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1
00:00:01,144 --> 00:00:05,143
Anyone watching, thinking we know
fuck all about knowing fuck all
2
00:00:05,144 --> 00:00:07,903
about owt, needs
to watch their back...
3
00:00:07,904 --> 00:00:10,303
So you've had your Labour,
reclassifying skunk,
4
00:00:10,304 --> 00:00:13,423
sending prices sky-high - literally.
5
00:00:13,424 --> 00:00:16,244
Literally, taking the grass
from its own roots!
6
00:00:16,306 --> 00:00:19,101
Now you've got the ConDemNation.
7
00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:22,594
Liberals nozzing Tories like altar boys
picking dimps up.
8
00:00:22,626 --> 00:00:26,505
Have we had
a national fucking stroke or what?!
9
00:00:26,506 --> 00:00:30,025
Is revolution a word,
or was it never?
10
00:00:30,026 --> 00:00:33,745
Anybody watching needs to know
we cope better than average
11
00:00:33,746 --> 00:00:35,385
with irony in Chatsworth.
12
00:00:35,386 --> 00:00:39,385
Well, for fuck's sake,
we live in Manchester,
13
00:00:39,506 --> 00:00:42,585
and they charge us for water!
14
00:00:42,586 --> 00:00:44,665
I wandered lonely as a clown
15
00:00:44,666 --> 00:00:46,545
Necking mushrooms rarely found
16
00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:50,145
This green and pleasant land
of ancient times...
17
00:00:50,146 --> 00:00:52,745
Yak, yak, yak,
yak, yak, yak, yak!
18
00:00:52,746 --> 00:00:56,025
..it's not theirs any more.
19
00:00:56,026 --> 00:00:58,505
This is our England now!
20
00:00:58,506 --> 00:01:02,505
Party!
21
00:01:06,826 --> 00:01:09,065
'Some people are born bad.
22
00:01:09,066 --> 00:01:10,945
'Some are born good.
23
00:01:10,946 --> 00:01:13,505
'You know,
got a lot of love to give.'
24
00:01:13,506 --> 00:01:16,585
Mam.You want a kid of your own,
go and make one.
25
00:01:16,586 --> 00:01:18,625
'And I'm not talking carnal.
26
00:01:18,626 --> 00:01:21,065
'Cos if you can't
get a shag on a Saturday night,
27
00:01:21,066 --> 00:01:24,545
'there's summat
seriously wrong with you.
28
00:01:24,546 --> 00:01:28,545
'I'm talking unconditional. I want someone
to love who loves me as much as I love them.
29
00:01:30,426 --> 00:01:33,345
'Someone to have a trust with.
30
00:01:33,346 --> 00:01:37,345
'An understanding.'
31
00:01:43,466 --> 00:01:46,745
You're all right, Dad,
we'll get our own(!)
32
00:01:46,746 --> 00:01:50,345
'I want a meeting of minds.
33
00:01:50,346 --> 00:01:51,105
'So...'
34
00:01:51,106 --> 00:01:52,465
JUKEBOX PLAYS
35
00:01:52,466 --> 00:01:56,465
♪ Can anybody
36
00:01:59,626 --> 00:02:03,585
♪ Find me
37
00:02:03,586 --> 00:02:07,585
♪ Somebody to love?
38
00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:14,465
♪ Each morning I get up,
I die a little
39
00:02:14,466 --> 00:02:16,705
♪ Can barely stand on my feet
40
00:02:16,706 --> 00:02:18,545
♪ Take a look at yourself
41
00:02:18,546 --> 00:02:20,545
♪ I take a look in the mirror
42
00:02:20,546 --> 00:02:24,305
♪ And cry, Lord,
what you doing to me?
43
00:02:24,306 --> 00:02:27,465
I've spent all my years
in believing you
44
00:02:27,466 --> 00:02:30,305
♪ But I just can't get no relief
45
00:02:30,306 --> 00:02:31,905
♪ Lord, somebody
46
00:02:31,906 --> 00:02:32,905
♪ Somebody
47
00:02:32,906 --> 00:02:33,585
♪ Somebody
48
00:02:33,586 --> 00:02:34,665
♪ Somebody
49
00:02:34,666 --> 00:02:38,185
♪ Can anybody find me...? ♪
50
00:02:38,186 --> 00:02:40,545
'Fuck that.
I'm not on me last legs yet.'
51
00:02:40,546 --> 00:02:43,945
I've got so much love to give.
I just need someone to give it to.
52
00:02:43,946 --> 00:02:47,945
I've got Trixie on a special.
You and a mate, two's up, 20 quid.
53
00:02:48,026 --> 00:02:51,025
Chicken in a basket, as much
advocaat as you can hold down.
54
00:02:51,026 --> 00:02:55,025
And she's as tight as a gnat's chuff
since her trip to Thailand.
55
00:02:59,586 --> 00:03:03,585
'Then just when you least expect it,
just what you least expect.'
56
00:03:20,186 --> 00:03:21,785
You paid for it?
57
00:03:21,786 --> 00:03:23,505
A charitable donation.
58
00:03:23,506 --> 00:03:24,905
And it's a her, not an it.
59
00:03:24,906 --> 00:03:26,145
Vermin in China.
60
00:03:26,146 --> 00:03:28,705
Soy sauce, spring onion.
Main course in Vietnam.
61
00:03:28,706 --> 00:03:30,265
Filthy fuckers.
62
00:03:30,266 --> 00:03:34,265
Dusty doesn't like being watched when
she eats. Dusty?
63
00:03:34,826 --> 00:03:35,865
It's the eyes.
64
00:03:35,866 --> 00:03:38,425
Take 'em off the cat and put them
on a blonde bird with a beehive
65
00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:41,425
and she'd be singing Son Of
A Preacher Man, I'm telling you.
66
00:03:41,426 --> 00:03:44,185
Oh!
Surprise.
67
00:03:44,186 --> 00:03:45,545
Eternity ring. >
68
00:03:45,546 --> 00:03:48,385
Stones are guaranteed shatter-proof,
colour never fades.
69
00:03:48,386 --> 00:03:49,545
Rings are symbolic.
70
00:03:49,546 --> 00:03:50,665
Eternal.
71
00:03:50,666 --> 00:03:52,985
Cos there's no beginning and no end.
72
00:03:52,986 --> 00:03:54,905
Like your love for Kelly!
73
00:03:54,906 --> 00:03:58,905
100% cubic zirconia.
74
00:04:01,146 --> 00:04:03,305
So, the cat's for...?
75
00:04:03,306 --> 00:04:06,625
She needed a home.
76
00:04:06,626 --> 00:04:08,585
So does Pissy Percy from the subway.
77
00:04:08,586 --> 00:04:12,385
You'd better not be
dragging him back here.
78
00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:14,705
The ring.
79
00:04:14,706 --> 00:04:18,705
You've only just put it down!
80
00:04:24,226 --> 00:04:28,225
(DUSTY MEOWS)
81
00:04:31,226 --> 00:04:34,505
I will slit the little
bastard's guts open, Mickey!
82
00:04:34,506 --> 00:04:36,745
She might not have eaten it.
Yeah?
83
00:04:36,746 --> 00:04:40,745
Then where the fuck's it gone?!
84
00:04:44,266 --> 00:04:45,345
Half an hour, max.
85
00:04:45,346 --> 00:04:49,345
Starting now.
86
00:04:49,386 --> 00:04:50,745
Come to Daddy.
87
00:04:50,746 --> 00:04:54,745
Come to Daddy.
88
00:04:55,426 --> 00:04:58,065
Gandhi's called me up to Bradford.
89
00:04:58,066 --> 00:05:00,105
Granddad? For...?
90
00:05:00,106 --> 00:05:03,185
Wants to see the books, how I'm
managing the place. I'm not going.
91
00:05:03,186 --> 00:05:04,505
He might cut your supplies off.
92
00:05:04,506 --> 00:05:07,225
He can cut my balls off.
I'm going nowhere.
93
00:05:07,226 --> 00:05:11,225
Got a couple of cars need your Midas touch.
I need you to drop one off, pick one u
94
00:05:11,866 --> 00:05:14,465
I'm helping Ches at the shop.
I did mention it, Jay.
95
00:05:14,466 --> 00:05:18,465
If they're not clean, there won't be a drop tomorrow.
No drop, no job the next
96
00:05:30,626 --> 00:05:31,465
I'll get your cleaning stuff.
97
00:05:31,466 --> 00:05:34,505
You're not eating into my profits.
You'll get your own.
98
00:05:34,506 --> 00:05:35,345
And I'll bell you later
for the where and when.
99
00:05:35,346 --> 00:05:37,065
All right.
100
00:05:37,066 --> 00:05:38,345
Child labour?
101
00:05:38,346 --> 00:05:41,865
Put the Great in Britain.
102
00:05:41,866 --> 00:05:45,865
Once upon a time, you could rely on a spliff
to do what it says on the tin.
103
00:05:46,506 --> 00:05:50,505
These days, it takes a quarter to do
the job of what an eighth used to.
104
00:05:54,746 --> 00:05:57,425
See? Who'd have thought
getting stoned in this day
105
00:05:57,426 --> 00:06:01,425
and age would be such
a fucking problem?
106
00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:05,985
No offence.
107
00:06:19,986 --> 00:06:22,345
What the fuck's that?!
Language!
108
00:06:22,346 --> 00:06:23,105
What's it look like?
109
00:06:23,106 --> 00:06:26,145
Like my allergy in a fur coat.
110
00:06:26,146 --> 00:06:28,185
If she goes, the mice stay.
It's your call.
111
00:06:28,186 --> 00:06:29,625
Mice?
112
00:06:29,626 --> 00:06:31,905
Shane reckons she swallowed a ring
he got for Kel.
113
00:06:31,906 --> 00:06:34,625
Waiting for nature
to take its course.
114
00:06:34,626 --> 00:06:36,145
Can you do it outside? The baby.
115
00:06:36,146 --> 00:06:37,745
You're right.
116
00:06:37,746 --> 00:06:40,585
The laxatives'll be kicking in
any second now.Laxatives?!
117
00:06:40,586 --> 00:06:42,985
(SCREAMS)
118
00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:46,985
Any luck?
119
00:06:53,866 --> 00:06:57,865
Any washing missing?
No.
120
00:06:58,826 --> 00:07:00,305
What's up?
121
00:07:00,306 --> 00:07:04,305
Something missing off our washing line.
What?
122
00:07:04,586 --> 00:07:05,985
My knickers.
123
00:07:05,986 --> 00:07:07,665
How many pairs?
124
00:07:07,666 --> 00:07:11,665
Just the one.
125
00:07:14,186 --> 00:07:15,865
That's open.
126
00:07:15,866 --> 00:07:17,105
Bradford ain't my dream destination.
127
00:07:17,106 --> 00:07:18,785
This one?
128
00:07:18,786 --> 00:07:22,465
But at least it'll
get me away from her.
129
00:07:22,466 --> 00:07:24,185
She's all right, Sita.
130
00:07:24,186 --> 00:07:26,185
She's a good girl.
131
00:07:28,026 --> 00:07:32,025
Till the second after
you've fucked 'em!
132
00:07:32,026 --> 00:07:33,025
We've only got half an hour.
133
00:07:33,026 --> 00:07:35,025
I need to pack.
134
00:07:35,026 --> 00:07:38,705
Auntie Uzma's done it. Socks and undies for the week.
Couple of vests.Right.
135
00:07:38,706 --> 00:07:40,065
Laters, bro.
136
00:07:40,066 --> 00:07:41,905
See you in a bit.
137
00:07:41,906 --> 00:07:44,585
I'm leaving you in charge, not her.
138
00:08:05,666 --> 00:08:09,665
Ta-da!
139
00:08:09,666 --> 00:08:11,345
An eternity ring?
Yeah.
140
00:08:11,346 --> 00:08:14,825
It took a fucking eternity to
get it out of that thing!
141
00:08:14,826 --> 00:08:17,265
Explain.The ring was
stuck in her ring.
142
00:08:17,266 --> 00:08:20,865
Procedure, got it out, realised
143
00:08:20,866 --> 00:08:24,865
she wasn't feeling herself, did
a blood test, and then...she's dying.
144
00:08:27,746 --> 00:08:31,225
She's got the AIDS.
145
00:08:31,226 --> 00:08:34,665
Maybe the kindest thing would be
to spare her any more pain. >
146
00:08:34,666 --> 00:08:38,665
It might be wise to think
about...getting her put to sleep.
147
00:08:40,506 --> 00:08:42,625
Would you have had
Liberace put down?!
148
00:08:42,626 --> 00:08:45,905
No. Freddie Mercury? No!
149
00:08:45,906 --> 00:08:48,385
Dusty will die surrounded by love.
150
00:08:48,386 --> 00:08:49,945
My love.
151
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:53,945
Does she look like
she's any sort of danger?
152
00:08:54,146 --> 00:08:58,145
Sweet Jesus, Mickey,
you could be infected.
153
00:09:03,186 --> 00:09:05,065
Got any Spaghetti Hoops?
154
00:09:05,066 --> 00:09:07,465
We've got Alphabetti.
155
00:09:07,466 --> 00:09:10,665
I'm dyslexic.
156
00:09:10,666 --> 00:09:16,345
30 float, I've took 32.80 since you've
left, so that's 62.80. You can count it.
157
00:09:16,346 --> 00:09:19,905
Can you stomach beans with your,
you know, weakness?
158
00:09:19,906 --> 00:09:20,945
Is anyone serving?
159
00:09:20,946 --> 00:09:21,745
Yeah, sorry, one minute.
160
00:09:21,746 --> 00:09:25,745
I'll handle this.
161
00:09:26,506 --> 00:09:28,185
3.69, please.
162
00:09:28,186 --> 00:09:29,985
I can eat 'em
just as long as I'm sitting down.
163
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:33,985
Thank you.
164
00:09:37,866 --> 00:09:40,385
Count it?
165
00:09:40,386 --> 00:09:41,585
When I cash up.
166
00:09:41,586 --> 00:09:43,705
I do not rob mates.
167
00:09:43,706 --> 00:09:47,625
Ches told me to look after the place, and
that's what I'll do, like it or not.
168
00:09:47,626 --> 00:09:49,065
You got that?
169
00:10:00,146 --> 00:10:04,145
If I get me hands on you, I'll have
yer bollocks for earrings!
170
00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:06,945
Are you OK?
171
00:10:06,946 --> 00:10:08,865
No! Me knickers have gone again!
172
00:10:08,866 --> 00:10:10,985
I think we should get
the police involved.
173
00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:13,185
What are those useless bastards
going to do?
174
00:10:13,186 --> 00:10:16,585
You're not the only woman round here.
Avril's in danger, Letitia's in danger.
175
00:10:16,586 --> 00:10:18,625
Danger of what?
176
00:10:18,626 --> 00:10:21,265
There's a sexual deviant
on the loose.
177
00:10:21,266 --> 00:10:22,705
Throw a rock round here,
you'd hit a dozen.
178
00:10:22,706 --> 00:10:24,425
Someone's stealing underwear.
179
00:10:24,426 --> 00:10:28,425
Maybe the best thing is to dry them
indoors from now on.
180
00:10:29,026 --> 00:10:32,385
I'm not having my behaviour
dictated to by some fucking nonce.
181
00:10:32,386 --> 00:10:33,905
The knickers stay.
182
00:10:33,906 --> 00:10:35,385
Where's my pussy?
183
00:10:35,386 --> 00:10:39,385
It kicked Cilla off with her asthma.
184
00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:52,945
Wanker.
185
00:10:52,946 --> 00:10:56,145
We have to keep it
away from the baby.
186
00:10:56,146 --> 00:10:57,905
I want that thing out.
187
00:10:57,906 --> 00:11:01,625
It's a fucking liability.
188
00:11:01,626 --> 00:11:04,105
I didn't know you could get
queer cats.
189
00:11:04,106 --> 00:11:05,865
Dusty's female.
190
00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:09,185
How the fuck did she get the AIDS,
then? Is she a cat lesbian?
191
00:11:09,186 --> 00:11:11,105
Can lesbians get the AIDS?
192
00:11:11,106 --> 00:11:13,585
How can you even think like that?
193
00:11:13,586 --> 00:11:15,825
It's the 21st century,
for fuck's sake!
194
00:11:15,826 --> 00:11:18,105
I've asked for counselling.What?
195
00:11:18,106 --> 00:11:20,465
And how are they going to do that,
you soft twat?
196
00:11:20,466 --> 00:11:23,065
It's not like she can tell you
how she's feeling.
197
00:11:23,066 --> 00:11:26,625
For me, you bastard, not her!
198
00:11:26,626 --> 00:11:30,625
She's facing a messy,
painful, elon...gelas...
199
00:11:33,786 --> 00:11:37,785
Er... A really drawn-out death.
200
00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:40,945
And I'm going to guarantee a
dignified ending to this lady's life.
201
00:11:40,946 --> 00:11:42,825
You could have it yourself.
202
00:11:42,826 --> 00:11:44,265
You can't catch the AIDS from a cat.
203
00:11:44,266 --> 00:11:45,545
She fucking did.
204
00:11:45,546 --> 00:11:49,145
And if you catch it
from a toilet seat...
205
00:11:49,146 --> 00:11:51,985
It's all body fluids,
not just jizz and fanny batter.
206
00:11:51,986 --> 00:11:54,625
It's tears, spit, puke, piss.
207
00:11:54,626 --> 00:11:58,145
I don't want one of us being
the first to catch it from a sneeze.
208
00:11:58,146 --> 00:12:00,265
That's ridiculous.
209
00:12:00,266 --> 00:12:03,825
So's fucking a monkey,
but that's where it came from.
210
00:12:03,826 --> 00:12:06,945
You don't think someone's been
slotting the cat one, do you?
211
00:12:06,946 --> 00:12:08,505
You can't catch the AI...
212
00:12:08,506 --> 00:12:12,265
It's not even called AIDS -
it's FIDS.
213
00:12:12,266 --> 00:12:15,705
Feline Immune...
214
00:12:15,706 --> 00:12:16,745
..DS.
215
00:12:16,746 --> 00:12:19,665
Dusty needs care.
216
00:12:19,666 --> 00:12:21,065
And tenderness.
217
00:12:21,066 --> 00:12:24,385
And love.
218
00:12:24,386 --> 00:12:28,385
And if you feel that there's
no place in this house for her...
219
00:12:28,786 --> 00:12:32,665
..then there's no place for me.
220
00:12:32,666 --> 00:12:34,025
Ugh!
221
00:12:34,026 --> 00:12:38,025
(DUSTY MEOWS)
222
00:12:42,577 --> 00:12:44,976
Just scraping out.
But you know that already.
223
00:12:44,977 --> 00:12:47,276
I've got better things to do
than sit watching you earn minimum wage.
224
00:12:47,277 --> 00:12:49,755
What is it with you?
Thought we were getting on.
225
00:12:49,756 --> 00:12:51,915
Got anything for a gyppy tummy?
226
00:12:51,916 --> 00:12:53,355
This is a family business.
227
00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:56,475
Not family and cousin's mates.
Gyppy how?
228
00:12:56,476 --> 00:13:00,475
Bit like buses. You wait ages for
one, then three come all at once.
229
00:13:04,236 --> 00:13:07,595
Well, cousin's mate will be out
of there as soon as he's done.
230
00:13:07,596 --> 00:13:08,907
Give you a chance to get
your pulse back to normal.
231
00:13:08,908 --> 00:13:09,876
How many times, Carl?
232
00:13:09,877 --> 00:13:11,875
You're not my type.
I meant whenever I went in the till.
233
00:13:11,876 --> 00:13:14,395
I handle a bit of cash,
your blood pressure goes up.
234
00:13:14,396 --> 00:13:16,035
You can go now. I'll finish up.
235
00:13:16,036 --> 00:13:18,795
Assuming I'm a thief?
Assuming I'll rob you blind?
236
00:13:18,796 --> 00:13:20,273
I never said...
237
00:13:20,274 --> 00:13:23,753
It's been like this since day one.
Grew up on a council estate - scum.
238
00:13:23,754 --> 00:13:27,073
Went to a comp - scum.
Has a pint - scum.
239
00:13:27,074 --> 00:13:28,873
Dad's a waster - scum.
240
00:13:28,874 --> 00:13:31,593
Asian - uptight.
University - uptight.
241
00:13:31,594 --> 00:13:33,793
Non-drinker - uptight. Non-smoker...
242
00:13:33,794 --> 00:13:34,793
You know nothing about me.
243
00:13:34,794 --> 00:13:36,313
Ditto.
244
00:13:36,314 --> 00:13:40,113
I'm here because I know, and you don't, that
Ches wants to make a proper go at this.
245
00:13:40,114 --> 00:13:43,473
He's working his balls off. He asked
for my help and I said yes.
246
00:13:43,474 --> 00:13:47,393
So grab that and make yourself
useful, or shut the f...
247
00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:51,393
..or get off my back.
248
00:13:55,954 --> 00:13:58,753
Is your cat dead yet?
249
00:13:58,754 --> 00:14:00,273
No, she fucking isn't!
250
00:14:00,274 --> 00:14:04,193
This car'll stink soon,
you not washing and her decaying.
251
00:14:04,194 --> 00:14:05,473
I don't need this!
252
00:14:05,474 --> 00:14:07,433
Let me help you.
253
00:14:07,434 --> 00:14:08,993
You'll take us in?
254
00:14:08,994 --> 00:14:10,553
Oh, no, I can't stand cats.
255
00:14:10,554 --> 00:14:12,593
I've got a mate on me dinner round,
256
00:14:12,594 --> 00:14:14,953
might be able
to give you a few pointers.
257
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:16,153
Give you a shout later.
258
00:14:16,154 --> 00:14:18,793
Really?
259
00:14:18,794 --> 00:14:22,353
Maybe they've not been taken,
maybe you've just misplaced them.
260
00:14:22,354 --> 00:14:24,073
How d'you misplace your knickers?!
261
00:14:24,074 --> 00:14:26,753
I'm always losing mine.
Stopped wearing them now.
262
00:14:26,754 --> 00:14:29,033
Anything can happen
after too many vodkas.
263
00:14:29,034 --> 00:14:31,113
Not been that pissed
for a long time.
264
00:14:31,114 --> 00:14:32,553
Or got lucky!
265
00:14:32,554 --> 00:14:34,353
Still in thewashing machine, maybe?
266
00:14:34,354 --> 00:14:35,953
Probably just someone
having a laugh.
267
00:14:35,954 --> 00:14:38,193
Just what we thought
in the summer of '74.
268
00:14:38,194 --> 00:14:41,513
Lingerie flying off lines
all round the estate.
269
00:14:41,514 --> 00:14:43,793
Complained, but the police
did nothing.
270
00:14:43,794 --> 00:14:47,393
In me teens, I went out with a girl
we used to call Yo-Yo Knickers.
271
00:14:47,394 --> 00:14:49,033
Used them as ankle warmers.
272
00:14:49,034 --> 00:14:51,833
But one woman was singled out.
273
00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:54,793
Knicker nicker was obsessed.
Killed her in the end.
274
00:14:54,794 --> 00:14:55,873
Me mum told me about that.
275
00:14:55,874 --> 00:14:59,073
Kept her body in the freezer.
Used to take her out now and then,
276
00:14:59,074 --> 00:15:01,553
defrosted her for a bit of
how's-your-father.
277
00:15:02,754 --> 00:15:05,233
They found the body when
his house was broke into.
278
00:15:05,234 --> 00:15:07,833
Burglar found him in bed with
a corpse and called the filth.
279
00:15:07,834 --> 00:15:11,833
Maybe he's back!
280
00:15:12,634 --> 00:15:14,953
Something I should have told you,
Micky.
281
00:15:14,954 --> 00:15:17,113
Leave any prejudice
at the front door,
282
00:15:17,114 --> 00:15:19,393
cos he's got full-blown HGV.
283
00:15:19,394 --> 00:15:21,793
It's HI...
284
00:15:21,794 --> 00:15:24,873
Lulu!
285
00:15:24,874 --> 00:15:26,873
Wilkommen!
286
00:15:26,874 --> 00:15:30,873
There is nothing to fear.
No judgement here.
287
00:15:32,834 --> 00:15:34,673
I know there'll be pain.
288
00:15:34,674 --> 00:15:38,313
And I know it'll only get worse.
I can cope with all of that.
289
00:15:38,314 --> 00:15:39,833
I think.
290
00:15:39,834 --> 00:15:42,233
I just need... a bit of...
291
00:15:42,234 --> 00:15:43,633
Support?
292
00:15:43,634 --> 00:15:46,153
I know. Come in.
293
00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:50,153
Mind the yucca!
294
00:15:51,314 --> 00:15:54,033
Feel no shame.
295
00:15:54,034 --> 00:15:55,433
I don't.
296
00:15:55,434 --> 00:15:56,473
Good.
297
00:15:56,474 --> 00:15:59,833
Stay positive. Pun intended!
298
00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:02,793
Spam, peas and mash.
Liquidised, as requested.
299
00:16:02,794 --> 00:16:04,313
Oh, thank you very much. >
300
00:16:04,314 --> 00:16:07,393
I can't put anything solid
in me mouth without gagging now.
301
00:16:07,394 --> 00:16:08,833
Oh, the irony!
302
00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:12,393
I'll bow out here.
Be gentle, he's quite fragile.
303
00:16:12,394 --> 00:16:16,393
Kid gloves.
304
00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:25,513
Be a good idea if we closed up
for the night, get this finished.
305
00:16:31,394 --> 00:16:32,793
I don't think you're scum.
306
00:16:32,794 --> 00:16:34,393
I still think you're uptight.
307
00:16:34,394 --> 00:16:37,113
Who else would use a word
like uptight, you hippy?
308
00:16:37,114 --> 00:16:37,753
I'm just worried about Ches.
309
00:16:37,754 --> 00:16:40,633
Ches could land in a barrel of shite
and come out shining.
310
00:16:40,634 --> 00:16:42,833
Third time
Grandad's bailed him out.
311
00:16:42,834 --> 00:16:45,793
Well, not him exactly,
but his family.
312
00:16:45,794 --> 00:16:48,153
First his dad, then mum, now him.
313
00:16:48,154 --> 00:16:52,153
Better do right by him, then.
314
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:56,073
My dad left when I was nine.
315
00:16:56,074 --> 00:16:59,553
Went to Pakistan to arrange a
business deal and never came back.
316
00:16:59,554 --> 00:17:00,993
Yeah, Ches told me.
317
00:17:00,994 --> 00:17:04,473
It was a car crash, wasn't it?
318
00:17:04,474 --> 00:17:07,753
He ran off with his cousin.
319
00:17:07,754 --> 00:17:11,753
He left my mum
with four kids under 10.
320
00:17:12,074 --> 00:17:15,553
No-one else knows that. Secret.
321
00:17:15,554 --> 00:17:19,553
What are you telling me for?
322
00:17:21,834 --> 00:17:23,193
Coffee?
323
00:17:23,194 --> 00:17:27,193
One sugar.
324
00:17:28,474 --> 00:17:32,473
Don't tell Ches.
325
00:17:35,794 --> 00:17:38,233
BELL RINGS
326
00:17:38,234 --> 00:17:39,673
What time d'you call this?!
327
00:17:39,674 --> 00:17:41,393
Time for you to go home.
328
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:44,753
What, at 11.20?! What is this,
fucking Prohibition?
329
00:17:44,754 --> 00:17:48,033
Is Eliot Ness back in town?
You know, the Untouchables...
330
00:17:48,034 --> 00:17:49,273
Sorry, no offence, mate.
331
00:17:49,274 --> 00:17:53,273
Girls are reclaiming the night.
Nutter on the loose, they're sending a clear message...
332
00:17:53,314 --> 00:17:54,913
they will not be intimidated.
333
00:17:54,914 --> 00:17:57,833
He fucking will be
if he claps eyes on that lot!
334
00:17:57,834 --> 00:17:59,393
Look, if you're scared of him...
335
00:17:59,394 --> 00:18:02,193
Are we shite scared of him!
336
00:18:02,194 --> 00:18:05,473
Then why are you allowing
said pervert
337
00:18:05,474 --> 00:18:09,353
to send you home
earlier than anticipated?
338
00:18:09,354 --> 00:18:12,073
'Ey! We're not going home early
cos we're scared.
339
00:18:12,074 --> 00:18:16,073
We're going home to show him we're
not intimidated by his behaviour.
340
00:18:17,754 --> 00:18:21,393
So, what, is that some sort of
reverse psychology or summat?
341
00:18:21,394 --> 00:18:22,913
All I know is, I get an early night.
342
00:18:22,914 --> 00:18:26,873
Oh, stay, come on!
343
00:18:26,874 --> 00:18:30,873
Who in their fucking right mind's
gonna sexually assault any of you?
344
00:18:33,874 --> 00:18:35,473
What?
345
00:18:35,474 --> 00:18:38,073
I thought we were closed.
346
00:18:38,074 --> 00:18:39,033
You OK?
347
00:18:39,034 --> 00:18:40,553
We're reclaiming the night.
348
00:18:40,554 --> 00:18:41,233
Who from?
349
00:18:41,234 --> 00:18:42,913
From whoever it was that took it!
350
00:18:42,914 --> 00:18:45,153
There's a thief out there
351
00:18:45,154 --> 00:18:49,153
stealing Mimi's undergarments
to aid his onanism.
352
00:18:51,274 --> 00:18:52,793
What, and he's out there now?
353
00:18:52,794 --> 00:18:56,273
God help him is he is.
Imagine that poor woman
354
00:18:56,274 --> 00:18:58,433
and the kids she left behind.
355
00:19:00,074 --> 00:19:03,033
..And she's not coming back.
356
00:19:03,034 --> 00:19:07,033
Give us two pints of semi-skimmed,
then we'll get off.
357
00:19:09,634 --> 00:19:11,113
88p, please, Mimi.
358
00:19:11,114 --> 00:19:12,393
On me slate.
359
00:19:12,394 --> 00:19:16,073
Ches has left strict instructions -
no slates from now on.
360
00:19:16,074 --> 00:19:20,073
She's like royalty,
doesn't carry cash.
361
00:19:24,594 --> 00:19:25,873
I'll get you a cab.
362
00:19:25,874 --> 00:19:27,033
What for?
363
00:19:27,034 --> 00:19:28,153
You heard, there's some nutter
out there.
364
00:19:28,154 --> 00:19:29,433
I'll stay here.
365
00:19:29,434 --> 00:19:30,193
You can't.
366
00:19:30,194 --> 00:19:34,193
Says who?
367
00:19:36,274 --> 00:19:39,593
Me mam says she knew
from when I was an infant.
368
00:19:39,594 --> 00:19:40,553
But how could she...
369
00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:43,553
According to her,
my first word was "cock".
370
00:19:43,554 --> 00:19:46,993
It was rejection from there on in.
371
00:19:46,994 --> 00:19:50,793
From those that should have cared
for me the most.
372
00:19:50,794 --> 00:19:53,313
I imagine my story's very similar
to yours.
373
00:19:53,314 --> 00:19:54,633
What d'you mean?
374
00:19:54,634 --> 00:19:56,393
There's no need to be coy.
375
00:19:56,394 --> 00:19:57,993
Nothing wrong with my family!
376
00:19:57,994 --> 00:20:00,833
Yeah, but they did kick you out
as soon as they found out
377
00:20:00,834 --> 00:20:04,073
about your... condition,
didn't they?
378
00:20:04,074 --> 00:20:05,673
My condition?
379
00:20:05,674 --> 00:20:07,393
Oh, denial.
380
00:20:07,394 --> 00:20:10,833
Your prognosis is much better
than mine,
381
00:20:10,834 --> 00:20:13,033
but it's still a lot to take on,
in't it?
382
00:20:13,034 --> 00:20:16,193
W-What exactly did Lillian tell you?
383
00:20:16,194 --> 00:20:20,193
Me mind was too awash with Lebanon's
finest at the time, but I know
384
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:23,193
you need me.
385
00:20:23,194 --> 00:20:26,913
We are cut from the same cloth,
you and me, Micky.
386
00:20:26,914 --> 00:20:28,273
Well, I don't think we...
387
00:20:28,274 --> 00:20:32,273
Yeah, separate us, but our stories
are heart-breakingly similar.
388
00:20:33,514 --> 00:20:37,193
Look, er... I think you've got
the wrong end of the stick, Lulu.
389
00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:41,193
There's no need to explain.
I know everything I need to know,
390
00:20:42,474 --> 00:20:45,233
and I know that I need you to know
391
00:20:45,234 --> 00:20:48,313
that as long as there is breath
in my body,
392
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:51,873
there is room for you here.
393
00:20:51,874 --> 00:20:55,873
And there's room for you here.
394
00:20:56,754 --> 00:20:58,033
There is a price, however.
395
00:20:58,034 --> 00:21:00,433
I thought there might be!
396
00:21:00,434 --> 00:21:04,433
A big stiff one inside me
before I nod off.
397
00:21:04,674 --> 00:21:06,913
Dubonnet. Double.
398
00:21:06,914 --> 00:21:10,913
(HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
399
00:21:13,794 --> 00:21:17,793
RUMBLING THUD
400
00:21:33,634 --> 00:21:35,073
(HE GASPS)
401
00:21:35,074 --> 00:21:36,993
I need a once-over from a doctor.
402
00:21:36,994 --> 00:21:38,593
Iama doctor.
403
00:21:38,594 --> 00:21:42,593
Not yet you're not! I think I bust
my wrist when I fell.
404
00:21:44,514 --> 00:21:45,553
Can you move your fingers?
405
00:21:45,554 --> 00:21:46,753
(HE WINCES)
406
00:21:46,754 --> 00:21:47,833
Nothing broken.
407
00:21:47,834 --> 00:21:50,753
How am I gonna drive for Jamie
tomorrow? You'll have to.
408
00:21:50,754 --> 00:21:52,913
Like I've got nothing better to do!
409
00:21:52,914 --> 00:21:56,913
If you don't cover me,
I'm out of a job.
410
00:21:58,554 --> 00:21:59,873
Aagh!
411
00:21:59,874 --> 00:22:00,953
Aah, shit!
412
00:22:00,954 --> 00:22:02,273
No way, Carl!
413
00:22:02,274 --> 00:22:02,833
What?
414
00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:03,953
Coming over all damaged.
415
00:22:03,954 --> 00:22:05,313
You twatted me with a bat!
416
00:22:05,314 --> 00:22:07,313
Trying to kiss me. Cheap.
417
00:22:07,314 --> 00:22:11,313
You could not be more wrong.
I felt a bit... woozy.
418
00:22:11,994 --> 00:22:15,993
Well, if you still feel "woozy"
in the morning, then get to A&E!
419
00:22:22,434 --> 00:22:25,273
I'm sorry about this, Lulu.
There's been an accident.
420
00:22:25,274 --> 00:22:27,353
Oh, yer all right, Micky.
421
00:22:27,354 --> 00:22:30,673
If it weren't for these panty pads,
I'd be leaving a trail meself.
422
00:22:30,674 --> 00:22:31,473
This isn't me!
423
00:22:31,474 --> 00:22:33,153
I know, there's much more to you
424
00:22:33,154 --> 00:22:35,553
than just a body
that's failing its function.
425
00:22:35,554 --> 00:22:37,793
I need to explain meself.
426
00:22:37,794 --> 00:22:39,873
This isn't even human.
427
00:22:39,874 --> 00:22:41,793
What have they done to you?!
428
00:22:41,794 --> 00:22:45,793
You've allowed their poison,
their prejudice, to warp your mind!
429
00:22:49,314 --> 00:22:52,433
You fucking cunts!
430
00:22:52,434 --> 00:22:54,793
He is a human being!
431
00:22:54,794 --> 00:22:57,953
If you prick him - which I don't
advise, by the way...
432
00:22:57,954 --> 00:23:01,953
does he not bleed?
433
00:23:04,154 --> 00:23:06,753
You poor, poor boy.
434
00:23:06,754 --> 00:23:09,233
Look, I'm all right, honest!
435
00:23:09,234 --> 00:23:11,673
Fuck 'em. Fuck their prejudice.
436
00:23:11,674 --> 00:23:13,873
Fuck their world.
437
00:23:13,874 --> 00:23:15,593
It's not that bad out here.
438
00:23:15,594 --> 00:23:17,593
15 years ago I got the news,
439
00:23:17,594 --> 00:23:19,273
and I wept.
440
00:23:19,274 --> 00:23:22,273
But the closer I get,
the more it appeals.
441
00:23:22,274 --> 00:23:25,233
And when I go,
I want to be allowed to go.
442
00:23:25,234 --> 00:23:27,633
I don't want to be strapped
to some machine
443
00:23:27,634 --> 00:23:29,793
that's pumping breath
back into a body
444
00:23:29,794 --> 00:23:33,793
that's convinced it's breathed
its last. What I want...
445
00:23:34,554 --> 00:23:38,033
is "DNR" written across here.
446
00:23:38,034 --> 00:23:42,033
Go on. DNR.
447
00:23:42,594 --> 00:23:44,553
Do...
448
00:23:44,554 --> 00:23:46,593
Not...
449
00:23:46,594 --> 00:23:50,593
Resuscitate.
450
00:24:01,994 --> 00:24:03,953
I dictated how I lived my life,
451
00:24:03,954 --> 00:24:07,953
I'll do the same with me death.
You'll make sure, will you, Micky?
452
00:24:09,194 --> 00:24:10,993
Course I will.
453
00:24:10,994 --> 00:24:14,993
When I slip into unconsciousness,
let me go.
454
00:24:16,194 --> 00:24:18,276
I will.
455
00:24:20,074 --> 00:24:21,317
I will.
456
00:24:26,833 --> 00:24:27,872
Not dead, then?
457
00:24:27,873 --> 00:24:30,832
Sorry to disappoint.
458
00:24:30,833 --> 00:24:31,792
I've already eaten.
459
00:24:31,793 --> 00:24:33,832
Did you make your own breakfast?
460
00:24:33,833 --> 00:24:37,832
A man who can cook for himself.
There is hope for the world yet.
461
00:24:38,273 --> 00:24:40,512
New job, early start.
462
00:24:40,513 --> 00:24:42,792
He's covering for Carl
while Carl covers for Chesney.
463
00:24:42,793 --> 00:24:45,512
Oh. A working man now?
464
00:24:45,513 --> 00:24:49,512
A little good luck present
for the man bringing the cash in.
465
00:24:51,433 --> 00:24:55,432
Better get off.
Don't want to be late.
466
00:25:01,313 --> 00:25:03,472
Fine, thanks for asking.
467
00:25:03,473 --> 00:25:04,752
I said I'm sorry.
468
00:25:04,753 --> 00:25:08,752
Your phone's off.
I told you to keep it on.
469
00:25:08,833 --> 00:25:10,672
I need you to drop that car later.
470
00:25:10,673 --> 00:25:14,272
Aidan's getting it ready.
Should be done around one-ish. Here's the address.
471
00:25:14,273 --> 00:25:17,752
The car you need to pick up
is at the same address, OK?
472
00:25:17,753 --> 00:25:21,752
Cool.
473
00:25:25,353 --> 00:25:28,632
Say yeah
and I'll agree to drop the charges.
474
00:25:28,633 --> 00:25:31,232
To what? And what charges?
475
00:25:31,233 --> 00:25:35,232
Doing me driving and ABH.
You know, twatting me head, nearly busting me hand.
476
00:25:35,233 --> 00:25:37,952
Joking aside, I'll be out
of a job if that car's not dropped.
477
00:25:37,953 --> 00:25:39,312
Well, it's no good looking at me.
478
00:25:39,313 --> 00:25:42,232
You can't drive?
479
00:25:42,233 --> 00:25:46,232
Shit.
480
00:25:49,233 --> 00:25:52,072
Seen this? Done a crackin' job.
481
00:25:52,073 --> 00:25:54,392
I hope he'll be rewarded
for his efforts.
482
00:25:54,393 --> 00:25:55,512
Yeah, yeah.
483
00:25:55,513 --> 00:25:59,032
If you're still in the mood, Aidan,
the pub could do with a going over.
484
00:25:59,033 --> 00:26:01,672
Let me get a photo. Bend down
like you're cleaning the wheels.
485
00:26:01,673 --> 00:26:03,632
I feel stupid.
486
00:26:03,633 --> 00:26:07,632
You look stupid.
487
00:26:07,673 --> 00:26:11,632
I've been worried sick that some
nutter's been tracking me down.
488
00:26:11,633 --> 00:26:15,632
And all along it was him!
489
00:26:16,073 --> 00:26:19,072
How dare you hit him?
490
00:26:19,073 --> 00:26:23,072
Oh, stop it!
Just fuckin' stop it now!
491
00:26:25,153 --> 00:26:26,072
Mum! Fuckin' hell!
492
00:26:26,073 --> 00:26:29,712
Spare the rod, spoil the child!
493
00:26:29,713 --> 00:26:31,392
Is that what Cilla has
to look forward to, is it?
494
00:26:31,393 --> 00:26:33,592
Fuckin' hell, Libby!
495
00:26:33,593 --> 00:26:37,512
I'm not going to smack her, am I,
soft shite? She's a girl!
496
00:26:37,513 --> 00:26:38,832
Oh, so it's just the lads, is it?
497
00:26:38,833 --> 00:26:42,832
No wonder they turned out
as well as they have. Oh!
498
00:26:44,913 --> 00:26:48,912
I know the reality of bringing
lads up. And if you're not firm
499
00:26:49,513 --> 00:26:53,512
with them, tough with them,
then you fuck them up for life!
500
00:26:55,273 --> 00:26:59,272
Don't ask.
501
00:27:00,313 --> 00:27:03,752
God. Urgh! Sweet Jesus!
502
00:27:03,753 --> 00:27:05,712
It's too late now, innit?
503
00:27:05,713 --> 00:27:08,952
It's too late now.
504
00:27:08,953 --> 00:27:12,072
Fucking Spanish onions
for your cat medicine.
505
00:27:12,073 --> 00:27:16,072
To late take them out
now, innit, Dusty?
506
00:27:16,633 --> 00:27:18,832
She had an accident.
507
00:27:18,833 --> 00:27:21,552
I feel like I've sprung
a leak meself sometimes.
508
00:27:21,553 --> 00:27:25,552
Maybe later. Would you give that
a stir while I get rid of this?
509
00:27:32,673 --> 00:27:36,672
You know, before you came,
the very day before you came,
510
00:27:37,113 --> 00:27:39,592
I felt like
I was coming to the end.
511
00:27:39,593 --> 00:27:43,032
I thought, "What the fuck
have you got to live for?
512
00:27:43,033 --> 00:27:45,152
"Who the fuck?"
513
00:27:45,153 --> 00:27:49,152
I realised I had nothing at all,
nothing except liquefied Pot Noodles
514
00:27:49,433 --> 00:27:51,552
and power ballads.
515
00:27:51,553 --> 00:27:54,792
I found myself praying to God
516
00:27:54,793 --> 00:27:57,872
for a sign. The very next day,
517
00:27:57,873 --> 00:28:00,432
in you rolled, looking for advice.
518
00:28:00,433 --> 00:28:02,392
I'm a lucky man.
519
00:28:02,393 --> 00:28:05,472
Thank you, God.
520
00:28:05,473 --> 00:28:07,672
Thank you, Micky.
521
00:28:07,673 --> 00:28:10,592
Listen, I'm going to put
the feelers out for a flat,
522
00:28:10,593 --> 00:28:12,512
so I won't be under your feet
for too long.
523
00:28:12,513 --> 00:28:16,472
You being here, sweet boy,
is not problem.
524
00:28:16,473 --> 00:28:20,472
No problem at all.
525
00:28:20,833 --> 00:28:24,832
Divine. Homemade food and
good company, what could be better?
526
00:28:26,473 --> 00:28:28,872
CAT MEOWS
527
00:28:28,873 --> 00:28:31,272
Phone an ambulance!
528
00:28:31,273 --> 00:28:35,272
She's having a fit.
Phone an ambulance!
529
00:28:35,313 --> 00:28:37,472
Where we off to, then?
530
00:28:37,473 --> 00:28:39,632
I had the address here.
Jamie gave it me before.
531
00:28:39,633 --> 00:28:41,552
Just give him a shout.
532
00:28:41,553 --> 00:28:44,432
And say what? "That address you
gave me - dickhead here's lost it."
533
00:28:44,433 --> 00:28:48,432
Sat-nav. With any luck,
the home button should do it.
534
00:28:48,793 --> 00:28:50,872
'In 500 metres, turn left.'
535
00:28:50,873 --> 00:28:52,992
Not as daft as you look, are you?
536
00:28:52,993 --> 00:28:56,992
No. But you are.
537
00:29:02,073 --> 00:29:04,712
'You have reached your destination.'
538
00:29:04,713 --> 00:29:06,032
So where's this car
you're picking up, then?
539
00:29:06,033 --> 00:29:08,152
Could be parked up anywhere.
540
00:29:08,153 --> 00:29:10,152
Could be that one.
541
00:29:10,153 --> 00:29:12,592
Or that one.
542
00:29:12,593 --> 00:29:16,592
Oh? Another satisfied customer.
543
00:29:19,113 --> 00:29:23,112
I only reported it missing this
morning. About an hour or so ago.
544
00:29:23,473 --> 00:29:25,592
So where did you find it?
545
00:29:25,593 --> 00:29:27,192
Can you fetch me some ID?
546
00:29:27,193 --> 00:29:31,192
Like car registration documents,
please? I'll get the paperwork.
547
00:29:34,353 --> 00:29:36,112
Fuck's sake, get back in. Come on!
548
00:29:36,113 --> 00:29:37,032
What?
549
00:29:37,033 --> 00:29:41,032
The car's robbed.
This is where it's robbed from.
550
00:29:50,353 --> 00:29:52,832
Near 200 quid to the fuckin' vet,
551
00:29:52,833 --> 00:29:56,152
only to be told the reason she
was having difficulty breathing
552
00:29:56,153 --> 00:29:58,632
was because she had more
marijuana in her system
553
00:29:58,633 --> 00:30:02,392
than a Rastafari with a bad habit,
and her collar was too tight.
554
00:30:02,393 --> 00:30:03,752
Sorry.
555
00:30:03,753 --> 00:30:06,192
I appreciate your concern
for a creature, Micky,
556
00:30:06,193 --> 00:30:08,872
but for fuck's sake,
she's a twatting cat!
557
00:30:08,873 --> 00:30:10,512
It's not exactly the point.
558
00:30:10,513 --> 00:30:13,352
It is when you're talking to someone
who's looking death in the face!
559
00:30:13,353 --> 00:30:17,352
Who puts their head on the pillow, never knowing
whether they're going to wake up again!
560
00:30:17,673 --> 00:30:19,672
Keep you're voice down!
You're upsetting Dusty.
561
00:30:19,673 --> 00:30:23,152
Fuck Dusty! Fuck her! What about me?
562
00:30:23,153 --> 00:30:25,392
And why is it always about
you with people like you?
563
00:30:25,393 --> 00:30:27,232
God, every person in my life,
564
00:30:27,233 --> 00:30:31,232
it's, "Me, me, me, me, me." And you
know what, Lulu? I've had enough.
565
00:30:31,513 --> 00:30:32,792
Where are you going?
566
00:30:32,793 --> 00:30:36,792
It's not right me being here, and I know
that you need someone, but it ain't me.
567
00:30:36,913 --> 00:30:37,992
Don't leave.
568
00:30:37,993 --> 00:30:41,552
You've been really kind to me, Lulu,
and while I've been here
569
00:30:41,553 --> 00:30:44,192
I've learned
a really valuable lesson,
570
00:30:44,193 --> 00:30:46,392
but in the end it's just me.
571
00:30:46,393 --> 00:30:48,752
I'm on me own.
572
00:30:48,753 --> 00:30:52,192
The doctor's given me one month!
I don't want to die alone!
573
00:30:52,193 --> 00:30:56,192
We all die alone. I'll tell Lillian.
I'll get in touch with a support group.
574
00:30:56,553 --> 00:30:59,312
Don't leave me,
you hard-hearted bastard!
575
00:30:59,313 --> 00:31:01,272
Get off!
576
00:31:01,273 --> 00:31:03,232
I know your suffering.
577
00:31:03,233 --> 00:31:07,232
I understand better than any mother,
any brother, any lover.
578
00:31:08,513 --> 00:31:11,352
Look, it's not me, OK?
579
00:31:11,353 --> 00:31:15,232
I didn't need to lie to you
about the AIDS thing, but...
580
00:31:15,233 --> 00:31:19,232
It's Dusty who's got it.
581
00:31:22,313 --> 00:31:26,312
I mentioned it to Lillian and she said
that you might be able to help us.
582
00:31:26,433 --> 00:31:28,472
You lied.
583
00:31:28,473 --> 00:31:31,432
I tried to tell you,
but you wouldn't listen
584
00:31:31,433 --> 00:31:34,432
and then it just went on
too far and...
585
00:31:34,433 --> 00:31:36,592
Picking over my life,
586
00:31:36,593 --> 00:31:40,592
my disease, to help that.
587
00:31:40,633 --> 00:31:43,352
MEOW!
588
00:31:43,353 --> 00:31:45,072
Get out!
589
00:31:45,073 --> 00:31:47,072
You deserve everything
that's coming to you!
590
00:31:47,073 --> 00:31:48,232
Get out!
591
00:31:48,233 --> 00:31:52,232
Drop dead, you twisted old fruit!
592
00:31:54,673 --> 00:31:57,072
Fuck. Shit.
593
00:31:57,073 --> 00:31:59,232
Oh, fuck! Shit!
594
00:31:59,233 --> 00:32:01,632
Phone.
595
00:32:01,633 --> 00:32:05,632
Fuck! Oh, shit. Fuck! Help! Help.
596
00:32:11,273 --> 00:32:15,272
Thanks very much.
597
00:32:19,633 --> 00:32:20,672
Cunt.
598
00:32:20,673 --> 00:32:21,952
I couldn't just let you die.
599
00:32:21,953 --> 00:32:22,632
Why?
600
00:32:22,633 --> 00:32:24,632
I wouldn't be able
to live with myself.
601
00:32:24,633 --> 00:32:28,632
(COUGHS)
602
00:32:31,913 --> 00:32:35,912
You might have fucked up your own
life, but you're not fucking up mine.
603
00:32:38,633 --> 00:32:40,872
The medic said
you'd not been taking your meds.
604
00:32:40,873 --> 00:32:42,152
What's the use?
605
00:32:42,153 --> 00:32:45,512
Right. Here's the deal.
I stick around as long as you're still breathing
606
00:32:45,513 --> 00:32:49,072
on the understanding that
you just stop your fucking moaning.
607
00:32:49,073 --> 00:32:50,392
I don't need it.
608
00:32:50,393 --> 00:32:51,432
You're staying?
609
00:32:51,433 --> 00:32:52,992
If you kick off again, I'm gone.
610
00:32:52,993 --> 00:32:55,312
You can drown in your own piss,
for all I care. You got that?
611
00:32:55,313 --> 00:32:56,432
Loud and clear.
612
00:32:56,433 --> 00:32:58,032
There's going to be a few changes.
613
00:32:58,033 --> 00:33:01,952
I'm going to decorate.
Something bright and welcoming.
614
00:33:01,953 --> 00:33:05,872
We could re-carpet, new couch,
some drapes.
615
00:33:05,873 --> 00:33:07,392
That's curtains.
616
00:33:07,393 --> 00:33:09,432
Cost a bit.
617
00:33:09,433 --> 00:33:10,792
I've got a few bob stashed.
618
00:33:10,793 --> 00:33:12,992
I can dip into me funeral fund.
619
00:33:12,993 --> 00:33:16,072
And there's a quiz every Sunday
at the Seaman's Arms. We're going.
620
00:33:16,073 --> 00:33:16,912
I don't think...
621
00:33:16,913 --> 00:33:19,952
I don't think...
When was the last time you partied?
622
00:33:19,953 --> 00:33:21,472
Lady Di's funeral.
623
00:33:21,473 --> 00:33:23,712
I threw some flowers in the canal,
624
00:33:23,713 --> 00:33:27,712
got trollied on GHB, came home,
locked the door and that was it.
625
00:33:27,713 --> 00:33:30,552
So it's the quiz for starters,
then we can hit a few clubs.
626
00:33:30,553 --> 00:33:32,512
There's plenty of '80s nights
and that,
627
00:33:32,513 --> 00:33:34,472
so you'll be able
to throw a few shapes.
628
00:33:34,473 --> 00:33:37,792
There's a big world out there, Lulu.
A fucking...
629
00:33:37,793 --> 00:33:40,272
A big world.
630
00:33:40,273 --> 00:33:44,272
This calls for a celebration.
631
00:33:45,913 --> 00:33:49,112
No, no, no, no, no.
Let's do it properly.
632
00:33:49,113 --> 00:33:53,112
Bubbly.
633
00:34:04,033 --> 00:34:05,952
WOLF WHISTLING
634
00:34:05,953 --> 00:34:09,952
Oi, stop looking at me arse!
635
00:34:19,673 --> 00:34:23,672
MUSIC
636
00:34:32,673 --> 00:34:36,672
SIREN WAILS
637
00:34:43,633 --> 00:34:46,592
Shit.
638
00:34:46,593 --> 00:34:49,952
In about ten seconds I want you
to slam on, get out and run.
639
00:34:49,953 --> 00:34:52,832
Dump your jacket just in case
they get a description out.
640
00:34:52,833 --> 00:34:53,992
What about you?
641
00:34:53,993 --> 00:34:57,552
I'll get in the driving seat. Hopefully they'll
follow me and you'll be able to get away.
642
00:34:57,553 --> 00:34:59,552
But your hand!
643
00:34:59,553 --> 00:35:01,712
I was lying.
I just wanted you with me.
644
00:35:01,713 --> 00:35:03,272
I'll ditch the car
as soon as I can.
645
00:35:03,273 --> 00:35:04,752
And if you don't get the chance?
646
00:35:04,753 --> 00:35:08,752
Break now! Now!
647
00:35:24,713 --> 00:35:28,712
Jacket!
648
00:35:47,553 --> 00:35:50,472
I'm sorry. If I'd known the car was
robbed, I would've never put you
649
00:35:50,473 --> 00:35:52,152
in that position, I swear to God.
650
00:35:52,153 --> 00:35:56,152
I swear to God.
651
00:36:29,033 --> 00:36:32,339
Right. It's nicely chilled.
652
00:36:32,340 --> 00:36:35,939
I got some pate and a few baps.
Some nuts and crisps.
653
00:36:35,940 --> 00:36:38,739
Thought we could have
a bit of a do, you know.
654
00:36:38,740 --> 00:36:40,939
Not the cheap shit, either.
655
00:36:40,940 --> 00:36:44,939
Only the best for us.
656
00:36:45,980 --> 00:36:49,979
I can teach you and you can teach me
and face it all together.
657
00:36:50,140 --> 00:36:54,139
Get each other through. Just me
and you against the world, eh, Lulu?
658
00:36:58,060 --> 00:37:02,059
No!
659
00:37:10,647 --> 00:37:12,686
There you go. Thanks.
660
00:37:12,687 --> 00:37:16,686
Thanks.
661
00:37:27,407 --> 00:37:31,206
You didn't know he was Beirut?
662
00:37:31,207 --> 00:37:32,486
Fruit - queer.
663
00:37:32,487 --> 00:37:34,726
Dunno, don't think so.
664
00:37:34,727 --> 00:37:38,726
One of God's innocents, aren't you?
665
00:37:38,847 --> 00:37:40,446
He was a gay.
666
00:37:40,447 --> 00:37:44,446
No(!)
667
00:37:44,607 --> 00:37:47,286
I used to work in a bar
in the Gay Village,
668
00:37:47,287 --> 00:37:49,526
years before it was the Gay Village.
669
00:37:49,527 --> 00:37:51,486
The laughs we used to have.
670
00:37:51,487 --> 00:37:55,126
Such good people to be with.
The life and soul of the party.
671
00:37:55,127 --> 00:37:56,886
But then when the pubs shut,
672
00:37:56,887 --> 00:37:58,566
and the clubs and the bars,
673
00:37:58,567 --> 00:38:02,566
they go home alone
and cry themselves to sleep.
674
00:38:05,647 --> 00:38:08,686
So it's down to you to organise
his send-off.
675
00:38:08,687 --> 00:38:11,726
Will you help us?
I don't know where to start.
676
00:38:11,727 --> 00:38:13,406
He gave me his card and PIN number.
677
00:38:13,407 --> 00:38:17,406
He took to you, didn't he?
678
00:38:20,487 --> 00:38:22,526
He didn't...
679
00:38:22,527 --> 00:38:25,806
I mean, he didn't...you know...
680
00:38:25,807 --> 00:38:29,046
..charge you rent?
681
00:38:29,047 --> 00:38:31,206
Make you pay in kind?
682
00:38:31,207 --> 00:38:33,166
Jesus! Did he try it on with you?
683
00:38:33,167 --> 00:38:34,606
He's...just lonely.
684
00:38:34,607 --> 00:38:37,286
He just wanted a bit of company.
685
00:38:37,287 --> 00:38:39,926
What a way to live, eh?
686
00:38:39,927 --> 00:38:42,446
It doesn't have to be like this,
though, does it?
687
00:38:42,447 --> 00:38:46,446
I mean, if his family would have
just accepted him for what he was.
688
00:38:46,927 --> 00:38:50,926
His family rejected him?
689
00:38:51,127 --> 00:38:53,126
Bastards!
690
00:38:53,127 --> 00:38:54,486
No mates?
691
00:38:54,487 --> 00:38:56,686
Long gone.
692
00:38:56,687 --> 00:39:00,686
Address book. We should see if we can
trace any of his family.
693
00:39:00,727 --> 00:39:04,006
Why? Fuckers never gave a shit
when he was around.
694
00:39:04,007 --> 00:39:08,006
Why would they be arsed
when he's not?
695
00:39:23,167 --> 00:39:26,046
I didn't know Philip for long...
696
00:39:26,047 --> 00:39:28,286
Lulu...
697
00:39:28,287 --> 00:39:30,966
but I did know the pain he was in.
698
00:39:30,967 --> 00:39:34,646
Not because of his illness
particularly,
699
00:39:34,647 --> 00:39:36,526
but from the scars he carried
700
00:39:36,527 --> 00:39:40,526
from years of rejection
by those he held dear...
701
00:39:40,727 --> 00:39:42,246
..those he loved,
702
00:39:42,247 --> 00:39:46,246
who couldn't love him back because
of who he was.
703
00:39:47,327 --> 00:39:48,606
What he was.
704
00:39:48,607 --> 00:39:52,606
He knew that once he stood up
and said, "I am what I am,"
705
00:39:52,647 --> 00:39:56,006
there'd be a price to pay.
706
00:39:56,007 --> 00:40:00,006
Years of loneliness and isolation.
707
00:40:00,167 --> 00:40:04,166
His only friends, a half-witted
old woman and his doctor.
708
00:40:06,167 --> 00:40:08,206
You're wrong.
709
00:40:08,207 --> 00:40:12,206
He had the courage to live his life
his way.
710
00:40:13,167 --> 00:40:15,766
To die his way.
711
00:40:15,767 --> 00:40:18,726
A life with no compromise,
712
00:40:18,727 --> 00:40:21,366
with no regard for the scorn
and disappointment
713
00:40:21,367 --> 00:40:23,446
heaped on him by those nearest.
714
00:40:23,447 --> 00:40:25,886
Those who should have loved him...
715
00:40:25,887 --> 00:40:29,566
no matter what.
716
00:40:29,567 --> 00:40:30,806
What do you mean by that?
717
00:40:30,807 --> 00:40:32,566
You know what I'm talking about.
718
00:40:32,567 --> 00:40:36,326
Are you insinuating that I rejected
my own brother because he were gay?
719
00:40:36,327 --> 00:40:38,726
You're the one who couldn't
bear to face him for years.
720
00:40:38,727 --> 00:40:42,246
I had him round Christmas,
New Year, Easter, birthdays.
721
00:40:42,247 --> 00:40:44,046
Guilt getting to you, is it?
722
00:40:44,047 --> 00:40:45,846
You cheeky fucker.
723
00:40:45,847 --> 00:40:47,246
Get off him!
724
00:40:47,247 --> 00:40:51,246
Get off him!
725
00:40:56,407 --> 00:41:00,406
MUSIC STARTS
726
00:41:21,087 --> 00:41:23,286
A couple of times when
I were younger,
727
00:41:23,287 --> 00:41:25,606
I tried to broach the subject.
728
00:41:25,607 --> 00:41:29,486
But he'd have none of it.
729
00:41:29,487 --> 00:41:32,326
Not the story he told me.
730
00:41:32,327 --> 00:41:33,766
Not the story he told anyone.
731
00:41:33,767 --> 00:41:37,446
Disappeared in 1985.
732
00:41:37,447 --> 00:41:40,686
All Mam got was a postcard
saying he were living in London.
733
00:41:40,687 --> 00:41:42,966
Not to bother trying to find him.
734
00:41:42,967 --> 00:41:46,366
Your mam never liked him anyway.
735
00:41:46,367 --> 00:41:49,526
He were the apple of her eye.
736
00:41:49,527 --> 00:41:51,726
It broke her heart when he went.
737
00:41:51,727 --> 00:41:53,246
She used to say to me,
738
00:41:53,247 --> 00:41:55,446
"How come he didn't tell me?"
739
00:41:55,447 --> 00:41:58,966
Trust me, the thought for one
second I wouldn't love him...
740
00:41:58,967 --> 00:42:00,926
He said you rejected him.
741
00:42:00,927 --> 00:42:02,326
You all did.
742
00:42:02,327 --> 00:42:03,686
When we were kids,
743
00:42:03,687 --> 00:42:07,686
Mam saying to us, "I loved you from
the moment you entered this world.
744
00:42:08,287 --> 00:42:10,046
"And I'll never stop.
745
00:42:10,047 --> 00:42:14,046
"I'll love you for all time,
eternity."
746
00:42:14,247 --> 00:42:16,766
Only one who had trouble believing
that were Philip.
747
00:42:16,767 --> 00:42:19,726
You knew?
748
00:42:19,727 --> 00:42:21,206
All the time, you knew?
749
00:42:21,207 --> 00:42:22,686
What he were.
750
00:42:22,687 --> 00:42:26,086
Who he were.
751
00:42:26,087 --> 00:42:29,966
Didn't stop me loving him any less.
752
00:42:29,967 --> 00:42:33,966
Thanks for doing what you did.
753
00:42:35,127 --> 00:42:37,246
He hadn't even suffered anything.
754
00:42:37,247 --> 00:42:39,206
He was just a big lying poof.
755
00:42:39,207 --> 00:42:41,766
He was lying to protect himself.
756
00:42:41,767 --> 00:42:42,806
You think so?
757
00:42:42,807 --> 00:42:44,486
It was himself he couldn't face.
758
00:42:44,487 --> 00:42:45,846
That's what his brother said.
759
00:42:45,847 --> 00:42:47,126
And he's right.
760
00:42:47,127 --> 00:42:48,406
How sad is that?
761
00:42:48,407 --> 00:42:51,086
You're better off saying,
aren't you, really?
762
00:42:51,087 --> 00:42:53,086
Just summon up the courage and say,
763
00:42:53,087 --> 00:42:57,086
"A life lived lying is like
a life half-lived."
764
00:43:00,087 --> 00:43:04,086
Honestyisthe best policy.
765
00:43:06,127 --> 00:43:07,766
Though I've got to admit,
766
00:43:07,767 --> 00:43:10,926
I'd fuckin' freak if it was one of
mine, do you know what I mean?
767
00:43:10,927 --> 00:43:11,966
Too right.
768
00:43:11,967 --> 00:43:13,406
I'd spend the rest of me life
769
00:43:13,407 --> 00:43:15,846
wondering what the fuck
I'd done wrong.
770
00:43:15,847 --> 00:43:19,446
I mean, is it genetic,
something they learn?
771
00:43:19,447 --> 00:43:21,726
What makes a lad like cock?
772
00:43:21,727 --> 00:43:24,486
I mean, apart from his own, like.
773
00:43:24,487 --> 00:43:25,726
And arses.
774
00:43:25,727 --> 00:43:29,726
Could never get me head round that.
775
00:43:35,167 --> 00:43:37,086
Dusty?
776
00:43:37,087 --> 00:43:38,846
Dusty!
777
00:43:38,847 --> 00:43:42,846
Dusty?
778
00:43:45,127 --> 00:43:47,686
Dusty!
779
00:43:47,687 --> 00:43:51,686
Pss, pss, pss!
780
00:43:52,927 --> 00:43:56,486
She'll be out on the prowl somewhere.
781
00:43:56,487 --> 00:43:58,966
Dusty!
782
00:43:58,967 --> 00:44:02,966
Pss, pss, pss, pss, pss.
783
00:44:04,407 --> 00:44:05,726
Where is she?
784
00:44:05,727 --> 00:44:07,806
You fuckin'...
785
00:44:07,807 --> 00:44:11,446
Fuck off with that Billy Casper
routine.
786
00:44:11,447 --> 00:44:12,486
What have you done with his cat?
787
00:44:12,487 --> 00:44:15,526
Why are you sofuckin' bothered?
It was just a cat.
788
00:44:15,527 --> 00:44:19,366
It was his cat.
789
00:44:19,367 --> 00:44:21,166
You haven't?
790
00:44:21,167 --> 00:44:23,806
Fuck's sake, Shane, you haven't?
791
00:44:23,807 --> 00:44:26,366
Haven't what?
792
00:44:26,367 --> 00:44:27,566
Haven't what?
793
00:44:27,567 --> 00:44:31,046
It was sat on Cilla's face.
What the fuck am I supposed to do?
794
00:44:31,047 --> 00:44:32,486
Leave her?
795
00:44:32,487 --> 00:44:35,726
Where is she?
796
00:44:35,727 --> 00:44:39,726
In the bin...where she belongs.
797
00:44:44,127 --> 00:44:48,126
You bastard, Shane,
you fuckin' bastard.
798
00:45:11,727 --> 00:45:13,846
'They say I got a lot of water
in my brain.
799
00:45:13,847 --> 00:45:17,646
'Got no common sense.
800
00:45:17,647 --> 00:45:19,366
'I got nobody left to believe in.
801
00:45:19,367 --> 00:45:23,366
'I used to think Freddie was singing
about me when I heard that.
802
00:45:23,687 --> 00:45:27,366
'But I know I have.
803
00:45:27,367 --> 00:45:31,366
'And I know they're out there,
just waiting for me.
804
00:45:33,847 --> 00:45:35,646
'All I have to do...
805
00:45:35,647 --> 00:45:39,286
'is find them.'
806
00:45:39,287 --> 00:45:40,206
Jenny Taylor.
807
00:45:40,207 --> 00:45:42,246
Jenny's going to be your carer.
808
00:45:42,247 --> 00:45:45,766
If you walk out that door, you won't
be allowed back. I mean it.
809
00:45:45,767 --> 00:45:46,766
Why do this?
810
00:45:46,767 --> 00:45:48,006
I need someone.
811
00:45:48,007 --> 00:45:49,526
You've got me.
812
00:45:49,527 --> 00:45:50,486
Parents, eh? Can't live with them...
813
00:45:50,487 --> 00:45:53,406
And you can't kill them!
814
00:45:53,407 --> 00:45:54,846
I can't do that. I just run things.
815
00:45:54,847 --> 00:45:58,006
Fuck off or you fuck off.
816
00:45:58,007 --> 00:46:00,086
She's drugging me.
817
00:46:00,087 --> 00:46:04,006
This rope's too tight.
818
00:46:04,007 --> 00:46:08,006
Marry me.
819
00:46:47,007 --> 00:46:49,166
Would you like me to be the cat?
820
00:46:49,167 --> 00:46:52,086
Yes, please. Don't be frightened.
821
00:46:52,087 --> 00:46:56,086
(PURRS)
822
00:46:57,087 --> 00:47:01,086
Here's some milk.
You like that, don't you?
823
00:47:01,286 --> 00:47:11,486
824
00:47:11,536 --> 00:47:16,086
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