Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,062 --> 00:00:03,195
Kelly: We talked all night.
2
00:00:03,230 --> 00:00:05,130
He was an amazing listener.
3
00:00:05,165 --> 00:00:06,498
Maybe my alien experience
4
00:00:06,533 --> 00:00:09,413
is highlighting some
problems in my marriage.
5
00:00:09,438 --> 00:00:11,484
Have you ever sought
consolation in Christ?
6
00:00:11,516 --> 00:00:12,859
Jonathan: You were
supposed to wipe his mind,
7
00:00:12,884 --> 00:00:14,928
and then implant a memory to
mask the entire experience.
8
00:00:14,953 --> 00:00:17,600
But he's supposed to have
a memory of hitting a deer,
9
00:00:17,625 --> 00:00:19,289
not seeing them in his waking life.
10
00:00:19,324 --> 00:00:20,515
[Exhales]
11
00:00:21,159 --> 00:00:24,193
[Crickets chirping]
12
00:00:28,375 --> 00:00:32,037
Subject 19076.
13
00:00:32,062 --> 00:00:35,169
Retired, 72 years old, widowed.
14
00:00:35,205 --> 00:00:39,718
Subject demonstrated a need
for nonsexual, physical contact.
15
00:00:39,743 --> 00:00:44,109
... 978, 979,
16
00:00:44,134 --> 00:00:46,022
- 9 hundred...
- [Beeps]
17
00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:50,372
Subject 19077.
18
00:00:50,397 --> 00:00:53,988
Subject has a fascination with
puzzles and modern warfare,
19
00:00:54,024 --> 00:00:56,843
demonstrated a need for
social collaboration.
20
00:00:56,868 --> 00:00:59,100
Subject's memories were wiped.
21
00:00:59,210 --> 00:01:02,014
No memories of our
encounter will remain.
22
00:01:02,475 --> 00:01:04,298
- [Beeps]
- Computer voice: Saving.
23
00:01:09,506 --> 00:01:12,540
24
00:01:13,666 --> 00:01:15,471
Kelly: Thanks for listening.
25
00:01:15,682 --> 00:01:19,180
I haven't felt this comfortable
talking to anybody in a while.
26
00:01:19,215 --> 00:01:21,189
I feel like I could tell you anything.
27
00:01:21,346 --> 00:01:24,185
- Thank you.
- You are an awesome listener.
28
00:01:24,220 --> 00:01:25,753
Anyway, what... what about you?
29
00:01:25,796 --> 00:01:27,128
What's your deal?
30
00:01:29,643 --> 00:01:30,939
I, uh...
31
00:01:30,964 --> 00:01:33,961
No one has ever asked me anything...
32
00:01:34,174 --> 00:01:35,518
about my deal.
33
00:01:35,543 --> 00:01:36,735
Jeff: Damn it!
34
00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,721
Stupid piece of crap!
35
00:01:39,169 --> 00:01:41,436
Garbage stuff that
just gets in the way...
36
00:01:41,471 --> 00:01:42,670
[Groans]
37
00:01:42,706 --> 00:01:44,038
H-hey!
38
00:01:44,074 --> 00:01:47,016
Jeff, you seem angry.
39
00:01:47,041 --> 00:01:49,924
Just going through
our research on 28409,
40
00:01:50,119 --> 00:01:53,448
and he's demonstrated a heightened
ability to recover memories.
41
00:01:53,483 --> 00:01:56,384
Yeah, that's why Kurt put the
implant in him in the first place.
42
00:01:56,419 --> 00:02:00,471
Well, if you ask me,
28409's a time bomb.
43
00:02:00,496 --> 00:02:01,650
[Sighs]
44
00:02:01,675 --> 00:02:03,432
I'm gonna attempt a manual reset.
45
00:02:03,486 --> 00:02:06,894
That's very, very risky.
46
00:02:06,930 --> 00:02:08,129
I'll figure it out.
47
00:02:08,164 --> 00:02:09,897
I'm pretty technical.
48
00:02:10,939 --> 00:02:14,064
[Feedback] Ahh! Mm!
49
00:02:15,103 --> 00:02:17,252
[Sighs] Did that do
anything? I can't even tell.
50
00:02:17,277 --> 00:02:19,006
I'm not sure this is wise
51
00:02:19,042 --> 00:02:22,385
with your lack of patience
and little fingers.
52
00:02:22,410 --> 00:02:23,911
Oh, [bleep] off.
53
00:02:24,532 --> 00:02:25,698
You want to be helpful?
54
00:02:25,723 --> 00:02:27,571
Kurt's killer is still at large.
55
00:02:27,596 --> 00:02:29,383
See if you can track
down the car that hit him.
56
00:02:29,419 --> 00:02:31,319
It had an "Empathy" bumper sticker.
57
00:02:31,354 --> 00:02:32,620
Find it.
58
00:02:32,655 --> 00:02:34,322
The bumper.
59
00:02:35,244 --> 00:02:36,257
[Beeps]
60
00:02:36,292 --> 00:02:39,327
61
00:02:48,271 --> 00:02:50,671
Hey, Nancy, I'm not feeling that great,
62
00:02:50,707 --> 00:02:53,800
so if it's cool, I'm just
gonna duck out a little early.
63
00:02:57,668 --> 00:02:58,972
Okay.
64
00:02:58,997 --> 00:03:00,269
65
00:03:00,309 --> 00:03:02,027
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
66
00:03:02,052 --> 00:03:03,552
Ozzie: Dengue fever?
67
00:03:03,577 --> 00:03:05,010
It's unlikely.
68
00:03:06,777 --> 00:03:09,624
[Breathes shallowly] Ovarian cysts? No.
69
00:03:10,393 --> 00:03:13,368
I wonder if I hold these
two down at the same time...
70
00:03:13,396 --> 00:03:15,855
- [Beeps]
- [Mariachi band plays]
71
00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:19,767
Oh, man, these guys are good.
72
00:03:19,803 --> 00:03:20,902
[Whimpers]
73
00:03:20,937 --> 00:03:22,300
[Music stops]
74
00:03:22,728 --> 00:03:24,138
[Exhales sharply]
75
00:03:24,174 --> 00:03:25,957
Oh, thank God.
76
00:03:25,982 --> 00:03:28,433
[Knocks at door]
77
00:03:28,478 --> 00:03:29,855
Hi, am I interrupting?
78
00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:31,160
Uh, no...
79
00:03:31,220 --> 00:03:33,187
just doin' the Lord's work.
80
00:03:34,597 --> 00:03:36,769
I'm kidding. Times crossword.
81
00:03:36,794 --> 00:03:39,787
[Laughs]
82
00:03:39,812 --> 00:03:41,189
Anyway, I just wanted to stop by
83
00:03:41,224 --> 00:03:42,644
and tell you that I
picked up one of these.
84
00:03:42,669 --> 00:03:44,058
Well, that's great.
85
00:03:44,093 --> 00:03:46,582
- How do you like it?
- I'm loving it.
86
00:03:47,508 --> 00:03:49,541
I actually really, um...
you know who I'm digging?
87
00:03:49,566 --> 00:03:51,158
I'm digging, um, Mary.
88
00:03:51,183 --> 00:03:53,238
- Of course, Mary.
- I don't know. She's great.
89
00:03:53,263 --> 00:03:55,464
I just really relate to
what she went through.
90
00:03:55,489 --> 00:03:57,271
I feel like we're, um...
91
00:03:57,307 --> 00:03:59,355
I don't know... I feel
like we're the same.
92
00:04:01,097 --> 00:04:02,455
Is that blasphemous?
93
00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:03,777
No. No.
94
00:04:03,802 --> 00:04:05,166
Mary's the best...
95
00:04:05,191 --> 00:04:07,381
courageous, small-town girl,
96
00:04:07,417 --> 00:04:10,400
a bit of a rebel, rode a
donkey nine-months pregnant.
97
00:04:10,425 --> 00:04:12,753
And that's a strong female
protagonist, actually.
98
00:04:12,789 --> 00:04:15,222
[Laughs]
99
00:04:15,793 --> 00:04:18,303
- Okay, uh, I'll let you get back.
- Okay.
100
00:04:18,328 --> 00:04:20,728
You know, Chelsea, we are...
101
00:04:20,763 --> 00:04:23,582
we're discussing Mary
in Bible Study this week.
102
00:04:23,607 --> 00:04:24,619
- Oh!
- I know.
103
00:04:24,644 --> 00:04:26,425
If you want to drop by...
104
00:04:26,450 --> 00:04:27,516
Yeah!
105
00:04:27,541 --> 00:04:28,963
Uh, okay. It's a date.
106
00:04:28,988 --> 00:04:30,387
It's a date.
107
00:04:34,121 --> 00:04:36,035
108
00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:37,545
Don: Hi.
109
00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:41,019
110
00:04:49,527 --> 00:04:50,691
Kelly.
111
00:04:53,911 --> 00:04:56,175
Kelly likes coffee.
112
00:04:58,064 --> 00:04:59,207
_
113
00:05:00,503 --> 00:05:02,144
I'm not sure if it's a thyroid thing,
114
00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:03,771
or maybe it's low blood sugar?
115
00:05:03,806 --> 00:05:04,972
Okay, okay.
116
00:05:05,008 --> 00:05:06,307
Here's what you do for headaches.
117
00:05:06,342 --> 00:05:08,691
You take children's
aspirin, you crush it up,
118
00:05:08,716 --> 00:05:10,211
you put it in a club soda,
119
00:05:10,246 --> 00:05:12,135
you pour that in your neti pot,
120
00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:14,300
and then you flush that
through your sinuses.
121
00:05:14,325 --> 00:05:17,332
I don't think a neti pot is gonna
work for a thyroid condition.
122
00:05:17,357 --> 00:05:20,574
Listen, there's not a single
thing that a neti pot can't cure.
123
00:05:20,599 --> 00:05:22,857
I've got a spare one in my
car if you'd like me to get it.
124
00:05:22,892 --> 00:05:26,363
I've got to be honest with
you, I'm not really aaaaaah...
125
00:05:26,388 --> 00:05:28,555
aaaaaaaah...
126
00:05:28,998 --> 00:05:30,871
[Pounding on keyboard]
127
00:05:30,896 --> 00:05:33,121
Ah, God damn it. The system's frozen.
128
00:05:33,146 --> 00:05:34,800
- ... aaaaaaaaah...
- I don't want to pressure you,
129
00:05:34,825 --> 00:05:36,378
- so you just...
- ... aaaaaaaaaah...
130
00:05:36,410 --> 00:05:37,613
... think about it.
131
00:05:37,638 --> 00:05:39,285
... aaaaaaaaaah...
132
00:05:39,318 --> 00:05:41,191
Okay. Rebooting.
133
00:05:42,011 --> 00:05:43,811
... aaaaaa... neti pot guy.
134
00:05:47,803 --> 00:05:49,817
Kelly: Uh, I think I'm
gonna break up with Karl.
135
00:05:49,852 --> 00:05:51,608
Gina: Why? He seemed so nice.
136
00:05:51,633 --> 00:05:53,309
Yeah, he seemed nice.
137
00:05:53,334 --> 00:05:55,272
- Is he not?
- No, he is.
138
00:05:55,297 --> 00:05:58,392
Do you feel like there
may be a pattern here?
139
00:05:58,428 --> 00:06:00,372
Yeah. Dudes are the worst.
140
00:06:00,397 --> 00:06:03,342
Or maybe you're having a hard
time sustaining a relationship
141
00:06:03,367 --> 00:06:04,632
in the wake of your experience.
142
00:06:04,667 --> 00:06:07,601
- My experience was kind of great.
- Well, maybe that's the problem.
143
00:06:07,637 --> 00:06:10,404
Maybe everything else
pales in comparison.
144
00:06:11,407 --> 00:06:12,412
No.
145
00:06:12,775 --> 00:06:16,711
I... think it's just
that he's very boring.
146
00:06:16,746 --> 00:06:19,246
Plus he says "Ore-gone."
147
00:06:19,289 --> 00:06:20,388
"I'm going to 'Ore-gone.'"
148
00:06:20,423 --> 00:06:21,654
It's Oregon. Yeah.
149
00:06:21,687 --> 00:06:23,884
- Man #1: You say Ore-gones.
- Man #2: Oregon?s?
150
00:06:23,912 --> 00:06:26,326
- Dump him.
- You don't say "Al-lab-a-ma."
151
00:06:26,351 --> 00:06:27,395
[Beeps]
152
00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:28,789
- I say Oregon.
- Ore-gon.
153
00:06:28,825 --> 00:06:31,392
- [Slurping loudly]
- Woman: ...body parts...
154
00:06:31,427 --> 00:06:34,061
[Slurping intensifies, all say "Oregon"]
155
00:06:34,097 --> 00:06:36,491
Stop! Richard, stop it!
156
00:06:36,516 --> 00:06:38,850
Your sipping is killing me.
157
00:06:39,350 --> 00:06:40,889
I'm so sorry. [Scoffs]
158
00:06:40,914 --> 00:06:42,999
I-I'm sorry. It's just that my head...
159
00:06:43,024 --> 00:06:44,438
it's-it's throbbing again.
160
00:06:44,474 --> 00:06:46,483
The headaches... they're back?
161
00:06:47,176 --> 00:06:48,850
I'll get the neti.
162
00:06:49,216 --> 00:06:52,580
I don't know what it is. It...
it... Something is seriously wrong.
163
00:06:52,615 --> 00:06:54,655
Aliens probably put a
microphone in your head.
164
00:06:55,201 --> 00:06:57,058
- There it is.
- That's when my headaches started.
165
00:06:57,086 --> 00:06:58,217
Thanks for that,
166
00:06:58,242 --> 00:07:00,208
but I'm gonna go with something
167
00:07:00,233 --> 00:07:02,741
a bit more reasonable,
medically speaking.
168
00:07:02,766 --> 00:07:04,708
Uh, maybe, like, mad cow?
169
00:07:04,733 --> 00:07:06,887
[Auto-tuned] Dude, I
think Ennis is right.
170
00:07:06,912 --> 00:07:08,262
It sounds like alien dickery.
171
00:07:08,288 --> 00:07:11,810
[Auto-tuned] No, I think we're
all tip-toeing around the T-word.
172
00:07:11,850 --> 00:07:13,483
- [Auto-tuned] Microphone?
- Not "Microphone," Ennis.
173
00:07:13,508 --> 00:07:16,137
- The T-word. T!
- [Auto-Tuned] T-Tequila?
174
00:07:16,162 --> 00:07:18,873
Now I'm starting to have hallucinations.
175
00:07:18,908 --> 00:07:21,142
[Normal voice]
Hallucinations? Headaches?
176
00:07:21,177 --> 00:07:23,144
That's a tumor.
177
00:07:25,287 --> 00:07:28,816
Gina: Maybe... can we not be
so free with the word "tumor"?
178
00:07:29,328 --> 00:07:30,794
Okay.
179
00:07:31,006 --> 00:07:33,988
I... I think I need to go to a hospital.
180
00:07:34,023 --> 00:07:35,115
- [Normal voice] Dibs!
- Kelly: [Normal voice] Uh, I better do it.
181
00:07:35,140 --> 00:07:36,271
I'm his sponsor.
182
00:07:36,296 --> 00:07:37,758
No offense...
183
00:07:37,794 --> 00:07:40,027
I think I'm gonna have Gerry take me,
184
00:07:40,063 --> 00:07:42,076
because he's the only one in this room
185
00:07:42,101 --> 00:07:45,545
that is not dressed exactly like me.
186
00:07:46,146 --> 00:07:49,505
Uh, okay. You guys better get a move on.
187
00:07:52,873 --> 00:07:54,039
Doctor: Okay, Mr. Graham...
188
00:07:54,075 --> 00:07:57,255
in a minute, I'm going to ask you
to take a deep breath in and hold it.
189
00:07:57,373 --> 00:07:58,839
You're doing great buddy.
190
00:07:58,874 --> 00:08:00,374
Uh, sir, you're not
supposed to be in here.
191
00:08:00,409 --> 00:08:01,642
Just stay calm, buddy.
192
00:08:01,677 --> 00:08:03,589
I'll be right out here when you're done.
193
00:08:03,614 --> 00:08:07,147
Okay, Mr. Graham...
deep breath in, hold it.
194
00:08:07,182 --> 00:08:09,750
- [Clacks]
- And get ready to boogie.
195
00:08:09,785 --> 00:08:11,652
[Disco music plays]
196
00:08:11,687 --> 00:08:13,120
Oh, no.
197
00:08:13,155 --> 00:08:16,056
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
198
00:08:16,091 --> 00:08:18,700
199
00:08:18,725 --> 00:08:21,461
John, I forgot I have
a thing to do today.
200
00:08:21,497 --> 00:08:23,324
- John: Not that alien-group thing?
- No.
201
00:08:23,349 --> 00:08:24,698
Good. Love you.
202
00:08:30,817 --> 00:08:32,464
Hi.
203
00:08:33,544 --> 00:08:35,755
Am I in the right place?
There's a lot of kids.
204
00:08:35,780 --> 00:08:38,178
[Chuckles] It's an intro
class. It's open to everyone.
205
00:08:38,213 --> 00:08:39,731
Oh. Okay.
206
00:08:40,522 --> 00:08:41,955
Hello.
207
00:08:45,321 --> 00:08:46,692
That seat's saved.
208
00:08:46,717 --> 00:08:48,279
That's kind of weird, 'cause
I'm already sitting in it.
209
00:08:48,304 --> 00:08:49,423
Doug: Eyes up here.
210
00:08:49,458 --> 00:08:51,888
So, does everyone
understand the Virgin Birth?
211
00:08:52,661 --> 00:08:55,566
Yes. That is when Mary has God's baby.
212
00:08:55,591 --> 00:08:56,930
That's right. Jesus.
213
00:08:56,965 --> 00:08:59,700
It doesn't make sense,
because she's a virgin.
214
00:08:59,735 --> 00:09:01,903
Well, that's where the
miracle of it comes into play.
215
00:09:01,928 --> 00:09:04,071
Couldn't she have been
lying about being a virgin?
216
00:09:04,106 --> 00:09:05,272
That's what Joseph thought.
217
00:09:05,307 --> 00:09:07,074
Yes, but he was very, very wrong.
218
00:09:07,109 --> 00:09:08,566
Put yourself in her shoes...
219
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,377
a divine being shows up
in the middle of the night
220
00:09:10,404 --> 00:09:12,495
in your bedroom, tells
you you're special...?
221
00:09:12,528 --> 00:09:14,230
Of course your husband
isn't going to believe that.
222
00:09:14,255 --> 00:09:16,605
He probably thinks you're just doing
this for some sort of attention.
223
00:09:16,630 --> 00:09:18,585
But who wants that kind of attention?
224
00:09:18,620 --> 00:09:20,988
Who would want that kind of attention?
225
00:09:21,013 --> 00:09:23,417
Are... are we still
talking about the Bible?
226
00:09:23,442 --> 00:09:24,678
- Yes. Yes.
- No.
227
00:09:24,703 --> 00:09:25,903
Yes.
228
00:09:27,731 --> 00:09:29,177
Ozzie: Is it my thyroid?
229
00:09:29,333 --> 00:09:30,797
Oh, God. It's my thyroid, isn't it?
230
00:09:30,833 --> 00:09:32,966
Someone's been using the Internet.
231
00:09:33,224 --> 00:09:35,208
- Maybe.
- If you look here,
232
00:09:35,294 --> 00:09:39,489
this little little
opaque spot is a mass.
233
00:09:39,935 --> 00:09:42,036
A mass? Can you be more specific?
234
00:09:42,061 --> 00:09:43,935
- Is it a tumor?
- We don't know.
235
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,122
What do you mean you don't
know? You're a doctor.
236
00:09:46,148 --> 00:09:47,547
I'm not comfortable guessing.
237
00:09:47,583 --> 00:09:49,910
- Maybe it's your twin.
- It's not a twin.
238
00:09:49,935 --> 00:09:51,335
That does happen.
239
00:09:51,450 --> 00:09:53,920
Y... you know what, could
you maybe wait outside?
240
00:09:53,956 --> 00:09:55,208
Yep.
241
00:09:56,841 --> 00:09:59,089
So, this mass... what do we do?
242
00:09:59,114 --> 00:10:01,328
Do we run some more
tests? Do we wait it out?
243
00:10:01,363 --> 00:10:03,106
We'd actually like to remove it.
244
00:10:03,131 --> 00:10:04,564
Immediately.
245
00:10:04,833 --> 00:10:07,169
- Today?
- Well, you could wait,
246
00:10:07,194 --> 00:10:10,521
but most people don't roll
the dice on brain stuff.
247
00:10:10,906 --> 00:10:13,940
248
00:10:15,247 --> 00:10:17,513
[Sighs] Okay. I got this.
249
00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:19,012
Uh...
250
00:10:20,567 --> 00:10:21,747
all righty...
251
00:10:21,772 --> 00:10:22,872
[Buzzes]
252
00:10:22,897 --> 00:10:24,568
Computer voice: Warning...
you are about to replace
253
00:10:24,593 --> 00:10:26,247
this subject's memory permanently.
254
00:10:26,272 --> 00:10:28,567
- Do you want to save?
- Nope!
255
00:10:30,192 --> 00:10:32,521
Commencing defragmentation.
256
00:10:33,192 --> 00:10:34,661
[Beeps]
257
00:10:36,591 --> 00:10:39,166
[Monitor beeping]
258
00:10:39,201 --> 00:10:41,601
259
00:10:41,637 --> 00:10:44,411
Goodbye, 28409's mind.
260
00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:47,040
All your memories will be lost.
261
00:10:47,075 --> 00:10:48,175
Pity.
262
00:10:48,210 --> 00:10:50,794
263
00:10:52,570 --> 00:10:53,869
[Powers down, siren wails]
264
00:10:53,894 --> 00:10:54,997
Signal lost.
265
00:10:55,177 --> 00:10:58,810
Signal lost? How? What?
266
00:10:58,835 --> 00:11:00,001
Ahh!
267
00:11:00,366 --> 00:11:03,847
Why?! You piece of crap!
268
00:11:03,872 --> 00:11:05,492
Gerry: Hey, bud.
269
00:11:05,527 --> 00:11:07,194
I was here the whole time.
270
00:11:07,229 --> 00:11:08,981
- How you feelin'?
- Gerry.
271
00:11:09,013 --> 00:11:11,380
I'm pretty groggy.
272
00:11:11,405 --> 00:11:12,966
Doctor: Mr. Graham, you're up.
273
00:11:13,008 --> 00:11:14,606
- Your operation went very well.
- Yeah.
274
00:11:14,631 --> 00:11:16,685
You'll be glad to know
it was not a tumor.
275
00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,605
- Great. What was it?
- Well, it's funny...
276
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:20,774
it didn't appear as a
foreign object on your skin,
277
00:11:20,809 --> 00:11:22,935
but it seems to be a
tiny piece of metal.
278
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:24,044
- Metal?
- Metal?
279
00:11:24,079 --> 00:11:26,122
I said the same thing. I've
never seen anything like it.
280
00:11:26,147 --> 00:11:28,582
It's, uh, a very uniform.
281
00:11:29,419 --> 00:11:33,489
Wait. How did this get into this?
282
00:11:33,514 --> 00:11:35,200
I can think of one reason.
283
00:11:36,592 --> 00:11:38,091
[Whispering] Aliens.
284
00:11:38,126 --> 00:11:39,708
Boop.
285
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:45,935
"What does it mean if I
get a signal lost error?"
286
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:47,724
"Subject removed the chip."
287
00:11:49,106 --> 00:11:51,138
How could he remove the chip?
288
00:11:53,021 --> 00:11:54,380
[Sniffs]
289
00:11:55,059 --> 00:11:56,115
What are you doing?
290
00:11:56,140 --> 00:11:57,878
I don't want to contaminate
it by touching it.
291
00:11:57,903 --> 00:12:00,519
Smells weird... like glass. [Sniffs]
292
00:12:00,544 --> 00:12:04,301
How did a piece of metal
get stuck in my head?
293
00:12:04,326 --> 00:12:05,759
It has to be aliens.
294
00:12:05,794 --> 00:12:07,427
But why? Mind control?
295
00:12:07,463 --> 00:12:09,329
We should take it to a lab.
296
00:12:09,365 --> 00:12:10,731
They probably have one here.
297
00:12:10,766 --> 00:12:12,165
But can we trust them?
298
00:12:12,201 --> 00:12:15,044
How long do you think it
would take to drive to NASA?
299
00:12:15,371 --> 00:12:17,692
But can we trust them?
300
00:12:17,940 --> 00:12:21,241
[Sighs] Pick up, pick up! Pick up!
301
00:12:21,276 --> 00:12:23,276
- [Coffee machine whirs, phone vibrates]
- Don:
Kelly likes coffee
302
00:12:23,312 --> 00:12:25,245
I'm making coffee
303
00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:27,919
Coffee, coffee,
coffee, coffee, co...
304
00:12:27,944 --> 00:12:29,716
God, useless!
305
00:12:30,552 --> 00:12:32,452
He removed the chip?!
306
00:12:32,488 --> 00:12:35,106
I might need you to retrieve it.
307
00:12:36,224 --> 00:12:39,122
Oh, wait, I'm sorry, Jeff.
I-I couldn't hear you.
308
00:12:39,147 --> 00:12:41,161
I might need you to retrieve the chip,
309
00:12:41,196 --> 00:12:43,271
if you care about evidence
of our existence lying around.
310
00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:46,653
Wait, you, the great Jeff
need help from lowly me?
311
00:12:46,678 --> 00:12:48,372
Okay, can we not do this?
312
00:12:48,397 --> 00:12:51,204
I'll offer you my
help if you ask nicely.
313
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:52,857
Repeat after me...
314
00:12:52,889 --> 00:12:54,915
- "Jonathan"...
- Jonathan...
315
00:12:54,943 --> 00:12:56,669
... "I'm a slimy, little bitch."
316
00:12:56,694 --> 00:12:58,247
- I'm not saying that.
- I'm not helping you.
317
00:12:58,272 --> 00:12:59,846
I'm a slimy little bitch.
318
00:12:59,882 --> 00:13:02,802
- "Please get the chip."
- Please get the chip.
319
00:13:02,827 --> 00:13:04,474
I didn't like your
tone. Let's try it again.
320
00:13:04,499 --> 00:13:05,911
- Just do it!
- All right, Jeff,
321
00:13:05,936 --> 00:13:08,646
I'll save you and the invasion, again.
322
00:13:08,671 --> 00:13:09,693
[Phone hangs up]
323
00:13:09,718 --> 00:13:11,716
His hapless bearded
friend Gerry called today,
324
00:13:11,741 --> 00:13:13,060
said he was at the hospital.
325
00:13:13,095 --> 00:13:14,481
I'm on it.
326
00:13:15,268 --> 00:13:16,901
[Knocks at door]
327
00:13:18,575 --> 00:13:20,308
- Hi!
- Hi.
328
00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:22,542
I don't want to interrupt
your crossword puzzle.
329
00:13:22,567 --> 00:13:24,848
Actually, I'm working on my homily.
330
00:13:25,161 --> 00:13:27,541
Well, um, I just wanted
to touch base with you
331
00:13:27,576 --> 00:13:28,875
about the, um...
332
00:13:28,911 --> 00:13:30,497
[Clears throat] the last class.
333
00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:32,566
I feel like things
maybe got a little weird.
334
00:13:32,591 --> 00:13:34,606
- Did they get weird? Did you feel that?
- Well, I... [Sighs]
335
00:13:34,631 --> 00:13:37,333
I mean, you somehow managed
to steal the spotlight
336
00:13:37,358 --> 00:13:39,152
away from the mother of God.
337
00:13:39,188 --> 00:13:41,700
I feel badly about that, but, um...
338
00:13:41,725 --> 00:13:44,458
see, something unexplainable
happened to Mary,
339
00:13:44,493 --> 00:13:46,927
and something unexplainable
happened to me,
340
00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:49,200
and I guess I was just really excited
341
00:13:49,225 --> 00:13:52,278
to... talk to you about it.
342
00:13:52,303 --> 00:13:54,075
And the enthusiasm was great,
343
00:13:54,107 --> 00:13:56,356
just not super
appropriate for that crowd.
344
00:13:56,381 --> 00:13:58,192
Yeah, sorry. I think I...
345
00:13:58,217 --> 00:13:59,630
I thought this was a book
346
00:13:59,655 --> 00:14:01,966
about explaining that kind of thing.
347
00:14:05,146 --> 00:14:07,724
Don't worry. I won't be
coming back to Bible Study.
348
00:14:12,747 --> 00:14:14,808
- [Coffee machine whirs]
- [Mid-tempo music plays]
349
00:14:14,833 --> 00:14:16,646
Karl: You're having a
hard time connecting to me.
350
00:14:16,671 --> 00:14:19,091
Have you ever considered the fact that
you're the one who's hard to connect to?
351
00:14:19,116 --> 00:14:21,127
No, I haven't, actually.
352
00:14:21,163 --> 00:14:23,114
So, I guess we're canceling
our trip to Ore-gone.
353
00:14:23,139 --> 00:14:24,763
- It's Oregon.
- What?
354
00:14:24,788 --> 00:14:26,741
It's pronounced "Oregon."
355
00:14:26,766 --> 00:14:28,967
- Uh, well, it's not actually.
- Yeah, it is.
356
00:14:28,992 --> 00:14:31,271
And I kind of can't believe that you're
correcting my pronunciation right now.
357
00:14:31,306 --> 00:14:33,840
It's just... it's a thing
with me, okay? Sorry.
358
00:14:33,876 --> 00:14:35,442
Goodbye, Karl.
359
00:14:36,780 --> 00:14:39,412
You're a nice person. I
hope you figure it out.
360
00:14:39,448 --> 00:14:41,983
361
00:14:44,356 --> 00:14:45,689
[Door closes]
362
00:14:45,714 --> 00:14:47,414
[Exhales sharply]
363
00:14:53,095 --> 00:14:56,251
I couldn't help but overhear everything.
364
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:58,782
- You were listening?
- Yeah.
365
00:14:59,301 --> 00:15:01,735
That's weird. Mind your own business.
366
00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:04,738
Oh, I made you this.
367
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:07,541
Oh, um, I made you this.
368
00:15:07,776 --> 00:15:09,910
I don't know what that means.
369
00:15:09,945 --> 00:15:12,512
I'm just gonna leave that there for you.
370
00:15:12,548 --> 00:15:14,314
Thank you.
371
00:15:16,652 --> 00:15:18,305
What the...
372
00:15:18,330 --> 00:15:22,743
Hey, Gerry, I think it
was alien technology.
373
00:15:23,821 --> 00:15:27,227
- What?
- Why's that so hard for me to say?
374
00:15:28,110 --> 00:15:30,813
I don't like it, but I'm owning it.
375
00:15:30,838 --> 00:15:33,157
Yeah. Own it, buddy.
376
00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:35,493
You're my best friend.
377
00:15:36,793 --> 00:15:38,516
I'm tired.
378
00:15:48,824 --> 00:15:51,934
Okay, buddy, I'm gonna
go to the loo. [Smooches]
379
00:15:51,959 --> 00:15:55,193
[Indistinct conversations]
380
00:16:11,489 --> 00:16:14,724
381
00:16:19,414 --> 00:16:21,014
Oh, hey. Who are you?
382
00:16:21,049 --> 00:16:23,917
- Ozzie's co-worker Nancy.
- That's cool.
383
00:16:24,458 --> 00:16:27,120
- Jonathan sends his regards.
- Jonathan, huh?
384
00:16:27,155 --> 00:16:28,321
Couldn't make it down himself?
385
00:16:28,357 --> 00:16:30,457
I thought he was Ozzie's best friend.
386
00:16:31,489 --> 00:16:33,544
I've been here all night long.
387
00:16:33,569 --> 00:16:35,606
Ozzie just said I was his best friend.
388
00:16:35,631 --> 00:16:37,114
I can see he's sleeping.
389
00:16:37,139 --> 00:16:38,382
I'll be on my way.
390
00:16:39,023 --> 00:16:40,535
Sleeping like a baby.
391
00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,493
I'll tell him you dropped by.
392
00:16:46,153 --> 00:16:48,508
- Where's the metal?
- Ozzie: What's going on, Gerry?
393
00:16:48,543 --> 00:16:49,965
Where is it?
394
00:16:50,598 --> 00:16:51,659
Where is what?
395
00:16:51,684 --> 00:16:53,512
Where's the tray... the vial?
396
00:16:53,537 --> 00:16:54,730
The tray's not there!
397
00:16:54,755 --> 00:16:57,723
Oh, yeah. The vial's gone.
398
00:16:57,748 --> 00:16:59,285
- Help!
- Help.
399
00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:00,465
Ohh!
400
00:17:00,965 --> 00:17:02,364
Hey, when this is over,
401
00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:05,315
I'm gonna write a book all about this,
402
00:17:05,340 --> 00:17:06,640
and you're gonna be in it.
403
00:17:06,675 --> 00:17:08,965
I would really be interested
in hearing about this, buddy,
404
00:17:08,990 --> 00:17:10,577
but we're in DEFCON 5.
405
00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:13,848
406
00:17:28,398 --> 00:17:30,565
[TV plays, Cellphone rings]
407
00:17:30,599 --> 00:17:31,998
Yeah?
408
00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:34,672
No, I'm not doing anything.
I can talk numbers.
409
00:17:35,132 --> 00:17:37,592
Okay, 80% LTV origination...
410
00:17:37,617 --> 00:17:39,490
- it's what's called a tier 2 loan.
- [Ringtone chimes]
411
00:17:39,515 --> 00:17:41,508
In tier 2, the max LTV on a supplemental
412
00:17:41,550 --> 00:17:43,383
- is 70% of the new value.
- _
413
00:17:43,412 --> 00:17:46,913
- [Romantic music plays]
- Also, just saw a 76-unit CDL 80k.
414
00:17:46,949 --> 00:17:49,116
No, no, no. Yeah, no.
415
00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:51,551
I'm not sure where we got 470k.
416
00:17:51,587 --> 00:17:54,554
417
00:17:54,590 --> 00:17:56,889
Doug: Our everyday life
418
00:17:56,914 --> 00:17:59,960
is filled with chores and errands
419
00:17:59,995 --> 00:18:03,230
that people 100, even 50 years ago
420
00:18:03,265 --> 00:18:04,564
couldn't comprehend.
421
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:06,443
Moses saw the burning bush.
422
00:18:06,468 --> 00:18:08,001
The disciples had to tell people
423
00:18:08,036 --> 00:18:10,209
that they saw Jesus rise from the dead.
424
00:18:10,234 --> 00:18:13,874
And Mary had to tell her
husband that she was pregnant
425
00:18:13,909 --> 00:18:15,776
even though she was still a virgin.
426
00:18:15,811 --> 00:18:16,977
That's a tall order.
427
00:18:17,012 --> 00:18:19,061
We can see stars from here
428
00:18:19,086 --> 00:18:22,139
Doug: Sometimes God makes us
witnesses to the unexplainable.
429
00:18:22,164 --> 00:18:25,398
430
00:18:25,961 --> 00:18:28,154
Why would we go back anyway?
431
00:18:28,179 --> 00:18:30,467
Doug: Imagine carrying the
burden of having experienced
432
00:18:30,492 --> 00:18:32,959
an impossible event.
433
00:18:32,995 --> 00:18:35,896
Could you, could I? I don't know.
434
00:18:35,931 --> 00:18:39,545
Uh, most of us will never
be tested in that way.
435
00:18:39,570 --> 00:18:41,654
But those that we celebrate today,
436
00:18:41,690 --> 00:18:43,273
they held firm.
437
00:18:43,298 --> 00:18:47,476
They never wavered, even when
those around them wouldn't listen.
438
00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:50,273
That's courage.
439
00:18:50,298 --> 00:18:51,468
That's faith.
440
00:18:51,554 --> 00:18:54,289
441
00:18:57,656 --> 00:18:58,822
- Metal?
- Metal?
442
00:18:58,857 --> 00:19:01,334
- What you mean, Metal"?
- Like a microphone.
443
00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:03,192
It was metal... perfectly shaped,
444
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:04,260
like a little circle.
445
00:19:04,295 --> 00:19:05,361
Alien technology.
446
00:19:05,396 --> 00:19:06,583
They put it in his head.
447
00:19:06,608 --> 00:19:08,664
The doctor didn't know
448
00:19:08,700 --> 00:19:10,833
how it got there or what it was.
449
00:19:11,048 --> 00:19:14,529
Dude, you admitted yourself
it was alien technology...
450
00:19:14,554 --> 00:19:16,472
in the room, after surgery.
451
00:19:16,507 --> 00:19:18,819
I don't remember that. I
mean, I was pretty high.
452
00:19:18,844 --> 00:19:22,111
It was like Snoop Dogg, Willie Nelson,
453
00:19:22,146 --> 00:19:24,013
Wiz Khalifa barbecue high.
454
00:19:24,048 --> 00:19:26,882
No, you said it. I was there.
455
00:19:26,918 --> 00:19:28,552
And you said you were
gonna write a book about it,
456
00:19:28,577 --> 00:19:30,152
and that I was your best friend.
457
00:19:30,188 --> 00:19:33,007
Okay, Gerry, please don't
put words in Ozzie's mouth.
458
00:19:33,032 --> 00:19:34,108
- Okay?
- What, I'm not.
459
00:19:34,133 --> 00:19:35,889
People do crazy things
when they're high.
460
00:19:35,914 --> 00:19:37,718
I took generic feline Ativan last year,
461
00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:39,895
and I bought five pairs of jeans online.
462
00:19:40,186 --> 00:19:42,665
Okay, I... okay...
Where is the metal now?
463
00:19:42,700 --> 00:19:43,818
Where is the metal?
464
00:19:43,843 --> 00:19:45,364
A nurse walked away with it.
465
00:19:45,389 --> 00:19:47,098
We think a nurse took it.
466
00:19:47,123 --> 00:19:49,371
- Reptilian?
- It was a nurse.
467
00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:51,207
I don't even go to doctors.
468
00:19:51,242 --> 00:19:53,309
Ozzie, how are you feeling?
469
00:19:53,344 --> 00:19:55,311
Can... can you describe
how you're feeling?
470
00:19:55,346 --> 00:19:56,396
Sure.
471
00:19:56,421 --> 00:19:59,709
Yesterday there was something in
my head, and today there's not.
472
00:20:00,053 --> 00:20:02,985
So I guess I feel pretty okay.
473
00:20:03,020 --> 00:20:04,857
Dude, just admit it! It was aliens!
474
00:20:04,922 --> 00:20:06,088
Calm down.
475
00:20:06,124 --> 00:20:08,190
You said it! It was alien technology!
476
00:20:08,226 --> 00:20:10,762
Just... just... just say
it! You admitted it before.
477
00:20:10,787 --> 00:20:11,894
We're not leaving till you say it.
478
00:20:11,929 --> 00:20:13,996
You know what, leave us
out of it, okay, Gerry?
479
00:20:14,031 --> 00:20:16,599
- We weren't there.
- Okay, you know what? Fine.
480
00:20:16,634 --> 00:20:19,264
- I'll say this...
- Yes.
481
00:20:19,289 --> 00:20:23,124
Something happened to me,
and it was unexplainable.
482
00:20:23,374 --> 00:20:25,708
And... sure, why not?
483
00:20:25,743 --> 00:20:28,077
It could have been aliens. Fine.
484
00:20:28,112 --> 00:20:30,239
We can check this one off in the box
485
00:20:30,264 --> 00:20:32,684
- for the alien-believing column.
- All right!
486
00:20:32,709 --> 00:20:35,614
But it also could have
been the tooth fairy,
487
00:20:35,639 --> 00:20:39,054
because we have no
physical, actual proof.
488
00:20:39,090 --> 00:20:40,923
Whatever. I'll take it.
489
00:20:43,528 --> 00:20:45,551
I called you seven times.
490
00:20:45,576 --> 00:20:48,286
- Where were you?
- It's been a very busy day.
491
00:20:48,311 --> 00:20:50,004
- Did you find the car?
- No.
492
00:20:50,029 --> 00:20:52,063
What do you mean "No"? You had all day.
493
00:20:53,247 --> 00:20:55,181
You... you answer the
phone when I call you!
494
00:20:55,206 --> 00:20:57,162
[Bangs on door] You hear me?!
495
00:20:57,436 --> 00:20:59,008
Mm! Ah!
496
00:20:59,043 --> 00:21:00,904
Uh! Wha!
497
00:21:03,014 --> 00:21:05,848
Loser, loser, winner, winner!
498
00:21:07,485 --> 00:21:09,418
Here's your trophy.
499
00:21:12,156 --> 00:21:15,391
[Suspenseful music plays]
500
00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:25,929
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
501
00:21:25,979 --> 00:21:30,529
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
35716
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof