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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,999
I could be handcuffed and suspended
in a block of ice. Mmm.
2
00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:07,759
That's a lot of work
for a school talent competition.
3
00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:08,799
Yes.
4
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,759
It's great you're taking part.
5
00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:13,519
Yes. Stupid machine.
6
00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:16,279
Or I could do the magic trick
I did with Gran.
7
00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:19,399
Her face when she thought I'd
smashed her watch with that hammer!
8
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:20,639
Well, you had.
9
00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:23,479
Yeah. Still don't know
what went wrong there. Yes.
10
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:26,839
I think it was the wrong
kind of hammer. No, I said "yes".
11
00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:29,519
Still, Gran likes her new watch.
12
00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:30,879
I'm not wearing them!
13
00:00:30,880 --> 00:00:34,599
Karen, if both socks have got
a hole in them, then they match.
14
00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,079
Just put them on! Oh.
15
00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:37,479
I didn't say "no."
16
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:41,199
Yeah, just now.
You said, "No, I said 'yes'".
17
00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:42,559
No. Yes, yes!
18
00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:45,719
I could sing. (AS LOUIS ARMSTONG)
♪ And I think to myself...♪
19
00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:47,079
Go back.
20
00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:49,759
♪ What a wonderful world. ♪
Go back.
21
00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:52,639
The only disadvantage to singing
is that you can't.
22
00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:55,280
I've got tons of other ideas.
23
00:00:57,560 --> 00:00:59,199
Impractical.
24
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,119
Illegal.
25
00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:02,479
Suicidal.
26
00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:06,119
Ben, you don't even know
what the Wall of Death is.
27
00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:08,439
Go back. Ooh, I know what I could do.
28
00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:11,199
I could do lion-taming
with Rottweilers.
29
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:14,359
You absolute...
Or juggling lobsters and crabs.
30
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:16,359
Or I could wrestle a bear.
31
00:01:16,360 --> 00:01:20,079
I just don't under... No-one would
get hurt because it'd be trained.
32
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,919
Where will you get a trained bear?
33
00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:25,079
You can obviously find them
on the Internet. Unbelievable.
34
00:01:25,080 --> 00:01:29,239
What about those kinda stunts?
I could hold my breath under water.
35
00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:32,160
Or you could not hold it
under water? And drown?!
36
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,920
KAREN HUMS
37
00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:43,799
If I tried sword-swallowing.
No. Or chain-saw swallowing.
38
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,119
But then they wouldn't let me do it.
I could do it with like a mop
39
00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:50,399
because I think the people that
clean up after have some of them.
40
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,159
So you're going to put a day's worth
of bacteria into your stomach?
41
00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:55,679
No, the wooden bit!
42
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:58,799
Accounts. That's worse.
The cleaners' hands have been on it.
43
00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:03,039
They're cleaners, they obviously
have clean hands. No-o.
44
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:05,359
Or I could have like a choir
of parrots.
45
00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:07,919
A choir. Of parrots?
46
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:11,839
KAREN HUMS:
"Hole In The Wall" theme
47
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:13,639
Bring on the wall!
48
00:02:13,640 --> 00:02:18,079
MAKES SOUND EFFECTS
49
00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:20,479
Ben! Teeth!
50
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:22,839
You shouldn't discourage him
like that.
51
00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:24,999
It's not good for his confidence.
52
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,919
Will it be good for his confidence when
the whole school laughs at him? DOORBELL
53
00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:31,279
Who's that? A man in a suit.
54
00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:35,839
See what he wants, and if he's
a cold caller just do your stuff!
55
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:37,119
OK.
56
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,599
Go ba... Oh, f...
57
00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:44,519
No, I do not want to start again.
58
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:49,039
I want to kill myself.
59
00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:52,920
Certainly. To kill myself!
60
00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:56,159
Hello. They're busy.
61
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:58,439
Um, can I speak to your mum or dad?
62
00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:00,639
You've just asked the question
I answered.
63
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:02,799
Mum and Dad don't speak
to cold callers.
64
00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:06,359
I'm not a cold caller.
Do we know you? No, but...
65
00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:09,199
Did we know you were going to call?
No, however...
66
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,919
I think that makes you
a cold caller.
67
00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:14,199
I think this competition
will be good for Ben.
68
00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:18,199
I'm worried about him settling in
at school. Well, that's good. Eh?
69
00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:21,759
Well, that'll stop you worrying
about Jake being up to something.
70
00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:25,519
Oh, God, Jake, yeah. Yeah, he
keeps putting up all these defences.
71
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:29,199
Well, maybe if you stop trying
to break into his Facebook page.
72
00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:32,559
You should give up. I'm not a cold
caller and this is very important.
73
00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:36,519
The lady from BT said that. Your mum
and dad are not going to be pleased
74
00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,799
when they realise you wouldn't let
me talk to them. She said that, too.
75
00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:41,760
Look, try the blue house over there.
76
00:03:41,761 --> 00:03:45,559
If you get there before her helper
arrives she'll buy anything.
77
00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,919
But he seems to have
this sixth sense.
78
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,119
Whichever teenage girl
I pretend to be, he spots it.
79
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:54,999
And I'm using all the current slang
and everything.
80
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:59,199
Yeah, you're right,
I need to chillax. Chillax?
81
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:01,879
He's pretty low-maintenance
for a 15-year-old boy.
82
00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:03,160
He's got nice friends.
83
00:04:03,161 --> 00:04:04,839
Jake's got loads of friends.
84
00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:08,559
Big kids come up to me and say,
"You're Jailbait's brother.
85
00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:12,799
"His band's really cool." Can I
have a mini eclair? Jailbait?
86
00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:15,879
Yeah, that's his nickname. Can I
have a mini eclair? Jail... bait?
87
00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,639
Yeah. You've asked that twice.
Can I have a mini eclair?
88
00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:20,479
No. Why's that his nickname?
89
00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:22,799
I don't know. I mean,
why am I called Casualty?
90
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:24,959
Or Ouch, or The Destructonator.
91
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:29,199
I'm not called that, but I'd like
to be. Can I have a mini eclair?
92
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:30,680
No. Get ready for school.
93
00:04:30,681 --> 00:04:34,799
Is eating caterpillars a talent?
Only if you're a bird.
94
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:39,039
Well, Karen, I can see you are a
clever little girl who isn't going
95
00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:41,839
to let me talk to your mum
and dad, but perhaps you could
96
00:04:41,840 --> 00:04:44,479
let me have a little chat
with Angela Bollinger.
97
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:46,159
Who's that?
98
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,640
Your mum's sister, Angela.
99
00:04:47,641 --> 00:04:50,319
Auntie Angela is staying with you,
isn't she? No.
100
00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,759
She comes about once a year
101
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:55,679
and then they smile at each other
for a bit,
102
00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:58,519
and then they shout at each other
for a bit.
103
00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:00,440
Once, Mum kicked her up the bottom.
104
00:05:00,441 --> 00:05:03,839
But now she's married this man
with a silly name that I forget.
105
00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:05,679
Look, this is very important.
106
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,719
I'm bored now.
107
00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:10,719
OK, just take my card.
108
00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:14,759
Tell your mum or dad it's vital
they ring me, mmm?
109
00:05:14,760 --> 00:05:16,800
Foot.
110
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:23,999
Look, I think it may be best if we
don't actually ask Jake about this.
111
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,839
No, you're right.
112
00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:29,639
Because it's not like he's going to
tell you. No, no, you're right.
113
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:34,119
Oh, God, kids these days just grow
up so quickly, that's the prob...
114
00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:36,159
Has someone moved
my science homework?
115
00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:37,560
Why are you called Jailbait?
116
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:40,919
What? Why is that your nickname?
117
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:43,559
Mum, Dad... Not now, Karen.
118
00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:46,919
It's just a name, that's all,
and it's none of your business.
119
00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:50,399
But, Dad.
Just get ready for school, now!
120
00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:53,319
And I...
Dad, are cabbages flammable?
121
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:56,279
Why? Just an idea
for the talent contest, bye!
122
00:05:56,280 --> 00:06:00,599
Why are you called Jailbait?
I need to go to school.
123
00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:03,199
I knew he wouldn't answer.
124
00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:06,039
I just wanted to learn from the WAY
he didn't answer.
125
00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:07,200
What did you learn?
126
00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:12,760
If you're not going to work, could you
attack that ironing please? Karen! School!
127
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:17,559
If I filled the freezer with water,
how big an ice cube could I make?
128
00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:19,799
Will you just forget
the David Blaine thing?
129
00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:23,599
You need something
practical for the talent show.
130
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,519
I checked some things on the
Internet. I saw - fire-eating.
131
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,999
I'm not doing that,
132
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,519
some kids in my class
have some weird phobia of fire.
133
00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:33,519
Yes.
134
00:06:33,520 --> 00:06:35,559
Well, we know why that is, don't we?
135
00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:37,039
It turned out OK.
136
00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:41,239
Mr Hunslet said he'd got bored of
having eyebrows. I like Mr Hunslet.
137
00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:44,759
Maybe I could be a comedian
and I could, like, tell jokes.
138
00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:46,679
No, Ben, that...
139
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:48,719
Actually, that's quite a good idea.
140
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,879
DOORBELL
141
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:52,759
Where's Karen when you need her?
142
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:55,719
Everyone laughed a lot when
I farted at Uncle Bob's funeral.
143
00:06:55,720 --> 00:06:57,519
Yeah, well, that was funny.
144
00:06:57,520 --> 00:06:59,839
Though it was the echo
as much as anything.
145
00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:02,880
And I've got this joke book.
A joke book? That sounds great.
146
00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:06,280
Hi, Pete.
147
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,480
Angela.
148
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:10,719
Hello.
149
00:07:10,720 --> 00:07:13,119
Hi. I brought Misty with me.
150
00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:15,680
And some baggage. Luggage.
151
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:23,439
Aren't you going to ask us in?
Yes, of course.
152
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:25,839
Is Brick with you?
Not this time.
153
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:28,840
So, you won't get to shove each
other in the chest in a car park.
154
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:34,599
Hi, Ben! Uh-oh!
155
00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:37,199
Ben. Does Mum know you're coming?
156
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:40,679
Ben, say hello.
Hello, Auntie Angela.
157
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:44,679
DOES Sue know you're coming? Er...
Or is this just a lovely surprise?
158
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:48,839
To be honest, Pete,
we're in a bit of a situation.
159
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:52,239
Our hotel room was double booked.
Every single place we tried was full
160
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:55,559
and this is Misty's
first ever night in Europe.
161
00:07:55,560 --> 00:08:01,199
We wondered if maybe we could
stay with you, just for one night?
162
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:05,439
Just one night.
I'm sure that would be...
163
00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:06,879
nice.
164
00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:09,839
A skeleton walks into a pub
and says,
165
00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:11,640
"I'll have a pint of lager
and a mop."
166
00:08:11,641 --> 00:08:15,439
He's going to be a comedian
in the school talent show.
167
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,919
It's funny because he's a skeleton,
so when he drinks the lager,
168
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:22,959
it'll go right through him and then
he needs the mop to clean it up.
169
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,879
Do you get it? Yeah, I get it.
We had a really rough...
170
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:29,119
There's a skeleton
and he goes in to a pub
171
00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,719
and says, "I'll have
a pint of lager and a mop."
172
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,679
Look, do you get it or not?
Because you're still not laughing.
173
00:08:35,680 --> 00:08:39,439
Ben! OK, well, this skeleton,
he doesn't have a stomach... Ben!
174
00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:42,679
or a bladder, or anything
like that. And he knows this.
175
00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:45,040
I expect you've got
some homework. No.
176
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:48,200
Uh-oh...
177
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,039
So, Misty, would you like a drink?
I've got Coke.
178
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,999
No, thank you,
I suffer from personal gas.
179
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,999
Right. Well, I've got tea, coffee.
180
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:04,919
All the drinks you pour water onto,
that don't give you gas.
181
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:08,639
No, thank you. So, Pete,
you're a house-husband now?
182
00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:10,439
No, I'm supply teaching. I just...
183
00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:13,919
It's OK, don't feel emasculated.
I think it's marvellous. I don't...
184
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,879
So, Auntie, how's things?
185
00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:20,919
Terrific, thanks, Jake.
I've become a writer. A writer?
186
00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,439
They want to publish my book.
187
00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:26,159
I'm meeting an editor here in London
and Misty wanted to see Europe.
188
00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:27,600
Oh, Jesus.
189
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:32,439
Hi, Karen! This is Misty.
Is Mum with you?
190
00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:36,399
No, I ran ahead.
Does she know you're here? Karen!
191
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:40,079
It's a surprise. But it's not
going to be a nice surprise, though.
192
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,959
Cos you just fight.
193
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:43,879
Don't be silly, we won't fight.
194
00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:47,959
I'm going to my bedroom.
Call me when it's all over.
195
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:50,159
So, this book. Is it a novel?
196
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:54,839
No, Pete, it's a self-help book. It
gives advice on surviving families.
197
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:57,159
So it's, it's you...
198
00:09:57,160 --> 00:10:02,559
giving advice about families
to other people.
199
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:06,440
I've finally understood
that my pain was a gift.
200
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:08,799
Hello!
201
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:11,239
That's Sue... I'll just...
202
00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:15,199
Sue... Jake is going out
with a 19-year-old.
203
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:19,279
Angela's here. What, you let her in?
19? One-nine?
204
00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:21,599
She can't stay.
I said she could stay the night.
205
00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:25,639
How do you know? I finally conned
my way on to his Facebook page.
206
00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:29,399
What the bloody hell is Angela
doing here? She's written a book.
207
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:33,159
19? So this girl's... A book?
four years older than him?
208
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:36,519
What kind of book? Hey! Did you hear
about the cowboy who wore
209
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:39,879
a paper hat, shirt and trousers?
He was found guilty of rustling.
210
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,039
Not now, Ben. What is rustling?
211
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:44,639
Ben, go! He's going to be a comedian.
212
00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:46,799
19! Angela!
213
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:48,880
No violence now, Mum.
214
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,519
19. Can you stop saying that?
215
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:56,760
Hi, Sue! Aren't you going to come in
and say hello to your sister?
216
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:01,719
So, let me get this straight.
217
00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:08,319
You're giving advice on families
to other people. Yes, I am.
218
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:12,399
She finally understood
her pain was a gift.
219
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:13,759
DOORBELL
220
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:16,919
Karen! Door! I've found this
really good joke on Twitter.
221
00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:20,399
It's a Frankie Boyle joke.
I'm going to stop you right there.
222
00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,399
Well, I've already told it to Misty.
Did she laugh?
223
00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:28,559
She made some noises. I wouldn't
really call it laughing as such.
224
00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:30,279
Ben! It's for you!
225
00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:33,079
So, does this book
draw on our family?
226
00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:36,439
A tiny bit, but enough of me
and my writing.
227
00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:40,559
I hear you've got some secretarial
work? I never said secre...
228
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:44,119
I run an office at a
multimedia interconnect company.
229
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:47,999
They provide connectivity solutions
for different types of media.
230
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:51,160
But what exactly... I run
the office, I don't know, OK?
231
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:56,879
And how's everything with Jake?
Has he got a girlfriend yet?
232
00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:58,639
Well... Yeah, there are rumours.
233
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:01,879
But you haven't had the big day when
you meet her for the first time?
234
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:05,759
No, but that big day
will be coming soon.
235
00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,039
Will it? Yes. Yes, it will.
236
00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:12,879
What the...?
That was Ibrahim at the door.
237
00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,479
He's given me to Ben.
238
00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,159
I was in his attic
and they didn't want me.
239
00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:21,439
His grandmother said I was the work
of the devil. He's horrible. Ben!
240
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,200
Rah!
SUE SCREAMS
241
00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:27,399
So, I'm going to do my act
and then you've got to heckle me,
242
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:29,039
so I can practise my put-downs.
243
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:30,639
Well, we are quite tired.
244
00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,239
OK, just do your best.
245
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,319
Knock knock.
246
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:35,839
Who's there?
247
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,519
Dwayne. Dwayne who?
248
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,880
Dwain the bathtub - I'm dwowning.
249
00:12:42,440 --> 00:12:45,839
You haven't heckled me yet.
You're rubbish.
250
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:48,239
Erm...
251
00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:49,799
OK, sorry. The...
252
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:53,079
The heckling stuff is at the back.
253
00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:54,599
Erm...
254
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,559
Erm...
255
00:12:56,560 --> 00:12:57,840
Erm...
256
00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,760
Are you wearing those clothes
for a bet?
257
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,359
I find him very disturbing.
258
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:19,999
Oh, it's all right, sweetie,
he's only a dummy made of wood.
259
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:24,119
No, the boy.
260
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,399
Who did your make-up? A clown?
Oh, that's charming.
261
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:30,039
No, I just don't think
we should rush up to him and say,
262
00:13:30,040 --> 00:13:33,279
"So, you've got
a 19-year-old girlfriend".
263
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:36,319
Every time you say,
"19-year-old girlfriend",
264
00:13:36,320 --> 00:13:39,319
you've got a bit of a grin
on your face.
265
00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:40,799
No, I haven't!
266
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:43,319
It's illegal.
Well, only technically.
267
00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:45,719
No, not technically...
Only if they're...
268
00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:48,039
Do you think he's got
a 19-year-old girlfriend
269
00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:51,559
and they're reading poetry to...
You're doing the grin again!
270
00:13:51,560 --> 00:13:52,599
No, I'm not!
271
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:58,359
I will now recite the alphabet
whilst drinking this glass of water.
272
00:13:58,360 --> 00:13:59,880
I think we've had enough.
273
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,759
A, B, C,
274
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:09,639
D, E... Ben... F, G, H...
275
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,439
Ben, I think YOU'RE
supposed to drink the water.
276
00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:15,039
What? I think YOU'RE
supposed to drink the water.
277
00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:17,959
But I'm not thirsty. He is.
278
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:18,999
You are!
279
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:23,239
My face at rest just happens to look
like a bit of a grin, that's all.
280
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:24,720
You admire him, don't you? No.
281
00:14:24,721 --> 00:14:27,799
He's doing something you could
only dream of as a teenager.
282
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:31,639
OK, let's not forget you had a boyfriend
- a steady boyfriend - at 14,
283
00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:34,879
which is the equivalent
of about eight now.
284
00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:38,839
But he was 14, the same age as me.
I've seen the photo, he looks...
285
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:41,919
Well, look, how would you feel
if Karen was 15
286
00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:45,159
and had a 19-year-old boyfriend?
Well... You're not grinning now.
287
00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:48,559
Well, that would be different. Why?
Well, because... Because...
288
00:14:48,560 --> 00:14:50,520
Cos she's a girl.
I haven't said that.
289
00:14:50,521 --> 00:14:54,240
You haven't said anything yet. Why
is that different? Because... Yes?
290
00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:58,999
We'll have a word with Jake.
291
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:01,199
I wouldn't say
my mother-in-law is fat...
292
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:04,639
Oh, Ben, please, no jokes
about people with weight issues.
293
00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:08,239
but every time she goes
swimming... she gets harpooned.
294
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,639
People who have had weight issues...
Well, it's not me saying it.
295
00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:14,759
People find jokes like that
offensive. Yeah, I agree with you.
296
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,799
This is quite offensive. But
I'm not the one saying it, he is.
297
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:21,519
Don't join their side, you traitor.
You're being mean about fat people.
298
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:24,639
Rot in hell,
you back-stabbing traitor.
299
00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:26,599
SUE KNOCKS
Jake.
300
00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:27,999
What?!
301
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,279
Jake!
302
00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,039
I'm in the middle
of a maths problem.
303
00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:35,039
Well...
how's this for a maths problem?
304
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:38,679
19 plus 15 equals a crime.
305
00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:40,799
What are you talking about?
306
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:44,319
You and this 19-year-old girl,
it's a crime. A crime?
307
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,719
Yes! She could be put on
the sex offenders' register.
308
00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:53,159
Whoa, cool it a bit, Mum.
Anyway, it's not her fault.
309
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:55,239
Well, I think you'll
find it IS her fault.
310
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:56,520
No, it's not...
311
00:15:56,521 --> 00:15:59,039
cos she thinks I'm 17. Why?
312
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,879
That's what I told her.
Well, she should have checked. What?
313
00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:04,119
Well... She, she...
314
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:08,599
She should have asked to see some
formal means of identification.
315
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:09,999
She did. What?
316
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,120
She's seen my ID.
317
00:16:11,121 --> 00:16:15,519
Well, you mean you've got fake ID
to say you're 17 years old?
318
00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:18,159
No, it says I'm 18. There's no point
in having a fake ID
319
00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:23,159
saying you're one year too young
to do anything. Right.
320
00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:25,500
Come on, Mum,
everyone's got fake ID.
321
00:16:25,501 --> 00:16:27,839
Dave's got one to say he's
got diplomatic immunity.
322
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:31,039
Jake... You're... You're just...
323
00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:33,759
You're not... Pete, why aren't
you saying anything?
324
00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:36,439
Because you're not leaving any gaps.
325
00:16:36,440 --> 00:16:40,679
But, Jake, your mum is right. This
girl, what's her name? Victoria.
326
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:42,839
And where does she live? In Ealing.
327
00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:44,839
Do you have any photographs of her?
328
00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:47,999
Well, that's not important, is it?
329
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,519
No.
330
00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:52,479
No, I'm not going in the box,
I'm not going in the box!
331
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,119
You are, you're going in the box.
332
00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:56,599
No, no, I'm not going in the box.
333
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,199
Don't ignore me,
I've got another joke.
334
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:00,959
We don't want to hear it.
335
00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:02,359
But this one's good
336
00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:03,999
and it's all about fat people.
337
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,279
Is this abnormal behaviour?
338
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:07,679
I have human rights.
339
00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:10,079
Not really. Not for him.
340
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:12,999
I think he's quietened down. Urgh!
341
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,919
Mum's four years younger than you.
342
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:17,319
Oh, come on! No, it's...
343
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,799
What is wrong with...
344
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:22,399
consorting with girls your own age?
345
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:25,479
Well, then I WOULD be doing
something illegal.
346
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:27,199
Would you? Would he?
347
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:30,479
Erm, I'm not sure...
But you Googled it.
348
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:34,639
I Googled "sex under 16"...
which was a mistake.
349
00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:40,559
Look, Jake, for a start, you've got
to tell this Victoria your real age.
350
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,599
Why? What are you going to do,
go to the police?
351
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,399
Yes! Maybe.
352
00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:48,279
That's just stupid.
That's the most... It's not stupid.
353
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:51,239
What will the police do?
It's me looking out for you.
354
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:54,719
Calm down, before someone says
something really unfortunate.
355
00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:57,519
She always goes mental
when Angela's around.
356
00:17:57,520 --> 00:17:59,039
Like that.
357
00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:01,919
I promise, honey,
everything's going to be just...
358
00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:04,879
Hi, sweetie. My, how you've grown.
359
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,359
Look, I don't want you
to sleep in my room,
360
00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:09,760
but seeing as you are,
here is a list of rules.
361
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:14,039
I'm not very likely
to wee in the bed.
362
00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:16,999
Auntie Maddy did. Really?
363
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:21,159
Yes, she had too much red wine.
She's a borderline alcoholic.
364
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:24,799
Is she?
She also broke rules six and eight.
365
00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:28,440
Sign in the box, please.
I don't see a box.
366
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:35,519
Of course, just below rule 27.
367
00:18:35,520 --> 00:18:39,479
But you haven't read them yet. Don't
sign something you haven't read.
368
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:43,720
That's how that woman got on
the wrong side of Rumpelstiltskin.
369
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,840
She doesn't have to sign
because she looks too sad.
370
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:55,120
Sue? I couldn't sleep.
371
00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:58,799
It's that band of Jake's
that's the problem.
372
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:02,599
You know what girls are like
around bands. What's that?
373
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,919
Oh, er, it's Angela's book.
374
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,680
Stumbled across it...
375
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:10,319
in her luggage. Right...
376
00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:13,719
Well, I stumbled across
the disc in her luggage...
377
00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,040
which I put back...
378
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,239
after I printed it out.
379
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:22,119
Right... Here, listen to this.
380
00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:26,959
"Some self-help books are Band-Aids,
some are bandages,
381
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:29,439
"this book is a portal."
382
00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:30,759
A portal?
383
00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:33,759
"A portal to take you back
to when the hurt happened.
384
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:37,359
"To let you relive
it in a healing way,
385
00:19:37,360 --> 00:19:41,359
"which will positivise your future.
Let me talk you through my past."
386
00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,159
"Talk to you through my arse"?
387
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:48,439
"In my family, my sister
was a mani... pulator."
388
00:19:48,440 --> 00:19:50,319
Maybe stop there.
389
00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:53,839
"She hooked my MOM
like a drug pusher,
390
00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:56,919
"gave her love
until she got used to it.
391
00:19:56,920 --> 00:20:00,879
"Then she took it away and forced
my MOM to buy it hit by hit."
392
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,000
Or... stop there?
393
00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:05,239
Mom! Mom! Sue...
394
00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:07,959
We didn't have a "Mom",
we had a bloody "Mum".
395
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:09,800
Let's not have a fight
with her about this.
396
00:20:09,801 --> 00:20:12,759
"She finally found the man
she'd been looking for.
397
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:17,119
"A weak but angry man,
who avoided all confrontation,
398
00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:20,079
"who she could hook
like she hooked MOM."
399
00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:22,919
"Weak and angry"?
And I avoid confrontation, do I?
400
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:26,519
Well, I tell you what, tomorrow
morning, at bloody breakfast...
401
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:29,439
Are you two fighting?
402
00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:31,959
No. No, sweetheart, come on.
403
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:36,999
Why are you awake at this
time of night? Are you sure?
404
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,520
Yeah. Really.
405
00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:46,599
We're not fighting.
We want to fight Auntie Angela.
406
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:47,679
A bit.
407
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:51,039
Why do families fight so much?
408
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:57,359
Well, they fight mostly because
they... they love each other.
409
00:20:57,360 --> 00:20:59,359
Did Henry VIII love Anne Boleyn?
410
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:03,679
Well, yes, in a sense, he loved her
too much, because he ended up...
411
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:06,519
Chopping her head off. Yes.
412
00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:09,359
In front of hundreds of people.
What about Richard III?
413
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:13,279
What about Richard III? He locked up
those princes so they starved and died.
414
00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:16,319
Come on. Come on, it's... Did they
actually love each other...?
415
00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:17,879
SHE SNEEZES
416
00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:19,319
Bless you.
417
00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:21,519
So why do families fight?
418
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:26,319
Listen, families are like democracy -
really rubbish,
419
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,279
but better than the alternatives.
420
00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:31,959
Do you want a carry upstairs,
for old time's sake? OK.
421
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,959
And don't worry about fighting.
Oh, I don't.
422
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,479
I like watching it.
423
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:40,119
So, the big fight's going
to be at breakfast?
424
00:21:40,120 --> 00:21:43,359
Er... yep.
425
00:21:43,360 --> 00:21:47,039
So, yeah, er, Dad.
This is how I'm going to do it, OK?
426
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:51,319
Hello, School!
He's Junior. "And he's Jen."
427
00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:53,839
I could see your lips moving. So?
428
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:55,959
You're not meant to
see your lips moving.
429
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:57,240
So close your eyes.
430
00:21:57,241 --> 00:21:59,159
And also, he called you "Jen".
431
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:02,639
Maybe he has a speech impediment.
He's a dummy. It's his own life!
432
00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:04,319
But I'm just trying to...
433
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:07,919
"Keep quiet, blondie!"
Don't talk about my sister that way.
434
00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,159
You're both dummies!
Why are you watching this?!
435
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:12,000
Hiya! Hiya.
436
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:20,639
Karen, go get dressed. Go on.
437
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:25,039
So, the book, much about me in it?
438
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:28,439
Not much, no,
the odd mention now and then.
439
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:32,160
What sort of mention?
A nice mention?
440
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:35,639
It's mostly affectionate.
441
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,560
It's just...
442
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:42,639
Ben, can you and Junior please
go get ready for school?
443
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:45,999
"That was your fault."
No, it wasn't, it was your fault.
444
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:49,119
Have got you any skimmed milk?
I find... You call me a drug pusher!
445
00:22:49,120 --> 00:22:51,319
You've read it!
446
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:53,240
You say I'm controlling,
small-minded.
447
00:22:53,241 --> 00:22:55,060
You got it out of my suit...
And you say the
448
00:22:55,061 --> 00:22:56,879
bike Mum bought me was
better than yours.
449
00:22:56,880 --> 00:23:01,119
Yours was way better. That is a totally
unacceptable invasion of privacy.
450
00:23:01,120 --> 00:23:04,919
We can get an injunction to stop you
publishing. No, you can't.
451
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:06,839
Yes, we can. We've looked into it.
452
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:09,199
Between last night and breakfast?
453
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:10,959
Lawyers get to work very early.
454
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:13,479
Oh, you're just
jealous of my success.
455
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:19,079
Oh, I should take that book
and shove it up your...
456
00:23:19,080 --> 00:23:22,599
portal.
Why are you so angry? Me, angry?
457
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,279
That book is the angriest
thing I've ever read.
458
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:27,260
Oh, that's big coming from you.
459
00:23:27,261 --> 00:23:29,239
You're the angriest of anyone!
Don't be ridiculous.
460
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:32,160
You're the angry one.
461
00:23:32,161 --> 00:23:35,079
OK, OK, everyone's angry,
where's my backpack?
462
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,639
They're all very angry, apparently.
463
00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,439
Misty, we're leaving straight
after breakfast.
464
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,479
I'm going to need
the number for a cab.
465
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,719
BOTH: 0207...
946 0505.
466
00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:50,439
You know, it's good sometimes
that I come back to suburbia.
467
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:53,360
It reminds me exactly why I...
468
00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:56,480
God.
469
00:23:58,200 --> 00:23:59,600
I know you hate me, but...
470
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,079
are you working with Brick?
471
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:05,759
Brick?
472
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:10,559
Sneider and Morpego.
This card is from his attorneys.
473
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:13,399
I've no idea what that is.
474
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:15,359
Is Brick paying you?
475
00:24:15,360 --> 00:24:18,199
Oh, that's the card from the man.
What man?
476
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:22,759
The man that called yesterday
and said he wasn't a cold caller.
477
00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:25,679
He asked if Angela was here.
And what did you say?
478
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:30,239
Well, I said "no" obviously
because you weren't here yesterday.
479
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:33,119
Why didn't you tell us this?
I tried to.
480
00:24:33,120 --> 00:24:37,599
But you were too busy arguing
with Jake about his nickname.
481
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:41,560
Have you seen my trainers?
Oh, oh, I know where they are.
482
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:47,360
Oh, don't worry, sweetie, why don't
you go and pack your things?
483
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:52,879
Me and Brick split up badly.
484
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:56,639
He was psychologically abusive,
especially to Misty,
485
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,479
so I left him
and I took her with me.
486
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,799
But, Brick being Brick...
I liked Brick.
487
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,679
Ben. I liked him
cos he was called Brick.
488
00:25:04,680 --> 00:25:06,759
Ben, can you just...?
489
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,799
"I liked Brick too." You didn't know
Brick. "Yes, I did."
490
00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:12,119
No, you didn't. "Yes, I did."
No, you didn't.
491
00:25:12,120 --> 00:25:15,159
So you've done a runner
with Brick's daughter?
492
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,439
I had to, Pete, he's evil.
493
00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:23,519
He had his first wife committed and,
anyway, now he's traced us to London
494
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,160
and I've got nowhere to go.
495
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:32,439
Unless, of course, I could stay
here for a couple of hours,
496
00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:35,799
just until I sort out a hotel.
497
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:39,239
OK, but I want you out by lunchtime.
Out by lunchtime? Absolutely.
498
00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:44,399
All this stuff about Brick,
you didn't put it in the book.
499
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:47,680
The publisher said
to save it for the sequel.
500
00:25:58,040 --> 00:25:59,840
Angela?
501
00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:13,959
Whoo-hoo! Alone at last.
502
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:18,399
She's a difficult woman to get rid of.
I was thinking of calling Rentokil. Dad.
503
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:20,700
Have you phoned Victoria,
like we agreed? Erm...
504
00:26:20,701 --> 00:26:23,000
Come on, Jake, have you
or haven't you? Erm...
505
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:25,920
Hi, Pete.
506
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:29,959
What the hell are you
still doing here?
507
00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:34,279
I'm sorry, all the hotels were
booked out. No, they weren't.
508
00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:36,839
I told you he wouldn't believe you.
I did the talent show.
509
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:38,959
Brick's cut off my cards.
510
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:41,759
Everyone laughed a lot. Great.
But in the wrong places.
511
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:43,359
I've no money. We can't go.
512
00:26:43,360 --> 00:26:45,740
I tried telling them.
I shouted, "Stop laughing",
513
00:26:45,741 --> 00:26:48,119
but it just made them
laugh even more.
514
00:26:48,120 --> 00:26:51,759
It was all Junior's fault.
I've had enough. I'm going solo.
515
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:55,639
Where are all the Jaffa Cakes?
I think Misty had those.
516
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:58,359
Oh, hi, Ben, how did you get
on with the talent con...?
517
00:26:58,360 --> 00:27:00,919
Jesus, you're still here. Yes.
518
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,919
She hasn't got enough
money for a hotel room.
519
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:07,839
I haven't got money for anything.
I'm stuck here.
520
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:10,879
When you say "here",
what exactly do you mean by...
521
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:12,919
MOBILE BLEEPS
522
00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:15,479
Text from Misty.
523
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:19,639
She's having one of her bathroom traumas.
She has a fear of flush toilets.
524
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:23,959
We need to talk about this, you
can't just... Hey! Come back here!
525
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:25,079
I'm coming!
526
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:27,559
Jesus we...
527
00:27:27,560 --> 00:27:31,639
This is turning in to
a...' effing nightmare!
528
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:33,120
So, what you going to do?
529
00:27:33,121 --> 00:27:38,679
Never mind what WE'RE going to do, have you
done what you were supposed to do? Sorry?
530
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:40,080
This girl, have you told her?
531
00:27:40,081 --> 00:27:42,639
I'm not allowed to use my mobile
at school. Ring her now.
532
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:44,399
She's working.
533
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,879
Working? You said she was a student.
534
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:48,919
Yeah, but she's got a part-time job.
535
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:52,839
Doing what? In entertainment.
Doing what? She's a dancer.
536
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:56,799
What, does she dance with a dance
troupe? No, she dances on her own.
537
00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:58,959
She dances on...?
538
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:02,520
Oh, my God!
Is there a pole involved?
539
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:05,079
Sometimes.
540
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:07,599
You're going out with
a 19-year-old lap dancer?
541
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:10,559
No, she's not a lap dancer,
lap dancers are cheap.
542
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,439
She's a pole dancer,
and pole dancing is artistic.
543
00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,159
Oh, is that what she's told you?
544
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,079
No, it is artistic, I've seen her.
545
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:19,079
He's seen her!
She's... You've seen...?
546
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,879
He's seen her!
547
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:24,080
It's OK, I wasn't in the club,
I was only backstage.
548
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,599
With all the other naked strippers?
549
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,999
You just have to be judgmental,
don't you?
550
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:33,559
Naked strippers?
Oi, keep this out of it!
551
00:28:33,560 --> 00:28:36,439
Mum! Dad! Not now, Karen.
552
00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:37,519
DOORBELL RINGS
553
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:41,559
Who's that? It's that man. He's back.
554
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:44,440
The guy that's
looking for Auntie Angela.
555
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:49,840
DOORBELL RINGS
556
00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:12,679
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
557
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:14,880
E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk
558
00:29:14,930 --> 00:29:19,480
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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