All language subtitles for Portlandia s03e02 Take Back MTV.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,132 --> 00:00:02,699 Hey, Josh, I thought I saw you over there. 2 00:00:02,733 --> 00:00:04,767 Hey. [Chuckles] 3 00:00:04,801 --> 00:00:06,302 How are you? 4 00:00:06,336 --> 00:00:08,203 Uh, not great. I mean, I'm moving back home. 5 00:00:08,238 --> 00:00:11,501 So am I. I mean, kinda seems like we all are. 6 00:00:11,535 --> 00:00:13,498 Yeah, I was in the city for, like, six moths after I graduated college. 7 00:00:13,533 --> 00:00:15,232 There is no work. 8 00:00:15,267 --> 00:00:17,774 I kind of feel like our whole generation got screwed. 9 00:00:17,808 --> 00:00:19,676 Yeah, I don't I know what it was. The banks--? 10 00:00:19,711 --> 00:00:21,510 I know. I feel like we need to mobilize. 11 00:00:21,544 --> 00:00:23,640 Like in the '60s there was Woodstock, there was Joan baez. 12 00:00:23,674 --> 00:00:24,638 Like, people rallied around something. 13 00:00:24,673 --> 00:00:25,872 There was a protest song. 14 00:00:25,906 --> 00:00:27,272 Yeah. 15 00:00:27,307 --> 00:00:29,472 Attention, unemployed millennials. 16 00:00:29,506 --> 00:00:30,672 Hi, Bot-Dylan. 17 00:00:30,706 --> 00:00:32,073 Check out this protest anthem 18 00:00:32,107 --> 00:00:33,536 and see what you think. 19 00:00:33,571 --> 00:00:37,069 It's time for this generation to stand up 20 00:00:37,103 --> 00:00:40,272 our future's being traded on the NASDAQ-- 21 00:00:40,306 --> 00:00:41,639 What? 22 00:00:41,674 --> 00:00:45,139 Change the world one party at a time 23 00:00:45,174 --> 00:00:49,373 roll up in the club 'cause we're V.I.P. 24 00:00:49,408 --> 00:00:52,744 work that body all night 'cause it feels right to me 25 00:00:52,778 --> 00:00:54,503 Okay, you guys, you guys, stop. 26 00:00:54,537 --> 00:00:55,734 What were we doing? 27 00:00:55,769 --> 00:00:57,330 Oh, right. Something political. 28 00:00:57,364 --> 00:00:59,261 [Piano] 29 00:01:01,196 --> 00:01:04,827 We've been given a raw deal 30 00:01:04,862 --> 00:01:08,760 had to take a big step backwards 31 00:01:08,794 --> 00:01:12,550 now you're dancing electric slide 32 00:01:12,585 --> 00:01:14,111 keep sliding 33 00:01:14,145 --> 00:01:16,269 slide toward your future now 34 00:01:16,304 --> 00:01:20,039 change the world one party at a time 35 00:01:20,073 --> 00:01:24,425 mind eraser shots with a twist of lime 36 00:01:24,459 --> 00:01:25,988 Damn it. Happened again. 37 00:01:26,022 --> 00:01:29,044 Oh, guys, we cannot be doing mind eraser shots. 38 00:01:29,078 --> 00:01:30,143 This is going to do it. 39 00:01:30,178 --> 00:01:32,075 Okay, ukulele player, simple songs. 40 00:01:32,109 --> 00:01:33,374 She's great. 41 00:01:36,970 --> 00:01:40,070 So many hotties up in this piece 42 00:01:40,104 --> 00:01:42,373 You know, I'm more mad at myself than anything else. 43 00:01:42,407 --> 00:01:43,568 It's okay. I know what you mean. 44 00:01:43,602 --> 00:01:45,290 I take responsibility, too. 45 00:01:45,324 --> 00:01:46,986 We can't just reinvent the wheel. 46 00:01:47,020 --> 00:01:49,076 Maybe we just get an original group from the '60s. 47 00:01:49,111 --> 00:01:50,311 They knew what they were doing. 48 00:01:50,335 --> 00:01:51,430 We obviously don't. 49 00:01:51,465 --> 00:01:54,503 We are the flower children 50 00:01:54,537 --> 00:01:56,192 leaves, they are-- 51 00:01:56,227 --> 00:01:59,780 change the world one party at a time 52 00:02:01,406 --> 00:02:03,131 Hey, guys, look! Dance tent. 53 00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:04,561 Whoo! 54 00:02:05,892 --> 00:02:07,055 Okay, everybody, grab a seat. 55 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,680 We're going to go downtown. 56 00:02:08,715 --> 00:02:10,672 We're going to get your mug shots and fingerprints. 57 00:02:10,707 --> 00:02:12,531 You know what? Any cooperation we get from you 58 00:02:12,566 --> 00:02:14,028 would be greatly appreciated. 59 00:02:14,058 --> 00:02:15,621 60 00:02:42,355 --> 00:02:52,703 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 61 00:02:57,069 --> 00:02:58,166 [Metal clatters] 62 00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:00,726 [Clothes hanger squeaks] 63 00:03:10,415 --> 00:03:11,743 The best thing about The Bachelor 64 00:03:11,777 --> 00:03:13,706 is when the villain of the show wins-- 65 00:03:13,740 --> 00:03:14,737 I'm not a bachelor. 66 00:03:14,771 --> 00:03:16,469 The Bachelor is a TV show 67 00:03:16,503 --> 00:03:17,798 on network TV. What? 68 00:03:17,832 --> 00:03:19,063 I don't even own a TV. 69 00:03:19,097 --> 00:03:20,825 [Hearty laugh] 70 00:03:20,860 --> 00:03:23,188 I don't have a TV. 71 00:03:33,935 --> 00:03:35,400 [Various channel chatter] 72 00:03:35,434 --> 00:03:37,527 [Woman] Coming up on MTV. 73 00:03:37,562 --> 00:03:38,759 [Crying] Teen Mom premiere's on an all-new night 74 00:03:38,794 --> 00:03:39,958 starting at 9:00, 75 00:03:39,992 --> 00:03:42,054 followed by My Super Sweet 16. 76 00:03:42,088 --> 00:03:43,514 What? 77 00:03:43,549 --> 00:03:45,412 Then Snack Time with @sk8erd00d. 78 00:03:45,446 --> 00:03:46,705 What happened? 79 00:03:46,740 --> 00:03:49,700 MTV has been compromised. 80 00:03:49,734 --> 00:03:51,597 Okay. 'Kay, plugged in the TV. 81 00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:53,396 I mean, it said MTV. The logo was there. 82 00:03:53,431 --> 00:03:54,926 I mean, I looked this close to the screen 83 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,690 to see if I was looking at the right thing. 84 00:03:56,724 --> 00:03:59,354 I hate to break it to you, but it's been like that for years. 85 00:03:59,388 --> 00:04:00,616 Why isn't everyone freaking out about it? 86 00:04:00,651 --> 00:04:02,382 Because they don't know any different. 87 00:04:02,417 --> 00:04:05,344 Because they've been spoon-fed these garbage shows. 88 00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:07,706 It's just like all these people getting out of limos 89 00:04:07,740 --> 00:04:09,803 and Sweet 16 this and pregnant 90 00:04:09,838 --> 00:04:11,467 and all these, like, parties and-- 91 00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,366 Who's watching that? 92 00:04:13,401 --> 00:04:15,364 Remember it used to be just music videos and 120 Minutes 93 00:04:15,398 --> 00:04:16,927 and, like, VJs and everything? 94 00:04:16,961 --> 00:04:18,490 Remember MTV music news, 95 00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:20,688 with the satellite-- [Imitates pounding]. 96 00:04:20,722 --> 00:04:21,987 The day Kurt Cobain died, 97 00:04:22,021 --> 00:04:24,749 and Kurt Loder got on MTV, and he teared up? 98 00:04:24,784 --> 00:04:26,215 I mean, that was a huge moment. 99 00:04:26,250 --> 00:04:27,579 It was the town square. 100 00:04:27,613 --> 00:04:29,710 Do people even know about rocking the vote anymore? 101 00:04:29,744 --> 00:04:31,310 Rock the vote. Ch-ch. 102 00:04:31,344 --> 00:04:34,240 People used to just really rock the shit out of the vote. 103 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,467 Yeah, they'd take that vote, and they would rock it. 104 00:04:37,502 --> 00:04:39,542 It's like they don't even know what they're missing. 105 00:04:42,930 --> 00:04:45,792 Let's take back MTV, me and you. 106 00:04:45,826 --> 00:04:47,224 Why not? We can do it. 107 00:04:47,259 --> 00:04:48,357 Why now? I mean, it's been-- 108 00:04:48,389 --> 00:04:49,687 [loudly] Why now? 109 00:04:49,722 --> 00:04:51,253 By the way, I'm not yelling at you. 110 00:04:51,288 --> 00:04:52,851 I'm saying "Why now?" Kind of metaphor-- 111 00:04:52,885 --> 00:04:53,884 you know, just, like, it's a bigger picture. 112 00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:55,516 I mean, it's not you. 113 00:04:55,550 --> 00:04:57,283 This is the quietest you've ever talked to me. 114 00:04:57,317 --> 00:04:59,412 Governments have been overthrown in the middle east. 115 00:04:59,447 --> 00:05:01,279 If they can do it, why can't we do it? 116 00:05:01,313 --> 00:05:02,543 We're old. 117 00:05:02,577 --> 00:05:03,642 We're not old. 118 00:05:03,676 --> 00:05:04,841 Well, we are kind of. 119 00:05:04,875 --> 00:05:06,405 Look at your hair. Come on. 120 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:07,805 Come on. 121 00:05:07,839 --> 00:05:10,435 Okay, I'm just--I'm just saying-- Look. 122 00:05:10,469 --> 00:05:11,468 I mean. 123 00:05:11,503 --> 00:05:12,703 Yeah, I can see your point. 124 00:05:12,737 --> 00:05:14,137 We march in there and we say, 125 00:05:14,171 --> 00:05:15,903 "you don't control the network." 126 00:05:15,938 --> 00:05:19,100 What we need is this monolithic entity 127 00:05:19,134 --> 00:05:22,132 that says, "we are music. Let's go forth." 128 00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:24,464 Iris, we've got to take back MTV. 129 00:05:24,499 --> 00:05:26,366 I'm with you, Spike. Yeah! 130 00:05:26,401 --> 00:05:28,300 I want my MTV. 131 00:05:28,334 --> 00:05:30,299 Let's go right now. 132 00:05:30,333 --> 00:05:32,762 Also, we've got to get somebody to take care of the cats, 133 00:05:32,797 --> 00:05:34,229 and we need someone to water the plants. 134 00:05:34,264 --> 00:05:35,196 What plants? 135 00:05:42,768 --> 00:05:44,936 Okay, everyone, let's be seated. 136 00:05:46,706 --> 00:05:48,540 Namaste. 137 00:05:48,575 --> 00:05:51,611 Today we will begin the practice of vipassana meditation. 138 00:05:51,645 --> 00:05:53,552 At first it may seem somewhat passive, 139 00:05:53,586 --> 00:05:55,388 but after hour four or five, 140 00:05:55,422 --> 00:05:59,192 a more active, transformative experience starts to take over. 141 00:05:59,227 --> 00:06:01,662 So to begin with, we'll just sit comfortably, 142 00:06:01,696 --> 00:06:04,297 and with our eyes open, looking straight ahead, 143 00:06:04,332 --> 00:06:06,733 you'll just settle in to the silence. 144 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,868 [Woman] All right, just let the day go. 145 00:06:08,903 --> 00:06:10,737 Okay, don't think about work. 146 00:06:10,772 --> 00:06:13,373 [Instructor] You'll feel your breath going in and out. 147 00:06:13,408 --> 00:06:15,843 Huh, is he looking at me? 148 00:06:15,878 --> 00:06:19,214 Wow, he has really nice eyes. 149 00:06:19,248 --> 00:06:23,084 Oh, he probably rides a motorcycle. 150 00:06:26,789 --> 00:06:28,923 Feel your place in the state. 151 00:06:28,958 --> 00:06:30,825 Imagine your place. 152 00:06:30,860 --> 00:06:32,761 Okay, he is looking at me. 153 00:06:38,734 --> 00:06:42,438 Oh, he is totally making eye contact. 154 00:06:47,845 --> 00:06:50,013 Okay, just focus on him. 155 00:06:50,048 --> 00:06:52,649 And your awareness will expand until you feel your place 156 00:06:52,684 --> 00:06:53,849 in the universe. 157 00:06:53,884 --> 00:06:56,119 I want this. 158 00:07:05,499 --> 00:07:07,467 [Deep voice] I love you. 159 00:07:07,501 --> 00:07:10,303 [Instructor] Okay, namaste. 160 00:07:12,038 --> 00:07:16,708 Just gradually return your awareness to yourself. 161 00:07:16,743 --> 00:07:21,480 And welcome back. 162 00:07:21,514 --> 00:07:23,415 [Nasally voice] Hey, can I talk to you for a minute? 163 00:07:23,449 --> 00:07:25,617 You know, we pay $40 a session, 164 00:07:25,651 --> 00:07:28,253 and there's a 2:00, supposed to be at 7:00. 165 00:07:28,287 --> 00:07:31,423 I come on Monday, and there's no class. 166 00:07:31,457 --> 00:07:32,825 Sorry, I don't set the schedule. 167 00:07:32,859 --> 00:07:34,326 What can I do to make it-- 168 00:07:34,361 --> 00:07:36,695 Well, somebody's gotta-- I want my money back. 169 00:07:36,730 --> 00:07:38,397 That's all. I want my money back, 170 00:07:38,431 --> 00:07:40,466 'cause I'm about to walk out of these things. 171 00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:43,505 I'm sure I'm not the only person who's dissatisfied. 172 00:07:43,540 --> 00:07:46,110 Now, sweetie over here, the pretty woman over there, 173 00:07:46,145 --> 00:07:48,380 I'm sure she's got the same complaints. 174 00:07:48,415 --> 00:07:49,849 I was lookin' at her. 175 00:07:49,883 --> 00:07:50,883 I wanna think of things. 176 00:07:50,917 --> 00:07:52,584 I wanna use my imagination 177 00:07:52,619 --> 00:07:54,720 when I'm sittin' there with my ass on a pillow. 178 00:07:54,754 --> 00:07:55,888 I wanna do that. 179 00:07:55,922 --> 00:07:57,323 You should have a warning. 180 00:07:57,357 --> 00:07:58,524 There's something you should say, 181 00:07:58,558 --> 00:07:59,926 and that's not what I was told. 182 00:08:01,628 --> 00:08:03,236 Namaste. 183 00:08:03,714 --> 00:08:05,382 Hi. I'm Royce. And I'm Alisha. 184 00:08:05,416 --> 00:08:07,150 And I'm her boss. [Clock cuckoos] 185 00:08:07,185 --> 00:08:09,085 You're all familiar with the drawbacks of cow's milk. 186 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:10,821 Don't drink cow's milk. Use alternatives like soy milk, 187 00:08:10,855 --> 00:08:12,456 rice milk, almond milk. 188 00:08:12,490 --> 00:08:14,091 Those are actually not that great for you. 189 00:08:14,125 --> 00:08:16,160 There's an alternative. We recommend zucchini milk. 190 00:08:16,194 --> 00:08:17,728 Processing and making zucchini milk-- Zucchini milk. 191 00:08:17,762 --> 00:08:19,897 It involves taking the pulp-- The pulp. 192 00:08:19,931 --> 00:08:21,799 And making-- Making--[Slurps] 193 00:08:21,833 --> 00:08:23,134 Mixing it with water. Tastes just like fresh zucchini. 194 00:08:23,168 --> 00:08:24,602 He's my boss. I am her boss. 195 00:08:24,636 --> 00:08:26,884 What does "boss" mean exactly? Doesn't matter. 196 00:08:27,004 --> 00:08:28,873 We're coworkers, but I'm the boss. 197 00:08:30,742 --> 00:08:32,076 We love you. 198 00:08:39,437 --> 00:08:40,403 [Chattering] 199 00:08:42,504 --> 00:08:44,418 You must be Spike. Oh, hi. 200 00:08:44,532 --> 00:08:46,001 Terry Melville. How are you, sir? 201 00:08:46,121 --> 00:08:47,306 So great to meet you, Terry. 202 00:08:47,426 --> 00:08:48,503 We got your letter. 203 00:08:48,537 --> 00:08:50,939 We're all excited about your MTV project. 204 00:08:50,973 --> 00:08:53,041 And I gotta tell ya, uh, 205 00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:54,676 those earrings, are they killing you? 206 00:08:54,711 --> 00:08:55,844 Do they hurt you at all? 207 00:08:55,879 --> 00:08:57,680 Oh, I don't even think about them. 208 00:08:57,714 --> 00:08:59,381 Looks real painful, 209 00:08:59,416 --> 00:09:02,218 but I've assembled a group of people in here 210 00:09:02,252 --> 00:09:04,454 that are the greatest minds in philanthropy, 211 00:09:04,488 --> 00:09:06,456 and they're all excited about your project with MTV. 212 00:09:06,490 --> 00:09:08,591 Would you like to meet them? That would be great. 213 00:09:08,626 --> 00:09:11,727 So we have Annie E. Casey of the Annie E. Casey Foundation. 214 00:09:11,762 --> 00:09:14,797 Robert wood Johnson, Robert wood Johnson foundation. 215 00:09:14,832 --> 00:09:18,401 Over here we have John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur, 216 00:09:18,435 --> 00:09:22,972 and in the back we've got John S. and James L. Knight 217 00:09:23,006 --> 00:09:25,541 of the John S. and James L. Knight Foundation, 218 00:09:25,576 --> 00:09:27,576 and-- uh, here he comes. 219 00:09:27,611 --> 00:09:29,845 Mr. like you, I'd like you to meet Spike. 220 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:32,848 Hello, I'm viewers like you. 221 00:09:32,883 --> 00:09:34,650 Oh, it's nice to meet you. 222 00:09:34,684 --> 00:09:36,564 Everything's brought to you by viewers like you. 223 00:09:36,586 --> 00:09:40,023 We're really, really excited to be part of your project. 224 00:09:40,057 --> 00:09:42,692 Hey, everybody, raise your glasses 225 00:09:42,726 --> 00:09:44,961 to Spike's MTV dreams. Skaal. 226 00:09:44,995 --> 00:09:46,796 [People applauding] 227 00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:51,701 I want my MTV 228 00:09:53,504 --> 00:09:56,539 Maybe because she's crazy. Call you back. 229 00:09:56,573 --> 00:09:57,540 Kurt Loder? 230 00:09:57,574 --> 00:09:58,875 Yes. 231 00:10:01,678 --> 00:10:03,713 Hey. Hi, Tabitha Soren? 232 00:10:03,747 --> 00:10:04,981 Yeah. 233 00:10:05,016 --> 00:10:06,450 We have a mission for you. 234 00:10:06,484 --> 00:10:08,018 Tell me more. 235 00:10:10,087 --> 00:10:11,621 Matt Pinfield? 236 00:10:11,656 --> 00:10:13,023 I'll do it. 237 00:10:13,057 --> 00:10:14,791 Oh, that was easy. 238 00:10:14,825 --> 00:10:16,893 Kurt, Matt, Tabitha, 239 00:10:16,928 --> 00:10:20,163 thanks for helping us with this plan to take back MTV. 240 00:10:20,198 --> 00:10:21,698 It's about walking in there like we own it 241 00:10:21,733 --> 00:10:23,533 because we do-- because you guys do. 242 00:10:23,568 --> 00:10:25,035 You built it. The people own it. 243 00:10:25,069 --> 00:10:26,603 That's your house. 244 00:10:26,638 --> 00:10:28,872 MTV's been taken over by tweens, 245 00:10:28,906 --> 00:10:31,742 and this elite squad's going to help us get it back to where it was. 246 00:10:31,776 --> 00:10:32,910 Here's our plan. 247 00:10:32,944 --> 00:10:34,411 Okay, we did some research. 248 00:10:34,446 --> 00:10:36,914 We found out that MTV 249 00:10:36,948 --> 00:10:39,850 is mostly likely shot 250 00:10:39,885 --> 00:10:43,754 in a city called New York City. 251 00:10:43,789 --> 00:10:45,423 Yes. Yeah. 252 00:10:45,457 --> 00:10:46,857 You know this. [Soren] Yeah, we worked there. 253 00:10:46,892 --> 00:10:48,693 Y-- Right, they worked there, 254 00:10:48,727 --> 00:10:50,094 so, you see, you guys lived there. [Loder] Yeah, we were there. 255 00:10:50,128 --> 00:10:51,495 Okay, all right. 256 00:10:51,530 --> 00:10:53,564 Second floor studio. 257 00:10:53,598 --> 00:10:55,565 I've got a lot of--got a lot of the statue of liberty. 258 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,000 Let me get through some of these. 259 00:10:57,034 --> 00:10:58,935 You guys been to the statue of liberty? 260 00:10:58,969 --> 00:11:00,703 Uh-- it's far away from MTV. 261 00:11:00,738 --> 00:11:02,572 It is. Okay. 262 00:11:02,606 --> 00:11:04,407 I don't know how this-- how are we supposed to pull this off? 263 00:11:04,441 --> 00:11:06,943 I mean, I know we can. Kurt. 264 00:11:06,978 --> 00:11:09,045 I think Matt will get us into the building. 265 00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:10,447 Okay. What's the next step? 266 00:11:10,481 --> 00:11:12,782 Does anyone have any special skills? 267 00:11:12,816 --> 00:11:14,583 I can be sardonic. 268 00:11:14,618 --> 00:11:17,553 Are you going to pay moving expenses for my family? 269 00:11:17,587 --> 00:11:19,021 Because I have three children now, and-- 270 00:11:19,056 --> 00:11:21,057 can we do a two out of three? 271 00:11:21,091 --> 00:11:24,560 They're tweens, so they might know how to make the transition easier. 272 00:11:24,594 --> 00:11:25,927 We could use that. 273 00:11:25,962 --> 00:11:27,929 And I have a tween who's 13 down south, 274 00:11:27,964 --> 00:11:30,398 so I'll need you guys to fly her in and out to visit 275 00:11:30,433 --> 00:11:32,067 to play with Tabitha's tweens. 276 00:11:33,002 --> 00:11:34,102 What are tweens exactly? 277 00:11:34,137 --> 00:11:35,377 Do you all know what tweens are? 278 00:11:35,405 --> 00:11:36,939 I also have a housing thing. 279 00:11:36,973 --> 00:11:38,341 I live in New York, 280 00:11:38,375 --> 00:11:39,842 but I want to live in a bigger place. 281 00:11:39,876 --> 00:11:41,243 That's what I want. 282 00:11:41,277 --> 00:11:43,844 I think we can do this. My blood is pumping. 283 00:11:43,879 --> 00:11:45,579 Kurt, do a news story about it. What's the headline? 284 00:11:45,614 --> 00:11:48,447 I think I see "MTV headquarters was invaded 285 00:11:48,481 --> 00:11:51,049 "by a band of music liberation people, 286 00:11:51,084 --> 00:11:52,751 and Tabitha Soren has the story." 287 00:11:52,785 --> 00:11:56,021 I'm down here on the first floor of 1515 Broadway, 288 00:11:56,056 --> 00:12:00,159 and I see a band of adults, 289 00:12:00,194 --> 00:12:01,094 it looks like, 290 00:12:01,128 --> 00:12:03,229 busting through security. 291 00:12:03,263 --> 00:12:05,264 I'm not sure what's going to happen next. 292 00:12:05,298 --> 00:12:08,367 We'll let you know. That's the news for now. 293 00:12:08,402 --> 00:12:10,370 D-d-d-d-d boom boom boom boom... 294 00:12:10,404 --> 00:12:12,105 D-d-d-d-d. dum dum dum 295 00:12:12,139 --> 00:12:15,075 Yes! Yeah! Get back on your thrones. 296 00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,577 I mean, I'm in. 297 00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:17,945 Well, you're in. 298 00:12:17,980 --> 00:12:19,514 And speaking of urine, 299 00:12:19,548 --> 00:12:20,982 we're going to Manhattan. 300 00:12:23,299 --> 00:12:27,069 We are here to discuss a proposal to rename northeast 15th Avenue. 301 00:12:27,103 --> 00:12:30,172 Now, before we start, I need to run down a few criteria. 302 00:12:30,206 --> 00:12:32,841 City streets may only be renamed after a prominent person. 303 00:12:32,876 --> 00:12:34,276 Such prominent person must be 304 00:12:34,311 --> 00:12:36,379 one, a person who's achieved prominence 305 00:12:36,413 --> 00:12:39,416 as a result of his or her significant positive contribution 306 00:12:39,450 --> 00:12:40,550 to the United States of America 307 00:12:40,585 --> 00:12:42,352 and or the local community, 308 00:12:42,387 --> 00:12:44,355 two-- a real person, 309 00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:47,424 and three-- a person who has been deceased for at least five years. 310 00:12:47,459 --> 00:12:49,393 So without further ado 311 00:12:49,427 --> 00:12:50,460 I open the meeting up to suggestions. 312 00:12:50,495 --> 00:12:52,129 Yes, sir. 313 00:12:52,164 --> 00:12:55,199 Hi, uh, I'm Malcolm singer. This is my wife Chris. 314 00:12:55,234 --> 00:12:56,534 Hi, guys. 315 00:12:56,569 --> 00:12:59,204 What was the second piece of criteria? 316 00:12:59,238 --> 00:13:01,973 The second-- uh, real person. 317 00:13:02,008 --> 00:13:03,642 So it has to be a real person. Yeah. 318 00:13:03,676 --> 00:13:06,579 Okay, so I know that that...person, 319 00:13:06,613 --> 00:13:09,214 but for 15th Avenue, 320 00:13:09,249 --> 00:13:10,683 which is a beautiful street, 321 00:13:10,717 --> 00:13:15,621 I thought, what if we do film history Avenue? 322 00:13:15,656 --> 00:13:18,691 Didn't he just say a real person? 323 00:13:18,725 --> 00:13:21,126 But there are real people who are in film history. 324 00:13:21,161 --> 00:13:22,094 Call me a traditionalist-- 325 00:13:22,129 --> 00:13:23,363 You're a traditionalist. 326 00:13:23,398 --> 00:13:25,833 I was addressing him. But thank you. 327 00:13:25,868 --> 00:13:27,935 What I would like to do is go ahead 328 00:13:27,970 --> 00:13:32,642 and plan to vote on renaming the street after Dr. Martin Luther king, Jr. 329 00:13:32,677 --> 00:13:34,411 Is that okay? 330 00:13:34,445 --> 00:13:35,846 It's fine with me. 331 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:37,481 Um, do you know we already have an MLK. 332 00:13:37,516 --> 00:13:39,450 It would be double the honor. 333 00:13:39,484 --> 00:13:41,085 I think it's confusing. 334 00:13:41,119 --> 00:13:45,322 Is there a Martin Luther King, Sr. we could do instead? 335 00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:51,061 I was thinking more Mel Blanc or Ken Kesey. 336 00:13:51,095 --> 00:13:53,030 Can we do music street? 337 00:13:53,064 --> 00:13:54,564 What does this say? 338 00:13:54,599 --> 00:13:56,967 "Real person." Thank you. 339 00:13:57,001 --> 00:14:01,738 So we're not doing cartoon characters or anything in our imagination. 340 00:14:01,772 --> 00:14:03,039 This guy's got some great ideas. 341 00:14:03,074 --> 00:14:04,975 Well, let's hear some. 342 00:14:05,009 --> 00:14:06,310 The other morning I just came up with kugupu. 343 00:14:06,344 --> 00:14:07,345 Oh, this is good. 344 00:14:07,379 --> 00:14:09,113 K-u-g-u-p-u. 345 00:14:09,147 --> 00:14:14,518 It's a sort of floating, lava-ish sort of orb. 346 00:14:14,553 --> 00:14:16,187 You should see what I'm picturing. 347 00:14:16,221 --> 00:14:18,289 I could barely describe it because it's so colorful. 348 00:14:18,324 --> 00:14:21,226 And I really don't mean to throw cold water on your idea, 349 00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:22,394 but it's not a real person. 350 00:14:22,429 --> 00:14:24,330 It's not a real person. 351 00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:26,231 And that is one of the parameters that we have to stay within. 352 00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:28,801 There is one episode where all the kids come up to kugupu. 353 00:14:28,835 --> 00:14:31,337 They're like, "kugupu, you're not a real person," 354 00:14:31,372 --> 00:14:33,339 and he's like, "actually, I am." 355 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:34,540 So he is. 356 00:14:35,676 --> 00:14:38,010 I don't like "kugubu." 357 00:14:38,045 --> 00:14:40,045 I have been reading Steve Jobs' biography. 358 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:42,114 It talks about how he went to Reed college 359 00:14:42,148 --> 00:14:43,709 in southeast Portland his freshman year. 360 00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:46,386 [Loud pouring] 361 00:14:49,690 --> 00:14:51,358 Some more water. 362 00:14:51,392 --> 00:14:52,393 [Continuing] 363 00:14:55,464 --> 00:14:57,197 Can you get me in? Sure. 364 00:14:57,231 --> 00:15:01,370 Okay. Okay. Here we go. 365 00:15:01,404 --> 00:15:03,284 Are you going to hog the floor the entire night? 366 00:15:03,306 --> 00:15:04,407 Why don't we do this? 367 00:15:04,441 --> 00:15:06,442 Why don't we call 15th Avenue-- 368 00:15:06,477 --> 00:15:08,578 Leave it as is, 369 00:15:08,612 --> 00:15:12,215 but in parentheses write "Northeast 14th Avenue"? 370 00:15:14,151 --> 00:15:16,285 Did you even think that through? No, I did not. 371 00:15:19,723 --> 00:15:23,225 [Male voice] Turn left on Martin Luther king, Sr., 372 00:15:23,260 --> 00:15:24,760 Mel Blanc, kugupu, 373 00:15:24,794 --> 00:15:27,563 Steve Jobs, Ken Kesey, 374 00:15:27,597 --> 00:15:30,332 Music, Film History, 375 00:15:30,366 --> 00:15:32,067 Calligraphy Street. 376 00:15:38,308 --> 00:15:40,409 All right, Cath, is the leveler-- 377 00:15:40,444 --> 00:15:42,145 Should it be straight completely? Does it matter? 378 00:15:42,179 --> 00:15:43,613 I just want to be in the back doing mallet tricks. 379 00:15:43,647 --> 00:15:45,081 Okay. 380 00:15:45,115 --> 00:15:47,783 Hey, I'm Dave. I'm Cath. 381 00:15:47,817 --> 00:15:50,519 And we just purchased something called the polar ii tent. 382 00:15:50,553 --> 00:15:52,320 It's lightweight. 383 00:15:52,354 --> 00:15:55,082 The fabric is polyester-- polyester taffeta. 384 00:15:56,582 --> 00:15:58,249 [Loudly clears throat] 385 00:15:58,283 --> 00:15:59,849 Dan, from time to time, 386 00:15:59,884 --> 00:16:01,784 I want to give you little pointers and suggestions 387 00:16:01,818 --> 00:16:02,784 on how to edit this. 388 00:16:02,818 --> 00:16:04,085 Edit those parts out. 389 00:16:04,119 --> 00:16:05,618 Okay, let's build the tent. 390 00:16:05,653 --> 00:16:06,719 That goes on the ground. 391 00:16:06,753 --> 00:16:09,187 Make sure there's no dust. 392 00:16:09,221 --> 00:16:12,621 Just fade in the words "Part I-- setting up your tent, mapping it out." 393 00:16:12,655 --> 00:16:15,388 What you want to do is map out your tent map on the ground. 394 00:16:15,423 --> 00:16:17,156 We've made that mistake hundreds of times. 395 00:16:17,191 --> 00:16:18,657 Not hundreds of times. 396 00:16:18,691 --> 00:16:20,357 [Clearthroat] 397 00:16:20,392 --> 00:16:22,225 I just think that we've made that mistake one time. 398 00:16:22,260 --> 00:16:23,525 Doy. 399 00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,493 We're going to start out with the poles. 400 00:16:25,527 --> 00:16:27,327 And this is just kind of a magic trick 401 00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,862 that happens. 402 00:16:29,896 --> 00:16:31,829 If you just keep waving it around 403 00:16:31,863 --> 00:16:33,730 until it forms the shape that you want. 404 00:16:33,764 --> 00:16:35,630 Maybe put some classical music, 405 00:16:35,664 --> 00:16:36,931 [hums] Like-- 406 00:16:39,599 --> 00:16:40,632 Watch out for my eyes. 407 00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:42,766 The rods extend over the tent, 408 00:16:42,801 --> 00:16:44,600 and you'll clip them in like so. 409 00:16:44,635 --> 00:16:45,934 Find the circular grommet, 410 00:16:45,969 --> 00:16:48,069 put the spike in, and hammer it down. 411 00:16:48,103 --> 00:16:49,469 Okay, so you got your tent set up. 412 00:16:49,504 --> 00:16:50,803 Make sure-- once again, 413 00:16:50,837 --> 00:16:52,637 there's a lot of things that can happen 414 00:16:52,671 --> 00:16:55,072 where, like, you can get hit by the wind-- 415 00:16:55,106 --> 00:16:58,139 and this does double-- this is a wind-powered-- 416 00:16:58,174 --> 00:17:01,273 Hey, Aaron buddy, how long have you been back there? 417 00:17:01,307 --> 00:17:02,640 Aaron! 418 00:17:02,675 --> 00:17:03,641 Buddy, we're trying to make a video. 419 00:17:03,675 --> 00:17:05,641 Do you not see the camera? 420 00:17:05,675 --> 00:17:06,708 Hey, Mickey! 421 00:17:06,742 --> 00:17:08,709 He's doing it to irritate us. 422 00:17:08,743 --> 00:17:10,663 You're using the backdrop of my beautiful garden. 423 00:17:10,677 --> 00:17:12,877 Give us 20 minutes. A little privacy, please. 424 00:17:12,911 --> 00:17:14,811 So it's got a front and a back. 425 00:17:14,846 --> 00:17:16,578 Remember, you don't want to put this on top of your car. 426 00:17:16,613 --> 00:17:17,712 [Chuckles] 427 00:17:17,747 --> 00:17:19,413 Dan, put a laugh track there. 428 00:17:19,447 --> 00:17:21,447 [Laughing] 429 00:17:23,149 --> 00:17:24,582 So just use that as a laugh track. 430 00:17:24,616 --> 00:17:26,649 Try to think sort of medium-sized theatre. 431 00:17:26,683 --> 00:17:30,584 And you'll see it doesn't have the most traditional shape, 432 00:17:30,618 --> 00:17:31,651 as far as a tent goes. 433 00:17:31,685 --> 00:17:34,152 Hey! Aaron! Stop it! 434 00:17:34,187 --> 00:17:35,453 Put that finger down. 435 00:17:35,487 --> 00:17:36,453 God damn it. 436 00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:38,388 Anyway-- 437 00:17:38,422 --> 00:17:39,822 anyway-- 438 00:17:39,856 --> 00:17:43,223 anyway-- anyway-- 439 00:17:43,257 --> 00:17:44,357 [Mickey] How much longer are you going to be-- 440 00:17:44,391 --> 00:17:45,792 You're ruining our tent video! 441 00:17:45,826 --> 00:17:47,426 I know, I know. You're ruining the tent video. 442 00:17:47,460 --> 00:17:49,493 I don't want to have to start from the beginning again. 443 00:17:49,528 --> 00:17:51,161 I'm sorry I'm ruining the tent video. [Train horn blowing] 444 00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:52,661 Train's coming through. What else can go wrong? 445 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,696 Where's the other Spike? 446 00:17:54,730 --> 00:17:55,863 Are all the Spikes there? 447 00:17:55,898 --> 00:17:57,831 Hey, so once you got your tent set up, 448 00:17:57,865 --> 00:17:59,598 you can open up the zipper and go on in. 449 00:17:59,632 --> 00:18:00,965 [Whistle noise] [Yells] 450 00:18:02,833 --> 00:18:04,866 I'm done. I'm really, really sorry. 451 00:18:04,900 --> 00:18:07,533 Make this tent video on your own. 452 00:18:07,567 --> 00:18:11,501 I assume you're smiling and you're sympathetic to how hard it is for me, too. 453 00:18:11,535 --> 00:18:12,835 I really need you right now. 454 00:18:12,870 --> 00:18:14,670 Come here. 455 00:18:14,704 --> 00:18:16,004 Dan, edit this part out. 456 00:18:16,038 --> 00:18:18,239 Is he over there? Is he over there? 457 00:18:20,374 --> 00:18:22,208 Get out! Dan, this whole part-- 458 00:18:22,242 --> 00:18:24,376 Don't even put it on by mistake. Okay? 459 00:18:24,410 --> 00:18:26,510 YouTube users do not want to see this kind of thing. 460 00:18:26,545 --> 00:18:29,679 They want to see a concise video. 461 00:18:29,713 --> 00:18:31,446 I want it deleted and erased. 462 00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:33,181 I don't know how you do it in your editing booth. 463 00:18:33,215 --> 00:18:34,215 Dave? Yeah. 464 00:18:34,249 --> 00:18:35,182 I'm trapped. 465 00:18:57,584 --> 00:19:01,586 I want my 466 00:19:01,621 --> 00:19:07,893 MTV 467 00:19:07,927 --> 00:19:13,032 I want my MTV 468 00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:18,371 I want my, I want my 469 00:19:18,405 --> 00:19:22,208 I want my MTV 470 00:19:22,242 --> 00:19:24,783 Hi there. I want my MTV. 471 00:19:24,903 --> 00:19:26,880 Wait. What? 472 00:19:26,914 --> 00:19:29,383 We're here to take over. 473 00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:30,884 What? 474 00:19:32,053 --> 00:19:32,953 What? 475 00:19:32,987 --> 00:19:33,912 What's up, you guys? 476 00:19:33,978 --> 00:19:37,527 We're counting down the top ten healthy snacks to have after school. 477 00:19:37,647 --> 00:19:39,147 [Man] Frosty. 478 00:19:39,182 --> 00:19:40,982 What's up, man? How's the family? 479 00:19:41,017 --> 00:19:42,150 We're back. We're taking over the station 480 00:19:42,185 --> 00:19:43,718 and make it what it once was. 481 00:19:43,753 --> 00:19:46,254 Benefits and everything are pretty much gonna be the same. 482 00:19:46,288 --> 00:19:48,089 You're going to love this. 483 00:19:48,124 --> 00:19:49,958 It's gonna bring back a lot of memories. Check this out. 484 00:19:49,992 --> 00:19:52,461 Ready? Okay. Let's do it. 485 00:19:52,495 --> 00:19:54,396 Take back MTV? 486 00:19:54,430 --> 00:19:55,964 Take back the youth-oriented channel from the youth? 487 00:19:55,998 --> 00:19:58,233 Have you been watching your own channel? 488 00:19:58,267 --> 00:19:59,601 It's garbage. I don't even know what it is. It's a mess. 489 00:19:59,635 --> 00:20:01,636 Music is dead. 490 00:20:01,671 --> 00:20:04,239 Cable TV has 500 more channels 491 00:20:04,273 --> 00:20:06,041 since you were last watching. 492 00:20:06,075 --> 00:20:08,076 But music is dead because you killed it. 493 00:20:08,111 --> 00:20:09,578 You're killing it. 494 00:20:09,612 --> 00:20:11,446 I don't know who raised you or how you got here, 495 00:20:11,481 --> 00:20:12,581 but that's not nice. 496 00:20:12,615 --> 00:20:14,016 The tweens have taken control. 497 00:20:14,050 --> 00:20:15,117 Yeah, but we're taking control. 498 00:20:15,151 --> 00:20:16,418 No. Yes. 499 00:20:16,453 --> 00:20:17,719 We're in your office. 500 00:20:17,754 --> 00:20:19,488 We invaded your space. Now what? 501 00:20:19,522 --> 00:20:21,189 You're gonna call security? It's not gonna work. 502 00:20:21,224 --> 00:20:24,259 Trish, can you hook these guys up with, like, some swag? 503 00:20:24,293 --> 00:20:26,995 This is what happens when we're rolling into seventh grade. 504 00:20:27,029 --> 00:20:29,364 Is it unfair? Do I need a babysitter? 505 00:20:29,399 --> 00:20:30,535 Show is cancelled. 506 00:20:30,569 --> 00:20:32,704 Excuse me. Dude-- 507 00:20:32,738 --> 00:20:34,772 All right, guys, this is a revolution. 508 00:20:34,807 --> 00:20:37,275 [Beeps] 509 00:20:37,309 --> 00:20:38,643 You know what time it is now? 510 00:20:38,677 --> 00:20:40,545 It's right now. 511 00:20:40,579 --> 00:20:41,646 That's what time it is. 512 00:20:41,681 --> 00:20:43,582 [Iris] It's our time again. 513 00:20:43,616 --> 00:20:45,717 We used to watch shows like 120 Minutes to see cool bands. 514 00:20:45,752 --> 00:20:47,119 Yeah, like Sonic Youth. 515 00:20:47,153 --> 00:20:48,620 Here's the first thing. 516 00:20:48,655 --> 00:20:51,857 Sonic Youth-- the people are, like, 50 years old. 517 00:20:51,891 --> 00:20:54,426 But they're musicians. They're still relevant. 518 00:20:54,460 --> 00:20:55,694 They're dumb. 519 00:20:55,728 --> 00:20:56,995 They are? 520 00:20:57,030 --> 00:20:58,764 Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore 521 00:20:58,798 --> 00:21:00,332 are divorced, 522 00:21:00,367 --> 00:21:03,469 and you're just the orphans left behind. 523 00:21:03,503 --> 00:21:05,337 I suggest that you and your little friend 524 00:21:05,372 --> 00:21:07,740 turn right around and get the hell out of my office. 525 00:21:07,774 --> 00:21:09,575 Yeah? [Man on TV] T-minus four, 526 00:21:09,609 --> 00:21:11,243 three, two, one... Look, Iris. 527 00:21:11,278 --> 00:21:12,845 I'm too depressed. No, look! 528 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,413 Liftoff. 529 00:21:14,448 --> 00:21:16,015 [Iris gasps] 530 00:21:16,050 --> 00:21:18,117 [MTV theme] We did it. Look at that. 531 00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:19,619 What are you gonna do now? Now what are you gonna do? Huh? 532 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:21,153 Just get out of my face. 533 00:21:21,188 --> 00:21:22,554 You're going to learn so much about music. 534 00:21:22,589 --> 00:21:24,022 You're going to be so excited. 535 00:21:24,057 --> 00:21:25,390 Why would I want to watch that? 536 00:21:25,425 --> 00:21:27,191 Because that's-- that's it. 537 00:21:27,226 --> 00:21:28,759 We won. Good luck. Watch that. 538 00:21:29,795 --> 00:21:32,797 Security, what the heck is... 539 00:21:32,831 --> 00:21:34,399 On my screen right now? 540 00:21:34,433 --> 00:21:35,600 There's, like, a bald man, 541 00:21:35,634 --> 00:21:37,268 a weird looking lady, 542 00:21:37,303 --> 00:21:39,070 and another weird looking man. 543 00:21:39,104 --> 00:21:41,238 What's that doing on my TV? 544 00:21:41,273 --> 00:21:43,675 [Laughs] We made it. I cannot believe it. 545 00:21:43,709 --> 00:21:45,410 Awesome, awesome, yeah. 546 00:21:45,444 --> 00:21:47,645 [Chattering] 547 00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:49,581 Yeah, Kurt Loder. 548 00:21:49,615 --> 00:21:51,082 [Cheering] 549 00:21:51,116 --> 00:21:52,383 [Spike] Tabitha Soren. 550 00:21:52,418 --> 00:21:53,551 Whoo! 551 00:21:53,585 --> 00:21:54,719 [Iris] Matt Pinfield. 552 00:21:54,753 --> 00:21:56,087 Yay. 553 00:21:56,122 --> 00:21:58,490 [Spike] Get used to the faces. 554 00:21:58,524 --> 00:22:00,525 We're here 24/7. 555 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:03,261 [Woman] Music videos from start to fin-- 556 00:22:03,295 --> 00:22:04,395 [turns off] 557 00:22:04,430 --> 00:22:05,530 [Snores] 558 00:22:09,368 --> 00:22:10,734 So all he wants to do is play. 559 00:22:10,768 --> 00:22:12,269 He's, like, yellow and blue, 560 00:22:12,303 --> 00:22:13,737 and he changes colors whenever he's scared. 561 00:22:13,771 --> 00:22:15,706 Two marbles as friends and a-- 562 00:22:15,740 --> 00:22:17,508 they're like-- they're twins. 563 00:22:17,542 --> 00:22:20,110 He's got a pulsing purple light inside him 564 00:22:20,145 --> 00:22:22,112 that only comes out whenever he's lying, 565 00:22:22,147 --> 00:22:24,415 so everyone's like, "kugupu." 566 00:22:24,449 --> 00:22:26,417 Kugubu. 567 00:22:26,883 --> 00:22:31,296 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 568 00:22:31,346 --> 00:22:35,896 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 41517

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