All language subtitles for The Nanny S02E10 When You Pish Upon a Star 1080p WEB-DL DD2 0 H 264-squalor_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:04,400 [PHONE BEEPS] Maxwell, we can get this kid. 2 00:00:04,433 --> 00:00:07,116 His parents said yes, his agent said yes. 3 00:00:07,150 --> 00:00:08,483 Now, shall I call L.A. and close the deal or not? 4 00:00:09,160 --> 00:00:11,660 I don't know, C.C. 5 00:00:11,100 --> 00:00:13,350 A sitcom star in a revival ofOliver! 6 00:00:13,383 --> 00:00:14,450 What are we gonna to call it, 7 00:00:14,483 --> 00:00:15,250 Eight Orphans is Enough? 8 00:00:18,416 --> 00:00:22,660 Maxwell, this kid is on every lunchbox in America. 9 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:24,300 This is little Kippy fromRoyal Flush. 10 00:00:24,333 --> 00:00:25,330 Never heard of it. Niles? 11 00:00:26,216 --> 00:00:28,830 Oh, I'm not much for sitcoms, sir. 12 00:00:28,116 --> 00:00:29,450 Well,Mr. Belvedere, Benson... 13 00:00:32,266 --> 00:00:34,660 Anything, really, where the butler is 14 00:00:34,100 --> 00:00:34,483 the smartest member of the family. 15 00:00:37,300 --> 00:00:38,483 Maxwell, I am telling you 16 00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:41,250 "Jack Walker" spells box office. 17 00:00:41,283 --> 00:00:43,830 He will appeal to even the least-cultured, 18 00:00:43,116 --> 00:00:45,333 lowest common denominator. 19 00:00:45,366 --> 00:00:50,330 Oh, you have got to try these pepperoni Hot Pockets. 20 00:00:50,660 --> 00:00:51,183 You will never order from Pizza Hut again. 21 00:00:51,216 --> 00:00:52,660 Mmm. 22 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:54,200 Wha--? 23 00:00:54,233 --> 00:00:56,166 Uh, Miss Fine, 24 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,266 have you by any chance heard of a young actor named Jack-- 25 00:00:58,300 --> 00:01:00,500 Walker, from Royal Flush? 26 00:01:00,830 --> 00:01:02,416 Oh, the kid is a genius! 27 00:01:02,450 --> 00:01:04,150 When he goes, 28 00:01:04,183 --> 00:01:05,316 "Hey! Yo! Whoa!" - [C.C MOUTHING WORDS] 29 00:01:05,350 --> 00:01:06,183 Oh! 30 00:01:08,266 --> 00:01:10,500 See, Maxwell, if we've got Jack, 31 00:01:10,830 --> 00:01:11,150 we've got a success. 32 00:01:11,183 --> 00:01:13,233 I will bet my reputation on it. 33 00:01:13,266 --> 00:01:15,330 Oh, sorry, there's a $5 minimum. 34 00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:18,283 [YELPS] 35 00:01:21,330 --> 00:01:23,000 Look. He's walked off his show. 36 00:01:23,330 --> 00:01:24,333 He wants to do quality, and he thinks that's what we do. 37 00:01:24,366 --> 00:01:25,116 [CHUCKLES] 38 00:01:27,183 --> 00:01:29,366 All right, I'll think about making him an offer. 39 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:31,116 Yeah, well, don't give it as much thought as you did 40 00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:32,100 when you turned downCats. 41 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:35,366 What is the bloody statute of limitations 42 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:37,316 on that mistake, Miss Fine? 43 00:01:37,350 --> 00:01:40,160 I would say "now and forever". 44 00:01:42,266 --> 00:01:45,000 Have you ever even seen Royal Flush? 45 00:01:45,330 --> 00:01:46,366 Oh, God, now she's sitting on the desk. 46 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:47,166 This is gonna be an hour, at least. 47 00:01:48,166 --> 00:01:49,466 I'll be brief. 48 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:52,466 See, it's all about this rich, handsome widower 49 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:55,000 who hires this really streetwise maid to take care of his kids... 50 00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:58,183 only she's really gorgeous, 51 00:01:58,216 --> 00:02:00,330 so there's this major sexual tension. 52 00:02:01,216 --> 00:02:03,200 Oh, please! FRAN: What? 53 00:02:03,233 --> 00:02:04,383 He's in love with his business partner. 54 00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:06,283 She's got all the class. 55 00:02:06,316 --> 00:02:08,400 Oh, what show are you watching? 56 00:02:08,433 --> 00:02:10,133 The butler shuts her up every time she opens her mouth. 57 00:02:12,660 --> 00:02:15,166 There's a butler? 58 00:02:15,166 --> 00:02:16,450 All right. Make the bloody deal. 59 00:02:16,483 --> 00:02:19,166 Anything to put an end to this insipid discussion. 60 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:21,283 Oh, this is exciting. 61 00:02:21,316 --> 00:02:24,330 So you'll put him up at a really nice hotel, 62 00:02:24,660 --> 00:02:25,450 give him the red-carpet treatment 63 00:02:25,483 --> 00:02:28,416 you know, room service, limos, theater tickets. 64 00:02:28,450 --> 00:02:30,450 Oh, and, you know, just so that he shouldn't feel alone, 65 00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:32,200 I'll go with him and take care of him. 66 00:02:34,660 --> 00:02:35,466 M-Maxwell, Nanny Fine is not qualified 67 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:37,000 to take care of him. 68 00:02:37,330 --> 00:02:39,500 He's a very important child. 69 00:02:39,830 --> 00:02:40,000 Unlike my own children? 70 00:02:41,660 --> 00:02:45,300 Whoopsie. 71 00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:47,216 I'm picturing the Plaza, 72 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,166 which is right down the road from Elizabeth Arden, 73 00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:50,133 in case he needs a bikini wax. 74 00:02:53,233 --> 00:02:56,160 He'll stay here with us until his parents can join him. 75 00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:57,400 Oh. Right. 76 00:02:57,433 --> 00:02:59,830 Well, whatever's best for the boy. 77 00:03:00,333 --> 00:03:01,183 [WHISPERS] This close. 78 00:03:03,366 --> 00:03:06,316 [THEME TUNE PLAYS] 79 00:03:06,350 --> 00:03:07,400 ♪ She was working In a bridal shop ♪ 80 00:03:07,433 --> 00:03:09,150 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 81 00:03:09,183 --> 00:03:10,233 ♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪ 82 00:03:10,266 --> 00:03:12,183 ♪ In one Of those crushing scenes ♪ 83 00:03:12,216 --> 00:03:14,000 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 84 00:03:14,330 --> 00:03:16,116 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 85 00:03:17,316 --> 00:03:18,350 ♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪ 86 00:03:18,383 --> 00:03:19,450 ♪ To the Sheffields' door ♪ 87 00:03:19,483 --> 00:03:21,250 ♪ She was there to sell makeup ♪ 88 00:03:21,283 --> 00:03:22,416 ♪ But the father saw more ♪ 89 00:03:22,450 --> 00:03:24,383 ♪ She had style, she had flair, she was there ♪ 90 00:03:24,416 --> 00:03:27,200 ♪ That's how she became The Nanny ♪ 91 00:03:28,483 --> 00:03:31,400 ♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪ 92 00:03:31,433 --> 00:03:33,466 ♪ Was just exactly What the doctor prescribed? ♪ 93 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:34,450 ♪ Now the father Finds her beguiling ♪ 94 00:03:34,483 --> 00:03:36,216 ♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪ 95 00:03:36,250 --> 00:03:37,283 ♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪ 96 00:03:37,316 --> 00:03:39,000 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 97 00:03:39,330 --> 00:03:40,233 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 98 00:03:40,266 --> 00:03:44,450 ♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪ 99 00:03:44,483 --> 00:03:46,100 ♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪ 100 00:03:46,133 --> 00:03:47,116 ♪ The nanny named Fran ♪ 101 00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:54,660 Come on, kids,Royal Flush is goin' on. 102 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:56,166 [TV PLAYS] I likeFull House 103 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,183 No way,Royal Flush Full House 104 00:04:00,500 --> 00:04:01,316 Oh, look, there he is. 105 00:04:01,350 --> 00:04:04,660 Hey! Yo! Whoa! 106 00:04:04,100 --> 00:04:05,466 Ah! It's a gift from God. 107 00:04:07,383 --> 00:04:08,233 Like Streisand. 108 00:04:10,660 --> 00:04:12,150 No, he is so obnoxious. 109 00:04:12,183 --> 00:04:14,216 It's TV, Mags. It's a formula. 110 00:04:14,250 --> 00:04:16,283 Look, the big sister's an airhead, 111 00:04:16,316 --> 00:04:18,150 and the little kid is obnoxious. 112 00:04:18,183 --> 00:04:19,500 But then he develops into a teen heartthrob. 113 00:04:22,416 --> 00:04:24,433 Yeah, but he better keep his ego in check. 114 00:04:24,466 --> 00:04:26,150 Otherwise, he's gonna be knockin' over video stores 115 00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:27,500 with Dana Plato. 116 00:04:31,300 --> 00:04:33,266 What happens to the cute little one? 117 00:04:33,300 --> 00:04:35,166 She gets a breast reduction and goes to Yale. 118 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:40,160 Please, would you turn that off? 119 00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:42,350 Jack will be here any minute. 120 00:04:42,350 --> 00:04:44,100 Oh, God, look at him. 121 00:04:44,133 --> 00:04:45,316 He...he can't act. 122 00:04:45,350 --> 00:04:48,830 Shh! Here comes the maid. 123 00:04:48,116 --> 00:04:50,433 Don't start with me, Clive. 124 00:04:50,466 --> 00:04:51,233 [LAUGHS] 125 00:04:55,100 --> 00:04:57,116 [LAUGHS] 126 00:04:57,150 --> 00:05:00,100 Oh, just look at the clothes she's wearing. 127 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,316 How could she afford to dress like that on her salary? 128 00:05:03,316 --> 00:05:04,283 I know I can't. 129 00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:08,500 This is absurd. 130 00:05:08,830 --> 00:05:11,250 The father just stands there like a stunned beast 131 00:05:11,283 --> 00:05:12,400 and gives his bloody servants the run of the house. 132 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:18,366 The servants don't have the run of the house. 133 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,660 Oh, by the way, my mother's comin' over 134 00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:20,483 to use your jacuzzi tub. 135 00:05:23,350 --> 00:05:24,433 Tell her level 3 bubbles and pulsates. 136 00:05:26,100 --> 00:05:26,416 So I've heard. 137 00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:31,660 [DOORBELL RINGS] Okay. 138 00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:33,100 Kids, shut the TV off. 139 00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,133 The last thing Jack Walker wants to hear 140 00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:36,500 is lines from his own show. 141 00:05:38,660 --> 00:05:41,383 Hey! Yo! Whoa! 142 00:05:41,416 --> 00:05:42,433 Like, I haven't heard that in about two seconds. 143 00:05:44,216 --> 00:05:46,100 Jack, how was the flight? 144 00:05:46,133 --> 00:05:47,416 I hate airplane food. It's loaded with salt. 145 00:05:47,450 --> 00:05:49,000 Look at me, I'm all bloated. 146 00:05:49,330 --> 00:05:49,466 I look nine. 147 00:05:52,150 --> 00:05:54,830 Jack, I'm Maxwell Sheffield. 148 00:05:54,116 --> 00:05:56,216 Yeah, yeah. How you doin'? Love that tie, babe. 149 00:05:56,250 --> 00:05:57,450 Who's this? [GIGGLES] 150 00:05:57,483 --> 00:05:59,300 Oh, I'm Fran. 151 00:05:59,333 --> 00:06:00,483 And I'm such a big fan. 152 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,116 I've seen every one of your episodes. 153 00:06:03,150 --> 00:06:05,150 Except for the one that the president interrupted, 154 00:06:05,183 --> 00:06:07,100 like he couldn't invade Haiti duringBlossom? 155 00:06:08,216 --> 00:06:08,483 [BOTH LAUGH] 156 00:06:10,100 --> 00:06:11,316 [HE CHUCKLES] 157 00:06:11,350 --> 00:06:13,133 Babbling, Miss Fine. 158 00:06:13,166 --> 00:06:15,150 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm just so excited. 159 00:06:15,183 --> 00:06:17,830 I can't believe I'm meeting little Kippy Cooper. 160 00:06:17,116 --> 00:06:18,216 Please pinch me. 161 00:06:18,250 --> 00:06:19,660 Oh! 162 00:06:22,416 --> 00:06:25,416 [SINGSONGY] That's just an expression! 163 00:06:25,450 --> 00:06:28,216 Jack, come on, let me introduce you to my children. 164 00:06:28,250 --> 00:06:30,383 This is Brighton, Grace and Maggie. 165 00:06:30,416 --> 00:06:33,200 Hey, I really dug that episode where you lost your virginity. 166 00:06:33,233 --> 00:06:34,366 Yeah, like I had to act. [LAUGHS] 167 00:06:37,183 --> 00:06:39,300 Brighton, since you'll be sharing a room, 168 00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:41,116 why don't you go up and put away your toys, hm? 169 00:06:41,150 --> 00:06:41,483 Toys? 170 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:45,450 Toys?! 171 00:06:45,483 --> 00:06:47,383 Why don't you just bring out the home movies 172 00:06:47,416 --> 00:06:49,830 of me going pee-pee in a cowboy hat and holster? 173 00:06:53,100 --> 00:06:54,250 Do you know the Olsen twins? 174 00:06:54,283 --> 00:06:56,416 Intimately. 175 00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:59,366 The three of us went to Palm Springs, we were in a hot tub-- 176 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,330 Ah, Gracie, it's your bedtime. 177 00:07:01,660 --> 00:07:03,166 Bedtime. 178 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,250 Uh, when's my bedtime? Wanna tuck me in? 179 00:07:06,283 --> 00:07:08,266 You know, you must be a very good actor, 180 00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:09,483 because on the show you're so endearing. 181 00:07:12,150 --> 00:07:13,316 I don't know why you hired him. 182 00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:15,450 [SCOFFS] 183 00:07:15,483 --> 00:07:18,116 Well, well, well. [CHUCKLES] 184 00:07:18,150 --> 00:07:19,450 Guess it just leaves me and you. 185 00:07:19,483 --> 00:07:21,116 [SHE CHUCKLES] 186 00:07:21,150 --> 00:07:22,300 Not unless that head screws off, 187 00:07:22,333 --> 00:07:23,183 and you can put on Jason Priestley's. 188 00:07:25,283 --> 00:07:27,250 [UNDER BREATH] All right! 189 00:07:27,283 --> 00:07:29,830 Look how she just cuts him off at the knees. 190 00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:30,400 From a lump of clay. 191 00:07:34,316 --> 00:07:36,150 [CLEARS THROAT] If you'll excuse me, Jack, 192 00:07:36,183 --> 00:07:37,266 I promised your parents I'd telephone 193 00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:39,150 that you arrived safely. 194 00:07:39,183 --> 00:07:41,300 How you leave is another matter. 195 00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:43,133 May I take your bags, sir? 196 00:07:43,166 --> 00:07:45,133 Oh, thank you very much, my good man. 197 00:07:45,166 --> 00:07:46,383 Here's, um, a hundred. 198 00:07:46,416 --> 00:07:47,250 Uh, what'll I call you? 199 00:07:49,330 --> 00:07:49,433 Oh, just whistle. 200 00:07:56,316 --> 00:07:57,450 All right, come on, Damien-- 201 00:07:57,483 --> 00:07:58,483 I-I mean, Jack. 202 00:08:01,116 --> 00:08:02,166 I'll show you around. 203 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:04,160 Yeah, I've been around, 204 00:08:04,500 --> 00:08:05,830 but I'll watch you walk. 205 00:08:05,116 --> 00:08:06,350 Oh! 206 00:08:06,383 --> 00:08:07,366 Sorry, just a reflex. [CHUCKLES] 207 00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:08,233 Yeah, so is this. 208 00:08:18,366 --> 00:08:21,116 How's your pudding, Miss Babcock? 209 00:08:21,150 --> 00:08:22,160 It's delicious. Why? 210 00:08:23,350 --> 00:08:25,150 Just as I thought. 211 00:08:25,183 --> 00:08:26,200 These expiration dates are meaningless. 212 00:08:33,266 --> 00:08:37,250 How do you become a full-fledged moron by 12? 213 00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:38,216 Who you talking about? 214 00:08:38,250 --> 00:08:40,500 Oh, that Walker kid. 215 00:08:40,830 --> 00:08:41,183 The eighth dwarf, Horny. 216 00:08:44,166 --> 00:08:46,166 Ilove 217 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:47,250 I mean, Jack Daniels-- 218 00:08:47,283 --> 00:08:48,183 I mean, Jack Walker. 219 00:08:51,233 --> 00:08:53,216 Ever since Rob Roy and Tom Collins left her, 220 00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:54,116 they've all been a blur. 221 00:08:57,233 --> 00:09:02,133 I think he is the most obnoxious, sexist brat. 222 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:05,216 He thinks that he can come here and look me up and down 223 00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:07,250 and pinch me just 'cause he makes millions. 224 00:09:07,283 --> 00:09:09,330 Well, he's got a good ten years 225 00:09:09,660 --> 00:09:12,830 before he can get away with that. 226 00:09:12,830 --> 00:09:14,400 Who cares? Your job is to make him happy. 227 00:09:14,433 --> 00:09:16,400 Not at the expense of my kids. 228 00:09:16,433 --> 00:09:18,316 And I'll tell you, that Jack Walker 229 00:09:18,350 --> 00:09:20,133 is making everyone miserable. 230 00:09:20,166 --> 00:09:21,333 God bless Jack Walker. 231 00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:25,100 This wasthe of my life. 232 00:09:25,133 --> 00:09:26,300 Good call, Nanny Fine. 233 00:09:26,333 --> 00:09:29,250 [CACKLES] 234 00:09:29,283 --> 00:09:30,316 Fran, you should've seen it. 235 00:09:30,350 --> 00:09:32,116 People were hangin' all over me. 236 00:09:32,150 --> 00:09:34,233 I have finally found my calling in life - 237 00:09:34,266 --> 00:09:35,100 sucking up to a famous guy. 238 00:09:38,660 --> 00:09:41,316 Oh, honey, you're underestimating yourself. 239 00:09:41,350 --> 00:09:44,483 You don't need Jack Walker to be popular. 240 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,830 You got a trust fund that could choke a horse. 241 00:09:48,366 --> 00:09:50,500 Do you think it would be okay if I grabbed a bite 242 00:09:50,830 --> 00:09:51,250 with Jack and some girls from school? 243 00:09:51,283 --> 00:09:55,660 Oh, your first dinner date. 244 00:09:55,100 --> 00:09:57,160 I remember when I was your age. 245 00:09:57,500 --> 00:10:00,160 No, I don't. 246 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,330 Oh, yeah, yeah. I do, I do. 247 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,316 You know, Alby Malcolm and I went out for burritos. 248 00:10:05,350 --> 00:10:06,416 Don't do that. 249 00:10:11,216 --> 00:10:13,383 [ALL CHUCKLE] 250 00:10:13,416 --> 00:10:15,300 Hi, Brighton. Hi, Brighton. 251 00:10:15,333 --> 00:10:18,316 Hi, girls. I'm Fran, the nanny. [CHUCKLES] 252 00:10:18,350 --> 00:10:19,333 Cute bustier. 253 00:10:21,466 --> 00:10:23,350 Won't you excuse us? 254 00:10:23,383 --> 00:10:27,183 No-ho-ho-ho-ho. 255 00:10:27,216 --> 00:10:29,000 Oh, but, Fran! 256 00:10:29,330 --> 00:10:30,350 Just what did you think you were going to do 257 00:10:30,383 --> 00:10:32,433 with an 18-year-old girl? 258 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,366 I was hoping to feel my way through the situation. 259 00:10:37,283 --> 00:10:39,316 All right, I'll go to my room. 260 00:10:39,350 --> 00:10:42,330 Heidi, go to his room. 261 00:10:42,660 --> 00:10:43,300 Heidi, if you ever want to see the Alps again, 262 00:10:43,333 --> 00:10:44,116 hit the road. 263 00:10:45,233 --> 00:10:47,160 You too, honey. 264 00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:48,383 [YODELS] ♪ Yodel-ay-hee-hoo ♪ 265 00:10:48,416 --> 00:10:51,450 We're gonna have to lay down some ground rules here. 266 00:10:51,483 --> 00:10:53,366 Oh, yeah? Who says I gotta listen to you? 267 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:56,660 Listen, Mister Pister, 268 00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:58,500 when you've got a house of your own, 269 00:10:58,830 --> 00:10:59,350 you can do whatever you want. 270 00:10:59,383 --> 00:11:01,100 But as long as you're undermy 271 00:11:01,133 --> 00:11:02,660 Ma, stop throwin' your voice. 272 00:11:05,100 --> 00:11:06,450 If you don't lay off me, I'm gonna call my agent, 273 00:11:06,483 --> 00:11:08,333 I'm gonna get you fired. 274 00:11:08,366 --> 00:11:10,283 Good. What do you think? 275 00:11:10,316 --> 00:11:13,500 I'm scared of a little bald man with a cigar? 276 00:11:13,830 --> 00:11:15,383 Oh, yeah? My agent happens to be 34, 277 00:11:15,416 --> 00:11:17,183 6'2", with a mansion in Beverly Hills 278 00:11:17,216 --> 00:11:19,830 and a Porsche. 279 00:11:19,116 --> 00:11:21,383 Oh, well, go ahead and call him. 280 00:11:21,416 --> 00:11:23,133 Better yet, I'll call him. 281 00:11:23,166 --> 00:11:26,330 Give me his number. 282 00:11:26,660 --> 00:11:27,333 And a little privacy, 'cause this is right up my alley. 283 00:11:29,450 --> 00:11:33,830 I'm not happy. 284 00:11:33,116 --> 00:11:35,000 You know, you think that you're such a big shot 285 00:11:35,330 --> 00:11:36,266 just because you're in show business. 286 00:11:36,300 --> 00:11:38,216 Why don't you act like a normal kid? 287 00:11:38,250 --> 00:11:40,150 You should be out riding your bicycle, 288 00:11:40,183 --> 00:11:42,330 torturing your sister, buying fake doody. 289 00:11:44,330 --> 00:11:46,250 Don't you even have any friends? 290 00:11:46,283 --> 00:11:48,266 Sure, I do. My agent, my manager, my publicist. 291 00:11:50,330 --> 00:11:51,330 Yes, little buddy! 292 00:11:53,166 --> 00:11:54,160 Ah... 293 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:56,450 Right on time. 294 00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:58,300 Here. Just for being you. 295 00:11:58,333 --> 00:11:59,416 Love to love ya, baby. 296 00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,433 Name me one person that doesn't make a buck off of you. 297 00:12:07,466 --> 00:12:09,300 Besides your parents. 298 00:12:09,333 --> 00:12:10,216 Well, actually, we're in litigation. 299 00:12:12,483 --> 00:12:15,160 You're suing your own parents? 300 00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:16,183 How can you do that? 301 00:12:16,216 --> 00:12:18,330 They're ripping me off. 302 00:12:18,660 --> 00:12:20,100 No, I mean how can you do that, 'cause my folks-- 303 00:12:20,133 --> 00:12:20,366 Ah, they don't have any money. 304 00:12:24,283 --> 00:12:26,500 You know, Niles, I've had it up to here with that kid. 305 00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:27,266 Either he goes, or I do. 306 00:12:27,300 --> 00:12:28,433 Well, let's see. 307 00:12:28,466 --> 00:12:29,450 For bringing him a glass of milk, 308 00:12:29,483 --> 00:12:32,160 he gave me $100. 309 00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:33,333 For my birthday, you gave me a comb. 310 00:12:37,433 --> 00:12:39,116 [KNOCKS ON DOOR] 311 00:12:39,150 --> 00:12:41,100 Mr. Sheffield, I have to talk to you. 312 00:12:41,133 --> 00:12:42,233 Oh, no, Miss Fine. 313 00:12:42,266 --> 00:12:44,283 I want to talk to you. 314 00:12:44,316 --> 00:12:47,366 Oh, if it's about the clogged Jacuzzi, I'm sorry, 315 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,160 but once my mother starts scrubbing with a loofa, 316 00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:51,183 it's like makin' snow in Lillehammer. 317 00:12:54,366 --> 00:12:57,383 No, Miss Fine, I want to thank you... 318 00:12:57,416 --> 00:13:00,160 for convincing me to hire Jack. 319 00:13:00,500 --> 00:13:03,383 Maxwell! That was my idea. 320 00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:06,150 What do I have to do to please anyone around this house? 321 00:13:06,183 --> 00:13:07,166 Niles... 322 00:13:11,266 --> 00:13:13,300 But, sir, fish gotta swim. 323 00:13:16,233 --> 00:13:18,160 Control yourself, man. 324 00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:19,316 Oh, very well, sir. 325 00:13:19,350 --> 00:13:21,160 [CACKLES] 326 00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:25,150 Lemon? [SQUIRTS] 327 00:13:25,150 --> 00:13:27,150 Look, Miss Fine, 328 00:13:27,183 --> 00:13:29,830 his marquee value alone has the investors 329 00:13:29,116 --> 00:13:30,333 throwing money at me. 330 00:13:30,366 --> 00:13:32,183 You wonderful woman, you. 331 00:13:32,216 --> 00:13:34,116 Oh, I could just kiss you. 332 00:13:34,150 --> 00:13:35,660 Mmm-mwah! 333 00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:40,133 [GASPS] Well... 334 00:13:40,166 --> 00:13:41,333 How long's the kid gonna be here, a week? 335 00:13:43,483 --> 00:13:44,483 [KNOCKING AT DOOR] JACK: Mr. Sheffield? 336 00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:46,383 Oh, let me get that for you, sir. 337 00:13:49,116 --> 00:13:50,200 Thanks, old man. Pleasure. 338 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,366 Here's my little Oliver. 339 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:58,416 Ha-ha! 340 00:13:58,450 --> 00:13:59,366 [IMITATING OLIVER TWIST] Please, sir, 341 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:02,116 I want some more. [CHUCKLES] 342 00:14:02,150 --> 00:14:04,466 Uh, no, I haven't memorized all my lines yet. 343 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,333 Well, it's the first one. We're opening soon. 344 00:14:06,366 --> 00:14:09,330 Hoo-hoo, tick-tock. 345 00:14:09,660 --> 00:14:11,366 Uh, yeah. That's what I wanna talk to you about. 346 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:13,330 I'm quitting show business. 347 00:14:13,660 --> 00:14:15,160 You're quitting what? 348 00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:17,383 I just wanna be a normal kid, and I want out. 349 00:14:17,416 --> 00:14:19,483 And out you shall be just as soon asOliver! 350 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:21,366 finishes its three-year run. 351 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:22,116 [IMITATES ROCKET] 352 00:14:24,116 --> 00:14:25,233 No. Now. 353 00:14:26,433 --> 00:14:27,183 I'm sorry. 354 00:14:30,450 --> 00:14:31,466 [DOOR SLAMS] 355 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:35,660 [SOBS] No! 356 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:37,330 How can this happen? 357 00:14:37,660 --> 00:14:39,133 Oh, I don't know. 358 00:14:39,166 --> 00:14:41,133 Probably some wacko puttin' ideas into his head. 359 00:14:43,450 --> 00:14:44,233 [THUMP] 360 00:14:46,350 --> 00:14:49,330 Fran, I just wanted to thank you. 361 00:14:49,660 --> 00:14:50,166 Oh, honey, there's no reason to thank-- 362 00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,216 No, no, I wanted to thank you-- 363 00:14:51,250 --> 00:14:53,316 Please! I just made you a sandwich. 364 00:14:53,350 --> 00:14:56,350 If it wasn't for your-- - Honey, you're embarrassing me. 365 00:14:56,383 --> 00:14:58,450 If it wasn't for your advice, I would have spent 366 00:14:58,483 --> 00:15:00,166 the rest of my life as an actor making other people rich. 367 00:15:03,366 --> 00:15:05,133 [SNIFFS] 368 00:15:05,166 --> 00:15:06,116 Do you smell gas? 369 00:15:08,100 --> 00:15:08,333 [DOOR SLAMS] 370 00:15:15,250 --> 00:15:18,233 Nanny Fine, you're alone in a room with the kid 371 00:15:18,266 --> 00:15:22,466 for two minutes, and he wants to quit show business?! 372 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,133 God, if only we could put her in a room 373 00:15:24,166 --> 00:15:25,183 with Tori Spelling. 374 00:15:30,383 --> 00:15:33,166 I could kill you. 375 00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:36,416 I could rip out your heart with my bare hands! 376 00:15:39,466 --> 00:15:41,660 She doesn't have a key to the house, does she? 377 00:15:44,233 --> 00:15:46,200 Oh, Mr. Sheffield, 378 00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:49,250 maybe it's all for the best. 379 00:15:49,283 --> 00:15:52,316 No, it is not all for the best, Miss Fine. 380 00:15:52,350 --> 00:15:54,483 It is not all for the best at all. 381 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:56,350 But you yourself said 382 00:15:56,383 --> 00:15:58,183 that the kid was a pain in the butt. 383 00:15:58,216 --> 00:15:59,316 [CHUCKLES] All right, Miss Fine. 384 00:15:59,350 --> 00:16:01,400 Let me see if you can follow this, hm? 385 00:16:01,433 --> 00:16:04,660 Sky...[INHALES] blue. 386 00:16:04,100 --> 00:16:05,450 Fire... [GASPS] hot. 387 00:16:05,483 --> 00:16:07,350 Actor... pain in the butt. 388 00:16:10,830 --> 00:16:12,233 You are going to rectify this situation. 389 00:16:12,266 --> 00:16:13,433 Wow, that sounds painful. 390 00:16:17,350 --> 00:16:19,100 Yes. 391 00:16:19,133 --> 00:16:20,400 Thanks to you, 392 00:16:20,433 --> 00:16:22,250 in eight weeks the curtain goes up 393 00:16:22,283 --> 00:16:25,233 on a 6-foot, 300-pound stage manager 394 00:16:25,266 --> 00:16:27,483 with a mohawk, singing Consider Yourself One of Us. 395 00:16:29,350 --> 00:16:31,283 Well, all right. 396 00:16:31,316 --> 00:16:32,116 What do you have in mind? 397 00:16:34,116 --> 00:16:35,233 You're gonna talk him back into the show. 398 00:16:35,266 --> 00:16:36,383 Oh, but, Mr. Sheffield... 399 00:16:36,416 --> 00:16:39,330 No buts, Miss Fine. 400 00:16:39,660 --> 00:16:40,366 You are going to march yourself upstairs, 401 00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,366 put on something smashing, 402 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,233 take him to the best restaurant in town, 403 00:16:44,266 --> 00:16:46,200 and order the most expensive thing on the menu. 404 00:16:46,233 --> 00:16:48,283 Well, all right, 405 00:16:48,316 --> 00:16:50,160 but I'm not taking the limo! 406 00:16:50,500 --> 00:16:51,300 Oh, yes, you are. 407 00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:57,166 Slave driver! Hmm. 408 00:17:01,660 --> 00:17:03,660 But there is no way 409 00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:05,330 you're gonna buy me a new dress. 410 00:17:05,450 --> 00:17:06,233 Get out! 411 00:17:05,660 --> 00:17:10,266 [WHISPERS] Oh, I-- 412 00:17:10,266 --> 00:17:10,366 [WHISPERS] This close. 413 00:17:16,250 --> 00:17:16,483 WAITER: Right this way. 414 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:19,330 Hello. 415 00:17:19,660 --> 00:17:20,416 Mmm, oh, how's the fish? 416 00:17:24,660 --> 00:17:27,330 Oh, boy, I cannot believe 417 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:29,216 who is sitting right over there. 418 00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:30,483 Oh, you mean Jack Nicholson? 419 00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:32,166 Jack, Jack, over here. How you doin'? 420 00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:37,416 No, no, to the right, to the right. 421 00:17:37,450 --> 00:17:38,433 Oh, you mean Whoopi? 422 00:17:38,466 --> 00:17:40,383 Whoopi, over here. 423 00:17:40,416 --> 00:17:41,166 What's up? How you doin'? 424 00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,350 What, are you blind? 425 00:17:45,383 --> 00:17:47,133 Behind me, behind me. 426 00:17:47,166 --> 00:17:48,233 It's Bob Barker. 427 00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:50,350 Who? 428 00:17:53,316 --> 00:17:55,183 Oh, sir, this table is definitely not gonna work. 429 00:17:55,216 --> 00:17:56,233 I'm in a terrible draft. 430 00:17:57,416 --> 00:17:59,200 Hello. 431 00:17:59,233 --> 00:18:01,283 I'm Fran. 432 00:18:01,316 --> 00:18:03,333 Hello. Bob Barker. 433 00:18:03,366 --> 00:18:05,660 [GIGGLES] 434 00:18:07,660 --> 00:18:09,150 Oh, Bob Barker, 435 00:18:09,183 --> 00:18:11,100 I'm your biggest fan. 436 00:18:11,133 --> 00:18:14,483 I know I'm wearing an animal print, but it's fake. 437 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:19,660 Not these. These are real. I meant the dress. [LAUGHS] 438 00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:21,660 I just want you to know everyone in my family 439 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:22,466 has been spayed and neutered. 440 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,166 Well, their pets. [GIGGLES] 441 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,266 Did I tell you I just love 442 00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:28,500 The Price is Right? 443 00:18:28,830 --> 00:18:30,500 I was just getting the check. 444 00:18:30,830 --> 00:18:31,350 Oh, wait, let me guess. 445 00:18:31,383 --> 00:18:33,266 Pasta primavera, $18.95? 446 00:18:33,300 --> 00:18:34,366 Higher. [SHE GASPS] 447 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,233 Oh, I don't wanna go over. 448 00:18:36,266 --> 00:18:37,216 [BOTH LAUGH] 449 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:39,266 Excuse me. 450 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,150 Bye, Bob, my table's ready. 451 00:18:45,283 --> 00:18:47,330 Oh, I can't believe 452 00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:49,216 you wannna give all of this up. 453 00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:52,116 Fran, I'm been schmoozing since I was two. 454 00:18:52,150 --> 00:18:55,166 My first words were, "I wanna renegotiate." 455 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:57,660 My first words were, "Can I take it back if I wore it?" 456 00:19:00,366 --> 00:19:02,466 Fran, I want you to know that you were right. 457 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,166 I just want to be a regular kid. 458 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,200 Oh, honey, 459 00:19:06,233 --> 00:19:08,250 you can be a regular kid 460 00:19:08,283 --> 00:19:11,283 and still be a big star with an exciting life. 461 00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:13,250 Or you can be the kid sittin' at home, 462 00:19:13,283 --> 00:19:15,150 watchin' TV night after night, 463 00:19:15,183 --> 00:19:17,283 neglecting his studies, getting fired from the bridal shop, 464 00:19:17,316 --> 00:19:19,830 ending up being a nanny-- 465 00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:20,330 We're getting sidetracked here. 466 00:19:21,450 --> 00:19:23,830 But you said that you-- 467 00:19:23,116 --> 00:19:24,830 Oh, forget about what I said. 468 00:19:24,116 --> 00:19:25,483 You've got a gift. 469 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:28,133 Do you think Einstein listened to his nanny 470 00:19:28,166 --> 00:19:29,283 when she said, "Put down the books and comb your hair"? 471 00:19:32,433 --> 00:19:34,466 Fran, I'm no Einstein. 472 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,166 He wrote the theory of relativity. 473 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:38,830 I wrote, "Hey! Yo! Whoa!" 474 00:19:38,116 --> 00:19:39,466 Oh, big deal. 475 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,383 He said emcees are square. 476 00:19:41,416 --> 00:19:43,133 Well, Ed McMahon's been provin' that for years. 477 00:19:46,100 --> 00:19:46,400 F-Fran... 478 00:19:49,366 --> 00:19:50,250 is Mr. Sheffield going to hold me to my contract? 479 00:19:51,466 --> 00:19:54,000 Well, I don't know, honey. 480 00:19:54,330 --> 00:19:56,283 I mean, I'm not a lawyer. 481 00:19:56,316 --> 00:19:58,500 Maybe you should ask the people that you hired 482 00:19:58,830 --> 00:19:59,416 to sue your mommy and your daddy. 483 00:20:04,266 --> 00:20:06,500 [SOBBING] Fran, I can't do this anymore. 484 00:20:06,830 --> 00:20:08,266 Oh, sweetie. 485 00:20:08,300 --> 00:20:11,160 Uh, look, you know what? 486 00:20:11,500 --> 00:20:12,330 I'll talk to Mr. Sheffield. How's that? 487 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:13,466 Hey, Kippy. 488 00:20:15,166 --> 00:20:17,830 [CAMERA CLICKS] 489 00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:20,330 [SOBBING] 490 00:20:23,166 --> 00:20:24,166 Your aspirin, sir. 491 00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,150 Shh. 492 00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:28,450 D'you hear that sucking sound? 493 00:20:28,483 --> 00:20:32,116 That's the investors pulling their money out of my show. 494 00:20:32,150 --> 00:20:34,466 Oh, I too shall lament the loss of Mr. Walker. 495 00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:35,483 He filled the house with tips. 496 00:20:38,116 --> 00:20:39,000 Joy. 497 00:20:42,433 --> 00:20:46,183 Oh, Mr. Sheffield, I'm so proud of you. 498 00:20:46,216 --> 00:20:49,660 You're really doing the right thing. 499 00:20:49,100 --> 00:20:51,150 Every kid deserves to have a normal childhood. 500 00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:53,233 Excuse me. 501 00:20:53,266 --> 00:20:57,116 Brighton, if you throw darts at your Picasso one more time, 502 00:20:57,150 --> 00:20:57,466 I'm taking it out of your room. 503 00:21:00,330 --> 00:21:02,330 Oh, there he is. Be nice. 504 00:21:02,660 --> 00:21:03,483 I am being nice, Miss Fine. 505 00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:05,233 If I weren't, you'd be going with him. 506 00:21:05,266 --> 00:21:07,000 Oh, more of that British humor 507 00:21:07,330 --> 00:21:07,433 I've become so fond of. 508 00:21:10,830 --> 00:21:11,233 Well, I guess I have everything. 509 00:21:11,266 --> 00:21:12,300 Hey, Brighton, see you, man. 510 00:21:12,333 --> 00:21:14,660 Yeah, we'll see ya. 511 00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:15,383 I could cry. 512 00:21:15,416 --> 00:21:16,283 I came this close to having a life. 513 00:21:17,483 --> 00:21:19,366 No, you didn't. 514 00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,200 Oh, Maggie, by the way, 515 00:21:21,233 --> 00:21:22,416 I called Jason Priestley for you. 516 00:21:22,450 --> 00:21:24,266 You did? Yeah. 517 00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:26,216 but he doesn't date women taller than him, 518 00:21:26,250 --> 00:21:28,383 so maybe if you unscrewed your head... 519 00:21:28,416 --> 00:21:30,416 [JACK LAUGHS] Don't go! 520 00:21:33,233 --> 00:21:35,166 Hey, so long, Grace. 521 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:36,433 Sorry we didn't get to know each other better. 522 00:21:36,466 --> 00:21:38,366 That's okay, Fran and I went through all your luggage. 523 00:21:40,250 --> 00:21:42,150 Sweetie, 524 00:21:42,183 --> 00:21:44,000 we were just playing Midnight Express. 525 00:21:45,300 --> 00:21:46,316 Bye, Fran. 526 00:21:46,350 --> 00:21:48,160 Oh, bye, honey. 527 00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:49,830 Have a good childhood. - Thanks. 528 00:21:50,166 --> 00:21:52,660 Mr. Sheffield, 529 00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:52,483 thanks a lot for helping me get out of my contract. 530 00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:54,333 Aww. 531 00:21:54,366 --> 00:21:57,000 Well, it was a pleasure, Jack, 532 00:21:57,330 --> 00:21:58,450 and all the very best of luck to you, hm? 533 00:21:58,483 --> 00:22:00,160 You too. 534 00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:01,183 Safe trip, sir. 535 00:22:01,216 --> 00:22:01,433 Thanks a lot, Niles. 536 00:22:04,300 --> 00:22:06,500 Well, don't you feel good? 537 00:22:07,133 --> 00:22:08,400 I feel poor. 538 00:22:08,433 --> 00:22:09,433 I feel good and poor. 539 00:22:12,150 --> 00:22:13,483 MAGGIE: Oh, God, we just got rid of that twerp 540 00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:15,266 and now he's on "Good Day New York." 541 00:22:15,300 --> 00:22:17,316 Oh, what a life. 542 00:22:17,350 --> 00:22:19,466 Poor boy can't even go back to his childhood in privacy. 543 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,660 Hey! Yo! Whoa! 544 00:22:22,100 --> 00:22:25,100 Jack Walker, America's favorite boy next door, 545 00:22:25,133 --> 00:22:27,333 has settled with the producers of 546 00:22:27,366 --> 00:22:31,133 for a staggering $85,000 a week, 547 00:22:31,166 --> 00:22:33,283 providing he can get out of his Broadway contract. 548 00:22:33,316 --> 00:22:35,133 In this reporter's opinion, 549 00:22:35,166 --> 00:22:36,483 you'd have to be a pretty big Broadway boob 550 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:37,166 to let that happen. 551 00:22:38,283 --> 00:22:39,830 This is Liz Smith. 552 00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:42,183 M-Miss Fine? 553 00:22:42,216 --> 00:22:43,333 [CHUCKLES] 554 00:22:43,366 --> 00:22:45,300 And you said he couldn't act. 555 00:22:48,660 --> 00:22:56,250 [THEME MUSIC PLAYS] 556 00:23:00,216 --> 00:23:02,200 I'd like you to meet my boss, Maxwell Sheffield. 557 00:23:02,233 --> 00:23:03,383 How do you do? 558 00:23:03,416 --> 00:23:05,183 And this is his partner, C.C. Babcock. 559 00:23:05,216 --> 00:23:07,133 Pleasure. And her dog, Chester. 560 00:23:07,166 --> 00:23:09,330 Our own little barker. 561 00:23:09,660 --> 00:23:10,333 Yes. 562 00:23:10,366 --> 00:23:12,366 BOB: What a cute dog. FRAN: Yeah. 563 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:13,400 Don't forget to have him neutered. 564 00:23:13,433 --> 00:23:16,000 [CHESTER GROWLS AND WHINES] 565 00:23:20,166 --> 00:23:21,233 He'll come back. 566 00:23:21,266 --> 00:23:22,316 They never do. 39897

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.