All language subtitles for The Neighbors (2012) S01E17 Larry Bird Presents an Oscar-Winning Film by Larry Bird (1080p AMZN Webrip x265 10bit EAC3 5.1 - TheSickle)[TAoE]_track3_[eng]
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1
00:00:01,372 --> 00:00:03,504
(cheers and applause on tv)
2
00:00:03,504 --> 00:00:05,606
So, guys, what'd you think
Of the oscars?
3
00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:06,607
I loved it.
4
00:00:06,607 --> 00:00:08,079
So much razzle.
5
00:00:08,079 --> 00:00:09,710
So much... Dazzle.
6
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:13,284
I'm just pleased that lace
Is once again a fashion "Do."
7
00:00:13,284 --> 00:00:15,686
The "In memoriam" montage
Was wonderful.
8
00:00:15,686 --> 00:00:17,718
I'd love to meet
Those people someday.
9
00:00:17,718 --> 00:00:19,550
Should we tell--
Nope. No upside.
10
00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:20,691
Right.
11
00:00:20,691 --> 00:00:22,153
Will someone
Come check my homework?
12
00:00:22,153 --> 00:00:23,694
Oh, be right there,
Sweetheart!
13
00:00:23,694 --> 00:00:25,025
Thanks!
14
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,657
Hey, larry,
You all right over there?
15
00:00:26,657 --> 00:00:28,529
No, he's fine.
This happens sometimes
16
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:30,101
When he watches tv.
17
00:00:30,101 --> 00:00:31,102
Um, okay.
18
00:00:31,102 --> 00:00:34,205
Well, you guys
Have a great night.
19
00:00:34,205 --> 00:00:36,167
We'll do it again
Next year.
20
00:00:38,109 --> 00:00:39,710
(whispers) he's fine.
21
00:00:41,172 --> 00:00:45,246
Okay. Let's take a look.
22
00:00:45,246 --> 00:00:46,417
Really, bud?
23
00:00:46,417 --> 00:00:49,150
For 10 times 2,
You went with 100%?
24
00:00:49,150 --> 00:00:50,551
Crushed it.
25
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,052
Well, no.
26
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:54,255
That's all right, buddy.
Just school.
27
00:00:54,255 --> 00:00:56,127
Go brush your teeth.
I'll come up to say good night.
28
00:00:56,127 --> 00:00:58,089
Okay.
29
00:00:58,089 --> 00:00:59,430
Really? It's just school?
30
00:00:59,430 --> 00:01:00,631
It's third grade
Math homework.
31
00:01:00,631 --> 00:01:02,193
I don't want him
To beat himself up.
32
00:01:02,193 --> 00:01:04,395
Well, marty, I think we need
To be a little tougher on him.
33
00:01:04,395 --> 00:01:06,167
You know, I think we need
To push him a little more.
34
00:01:06,167 --> 00:01:08,099
Ah, we push him plenty.
Do we?
35
00:01:08,099 --> 00:01:10,271
Becoming a little fast and loose
With the old fist pump.
36
00:01:10,271 --> 00:01:12,143
You're becoming like
A fist-pump slut.
37
00:01:12,143 --> 00:01:14,074
(chuckles) that's a good one.
38
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,377
Look, you know how my parents
Made me feel growing up,
39
00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:18,809
With the crazy pressure.
40
00:01:18,809 --> 00:01:22,253
I don't wanna get
Like that with max.
41
00:01:26,387 --> 00:01:28,589
Larry?
42
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:29,620
(snaps)
43
00:01:31,362 --> 00:01:33,093
I...
44
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:36,127
Am going to win...
45
00:01:36,127 --> 00:01:38,098
An oscar.
46
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:40,201
Hmm.
47
00:01:40,201 --> 00:01:47,678
♪♪♪
48
00:01:47,678 --> 00:01:50,211
I'm borrowing some dvds.
49
00:01:50,211 --> 00:01:52,543
Only the academy award winners.
50
00:01:52,543 --> 00:01:54,245
Okay, larry. Well,
We're gonna go to bed.
51
00:01:54,245 --> 00:01:55,586
You can take whatever
You want.
52
00:01:55,586 --> 00:01:56,887
Just make sure you shut
The lights before you leave.
53
00:01:56,887 --> 00:01:58,849
I'm borrowing the movies
For research
54
00:01:58,849 --> 00:02:02,393
To help me craft
My own oscar-winning film.
55
00:02:02,393 --> 00:02:04,855
Mm. Fun project. Good night.
56
00:02:08,599 --> 00:02:10,130
When I first arrived here,
57
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:14,235
I wanted to win a nobel prize.
But after watching the oscars,
58
00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:18,169
I realized that the nobel prize
Is just small potatoes.
59
00:02:18,169 --> 00:02:20,771
I mean, can you even name
One nobel prize winner?
(spits)
60
00:02:20,771 --> 00:02:22,713
That's easy--
And don't say nelson mandela.
61
00:02:22,713 --> 00:02:25,376
Oh.
You see,
On your meshugenner planet,
62
00:02:25,376 --> 00:02:28,219
You revere filmmakers
More than peacemakers.
63
00:02:28,219 --> 00:02:33,254
Thus, I shall win the most
Important award you have--oscar.
64
00:02:33,254 --> 00:02:34,425
Bono? No.
Mnh-mnh.
65
00:02:34,425 --> 00:02:36,257
Sean penn? No. Google?
66
00:02:36,257 --> 00:02:38,259
(door closes)
67
00:02:38,259 --> 00:02:40,761
Mom! Dad! I have
The biggest news ever!
68
00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:42,263
Me and dick--
Dick and I.
69
00:02:42,263 --> 00:02:43,934
Really? Biggest news ever,
70
00:02:43,934 --> 00:02:45,296
And you're stopping me
For grammar?
71
00:02:45,296 --> 00:02:46,737
Come on. Come on.
What?
72
00:02:46,737 --> 00:02:49,600
We were picked to compete
In the district spelling bee!
73
00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:50,941
Can you believe it?
74
00:02:50,941 --> 00:02:53,804
No, I-I don't
Believe that, kiddo.
75
00:02:53,804 --> 00:02:56,347
Do you have written proof?
76
00:02:56,347 --> 00:02:58,209
I sure d-o.
77
00:02:58,209 --> 00:02:59,510
Ha ha!
78
00:02:59,510 --> 00:03:01,252
I just can't stop.
I don't know why.
Oh, well...
79
00:03:01,252 --> 00:03:02,613
Um, max, you spelled better
80
00:03:02,613 --> 00:03:04,885
Than every other kid
In your class?
81
00:03:04,885 --> 00:03:07,758
Yeah. Well, a lot were out
With strep throat.
82
00:03:07,758 --> 00:03:09,220
What word did you spell?
83
00:03:09,220 --> 00:03:10,221
They picked the words
Out of a hat,
84
00:03:10,221 --> 00:03:11,822
And I had to spell "Weaver."
85
00:03:11,822 --> 00:03:14,925
Oh. So you got in
By spelling your last name?
86
00:03:14,925 --> 00:03:16,367
Pretty cool, huh?
87
00:03:16,367 --> 00:03:17,768
It's like I was meant
To win the spelling bee!
88
00:03:17,768 --> 00:03:18,929
(laughs)
89
00:03:20,731 --> 00:03:22,403
The district spelling bee.
90
00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:26,307
That means the magnet school
With the gluten-free cafeteria,
91
00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:28,409
And our kid got in
By spelling his last name.
92
00:03:28,409 --> 00:03:30,611
Well, we got a week
To teach him how to spell.
93
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:32,413
I'm gonna get started
On the flash cards.
94
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:34,315
Okay, but please, we just can't
Put too much pressure on him.
95
00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:36,216
I don't want him to get up there
And choke, you know?
96
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:38,389
You remember what happened
With the--
Okay, marty,
97
00:03:38,389 --> 00:03:39,590
We all remember the incident.
98
00:03:39,590 --> 00:03:40,591
I don't know about the incident.
99
00:03:40,591 --> 00:03:41,822
What's the incident?
100
00:03:41,822 --> 00:03:43,594
I'm gonna break out
The vcr.
101
00:03:43,594 --> 00:03:44,655
No, no, no, no, no!
102
00:03:44,655 --> 00:03:46,226
Don't make me watch it.
Please. No.
103
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:49,930
Honey, she needs to know
Where she comes from.
104
00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:52,963
All right, I'm off to zumba
With mary lou retton.
105
00:03:52,963 --> 00:03:54,605
What are you doing, husband?
106
00:03:54,605 --> 00:03:56,407
I'm making
A list of the qualities
107
00:03:56,407 --> 00:03:59,340
Of all
The oscar-winning films,
108
00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:01,011
And then I'll incorporate them
Into my movie
109
00:04:01,011 --> 00:04:03,674
And be a shoo-in
For "Best picture."
110
00:04:03,674 --> 00:04:05,346
I'm up to "The blind side"--
111
00:04:05,346 --> 00:04:07,478
"Best actress," 2010.
112
00:04:07,478 --> 00:04:08,679
Great news, parents!
113
00:04:08,679 --> 00:04:11,322
I got into
The district spelling bee.
114
00:04:11,322 --> 00:04:13,253
Oh, that's wonderful, son.
115
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,555
Do you need me
To help you study?
116
00:04:14,555 --> 00:04:16,827
No, thanks. My intellect
Surpassed yours years ago.
117
00:04:16,827 --> 00:04:20,461
Actually, I don't really
Need you for anything anymore.
118
00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:23,033
Jeez, dick, tell me
How you really feel.
119
00:04:23,033 --> 00:04:25,336
Well, I suppose the only reason
That I still live here
120
00:04:25,336 --> 00:04:28,299
Is because I crave approval
From my father.
121
00:04:28,299 --> 00:04:31,442
Father, I qualified
For a spelling bee.
122
00:04:31,442 --> 00:04:33,904
Yes, and you're being
Quite irritating about it.
123
00:04:33,904 --> 00:04:37,348
Round and round we go.
124
00:04:37,348 --> 00:04:40,411
Care to join me
For "The blind side"?
125
00:04:40,411 --> 00:04:42,313
Apparently it's
A heartwarming story
126
00:04:42,313 --> 00:04:43,484
Of a southern woman
127
00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:46,687
Who takes in a giant black child
Who needs a home.
128
00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:50,521
Oh, I remember what it was like
To be needed by a child.
129
00:04:50,521 --> 00:04:52,923
Though mine's not
A giant black.
130
00:04:52,923 --> 00:04:55,996
More of a petite ginger.
131
00:04:55,996 --> 00:04:56,997
Roll it.
132
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,028
(beeps)
133
00:04:58,028 --> 00:04:59,870
So when your dad
And I started dating,
134
00:04:59,870 --> 00:05:01,332
I thought it would be fun
135
00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:02,933
If we sang "Summer lovin'"
From "Grease"
136
00:05:02,933 --> 00:05:04,335
At the senior recital.
137
00:05:04,335 --> 00:05:06,477
You and I so would not have
Been friends in high school.
138
00:05:06,477 --> 00:05:07,478
Continue.
139
00:05:07,478 --> 00:05:08,709
When my parents found out,
140
00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:10,941
They built it up to be
This huge thing, you know?
141
00:05:10,941 --> 00:05:12,743
Made me practice
Around the clock.
142
00:05:12,743 --> 00:05:14,084
Okay. Just watch.
143
00:05:14,084 --> 00:05:15,616
(band playing "Summer nights")
144
00:05:15,616 --> 00:05:16,617
Oy. (sighs)
145
00:05:16,617 --> 00:05:17,688
(debbie) we did a duet,
146
00:05:17,688 --> 00:05:19,350
And your father
Had the first line,
147
00:05:19,350 --> 00:05:20,851
But he just froze.
148
00:05:20,851 --> 00:05:24,024
♪♪♪
149
00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:27,858
Ugh. I choked
In front of everyone.
150
00:05:27,858 --> 00:05:29,630
Now watch what
She does here. Look.
(debbie, off-key)
♪ summer days, driftin' away ♪
151
00:05:29,630 --> 00:05:30,701
Watch what she does.
Oh, let it go.
152
00:05:30,701 --> 00:05:31,702
Watch.
153
00:05:31,702 --> 00:05:33,864
♪ to, oh, oh, the summer ni-- ♪
154
00:05:33,864 --> 00:05:36,607
♪♪♪
155
00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:37,838
(microphone thuds,
Feedback whines)
156
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:41,972
♪♪♪
157
00:05:41,972 --> 00:05:45,646
(click)
And that, daughter of mine,
Is "The incident."
158
00:05:45,646 --> 00:05:47,347
Thank you.
159
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,780
That was the best thing
We've ever done together.
160
00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:50,951
(exhales)
161
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:56,687
And that's why we can't put
Too much pressure on max.
162
00:05:56,687 --> 00:05:59,029
Okay. We'll be low-key
About it. Casual.
163
00:05:59,029 --> 00:06:01,492
Oh, yeah. Because you're great
At being casual.
164
00:06:01,492 --> 00:06:05,436
No one casually abandons their
Husband on stage quite like you.
165
00:06:05,436 --> 00:06:08,599
Oh, 25 years ago, marty.
Let it go.
166
00:06:08,599 --> 00:06:11,101
Yeah, but it feels
Like yesterday.
167
00:06:11,101 --> 00:06:13,373
♪♪♪
168
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:14,374
(beeps)
169
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,647
"Blind side" is
The most wonderful movie
170
00:06:16,647 --> 00:06:18,509
In the entire world.
171
00:06:18,509 --> 00:06:21,151
I love the way that helpless
Giant needs sandra bullock
172
00:06:21,151 --> 00:06:23,383
To give him a home
And take care of him.
173
00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:25,416
I want a child to blindside.
174
00:06:25,416 --> 00:06:27,788
Oh, I don't think you're using
The term "Blind side" correctly.
175
00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:28,789
Of course I am.
176
00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:29,920
"Blind side," verb--
177
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:31,391
To find a person less fortunate
Than you are
178
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,663
And dramatically
Change his life
179
00:06:32,663 --> 00:06:33,864
So that you feel like
The most important
180
00:06:33,864 --> 00:06:35,426
And most needed person
In the entire world.
181
00:06:35,426 --> 00:06:37,768
I stand corrected.
182
00:06:37,768 --> 00:06:40,971
All right, love dumpling,
I'm off to make my oscar winner.
183
00:06:40,971 --> 00:06:41,972
Wish me luck.
184
00:06:41,972 --> 00:06:43,103
Good luck.
185
00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,835
I don't need luck.
I have my list.
186
00:06:44,835 --> 00:06:46,477
Just like my homeboy,
Schindler.
187
00:06:46,477 --> 00:06:48,739
"Best picture," 1993.
188
00:06:48,739 --> 00:06:49,910
Oh.
189
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,913
Hey, buddy,
Whatcha doing?
190
00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:54,184
Gonna go skateboard.
191
00:06:54,184 --> 00:06:55,446
Hey, I have an idea.
192
00:06:55,446 --> 00:06:58,519
What do you say
We play a game
193
00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:01,652
Where we spell everything
We're gonna do? Watch.
194
00:07:01,652 --> 00:07:03,524
I'm gonna read.
195
00:07:03,524 --> 00:07:05,425
R-e-a-d.
196
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,828
Okay, let's do that.
Max, what are you gonna do?
197
00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:10,861
L-e-v.
198
00:07:10,861 --> 00:07:11,862
Was that "Leave"?
199
00:07:11,862 --> 00:07:13,764
I fear it was.
(door closes)
200
00:07:13,764 --> 00:07:16,507
Mommy, are you ready to have
Our tuesday tea party
201
00:07:16,507 --> 00:07:18,038
With me and the girls?
202
00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:19,970
Oh, baby, another time.
Mommy has to go outside
203
00:07:19,970 --> 00:07:21,612
And trick your brother
Into spelling stuff,
204
00:07:21,612 --> 00:07:23,474
'cause daddy won't let her be
A good mommy.
205
00:07:26,016 --> 00:07:27,548
(door opens)
She says to the 6-year-old
206
00:07:27,548 --> 00:07:29,780
Who she just left alone
In the house.
207
00:07:37,127 --> 00:07:38,889
(amplified voice) and action!
208
00:07:38,889 --> 00:07:40,591
We'll be
209
00:07:40,591 --> 00:07:42,032
Safe here, mama...
210
00:07:42,032 --> 00:07:43,794
(as forrest gump)
Because life is like
211
00:07:43,794 --> 00:07:45,566
A box o' chocolates.
212
00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:46,937
And music!
213
00:07:46,937 --> 00:07:50,571
♪ dum-dum da dum ♪
214
00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:53,473
♪ dum dum da-da da-dum ♪
Oh, no!
Rain man found us!
215
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:54,575
Definitely. Definitely.
216
00:07:54,575 --> 00:07:55,676
You're not real!
217
00:07:55,676 --> 00:07:58,478
You're just a symptom
Of my schizophrenia,
218
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:00,911
The one downside of my...
219
00:08:00,911 --> 00:08:02,553
Beautiful mind.
220
00:08:02,553 --> 00:08:04,484
(brays)
221
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:05,986
Cut! Cut! Cut!
222
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,788
How was that, father?
223
00:08:07,788 --> 00:08:09,019
Absolute drivel.
224
00:08:09,019 --> 00:08:11,592
Apparently,
Stringing together elements
225
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:12,863
From oscar-winning movies
226
00:08:12,863 --> 00:08:14,525
Does not make
A compelling film.
227
00:08:14,525 --> 00:08:15,866
It is harder
Than I thought.
228
00:08:15,866 --> 00:08:18,498
Perhaps, uh, "Best picture"
Is a bit ambitious.
229
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:20,500
If only there was
A kind of film
230
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,002
That didn't require
A script or fancy sets
231
00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,634
Or real actors?
232
00:08:23,634 --> 00:08:25,576
Like those
Tyler perry things?
233
00:08:25,576 --> 00:08:28,609
No. A movie where
We film the world around us?
234
00:08:28,609 --> 00:08:31,782
That's it.
A documentary.
235
00:08:31,782 --> 00:08:33,644
I just need
Something to document.
236
00:08:33,644 --> 00:08:37,517
...C-e-r-o-s. Rhinoceros.
237
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:38,819
Yes.
238
00:08:38,819 --> 00:08:41,622
Everyone loves a movie
About a kid who wins it all.
239
00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,624
Dick, I am going to make a movie
240
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:47,157
About your road
To spelling bee victory.
241
00:08:47,157 --> 00:08:49,900
Fatherly attention?
I'll take it.
242
00:08:49,900 --> 00:08:53,904
Yes. I'm going to win an oscar
For best documentary.
243
00:08:53,904 --> 00:08:56,236
♪ da-dum, da-dum ♪
244
00:08:56,236 --> 00:08:57,708
Thank you.
245
00:09:01,572 --> 00:09:04,575
(whirring)
246
00:09:07,818 --> 00:09:09,219
Sweetheart,
What's the matter?
247
00:09:09,219 --> 00:09:11,652
I was supposed to have
A tea party today,
248
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:14,985
But now nobody
Wants to have one with me.
249
00:09:14,985 --> 00:09:18,088
A child of a different race
In need.
250
00:09:18,088 --> 00:09:20,230
A selfless woman in a vehicle.
251
00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:27,067
(southern accent)
So what you're sayin'
252
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,939
Is that you have nowhere
To have your tea party tonight?
253
00:09:28,939 --> 00:09:29,940
I'm not saying that.
254
00:09:29,940 --> 00:09:31,742
I have a tea set
In my room.
255
00:09:31,742 --> 00:09:33,043
Don't you lie to me.
256
00:09:33,043 --> 00:09:34,945
Why are you talking
Like reba?
257
00:09:34,945 --> 00:09:37,007
Get in.
You're comin' home with me.
258
00:09:37,007 --> 00:09:39,109
Okay.
259
00:09:39,109 --> 00:09:40,651
Blind sided.
260
00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:43,754
...E-m-u-m.
Chrysanthemum.
261
00:09:43,754 --> 00:09:45,155
Right again.
262
00:09:45,155 --> 00:09:47,187
Of course I am.
I memorized the dictionary.
263
00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:49,019
Spell "Porcupine."
264
00:09:49,019 --> 00:09:52,362
P-o-r-c-u-p-I-n-e.
265
00:09:52,362 --> 00:09:53,664
Porcupine.
266
00:09:53,664 --> 00:09:55,095
(under breath)
For the love of god.
267
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,998
Reggie, I'm reviewing my list
Of oscar-winning elements
268
00:09:57,998 --> 00:09:59,630
And getting worried.
Hmm.
269
00:09:59,630 --> 00:10:02,272
Do you feel this has,
"A," dramatic tension...
270
00:10:02,272 --> 00:10:04,775
No.
"B," an underdog...
271
00:10:04,775 --> 00:10:07,708
I am the best speller
In the world.
272
00:10:07,708 --> 00:10:10,340
No.
"C," a relatable lead?
273
00:10:10,340 --> 00:10:12,212
My tail hurts.
274
00:10:12,212 --> 00:10:14,915
Unh-unh.
I'm not even going to
Tell you "D."
275
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,817
Sex appeal.
276
00:10:16,817 --> 00:10:18,949
"D" is sex appeal.
277
00:10:18,949 --> 00:10:21,992
I fear my brother
Is not leading man material.
278
00:10:21,992 --> 00:10:26,797
You're right. We need someone
More... Camera-friendly,
279
00:10:26,797 --> 00:10:29,229
Someone who seems
Like a long shot
280
00:10:29,229 --> 00:10:30,901
To win a spelling bee,
281
00:10:30,901 --> 00:10:34,735
But is so loveable that you
Root for him against all odds.
282
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:35,766
(max) whoa!
(skateboard clacks)
283
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,269
I'm okay!
284
00:10:39,269 --> 00:10:43,714
Maxwell
"Against all odds" weaver.
285
00:10:44,975 --> 00:10:47,748
I am going to make you a star.
286
00:10:52,322 --> 00:10:54,785
(southern accent)
Now I know it's not much.
287
00:11:00,030 --> 00:11:01,361
(whispers) whoa.
288
00:11:03,193 --> 00:11:05,736
(normal voice) I've never had
One of these before.
289
00:11:05,736 --> 00:11:07,267
A room to yourself?
290
00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:10,701
No. A room
Just for tea parties.
291
00:11:11,802 --> 00:11:14,174
Okay, alli,
You sit here,
292
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,206
And funny bunny,
You sit here,
293
00:11:16,206 --> 00:11:18,308
And...
(under breath) blind sided.
294
00:11:18,308 --> 00:11:19,910
Sit up. Okay.
295
00:11:19,910 --> 00:11:22,853
(rock version of "The
Star-spangled banner" playing)
296
00:11:22,853 --> 00:11:26,857
(wheels clacking)
297
00:11:26,857 --> 00:11:30,861
(clicks)
That's my relatable,
All-american boy.
298
00:11:30,861 --> 00:11:32,062
Hello, father.
299
00:11:32,062 --> 00:11:34,965
Shouldn't we get back
To the documentary?
300
00:11:34,965 --> 00:11:36,126
"Tetracycline."
301
00:11:36,126 --> 00:11:39,199
T-e-t-r-a-c-y-c-l-I-n-e.
302
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,801
"Tetracycline."
Dick...
303
00:11:40,801 --> 00:11:42,873
I have some rather
Unfortunate news.
304
00:11:42,873 --> 00:11:45,405
You are no longer the star
Of my documentary.
305
00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:46,977
But it's called
306
00:11:46,977 --> 00:11:49,709
"Larry bird presents dick butkus
Wins the spelling bee."
307
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:50,741
I'm essential.
308
00:11:50,741 --> 00:11:52,282
Son, I'm gonna
Shoot you straight
309
00:11:52,282 --> 00:11:54,885
Because I know that's how
You like to receive information.
310
00:11:54,885 --> 00:11:57,117
No, it isn't. I don't know why
You decided that.
311
00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,489
You aren't relatable,
You're not all-american,
312
00:11:59,489 --> 00:12:01,491
And you keep looking directly
Into my camera lens.
313
00:12:01,491 --> 00:12:04,724
So I'm making another
Documentary. It's called
314
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:08,799
"Larry bird presents
Max weaver--against all odds."
315
00:12:08,799 --> 00:12:11,101
You're making a documentary
About max?
316
00:12:11,101 --> 00:12:12,963
I am.
Now if you'll excuse me,
317
00:12:12,963 --> 00:12:14,234
I have to get back
To editing
318
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:17,307
My "Max skateboards
And is a cutie pie" sequence.
319
00:12:17,307 --> 00:12:18,308
(clicks)
320
00:12:22,312 --> 00:12:23,313
(door opens)
321
00:12:23,313 --> 00:12:24,374
(larry) okay, max,
322
00:12:24,374 --> 00:12:26,376
I really want you to fake up
The humility, okay?
323
00:12:26,376 --> 00:12:29,049
I mean, I don't know
If I'm gonna win the bee,
324
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:32,482
But I'm gonna try my best.
All right. Now cuter.
325
00:12:32,482 --> 00:12:34,324
I mean, I don't know
If I'm gonna win the bee,
326
00:12:34,324 --> 00:12:37,357
But I'm gonna try my best.
327
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:41,291
Okay, what is going on?
Oh. Larry asked me to star
In his documentary.
328
00:12:41,291 --> 00:12:44,394
It's gonna be all about
How I win the spelling bee.
329
00:12:44,394 --> 00:12:47,437
Thanks, larry.
That's just what we needed.
330
00:12:47,437 --> 00:12:48,899
Okay. Let's get spelling.
331
00:12:48,899 --> 00:12:50,340
(larry) oh, good.
You won't even know we're here.
332
00:12:50,340 --> 00:12:52,302
Okay. Shovel.
333
00:12:52,302 --> 00:12:53,844
Oh, debbie. Um...
334
00:12:53,844 --> 00:12:55,405
You think you could get
A stutter going?
335
00:12:55,405 --> 00:12:57,447
I want to get a kind
Of "King's speech"
336
00:12:57,447 --> 00:12:59,549
Thing going here.
Give me your best colin firth.
337
00:12:59,549 --> 00:13:01,481
What time is it?
338
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:02,953
(southern accent)
May I have
339
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:05,185
One of those cookies, abby?
They look simply divine.
340
00:13:06,486 --> 00:13:10,320
Ms. Joyner-kersee,
I miss my mommy.
341
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,022
I know you do, baby.
342
00:13:12,022 --> 00:13:13,363
But she's a drug addict,
343
00:13:13,363 --> 00:13:15,896
And she can't give you the life
My white family can.
344
00:13:17,027 --> 00:13:20,330
(gasps) I think I hear
My mom calling.
345
00:13:20,330 --> 00:13:24,074
What's that? Come home now?
346
00:13:24,074 --> 00:13:27,377
Well, you know my mom
And her rules.
347
00:13:31,211 --> 00:13:34,014
In the end, they all leave.
348
00:13:34,014 --> 00:13:37,017
(max) a-l-o-n-e.
Alone.
349
00:13:37,017 --> 00:13:38,448
Caterpillar.
350
00:13:38,448 --> 00:13:41,291
Guys, enough. I'm tired.
Well, you know
What they say--
351
00:13:41,291 --> 00:13:43,023
Nothing wakes you up
More than spelling.
352
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:44,524
Show me one person
Who says that.
353
00:13:44,524 --> 00:13:47,127
Show me that person
And I'll spell all night.
354
00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:48,358
(door opens)
355
00:13:48,358 --> 00:13:49,359
Check me out, father.
356
00:13:49,359 --> 00:13:51,361
I have
A new all-american look.
357
00:13:51,361 --> 00:13:54,464
What's the hippity haps,
My fellow relatable americans?
358
00:13:54,464 --> 00:13:56,406
Dick, please.
We're recording.
359
00:13:56,406 --> 00:13:58,909
Okay, come on, max.
Caterpillar.
360
00:13:58,909 --> 00:14:00,540
I said I'm tired.
361
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:01,571
Father, do you like
My all-american
362
00:14:01,571 --> 00:14:04,474
Chubby checkers twist?
(grunts)
363
00:14:04,474 --> 00:14:05,475
Dick. Okay,
If you're gonna stay,
364
00:14:05,475 --> 00:14:06,546
You have to be quiet.
365
00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:08,448
Listen, max, we're trying
To help you, okay?
366
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,050
Now come on. Caterpillar.
367
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:11,521
Larry says I don't need help.
368
00:14:11,521 --> 00:14:14,554
Larry says I'm a great story
And I can't lose.
369
00:14:14,554 --> 00:14:17,057
That's right, max.
Really? Well maybe
Larry should be more concerned
370
00:14:17,057 --> 00:14:18,558
With you not
Humiliating yourself.
371
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,093
I'm gonna humiliate myself?
372
00:14:23,093 --> 00:14:24,594
No, sweetie,
That is not what he meant.
373
00:14:24,594 --> 00:14:26,636
That's not what I meant--
Okay, guys, I just need
Some time alone.
374
00:14:26,636 --> 00:14:28,939
Can you please
Just get out?
375
00:14:28,939 --> 00:14:31,341
Okay. Okay.
I will give you a moment.
Please just go.
376
00:14:31,341 --> 00:14:33,543
Please, mom.
But, dick, your hat
Is in the shot.
377
00:14:33,543 --> 00:14:36,506
That's it.
Nothing I do makes you proud.
378
00:14:36,506 --> 00:14:38,578
What are you talking about?
You, too.
379
00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:40,310
Just need a quick 2-shot.
That's it.
No.
380
00:14:40,310 --> 00:14:41,451
And then I'll be...
You do not get a 2-shot.
381
00:14:41,451 --> 00:14:44,955
Out of your hair.
No. Go.
382
00:14:46,086 --> 00:14:47,457
(sighs)
383
00:14:47,457 --> 00:14:50,190
Well, at least
Vertical stripes are slimming.
384
00:14:55,265 --> 00:14:56,997
Shh. Shh. Shh.
385
00:14:56,997 --> 00:14:57,998
(door opens)
Here they come.
386
00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,429
Sound speed.
Action!
387
00:15:01,331 --> 00:15:03,133
You're gonna do great
Today, honey.
388
00:15:03,133 --> 00:15:04,504
Yeah. We believe in you,
Kiddo.
389
00:15:04,504 --> 00:15:06,276
Yeah, well,
You didn't last night.
390
00:15:06,276 --> 00:15:07,507
I need to focus.
391
00:15:07,507 --> 00:15:08,939
(marty) all right. All right.
392
00:15:08,939 --> 00:15:10,640
Wanna sit together,
Ms. Joyner-kersee?
393
00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:12,582
That depends.
Are you ready to start acting
394
00:15:12,582 --> 00:15:15,445
Like an impoverished
300-pound black man?
395
00:15:15,445 --> 00:15:17,617
Yeah, I'll be
Right there, mom!
396
00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:19,519
Ball and chain.
397
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,121
(larry) reggie, boom!
398
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,623
Careful not to record me,
Father.
399
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:25,325
Wouldn't want
Someone so unrelatable
400
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:27,027
Tainting your documentary.
401
00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:28,698
Oh, dick, get off it.
402
00:15:29,699 --> 00:15:31,261
(marty) oh, great,
Here he comes.
403
00:15:31,261 --> 00:15:34,334
No. Not so close.
No filming in the car.
404
00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:35,635
Give me that.
(larry) one quick shot in here,
Debbie, and I'll be out.
405
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:37,667
Give me the freakin'--
(static crackles)
406
00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:40,670
(indistinct conversations)
407
00:15:42,372 --> 00:15:43,943
This is crazy.
408
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,216
I can't spell.
409
00:15:46,216 --> 00:15:48,718
What am I even doing here?
410
00:15:53,984 --> 00:15:55,685
(amplified voice)
"Libraries"--
411
00:15:55,685 --> 00:15:59,659
L-I-b-r-a-r-I-e-s.
"Libraries."
It's almost max's turn.
412
00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:01,191
I can't watch.
413
00:16:01,191 --> 00:16:04,734
(scattered applause)
(amplified voice)
Next up is dick...
414
00:16:04,734 --> 00:16:06,236
Butkus.
415
00:16:06,236 --> 00:16:07,467
(beeps)
416
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:10,600
(orchestra playing
"Yankee doodle")
417
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:15,245
♪♪♪
418
00:16:15,245 --> 00:16:19,479
(amplified voice) hello, my
Fellow red-white-and-blue-ies.
419
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:22,082
Uh... Hello.
420
00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:24,184
Your word is "Cylinder."
421
00:16:24,184 --> 00:16:27,487
Though my father doesn't see it,
I'm as american as apple pie.
422
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:29,689
Can I get a round of sound?
423
00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,261
(scattered applause)
424
00:16:31,261 --> 00:16:34,694
Okay.
Please spell "Cylinder."
425
00:16:34,694 --> 00:16:37,697
C-y-l-I-n-d-e-r. See you
Next round, guys and dolls.
426
00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:39,329
(scattered applause,
Audience murmuring)
427
00:16:39,329 --> 00:16:42,432
Next up, max weaver.
428
00:16:42,432 --> 00:16:43,633
(whispers) here's our boy.
429
00:16:49,579 --> 00:16:55,645
Max, your word is "Resource."
430
00:16:55,645 --> 00:16:57,547
(amplified voice) resource.
431
00:16:57,547 --> 00:16:58,648
(exhales deeply)
432
00:16:58,648 --> 00:17:00,050
R...
433
00:17:00,050 --> 00:17:03,393
E...
434
00:17:03,393 --> 00:17:05,755
Uh...
435
00:17:05,755 --> 00:17:08,628
Oh, no. Why isn't
He saying more letters?
I don't know.
436
00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:11,231
Oh, god. He's choking
Just like I did.
437
00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:15,335
"The incident" part two--
"The incident strikes back."
438
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:16,606
(max) r...
439
00:17:16,606 --> 00:17:18,338
E...
440
00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:20,340
Starting over.
441
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,072
R...
442
00:17:22,072 --> 00:17:24,544
Starting over.
443
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:26,716
Uh...
444
00:17:26,716 --> 00:17:29,379
(audience gasps and murmurs)
445
00:17:29,379 --> 00:17:35,255
♪ summer lovin',
Had me a blast ♪
446
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:39,559
♪ summer lovin'... ♪
447
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:40,630
Uh...
448
00:17:40,630 --> 00:17:42,132
♪ sum... ♪
449
00:17:42,132 --> 00:17:43,463
♪ su-- ♪
450
00:17:43,463 --> 00:17:46,696
♪ happened so fast ♪
451
00:17:46,696 --> 00:17:50,200
(together)
♪ summer days driftin' away ♪
Third act plot twist.
452
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:52,742
Move! Making a movie here.
Move!
453
00:17:52,742 --> 00:17:54,304
♪ summer nights ♪
454
00:17:54,304 --> 00:17:56,606
Uh...
Um...
455
00:17:56,606 --> 00:17:58,248
It's, uh...
456
00:17:58,248 --> 00:18:00,510
What...
Does it go--what is--
It goes, uh...
457
00:18:00,510 --> 00:18:01,681
Oh, my god.
458
00:18:01,681 --> 00:18:05,185
"Well-a well-a well-a, unh."
459
00:18:05,185 --> 00:18:09,859
Tell me more. Tell me more.
Did you get very far?"
460
00:18:09,859 --> 00:18:12,422
(lowered voice) supporting
Actors. Original song.
461
00:18:12,422 --> 00:18:14,594
I'm going to win
Every oscar.
462
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:18,568
♪ yeah, we got friendly
Down in the sand, yeah, yeah ♪
463
00:18:18,568 --> 00:18:20,200
(debbie and marty, off-key)
♪ summer heat ♪
464
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,232
♪ boy and girl meet ♪
465
00:18:22,232 --> 00:18:26,376
♪ oh-oh, oh, the summer nights ♪
466
00:18:26,376 --> 00:18:27,377
Okay. He's gone.
467
00:18:27,377 --> 00:18:29,809
♪ it turned colder ♪
468
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:33,343
♪ that's where it ends ♪
469
00:18:33,343 --> 00:18:35,114
(lowered voice)
Deb, it's over now, so...
Oh. All right.
470
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,687
Come on. Come on.
Let's go.
471
00:18:37,687 --> 00:18:38,688
(popping)
472
00:18:38,688 --> 00:18:40,720
And all that anyone
Will remember
473
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:43,623
Are the crazy people
That started singing.
474
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,695
Thanks again, guys.
That's what
We're here for, kiddo.
475
00:18:45,695 --> 00:18:46,896
And we're also here
To help you
476
00:18:46,896 --> 00:18:48,798
When you have trouble
With stuff, okay?
477
00:18:48,798 --> 00:18:50,800
We're gonna start buckling down
On the homework a little more.
478
00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,663
Finally some structure.
479
00:18:53,663 --> 00:18:55,635
I've been drowning over here.
480
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:58,368
Told ya.
481
00:19:02,212 --> 00:19:03,643
(sighs)
482
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,876
Look, I'm sorry I got bored of
My tea room, ms. Joyner-kersee.
483
00:19:06,876 --> 00:19:09,779
It was nice for a while...
484
00:19:09,779 --> 00:19:11,781
Until it got weird.
485
00:19:11,781 --> 00:19:12,882
So you did need me?
486
00:19:12,882 --> 00:19:15,154
Mm... Sure.
487
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:18,788
Would you say
That I changed your life?
No.
488
00:19:18,788 --> 00:19:20,560
Can you just say
That I changed your life?
489
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:21,561
Okay.
490
00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:23,162
You changed my life.
491
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:26,436
(southern accent)
No, big abby. You changed mine.
492
00:19:26,436 --> 00:19:27,437
(exhales)
493
00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:30,800
(under breath) blind sided.
494
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,542
You should see a therapist.
495
00:19:32,542 --> 00:19:33,803
Okay, larry, we're all here
496
00:19:33,803 --> 00:19:35,805
To watch
Your oscar-winning movie.
497
00:19:35,805 --> 00:19:37,777
Yes. Uh, my movie.
498
00:19:37,777 --> 00:19:43,883
Um, may I present
"A spelling bee movie"?
499
00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:47,917
(dave thomas junior's
"3 wishes" playing)
500
00:19:47,917 --> 00:19:51,221
C-y-l-I-n-d-e-r. See you
Next round, guys and dolls.
501
00:19:51,221 --> 00:19:54,724
(applause)
502
00:19:54,724 --> 00:19:57,327
This right here
Is zabvronian d.N.A.
503
00:20:01,671 --> 00:20:03,503
(lowered voice) father,
This isn't about max.
504
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:06,806
No. I, um...
I went in a different direction.
505
00:20:06,806 --> 00:20:09,909
♪ what they'd be ♪
506
00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:12,482
You missed my mom and dad
Performing?
507
00:20:12,482 --> 00:20:14,944
And the part where debbie got
Frisked outside the building.
508
00:20:14,944 --> 00:20:16,886
Dude, you missed
Everything important.
509
00:20:16,886 --> 00:20:19,589
Well, I suppose
That's a matter of opinion.
510
00:20:19,589 --> 00:20:23,723
♪ I tell you what they'd be ♪
511
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:24,754
(lowered voice) I don't think
512
00:20:24,754 --> 00:20:26,796
This is your oscar winner,
Father.
513
00:20:26,796 --> 00:20:30,760
That's all right.
I'll get 'em next time.
514
00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:32,932
♪ would be all... ♪
515
00:20:32,932 --> 00:20:34,404
(static crackles)
516
00:20:34,404 --> 00:20:37,907
(lowered voice) 13 days
Since the weavers' arrival.
517
00:20:37,907 --> 00:20:39,939
They seem
Relatively harmless.
(marty snoring)
518
00:20:39,939 --> 00:20:41,711
What was that?
Um...
519
00:20:41,711 --> 00:20:43,913
Oh, um...
Here. Hold your brother!
520
00:20:43,913 --> 00:20:44,914
(debbie) what is that?
(all shouting at once)
521
00:20:44,914 --> 00:20:47,317
(debbie) why would you do that?!
522
00:20:47,317 --> 00:20:50,950
You guys crossed the line!
You crossed the line!
523
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:52,622
More popcorn, anyone?
524
00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:58,928
(imitating dustin hoffman)
For god sake, mrs. Robinson.
525
00:20:58,928 --> 00:21:00,390
You got me into your house,
You pour me a drink,
526
00:21:00,390 --> 00:21:01,691
You turn on music,
Now you're telling me
527
00:21:01,691 --> 00:21:03,763
Your husband
Won't be home for hours?
528
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:06,636
(seductive orchestral score
Playing)
(larry's voice) so?
529
00:21:06,636 --> 00:21:09,739
Mrs. Robinson,
You're trying to seduce me.
530
00:21:09,739 --> 00:21:13,803
(larry chuckles)
531
00:21:13,803 --> 00:21:15,905
Aren't you?
532
00:21:15,905 --> 00:21:16,976
(click, music stops)
533
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:22,812
I could have been a star.
38301
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