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"Fantastic Easter Special"
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00:00:09,639 --> 00:00:13,091
I'm going down to South Park,gonna have myself a time,
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00:00:13,126 --> 00:00:16,350
Friendly faces everywhere,humble folks without temptation,
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00:00:16,381 --> 00:00:19,693
I'm goin out to South Park,gonna leave my woes behind,
5
00:00:19,709 --> 00:00:23,040
Ample parking day or night,people spouting howdy neighbor,
6
00:00:23,072 --> 00:00:26,153
I'm heading out to South Park,gonna see if I can't unwind,
7
00:00:26,262 --> 00:00:29,771
I like fucking silly bitches
and I know my penis likes it.
8
00:00:29,806 --> 00:00:32,759
So come on down to South Parkand meet some friends of mine,
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00:00:36,215 --> 00:00:40,362
...In my Easter Bonnet,
with all the frills upon it,
10
00:00:40,412 --> 00:00:45,148
I'll be the grandest lady
in the Easter parade.
11
00:00:45,471 --> 00:00:46,817
Look at that one, huh?
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00:00:46,867 --> 00:00:49,735
Half purple and half yellow
with a Chikadee sticker.
13
00:00:50,136 --> 00:00:51,286
I'm good.
14
00:00:51,904 --> 00:00:53,337
Uh, can I ask a question?
15
00:00:53,890 --> 00:00:54,958
Why do we do this?
16
00:00:56,977 --> 00:00:59,646
Wha... what do you mean,
"Why do we do this?" It's Easter!
17
00:00:59,696 --> 00:01:01,914
Right, so,
why do we color eggs?
18
00:01:04,091 --> 00:01:06,913
Well, so that the
Easter bunny can hide them.
19
00:01:07,353 --> 00:01:08,468
Yeah, but why?
20
00:01:08,989 --> 00:01:12,241
Stanley, Easter celebrates
the day that Jesus was resurrected
21
00:01:12,291 --> 00:01:14,891
after being crucified
for our sins.
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00:01:15,844 --> 00:01:18,774
So we dip eggs in colored vinegar
and a giant rabbit hides them?
23
00:01:18,824 --> 00:01:19,685
That's right.
24
00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:21,611
You don't see the missteps
in logic with that?
25
00:01:22,325 --> 00:01:25,239
Look, I'm just saying that somewhere
between Jesus dying on the cross
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00:01:25,289 --> 00:01:28,525
and a giant bunny hiding eggs there
seems to be a, a gap of information.
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00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:30,731
Stanley, just dye
your goddamned eggs!
28
00:01:30,781 --> 00:01:33,162
I don't feel like coloring eggs!
I don't get it!
29
00:01:33,821 --> 00:01:35,533
What is wrong with him?
30
00:01:35,583 --> 00:01:37,667
Well, he's just
getting older, Randy.
31
00:01:37,717 --> 00:01:39,990
Maybe he figured out
the Easter bunny isn't real.
32
00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:45,639
You know so little!
33
00:01:51,014 --> 00:01:53,364
And I want a Baltor
soldier doll for Easter,
34
00:01:53,478 --> 00:01:55,875
and five Crash'n'Go RC cars,
you got that?
35
00:01:56,308 --> 00:01:57,155
Do you have that?!
36
00:01:57,216 --> 00:02:00,127
- Ahh, don't you think that's--
- No, no! You don't ask me questions.
37
00:02:00,395 --> 00:02:02,309
You are a rabbit!
I am a human.
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00:02:02,359 --> 00:02:05,952
So if you don't bring me what I want
for Easter, I can fucking kill you!
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00:02:06,002 --> 00:02:06,888
Smile!
40
00:02:08,473 --> 00:02:09,609
Bye, Easter bunny!
41
00:02:10,295 --> 00:02:11,115
Oh my God.
42
00:02:12,121 --> 00:02:14,115
All right, can you please explain
to me what's going on?
43
00:02:14,171 --> 00:02:14,928
Huh?
44
00:02:14,934 --> 00:02:16,435
What is the deal with
the coloring the eggs
45
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,505
and you hiding them
and all that?
46
00:02:17,555 --> 00:02:19,448
What does that have to do
with Jesus dying on the cross?
47
00:02:20,812 --> 00:02:21,808
Is it symbolic?
48
00:02:22,030 --> 00:02:24,264
Are you trying to reference something
that happened in Biblical times?
49
00:02:25,136 --> 00:02:25,934
Answer me!
50
00:02:26,713 --> 00:02:28,892
Look, kid ahh, I'm j--
I'm just a guy in a costume.
51
00:02:29,460 --> 00:02:30,543
I know that!
52
00:02:30,578 --> 00:02:32,714
But I figure you must have
some knowledge of what Easter's about
53
00:02:32,715 --> 00:02:34,362
if you're playing the
Easter Bunny at the mall!
54
00:02:35,332 --> 00:02:37,903
Easter's just Easter.
Just, just go with it, kid.
55
00:02:37,987 --> 00:02:39,412
No, I'm not gonna
just go with it!
56
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,258
I'm gonna find out
what's behind all this!
57
00:02:42,413 --> 00:02:44,128
I need a break.
Can I have a break?
58
00:02:50,274 --> 00:02:51,554
We have a problem.
59
00:02:52,643 --> 00:02:54,014
Somebody's onto us.
60
00:02:54,732 --> 00:02:57,054
Yeah, he's askin'
a lot of questions.
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00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:00,853
Only a matter of time before
he finds out what Easter's really about.
62
00:03:02,167 --> 00:03:04,396
Yes, I understand
what must be done.
63
00:03:05,405 --> 00:03:06,533
Call the others.
64
00:03:47,713 --> 00:03:48,849
Mom? Dad?
65
00:03:50,634 --> 00:03:51,763
Anybody home?
66
00:03:52,041 --> 00:03:54,268
Not now, Stanley,
I'm on the toilet.
67
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:58,576
- Dad! You've gotta help me!
- Hang on, I'm taking a crap.
68
00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:00,744
Dad! There's Easter bunnies
chasing me!
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00:04:00,779 --> 00:04:01,494
What?
70
00:04:01,495 --> 00:04:03,640
They chased me from the mall!
I don't know what they want!
71
00:04:04,096 --> 00:04:06,108
They're coming in!
Dad, open the door!
72
00:04:11,140 --> 00:04:11,839
Dad?
73
00:04:12,438 --> 00:04:14,831
We... need to talk, Stan.
74
00:04:15,866 --> 00:04:17,357
I--It's okay, guys.
75
00:04:18,295 --> 00:04:19,725
- Randy?
- Yeah.
76
00:04:20,294 --> 00:04:22,332
'Cause it turns out the kid
we're after is my son.
77
00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:25,192
Ohh.
78
00:04:25,794 --> 00:04:28,065
Tell the Grand Hare
everything is okay.
79
00:04:28,962 --> 00:04:30,026
I'll take it from here.
80
00:04:31,878 --> 00:04:33,709
I wanted to keep this
from you, Stan.
81
00:04:34,383 --> 00:04:36,422
I really wanted to wait
until you were older but...
82
00:04:36,855 --> 00:04:38,710
You just had to keep
asking questions!
83
00:04:38,913 --> 00:04:40,888
Why were those other
rabbit guys chasing me?
84
00:04:41,033 --> 00:04:43,748
We have to be careful when
we think somebody's onto us.
85
00:04:44,154 --> 00:04:46,908
We are all part of
a secret society, Stan.
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00:04:47,261 --> 00:04:49,819
A very ancient,
very important society of men
87
00:04:50,108 --> 00:04:54,256
who follow the way of the Rabbit, and
protect the secret of the Easter bunny.
88
00:04:55,025 --> 00:04:57,575
We are called...
the Hare Club For Men.
89
00:05:00,822 --> 00:05:02,144
Does Mom
know about this?
90
00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:05,414
Duh, it's the Hare Club For Men.
Chicks wouldn't understand.
91
00:05:05,693 --> 00:05:06,841
I don't understand!
92
00:05:07,300 --> 00:05:11,050
I belong to a secret society that
has been around for thousands of years!
93
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:13,022
Our identities
have to be protected!
94
00:05:13,232 --> 00:05:15,319
Could, could you,
take off, the ears, please?
95
00:05:15,353 --> 00:05:17,869
Stan, you don't seem to
understand how serious this is!
96
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:19,455
The secret of Easter
that we protect
97
00:05:19,505 --> 00:05:23,490
is something that could rock
the foundation of the entire world!
98
00:05:23,554 --> 00:05:25,325
So what is
the secret of Easter?
99
00:05:25,375 --> 00:05:29,213
I can't tell you. You have to be
allowed into the Society first, but...
100
00:05:30,107 --> 00:05:32,175
but perhaps...
it's time.
101
00:05:35,622 --> 00:05:37,085
I always knew
this day would come,
102
00:05:37,269 --> 00:05:39,415
when my son would be
brought into the society.
103
00:05:39,924 --> 00:05:42,069
Reminds me of the day
I was brought in by my father.
104
00:05:42,186 --> 00:05:44,238
- Grandpa's in it too?
- Of course.
105
00:05:44,626 --> 00:05:47,132
Marshes have been in the
Hare Club For Men for generations.
106
00:05:47,559 --> 00:05:48,819
All the way
back to the beginning.
107
00:05:49,221 --> 00:05:51,458
Dad, do I have to wear this bag
over my head the entire time?
108
00:05:51,758 --> 00:05:55,712
You aren't a member yet. You can't know
where our secret meetings take place.
109
00:05:56,209 --> 00:05:57,932
We're going
to a distant location,
110
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an old building near
a lake about 40 minutes away.
111
00:06:01,122 --> 00:06:02,506
You mean
the old Galveston Lodge?
112
00:06:08,126 --> 00:06:09,317
Damnit.
113
00:06:13,602 --> 00:06:15,542
- Hey Bill.
- Evenin' Marcus.
114
00:06:15,577 --> 00:06:18,096
- Heh heh hey, look at you!
- Hey everybody.
115
00:06:21,185 --> 00:06:24,305
Stan Marsh, welcome!
You must be very excited.
116
00:06:25,025 --> 00:06:25,930
Must I?
117
00:06:26,071 --> 00:06:28,462
There he is!
There's my grandson!
118
00:06:28,892 --> 00:06:31,402
- Hi, Grandpa.
- I'm proud of ya, Billy.
119
00:06:31,726 --> 00:06:32,477
Stan.
120
00:06:51,349 --> 00:06:52,814
Attention, members!
121
00:06:53,467 --> 00:06:58,056
Tonight, we determine if a new member
is worthy of protecting the Secret.
122
00:06:58,836 --> 00:07:01,037
Bring out...
the rabbit.
123
00:07:01,873 --> 00:07:08,538
Sanctum Piter oteum,Deus ore uneum.
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00:07:08,588 --> 00:07:13,594
Hippitus hoppitusreus homine.
125
00:07:13,629 --> 00:07:19,941
In suspiratoreum,lepus in re sanctum.
126
00:07:19,991 --> 00:07:24,995
Hippitus hoppitusDeus Domine.
127
00:07:31,047 --> 00:07:33,626
All hail the cute rabbit,
Snowball!
128
00:07:33,928 --> 00:07:35,652
Hail Snowball.
129
00:07:35,893 --> 00:07:37,208
Stan Marsh,
130
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,481
are you ready to hear
the secret of Easter?
131
00:07:40,896 --> 00:07:42,880
- Yeah.
- Are you sure, son?
132
00:07:42,957 --> 00:07:46,573
Once you hear the secret, you will be
bound to The Hare Club For Men forever.
133
00:07:46,608 --> 00:07:47,897
Yeah, I wanna know already.
134
00:07:48,517 --> 00:07:49,764
Very well.
135
00:07:49,814 --> 00:07:53,458
At the Last Supper,
Jesus Christ met with his 12 disciples.
136
00:07:53,513 --> 00:07:54,624
It was there that--
137
00:07:57,998 --> 00:08:00,308
- They found us!
- Protect Snowball!
138
00:08:07,596 --> 00:08:08,791
They're everywhere!
139
00:08:18,125 --> 00:08:19,299
Come on,
we've gotta go!
140
00:08:22,459 --> 00:08:24,650
Stan, take Snowball
and get out of here!
141
00:08:24,663 --> 00:08:27,099
- Where am I supposed to go?
- Just get out of here!
142
00:08:33,127 --> 00:08:34,477
Where is the rabbit?
143
00:08:43,406 --> 00:08:44,889
Where are you taking us?
144
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,276
No! I'm not goin' anywhere!
145
00:08:50,953 --> 00:08:52,063
Jesus Christ!
146
00:08:53,126 --> 00:08:54,993
Who did you give
the rabbit to?
147
00:08:58,163 --> 00:09:01,022
Search the area!
The boy could not have gotten far!
148
00:09:01,854 --> 00:09:02,799
Oh no...
149
00:09:16,910 --> 00:09:17,445
Help.
150
00:09:18,453 --> 00:09:19,606
What happened?
151
00:09:20,049 --> 00:09:22,499
My Dad's in a rabbit-worshiping
cult called the Hare Club For Men,
152
00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:24,355
they protect the secret of Easter
but before they said what it was,
153
00:09:24,390 --> 00:09:26,534
they were attacked by ninjas
and put me in charge of Snowball.
154
00:09:29,150 --> 00:09:30,867
I'm kind of fingerpainting
right now.
155
00:09:31,565 --> 00:09:34,707
Dude, they took my Dad away.
They even shot one of his fellow hares.
156
00:09:34,732 --> 00:09:36,378
And now
they're after me!
157
00:09:36,379 --> 00:09:37,566
Do you know
anything about Easter?
158
00:09:37,567 --> 00:09:39,924
What is the connection between
Jesus and rabbits and colored eggs?
159
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:43,359
Dude, I'm Jewish.
I have no idea.
160
00:09:51,614 --> 00:09:52,179
Nelson.
161
00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:56,198
Nelson?
Nelson, say something.
162
00:09:56,524 --> 00:09:59,800
My legs. I...
I think they're broken.
163
00:10:00,054 --> 00:10:02,498
Nelson, do you know where we are?
Where did they take us?
164
00:10:02,864 --> 00:10:07,607
Don't know. We traveled for hours...
kept blacking out...
165
00:10:13,304 --> 00:10:14,121
You...
166
00:10:19,114 --> 00:10:22,199
Hi, we'd like to speak
to a Professor Teabag?
167
00:10:23,321 --> 00:10:26,283
- What is it in regard to?
- The history of Easter.
168
00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:30,453
Sorry boys, it's a little late
for me to be giving lectures.
169
00:10:31,533 --> 00:10:33,883
Please? Do you know anything
about the Hare Club For Men?
170
00:10:37,376 --> 00:10:40,665
The Keepers?
The Guardians of the Secret?
171
00:10:41,091 --> 00:10:43,847
My dad is in it.
This... rabbit is too somehow.
172
00:10:44,023 --> 00:10:44,958
Come on in.
173
00:10:47,699 --> 00:10:50,792
The Hare Club For Men
has been around for centuries.
174
00:10:51,044 --> 00:10:54,544
One of its most famous members
was Leonardo da Vinci.
175
00:10:57,290 --> 00:10:58,703
Behold the Last Supper.
176
00:10:59,246 --> 00:11:03,134
The dinner Christ had with his disciples
the night before he was crucified.
177
00:11:03,770 --> 00:11:05,403
What food do you see
on the table?
178
00:11:06,460 --> 00:11:08,407
- Just bread...
- Really?
179
00:11:08,961 --> 00:11:10,147
Look to Jesus' right.
180
00:11:10,639 --> 00:11:12,968
The food which is a little
different color than the others.
181
00:11:14,901 --> 00:11:17,289
It kind of looks like...
an egg.
182
00:11:17,782 --> 00:11:20,241
Yes. The egg
marks the secret.
183
00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:23,542
It lies directly in front of...
Saint Peter.
184
00:11:23,925 --> 00:11:25,098
Who is Saint Peter?
185
00:11:25,294 --> 00:11:27,647
He was the disciple that
Jesus made into the first pope.
186
00:11:27,981 --> 00:11:29,146
Eggsactly.
187
00:11:29,838 --> 00:11:32,110
But there's something
the Church didn't tell you.
188
00:11:32,731 --> 00:11:35,681
In actuality,
Peter wasn't a man at all.
189
00:11:36,089 --> 00:11:38,967
Saint Peter... was a rabbit.
190
00:11:40,862 --> 00:11:42,033
Peter Rabbit.
191
00:11:42,083 --> 00:11:45,124
Of course, the Church wouldn't allow
da Vinci to paint Peter as a rabbit,
192
00:11:45,174 --> 00:11:48,975
so he painted him as a man,
but left clues. Look closely.
193
00:11:49,765 --> 00:11:52,376
- I don't see it.
- Look closelier.
194
00:11:53,477 --> 00:11:57,230
- He looks like a guy.
- Look more closelier.
195
00:12:00,507 --> 00:12:03,130
With laser technology,
we can look beneath the paint,
196
00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:05,251
the way da Vinci
originally painted it.
197
00:12:08,494 --> 00:12:10,604
That... is Saint Peter.
198
00:12:11,224 --> 00:12:13,430
The original Pope
of Christianity.
199
00:12:13,870 --> 00:12:14,907
I don't believe it.
200
00:12:15,441 --> 00:12:16,274
Proof is everywhere.
201
00:12:16,335 --> 00:12:18,532
Look at the Pope's hat.
It makes no sense,
202
00:12:18,737 --> 00:12:21,234
except that it was originally
designed... for a rabbit.
203
00:12:22,792 --> 00:12:25,208
But why would Jesus want
a rabbit to run his church?
204
00:12:25,299 --> 00:12:27,541
Because Jesus knew
no one man
205
00:12:27,591 --> 00:12:29,639
could speak for everyone
in a religion.
206
00:12:29,770 --> 00:12:32,530
Men can be intolerant;
rabbits are pure.
207
00:12:32,808 --> 00:12:35,640
But the Catholic Church buried
the truth, put a man in charge,
208
00:12:36,046 --> 00:12:38,901
and the Hare Club For Men
has been decorating eggs ever since
209
00:12:38,902 --> 00:12:41,543
to keep the secret in
da Vinci's painting alive.
210
00:12:42,271 --> 00:12:44,895
So... the Vatican
took Stan's dad?
211
00:12:53,329 --> 00:12:57,373
You dare to mock God by telling
people St. Peter was a rabbit?
212
00:12:57,709 --> 00:13:00,599
You monster!
You have no right to wear that hat!
213
00:13:01,209 --> 00:13:04,904
Trying to tell people that St. Peter
was a rabbit is blasphemy!
214
00:13:05,340 --> 00:13:07,827
You must admit you are wrong
or burn in hell!
215
00:13:08,603 --> 00:13:10,443
It's saying stupid things
like that
216
00:13:10,444 --> 00:13:12,682
that made Jesus wanna
put a rabbit in charge.
217
00:13:12,911 --> 00:13:15,128
I'm sorry I couldn't bring you
the rabbit, Your Holiness,
218
00:13:15,284 --> 00:13:16,467
but they know
where it is!
219
00:13:16,940 --> 00:13:19,884
The rabbit you call Snowball
is a threat to Christ's Church.
220
00:13:19,885 --> 00:13:21,574
Where is the rabbit?
221
00:13:21,936 --> 00:13:24,681
I don't know!
And even if I did know...
222
00:13:25,352 --> 00:13:27,704
Well, I'd probably tell you
because I don't wanna be here anymore.
223
00:13:28,595 --> 00:13:31,843
- Take him to be tortured!
- Tortured, huh, but Bill...
224
00:13:32,361 --> 00:13:36,447
All this... torturing and ninjas,
it just doesn't seem very Christian.
225
00:13:36,572 --> 00:13:39,129
You asked for the help
of the American Catholic League,
226
00:13:39,179 --> 00:13:41,236
let us do our job!
Take him!
227
00:13:41,643 --> 00:13:45,262
No! No, you bunny-hating bastards!
Don't do this!
228
00:13:48,357 --> 00:13:51,748
I don't get it. Why would the Pope
be holding my Dad hostage for Snowball?
229
00:13:52,149 --> 00:13:55,168
I believe Snowball must be a
direct descendant of St. Peter himself,
230
00:13:55,978 --> 00:13:58,133
and therefore the true heir
of the Pope's throne.
231
00:14:03,039 --> 00:14:04,587
Mr. Teabag!
Get out!
232
00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,580
- They found me!
- Boys, get out of here!
233
00:14:10,732 --> 00:14:13,076
Head to the woods!
I'll try to buy you some time.
234
00:14:13,901 --> 00:14:14,982
Check upstairs!
235
00:14:18,002 --> 00:14:19,588
Upstairs clear!
Try the office!
236
00:14:28,157 --> 00:14:28,864
In here!
237
00:14:30,585 --> 00:14:31,271
What's that?
238
00:14:36,512 --> 00:14:37,792
Peeps!
239
00:14:44,435 --> 00:14:45,339
So what now?
240
00:14:46,019 --> 00:14:47,279
If the Pope has my dad...
241
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:49,821
I have to give him
what he wants.
242
00:14:50,039 --> 00:14:51,803
You aren't just gonna hand
Snowball over?
243
00:14:51,941 --> 00:14:54,557
What choice do I have?
There's nobody left who can help us!
244
00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:56,273
Wait...
245
00:14:57,377 --> 00:14:58,259
Unless...
246
00:14:59,068 --> 00:14:59,990
maybe there is.
247
00:15:01,663 --> 00:15:02,652
Here, hold this.
248
00:15:08,188 --> 00:15:08,887
Jesus,
249
00:15:09,756 --> 00:15:11,517
I know we haven't talked
in a long time,
250
00:15:12,570 --> 00:15:15,094
and I know that every time you appear,
we end up killing you somehow, but...
251
00:15:16,343 --> 00:15:17,436
I don't know
what to do.
252
00:15:18,248 --> 00:15:19,696
And I could really use
your help.
253
00:15:30,851 --> 00:15:32,602
I think the rabbit
just crapped on my jacket.
254
00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:38,907
Live, from the Vatican,it's our Easter Vigil coverage.
255
00:15:39,700 --> 00:15:44,429
As Holy Saturday comes to an end,
the Easter Vigil at the Vatican begins.
256
00:15:44,747 --> 00:15:46,845
Thousand have turned out
to hear the Pope
257
00:15:46,876 --> 00:15:48,692
and celebrate the Resurrection.
258
00:15:49,128 --> 00:15:52,519
For this Easter vigil, the Pope
is also showing his divine grace
259
00:15:52,569 --> 00:15:55,839
by feeding the poor,
with a massive rabbit stew.
260
00:15:57,547 --> 00:15:58,528
No!
261
00:15:58,797 --> 00:16:00,321
No! No, don't put m--
262
00:16:01,540 --> 00:16:03,287
Bill, this seems extreme.
263
00:16:03,576 --> 00:16:05,275
The child who has the rabbit
has to know
264
00:16:05,325 --> 00:16:08,671
that we are willing to kill the hostages
if he doesn't hand it over.
265
00:16:08,729 --> 00:16:11,604
Your Holiness,
a child has arrived witha the rabbit!
266
00:16:12,134 --> 00:16:12,947
You see?
267
00:16:16,145 --> 00:16:17,235
Oh, thank God!
268
00:16:17,473 --> 00:16:19,314
Hand it over, Stan!
They're gonna kill me!
269
00:16:19,349 --> 00:16:20,397
Give them the rabbit!
270
00:16:20,567 --> 00:16:21,953
Yes, hand it over!
271
00:16:22,594 --> 00:16:24,932
First, you have to promise
you won't hurt it!
272
00:16:25,155 --> 00:16:26,459
And that
you'll let everybody go!
273
00:16:26,956 --> 00:16:30,111
- We promise.
- We swear it, on the cross.
274
00:16:30,349 --> 00:16:32,163
Just hand over
the bunny, Stan!
275
00:16:32,576 --> 00:16:33,460
Okay, fine.
276
00:16:37,342 --> 00:16:38,868
Stanley,
why did you do that?
277
00:16:38,971 --> 00:16:40,826
I would have proudly died
for that rabbit.
278
00:16:41,009 --> 00:16:42,922
- You said, "Hand over the bunny."
- No!
279
00:16:43,125 --> 00:16:44,831
That is not the way
we're remembering it!
280
00:16:44,888 --> 00:16:46,173
Take them into custody!
281
00:16:46,746 --> 00:16:47,799
Hey, what the hell!
282
00:16:48,286 --> 00:16:50,497
Bill, we have zeh rabbit,
it's all we need.
283
00:16:50,691 --> 00:16:52,443
Don't be soft,
Your Holiness!
284
00:16:52,476 --> 00:16:55,086
These "whores" must be
punished in front of everyone!
285
00:16:55,136 --> 00:16:57,032
You swore
on the cross, fatso!
286
00:16:57,255 --> 00:16:59,527
Yeah.
Too bad for you...
287
00:16:59,577 --> 00:17:01,427
it was a double cross!
288
00:17:02,612 --> 00:17:04,333
Oh, we should've seen
that coming!
289
00:17:04,774 --> 00:17:08,448
Bill, I'm not sure that double
crossing people is very Christian.
290
00:17:08,648 --> 00:17:10,776
It is what
Christ would've wanted!
291
00:17:11,136 --> 00:17:13,264
Who are you to say that?
292
00:17:16,898 --> 00:17:18,842
It... can't be.
293
00:17:19,088 --> 00:17:19,898
- Jesus!
- Jesus!
294
00:17:20,612 --> 00:17:25,836
He is risen.He is risen.
295
00:17:26,422 --> 00:17:31,859
Let the voices singhis praises on this holy day.
296
00:17:31,946 --> 00:17:34,167
He is risen!
297
00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:37,301
Jesus, we thought you died.
In Iraq.
298
00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:40,724
I have the power of resurrection.
Or have you forgotten?
299
00:17:41,075 --> 00:17:43,594
You all seem to have
forgotten a lot of things.
300
00:17:43,742 --> 00:17:45,347
Jesus, you did
answer my prayer!
301
00:17:45,469 --> 00:17:47,787
Actually, I was answering
the prayer of Nick Donovan.
302
00:17:48,207 --> 00:17:49,763
Ohh, that's me. Neato!
303
00:17:50,159 --> 00:17:53,626
This is exactly why I put a rabbit
in charge of the Church, Benedictus!
304
00:17:54,004 --> 00:17:56,276
Because men are
so easily led astray.
305
00:17:56,746 --> 00:18:00,952
St. Peter was a rabbit.
And a rabbit should be Pope.
306
00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:04,073
- Kill him!
- What?!
307
00:18:04,256 --> 00:18:06,211
He goes against the Church.
He must die!
308
00:18:06,219 --> 00:18:07,424
All right,
that does it, Bill.
309
00:18:07,474 --> 00:18:10,445
I'm pretty sure that killing Jesus
is not very Christian.
310
00:18:10,527 --> 00:18:12,192
You are soft! Weak!
311
00:18:12,227 --> 00:18:14,057
You leave me no choice:
take them!
312
00:18:15,050 --> 00:18:15,979
What are you doing?!
313
00:18:16,455 --> 00:18:17,464
I am ze Pope!
314
00:18:17,705 --> 00:18:20,910
You are no longer able
to fulfill your duties to the Lord!
315
00:18:21,038 --> 00:18:23,125
The Easter Vigil will go on
as planned!
316
00:18:23,467 --> 00:18:25,672
Every Hare Club member,
young and old,
317
00:18:25,722 --> 00:18:28,384
will watch as their
precious savior dies!
318
00:18:28,550 --> 00:18:30,202
What is your problem, guy?
319
00:18:30,395 --> 00:18:33,673
Lock up those two Jews!
We'll deal with them later.
320
00:18:34,198 --> 00:18:35,548
No! No!
321
00:18:35,936 --> 00:18:38,469
A strange turn of events
here at the Vatican:
322
00:18:38,519 --> 00:18:40,683
Pope Benedictus
has stepped down,
323
00:18:40,733 --> 00:18:43,832
ushering the new era of...
Pope Bill Donohue.
324
00:18:44,222 --> 00:18:45,201
My people!
325
00:18:45,426 --> 00:18:48,341
This Easter I'm gonna start
by making our rabbit stew
326
00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:50,308
ten times meatier!
327
00:18:51,787 --> 00:18:54,391
No! Listen!
We aren't rabbits!
328
00:18:57,581 --> 00:18:59,247
Forgive me, Jesus.
329
00:18:59,250 --> 00:19:01,170
We'll never get out in time
to stop him!
330
00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:03,200
Don't you have
any superpowers?
331
00:19:03,389 --> 00:19:05,616
Not as a mortal.
Only in death.
332
00:19:06,508 --> 00:19:08,185
Wait. That's it.
333
00:19:08,782 --> 00:19:11,831
We have no choice, Kyle.
You're going to have to kill me.
334
00:19:13,296 --> 00:19:14,958
- What?
- Stab me with this.
335
00:19:15,201 --> 00:19:17,967
If I die, I can resurrect
outside the bars.
336
00:19:18,463 --> 00:19:20,516
N-no way!
Do it yourself.
337
00:19:20,713 --> 00:19:23,788
Suicide is blasphemy.
There's no choice here, Kyle!
338
00:19:23,891 --> 00:19:25,898
Dude, you don't understand,
I'm a Jew.
339
00:19:25,933 --> 00:19:27,745
I have a few hangups
about killing Jesus.
340
00:19:27,795 --> 00:19:31,221
Just make it quick. Through the neck.
I'll arise again immediately.
341
00:19:32,669 --> 00:19:33,849
Don't make me
do this.
342
00:19:33,908 --> 00:19:36,208
My son, there is no time.
Do it!
343
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:39,322
Eric Cartman can never
know about this.
344
00:19:39,372 --> 00:19:41,605
I understand.
And Kyle,
345
00:19:42,086 --> 00:19:44,427
- happy Easter.
- Happy Easter, Jesus.
346
00:19:59,682 --> 00:20:00,571
Jesus?
347
00:20:01,492 --> 00:20:06,237
Behold, no longer will Easter
be about bunnies and colored eggs!
348
00:20:06,898 --> 00:20:08,148
Kill the rabbit!
349
00:20:10,005 --> 00:20:11,357
Sorry, little bunny.
350
00:20:13,135 --> 00:20:14,178
Snowball!
351
00:20:21,326 --> 00:20:22,326
Jesus?
352
00:20:22,421 --> 00:20:23,188
Stop!
353
00:20:23,588 --> 00:20:25,821
That rabbit is
of holy descent!
354
00:20:26,017 --> 00:20:28,458
Why won't you
go away?!
355
00:20:28,755 --> 00:20:31,869
One man cannot be
the voice of the Church!
356
00:20:32,142 --> 00:20:35,363
Enough of this blasphemy!
I'm the Pope now!
357
00:20:35,618 --> 00:20:39,005
That means
I am the voice of God!
358
00:20:39,166 --> 00:20:42,612
Not anymore.
I'm removing you from your position.
359
00:20:57,611 --> 00:20:59,611
Yay!
360
00:20:59,813 --> 00:21:01,077
All right, Jesus!
361
00:21:04,882 --> 00:21:11,623
Sanctum Piter oteum,Deus ore uneum.
362
00:21:11,658 --> 00:21:16,370
Hippitus hoppitusreus homine.
363
00:21:16,834 --> 00:21:18,097
Your Holiness,
364
00:21:18,263 --> 00:21:21,720
what should we tell the world
about how to run their lives?
365
00:21:24,276 --> 00:21:25,834
It isn't
saying anything.
366
00:21:26,014 --> 00:21:28,955
Yes, just as
a-Jesus intended it.
367
00:21:31,455 --> 00:21:33,403
Stanley,
I'm so proud of you.
368
00:21:33,438 --> 00:21:35,395
You've learned so
very much this Easter.
369
00:21:35,396 --> 00:21:37,296
Yeah. I've learned
not to ask questions.
370
00:21:37,331 --> 00:21:38,901
Just dye the eggs
and keep my mouth shut.
371
00:21:39,078 --> 00:21:40,090
That's my boy.
372
00:21:40,529 --> 00:21:44,876
Hippitus hoppitusDeus Domine.
373
00:22:09,869 --> 00:22:14,536
Sync and Edits: VeRdiKT
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