IN GIBBERISH]
205
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:58,468
♪ Oh, Danny boy
Oh, Danny boy ♪
206
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,929
♪ Oh, Danny ♪
207
00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:02,055
♪ Boy ♪
208
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:08,103
♪ Oh, Danny boy
Oh, boy, oh, boy ♪
209
00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:10,730
♪ Oh, Danny ♪
210
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:14,442
♪ Me, me, me, me ♪
211
00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:18,363
♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me, me ♪
212
00:12:18,446 --> 00:12:21,157
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
213
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:26,329
-♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me ♪
-♪ Yeah ♪
214
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:29,499
♪ Yeah ♪
215
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:33,378
♪ Me, me, me, me ♪
216
00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:38,508
♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me, me ♪
217
00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:45,390
♪ Oh, Danny boy
Oh, Danny boy ♪
218
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:48,685
♪ Oh, boy, oh, boy ♪
219
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:53,314
-♪ Me, me, me, me ♪
-♪ Oh, Danny ♪
220
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:54,899
[ALL SOBBING]
221
00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:59,362
♪ Oh, Danny boy
Oh, Danny ♪
222
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:01,948
♪ Oh, Danny boy ♪
223
00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:08,580
♪ Oh, Danny boy
Oh, Danny boy ♪
224
00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,707
♪ Oh, Danny boy ♪
225
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:16,421
Oh, Danny boy! Oh, Danny boy!
226
00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:22,594
Well, there goes another
popular expression down the drain.
227
00:13:22,677 --> 00:13:25,889
-What's that?
-The luck of the Irish.
228
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:31,603
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
continuing with our vaudeville show,
229
00:13:31,686 --> 00:13:36,691
it's Wally Boag time.
And here he is to do the Highland fling.
230
00:13:39,611 --> 00:13:42,530
Don't fling me like that!
231
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,410
Thank you, thank you. I deserved it.
232
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:48,995
I am Scotch, you know.
233
00:13:49,079 --> 00:13:55,293
It was my great-grandfather McBoag that
gave me these very rare McBag Bird, here.
234
00:13:55,377 --> 00:13:57,545
Isn't she pretty?
235
00:13:57,629 --> 00:13:59,339
Can't fly, but what a voice.
236
00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:03,635
Little history on the bag bird, it was
originated in Ireland in the 15th century,
237
00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:08,264
and the Irish gave them to the Scots. The
Scots haven't caught on to the joke yet.
238
00:14:08,348 --> 00:14:10,850
Yeah. For my first number, I play by ear.
239
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:13,103
I play-- I'm not well.
240
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,063
My first number.
241
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:16,439
Come on, baby.
242
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,649
[PLAYING OFF-KEY]
243
00:14:17,732 --> 00:14:19,651
Air raid!
244
00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,030
Come on, you old bag.
245
00:14:24,114 --> 00:14:27,367
It's been eating green olives, again.
There, there, now.
246
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:29,327
It's lonesome for its mommy. Yeah.
247
00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:31,663
Just relax.
248
00:14:31,746 --> 00:14:35,709
Oh, one more time. One more time.
249
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,628
Oh, well. I'll give it a vitamin pill.
That might help.
250
00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:40,505
Actually, I would like to play--
251
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:43,049
"I would like to play." I've got to.
252
00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:45,260
A little song entitled,
253
00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:49,055
"The Girl Next Door Lived the Life
of a Dog So I Called Her Rover."
254
00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:50,348
"I called!"
255
00:14:50,432 --> 00:14:51,850
Shouldn't have, should I?
256
00:14:51,933 --> 00:14:53,601
Here we go. Ahem.
257
00:14:55,020 --> 00:14:57,689
[PLAYING OFF-KEY]
258
00:15:16,207 --> 00:15:17,500
Of course, a lot of people--
259
00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:18,626
[BAGPIPE WHEEZING]
260
00:15:18,710 --> 00:15:20,378
A lot of people-- A lot--
261
00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:22,797
I'm talking, do you mind? Thank you.
262
00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:24,549
A lot of people-- Down, girl.
263
00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:26,801
A lot of people-- I'll be right with you.
264
00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:30,805
A lot of people have said,
"Wally," --that's my maiden name--
265
00:15:30,889 --> 00:15:33,975
"Is it possible to play a melody
on the bagpipes?"
266
00:15:34,059 --> 00:15:36,686
Is it possible to play a melody?
267
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:40,231
No. But I'd like to endeavor
to play "Swanee River."
268
00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:42,525
And I wondered if the band-- "Band!"
269
00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:45,528
--would join me,
because I'm really coming apart.
270
00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:49,616
You ready? "Swanee River." In rock time.
271
00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:51,951
[PLAYING "SWANEE RIVER"]
272
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:21,981
No hands.
273
00:16:33,118 --> 00:16:34,994
Wow, so beautiful, bird.
274
00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:39,332
-Whoo, how about we get together?
-Get away from her, you masher, you.
275
00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:41,251
-Okay! Great act, Wally!
-Stop that!
276
00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:43,211
Leave her alone! Now, come on! Hey!
277
00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:47,048
In case anybody wants me, Pops,
I'm getting some fresh air.
278
00:16:47,132 --> 00:16:50,719
Oh, great. You can watch the stage door
while I'm away.
279
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:52,387
Hey, where you going, Pops?
280
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:53,888
Going to watch the show.
281
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:56,891
Well, let me know how I was.
282
00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:00,854
Introducing the astounding illusionist,
283
00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:05,859
Dr. Salamander, hypnotist and newt. Yay!
284
00:17:07,902 --> 00:17:12,032
Aloha! Ciao! Hey! Salaam!
285
00:17:13,283 --> 00:17:16,745
First, I need a volunteer
from the audience.
286
00:17:16,828 --> 00:17:20,206
Sir, you with the mustache.
Yes, in the front row.
287
00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,792
-[SNORING]
-Uh, somebody help him up.
288
00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:28,089
Huh? Hey!
Get your dirty hands off my filthy arm!
289
00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:32,385
Ah, that's good sir.
Just step right over here.
290
00:17:32,469 --> 00:17:35,347
Wait a minute, Pops.
What are you doing in the audience?
291
00:17:35,430 --> 00:17:39,225
I come here to try to get some sleep.
292
00:17:39,309 --> 00:17:43,605
Well, this is no time for that.
Because I am going to--
293
00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:46,191
-Hey, wake up!
-Wha--?
294
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:49,652
I'm gonna hypnotize you,
and then I will command you
295
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:54,949
to float up into the air,
levitating against all laws of gravity.
296
00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:57,535
-Wake up!
-Oh, what is it now?
297
00:17:57,619 --> 00:17:58,661
[SIGHS]
298
00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,663
Now I'm gonna put you to sleep.
299
00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:02,791
You woke me up to tell me that?
300
00:18:04,042 --> 00:18:07,087
All right. Lookit, just lie down here.
301
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:10,048
That's the first sensible thing
you've said all evening.
302
00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:14,177
All right, look into my eyes,
and by the time I count to ten,
303
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:17,722
you will be totally under my power.
304
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:19,432
-One.
-[SNORING]
305
00:18:19,516 --> 00:18:21,309
Good enough!
306
00:18:21,393 --> 00:18:25,438
All right. And now, up you go.
307
00:18:25,522 --> 00:18:30,276
Levitate. Rise, rise!
308
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:31,986
Up you go.
309
00:18:32,070 --> 00:18:38,034
Rise. Up! Up, you go! Yes.
310
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:41,121
Thank you, thank you.
311
00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:45,500
All right, wake up. You can come down now.
312
00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:48,003
No, watch out! Look out for the lights!
313
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:49,546
[GLASS BREAKS]
314
00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:53,258
Oh, this is terrible! Wake up!
315
00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:56,011
Salamander, what do we do now?
316
00:18:56,094 --> 00:18:59,431
Never levitate the hard of hearing.
317
00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:01,307
He's headed towards the backstage!
318
00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:03,059
Scooter, do something!
319
00:19:03,143 --> 00:19:05,228
I'll slam the stage door, boss!
320
00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:07,897
It's the one thing
that always wakes Pops up.
321
00:19:09,733 --> 00:19:11,276
-Oh, hi, Wally.
-Hi, Scooter.
322
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:14,070
-Am I on yet?
-No, we're waiting for this act to end.
323
00:19:14,154 --> 00:19:15,572
Good.
324
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,574
[POPS YELLS]
325
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:25,498
Now, that looks like the end of an act.
326
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:34,466
Ladies and gentlemen, Wally Boag
and his world-famous Western sketch. Yay!
327
00:19:38,136 --> 00:19:40,805
I want you to meet the roughest, toughest,
328
00:19:40,889 --> 00:19:44,893
rootin'-tootin'est cowboy
in the whole Wild West:
329
00:19:44,976 --> 00:19:47,979
Pecos Bill.
330
00:19:48,063 --> 00:19:51,232
♪ Pecos Bill was quite a cowboy
Down in Texas ♪
331
00:19:51,316 --> 00:19:54,694
♪ He was the Western Superman
To say the least ♪
332
00:19:54,778 --> 00:19:58,448
♪ He was the roughest, toughest critter
Never known to be a quitter ♪
333
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:02,535
♪ 'Cause he never had no fear
Of man nor beast ♪
334
00:20:02,619 --> 00:20:04,662
[MATADOR MUSIC PLAYING]
335
00:20:10,669 --> 00:20:13,630
Don't you worry about a thing,
Miss Annie Sue.
336
00:20:13,713 --> 00:20:16,007
I got the fastest draw in the West.
337
00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:17,634
-You wanna see it?
-Yeah!
338
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:18,760
[GUN FIRES]
339
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,553
You wanna see it again?
340
00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:24,474
♪ Once there was a drought
That spread all over Texas ♪
341
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:27,894
♪ So to sunny California he did go ♪
342
00:20:27,977 --> 00:20:31,481
♪ And though the gag is kinda corny
He brought rain from Californey ♪
343
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:34,109
♪ That's the way we got
The Gulf of Mexico ♪
344
00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:35,235
♪ Sing that song ♪
345
00:20:35,318 --> 00:20:38,571
♪ Yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
346
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:41,991
♪ For the toughest critter
West of the Alamo ♪
347
00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:45,370
♪ Once a band of rustlers
Stole a herd of cattle ♪
348
00:20:45,453 --> 00:20:48,957
♪ But they didn't know
The herd they stole was Bill's ♪
349
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:53,253
♪ When he caught them crooked villains
He knocked out all their fillins ♪
350
00:20:53,336 --> 00:20:55,797
♪ That is why there's gold
In them there hills ♪
351
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:59,551
♪ So yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
352
00:20:59,634 --> 00:21:03,722
♪ For the toughest critter
West of the Alamo ♪
353
00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,807
[SPITTOON CLANGING MUSICALLY]
354
00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:47,599
♪ Pecos lost his way
While traveling 'cross the desert ♪
355
00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:51,061
♪ It was 90 miles
Across the burning sand ♪
356
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:54,773
♪ He knew he'd never reach the border
If he didn't get some water ♪
357
00:21:54,856 --> 00:21:57,317
♪ So he got a stick
And dug the Rio Grande ♪
358
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:58,401
♪ Water! ♪
359
00:21:58,485 --> 00:22:02,072
♪ Yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
360
00:22:02,155 --> 00:22:05,283
♪ For the toughest critter
West of the Alamo ♪
361
00:22:05,367 --> 00:22:08,703
♪ While a tribe of painted redskins
Did a war dance ♪
362
00:22:08,787 --> 00:22:11,831
♪ Pecos started shooting up
Their little game ♪
363
00:22:11,915 --> 00:22:15,835
♪ He gave those redskins such a shake-up
That they jumped out of their makeup ♪
364
00:22:15,919 --> 00:22:18,672
♪ That's the way
The Painted Desert got its name ♪
365
00:22:18,755 --> 00:22:22,425
♪ Hey, yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
366
00:22:22,509 --> 00:22:25,970
♪ For the toughest critter
West of the Alamo ♪
367
00:22:26,054 --> 00:22:28,556
♪ Once he roped a raging cyclone
Out of nowhere ♪
368
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:29,683
♪ Nowhere! ♪
369
00:22:29,766 --> 00:22:32,143
♪ And he straddled it
And settled down with ease ♪
370
00:22:32,227 --> 00:22:33,269
♪ With ease! ♪
371
00:22:33,353 --> 00:22:36,856
♪ While the cyclone bucked and flitted
Pecos rolled a smoke and lit it ♪
372
00:22:36,940 --> 00:22:40,026
♪ And he tamed that ornery wind
Down to a breeze ♪
373
00:22:40,110 --> 00:22:43,780
♪ So yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
374
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:47,200
♪ For the toughest critter
West of the Alamo ♪
375
00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:50,870
♪ So yippee-i-ay-i-ya, yippee-i-o ♪
376
00:22:50,954 --> 00:22:53,498
-♪ For the toughest critter west ♪
-♪ West! ♪
377
00:22:53,581 --> 00:23:00,130
♪ Of the Alamo ♪
378
00:23:00,213 --> 00:23:01,506
[GUNS FIRING]
379
00:23:12,142 --> 00:23:14,060
Okay, it looks like it's about time
380
00:23:14,144 --> 00:23:16,980
to head back to the old corral here
on The Muppet Show.
381
00:23:17,063 --> 00:23:20,442
But before we go,
let us bring back our terrific guest.
382
00:23:20,525 --> 00:23:25,572
Ladies and gentlemen, Wally Boag! Yeah!
383
00:23:27,574 --> 00:23:30,577
That was wonderful, Wally.
But I'm sorry about your teeth.
384
00:23:30,660 --> 00:23:33,163
-Just send us your dentist bill.
-No problem.
385
00:23:33,246 --> 00:23:35,331
I grow them back real fast, Kermit.
386
00:23:36,958 --> 00:23:38,335
Wally, how do you do that?
387
00:23:38,418 --> 00:23:41,546
Oh, watch this.
388
00:23:42,797 --> 00:23:45,258
We'll see you next time
on The Muppet Show!
389
00:23:45,342 --> 00:23:46,384
[CHATTERING]
390
00:23:46,468 --> 00:23:48,553
[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
391
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:26,383
You know that Wally Boag
is a multi-millionaire.
392
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:28,009
Oh? Where'd he get his money?
393
00:24:28,093 --> 00:24:30,136
The tooth fairy!
30593
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