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1
00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,922
♪ The Simpsons ♪
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00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,482
D'
3
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:07,734
Aah!
4
00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:26,044
Ain't that cute?
5
00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:31,382
Hey! Where in God's name
did you learn that kind of...
6
00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:33,134
dancing?
7
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:37,430
Whoa.
8
00:01:37,514 --> 00:01:38,973
Ooh.
9
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,141
Yeah.
10
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,392
Dad, can I have some money
11
00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:42,936
to buy Bart a birthday present?
12
00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:45,188
Money.
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00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,649
Dad, this is $110.
14
00:01:47,732 --> 00:01:49,818
- Sorry.
- That's very righteous.
15
00:01:49,901 --> 00:01:51,820
Funky See, Funky Do
will be back to lip sync
16
00:01:51,903 --> 00:01:55,198
another one of their
hits right after this.
17
00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:57,992
Hey, kids, why sit in front of the TV
18
00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:01,079
when you can be on the radio?
19
00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:03,706
♪ We're gonna roll
this truckin' convoy ♪
20
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:05,875
♪ Across the U.S.A. ♪
21
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,962
♪ Convoy ♪
22
00:02:09,045 --> 00:02:10,213
That could be Bart.
23
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,257
Throw away
your bulky transmitters
24
00:02:12,340 --> 00:02:13,424
and broadcasting towers.
25
00:02:13,508 --> 00:02:15,468
The Superstar
Celebrity Microphone
26
00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:17,887
lets you hear your voice
through any A.M. radio.
27
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,139
Hey, good-looking,
28
00:02:19,222 --> 00:02:21,349
we'll be back
to pick you up later.
29
00:02:21,432 --> 00:02:23,643
He's in for some loving.
30
00:02:23,726 --> 00:02:26,312
It's the perfect gift
for birthdays, graduations,
31
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,439
- board meetings.
- You're fired.
32
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:30,108
Bart's birthday's coming up.
33
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,860
But order now,
supply is limited.
34
00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:34,487
Limited?
35
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:36,406
Do you have any of
those microphones left?
36
00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:38,491
Yeah, a couple.
37
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,243
You know, Marge,
38
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,513
Bart's really going to like
my birthday present this year.
39
00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:43,722
It won't be like
those shoe trees
40
00:02:43,746 --> 00:02:45,039
I got him last year
41
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,542
or the shelf paper
I bought him for Christmas.
42
00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:50,378
- I'll buy his love yet.
- Yeah.
43
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,973
Okay, Sideshow Mel,
bring out the birthday cake.
44
00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:13,234
Hey, kids,
while Sideshow Mel mops up,
45
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:16,946
Let's see the names of our
Krusty birthday pals for today.
46
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,823
All right, here comes my name.
47
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:23,745
Wow. Best eight bucks
I ever spent.
48
00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:26,039
Bart,
your Grampa's on the phone.
49
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,416
He wants to wish you
a happy birthday.
50
00:03:28,499 --> 00:03:29,542
Isn't that nice?
51
00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:31,169
Take a message.
52
00:03:31,252 --> 00:03:33,213
Right now, I'm off
to hit 46 local merchants
53
00:03:33,296 --> 00:03:34,736
for free birthday
goods and services.
54
00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:38,843
I'm here for my free
birthday sundae.
55
00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:40,970
Eat it and get out.
56
00:03:43,097 --> 00:03:45,016
Digital audio tape, my butt.
57
00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:47,393
When I was a kid,
we had compact discs,
58
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:48,621
and I don't recall
no one complaining.
59
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:49,687
Damn right.
60
00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:53,691
♪♪
61
00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,947
Sorry, Rosarita.
62
00:03:59,030 --> 00:03:59,822
I got to get
to my birthday party.
63
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:01,532
Farewell, Señor Bart.
64
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,007
Hey, good to see you.
Glad you could make it.
65
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,542
Toby, have you lost weight?
66
00:04:11,626 --> 00:04:14,087
Here comes trouble.
67
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:18,258
It's Wall E.!
68
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:21,886
Hey, Wall E.,
do something funny.
69
00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:23,388
Hey, later, okay?
70
00:04:23,471 --> 00:04:24,991
Hey, why don't you
go bug your parents?
71
00:04:26,557 --> 00:04:28,518
Cool, Larry the Looter.
72
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:36,359
All right, stick it to the man.
73
00:04:48,871 --> 00:04:51,249
Hey, there.
I hear it's your birthday.
74
00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:53,376
- How old are you?
- Well, I'm...
75
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:56,754
That's great. Would you like us
to sing you a special song?
76
00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:58,256
- Hell no.
- You got it.
77
00:04:58,339 --> 00:04:59,716
Ready, Señor Beaveratti?
78
00:04:59,799 --> 00:05:01,843
I'm a-ready.
79
00:05:01,926 --> 00:05:04,053
And a-one, and a-two...
80
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,347
♪ You're the birthday ♪
81
00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:08,308
♪ You're the birthday ♪
82
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:11,894
♪ You're the birthday boy
or girl... ♪
83
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:24,324
What the...
84
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,284
It's a label maker.
85
00:05:26,367 --> 00:05:27,910
We have one at home.
86
00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,430
Before we got it,
I was always finding
87
00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:31,205
Patty's stubble in my leg razor.
88
00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:42,967
Bart, I'll bet you think
89
00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,403
nothing's going
to top that cactus.
90
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:47,221
Well, check out my present.
91
00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:52,268
- Next.
- Bart, be polite.
92
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,812
- Next, please.
- Bart, I've noticed
93
00:05:54,896 --> 00:05:58,274
your birthday presents
are a poor crop at best.
94
00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,568
I hope this turns the tide.
95
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,864
Ooh, just gorgeous.
96
00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:06,657
Now we can be twins.
97
00:06:21,714 --> 00:06:24,467
Aw, there's only one can of
beer left, and it's Bart's.
98
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:26,803
Hey, boy,
how's the microphone working?
99
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,763
Fine.
100
00:06:28,846 --> 00:06:32,308
Bart! I would love
to get a present like that.
101
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:33,643
Here you go.
Enjoy.
102
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:35,061
D'
103
00:06:35,144 --> 00:06:38,064
Listen boy, this is
a great invention. Watch.
104
00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:40,108
♪ We got a great big convoy ♪
105
00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:42,318
♪ Rocking through
the night ♪
106
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:46,322
♪ We got a great big convoy,
ain't she a beautiful sight? ♪
107
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,865
♪ Convoy ♪
108
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,158
Quit it, Dad!
109
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:50,868
Hey, good-looking,
110
00:06:50,952 --> 00:06:52,829
we'll be back
for some dinner later.
111
00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:54,247
What did you say?
112
00:06:54,330 --> 00:06:56,290
I can't understand you
with all that distortion.
113
00:06:58,459 --> 00:07:00,795
What a crappy birthday.
114
00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:03,506
You know Bart, I don't think
this is such a bad present.
115
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:06,968
Maybe you just shouldn't
talk into it as loud as your father does.
116
00:07:07,051 --> 00:07:09,262
Testing.
117
00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:10,888
Testing one-two-three.
118
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:12,098
My.
119
00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:13,433
Do I sound like that?
120
00:07:13,516 --> 00:07:14,767
Hey, it does work.
121
00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:17,353
I bet you could
have a lot of fun with this.
122
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,188
Why don't you
go show your father?
123
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,609
Chocolate.
124
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:24,693
D'
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00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:27,697
Chocolate.
126
00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:29,907
D'
127
00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:31,451
Marge, we need some more
128
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:33,953
vanilla, chocolate,
and strawberry ice cream.
129
00:07:34,036 --> 00:07:36,539
I'll get some
at the store tomorrow, Homer.
130
00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:39,333
Chocolate.
131
00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,752
People of earth,
this is Bartron...
132
00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:44,422
Commander of the Martian
invasion force.
133
00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:46,549
Your planet is in our hands.
134
00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:49,260
Resistance is useless.
135
00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:52,388
We have captured your president.
136
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:54,015
He was delicious.
137
00:07:54,098 --> 00:07:57,059
Why, you little...
138
00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:58,186
Wait a minute.
139
00:07:58,269 --> 00:07:59,896
Does this mean
you like my present?
140
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,858
Just promise me
141
00:08:03,941 --> 00:08:05,419
you won't play
any more practical jokes.
142
00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:06,569
I promise.
143
00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:16,496
Mama. Mama.
144
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:19,582
Maggie, you talked!
145
00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:21,459
Can you say "mama" again?
146
00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:22,960
Sorry, lady.
147
00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:24,795
Show's over.
148
00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:26,172
Bart.
149
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:30,009
I dreamed
I was married to Corey,
150
00:08:30,092 --> 00:08:31,677
and we lived on a pony farm,
151
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,763
and Corey was always
walking around
152
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:35,139
with his shirt off.
153
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:38,976
Brother.
154
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:45,942
Mrs. Krabapple,
that was uncalled for.
155
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:48,945
Bravo!
156
00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:50,821
Well done, old man.
157
00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:57,954
Rod, Todd, this is God.
158
00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,039
How did you get on the radio?
159
00:09:00,122 --> 00:09:01,934
What do you mean,
"how did I get on the radio"?
160
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:04,126
I created the universe,
stupid kids.
161
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,210
Forgive my brother.
162
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:06,629
We believe you.
163
00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:07,713
Talk is cheap.
164
00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:09,173
Perhaps a test of thy faith.
165
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:11,175
Walk through the wall.
166
00:09:11,259 --> 00:09:13,511
I will remove it for you...
167
00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:15,888
later.
168
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,473
What do you want from us?
169
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,849
I got a job for thee.
170
00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:20,977
Bring forth all the
cookies from your kitchen
171
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,062
and leave them
on the Simpsons' porch.
172
00:09:23,145 --> 00:09:25,064
But those cookies belong
to our parents.
173
00:09:25,147 --> 00:09:27,900
Look, do you want a happy God
174
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,902
- or a vengeful God?
- Happy God.
175
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:31,672
Then quit flapping your lip,
and make with the cookies!
176
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:33,281
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
177
00:09:39,704 --> 00:09:40,704
Whoops.
178
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,585
Help! Help!
179
00:09:45,668 --> 00:09:49,213
Sounds like trouble a-brewing
at the old well!
180
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:50,756
Help me, please.
181
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,174
I fell down the well!
182
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:53,884
I'll get help, laddie.
183
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:55,928
A little nip of courage.
184
00:10:03,978 --> 00:10:05,187
Out of my way!
185
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,189
Look out, you horse's arse!
186
00:10:08,524 --> 00:10:09,524
Sucker.
187
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,279
Hey, what's up?
188
00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:15,698
Some poor kid fell down a well.
189
00:10:15,781 --> 00:10:16,781
Yes!
190
00:10:20,119 --> 00:10:21,912
My name is Timmy O'Toole.
191
00:10:21,996 --> 00:10:23,456
I just turned ten years old.
192
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:25,124
Timmy, where are your parents?
193
00:10:25,207 --> 00:10:27,793
I have no family.
194
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,503
I tried to enroll in school,
195
00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:31,631
but your Principal Skinner
turned me away
196
00:10:31,714 --> 00:10:33,841
because of my shabby clothes.
197
00:10:33,924 --> 00:10:34,924
He's a liar.
198
00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:39,764
The circumference
of the well is 34 inches.
199
00:10:39,847 --> 00:10:41,390
So, unfortunately,
200
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:42,868
not one member of our
city's police force
201
00:10:42,892 --> 00:10:45,311
is slender enough
to rescue the boy.
202
00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:48,648
By God, men,
you're a bunch of marshmallows.
203
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:49,774
Why don't you go, Chief?
204
00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:50,858
Well, I'm too f...
205
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:52,443
important.
206
00:10:52,526 --> 00:10:54,862
Although the well
is too dark to see the boy,
207
00:10:54,945 --> 00:10:57,448
Timmy has told us his foot
is trapped under a rock.
208
00:10:57,531 --> 00:10:59,742
Thus any attempt to pull him up
209
00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:01,744
would snap him like a twig.
210
00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:03,263
In desperation,
the city is considering
211
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,081
more unorthodox solutions.
212
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,917
Grasping the child
firmly in his talons,
213
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,336
Socrates here will
fly him to safety.
214
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:11,504
Just watch.
215
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,220
I don't think he's coming back.
216
00:11:19,303 --> 00:11:22,473
With this hook
and this hunk of chocolate,
217
00:11:22,556 --> 00:11:24,141
I'll land your boy,
218
00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:26,102
and I'll clean him for free.
219
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:27,478
Although we can't reach the boy,
220
00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:29,522
we can freeze him
with liquid nitrogen
221
00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:33,401
so that future generations
can rescue him.
222
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:37,655
Dear Lord, before we peel
the foil back from your bounty,
223
00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:40,950
we ask you to watch over
little Timmy O'Toole
224
00:11:41,033 --> 00:11:42,660
trapped in that well.
225
00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:47,164
Bart, what's wrong with you?
226
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:48,958
Yeah, that Timmy is a real hero.
227
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:50,501
How do you mean, Dad?
228
00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:54,171
Well, he fell down a well
and can't get out.
229
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:56,048
How does that make him a hero?
230
00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:57,883
Well, it's more than you did.
231
00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:00,094
And finally, Channel 6's own
Krusty the Clown
232
00:12:00,177 --> 00:12:01,822
has gathered members of
the entertainment community,
233
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:04,473
who normally steer clear
of fashionable causes,
234
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:06,559
for a video called
235
00:12:06,642 --> 00:12:09,729
"We're Sending Our Love
Down the Well."
236
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:12,565
I wanted to do something
to help that boy.
237
00:12:12,648 --> 00:12:14,191
So I called my
good friend Sting.
238
00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:16,402
He said "Krusty,
when do you need me?"
239
00:12:16,485 --> 00:12:18,112
I said, "Thursday."
240
00:12:18,195 --> 00:12:19,905
He said,
"I'm busy Thursday."
241
00:12:19,989 --> 00:12:21,323
I said,
"What about Friday?"
242
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:23,409
He said, "Friday's worse
than Thursday."
243
00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:25,911
Then he said,
"How about Saturday?"
244
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,413
I said "Fine."
245
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:28,664
True story.
246
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:31,208
Yeah. I used to open
for Krusty in '69.
247
00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:33,461
In fact, he fired me
as I recall.
248
00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:37,214
Sting.
249
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,883
But this isn't
about show business.
250
00:12:38,966 --> 00:12:41,552
This is about some kid
down a hole or something.
251
00:12:41,635 --> 00:12:43,179
And we've all got to do
what we can.
252
00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:45,139
♪♪
253
00:12:45,222 --> 00:12:48,184
♪ There's a hole in my heart
as deep as a well ♪
254
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:51,562
♪ For that poor little boy
who's stuck halfway to hell ♪
255
00:12:51,645 --> 00:12:54,940
♪ Though we can't get him out,
we'll do the next best thing ♪
256
00:12:55,024 --> 00:13:00,446
♪ And go on TV
and sing, sing, sing ♪
257
00:13:00,529 --> 00:13:05,242
♪ And we're sending our love
down the well ♪
258
00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,620
♪ All the way down ♪
259
00:13:07,703 --> 00:13:12,082
♪ We're sending our love
down the well ♪
260
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:15,544
♪ Down that well ♪
261
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:18,631
Krusty, what are your plans
for the royalties?
262
00:13:18,714 --> 00:13:20,883
Well, we got to pay
for promotion, shipping,
263
00:13:20,966 --> 00:13:22,927
distribution.
264
00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:25,387
You know, those limos out back,
they aren't free.
265
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:27,640
Whatever's left,
we throw down the well.
266
00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:33,979
Authentic Timmy O'Toole
baby teeth.
267
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,689
$6.00 a bag.
268
00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:36,899
Step to the rear.
269
00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:38,984
Plenty of room in the back.
270
00:13:44,698 --> 00:13:47,952
♪ The Itchy & Scratchy Show ♪
271
00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:06,554
♪♪
272
00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:16,938
Aw.
273
00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:20,109
Drop that microphone.
274
00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:22,361
Drop it, boy!
275
00:14:22,444 --> 00:14:25,781
This is a special report
from Channel 6 News.
276
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,908
Disturbing news
from the Old Town well
277
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:29,618
where young Timmy O'Toole
278
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,996
has apparently taken
a turn for the worse.
279
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:37,084
It's very simple, Kent.
280
00:14:37,167 --> 00:14:39,169
The child is reverting
to a feral
281
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:42,923
or wolf-like state.
Here's an artist's conception.
282
00:14:43,007 --> 00:14:45,634
Bart.
283
00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:52,099
I was trying
to gnaw my foot off, but...
284
00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:53,767
I couldn't get through my sock.
285
00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,978
Good night, everybody.
286
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,229
Bart Simpson!
287
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:58,939
The thought of a boy
trapped in a well
288
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:01,692
brought out the kindness
and love of the entire community.
289
00:15:01,775 --> 00:15:03,736
When they find out
you've been fooling them,
290
00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:06,864
they're gonna want to cut
you up with rusty razors.
291
00:15:06,947 --> 00:15:09,450
Yeah? And how are they
gonna find out?
292
00:15:09,533 --> 00:15:11,410
The police will catch you,
sooner or later.
293
00:15:11,493 --> 00:15:13,787
The police.
They couldn't catch a cold.
294
00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:16,081
Maybe not, but I bet
you're stupid enough
295
00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:19,877
to have left a "Property of Bart Simpson"
label on that radio.
296
00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:26,926
D'
297
00:15:27,009 --> 00:15:28,761
"And Cinderella had
298
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:31,805
"the most beautiful gown
at the ball
299
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:34,308
"with eight satin petticoats
300
00:15:34,391 --> 00:15:37,353
each more delicate
than the last."
301
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:38,896
I think he's asleep.
302
00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:40,147
Want to get a cup of coffee?
303
00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:42,107
Okay.
Brave little guy.
304
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,542
Hey. Almost tripped
over this thing.
305
00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:14,264
What did I do to deserve this?
306
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,058
Help! Help!
307
00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:17,810
I fell down the well.
308
00:16:17,893 --> 00:16:19,228
Tell us something we don't know.
309
00:16:21,021 --> 00:16:24,108
No, my name is Bart Simpson.
310
00:16:24,191 --> 00:16:26,193
What are you doing down there?
311
00:16:26,276 --> 00:16:28,445
Look, I'll level with you.
312
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:30,197
There is no Timmy O'Toole.
313
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:34,410
It was just a prank
I was playing on everybody.
314
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,870
Well, you sure fooled us, kid.
315
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,455
Hey, I got an idea for a prank.
316
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:41,375
Let's go home and go to sleep.
317
00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:44,837
Good one, Eddie.
318
00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:47,131
Ha, ha. Great joke, guys.
319
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,137
Guys?
320
00:16:53,220 --> 00:16:56,682
So I'm afraid your son
is trapped down the well.
321
00:16:56,765 --> 00:16:59,977
You must think we're the worst
parents in the world.
322
00:17:00,060 --> 00:17:02,896
Yes, that's pretty much
the feeling down at the station.
323
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,694
Don't worry, son.
Just 'cause you're trapped in a hole
324
00:17:08,777 --> 00:17:10,988
doesn't mean you can't live
a rich and full life.
325
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:13,407
I brought you your Krusty doll.
326
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,452
Knock it off, you bald boob!
327
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:18,037
Hey! Don't make me
come down there!
328
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,246
Like to see you fit.
329
00:17:19,329 --> 00:17:20,456
Why you little...
330
00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:22,750
Put a man on him.
331
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:24,668
I like the other boy.
332
00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:25,961
So polite.
333
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:29,214
What are you doing
to save my baby boy?
334
00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:31,842
Well, ma'am, we've located
a piece of machinery
335
00:17:31,925 --> 00:17:33,177
in Shreveport, Louisiana
336
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:35,721
that could pop him out
lickety-split.
337
00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:37,389
Well, why don't you get it?
338
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,534
Well, I'm afraid we've
got a budget problem, Mrs. Simpson.
339
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:41,894
Your boy picked a bad time
to fall down a well.
340
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:44,813
Had he done it at the start of
the fiscal year, no problemo.
341
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,497
You're telling me
that the city won't pay
342
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:48,317
to get a boy out of a well?
343
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,070
Well they would have for Timmy.
People love that little guy.
344
00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:54,990
But your son, well, he kinda
played us all for a bunch of saps.
345
00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:59,745
So it seems we've all been
the victims of a cruel hoax
346
00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:02,414
perpetrated by
a ten-year-old hooligan.
347
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:03,999
The time has come
for finger pointing,
348
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,834
and most of them
are squarely aimed
349
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,252
at the boy's parents.
350
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:08,462
It's not our fault.
351
00:18:08,545 --> 00:18:09,546
We didn't want the boy.
352
00:18:09,630 --> 00:18:10,672
He was an accident.
353
00:18:10,756 --> 00:18:11,965
Homer!
354
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,051
Could you edit
that last part out?
355
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:15,653
Mr. Simpson, we're live,
coast to coast.
356
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:17,262
D'
357
00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:19,890
♪ One plus one
plus three is five ♪
358
00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:22,434
♪ Little Bart Simpson's
buried alive ♪
359
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:24,561
♪ He's so neat,
he's so sweet ♪
360
00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:26,939
♪ Now the rats
have Bart to eat... ♪
361
00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:28,022
Hey, stop that!
362
00:18:28,065 --> 00:18:29,566
Sorry, Lisa.
363
00:18:31,693 --> 00:18:33,779
♪ How many days
until Bart croaks? ♪
364
00:18:33,862 --> 00:18:35,823
♪ One, two, three, four... ♪
365
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:40,702
And our new number one hit,
"I Do Believe We're Naked"
366
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,329
by Funky See, Funky Do
367
00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,623
replaces "We're Sending
Our Love Down the Well,"
368
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:48,252
which plunges
all the way down to number 97.
369
00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,170
Ever since I called
for the rescue
370
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:52,756
of that Simpson lad,
I have taken a lot of heat,
371
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,800
so I am flip-flopping.
372
00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:57,511
I say let him stay down there.
373
00:19:04,017 --> 00:19:05,477
Yeah, Shutton here.
374
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:07,437
Now that's a story.
375
00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:19,116
Bart, honey, I made you
an extra warm sweater
376
00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:21,952
you can wear while
you're down in the well.
377
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,745
Mom, it's too big.
378
00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:25,455
Don't worry,
you'll grow into it.
379
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:26,623
Homer!
380
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:27,624
You know, I've done
381
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,251
a lot of bad stuff
through the years.
382
00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:31,670
I guess now
I'm paying the price,
383
00:19:31,753 --> 00:19:34,673
but there's so many things
I'll never get a chance to do.
384
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:36,383
Smoke a cigarette,
385
00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:38,135
Use a fake I.D.,
386
00:19:38,218 --> 00:19:41,763
Shave a swear word in my hair...
387
00:19:45,225 --> 00:19:48,520
That's all I can stands.
I can't stands no more.
388
00:19:48,604 --> 00:19:50,522
I'm going to get you
out of there myself.
389
00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:02,242
Now why didn't I think of that?
390
00:20:04,244 --> 00:20:06,622
Agnes, we've got work to do.
391
00:20:16,673 --> 00:20:19,676
This is Kent Brockman
with a special bulletin.
392
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,512
The Lincoln squirrel
has been assassinated.
393
00:20:22,596 --> 00:20:24,932
We'll stay with the story
all night, if we have to.
394
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:29,228
What's going on?
395
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:31,813
It's an old-fashioned
hole digging.
396
00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:34,233
By gar, it's been a while.
397
00:20:46,912 --> 00:20:48,163
The canary.
398
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,414
Gas!
399
00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:50,916
Out of the hole!
400
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:56,255
Gentlemen, this canary
died of natural causes.
401
00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:58,006
Back in the hole!
402
00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:03,929
Sting, you look tired.
403
00:21:04,012 --> 00:21:05,472
Maybe you should take a rest.
404
00:21:05,555 --> 00:21:08,350
Not while one
of my fans needs me.
405
00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:11,233
Actually, I don't know if I've ever heard
Bart play one of your albums.
406
00:21:11,311 --> 00:21:14,523
Shh! Marge,
he's a good digger.
407
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:19,903
Sting!
408
00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:22,281
Mom! Dad!
409
00:21:22,364 --> 00:21:24,866
Bart, I've missed you so much.
410
00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:29,246
Man, I was so scared.
411
00:21:29,329 --> 00:21:30,831
Don't worry, son.
412
00:21:30,914 --> 00:21:32,291
They're going to make sure
413
00:21:32,374 --> 00:21:35,043
no one ever falls down
this well again.
414
00:21:39,214 --> 00:21:40,716
That should do it.
415
00:21:46,638 --> 00:21:50,225
♪♪
416
00:22:50,452 --> 00:22:51,578
Shh!
417
00:22:55,290 --> 00:22:58,502
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.
28992
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