All language subtitles for Gidget s01e23 Operation Shaggy Dog.eng

[ Gidget Narrating ]
One thing you'll have to admit about today's kids--

we know what we like.

And the number one
favorite hangout we really dig is The Shaggy Dog.

Maybe it's because of Sock.

That's short
for Henry B. Socrates.

There's something so
kind of lovable about him.

Look, Charlie.
If that face of yours drops any lower,

you're gonna get a chin full
of clam chowder, and it's gonna slop on your tie.

Now, if there's one thing
I can't stomach, it's a slurpy slob!

How's my credit,
Sock?

So what else is new?
Write it down-- in English.

[ Gidget Narrating ]
Or maybe it's because we feel free in here,

away from routine
and discipline.

Hey, Prince. Would you mind
getting your dirty elbow off my clean counter?

Where do you think you are,
home?

We can act as we please,
no one to bug us.

What's with you, Marlon?
Get up too late to find a clean shirt?

Or is this
a new obnoxious look?

My only clean shirt
had a button missing.

Hey, listen. Maybe--
Don't look at me.

I've sewn the last button
I'm ever gonna sew on for you pantywaists.

Besides,
I've lost my thimble.

Hey, Sock,
where'd you learn how to sew?

The marines.
Where do you think--

Mrs. Doolittle's sewing circle
for young ladies?

And another thing about Sock,
he's diplomatic.

Hey, Gertrude. You know,
I don't know what to get you for your birthday--

a set of hair curlers
or a collar and a leash.

Oh, knock it off, Sock.
It's me, Ken.

No kiddin'! [ Chuckles ]
You know, I never thought I'd live to see the day...

when you can't tell
the difference between the boys and the girls.

Of course, at my age
that ain't no major calamity.

But when you can't tell
the difference, chum, you got problems.

I guess what it really is,
is that we feel this place belongs to us.

We discovered it.
It's ours.

Hey, gang! Look!

* [ Jazzy Pop ]

* If you're in doubt
about angels *

* Being real

* I can arrange to change

* Any doubts you feel

* Wait till you see
my Gidget *

* You'll want her
for your valentine *

* You're gonna say
she's all that you adore *

* But stay away
Gidget is spoken for *

* You're gonna find
that Gidget is *

* Mine *

"Citizens unite to oust
Shaggy Dog. Raising funds to buy out Socrates."

Sock, did you
know about this? I heard rumors.

You mean a bunch of people can
get together and throw you out of your own place?

Ever heard of the right
of eminent domain, pal?

Or are those words
too big for you?

Sure, like,
if somebody wants to build a freeway,

they buy out
somebody's property, but that's different.

Yeah. Maybe if you'd get
your hair cut, you could see what's goin' on in the world.

- What are you gonna do, Sock?
- Nothin'.

Yeah, but I thought
you liked it here. Are you kiddin'?

You think it's a thrill for me
to spend the rest of my life lookin' at your mugs?

Listenin' to your beefs?

Look, the biggest favor they
could do is to buy me out.

I got a life to lead too,
you know.

Yeah, but-- Gee, Sock, what
are we gonna do without you?

I mean, where are we gonna
hang out?

Why don't you try hangin' out
at home sometime-- that is, if you remember where it is.

Aw, come on, Sock--
And stop squawkin' till you're hurt.

Nobody's buyin' me out yet--

at least not until they
raise the loot to do it with, and that ain't gonna be easy.

Now will you relax?

And you, drink your milk,
or you won't make the team again this year.

- I've got it!
- Don't get too close to me. It might be contagious.

- Sock, you need a lawyer.
- [ Boy ] That's an idea.

Look, Sam.
I don't need a lawyer. They need one.

Oh, come on, Sock.
Be reasonable.

Now, I happen to be
on very intimate terms with a very influential man.

Your dad!
Right.

He'll help him
get a good lawyer. Will he do it?

Well, I've got
a 50-50 chance. Yeah?

He'll either
say yes or no.

Dad?
Hey! Where's the fire?

Oh, I'm glad you're home.
Well, nice to be popular.

I've got something
to tell you.

Good. I have something
to tell you.

Oh, this is important.
Oh? How much are you overdrawn?

I need a lawyer.
That bad, huh?

Dad, this is serious.
Being sued?

Daddy!
Alienation of affection-- someone stole your boyfriend.

Worse.
What could be worse than that?

It's about
the Shaggy Dog. Oh, that.

What I have to say
is important, Dad.

You don't know
what's going on.

Well, I know a lot more
than you think. Can you imagine the nerve...

of a lot of people getting
together and deciding just like that...

to throw out a perfectly
respectable businessman...

who-- who runs
a perfectly respectable hangout for kids?

Just because a lot
of nerdy squares think-- Now, take it easy.

Take it easy!
Daddy, how can I?

Have you seen
this morning's paper?

Yes. Have you seen
the evening paper?

Traitor!

My father,
the traitor! Gidge, I have told you.

This is not my idea,
even though I do agree with it.

But the citizens got together
and appointed me to--

Russell Lawrence--
Professor Lawrence, late humanitarian--

has joined forces
with the opposition to aid and abet them...

in this disgraceful example
of pilferage!

We are not pilfering anybody.
This is business!

We simply raise the money
to buy out this Mr. Socrates,

and then the city puts up
something attractive on that corner--

something that'll fit into
the surrounding neighborhood.

Like what?
A mausoleum?

A museum-- an art museum--
something like this.

Blech!
I think it's very attractive.

Yeah, if you like
early tombstone. Oh, Gidget.

Oh, Daddy, you can't
do this to Sock.

Sock?
Mr. Socrates.

If you only knew
what a good guy he is, the wonderful things he does.

- You just can't do it to him.
- Do what?

Stop making it sound as if
we're stealing something.

Any astute businessman
will tell you that--

Well, Sock isn't
an astute businessman.

He's just a sweet,
funny-looking little guy

that tells corny jokes
and uses poor English...

and hasn't got
a dime to his name 'cause he gives it all away.

Okay. So soon, he'll be
a sweet, funny-looking little guy

who has a dime to his name.

And the city will
have something that it needs in the bargain.

- A slab of marble. Big deal.
- [ Deepens Voice ] Hamburger joint. Big deal.

I'm not talking about the
hamburger joint. I'm talking about the guy behind it.

And I am not talking
about a slab of marble.

It's what it represents--
progress, beauty,

a-- a storehouse
for history and culture.

Oh, fine. Give us
a few more monuments, and we can forget all about people.

I'm sorry, Gidge,
but I have no choice.

I've given my word.
My committee's already gone to work.

- That's your final decision?
- It is.

Where are you going?

To set up
my own committee. For what?

For the preservation
and protection of private property...

owned by one private citizen,
Henry B. Socrates--

to help him in his fight
against militant forces of evil!

Have any idea
what she'll do? I don't know.

You take
15 and a half years of bottled-up energy...

all wrapped up
in ideals and theories...

and spurred on by do-gooders
and no-good doers--

[ Chuckles ]
Probably write the president

and he'll take it up
with Congress,

and I'll be investigated
for evasion of my income tax.

Oh, it doesn't pay
to evade income tax, Russ. It gets you in trouble.

Thanks,
I'll remember that. Hi, honey.

Hi.
Is there any more coffee?

Uh, yeah,
on the stove. Uh, Shaggy Dog!

If Gidget mentions
that once more--

Well, if I know Gidget,
she's not going to give up until she gets her way.

Getting Gidget a dog,
Russ?

- No, I'm not getting
Gidget a dog, John. - Why not?

I thought I'd get her
an elephant.

Where are you gonna keep
an elephant?

The zoo. She could have
visiting privileges weekends.

Give her the dog.

Well, every youngster should
have one. It teaches them patience and tolerance.

- I think I'll get one
for myself. - There's a selfish attitude.

You're not gonna
let Gidget have a dog, but you're gonna get one.

John, uh, would you see
if the evening paper's here?

Sure thing, honey.

Well, I've got a meeting
with the city council.

Bye.
Bye.

Say! When you take a stand,
you go all out. It even makes the papers.

"Daughter holds out
for Shaggy Dog.

Father says doggy go go."

So our only recourse
is to earn enough money to hire a lawyer...

and fight this nerdy
piece of injustice.

So I've set up
the following committees: Gail Martin, babysitting.

Peter Gates,
house-to-house canvass for empty bottles.

Susie and Connie--

Well.
Meeting of the war council?

Did you want something,
Father? I did.

I presume
it's important. It's an extreme emergency.

I would like my dinner.

Now, Gidget.

[ Gidget Narrating ]
Under the circumstances,

it seemed wise
to yield temporarily to the hierarchy and adjourn.

Bye. I'll see you all later.

[ Gidget Narrating ]
I'll have to admit it wasn't easy arguing with Daddy.

Now, it's fine if you believe
in something strongly enough to fight for it,

but you must be very careful
about what issues you choose to defend.

Unfortunately,
some of the things he said made sense.

Wasting your time trying
to raise money to save a--

a run-down, termite-ridden
hamburger shack is plain stupid!

Fortunately,
some of the things he said didn't make sense.

Here, let me have it.

Thanks a lot.
Oh, I'm sorry.

That's all right. I'll hang
a fried egg around my neck, and nobody'll notice.

Would you like anything else?
Well, I might have a little mayonnaise right--

Toast. Toast.
That should be safe enough.

There's still time
to fight on my side.

I don't believe in your side.
And will you stop making this sound like war?

- But, Daddy, this is war!
- That's fairly obvious.

[ Machine Gun Fire ]

[ No Audible Dialogue ]

[ Machine Gun Fire ]

Gidge! Gidget!

Morning,
Professor Lawrence.

Good morning.
Who's winning?

Well, I'm not!
Looks as if I'm in the wrong war.

You got the right war.
You're just fightin' on the wrong side.

The back door's
usually open.

[ Chattering ]

[ Murmuring ]
Great.

[ Clears Throat ]
May I help you, sir?

You can help me by
clearing out this room immediately.

Uh, I can't do that.
The sale just started.

Frances.
Frances?

Yes, Frances.

I do not intend to stand by
and see strangers come into my home...

and buy my clothes to advance
a cause I don't believe in.

They aren't
your clothes, Daddy.

People anxious to help
a worthwhile cause have been contributing.

That raincoat I just saw
going out the door was mine.

No, it wasn't.
You gave it to the milkman last month.

Then what's it
doing here? He gave it back.

He said he wanted
to contribute something to help our cause.

I don't care what--

You're not selling
that television set!

It's mine.
You gave it to me.

I paid for it!

You have a point.

Never let it be said
that I would stoop to unjust methods.

I'd also like to remind you
that I am having...

a committee meeting here
in the next few minutes.

Oh, that's okay.
You won't bother us. You will bother us.

You can use the den.
Very generous of you.

Perhaps some of
your friends would like to buy something from us.

We've a special today
on some of your old hats.

Those men are coming here
on business. Oh, that's okay.

I'm not fussy who buys.

Care to negotiate?

I do not.

[ Sighs ]

Hi, Gidget. Sorry I'm late.

I had to pick up my cousin
at the airport.

Buzz Britton,
Gidget Lawrence. Hi.

How are you?
Eh, what is this? [ Gasps ]

- It's my watch!
- Buzz is a practicing illusionist.

- A what?
- He makes with the magic.

- He's even been
on television, he's so good. - Oh.

We could use some magic
around here. We're running out of clothes to sell.

See what you
could do about that. I'm at your service.

Hey, where's the enemy
hanging out?

In the den,
waiting for new recruits.

You could watch the door,
if you will. Oh, roger.

[ Giggles ]

Your, uh, purse, madam.

[ Doorbell Rings ]

Gentlemen,
welcome to the combat zone.

We're looking for
Professor Lawrence.

Enemy headquarters
is 10 paces to the right.

Aye, aye.

Gentlemen.

Any more customers?
Huh? Oh, no.

Those were just some men
to see your father. Oh.

Listen, uh, suppose we
could get anything for this?

Where'd you get that?
Oh, a little legerdemain.

- Oh, you didn't!
- Well, you said you needed more clothes.

Well, not like that.
We'll have to give it back.

We're keeping these
ground rules fair.

Now you tell me.

Hi, Dad. There was
this slight confusion at the door.

Gidget, this has
gone far enough. Oh, thank you, Professor.

Perhaps, uh, maybe we better
call a peace conference, huh?

No. I think the time
has come for a showdown.

You're angry?
I'm angry!

Look at this!
Headlines splashed all over the front page!

"Father and daughter
battle."

I've been humiliated,
embarrassed--

Even my students
are laughing at me. That's because you're wrong!

Because you make me
look wrong, which is a very significant difference!

Now, I want to talk to you,
Frances. Here it comes-- the dictator!

Ruler of hearth and home
about to lay down the law to his subjects!

As long as I pay the bills
around here, young lady, that gives me the right to dictate!

As long as you're bigger
than I am and can yell louder and can pull more rank,

I have to listen!
Then suppose you start.

Start what?
Listening!

No need to yell.
I can hear you.

This nonsense, these teenage
revolutionary tactics-- Nonsense? Nonsense?

Don't yell.
I can hear you.

You've spent hours teaching me
to fight for a principle,

and when I do,
you call it nonsense.

I should have spent
more hours teaching you the difference...

between principle
and foolish idealism.

Defending the rights of a man
like Sock is foolish idealism?

Well--

Destroying a man like Sock
is your idea of principle?

No one is destroying anybody.
No one is cheating anybody.

Mr. Socrates is being bought
out fairly and squarely.

How can you buy out
a man's life?

How can you pay him
fairly and squarely for a lifetime of hard work?

How can you put
into dollars and cents what that place means to him?

Or to me? Or to all
the other kids that go there?

He must make
very good hamburgers to earn such loyalty.

He makes
lousy hamburgers.

What is this irresistible
magic this pied piper has?

Oh, go ahead. Make jokes.
Sock's world is collapsing around him, and you--

- And I'm tired of hearing
the name "Sock"! - That figures.

- What figures?
- Crucifying a man you don't even know.

I don't want to know him!

And I thought you were
different from other fathers.

I thought you had compassion
and-- and appreciation for the problems of others.

And I never thought
you'd jump to conclusions without knowing the facts.

- What facts?
- You wouldn't understand, Daddy.

You just wouldn't
understand!

Why am I leaving?
This is my room.

* [ Pop ]

What'll it be?
Coffee, please.

- Cream.
- You're in the wrong age bracket for cream.

Ain't you, pal?
And sugar.

Well, it's your arteries.

As long as you're
living dangerously, how about a hamburger?

[ Quietly ]
No, thank you.

* [ Continues ]

Hey, Sock!
Where are ya?

Sock?
Simmer down! I'll get there when I can!

Well, hurry up!
Come on, Sock!

For Pete's sake!
Can you tone it down to a college yell?

Nah, you haven't changed
a bit. Still the same old bundle of charm.

And here I come
3,000 miles just to have a bottle of champagne.

Gary! Gary Preeman!

Dr. Preeman,
if you please.

Cast your baby blues
over this.

Go ahead, Sock.
Read it. Read it!

"Gerald Frederick Preeman,
M.D.

Doctor of Medicine,
New York Medical College." How'd you get this?

They givin' these away
instead of tradin' stamps? Sure they are--

four years of college
four years of medical school, three years internship.

Now all I need
is three years more residency at Memorial,

and I can hang up
my own shingle.

Congratulations.
I've still got your tab.

Maybe you can
pay your bill. My bill?

Listen. I'm gonna hand you
a blank check, and you can fill in your own numbers.

Uh, that is,
if you can hang loose for about three years.

- What else is new?
- On the level, Sock. I mean it.

If anyone has a lien
on this piece of parchment, it's you.

I'd have never made it alone.
That's why I came here-- to let you know about it.

Cut it out.
You'll have me bawlin', and my mascara'll run.

Besides, I'm busy.
Eh--

Were where do you keep
the glasses?

What do you mean, glasses?
I just washed the glasses.

There are some paper cups
under the counter.

I might have known.
Hi. Hi.

Join me in a toast
to the old guy?

Uh, thanks. I'm having coffee.

A very inappropriate beverage
for a celebration. [ Cork Pops ]

I mean, uh, you wouldn't know
it, but this is a very important moment in my life.

I promised myself eight years
ago that, if I ever made it, [ Clattering ]

this'd be the first place
I'd head for--

just to hug that ugly old man
and say thanks.

You came all the way
from New York to say thanks?

Little enough.
Hey, Sock! Hurry up!

You know,
this place hasn't changed since the first time I saw it.

I remember one day,
my life was crashing in around me--

home, schools.

My father's business
was on the skids.

Money was tight.
Oh, it was lovely.

So I decided
to make a switch.

Quit school, get a job,
hit the road.

You know who stopped me?
That character.

No, no, no.
No lecture.

Nothing like that.
He put me to work.

He said if I was
lookin' for a job, I might as well start here.

So he put me in
the kitchen washin' dishes. Kept me there all night.

I must have washed
enough dishes to fill the Empire State Building.

I found out later that,
uh, soon as I washed 'em, he kept dirtying 'em up again.

Then the following morning,
I was ready to go home and back to school.

That was the first day.
Now, you multiply that by 730,

and you got a picture
of the next two years.

I wish I had a buck
for every other kid he's helped.

What are you tryin' to do,
ruin my image?

I'd have never made it,
Sock, without your help.

And you know it.
Okay, Doc. I'll try to work up an ulcer for your first case.

Here's to you, Sock.

[ Knocking ]

Anyone for a cease-fire?

Oh, Dad!

Hi, Pop.
Hey, here are the new plans for the art museum, Gidge.

Oh!

- The new Shaggy Dog.
- Terrif!

It'll be the first time
Picasso and pizza ever shared the same roof.

Has Sock seen it yet?
No, I thought you might like that pleasure.

Great, 'cause we're
going there tonight. Huh? Who's picking you up?

[ Doorbell Rings ]
Oh, Dad, would you get the door?

It's Buzz Britton--

you know, the magic man that
was here the night of the battle of the Lawrences.

I'll never forget him.
Would you get it, please?

I d-- You answer the door.
I don't trust him.

Oh, come on, Daddy.
He promised not to steal any more clothes.

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, hello, Buzz.
Good evening, Professor. How are you?

Nice to see you.
Hi, Buzz. I'm ready.

Well, let's go.
Okay. Bye, Dad.

Good-bye, dear.
Good night, Professor.

Nice seeing you.

Gidget.

Gidget!

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