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♪ The Simpsons ♪
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D'
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Zounds! I did thee
mightily smitely.
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"Zounds" is
a Renaissance English word
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00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,675
short for "God's wounds."
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00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,886
But "Smitely,"
that's pure Flanders.
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Please call a doctor.
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00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:59,100
These Renaissance Faires
are so boring.
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00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:00,268
Really?
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Did you see the loom?
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I took loom in high school.
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Meh.
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Yon meat 'tis sweet
as summer's wafting breeze.
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Can I have some?
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Mine ears are open
only to the pleas
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of those who speak
ye olde English.
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Sweet maiden of the spit
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grant now my boon,
that I might sup
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upon suckling pig this noon.
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Whatever.
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00:01:32,258 --> 00:01:35,095
I've eaten
eight different meats.
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I'm a true Renaissance man.
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I'll go to the first aid tent
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and tell them to plug in
ye olde stomach pump.
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Alight your gaze
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00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:49,818
on yonder fabled beasts of yore.
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Behold the rarest of the rare,
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the mythological
two-headed hound
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born with only one head.
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00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:01,371
Ooh. And here
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00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:02,956
out of the mists of history,
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the legendary esquilax...
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00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:06,435
A horse with the head
of a rabbit
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00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:11,047
and the body of a rabbit.
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00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,466
It's galloping away.
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Here, bunny, bunny.
Here, bunny.
37
00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:16,552
Here, esquilax.
38
00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,651
I've been waiting for you, Lisa.
39
00:02:31,734 --> 00:02:33,570
How did you know my name?!
40
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:34,653
Your name tag.
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00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:39,159
Would you like to
know your future?
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00:02:39,242 --> 00:02:41,035
Sorry, I don't believe
in fortune telling.
43
00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:42,495
I should go.
44
00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:43,872
What's your hurry?
45
00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:45,432
Bart, Maggie and Marge
are at the joust
46
00:02:45,456 --> 00:02:48,126
and Homer is heckling
the puppet show.
47
00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:51,379
Wow. You can see
into the... present.
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00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:54,465
Now we'll see what
the future holds.
49
00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:57,594
The death card?
50
00:02:57,677 --> 00:02:59,095
No, that's good.
51
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,431
It means transition, change.
52
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:04,017
That's cute.
53
00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:05,935
The happy squirrel!
54
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:06,936
That's bad?
55
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,271
Possibly.
56
00:03:08,354 --> 00:03:10,481
The cards are vague
and mysterious.
57
00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:12,025
They seem to be revealing
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00:03:12,108 --> 00:03:13,985
the story of your first love.
59
00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:15,820
Do you want me to continue?
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00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:18,031
Guess so.
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00:03:18,114 --> 00:03:21,201
It's... It's coming to me.
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00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:26,414
Yes, I see an eastern university
in the year 2010.
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00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:29,834
The world has become
a very different place.
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00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:43,348
I can't wait to see that play.
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00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:57,278
- Hey, watch it.
- Watch it.
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00:03:58,571 --> 00:03:59,781
That man is instantly
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00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:01,407
the most annoying person
I've ever met.
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00:04:02,825 --> 00:04:04,827
A soy-based snack
will calm me down.
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00:04:17,340 --> 00:04:18,340
Him again!
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00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:29,644
Hello. I need "Ecosystem
of the Marsh" by Thompson.
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00:04:29,727 --> 00:04:33,439
The last copy was just
signed out by, um...
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00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:35,024
Hugh Parkfield.
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00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:36,401
There he is.
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00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:37,484
No!
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00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,362
It couldn't be.
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00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:42,991
Thanks for holding my book
while I tied my shoe.
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00:04:43,074 --> 00:04:44,492
D'
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00:04:44,575 --> 00:04:45,827
That's the book I need.
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00:04:45,910 --> 00:04:47,510
You'll probably take
forever with it too.
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00:04:47,578 --> 00:04:48,658
I can read faster than you.
81
00:04:48,705 --> 00:04:50,164
I read at a 78th grade level.
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00:04:50,248 --> 00:04:51,248
Right here.
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00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,214
- Finish this page?
- Ages ago.
84
00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:01,467
- I'll get a dictionary.
- Why?
85
00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:03,529
You'll see when you get there.
The word "stochastic."
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00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:04,721
"Pertaining to a process
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00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:05,906
"involving a randomly determined
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00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:06,931
sequence of
observations."
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00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,896
First they hate each other,
90
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,857
now, all of a sudden,
they love each other.
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00:05:15,940 --> 00:05:17,734
It doesn't make any sense to me.
92
00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,527
Of course not.
You're a robot.
93
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,748
I've never met anyone
who so understood
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00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:32,749
the magic of Jim Carrey.
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00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,167
He can make you laugh
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00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:36,627
with no more than frantic
flailing of his limbs.
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00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:38,629
I can't believe
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00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:39,881
how much we have in common.
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00:05:39,964 --> 00:05:41,841
We're both studying
the environment,
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00:05:41,924 --> 00:05:44,344
we're both utterly humorless
about our vegetarianism
101
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,346
and we both love
The Rolling Stones.
102
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:49,724
Yes, not for their music,
but for their tireless efforts
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00:05:49,807 --> 00:05:51,351
to preserve historic buildings.
104
00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:52,685
Lisa, I can't bear the thought
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00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:53,954
of being apart from you
all summer.
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00:05:53,978 --> 00:05:54,997
Come back with me
to Parkfield Manor.
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00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,689
I'd love to.
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00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,900
Can we get vegetarian meals
at your parent's house?
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00:05:58,983 --> 00:06:00,234
Yes, we can, Lisa.
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00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:02,820
That is good because
eating animals is wrong.
111
00:06:02,904 --> 00:06:03,946
So very wrong.
112
00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:05,531
When will the world learn?
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00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:06,657
I don't know.
114
00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:08,326
I just don't know.
115
00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:12,538
I love these new planes.
116
00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:13,974
Yes, it's a good thing
they reevaluated
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00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,458
those wacky old designs.
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00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:29,847
Beautiful dinnerware,
Mrs. Parkfield.
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00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:31,557
Thank you, Lisa.
They were made
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00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:33,309
for the finest
family in Britain.
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00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,145
I don't know
how we ended up with them.
122
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:38,272
Should I laugh?
123
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,441
Was that dry British wit,
or subtle self-pity?
124
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:42,443
They're staring at me.
Better respond.
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00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:48,616
It's good to hear
a boisterous American laugh.
126
00:06:48,699 --> 00:06:50,118
And I love that painting.
127
00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:52,662
Judging by the clothes,
I'd say 17th century.
128
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:55,581
Actually, Lisa,
it's just Uncle Eldred.
129
00:06:55,665 --> 00:06:59,168
I get me brain medicines
from the National Health.
130
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:03,923
This place
is so enchanting, Hugh.
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00:07:04,006 --> 00:07:05,258
I love it here.
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00:07:05,341 --> 00:07:06,884
I wanted this
to be perfect for you.
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00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:10,138
I know you Americans
like everything to be...
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00:07:10,221 --> 00:07:11,222
fireworks.
135
00:07:23,067 --> 00:07:24,777
Blast!
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00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,821
Go to plan B.
137
00:07:30,074 --> 00:07:31,409
Yes, I will.
138
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:36,664
Isn't it wonderful?
139
00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:40,668
Master Hugh
has found a true love.
140
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:53,514
Hi, Mom.
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00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,308
Lisa, hello.
142
00:07:55,391 --> 00:07:56,934
How are you doing in England?
143
00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:58,853
Remember, an elevator
is called a "lift,"
144
00:07:58,936 --> 00:08:00,396
a mile is called a "kilometer,"
145
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,607
and botulism is called
"steak and kidney pie."
146
00:08:02,690 --> 00:08:04,901
Guess what?
Hugh and I are getting married.
147
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:06,527
All right!
148
00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:09,405
Lisa, that's wonderful.
149
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:13,159
If only your father
was still with us...
150
00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:15,703
but he left for work
a few minutes ago.
151
00:08:15,786 --> 00:08:17,026
Mom, remember when I was little
152
00:08:17,079 --> 00:08:18,706
we'd always plan
my dream wedding
153
00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:22,293
and you always promised to...
you know, well...
154
00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:24,587
keep Dad from ruining it?
155
00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:26,297
Don't worry, honey.
156
00:08:26,380 --> 00:08:28,674
I guarantee
your father will behave.
157
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:30,259
Mom, it's a picture phone.
158
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,094
This? This?
159
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,930
No, I've just got
a touch of the rheumatiz.
160
00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:36,598
Mom, picture phone.
161
00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:41,479
Hi, Mom.
That's great news about Lisa.
162
00:08:41,562 --> 00:08:43,189
Well, listen,
I better get back to work.
163
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:47,276
They're finally
paying me for this.
164
00:08:51,447 --> 00:08:52,447
Yeah!
165
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:04,669
Yes, but the international
market is my focus.
166
00:09:04,752 --> 00:09:05,795
Whoo-hoo!
167
00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:08,381
Marge, that's great news!
168
00:09:08,464 --> 00:09:11,008
Hey, hey, there with
the personal calls, Simpson.
169
00:09:11,092 --> 00:09:13,553
But Mr. Milhouse
170
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:14,916
my little girl's
getting married.
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00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:16,097
Lisa?
172
00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:19,100
My one true love.
173
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,019
It's not you, Milhouse.
174
00:09:22,103 --> 00:09:23,938
I just don't plan
to ever get married.
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00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:32,154
I think I'll write your
performance evaluation now,
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00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:33,238
Simpson.
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00:09:39,161 --> 00:09:40,621
I got to call everyone
178
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:41,956
and tell them the good news.
179
00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:45,626
Maggie! I need to use the phone!
180
00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:49,630
Will that girl ever shut up?
181
00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:51,549
Okay, Marge,
I'll plan everything.
182
00:09:51,632 --> 00:09:53,259
We can have
the reception at Moe's.
183
00:09:53,342 --> 00:09:55,261
Wait! Why not have
the whole wedding there?
184
00:09:55,344 --> 00:09:56,846
We'll do it
on a Monday morning...
185
00:09:56,929 --> 00:09:58,222
There'll be fewer drunks.
186
00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:00,016
Homer, don't take
this personally
187
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:01,475
but I've obtained a court order
188
00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:03,199
to prevent you from
planning this wedding.
189
00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:06,123
Well, these seem to be in order.
190
00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:07,427
I'll be out back in the hammock.
191
00:10:10,651 --> 00:10:12,945
"Mr. Smithers plus guest."
192
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,531
There's only one person
I would want to bring.
193
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:21,454
Mr. Burns,
we'll thaw you out
194
00:10:21,537 --> 00:10:22,872
the second they
discover the cure
195
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:25,124
for 17 stab wounds in the back.
196
00:10:25,207 --> 00:10:26,207
How we doing, boys?
197
00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:27,501
Well, we're up to 15.
198
00:10:36,927 --> 00:10:38,262
Now turn to the next problem.
199
00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:41,057
If you have three Pepsis
and drink one
200
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,017
how much more refreshed are you?
201
00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:44,828
You, the redhead in
the Chicago school system?
202
00:10:44,852 --> 00:10:45,936
Pepsi?
203
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:47,020
Partial credit.
204
00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:50,650
We've been invited
to the wedding
205
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:52,943
of our only graduate to
read at an adult level.
206
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,488
It must be Lisa Simpson.
Because, of course,
207
00:10:55,571 --> 00:10:58,157
Martin Prince perished
in that science fair explosion.
208
00:11:00,034 --> 00:11:02,119
Not quite perished,
my lady love.
209
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:05,039
Although some days,
I wish I had.
210
00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:08,000
♪♪
211
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,889
Hey, I remember you.
Mayor Quimby, right?
212
00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:26,227
No. Look at this license...
Mohamed Jafar.
213
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:28,062
Quimby, after this fare
214
00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:29,831
get your indicted ass out to
the convention center.
215
00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,191
I cut the ribbon
at that convention center.
216
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,072
Just a couple more blocks
to my house.
217
00:11:41,742 --> 00:11:43,244
Lisa, darling, don't worry.
218
00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:45,204
I'm sure I'll get along
with your family.
219
00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:47,164
You've so thoroughly
prepared me for the worst.
220
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:48,725
As long as they're not
squatting in a ditch
221
00:11:48,749 --> 00:11:51,085
poking berries up their noses.
222
00:11:51,168 --> 00:11:52,628
And if they are?
223
00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:56,507
Here they come!
Raise the flag!
224
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,137
Lisa!
225
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:02,722
Yo, Hugh!
226
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:05,141
Here's a little bit
of U.S. hospitality.
227
00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:06,851
What do you think of that?
228
00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:10,813
Dad!
229
00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:11,896
Aah!
230
00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:14,817
Now throw compost on it.
231
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:20,322
Enjoy.
232
00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:23,993
Still warm.
233
00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:32,769
You can be the first to try out
234
00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:34,420
the new guest bedroom I built.
235
00:12:34,503 --> 00:12:36,422
Remember, if the building
inspector comes by
236
00:12:36,505 --> 00:12:37,865
it's not a room,
it's a window box.
237
00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:41,677
Hugh, thank you.
238
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:44,638
You've been just wonderful
through this entire ordeal.
239
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,098
Lisa, I love you so much
240
00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:47,542
I'm willing to go
through anything.
241
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:52,062
Are you okay?
242
00:12:52,146 --> 00:12:53,773
I'm fine, Lisa.
243
00:12:53,856 --> 00:12:54,774
Fortunately, the compost heap
244
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:56,400
broke my fall.
245
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:58,319
Be a dear, run a bath.
246
00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:05,075
Homer, Bart, Maggie,
company eating rules?
247
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:07,119
Right.
248
00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:10,664
Anyway, Hugh,
249
00:13:10,748 --> 00:13:13,501
there's more to my life
than just the wrecking ball.
250
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,461
I also crush cars into cubes.
251
00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:18,088
And on the side, I promote
local tough man contests.
252
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:19,566
Basically, I'm getting out
all my aggression
253
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,175
till I go to law school.
254
00:13:21,258 --> 00:13:24,094
So, Hugh, have you heard all
the latest American jokes?
255
00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:25,262
Here's a good one.
256
00:13:25,346 --> 00:13:26,806
Pull my finger.
257
00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:29,600
Yes, we have that one
in England too, Mr. Simpson.
258
00:13:29,683 --> 00:13:31,519
I said, pull my finger!
259
00:13:31,602 --> 00:13:34,230
Mom, we've got my wedding dress
fitting this afternoon.
260
00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:35,540
Maggie, if you're
not doing anything,
261
00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:37,358
why don't you come with us?
262
00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:40,027
Maggie, don't talk
with your mouth full!
263
00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:42,391
Me and Bart will take Hugh
out on the town this afternoon.
264
00:13:42,446 --> 00:13:44,365
Hugh should take it easy
because of his fall.
265
00:13:44,448 --> 00:13:46,116
Lisa, please.
The only thing bruised
266
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:47,409
in that fall was my spine.
267
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:48,953
I'll be delighted.
268
00:13:49,036 --> 00:13:51,872
Great. There's only one thing
I ask in return.
269
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,666
- Certainly.
- Pull my finger!
270
00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:56,293
So, this driving on the left
271
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:57,962
makes you feel
more at home, Hugh?
272
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,465
And tonight,
273
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,717
the following celebrities
have been arrested...
274
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,346
while Heather Locklear Fortensky
275
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:08,848
remains at large.
276
00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:10,516
Remember, if you see
any celebrities
277
00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:11,600
consider them dangerous.
278
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:13,769
You know, I rather
like this pub.
279
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:16,063
Ho! An English boy?
280
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:18,440
You know, we saved your ass
in World War II.
281
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,693
Yeah, well we saved
your ass in World War III.
282
00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:22,278
That's true.
283
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:24,113
Hugh, there's something
I want you to have.
284
00:14:24,196 --> 00:14:26,073
My dad gave me
his cufflinks to wear
285
00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:27,616
on the day I married Marge
286
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,243
and they brought us good luck.
287
00:14:29,326 --> 00:14:31,328
I couldn't imagine
a happier marriage.
288
00:14:31,412 --> 00:14:34,582
We don't have many
traditions in our family
289
00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:35,749
but it'd mean a lot to me
290
00:14:35,833 --> 00:14:39,211
if you kept this one alive.
291
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:40,296
Well, I'd be honored.
292
00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,923
To...
293
00:14:43,007 --> 00:14:45,092
wear those... things.
294
00:14:45,175 --> 00:14:46,175
Aw.
295
00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:51,974
Hey, watch those virtual darts!
296
00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:53,517
I'm trying to play virtual pool.
297
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,728
Why you!
298
00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:59,773
Hey! Hey!
No fighting in my bar!
299
00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:05,946
You know, Fox turned into
300
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,490
a hard-core sex
channel so gradually
301
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:09,742
I didn't even notice.
302
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:11,327
Eesh!
303
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:12,971
Marge, it's so great
to have the whole family
304
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:14,204
together under one roof.
305
00:15:14,288 --> 00:15:16,790
I never realized
how much I missed it.
306
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,043
Listen to the murmurs
in the next room.
307
00:15:19,126 --> 00:15:22,296
The house is full of life again.
308
00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:25,049
Keep it down in there!
309
00:15:25,132 --> 00:15:27,259
All right, Dad!
310
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:29,803
I'm sorry I left you alone
with Homer and Bart.
311
00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,473
No, no, honey.
We had a fine time.
312
00:15:32,556 --> 00:15:34,236
How did you get that gash
on your forehead?
313
00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:35,726
That was when
we hid in the dumpster
314
00:15:35,809 --> 00:15:37,144
after the fire alarm went off
315
00:15:37,227 --> 00:15:38,747
in the pornographic
magazine warehouse.
316
00:15:38,812 --> 00:15:41,607
You are so good
to put up with all of this.
317
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:43,734
Don't be silly, Lisa.
318
00:15:43,817 --> 00:15:46,278
Everything's fine... Really.
319
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,030
Now go to sleep.
320
00:15:48,113 --> 00:15:49,907
We have a big day
ahead of us tomorrow.
321
00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:53,243
A big, long day.
322
00:16:00,709 --> 00:16:02,086
Lisa, I can't believe
323
00:16:02,169 --> 00:16:03,796
it's your wedding day already.
324
00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:06,090
Mom, I feel kind of
funny wearing white.
325
00:16:06,173 --> 00:16:08,092
I mean, Milhouse...
326
00:16:08,175 --> 00:16:09,718
Milhouse doesn't count.
327
00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:16,350
Okay, I've got something old,
328
00:16:16,433 --> 00:16:17,726
that's my pearl necklace.
329
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,395
Something new
is the wedding dress.
330
00:16:19,478 --> 00:16:21,230
Something borrowed
is this antique brooch
331
00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:22,481
from Hugh's mother.
332
00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:23,804
Now I just need something blue.
333
00:16:25,192 --> 00:16:26,610
Here.
334
00:16:26,694 --> 00:16:29,279
Mom, thanks.
335
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:37,746
Hi!
336
00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:40,874
Wow, Lisa, looking at you
337
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:42,209
makes me want to get married
338
00:16:42,292 --> 00:16:43,752
for a third time.
339
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,295
I met a really
nice exotic dancer
340
00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:47,214
the other night
at Hugh's bachelor party.
341
00:16:47,297 --> 00:16:48,882
Hugh didn't have
a bachelor party.
342
00:16:48,966 --> 00:16:49,966
We had one in his honor.
343
00:16:51,468 --> 00:16:52,468
I had one in his honor.
344
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,514
I went to a strip club.
345
00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:59,393
Well, here goes nothing.
346
00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:05,274
Mom, Dad, meet...
347
00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:06,357
Homer Simpson.
348
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,027
- How do you do?
- How are you?
349
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:09,278
Nice to meet you.
350
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,908
You know what's great
about you English?
351
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:16,368
"Octopussy."
352
00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:19,747
Man, I must have
seen that movie... twice.
353
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,123
Yes...
354
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:22,958
Yes!
355
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,293
Well, that's not too bad.
356
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:28,922
Hey, Krabappel.
357
00:17:29,006 --> 00:17:30,549
You get in the way
of that bouquet,
358
00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:32,217
I'll stuff that sun hat
down your neck.
359
00:17:33,635 --> 00:17:35,179
Smithers, take me home.
360
00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:36,388
I'm not fully defrosted.
361
00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:37,890
Nonsense.
362
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:39,475
Just sit down
and rest for a moment.
363
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:40,934
Here you go.
364
00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:42,936
No.
365
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:44,897
We've got a little
situation here.
366
00:17:44,980 --> 00:17:47,608
I can't feel anything
below my cummerbund.
367
00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:49,193
Ooh-la-la!
368
00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:50,360
Hi, Dad.
369
00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:52,071
You look great, sweetheart.
370
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:53,197
Thanks.
371
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:55,908
Little Lisa, Lisa Simpson.
372
00:17:55,991 --> 00:17:57,594
You know, I always felt
you were the best thing
373
00:17:57,618 --> 00:17:59,161
my name ever got attached to.
374
00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:01,455
Since the time you learned
to pin your own diapers,
375
00:18:01,538 --> 00:18:03,707
you've been smarter than me.
376
00:18:03,791 --> 00:18:06,543
- Dad.
- No, no. Let me finish.
377
00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,480
I just want you to know,
I've always been proud of you.
378
00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:10,255
You're my greatest
accomplishment
379
00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:12,257
and you did it all yourself.
380
00:18:12,341 --> 00:18:14,843
You helped me understand
my own wife better
381
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,637
and taught me to be
a better person
382
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:18,639
but you're also my daughter.
383
00:18:18,722 --> 00:18:21,975
I don't think anybody could have
had a better daughter than...
384
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:24,520
- Dad, you're babbling.
- See? You're still helping me.
385
00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:30,442
Hey, Dad, did you forget to
give those cufflinks to Hugh?
386
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:33,320
- No.
- Well?
387
00:18:33,403 --> 00:18:35,239
I found them on
the nightstand this morning.
388
00:18:35,322 --> 00:18:36,341
I guess they weren't
his cup of tea.
389
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:37,741
Don't worry about it.
390
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,469
But you've been going on
about these all week.
391
00:18:39,493 --> 00:18:41,036
I'm sure he just forgot.
392
00:18:42,830 --> 00:18:44,248
Lisa! We're not
supposed to see
393
00:18:44,331 --> 00:18:45,531
each other before the wedding.
394
00:18:45,582 --> 00:18:46,834
It's tradition.
395
00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:49,211
What about
my family's tradition?
396
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,588
Surely, you don't want
me to wear those
397
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,465
in front of my parents
and their friends?
398
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,259
But you promised
my dad you would.
399
00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:57,136
I was just humoring
him, darling.
400
00:18:57,219 --> 00:18:59,012
Actually, he frightens me a bit.
401
00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:00,806
I know they look a little silly
402
00:19:00,889 --> 00:19:02,700
but his feelings will be hurt
if you don't wear them.
403
00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,309
Fine.
404
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:05,936
I must say, you were right.
405
00:19:06,019 --> 00:19:08,021
This has been quite trying.
406
00:19:08,105 --> 00:19:10,274
You know, I've attempted
to enjoy your family
407
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:12,484
on a personal level,
on an ironic level,
408
00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:15,612
as a novelty, as camp,
as kitsch,
409
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:17,906
as a cautionary example...
Nothing works.
410
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:20,367
Frankly, I'll be quite relieved
when we get back to England
411
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:21,952
and we won't have
to deal with them.
412
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:24,163
Are you saying we won't
see my family again?
413
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:25,515
Well, possibly
your mother will come
414
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:26,915
when the children are born.
415
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,542
I can't believe
I'm hearing this.
416
00:19:28,625 --> 00:19:29,936
I don't want to cut
my family out of my life.
417
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,378
Really?
418
00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:33,422
But Lisa, you're better
than this place...
419
00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:35,966
You're like a flower that grew
out of a pot of dirt.
420
00:19:36,049 --> 00:19:38,302
That's a horrible thing to say!
421
00:19:38,385 --> 00:19:40,721
Come on, you complain
about them more than anyone.
422
00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:43,473
Maybe, but I still love them,
423
00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:46,185
and I don't think
you understand that.
424
00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:54,401
And now, to sing "Amazing Grace"
425
00:19:54,484 --> 00:19:55,484
Miss Maggie Simpson.
426
00:19:56,945 --> 00:19:58,071
She's quite a hellion
427
00:19:58,155 --> 00:20:00,449
but she does have
an incredible voice.
428
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:04,620
Stop everything!
429
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:05,983
The wedding has been called off.
430
00:20:07,831 --> 00:20:09,666
Ha! Ha!
431
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:14,755
This is very sad news
432
00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:16,381
and it never would've happened
433
00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:19,343
if the wedding had been
inside the church with God
434
00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:23,430
instead of out here in the
cheap showiness of nature.
435
00:20:23,513 --> 00:20:24,640
Who wants cake?
436
00:20:42,115 --> 00:20:44,785
The next day,
Hugh goes back to England
437
00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:47,037
and you never see him again.
438
00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,331
Wow! Now that
I know all this
439
00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,124
isn't there any way
to change the future?
440
00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:53,835
No, but try to look surprised.
441
00:20:53,919 --> 00:20:55,897
I thought you said you'd
tell me about my true love.
442
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:58,465
You'll have a true love
443
00:20:58,548 --> 00:21:00,342
but I specialize in foretelling
444
00:21:00,425 --> 00:21:02,344
the relationships where
you get jerked around.
445
00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:18,318
Lisa! Lisa!
Where were you?
446
00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:19,842
You missed the most
incredible thing!
447
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:21,446
Hi, Dad.
448
00:21:21,530 --> 00:21:23,824
I ate seven pounds of fudge!
449
00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:25,284
Wow!
450
00:21:25,367 --> 00:21:26,803
The man at the stand
said it was a record.
451
00:21:26,827 --> 00:21:28,120
Wow, what else did you do, Dad?
452
00:21:28,203 --> 00:21:30,122
I rode the teacups.
453
00:21:30,205 --> 00:21:32,045
Then I got a little sick
and I had to sit down.
454
00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:34,209
But then I rode them again...
455
00:21:40,340 --> 00:21:42,259
♪♪
456
00:22:25,969 --> 00:22:26,969
Shh.
457
00:22:30,223 --> 00:22:32,934
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