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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:26,434 --> 00:01:29,263 Where? Where did you see it? 2 00:01:29,263 --> 00:01:32,309 This way? Did it go in here? In here? 3 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,487 Ah, there it is. 4 00:01:45,975 --> 00:01:48,412 Who closes the door, keeps the door. 5 00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:51,328 No. You can't do this. 6 00:01:51,328 --> 00:01:52,112 - No! 7 00:04:01,458 --> 00:04:03,591 What? No... 8 00:04:03,591 --> 00:04:05,375 No, no, no, no, no, no, no! 9 00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:08,813 Oh, bloody alarm! 10 00:04:27,397 --> 00:04:28,920 - No! 11 00:04:35,449 --> 00:04:36,493 Neville! 12 00:04:40,454 --> 00:04:42,020 Kidding me! 13 00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:06,567 Thank you. 14 00:05:11,398 --> 00:05:12,747 What the...? 15 00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:15,445 Oh! 16 00:05:18,187 --> 00:05:19,493 Excuse me. Sorry. 17 00:05:22,191 --> 00:05:23,323 Sorry. 18 00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:31,505 Sorry. 19 00:05:31,505 --> 00:05:32,767 Sorry, guys. Excuse me. 20 00:05:35,204 --> 00:05:37,641 Sorry. Hi. Is this the line for applicants? 21 00:05:37,641 --> 00:05:39,513 - Join the queue. - Oh, thank you. 22 00:05:42,951 --> 00:05:45,170 Excuse me. Sorry. Are you here for the barista job? 23 00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:47,085 Paul? Paul Carpenter? 24 00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:50,262 It is you! 25 00:05:50,262 --> 00:05:52,917 Thought it wasn't you for a minute. 26 00:05:52,917 --> 00:05:55,006 Here's me calling out to a stranger. 27 00:05:56,268 --> 00:05:57,574 Monty Smith-Gregg. 28 00:05:57,574 --> 00:05:59,837 Don't you dare tell me you don't remember me. 29 00:05:59,837 --> 00:06:02,013 - Um... - You don't? Or you do? 30 00:06:02,013 --> 00:06:03,580 I can't tell with that funny face of yours. 31 00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,408 You always had that look in class. 32 00:06:05,408 --> 00:06:08,846 I taught 18th-century Ethics and History of Music. 33 00:06:08,846 --> 00:06:11,371 - At King's. - Oh, I didn't go to King's. 34 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,198 And other campuses. 35 00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:14,939 I had long hair and a beard. 36 00:06:14,939 --> 00:06:16,506 You used to sit next to Neville. 37 00:06:16,506 --> 00:06:17,420 - Yes... - Funny Neville 38 00:06:17,420 --> 00:06:19,422 with his weak knees. 39 00:06:19,422 --> 00:06:22,512 Plus I coached you in football, Mr. Forgetty! 40 00:06:22,512 --> 00:06:25,210 This is such a coincidence! 41 00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:27,212 You still got that shirt? The one with the, uh... 42 00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:29,519 Oh, what did it say? I should go. 43 00:06:29,519 --> 00:06:32,043 - How's your brother? - I don't have a brother. 44 00:06:32,043 --> 00:06:35,220 Anyway, must dash. I have an interview, just like you. 45 00:06:35,220 --> 00:06:36,700 Another coincidence! 46 00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:38,310 - Bye! - Bye. 47 00:06:41,618 --> 00:06:42,619 Monty? 48 00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:47,232 Oh... 49 00:06:54,588 --> 00:06:57,112 Oh, great... 50 00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:58,505 - Hey! 51 00:06:59,636 --> 00:07:00,463 Wait! 52 00:07:03,901 --> 00:07:07,122 Stop! Grab that dog! Hey! 53 00:07:59,130 --> 00:08:00,958 Hello? 54 00:08:04,396 --> 00:08:06,747 Central London organization... 55 00:08:24,721 --> 00:08:27,332 With world's best practice... 56 00:08:29,987 --> 00:08:32,860 Excuse me, but are you here for the job interview? 57 00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:35,166 It says "applicants" on the door, but... 58 00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:37,038 this is an odd place for a job interview. 59 00:08:39,214 --> 00:08:41,172 I was actually supposed to have an interview at a cafe, 60 00:08:41,172 --> 00:08:43,000 which is interesting... 61 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,915 mildly. 62 00:08:44,915 --> 00:08:47,657 D-do you know what they do here? 63 00:08:47,657 --> 00:08:49,746 - Or what position...? I'm sorry. 64 00:08:49,746 --> 00:08:51,705 Is there something I'm doing to make you want to talk to me? 65 00:08:51,705 --> 00:08:54,185 - Pardon? - I really need to focus. 66 00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:55,752 Sorry. 67 00:08:55,752 --> 00:08:58,059 Oh, of course. Yeah. You should focus. 68 00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,367 Oh, you... you're watching. 69 00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:04,848 Maybe I... I should just watch too. 70 00:09:04,848 --> 00:09:07,024 We've always been there... 71 00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:09,549 - ...and always will. 72 00:09:11,638 --> 00:09:14,205 Life at JW Wells as a new recruit 73 00:09:14,205 --> 00:09:15,772 is never dull. 74 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:17,557 On the contrary, 75 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:21,038 the jobs can be demanding and often confronting. 76 00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:22,605 We may not advertise our services 77 00:09:22,605 --> 00:09:24,607 and shout our name from the rooftops, 78 00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:27,305 but that is because we do not need to. 79 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:30,787 Our reputation is already well established, 80 00:09:30,787 --> 00:09:32,789 which is why we can hide in the shadows 81 00:09:32,789 --> 00:09:34,617 waiting for business to come to us. 82 00:09:36,445 --> 00:09:37,881 Now you know a bit about what we do here 83 00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:40,623 at JW Wells and Company, 84 00:09:40,623 --> 00:09:42,625 we hope you will join our team. 85 00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:50,415 No, you were... you were outstanding, my dear. 86 00:09:50,415 --> 00:09:52,156 Mr. Wells was very impressed. 87 00:09:52,156 --> 00:09:53,984 - We all were. - That's a relief. 88 00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:55,464 He's a personal hero of mine, you know. 89 00:09:55,464 --> 00:09:56,813 Yes. 90 00:09:56,813 --> 00:10:00,034 Oh, good luck! Just have fun with it. 91 00:10:01,383 --> 00:10:03,733 These other interviews are just formalities. 92 00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:05,779 The job is all but yours. 93 00:10:08,129 --> 00:10:11,262 Paul Carpenter! 94 00:10:11,262 --> 00:10:12,829 What...? M-me? 95 00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:15,963 How does he know my name? 96 00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:19,575 Chop-chop! 97 00:10:27,670 --> 00:10:29,629 So, what is it you do here? 98 00:10:31,805 --> 00:10:33,284 We do what we can. 99 00:10:33,284 --> 00:10:34,721 Right. 100 00:10:46,907 --> 00:10:48,299 Mr. Wells, 101 00:10:48,299 --> 00:10:49,997 ladies and gentlemen of the board, 102 00:10:49,997 --> 00:10:52,216 this is Paul Carpenter. 103 00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:54,349 Well, glad you found us. 104 00:10:55,393 --> 00:10:58,048 The side entrance is a bit tricky, but... 105 00:10:58,048 --> 00:11:01,138 Apologies about the lobby being renovated. 106 00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:02,705 It's all to align with the 107 00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:05,490 "new dawn" of our great company. 108 00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:08,319 You will be part of that new dawn, too. 109 00:11:08,319 --> 00:11:10,844 - I will be? - Well, you could be. 110 00:11:10,844 --> 00:11:12,323 It all rather depends on the next two minutes, 111 00:11:12,323 --> 00:11:13,803 wouldn't you say? 112 00:11:13,803 --> 00:11:15,892 - Right. - Why don't you tell us 113 00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:17,851 something about yourself, Paul? 114 00:11:17,851 --> 00:11:20,854 Ah... there's not much to tell, really. 115 00:11:20,854 --> 00:11:23,508 I've got four GCSEs and two A-Levels. 116 00:11:23,508 --> 00:11:25,336 I'm currently between employment. 117 00:11:25,336 --> 00:11:26,860 Single. 118 00:11:26,860 --> 00:11:29,558 I live with a friend, Neville, who hasn't paid 119 00:11:29,558 --> 00:11:31,038 his half of the rent for 2 months, but let's not 120 00:11:31,038 --> 00:11:32,604 hold that against him, even though it does mean 121 00:11:32,604 --> 00:11:34,084 we'll be probably be evicted unless I get this job. 122 00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:36,870 Well, a job. 123 00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:38,741 It's highly unlikely that I get this job... 124 00:11:38,741 --> 00:11:40,743 especially if I keep talking. But I'd like it. 125 00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:42,919 You know, whatever it is. It seems... 126 00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,138 interesting. 127 00:11:45,879 --> 00:11:48,925 Anyway, yeah, that's... me. 128 00:11:48,925 --> 00:11:51,406 And what makes you think you'd be suited to this position? 129 00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:55,410 I dunno. 130 00:11:55,410 --> 00:11:56,933 Well, what made you apply? 131 00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:59,936 Uh, coincidence, really. 132 00:11:59,936 --> 00:12:01,198 Go on. 133 00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:02,939 Well, my alarm didn't go off. 134 00:12:02,939 --> 00:12:04,549 My trousers had a stain. 135 00:12:04,549 --> 00:12:06,900 My shoelace broke, twice. 136 00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:09,206 A dog stole my scarf. The toaster blew up. 137 00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:11,208 I ran into someone who used to teach me at university 138 00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:12,557 although I don't remember him at all 139 00:12:12,557 --> 00:12:14,646 and then I chased the dog, and here I am. 140 00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:18,563 - Any hobbies? - Pardon? 141 00:12:18,563 --> 00:12:20,740 What do you do in your spare time? 142 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:23,307 Well, all my time is spare, really. 143 00:12:23,307 --> 00:12:24,874 - Ah. - But I used to paint 144 00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:26,571 - model soldiers. Which period? 145 00:12:26,571 --> 00:12:29,574 Medieval. I also did those fantasy ones. 146 00:12:29,574 --> 00:12:31,925 - Trolls and goblins. - Goblins? 147 00:12:31,925 --> 00:12:33,796 I tried Napoleonic, but they were too fiddly. 148 00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:35,276 I see. 149 00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:37,931 I don't do that so much now. 150 00:12:37,931 --> 00:12:39,889 And what do you most admire 151 00:12:39,889 --> 00:12:42,239 about the works of Chekhov? 152 00:12:42,239 --> 00:12:44,981 Ah... dunno. 153 00:12:44,981 --> 00:12:46,417 The way he says "Course laid in, Captain" 154 00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:47,984 is pretty cool. 155 00:12:47,984 --> 00:12:49,246 But mostly he doesn't get to do much. 156 00:12:49,246 --> 00:12:51,727 - Chekhov the playwright. 157 00:12:52,946 --> 00:12:55,426 - "Star Trek." - Any languages? 158 00:12:55,426 --> 00:12:56,601 Uh, French and German at school, 159 00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:59,996 but I can't really... 160 00:12:59,996 --> 00:13:00,954 remember any of it now. 161 00:13:04,609 --> 00:13:06,133 - Sorry? - Casimir is asking you 162 00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,699 about your social life, pumpkin. 163 00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:13,140 Pardon? 164 00:13:13,140 --> 00:13:15,142 What are you looking at, Mr. Carpenter? 165 00:13:15,142 --> 00:13:18,710 Oh, sorry. Uh, it's nothing. It's... 166 00:13:18,710 --> 00:13:20,190 You seem distracted. 167 00:13:22,018 --> 00:13:24,151 It's just the wallpaper. 168 00:13:24,151 --> 00:13:26,806 The cracks are a map of London. 169 00:13:29,678 --> 00:13:32,463 The Tube. 170 00:13:32,463 --> 00:13:34,944 And there's the M25. 171 00:13:34,944 --> 00:13:36,206 There's Hyde Park. 172 00:13:37,991 --> 00:13:39,906 As soon as you see it, you can't unsee it. 173 00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:44,258 It's like one of those Magic Eye things. 174 00:13:51,004 --> 00:13:53,876 Well, this has been a truly forgettable experience. 175 00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:55,965 Shall I see you out, Mr. Carpenter? 176 00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:56,879 - Oh, that's OK. - Yes, I shall. 177 00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:58,054 - Sorry. - Come on. 178 00:13:58,054 --> 00:13:59,882 Well, thanks for meeting you all. 179 00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:03,059 Um, good to... I mean, to meet you. 180 00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:04,974 We heard it. Thank you. 181 00:14:19,510 --> 00:14:21,034 You... 182 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:25,342 Stay... 183 00:14:25,342 --> 00:14:26,778 Stay. 184 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:36,745 - All right? 185 00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:40,096 Oh, dear. 186 00:14:40,096 --> 00:14:42,098 How is anyone supposed to get a job in this town? 187 00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:44,927 You should just go abroad. You know, be a man of letters. 188 00:14:44,927 --> 00:14:48,365 Paul Carpenter-- renaissance man. 189 00:14:48,365 --> 00:14:52,108 Renaissance men usually have more than £5 to their name. 190 00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:53,457 Any ladies there? 191 00:14:53,457 --> 00:14:54,806 No. 192 00:14:54,806 --> 00:14:56,896 Liar. Spill. 193 00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:00,421 Neville? 194 00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:03,946 - Hmm? - What's going on? 195 00:15:03,946 --> 00:15:05,948 Yeah, the couch is gone. 196 00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:07,819 Yes, I noticed that. 197 00:15:07,819 --> 00:15:09,734 I'm moving home. 198 00:15:09,734 --> 00:15:13,129 - What?! Like, right now? - I'm sorry. I just... 199 00:15:13,129 --> 00:15:15,915 Just, do you ever feel like you're not meant for 200 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,221 this kind of, you know, "work, rent, bills, bus, 201 00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:20,310 Tube, bills, work, rent" kind of life? 202 00:15:20,310 --> 00:15:21,746 Yes, of course! We all do. 203 00:15:21,746 --> 00:15:23,096 Well, I had this amazing epiphany last night. 204 00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:24,836 I thought, "Neville, why are you being 205 00:15:24,836 --> 00:15:26,751 a slave to the system?" 206 00:15:26,751 --> 00:15:28,840 You know, "Go home, go back to university, 207 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:31,104 just... never leave again." 208 00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:32,496 Right. And you know what? 209 00:15:32,496 --> 00:15:34,977 As soon as I said it, I just felt... 210 00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:37,066 free. 211 00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,068 Wow. I'm really happy for you. 212 00:15:39,068 --> 00:15:40,591 But where does that leave me? 213 00:15:40,591 --> 00:15:41,984 We're all individuals, Paul. 214 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,986 You are free to make your own choices, mate. 215 00:15:43,986 --> 00:15:45,770 Ignoring the fact I don't have a job 216 00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:46,858 and my parents have moved to Florida. 217 00:15:46,858 --> 00:15:47,990 Yeah, ignoring that. 218 00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:49,252 I can't believe this, Neville! 219 00:15:49,252 --> 00:15:51,080 I know, I'm gonna miss you too. 220 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:52,864 No! I mean, how am I meant to find someone with zero notice? 221 00:15:52,864 --> 00:15:54,170 I'll pay for next week. 222 00:15:54,170 --> 00:15:55,519 You're already two months behind! 223 00:15:55,519 --> 00:15:56,651 All right, well, maybe you'll get... 224 00:16:05,138 --> 00:16:07,357 "JW Wells and Co"? 225 00:16:07,357 --> 00:16:09,794 That's where my interview was. 226 00:16:09,794 --> 00:16:12,014 But I didn't give them this address. 227 00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:13,885 "Dear Mr. Carpenter, "Thank you for 228 00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:17,106 "your smashing interview at 9:43am today. 229 00:16:17,106 --> 00:16:20,370 "It was a real highlight and we were unanimously impressed. 230 00:16:20,370 --> 00:16:22,024 "We are therefore thrilled to offer you 231 00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:24,157 "the position of Paid Intern. 232 00:16:24,157 --> 00:16:25,854 "It would be most agreeable if you could make yourself 233 00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:29,466 "available for work from tomorrow, 9:00 am sharp. 234 00:16:29,466 --> 00:16:31,251 "Please enter through the main entrance at 70 St Mary..." 235 00:16:32,730 --> 00:16:35,124 Bloody hell. I got a job! 236 00:16:35,124 --> 00:16:37,648 You see? All works out in the end. 237 00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:41,304 I got a job! 238 00:17:16,731 --> 00:17:17,732 Thank you. 239 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:20,534 Mr. Roden! 240 00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,192 Referral, please. 241 00:18:31,632 --> 00:18:32,720 Ew. 242 00:18:34,722 --> 00:18:36,071 Suite 1409. 243 00:18:41,294 --> 00:18:44,340 What's the matter? Need help sitting? 244 00:18:44,340 --> 00:18:46,342 - Oh, I'm... I'm not... 245 00:18:46,342 --> 00:18:48,214 Ah! 246 00:18:50,346 --> 00:18:51,782 Hm? 247 00:18:51,782 --> 00:18:54,307 Well, Rosie, what do we think of the new lobby? 248 00:18:54,307 --> 00:18:56,352 Oh, Mr. Wells, 249 00:18:56,352 --> 00:18:58,180 I was expecting to be pleased, 250 00:18:58,180 --> 00:19:00,530 but this morning, when I saw it for the first time, 251 00:19:00,530 --> 00:19:03,968 my heart burst with a new passion for my work. 252 00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:05,622 I can't tell if you're being serious. 253 00:19:05,622 --> 00:19:08,190 I couldn't be more serious... 254 00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:09,235 about the new lobby. 255 00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:14,196 - Carpenter! - Hi. 256 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:16,981 - Wearing a suit, I see. - Mm. 257 00:19:16,981 --> 00:19:18,983 Very nice. Making an effort--tick. 258 00:19:18,983 --> 00:19:21,377 Trying to be yourself-- bigger tick. 259 00:19:21,377 --> 00:19:24,163 We're all a big happy family here, aren't we, Rosie? 260 00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:28,384 - Yes? - One big happy family. 261 00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:31,387 We're going to tear through mountains together. 262 00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:33,824 - Paul? - Paul. Ah, OK. 263 00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:36,044 Well, I love to tear... mountains. 264 00:19:43,094 --> 00:19:44,705 Paul Carpenter. 265 00:19:46,924 --> 00:19:48,883 Last chance to change your mind. 266 00:19:53,104 --> 00:19:57,108 Mr. Tanner, the new intern's here. 267 00:19:57,108 --> 00:19:58,762 No, she's here already, Mum. 268 00:19:58,762 --> 00:20:00,242 Uh, I mean "Rosie." 269 00:20:01,461 --> 00:20:03,027 Well, they're coming in thick and fast 270 00:20:03,027 --> 00:20:04,594 'cause there's another one here with a clueless look 271 00:20:04,594 --> 00:20:05,726 on his face. 272 00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:08,772 I don't suppose you could fill me in 273 00:20:08,772 --> 00:20:10,818 on what this company actually does? 274 00:20:22,743 --> 00:20:24,397 Carpenter. 275 00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:27,922 I was hoping that you'd died. 276 00:20:29,315 --> 00:20:30,707 Well, follow me. 277 00:20:30,707 --> 00:20:32,231 - Chop-chop! - Dennis! 278 00:20:33,928 --> 00:20:34,798 Shirt. 279 00:20:34,798 --> 00:20:35,756 Oh, yes. 280 00:20:36,974 --> 00:20:39,194 Come on. Hurry up! Come on! 281 00:20:42,589 --> 00:20:44,243 For God's sake... 282 00:20:46,941 --> 00:20:48,377 No, not that way... 283 00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:53,252 Why is the...? 284 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:55,906 Ah, all this was meant to be done by Christmas! 285 00:20:55,906 --> 00:20:57,604 By Christmas! 286 00:20:59,345 --> 00:21:03,087 Now... interns report to me and me only. 287 00:21:03,087 --> 00:21:04,741 - Is that clear? - OK. Yes. 288 00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:07,266 "Yes, Mr. Tanner." 289 00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:11,313 Now, JW Wells is a highly respected firm. 290 00:21:11,313 --> 00:21:13,272 Oops! 291 00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,404 And we expect nothing less than excellence 292 00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:17,319 from our employees. 293 00:21:17,319 --> 00:21:19,103 - Is that clear? - Of course. 294 00:21:19,103 --> 00:21:21,280 "Of course, Mr. Tanner"! 295 00:21:22,803 --> 00:21:25,675 Now, in return, you will be working 296 00:21:25,675 --> 00:21:27,851 for the most innovative company in history. 297 00:21:27,851 --> 00:21:29,200 Hup! 298 00:21:30,811 --> 00:21:32,378 Don't panic. 299 00:21:38,471 --> 00:21:40,473 All clear, no harm done. 300 00:21:40,473 --> 00:21:42,518 With me, boy. 301 00:21:44,694 --> 00:21:46,348 Now listen very carefully. 302 00:21:46,348 --> 00:21:48,437 This is really all you need to know. 303 00:21:48,437 --> 00:21:52,136 For centuries, our distinguished firm, JW... 304 00:21:52,136 --> 00:21:53,355 Oh, thank you, thank you. 305 00:21:53,355 --> 00:21:55,531 Our distinguished firm, JW Wells, 306 00:21:55,531 --> 00:21:57,620 has performed a plethora 307 00:21:57,620 --> 00:22:01,450 of invaluable services for our clients, including... 308 00:22:01,450 --> 00:22:03,626 - I didn't quite hear... 309 00:22:03,626 --> 00:22:06,325 ...temporal pausation or advancement 310 00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:08,196 and, of course, our signature dish, 311 00:22:08,196 --> 00:22:10,546 which is coincidensation. 312 00:22:10,546 --> 00:22:13,332 Now, we have never had an unhappy client. 313 00:22:17,553 --> 00:22:19,773 And we trust it will remain that way. 314 00:22:21,035 --> 00:22:23,646 If you decide to stay, you arrive at 0900, 315 00:22:23,646 --> 00:22:26,997 lunch is at 1300, tea 1500, 316 00:22:26,997 --> 00:22:29,696 and pens down at 5 o'clock. 317 00:22:29,696 --> 00:22:32,481 And I don't care how much of a suckhole you are, 318 00:22:32,481 --> 00:22:36,050 you never, ever stay after hours. 319 00:22:36,050 --> 00:22:38,182 - Is that clear? - Yes. 320 00:22:38,182 --> 00:22:40,271 - Mr. Tanner. - Thank you. 321 00:22:46,452 --> 00:22:48,932 You look like the sort of chap who owns a computer. 322 00:22:48,932 --> 00:22:51,065 Do not bring it to work. 323 00:22:51,065 --> 00:22:53,372 - Hurry along! 324 00:22:53,372 --> 00:22:55,417 They do not function within these four walls, 325 00:22:55,417 --> 00:22:57,463 and what is more, they're common. 326 00:22:59,900 --> 00:23:01,510 - Any questions? - I just didn't quite hear... 327 00:23:01,510 --> 00:23:02,598 No questions. Good. 328 00:23:04,470 --> 00:23:08,212 You may be excited about working here. 329 00:23:08,212 --> 00:23:10,519 That would be a mistake. 330 00:23:10,519 --> 00:23:13,740 You are the lowest of the low, Mr. Carpenter. 331 00:23:16,482 --> 00:23:18,309 I can't think of anything lower. 332 00:23:18,309 --> 00:23:20,050 Even the tiniest mites 333 00:23:20,050 --> 00:23:21,791 that inhabit this grotty carpet 334 00:23:21,791 --> 00:23:25,316 upon which we walk are more important than you. 335 00:23:25,316 --> 00:23:26,883 And, like the mites, 336 00:23:26,883 --> 00:23:29,756 the less you are seen, the longer you will last. 337 00:23:29,756 --> 00:23:30,626 Right. 338 00:23:30,626 --> 00:23:32,541 "Right, Mr. Tanner!" 339 00:23:32,541 --> 00:23:33,455 +Mr. Tanner. 340 00:23:34,761 --> 00:23:37,416 Now... you'll be sharing 341 00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:39,461 with the other new blob of insignificance 342 00:23:39,461 --> 00:23:40,462 that arrived today. 343 00:23:40,462 --> 00:23:41,768 Oh. What other blob? 344 00:23:43,509 --> 00:23:44,466 This one. 345 00:23:46,337 --> 00:23:47,643 Sophie Pettingel. 346 00:23:47,643 --> 00:23:49,906 She managed to get here on time. 347 00:23:49,906 --> 00:23:51,430 Well, wait here. 348 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:52,474 Maybe someone will find you something to do. 349 00:23:52,474 --> 00:23:54,563 Oh! 350 00:23:54,563 --> 00:23:56,652 Why don't you tell Sophie about your last girlfriend? 351 00:23:57,653 --> 00:24:00,351 Oh, that's right. You've never had one. 352 00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,837 That's not true, by the way. 353 00:24:07,837 --> 00:24:10,492 I have had... 354 00:24:10,492 --> 00:24:12,581 We never called each other boyfriend and girlfriend... 355 00:24:12,581 --> 00:24:13,495 The smell of coffee makes me sick. 356 00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:16,193 The what? Oh. Sorry. 357 00:24:23,331 --> 00:24:25,986 Ah... Oh, that's hot. Very... 358 00:24:31,165 --> 00:24:32,166 Ah. 359 00:24:57,104 --> 00:24:58,671 Looks like we were up for the same job. 360 00:24:58,671 --> 00:25:00,107 Hm. 361 00:25:01,325 --> 00:25:03,327 Yeah, I'm pretty sure they made a mistake, actually. 362 00:25:03,327 --> 00:25:05,329 All depends on what they were looking for. 363 00:25:05,329 --> 00:25:06,679 If it was inarticulate, nervous gits 364 00:25:06,679 --> 00:25:07,984 with little talent or initiative, 365 00:25:07,984 --> 00:25:09,203 they've struck gold. 366 00:25:11,248 --> 00:25:13,729 With me... I mean. Not you. 367 00:25:13,729 --> 00:25:17,037 You're obviously talented and... not a git. 368 00:25:23,696 --> 00:25:25,219 Do you have any idea what they do here? 369 00:25:26,612 --> 00:25:28,178 With all those typists? 370 00:25:28,178 --> 00:25:30,398 And the big map with the...? 371 00:25:31,791 --> 00:25:33,706 There's a nice pub across the street, which is good. 372 00:25:33,706 --> 00:25:36,099 It's important, isn't it? To have after-work drinks. 373 00:25:36,099 --> 00:25:39,015 Or hitting-target drinks. Or sales drinks. 374 00:25:39,015 --> 00:25:42,671 Or, like... drink drinks. 375 00:25:42,671 --> 00:25:44,847 My dad used to go to the pub after work every day. 376 00:25:44,847 --> 00:25:47,241 So did my mum, actually. "Debeef" drinks. 377 00:25:47,241 --> 00:25:49,199 Debrief "dinks." Drinks. 378 00:25:49,199 --> 00:25:50,723 Debrief drinks. 379 00:25:51,854 --> 00:25:53,595 Did you work anywhere before this job? 380 00:25:53,595 --> 00:25:56,467 Um, what kind of question is that? 381 00:25:56,467 --> 00:25:58,731 Oh, uh, I was just wondering if 382 00:25:58,731 --> 00:26:01,124 all office jobs are like this. 383 00:26:01,124 --> 00:26:03,910 You know, you sort of sit and wait to be told. 384 00:26:03,910 --> 00:26:06,782 Or maybe you could fill me in on some work practices. 385 00:26:08,784 --> 00:26:10,046 You know, like when to... 386 00:26:10,046 --> 00:26:11,744 Go to the pub? 387 00:26:11,744 --> 00:26:13,223 What? No. 388 00:26:13,223 --> 00:26:15,617 Um... unless you want to. 389 00:26:15,617 --> 00:26:17,793 But-but not in an inappropriate way, of course. 390 00:26:17,793 --> 00:26:20,230 If there's a way to do it... if... 391 00:26:20,230 --> 00:26:21,754 'Cause, I mean, I can't, and don't want to, 392 00:26:21,754 --> 00:26:22,929 by the way, ask. 393 00:26:22,929 --> 00:26:24,757 And neither do you want to be asked, 394 00:26:24,757 --> 00:26:26,889 or ask me, which is good. 395 00:26:26,889 --> 00:26:29,500 We've got apps for that. 396 00:26:29,500 --> 00:26:31,154 And I'm certainly not gonna look for you on my app. 397 00:26:31,154 --> 00:26:32,591 I think you should stop now. 398 00:26:32,591 --> 00:26:33,635 Yeah, I think you're right. 399 00:26:33,635 --> 00:26:35,594 What?! 400 00:26:35,594 --> 00:26:36,464 Shh. 401 00:26:59,705 --> 00:27:01,489 - Did she try and kiss you? - No. 402 00:27:01,489 --> 00:27:03,186 - No. - Oh. 403 00:27:03,186 --> 00:27:05,449 Shame. 404 00:27:05,449 --> 00:27:07,234 Did you see a baby dragon? 405 00:27:09,802 --> 00:27:11,020 Job for you. 406 00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:16,460 You are to go through these maps 407 00:27:16,460 --> 00:27:19,463 and circle any sites containing bauxite. 408 00:27:19,463 --> 00:27:21,640 - Got it? - And what about me? 409 00:27:22,728 --> 00:27:23,990 You help him. 410 00:27:25,339 --> 00:27:26,688 Oh. 411 00:27:26,688 --> 00:27:28,777 Look at you. 412 00:27:28,777 --> 00:27:30,692 You're all red in the face. 413 00:27:30,692 --> 00:27:32,825 First days, they're always hard. 414 00:27:32,825 --> 00:27:35,349 But I'm here, hm? 415 00:27:35,349 --> 00:27:37,351 If you need a true friend. 416 00:27:41,007 --> 00:27:42,704 Mm. 417 00:27:42,704 --> 00:27:44,837 Anyway, good luck. 418 00:27:52,366 --> 00:27:54,716 So... bauxite is...? 419 00:27:54,716 --> 00:27:56,152 It's a mineral. 420 00:27:56,152 --> 00:27:57,588 They make aluminium out of it. 421 00:27:57,588 --> 00:27:58,981 - Listen, Peter... - Paul. 422 00:27:58,981 --> 00:28:00,548 don't take this the wrong way 423 00:28:00,548 --> 00:28:02,332 but I'm not really interested in beers after work 424 00:28:02,332 --> 00:28:04,073 or, "Hi, everyone, this is my new mate Peter from work." 425 00:28:04,073 --> 00:28:05,727 Paul. 426 00:28:05,727 --> 00:28:07,076 I'm part of a fast-track program 427 00:28:07,076 --> 00:28:08,730 to upper level management, so we won't be sharing 428 00:28:08,730 --> 00:28:10,819 this pokey little hole for long, but while we are, 429 00:28:10,819 --> 00:28:13,517 do you mind if we just...? 430 00:28:15,519 --> 00:28:17,391 Yep. Sure. Yeah. 431 00:28:17,391 --> 00:28:19,349 I was just... 432 00:28:19,349 --> 00:28:21,569 checking about... the bauxite. 433 00:29:12,794 --> 00:29:14,665 Well, that was rewarding. 434 00:29:16,624 --> 00:29:18,365 Didn't spot any bauxite, did you? 435 00:29:22,282 --> 00:29:23,457 Coming? 436 00:29:26,112 --> 00:29:27,156 What we thinking for lunch? 437 00:29:27,156 --> 00:29:28,984 I could murder a pie. 438 00:29:28,984 --> 00:29:30,812 Oh, I'm a bit of a pie-murderer myself. 439 00:29:30,812 --> 00:29:32,466 Actually, I might just grab a coffee. 440 00:29:33,989 --> 00:29:34,860 I thought you didn't like coffee. 441 00:29:36,296 --> 00:29:38,385 Why did I say that? I hate coffee. 442 00:29:39,603 --> 00:29:41,910 Sophie Pettingel! I have a quick job for you. 443 00:29:41,910 --> 00:29:44,304 You can come too if you like, but don't do anything. 444 00:29:50,484 --> 00:29:51,615 I don't suppose you could fill us in 445 00:29:51,615 --> 00:29:53,313 on what this company actually does? 446 00:29:56,707 --> 00:29:58,100 This should be very simple. 447 00:29:58,100 --> 00:30:01,103 Ah. That woman is Delia Bryson. 448 00:30:01,103 --> 00:30:02,191 She happens to be sitting... 449 00:30:05,325 --> 00:30:07,240 Spelling is awful. 450 00:30:08,981 --> 00:30:11,897 Right. Well, this seems to be a little more complicated. 451 00:30:14,508 --> 00:30:16,989 Delia is reading "Atonement" by Ian McEwan. 452 00:30:16,989 --> 00:30:18,817 Sophie, I'll need you to watch her 453 00:30:18,817 --> 00:30:20,296 and signal me when she gets to the part 454 00:30:20,296 --> 00:30:22,037 where Cecilia jumps into the fountain. 455 00:30:22,037 --> 00:30:24,692 - The what? - I'll be on the other side. 456 00:30:24,692 --> 00:30:27,477 Wait. You want me to read over her shoulder? 457 00:30:27,477 --> 00:30:29,740 Of course not. That would be rude. 458 00:30:29,740 --> 00:30:31,438 Just watch her from in there. 459 00:30:43,058 --> 00:30:44,886 How are we supposed to know what she's reading? 460 00:30:47,541 --> 00:30:49,673 This is ridiculous. 461 00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:20,008 Oh, my goodness! 462 00:31:20,008 --> 00:31:21,923 - Are you all right? Yeah. 463 00:31:21,923 --> 00:31:23,751 - Here. - Oh. 464 00:31:23,751 --> 00:31:26,710 - Oh... - Oh, thank you so much. 465 00:31:26,710 --> 00:31:29,539 Such a bizarre coincidence... 466 00:31:29,539 --> 00:31:31,150 Very well done, Sophie. 467 00:31:32,934 --> 00:31:34,936 His parents paid a fortune for that. 468 00:31:34,936 --> 00:31:36,459 Those two will think it was meant to be 469 00:31:36,459 --> 00:31:38,461 and hopefully tell the story to their grandchildren. 470 00:31:38,461 --> 00:31:41,073 But... so Sophie read her mind? 471 00:31:41,073 --> 00:31:44,032 Sophie is a Seer, a very rare breed. 472 00:31:44,032 --> 00:31:46,121 That's why she's in our fast-track program 473 00:31:46,121 --> 00:31:47,993 and you, Paul, are not. 474 00:31:50,952 --> 00:31:53,085 I suppose you'd call us practical metaphysicians 475 00:31:53,085 --> 00:31:55,957 or paranatural engineers. 476 00:31:55,957 --> 00:31:58,829 In my department, we hijack a client's instincts 477 00:31:58,829 --> 00:32:00,570 or gut feeling just long enough 478 00:32:00,570 --> 00:32:02,964 to influence a correct decision. 479 00:32:02,964 --> 00:32:05,967 Sophie, I have more clients for you. 480 00:32:05,967 --> 00:32:07,142 Paul, 481 00:32:07,142 --> 00:32:09,492 you can go back to... 482 00:32:09,492 --> 00:32:10,929 whatever it was you were doing. Maps. 483 00:32:12,017 --> 00:32:13,366 Fast-track. 484 00:33:01,849 --> 00:33:03,285 Bauxite... 485 00:33:03,285 --> 00:33:04,417 Brilliant. 486 00:33:40,279 --> 00:33:42,585 Carpenter! Here. 487 00:33:42,585 --> 00:33:45,588 Focus your eyes on a point in the distance, 488 00:33:45,588 --> 00:33:47,242 Like you're looking at the horizon. 489 00:33:48,548 --> 00:33:49,375 Yeah. 490 00:33:50,724 --> 00:33:55,946 Now lift your hand just off the map 491 00:33:55,946 --> 00:33:58,079 so you can still feel it 492 00:33:58,079 --> 00:33:59,994 but you're not actually touching it. 493 00:34:09,917 --> 00:34:11,397 Yeah. 494 00:34:12,615 --> 00:34:16,097 Yeah. Mm-hm. 495 00:34:16,097 --> 00:34:17,577 Yeah, it's building. 496 00:34:21,233 --> 00:34:23,017 That's a Quiver Point. 497 00:34:26,499 --> 00:34:27,674 Come with me. 498 00:34:30,459 --> 00:34:32,722 Countess took you on a mission? 499 00:34:32,722 --> 00:34:35,203 Yes. Well, I didn't really do anything, but... 500 00:34:35,203 --> 00:34:38,293 Is that what you do here? Make people fall in love? 501 00:34:38,293 --> 00:34:41,905 Yeah, fall in love, divorce, discover gravity, move cities, 502 00:34:41,905 --> 00:34:44,299 invent combustion engines, try a new cafe... 503 00:34:44,299 --> 00:34:46,388 Careful with those! 504 00:34:46,388 --> 00:34:50,436 We control their gut instincts, if only for a few seconds. 505 00:34:50,436 --> 00:34:51,741 But why? 506 00:34:51,741 --> 00:34:53,134 Yes, exactly! 507 00:34:53,134 --> 00:34:55,789 No credit. Not nearly enough money. 508 00:34:55,789 --> 00:34:57,573 Never any gratitude. 509 00:34:57,573 --> 00:35:00,924 Why waste our precious time helping ungrateful sods 510 00:35:00,924 --> 00:35:02,796 who are just going to die anyway? 511 00:35:26,863 --> 00:35:29,170 We're on the brink, Paul, 512 00:35:29,170 --> 00:35:30,824 on the edge of history. 513 00:35:32,217 --> 00:35:35,176 We were just about to launch Operation Fine Print, 514 00:35:35,176 --> 00:35:39,006 the most audacious influence campaign ever undertaken 515 00:35:39,006 --> 00:35:41,661 when we hit a bit of a snag. 516 00:35:42,879 --> 00:35:47,275 And now only you, Paul, can put us back on track. 517 00:35:47,275 --> 00:35:51,279 - Me? Yeah, well... 518 00:35:51,279 --> 00:35:53,063 Yeah, but you have a unique talent. 519 00:35:53,063 --> 00:35:55,327 You're more than just a Diviner. 520 00:35:56,545 --> 00:35:58,330 I'm a... Diviner? 521 00:35:58,330 --> 00:36:01,202 Your parents must be so proud of you. 522 00:36:01,202 --> 00:36:03,161 His parents? 523 00:36:03,161 --> 00:36:05,163 They're barely even aware he's alive. 524 00:36:07,339 --> 00:36:10,342 When he was six, his father lost him at a funfair. 525 00:36:10,342 --> 00:36:13,301 Took him 22 minutes to realize. 526 00:36:13,301 --> 00:36:14,737 Their house was hardly ever clean 527 00:36:14,737 --> 00:36:16,739 because his mother spent most of her time 528 00:36:16,739 --> 00:36:18,219 having three affairs. 529 00:36:18,219 --> 00:36:20,178 Dad had no idea. 530 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:21,396 Who was the third affair? 531 00:36:21,396 --> 00:36:23,311 Well, we don't get to choose our parents. 532 00:36:23,311 --> 00:36:26,009 Dennis's father looked like a squashed toad. 533 00:36:26,009 --> 00:36:29,056 My father was a controlling egomaniac. 534 00:36:30,275 --> 00:36:32,407 You know, he presented as a warm and gentle leader, 535 00:36:32,407 --> 00:36:34,192 but behind the scenes, he was evil. 536 00:36:35,628 --> 00:36:37,543 When I was 12, 537 00:36:37,543 --> 00:36:40,241 he sat me down, put a pen in my hand 538 00:36:40,241 --> 00:36:42,330 and made me write a contract. 539 00:36:42,330 --> 00:36:47,248 "I, Humphrey Wells, promise very hard 540 00:36:47,248 --> 00:36:50,077 "never to betray my father. 541 00:36:50,077 --> 00:36:54,429 "And if I do, my soul will be his." 542 00:36:54,429 --> 00:36:57,389 He kept that contract, never let it out of his sight. 543 00:36:57,389 --> 00:37:00,392 It imprisoned me, kept me silent, 544 00:37:00,392 --> 00:37:03,873 forced me to be the obedient, dutiful son. 545 00:37:03,873 --> 00:37:07,703 It was his insurance policy against me. 546 00:37:07,703 --> 00:37:11,185 What kind of father needs an insurance against his own son?! 547 00:37:17,147 --> 00:37:19,149 We're very similar, you and I. 548 00:37:20,325 --> 00:37:21,630 - You think? - Mmm. 549 00:37:23,284 --> 00:37:26,069 Undervalued. Underestimated. 550 00:37:27,375 --> 00:37:29,247 I suppose, maybe, in that way. 551 00:37:33,425 --> 00:37:35,731 Can I trust you, 552 00:37:35,731 --> 00:37:39,126 Paul Carpenter of 57 Wrigglesworth Street, Nunhead? 553 00:37:40,127 --> 00:37:41,171 Um... 554 00:37:41,171 --> 00:37:43,086 I mean, I'm number 59, 555 00:37:43,086 --> 00:37:45,524 but, yes, I think you can trust me, yes. 556 00:37:49,136 --> 00:37:50,485 I've lost something. 557 00:37:52,444 --> 00:37:54,315 Something not only dear to me, 558 00:37:54,315 --> 00:37:57,405 but immeasurably valuable. 559 00:37:57,405 --> 00:37:59,320 Oh. That's no good. 560 00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:01,104 Where did you last see it? 561 00:38:01,104 --> 00:38:03,106 Well, that's irrelevant. 562 00:38:03,106 --> 00:38:04,760 It's not a watch or a wallet. 563 00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:06,980 It's one of the most powerful and coveted items 564 00:38:06,980 --> 00:38:08,286 ever to exist. 565 00:38:08,286 --> 00:38:10,636 Oh. Right. Gosh. 566 00:38:12,072 --> 00:38:14,335 The trouble is, it has the ability to disguise itself. 567 00:38:14,335 --> 00:38:15,902 Like an octopus. 568 00:38:17,033 --> 00:38:18,731 It is not like an octopus. 569 00:38:23,692 --> 00:38:25,520 Do you think we have the right man here? 570 00:38:29,394 --> 00:38:31,526 I need you to find it, Paul. 571 00:38:31,526 --> 00:38:33,702 It's somewhere in this building, I know that, 572 00:38:33,702 --> 00:38:35,661 but it will refuse to be found 573 00:38:35,661 --> 00:38:38,707 so you will have to pretend that you're not looking for it. 574 00:38:38,707 --> 00:38:41,144 Pretend I'm not looking for it. 575 00:38:41,144 --> 00:38:43,756 Yeah, I put all my trust in you. 576 00:38:45,584 --> 00:38:46,846 Because the thing... 577 00:38:48,500 --> 00:38:50,806 the thing that I want you to find... 578 00:38:50,806 --> 00:38:51,677 that thing... 579 00:38:51,677 --> 00:38:53,374 It's a door. 580 00:38:54,419 --> 00:38:56,334 Yes, thank you, Dennis. 581 00:38:58,423 --> 00:39:00,816 It's a door. A portable door, to be specific. 582 00:39:00,816 --> 00:39:02,470 - Portable... - You're not to share this 583 00:39:02,470 --> 00:39:03,471 with anyone, 584 00:39:03,471 --> 00:39:05,386 even your blossoming romance. 585 00:39:05,386 --> 00:39:07,257 - Oh, we're definitely not... - But you must find it. 586 00:39:07,257 --> 00:39:09,390 It's crucial for Operation Fine Print 587 00:39:09,390 --> 00:39:11,740 and the new dawn of the company. 588 00:39:11,740 --> 00:39:14,569 Would you say everything hinges on his success? 589 00:39:14,569 --> 00:39:16,528 Yes, I would say everything hinges on... 590 00:39:16,528 --> 00:39:18,921 his success. 591 00:39:18,921 --> 00:39:19,966 Hm? 592 00:39:23,448 --> 00:39:25,537 Find my door. 593 00:39:25,537 --> 00:39:27,582 - OK. - Good man. 594 00:39:27,582 --> 00:39:29,236 How? 595 00:39:30,803 --> 00:39:32,674 You have the gift. 596 00:39:32,674 --> 00:39:35,068 Fate has brought us together. 597 00:39:35,068 --> 00:39:37,418 This is your time to shine! 598 00:39:40,465 --> 00:39:42,467 So... go shine. 599 00:39:45,470 --> 00:39:47,428 And, Paul? 600 00:40:01,877 --> 00:40:04,227 Just find the door. 601 00:40:04,227 --> 00:40:05,490 Easy. 602 00:40:08,275 --> 00:40:09,798 Here, door! 603 00:40:09,798 --> 00:40:11,452 Come on, door! 604 00:40:22,507 --> 00:40:23,769 Are you looking for something? 605 00:40:23,769 --> 00:40:25,118 No. 606 00:40:26,380 --> 00:40:28,382 You look like you're looking for something. 607 00:40:29,601 --> 00:40:32,081 Don't think so. No. 608 00:40:32,081 --> 00:40:34,083 Not very sure of yourself, are you? 609 00:40:34,083 --> 00:40:35,955 Do you remember who I am? 610 00:40:37,870 --> 00:40:38,784 Blank. 611 00:40:40,133 --> 00:40:41,830 I'm Nienke Van Spee, 612 00:40:41,830 --> 00:40:44,354 ASTP, KMCC. 613 00:40:44,354 --> 00:40:46,618 - Paul. - ASTP stands for 614 00:40:46,618 --> 00:40:49,795 "Associate of the Society of Thaumaturgical Practitioners." 615 00:40:49,795 --> 00:40:51,449 - Right. - Say that with a lisp. 616 00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:56,671 And KMCC 617 00:40:56,671 --> 00:40:58,760 stands for "Keeper of the Magician's Code of Conduct," 618 00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:00,022 which means you come to me 619 00:41:00,022 --> 00:41:02,155 if you hear of any illegal use of magic. 620 00:41:02,155 --> 00:41:04,200 Have you? Heard of any? 621 00:41:06,333 --> 00:41:08,596 How are you enjoying the new job? 622 00:41:08,596 --> 00:41:10,946 Oh, Sophie's a delight. 623 00:41:10,946 --> 00:41:13,122 If you were to buy her a present, I would 624 00:41:13,122 --> 00:41:16,125 suggest a small woolen scarf or a good-quality torch, 625 00:41:16,125 --> 00:41:18,171 and under no circumstances 626 00:41:18,171 --> 00:41:20,652 should you kiss her after eating licorice. 627 00:41:20,652 --> 00:41:22,480 - Oh, we're not... - She hates the stuff. 628 00:41:25,352 --> 00:41:27,963 How are you finding Mr. Wells? 629 00:41:27,963 --> 00:41:31,663 He's a wonderful boss. Honest. 630 00:41:31,663 --> 00:41:33,447 Eyes down here, pumpkin. 631 00:41:34,753 --> 00:41:37,712 What you see is what you get with Mr. Wells. 632 00:41:37,712 --> 00:41:40,628 No, there's... there's not a thing I worry about 633 00:41:40,628 --> 00:41:42,500 with Humphrey at the helm. 634 00:41:44,110 --> 00:41:45,546 What are you looking at, potato face? 635 00:41:45,546 --> 00:41:46,808 Sorry. 636 00:41:46,808 --> 00:41:47,940 Are you working with him closely? 637 00:41:49,202 --> 00:41:50,725 Not really. No. 638 00:41:52,597 --> 00:41:55,382 Well, I hope you get that chance. 639 00:41:55,382 --> 00:41:58,167 He seems to really like you, 640 00:41:58,167 --> 00:41:59,908 which is bewildering to us all. 641 00:42:03,042 --> 00:42:04,826 Bit of a turnip, aren't you? 642 00:42:04,826 --> 00:42:06,175 You certainly didn't get my vote. 643 00:42:06,175 --> 00:42:08,003 Anyhoo, must toot. 644 00:42:08,003 --> 00:42:10,179 Maybe you'll prove me wrong! 645 00:42:11,572 --> 00:42:14,532 It's five o'clock! Go home, Paul! 646 00:43:19,814 --> 00:43:21,250 Don't panic. It's just a dream. 647 00:43:21,250 --> 00:43:22,817 - What? Who are you? - I'm Casimir Suslowicz. 648 00:43:22,817 --> 00:43:23,644 What are you doing in my bedroom? 649 00:43:23,644 --> 00:43:24,732 This is not your bedroom. 650 00:43:24,732 --> 00:43:27,430 This is a dream of your bedroom 651 00:43:27,430 --> 00:43:28,649 - Why? How? - that I am in. 652 00:43:28,649 --> 00:43:30,085 It's what I do. 653 00:43:30,085 --> 00:43:33,741 I find it's the best way to get to the truth. 654 00:43:33,741 --> 00:43:34,873 - Truth? - Because we've all 655 00:43:34,873 --> 00:43:38,485 been wondering why Mr. Wells hired you. 656 00:43:40,487 --> 00:43:42,054 I can find bauxite on a map. 657 00:43:46,798 --> 00:43:49,452 - Are you...? - Waiting for the truth? Yes. 658 00:43:49,452 --> 00:43:52,542 This company got out of bauxite 107 years ago. 659 00:43:53,805 --> 00:43:56,982 Why did he hire you? 660 00:43:56,982 --> 00:43:59,288 I don't know what to tell you. Honestly. 661 00:43:59,288 --> 00:44:01,769 I...I think he just saw some real potential in me 662 00:44:01,769 --> 00:44:03,684 - and he... he... 663 00:44:03,684 --> 00:44:05,860 W... 664 00:44:05,860 --> 00:44:07,949 - What's wrong, Paul? 665 00:44:07,949 --> 00:44:09,690 - Foot hurting? 666 00:44:09,690 --> 00:44:12,562 Why were you hired, Paul? 667 00:44:17,089 --> 00:44:19,221 Not sure you can hear me. 668 00:44:19,221 --> 00:44:21,659 Can you hear me now? 669 00:44:21,659 --> 00:44:23,704 Why did he hire you? 670 00:44:25,140 --> 00:44:26,489 I can't say! 671 00:44:26,489 --> 00:44:27,839 I can do worse, Paul. 672 00:44:27,839 --> 00:44:30,232 I can do a lot worse now that I'm in here. 673 00:44:30,232 --> 00:44:31,712 But it's just a dream, right? 674 00:44:31,712 --> 00:44:33,496 Oh, yes, it's just a dream! 675 00:44:33,496 --> 00:44:35,716 But things have real world consequences, Paul. 676 00:44:35,716 --> 00:44:38,240 I could make you strip off, 677 00:44:38,240 --> 00:44:40,721 go for a little sleepwalk outside. 678 00:44:40,721 --> 00:44:41,809 - You wouldn't! - I could make a little bit 679 00:44:41,809 --> 00:44:43,332 of wee come out. 680 00:44:43,332 --> 00:44:45,160 Quite a bit, actually. 681 00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:46,727 OK! All right! 682 00:44:46,727 --> 00:44:48,598 He wants me to find the portable door! 683 00:44:51,906 --> 00:44:53,734 So... 684 00:44:53,734 --> 00:44:57,520 Humphrey has lost his portable door. 685 00:44:57,520 --> 00:44:59,740 I don't know what it does. 686 00:44:59,740 --> 00:45:01,307 I mean, why does he want it so badly? 687 00:45:02,961 --> 00:45:04,702 You know the saying 688 00:45:04,702 --> 00:45:07,705 "There is only one way to the Bank of the Dead"? 689 00:45:07,705 --> 00:45:09,924 No, actually. W-what's the one way to the Bank of the Dead? 690 00:45:09,924 --> 00:45:11,578 Dying. 691 00:45:12,666 --> 00:45:14,712 Well, it turns out that's not entirely true. 692 00:45:16,322 --> 00:45:17,845 There is another way. 693 00:45:20,935 --> 00:45:22,415 Bank of the what? 694 00:45:23,721 --> 00:45:24,765 You're still dreaming. 695 00:45:24,765 --> 00:45:25,940 Ahh! 696 00:45:45,786 --> 00:45:46,918 I could just eat you up. 697 00:45:49,572 --> 00:45:50,443 Oh... 698 00:45:57,015 --> 00:45:59,191 I love office supplies. 699 00:46:05,284 --> 00:46:06,764 I always wanted to be a Coincidator. 700 00:46:08,853 --> 00:46:10,463 Is that what I am? 701 00:46:10,463 --> 00:46:11,638 "Is that what I am?" 702 00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:15,816 - She's here. 703 00:46:15,816 --> 00:46:17,818 Right. 704 00:46:17,818 --> 00:46:19,733 Just pretend you're not looking for it. 705 00:48:06,144 --> 00:48:07,101 "Goblins only." 706 00:48:31,821 --> 00:48:34,433 Did I give you permission to be down here? 707 00:48:37,958 --> 00:48:41,614 Let me think. Did I give you permission to be down here? 708 00:48:41,614 --> 00:48:43,224 No, I did not! 709 00:48:43,224 --> 00:48:45,400 Sorry, Mr. Tanner. I... 710 00:48:45,400 --> 00:48:47,098 I thought it might be a good place to look for the... 711 00:48:47,098 --> 00:48:48,273 you know. 712 00:48:48,273 --> 00:48:50,101 The what? 713 00:48:50,101 --> 00:48:51,972 Portable door. 714 00:48:51,972 --> 00:48:54,148 The "portable door." 715 00:48:54,148 --> 00:48:57,282 Rather a big project for an intern. 716 00:48:57,282 --> 00:48:58,936 How's it going, by the way? 717 00:48:58,936 --> 00:49:01,460 Um... I think I'll be OK. 718 00:49:02,852 --> 00:49:04,985 If I were you, Carpenter, 719 00:49:04,985 --> 00:49:06,813 I would just give up now 720 00:49:06,813 --> 00:49:08,293 because when you fail-- 721 00:49:08,293 --> 00:49:10,773 and undoubtedly you will-- 722 00:49:10,773 --> 00:49:13,167 there are no words to describe 723 00:49:13,167 --> 00:49:15,604 what Mr. Wells will do to you. 724 00:49:15,604 --> 00:49:17,084 Oh, here's one: 725 00:49:17,084 --> 00:49:18,999 Gut. 726 00:49:18,999 --> 00:49:21,654 Impale. 727 00:49:21,654 --> 00:49:23,612 Marinate. Oh, they're coming now. 728 00:49:23,612 --> 00:49:25,092 Yes. Fry, poach... 729 00:49:25,092 --> 00:49:27,312 - OK. Thanks. - Peel, roast... 730 00:49:27,312 --> 00:49:29,923 - I think I get the... - Disembowel! 731 00:49:44,111 --> 00:49:45,678 Get...! 732 00:49:51,075 --> 00:49:53,033 I know this is probably a stupid question, 733 00:49:53,033 --> 00:49:55,035 but who's down there? 734 00:49:55,035 --> 00:49:56,558 Goblins. 735 00:49:56,558 --> 00:49:58,647 We've worked with them for centuries. 736 00:49:58,647 --> 00:50:00,693 They follow humans. They watch you at night. 737 00:50:00,693 --> 00:50:03,043 Steal from you. Sabotage your day. 738 00:50:03,043 --> 00:50:06,220 They're basically obsessed, and we use that obsession 739 00:50:06,220 --> 00:50:08,005 to arrange coincidences. 740 00:50:11,095 --> 00:50:12,705 Ask the dry cleaner 741 00:50:12,705 --> 00:50:14,011 if you can stick this poster on their wall. 742 00:50:15,229 --> 00:50:17,188 Her long-lost cousin will come by in a few days. 743 00:50:21,366 --> 00:50:23,237 Excuse me. Hi. 744 00:50:23,237 --> 00:50:25,413 Would I be able to put this poster up? 745 00:50:25,413 --> 00:50:27,372 - My friend lost her dog. - Course, love. 746 00:50:27,372 --> 00:50:30,244 Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. 747 00:50:30,244 --> 00:50:32,420 All right, you have a lovely day, yeah? 748 00:50:32,420 --> 00:50:34,031 You too, bye. 749 00:50:59,317 --> 00:51:00,448 I'm sure you've noticed. 750 00:51:00,448 --> 00:51:02,102 This company is at war with itself. 751 00:51:03,756 --> 00:51:06,280 Ever since John Wells mysteriously-- 752 00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:09,109 suspiciously--disappeared, 753 00:51:09,109 --> 00:51:11,720 things have changed. 754 00:51:11,720 --> 00:51:14,332 It was the same day Dennis's father, Arthur, disappeared. 755 00:51:16,290 --> 00:51:18,771 Those two sons are up to something, 756 00:51:18,771 --> 00:51:20,773 and it's not just renovations. 757 00:51:22,949 --> 00:51:26,561 We're not sure what or when. 758 00:51:26,561 --> 00:51:29,912 We're not even sure why he hired your scruffy friend, 759 00:51:29,912 --> 00:51:32,089 but it's connected somehow. 760 00:51:34,352 --> 00:51:36,441 I don't think he knows why he's been hired. 761 00:51:36,441 --> 00:51:39,792 I mean... he's quite nice, but... 762 00:51:41,272 --> 00:51:43,012 I can't really tell. I mean... 763 00:51:46,190 --> 00:51:47,974 You're a jumble of a human, aren't you? 764 00:51:50,368 --> 00:51:53,110 You're very good at reading people. 765 00:51:53,110 --> 00:51:54,633 You could be a great Seer. 766 00:51:55,677 --> 00:51:58,289 But you don't seem to make sense inside. 767 00:52:00,987 --> 00:52:04,295 It's like you have two instincts fighting each other. 768 00:52:04,295 --> 00:52:06,340 Is there something I should know? 769 00:52:08,299 --> 00:52:09,952 I am... 770 00:52:09,952 --> 00:52:11,128 I don't think... 771 00:52:13,391 --> 00:52:14,827 I guess I'm just... 772 00:52:16,350 --> 00:52:18,787 as you say... 773 00:52:18,787 --> 00:52:20,354 a jumble. 774 00:52:25,838 --> 00:52:27,361 I don't know what's happening to me. 775 00:52:27,361 --> 00:52:30,190 I'm listening to jazz, drinking coffee, which I hate. 776 00:52:30,190 --> 00:52:32,323 I'm suddenly loving balloons. 777 00:52:32,323 --> 00:52:34,194 I mean, I just don't know who I am anymore. 778 00:52:34,194 --> 00:52:35,152 Well, that's fascinating. 779 00:52:35,152 --> 00:52:36,370 Am I supposed to care? 780 00:52:36,370 --> 00:52:37,850 I want to change my mind. 781 00:52:37,850 --> 00:52:40,157 Well, too bad because you signed the contract! 782 00:52:42,246 --> 00:52:43,377 Everything OK? 783 00:52:43,377 --> 00:52:44,378 What? 784 00:52:46,206 --> 00:52:47,642 It's 4:53. 785 00:52:47,642 --> 00:52:49,209 Seven minutes to leave the building! 786 00:52:52,256 --> 00:52:53,431 I'm fine. 787 00:52:56,042 --> 00:52:57,348 Coming? 788 00:52:57,348 --> 00:52:58,218 Yep. 789 00:53:01,221 --> 00:53:03,223 Sounded like a heated chat. 790 00:53:03,223 --> 00:53:04,659 - With Tanner? - Ugh, it was just 791 00:53:04,659 --> 00:53:07,358 a disagreement about my employment contract. 792 00:53:07,358 --> 00:53:10,361 - You're not leaving, are you? - Starting to think I should. 793 00:53:10,361 --> 00:53:12,363 That'd be awful. And sad. 794 00:53:12,363 --> 00:53:13,842 Why? 795 00:53:13,842 --> 00:53:16,018 'Cause who would protect you from...? 796 00:53:16,018 --> 00:53:17,759 Exactly. 797 00:53:17,759 --> 00:53:19,892 Just be glad you're not a stapler. 798 00:53:24,723 --> 00:53:27,856 I suddenly... really... 799 00:53:27,856 --> 00:53:30,381 in my heart... 800 00:53:32,296 --> 00:53:33,906 need... 801 00:53:36,474 --> 00:53:38,215 ...licorice. 802 00:53:38,215 --> 00:53:40,217 You hate licorice, don't you? 803 00:53:40,217 --> 00:53:42,393 Yes, I did. But now I love it. 804 00:53:46,266 --> 00:53:47,572 Mmm! 805 00:53:47,572 --> 00:53:50,401 Mmm, it's so, um... licorice-y. 806 00:54:05,894 --> 00:54:07,983 - Do you want to get a drink? - Yes, please. 807 00:54:16,427 --> 00:54:19,386 I don't know why I ate that. How can anyone eat that? 808 00:54:19,386 --> 00:54:21,475 I actually don't mind licorice. 809 00:54:21,475 --> 00:54:23,085 Yes, but you dress like a 12-year-old accountant. 810 00:54:23,085 --> 00:54:24,522 Brilliant. 811 00:54:25,697 --> 00:54:26,654 Sorry. 812 00:54:29,353 --> 00:54:32,443 Listen... is everything OK? 813 00:54:32,443 --> 00:54:33,357 Yep. 814 00:54:34,967 --> 00:54:36,577 Fine. 815 00:54:36,577 --> 00:54:38,884 I guess I just thought... 816 00:54:40,451 --> 00:54:41,756 You'd be CEO by now. 817 00:54:41,756 --> 00:54:43,323 Ha. Yes. 818 00:54:45,369 --> 00:54:48,502 I don't know, I'm grateful for the fast track 819 00:54:48,502 --> 00:54:50,330 and the Countess, but... 820 00:54:50,330 --> 00:54:52,767 what if the downside isn't worth it? 821 00:54:52,767 --> 00:54:55,117 Well, what's the downside? 822 00:54:55,117 --> 00:54:56,945 Being miserable all the time? 823 00:54:56,945 --> 00:54:59,165 I'm not miserable. I'm ambitious. 824 00:55:00,558 --> 00:55:01,863 You wouldn't get it, Paul. You know, you're happy 825 00:55:01,863 --> 00:55:03,343 looking at maps all day and you don't need more. 826 00:55:03,343 --> 00:55:05,171 I just, I wish I was... 827 00:55:09,393 --> 00:55:11,743 Oh... my...God. 828 00:55:13,397 --> 00:55:14,876 You are doing more. 829 00:55:14,876 --> 00:55:17,009 - What? - What you doing? 830 00:55:17,009 --> 00:55:19,359 What? Nothing. I can't say. It's... nothing. 831 00:55:22,188 --> 00:55:24,843 Mr. Wells has me on a special task, but I can't say. 832 00:55:26,497 --> 00:55:28,803 It seems pretty important to him, though. 833 00:55:28,803 --> 00:55:30,370 'Cause I'm the only one who... 834 00:55:30,370 --> 00:55:32,851 - You're the only one who what? - I can't say. 835 00:55:36,028 --> 00:55:37,508 OK. 836 00:55:37,508 --> 00:55:40,162 Well, just so you know, be careful. 837 00:55:40,162 --> 00:55:41,468 Of what? 838 00:55:41,468 --> 00:55:44,558 Of him, Humphrey. He's not normal. 839 00:55:44,558 --> 00:55:48,170 Oh, and Countess is just your average office manager. 840 00:55:48,170 --> 00:55:49,955 He's not gonna want something for nothing, Paul. 841 00:55:51,609 --> 00:55:53,611 Seriously, what's with all the hating on Humphrey Wells? 842 00:55:54,916 --> 00:55:56,396 He doesn't push innocent people into fountains. 843 00:55:56,396 --> 00:55:58,180 You're so naive. I mean, firstly, we know 844 00:55:58,180 --> 00:55:59,704 there's more to this New Dawn than renovations. 845 00:55:59,704 --> 00:56:01,183 - Sorry, who's "we"? - Plus, Countess thinks 846 00:56:01,183 --> 00:56:02,184 Humphrey disappeared his own father. 847 00:56:03,751 --> 00:56:06,406 - Well, where's John Wells? - I dunno. Retired. 848 00:56:06,406 --> 00:56:07,451 Huh. 849 00:56:09,583 --> 00:56:11,846 Just... 850 00:56:11,846 --> 00:56:13,718 consider yourself warned. 851 00:56:16,721 --> 00:56:19,201 Maybe you're jealous. 852 00:56:19,201 --> 00:56:20,551 Maybe you can't handle the fact 853 00:56:20,551 --> 00:56:22,248 that the CEO loves me and not you. 854 00:56:22,248 --> 00:56:23,728 Have you always been this arrogant? 855 00:56:23,728 --> 00:56:25,556 Maybe I'm on a super-fast track. 856 00:56:25,556 --> 00:56:27,079 - A super-fast track? - And you're on 857 00:56:27,079 --> 00:56:28,602 - a regular fast track. 858 00:56:28,602 --> 00:56:30,561 - The truth is hard to hear. - Believe me, you are not. 859 00:56:30,561 --> 00:56:32,258 You fell into this job. 860 00:56:32,258 --> 00:56:34,260 You weren't plucked from obscurity and mentored 861 00:56:34,260 --> 00:56:36,088 by the CEO because they can't find any other 862 00:56:36,088 --> 00:56:38,395 middling-intelligent, averagely educated, 863 00:56:38,395 --> 00:56:40,440 slightly good-looking English boys in the city of London. 864 00:56:40,440 --> 00:56:42,877 If the CEO is asking you to find something, 865 00:56:42,877 --> 00:56:45,140 it's because they don't know what else to do with you. 866 00:57:01,461 --> 00:57:03,289 OK. 867 00:57:03,289 --> 00:57:04,464 Well, this was fun. 868 00:57:04,464 --> 00:57:06,161 - Let's do it again. - Yep. 869 00:57:24,005 --> 00:57:25,485 Here he is. 870 00:57:25,485 --> 00:57:27,618 The date from hell? 871 00:57:27,618 --> 00:57:29,271 What? 872 00:57:29,271 --> 00:57:31,491 "Let's go for a drink and yell at each other." 873 00:57:31,491 --> 00:57:34,320 - Whoa, hang on... - Not cool, Romeo! 874 00:57:34,320 --> 00:57:36,061 Not cool. 875 00:57:39,717 --> 00:57:42,328 Paul! Casimir Suslowicz. 876 00:57:43,851 --> 00:57:45,331 We met at your interview. 877 00:57:48,639 --> 00:57:50,162 Well, hope you're adjusting. 878 00:57:51,555 --> 00:57:52,991 Must dash. 879 00:57:55,733 --> 00:57:58,518 Right. Today's the day, Paul. 880 00:57:58,518 --> 00:57:59,563 Today is what day? 881 00:58:03,392 --> 00:58:05,960 - I know you. - I look like a lot of people. 882 00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:08,528 Monty. We met before my interview. 883 00:58:08,528 --> 00:58:11,139 Who knows? Anyway, turn around and go back up. 884 00:58:11,139 --> 00:58:11,966 I was just gonna have a look down... 885 00:58:11,966 --> 00:58:13,707 Well, you can't. 886 00:58:13,707 --> 00:58:16,057 - Why not? - I don't have those details. 887 00:58:16,057 --> 00:58:18,146 All I've been told is "Don't let anyone in the basement." 888 00:58:18,146 --> 00:58:19,887 But there's just an old closet down there. 889 00:58:19,887 --> 00:58:22,542 - That's what I said: closet. - You said basement. 890 00:58:22,542 --> 00:58:24,805 - No, no, I said closet. - You definitely said basement. 891 00:58:28,374 --> 00:58:30,332 Please don't tell Mr. Tanner I said that. 892 00:58:30,332 --> 00:58:31,725 Why not? 893 00:58:31,725 --> 00:58:33,031 He's very creative with his punishment. 894 00:58:34,380 --> 00:58:36,556 You didn't teach me History of Music 895 00:58:36,556 --> 00:58:39,167 or coach football, did you? 896 00:58:39,167 --> 00:58:40,647 No. 897 00:58:41,953 --> 00:58:43,563 You were trying to make me miss my interview. 898 00:58:43,563 --> 00:58:45,739 Yes. As instructed. 899 00:58:49,613 --> 00:58:52,006 I won't tell Mr. Tanner you said "basement." 900 00:58:52,006 --> 00:58:54,531 Oh, that's very decent of you. 901 00:58:54,531 --> 00:58:55,706 If you let me go down there. 902 01:02:07,898 --> 01:02:09,595 - Agh! 903 01:03:43,515 --> 01:03:44,646 Found you. 904 01:04:29,039 --> 01:04:30,083 Ladies and gentlemen, 905 01:04:30,083 --> 01:04:31,215 my friends, 906 01:04:31,215 --> 01:04:34,000 if I may get your attention. 907 01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:35,349 Thank you. 908 01:04:35,349 --> 01:04:39,049 What you're about to see-- 909 01:04:39,049 --> 01:04:41,921 and it's not exaggerating to say this-- 910 01:04:41,921 --> 01:04:45,925 is going to change the world forever. 911 01:04:47,057 --> 01:04:49,929 See, for centuries, 912 01:04:49,929 --> 01:04:54,064 we at JW Wells have been in the business 913 01:04:54,064 --> 01:04:59,025 of changing small lives in small ways. 914 01:04:59,025 --> 01:05:01,201 Absolutely lovely. 915 01:05:01,201 --> 01:05:02,768 Now, this has always struck me 916 01:05:02,768 --> 01:05:06,119 as an odd waste of our talents. 917 01:05:06,119 --> 01:05:10,210 So when my father disappeared, presumed dead, 918 01:05:10,210 --> 01:05:13,474 I decided this was our chance. 919 01:05:13,474 --> 01:05:15,259 Opportunity is right there in front of us, 920 01:05:15,259 --> 01:05:17,130 begging to be used. 921 01:05:19,045 --> 01:05:21,613 We've always provided a service 922 01:05:21,613 --> 01:05:23,093 for our customers. 923 01:05:23,093 --> 01:05:25,965 What if we make them serve us? 924 01:05:25,965 --> 01:05:30,274 What if we make them the product? 925 01:05:30,274 --> 01:05:33,407 Mr. Tanner, let's have the guinea pig. 926 01:05:33,407 --> 01:05:35,844 Gather round, please. 927 01:05:35,844 --> 01:05:37,629 I have something to show you. 928 01:05:40,675 --> 01:05:42,155 Sophie, just a few more quick questions. 929 01:05:42,155 --> 01:05:43,635 Any phobias? 930 01:05:43,635 --> 01:05:46,333 Balloons, weirdly. 931 01:05:46,333 --> 01:05:48,422 - Do you like coffee? - Not at all, sorry. 932 01:05:48,422 --> 01:05:50,163 Favorite music style? 933 01:05:50,163 --> 01:05:52,513 I like loads of music, just not jazz. 934 01:05:52,513 --> 01:05:53,819 What do you think of when I 935 01:05:53,819 --> 01:05:55,647 say the word "licorice"? 936 01:05:55,647 --> 01:05:58,171 I actually almost gag. 937 01:05:58,171 --> 01:05:59,303 This is my fast-track interview... 938 01:05:59,303 --> 01:06:00,478 OK, hold it right there. 939 01:06:02,828 --> 01:06:04,090 After that interview, 940 01:06:04,090 --> 01:06:08,051 we were able to influence this young consumer. 941 01:06:09,356 --> 01:06:10,270 I don't know what's happening to me. 942 01:06:10,270 --> 01:06:11,880 I'm listening to jazz, 943 01:06:11,880 --> 01:06:13,143 drinking coffee, which I hate. 944 01:06:13,143 --> 01:06:15,188 I'm suddenly loving balloons. 945 01:06:15,188 --> 01:06:17,016 I mean, I just don't know who I am anymore. 946 01:06:21,890 --> 01:06:23,805 Thank you, Dennis. 947 01:06:23,805 --> 01:06:25,372 Wait... 948 01:06:25,372 --> 01:06:29,159 If we can do this to a well-educated... 949 01:06:29,159 --> 01:06:31,335 young, 950 01:06:31,335 --> 01:06:33,467 strong-willed individual, 951 01:06:33,467 --> 01:06:36,427 imagine what we can do to the masses. 952 01:06:38,603 --> 01:06:42,128 Your prices will skyrocket. 953 01:06:42,128 --> 01:06:47,220 Your consumer base will double, triple, quadruple! 954 01:06:47,220 --> 01:06:50,832 Your Roger will win his election in a landslide! 955 01:06:50,832 --> 01:06:52,138 How are you doing this? 956 01:06:52,138 --> 01:06:53,879 With a simple binding contract 957 01:06:53,879 --> 01:06:55,228 they don't even know they've signed. 958 01:06:55,228 --> 01:06:57,448 Door! - Just like our Sophie did. 959 01:06:58,449 --> 01:07:02,670 I will sell you the will of the people. 960 01:07:02,670 --> 01:07:04,672 Door! I will hand you 961 01:07:04,672 --> 01:07:06,239 their desires, 962 01:07:06,239 --> 01:07:09,068 their gut instincts on a silver platter. 963 01:07:09,068 --> 01:07:12,071 Because here at JW Wells, 964 01:07:12,071 --> 01:07:13,899 influence is... 965 01:07:13,899 --> 01:07:15,118 Whoop. 966 01:07:18,121 --> 01:07:19,426 Thank you, Dennis. 967 01:07:21,994 --> 01:07:26,433 Influence is no coincidence. 968 01:07:32,178 --> 01:07:33,701 "Knock, knock". 969 01:07:33,701 --> 01:07:34,789 OK. 970 01:07:37,140 --> 01:07:38,097 Knock, knock. 971 01:07:40,099 --> 01:07:42,710 Why don't we do it over some refreshments? 972 01:07:42,710 --> 01:07:44,756 Mr. Tanner? Dennis! 973 01:07:46,932 --> 01:07:48,107 Supermarket! 974 01:08:39,637 --> 01:08:40,812 Paul. 975 01:08:42,814 --> 01:08:46,513 - Are you being chased? Uh, no. Fine. 976 01:08:46,513 --> 01:08:48,950 You're puffing and you look spooked. 977 01:08:48,950 --> 01:08:52,954 Ah, no, just... just I'm keen to get to work. 978 01:08:52,954 --> 01:08:53,955 So, anyway, thanks for... 979 01:08:53,955 --> 01:08:55,043 Paul. 980 01:08:56,480 --> 01:08:59,178 If you do find it, 981 01:08:59,178 --> 01:09:00,310 this is who you come to. 982 01:09:02,399 --> 01:09:03,182 Right. 983 01:09:10,363 --> 01:09:12,191 Paul! 984 01:09:12,191 --> 01:09:14,193 We need to clear the air. 985 01:09:14,193 --> 01:09:17,631 I'm sorry about what I said last night. 986 01:09:17,631 --> 01:09:21,200 But I do think we are fundamentally different people 987 01:09:21,200 --> 01:09:22,984 and some people are just not meant to spend time together. 988 01:09:22,984 --> 01:09:24,551 Hey! What the hell? 989 01:09:27,598 --> 01:09:29,208 They're filming you. Us. 990 01:09:29,208 --> 01:09:30,514 - What? - You. 991 01:09:30,514 --> 01:09:32,342 They're controlling you, Sophie. 992 01:09:32,342 --> 01:09:33,995 What are you talking about? 993 01:09:33,995 --> 01:09:35,388 He said something about a contract. 994 01:09:36,433 --> 01:09:38,174 I saw... 995 01:09:40,393 --> 01:09:42,221 - I found it. - Found what? 996 01:09:46,617 --> 01:09:47,879 This. 997 01:09:51,056 --> 01:09:52,275 You found a towel? 998 01:09:53,711 --> 01:09:55,191 Just watch this. 999 01:09:57,628 --> 01:09:59,934 - Knock, knock. 1000 01:10:09,901 --> 01:10:11,381 That's a door. 1001 01:10:11,381 --> 01:10:13,774 Yep. 1002 01:10:13,774 --> 01:10:14,949 Ready? 1003 01:10:20,651 --> 01:10:21,565 Supermarket. 1004 01:10:25,308 --> 01:10:27,048 This is not... 1005 01:10:27,048 --> 01:10:28,615 Something's gone wrong. 1006 01:10:28,615 --> 01:10:30,530 Hello? - Who's that? 1007 01:10:30,530 --> 01:10:32,402 Wait there. I'm coming! 1008 01:10:32,402 --> 01:10:33,838 Please don't...! 1009 01:10:37,320 --> 01:10:39,278 Who was the voice? 1010 01:10:39,278 --> 01:10:41,889 "Announce your destination before opening." 1011 01:10:41,889 --> 01:10:43,674 OK. My bad. 1012 01:10:45,197 --> 01:10:47,199 - Knock, knock. 1013 01:10:48,940 --> 01:10:52,248 OK. S-s... um... 1014 01:10:52,248 --> 01:10:53,423 My flat. 1015 01:10:55,860 --> 01:10:58,428 See? Portable door. 1016 01:11:04,608 --> 01:11:06,087 This is your flat? 1017 01:11:06,087 --> 01:11:07,001 Yeah. 1018 01:11:08,220 --> 01:11:09,352 You're actually quite neat. 1019 01:11:11,310 --> 01:11:12,268 What...? 1020 01:11:17,229 --> 01:11:18,883 So it goes wherever you want to go. 1021 01:11:20,624 --> 01:11:22,452 This has just become the best job in the world. 1022 01:11:24,802 --> 01:11:26,325 Before you do that, can we just...? 1023 01:11:26,325 --> 01:11:28,327 - Knock, knock. - I have to tell you what I saw. 1024 01:11:28,327 --> 01:11:30,503 - Amazing! - It was an interview with you. 1025 01:11:30,503 --> 01:11:31,635 There were all these people watching... 1026 01:11:31,635 --> 01:11:33,332 Come on! 1027 01:11:35,334 --> 01:11:37,510 Come up here! 1028 01:11:37,510 --> 01:11:38,903 Whoa! 1029 01:11:45,866 --> 01:11:47,999 We're on top of the world! 1030 01:11:51,524 --> 01:11:52,525 Close your eyes. 1031 01:11:52,525 --> 01:11:54,179 No--your ears. 1032 01:11:55,398 --> 01:11:58,226 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm ♪ 1033 01:11:58,226 --> 01:12:00,794 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1034 01:12:03,362 --> 01:12:05,364 - Fiji? - No! 1035 01:12:05,364 --> 01:12:07,366 - Jamaica? - Warmer. 1036 01:12:07,366 --> 01:12:11,152 ♪ Come on and talk to me 1037 01:12:11,152 --> 01:12:13,329 ♪ Lovey dovey, lovey one... 1038 01:12:13,329 --> 01:12:16,984 Whoo! 1039 01:12:16,984 --> 01:12:19,813 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh 1040 01:12:19,813 --> 01:12:22,512 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh ♪ 1041 01:12:22,512 --> 01:12:25,166 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh 1042 01:12:25,166 --> 01:12:26,516 ♪ Oh-oh-oh... 1043 01:12:26,516 --> 01:12:27,995 Really? 1044 01:12:27,995 --> 01:12:29,736 - ♪ Tell you a story... 1045 01:12:29,736 --> 01:12:32,522 ♪ Happened a long time ago 1046 01:12:32,522 --> 01:12:33,523 - ♪ Little bitty pretty one... 1047 01:12:33,523 --> 01:12:35,176 I'm busy this week. 1048 01:12:35,176 --> 01:12:36,569 You should be able to handle these clients, yes? 1049 01:12:38,441 --> 01:12:41,487 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh 1050 01:12:41,487 --> 01:12:44,011 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh ♪ 1051 01:12:44,011 --> 01:12:46,492 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh 1052 01:12:46,492 --> 01:12:48,494 ♪ Oh-oh-oh, whoa, oh, oh 1053 01:12:48,494 --> 01:12:50,931 ♪ Little bitty pretty one 1054 01:12:50,931 --> 01:12:53,499 ♪ Come on and talk to me 1055 01:12:53,499 --> 01:12:56,502 ♪ Lovey dovey, lovey one 1056 01:12:56,502 --> 01:12:58,417 ♪ Come sit down on my knee 1057 01:12:59,984 --> 01:13:02,552 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1058 01:13:02,552 --> 01:13:05,119 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm ♪ 1059 01:13:06,817 --> 01:13:09,428 Look at that. Amazing. 1060 01:13:09,428 --> 01:13:10,429 It's so cool. 1061 01:13:10,429 --> 01:13:12,431 It is so beautiful here. 1062 01:13:12,431 --> 01:13:15,260 So, what's your favorite place that we've been to? 1063 01:13:15,260 --> 01:13:18,219 My favorite place that we've been to... 1064 01:13:18,219 --> 01:13:20,047 That's a really hard question. I don't know. 1065 01:13:20,047 --> 01:13:22,267 Why do I always have to answer first? 1066 01:13:36,107 --> 01:13:38,239 Did I mention I was the South East Junior 1067 01:13:38,239 --> 01:13:39,719 Ballroom champion three years running? 1068 01:13:39,719 --> 01:13:41,547 You failed to actually. 1069 01:13:41,547 --> 01:13:42,766 Three years, I'm serious. 1070 01:13:42,766 --> 01:13:44,550 You hid it so well. 1071 01:13:44,550 --> 01:13:46,117 I didn't want to show off. 1072 01:13:46,117 --> 01:13:47,771 Don't be like that, you're actually really good. 1073 01:14:16,582 --> 01:14:19,280 I don't believe it! 1074 01:14:44,218 --> 01:14:45,350 Ooh! 1075 01:15:10,854 --> 01:15:12,508 What if I told you I can read minds now, too? 1076 01:15:14,031 --> 01:15:15,728 Really? 1077 01:15:15,728 --> 01:15:17,904 What am I thinking? 1078 01:15:17,904 --> 01:15:19,732 "Gosh, Paul is handsome and interesting." 1079 01:15:27,479 --> 01:15:29,133 Maybe we should stay here. 1080 01:15:31,135 --> 01:15:33,529 Eh? Just eat fresh seafood every day. 1081 01:15:34,617 --> 01:15:36,357 Yeah... 1082 01:15:36,357 --> 01:15:38,011 Except I hate fish. 1083 01:15:38,011 --> 01:15:40,536 But you don't know yourself, do you? Maybe you love it. 1084 01:15:46,803 --> 01:15:48,761 Or we could just take the portable door for lunch, 1085 01:15:48,761 --> 01:15:50,502 somewhere different every day. 1086 01:15:53,723 --> 01:15:54,898 We could build a little house. 1087 01:15:57,074 --> 01:15:58,423 Over there. 1088 01:16:05,822 --> 01:16:07,171 I like you. 1089 01:16:08,738 --> 01:16:10,261 I really do, quite a lot, 1090 01:16:10,261 --> 01:16:13,656 which is weird because you're such a... 1091 01:16:21,533 --> 01:16:24,754 But ever since I signed that stupid fast-track contract... 1092 01:16:26,277 --> 01:16:27,452 I feel like they're in control 1093 01:16:27,452 --> 01:16:28,584 of that whole part of me. 1094 01:16:30,542 --> 01:16:32,283 My instinct and... 1095 01:16:35,460 --> 01:16:36,853 my heart. 1096 01:16:40,813 --> 01:16:42,772 I don't trust my own feelings. 1097 01:16:46,689 --> 01:16:49,213 I guess I don't know if what I'm feeling for you is real. 1098 01:16:53,870 --> 01:16:55,349 Well, then we have to find this thing that you signed. 1099 01:16:57,134 --> 01:16:58,614 Why? 1100 01:16:58,614 --> 01:17:00,833 We could reverse it somehow. 1101 01:17:00,833 --> 01:17:03,531 So then you'd know who you really are. 1102 01:17:03,531 --> 01:17:08,014 And how you really feel about pies and jazz. 1103 01:17:08,014 --> 01:17:09,320 And especially... 1104 01:17:11,235 --> 01:17:12,671 licorice. 1105 01:17:12,671 --> 01:17:15,282 But how do we reverse it? 1106 01:17:15,282 --> 01:17:18,242 Well, I dunno. But we have to try. 1107 01:17:21,724 --> 01:17:24,030 - Knock, knock. 1108 01:17:27,817 --> 01:17:29,645 We should check Humphrey's office first. 1109 01:17:29,645 --> 01:17:30,646 After work. 1110 01:17:36,347 --> 01:17:37,870 Interns! 1111 01:17:37,870 --> 01:17:39,698 There's a rumor going around and I hope it's-- 1112 01:17:41,352 --> 01:17:43,006 Why are you dressed like that? 1113 01:17:43,006 --> 01:17:44,485 - We're not. - Theme party. 1114 01:17:44,485 --> 01:17:46,705 - Tonight. - Last night. Uh... beach theme. 1115 01:17:46,705 --> 01:17:48,533 It was a good party, actually. It was so much fun. 1116 01:17:56,062 --> 01:17:59,022 Do you have any idea what thin ice you are on? 1117 01:18:01,764 --> 01:18:05,115 I'm going to say this once, and then you're on your own. 1118 01:18:06,377 --> 01:18:09,815 Fold it up, put it outside Mr. Wells's door, 1119 01:18:09,815 --> 01:18:13,210 walk away and never, never come back. 1120 01:18:14,777 --> 01:18:16,213 And if you're lucky... 1121 01:18:17,736 --> 01:18:19,738 he'll be too busy to bother killing you. 1122 01:18:25,875 --> 01:18:27,920 He knows, but he didn't do anything. 1123 01:18:27,920 --> 01:18:29,835 He's right. Is he right? We should leave. 1124 01:18:29,835 --> 01:18:30,880 We have to find your contract. 1125 01:18:30,880 --> 01:18:33,056 - And what? Rip it up? - I dunno. 1126 01:18:33,056 --> 01:18:34,753 But we have to do something. 1127 01:18:34,753 --> 01:18:35,885 We'll come back tonight. 1128 01:18:35,885 --> 01:18:37,408 OK. 1129 01:18:47,766 --> 01:18:49,246 - Good evening. - Goodnight. 1130 01:19:37,468 --> 01:19:38,991 Didn't you say 'Humphrey's office'? 1131 01:19:38,991 --> 01:19:40,819 I did. 1132 01:19:40,819 --> 01:19:42,473 This is not Humphrey's office. 1133 01:19:43,866 --> 01:19:45,476 Those are a lot of printers. 1134 01:19:45,476 --> 01:19:48,131 Door wanted us to come here. 1135 01:19:48,131 --> 01:19:50,655 So, what, it has a personality now? 1136 01:19:52,396 --> 01:19:54,006 Oh, shit! What is it? 1137 01:19:55,225 --> 01:19:56,661 It's gone. 1138 01:19:57,749 --> 01:19:59,838 Just... be careful. 1139 01:20:05,975 --> 01:20:07,019 The last time I was here, 1140 01:20:07,019 --> 01:20:09,108 these printers were all printing, 1141 01:20:09,108 --> 01:20:10,327 but I don't know what. 1142 01:20:12,764 --> 01:20:15,027 They're terms and conditions. 1143 01:20:15,027 --> 01:20:17,856 Those things you click "agree" but never read. 1144 01:20:19,292 --> 01:20:22,121 "Operation Fine Print." 1145 01:20:22,121 --> 01:20:23,470 Humphrey's mentioned that. 1146 01:20:25,821 --> 01:20:28,040 Was that a bad scream or a good scream? 1147 01:20:28,040 --> 01:20:29,999 I'm hoping good? 1148 01:20:34,090 --> 01:20:35,700 I mean, they're all different. 1149 01:20:37,006 --> 01:20:38,921 This one's a gym membership. 1150 01:20:40,923 --> 01:20:42,663 This is a train ticket. 1151 01:20:42,663 --> 01:20:46,754 A rental agreement. But why is JW Wells collecting them? 1152 01:20:48,974 --> 01:20:51,020 Maybe this is what I signed. 1153 01:21:22,921 --> 01:21:23,966 We have to get to Humphrey's... 1154 01:21:23,966 --> 01:21:25,750 - What was that?! 1155 01:21:30,276 --> 01:21:31,495 I actually don't know. 1156 01:21:36,979 --> 01:21:38,545 Sophie! 1157 01:21:45,465 --> 01:21:47,032 I'm happy to not find out what that is 1158 01:21:47,032 --> 01:21:48,947 and just, you know, stick to the plan. 1159 01:21:50,731 --> 01:21:52,385 We should at least look. 1160 01:21:52,385 --> 01:21:53,604 Should we, though? 1161 01:21:54,648 --> 01:21:57,303 One, two... 1162 01:21:57,303 --> 01:21:58,087 three! 1163 01:22:49,181 --> 01:22:50,052 - Knock, knock. 1164 01:22:54,708 --> 01:22:55,971 Humphrey's office. 1165 01:23:05,589 --> 01:23:07,069 It's not listening to us. 1166 01:23:13,162 --> 01:23:14,902 "Ripae mortuorum." 1167 01:23:19,211 --> 01:23:20,604 "Bank of the Dead." 1168 01:23:22,693 --> 01:23:24,347 "One way." 1169 01:23:24,347 --> 01:23:26,044 That was in my dream. 1170 01:23:26,044 --> 01:23:28,220 He said something about that. 1171 01:23:28,220 --> 01:23:29,700 I think I saw that. 1172 01:23:29,700 --> 01:23:31,267 In the fine print. 1173 01:23:38,883 --> 01:23:41,407 Here. "Bank of the Dead." 1174 01:23:41,407 --> 01:23:42,843 "By clicking 'agree', I consent 1175 01:23:42,843 --> 01:23:45,150 "to signing my soul, my entire soul, 1176 01:23:45,150 --> 01:23:46,847 "and therefore all desires, instincts and needs, 1177 01:23:46,847 --> 01:23:48,675 "over to JW Wells and Company 1178 01:23:48,675 --> 01:23:51,330 "to be held in the Bank of the Dead for perpetuity, 1179 01:23:51,330 --> 01:23:54,203 "forever and a day in all territories and universes." 1180 01:23:54,203 --> 01:23:56,292 Operation Fine Print. 1181 01:23:57,510 --> 01:24:00,078 - Humphrey and Dennis. - They're stealing souls. 1182 01:24:00,078 --> 01:24:01,775 They stole my soul. 1183 01:24:04,735 --> 01:24:06,258 And now Humphrey's gonna control the instincts 1184 01:24:06,258 --> 01:24:08,695 of anyone who signs this or clicks "agree". 1185 01:24:08,695 --> 01:24:10,393 I mean, that could be millions of people. 1186 01:24:13,961 --> 01:24:15,485 Sophie? 1187 01:24:17,574 --> 01:24:19,706 Maybe we should... walk over here. 1188 01:24:19,706 --> 01:24:21,534 Yeah? 1189 01:24:21,534 --> 01:24:22,753 Just walk. 1190 01:24:23,971 --> 01:24:26,104 Don't make any sudden moves. 1191 01:24:28,193 --> 01:24:29,281 Nothing to panic about. 1192 01:24:30,500 --> 01:24:32,067 Just over here. 1193 01:24:33,590 --> 01:24:36,941 Slowly. Slowly. 1194 01:24:38,334 --> 01:24:39,596 Go. 1195 01:24:45,254 --> 01:24:47,299 This has to be the way out. 1196 01:24:49,562 --> 01:24:51,956 Paul? 1197 01:24:59,442 --> 01:25:01,139 Sophie, go! 1198 01:25:01,139 --> 01:25:02,358 Through here! 1199 01:25:02,358 --> 01:25:04,099 Go, go, go, go, go! 1200 01:25:08,799 --> 01:25:10,409 You OK? Yeah. 1201 01:25:10,409 --> 01:25:13,151 Yeah. Are you OK? 1202 01:25:13,151 --> 01:25:15,110 Yeah. 1203 01:25:20,637 --> 01:25:23,944 Did I give you permission to be down here? 1204 01:25:23,944 --> 01:25:27,252 Let me think. No, I did not. 1205 01:25:27,252 --> 01:25:29,776 Mr. Tanner, the whole place is crawling 1206 01:25:29,776 --> 01:25:31,691 with the most disgusting, hideous things. 1207 01:25:31,691 --> 01:25:34,259 Now, that is truly offensive. 1208 01:25:34,259 --> 01:25:36,827 These things are the reason... 1209 01:25:36,827 --> 01:25:40,265 you are forbidden to be down here after hours! 1210 01:25:40,265 --> 01:25:41,832 It's not as if you weren't warned! 1211 01:25:43,312 --> 01:25:44,965 You're a Goblin. 1212 01:25:44,965 --> 01:25:47,620 Ha! How kind of you to notice. 1213 01:25:49,056 --> 01:25:51,842 You humans are so stupid. 1214 01:25:51,842 --> 01:25:54,975 I've looked out for you your whole life, Carpenter. 1215 01:25:54,975 --> 01:25:56,412 If it wasn't for the Goblins, 1216 01:25:56,412 --> 01:25:58,370 you'd still be picking fleas off each other's back 1217 01:25:58,370 --> 01:26:01,156 and clubbing your food to death with a jawbone. 1218 01:26:03,854 --> 01:26:07,510 And yet you ignored my simple advice. 1219 01:26:07,510 --> 01:26:08,815 Now... 1220 01:26:08,815 --> 01:26:11,078 hand it over. 1221 01:26:11,078 --> 01:26:13,080 Dennis! Enough! 1222 01:26:14,517 --> 01:26:16,214 Mr. Wells! 1223 01:26:17,215 --> 01:26:19,652 I expected so much more from you, Paul. 1224 01:26:19,652 --> 01:26:23,090 It's after hours, Mr. Wells. I have it under control. 1225 01:26:23,090 --> 01:26:26,355 Oh, what would you have done? Drooled them into submission? 1226 01:26:26,355 --> 01:26:29,009 You greasy, thug-nosed parasite. 1227 01:26:29,009 --> 01:26:30,228 - Give me the bag. - Call off your toads. 1228 01:26:30,228 --> 01:26:31,751 How dare you! 1229 01:26:31,751 --> 01:26:33,536 - Call them off! - I'm not afraid of you. 1230 01:26:33,536 --> 01:26:36,016 This is my domain down here! 1231 01:26:37,844 --> 01:26:40,238 Careful, Dennis. 1232 01:26:40,238 --> 01:26:43,415 You ought to think very carefully. 1233 01:26:43,415 --> 01:26:45,243 A gutter-living Goblin 1234 01:26:45,243 --> 01:26:47,376 challenging a Great Wizard? 1235 01:26:47,376 --> 01:26:50,553 Now, Mr. Great Wizard, 1236 01:26:50,553 --> 01:26:53,208 you'd be nothing without us. 1237 01:26:53,208 --> 01:26:56,254 Who would line up your clients? Hm? 1238 01:26:56,254 --> 01:26:59,214 Who would do your grunt work? Eh? 1239 01:26:59,214 --> 01:27:00,389 And what would you do? 1240 01:27:00,389 --> 01:27:03,087 No jobs, nowhere to live. 1241 01:27:03,087 --> 01:27:05,698 No unlimited supply of delicious pigeons. 1242 01:27:08,962 --> 01:27:10,616 - Turn them back. 1243 01:27:11,922 --> 01:27:12,879 - Turn them back! - Knock, knock. 1244 01:27:12,879 --> 01:27:14,054 - The door. 1245 01:27:14,054 --> 01:27:15,099 - Say somewhere. - Say nothing! 1246 01:27:22,498 --> 01:27:24,761 Who closes the door, keeps the door. 1247 01:27:39,950 --> 01:27:42,126 I tried to say somewhere but Humphrey stopped me. 1248 01:28:01,667 --> 01:28:02,886 Who are you? 1249 01:28:06,368 --> 01:28:08,413 Do you have it? - We have to get out of here! 1250 01:28:08,413 --> 01:28:09,980 Stay where you are. 1251 01:28:11,895 --> 01:28:13,331 Whoa... Careful, Paul! 1252 01:28:13,331 --> 01:28:15,202 You can't get anywhere! 1253 01:28:15,202 --> 01:28:17,161 Unless you have it, you can't leave! 1254 01:28:17,161 --> 01:28:19,772 - What's going on, Paul? 1255 01:28:19,772 --> 01:28:21,600 - Who are you? - You don't have it, do you? 1256 01:28:21,600 --> 01:28:23,298 The portable door. 1257 01:28:23,298 --> 01:28:25,169 - We did, but... - Oh! 1258 01:28:28,172 --> 01:28:30,174 Wait! How do we get out of...? 1259 01:28:30,174 --> 01:28:31,480 Wait! We have to get out! 1260 01:28:31,480 --> 01:28:34,352 Who closes the door, keeps the door. 1261 01:28:34,352 --> 01:28:38,138 What does that mean, "who closes the door"? 1262 01:28:38,138 --> 01:28:40,880 Humphrey closed the door, so he keeps it? 1263 01:28:40,880 --> 01:28:42,447 We're surrounded by doors, 1264 01:28:42,447 --> 01:28:43,709 so one of these must be a way out. 1265 01:28:45,145 --> 01:28:46,364 Bless you. 1266 01:28:46,364 --> 01:28:48,366 You're in the Nether. 1267 01:28:48,366 --> 01:28:49,933 There are no doors out of the Nether. 1268 01:28:51,674 --> 01:28:53,545 You're John Wells. 1269 01:28:56,418 --> 01:28:58,507 You've got Humphrey's soul. 1270 01:28:58,507 --> 01:29:00,204 How did you know that? 1271 01:29:00,204 --> 01:29:01,640 You made him sign his soul over to you. 1272 01:29:01,640 --> 01:29:02,815 That's the contract. 1273 01:29:02,815 --> 01:29:05,731 Oh, you-- He was an evil child. Awful. 1274 01:29:05,731 --> 01:29:07,733 I needed insurance. 1275 01:29:07,733 --> 01:29:10,257 So you could control him, then? 1276 01:29:10,257 --> 01:29:11,911 - You can make him let us out. - What, you don't think 1277 01:29:11,911 --> 01:29:14,218 I would've thought of that years ago? 1278 01:29:14,218 --> 01:29:15,828 I have the contract, but it's pointless 1279 01:29:15,828 --> 01:29:17,221 if I can't get it to the Bank. 1280 01:29:19,441 --> 01:29:21,399 The Bank of the Dead... 1281 01:29:22,574 --> 01:29:23,880 Now, wait a minute. 1282 01:29:25,447 --> 01:29:28,014 You have a contract for Humphrey Wells' soul? 1283 01:29:28,014 --> 01:29:29,755 And if we get it to the Bank, he's yours? 1284 01:29:29,755 --> 01:29:31,409 Mm-hmm. 1285 01:29:31,409 --> 01:29:33,542 You have indeed found the root to the problem. 1286 01:29:34,891 --> 01:29:35,892 So we're here forever? 1287 01:29:37,633 --> 01:29:38,895 Yep. 1288 01:29:40,070 --> 01:29:41,376 I can find a way out. 1289 01:29:43,465 --> 01:29:45,031 It's what I do. 1290 01:29:45,031 --> 01:29:47,730 There are no doors out of the Nether. Only in. 1291 01:30:01,787 --> 01:30:03,528 I don't like this any more than you do, 1292 01:30:03,528 --> 01:30:04,964 but it has to be done. 1293 01:30:04,964 --> 01:30:07,445 Mush, mush, you dogs! 1294 01:30:07,445 --> 01:30:08,794 Haul your case, 1295 01:30:08,794 --> 01:30:11,667 you horrid little corgi! 1296 01:30:20,806 --> 01:30:22,242 So Humphrey used the portable door 1297 01:30:22,242 --> 01:30:24,331 to get my soul to the Bank of the Dead. 1298 01:30:24,331 --> 01:30:25,898 - And to trap me. 1299 01:30:25,898 --> 01:30:28,466 But then it went missing, so he needed Paul to find it. 1300 01:30:30,250 --> 01:30:31,469 Nope. 1301 01:30:35,342 --> 01:30:37,388 - How did he trap you here? 1302 01:30:39,172 --> 01:30:40,347 He tricked me. 1303 01:30:42,045 --> 01:30:44,613 My baby dragon was used to lure me in. 1304 01:30:46,049 --> 01:30:48,486 A very simple trick, really. I shouldn't have fallen for it. 1305 01:30:48,486 --> 01:30:49,835 So cruel. 1306 01:30:51,315 --> 01:30:52,795 He left me with my books. 1307 01:30:52,795 --> 01:30:55,319 - Why? - Something to read. 1308 01:30:55,319 --> 01:30:57,321 I mean, why here? 1309 01:30:57,321 --> 01:31:01,499 Oh, it's the only place to hold a Great Wizard. 1310 01:31:01,499 --> 01:31:03,632 I'll be here forever. 1311 01:31:03,632 --> 01:31:04,502 It's different for you. 1312 01:31:06,852 --> 01:31:08,506 You'll run out of food and water in a few days 1313 01:31:08,506 --> 01:31:10,465 and die a messy death. 1314 01:31:11,901 --> 01:31:15,295 And I'll be stuck with a couple of decomposing corpses 1315 01:31:15,295 --> 01:31:16,471 and no place to put 'em. 1316 01:31:34,532 --> 01:31:36,186 I'm OK! 1317 01:32:23,233 --> 01:32:24,756 Found something! 1318 01:32:26,758 --> 01:32:28,499 This one actually goes somewhere. 1319 01:32:33,417 --> 01:32:34,766 Not possible. 1320 01:32:50,782 --> 01:32:52,262 I'm free! 1321 01:32:52,262 --> 01:32:54,220 I'm f--I'm fr-- Paul Carpenter, 1322 01:32:54,220 --> 01:32:56,745 you may be more than just a Diviner. 1323 01:32:56,745 --> 01:32:58,268 Maybe you're a... 1324 01:32:58,268 --> 01:32:59,965 Yeah, let's go down a bit. 1325 01:32:59,965 --> 01:33:01,663 Maybe I'm a what? 1326 01:33:02,664 --> 01:33:04,491 I really wish he'd finish the sentence. 1327 01:33:08,452 --> 01:33:10,628 Mr. Wells! You're alive! 1328 01:33:10,628 --> 01:33:12,412 Yes, very much, Rosie. 1329 01:33:12,412 --> 01:33:14,284 Unfortunately you might be too late. 1330 01:33:14,284 --> 01:33:16,721 Right! Now it's up to you two. 1331 01:33:16,721 --> 01:33:18,244 Take this to the Bank of the Dead. 1332 01:33:18,244 --> 01:33:20,290 That will give me control of Humphrey. 1333 01:33:20,290 --> 01:33:22,422 Actually, I'll come with you. 1334 01:33:22,422 --> 01:33:23,902 Um... 1335 01:33:23,902 --> 01:33:25,600 Uh, Rosie, get your husband. 1336 01:33:35,087 --> 01:33:36,611 Just follow me. 1337 01:33:38,874 --> 01:33:40,527 ...you disgusting little trolls! 1338 01:33:42,791 --> 01:33:45,184 Those are the contracts. All those souls. 1339 01:33:45,184 --> 01:33:47,491 The door must be nearby. 1340 01:33:48,405 --> 01:33:50,320 Dennis, make them move! 1341 01:33:50,320 --> 01:33:51,669 Or do they need more incentive? 1342 01:33:51,669 --> 01:33:53,932 I'm very creative with incentive! 1343 01:33:53,932 --> 01:33:56,674 Come now, come along. You heard Mr. Wells. 1344 01:33:56,674 --> 01:33:57,980 You heard Mr... 1345 01:33:57,980 --> 01:33:59,808 You! What do you think you're doing?! 1346 01:33:59,808 --> 01:34:01,679 Tea break is over. What do you think this is, 1347 01:34:01,679 --> 01:34:03,768 Fortnum and bloody Mason?! 1348 01:34:03,768 --> 01:34:06,684 And you! Get off your lardy arse! 1349 01:34:06,684 --> 01:34:09,295 Come along now. Everybody! Come along! 1350 01:34:09,295 --> 01:34:12,298 This is not Buckingham Palace! It's not a garden party! 1351 01:34:12,298 --> 01:34:14,518 It's not a garden party! 1352 01:34:14,518 --> 01:34:16,346 The Bank is open. 1353 01:34:16,346 --> 01:34:18,827 Your contract will be inside. 1354 01:34:18,827 --> 01:34:20,002 Where's Humphrey? 1355 01:34:20,002 --> 01:34:20,829 I'll take care of him. 1356 01:34:22,613 --> 01:34:24,789 You just take that contract into the Bank. 1357 01:34:24,789 --> 01:34:27,052 Once it's deposited, he's mine. 1358 01:34:27,052 --> 01:34:29,315 Well, well, well... 1359 01:34:29,315 --> 01:34:30,795 Hurry it up! Keep moving! 1360 01:34:40,718 --> 01:34:41,850 It's Mr. Wells! 1361 01:34:43,939 --> 01:34:45,027 Hello, Father. 1362 01:34:49,509 --> 01:34:51,207 Go! 1363 01:34:52,425 --> 01:34:54,689 The Bank waits for no man. Get back to work. 1364 01:35:04,568 --> 01:35:06,918 Keep calm! 1365 01:35:06,918 --> 01:35:08,093 Back to work! 1366 01:35:08,093 --> 01:35:10,095 Get up! Get up there! Get up! 1367 01:35:15,927 --> 01:35:18,538 - Sophie! - Paul, Paul, the door! 1368 01:35:18,538 --> 01:35:19,888 - Get it to the Bank! - Get him! 1369 01:35:19,888 --> 01:35:22,151 The door! Paul! 1370 01:35:23,761 --> 01:35:26,546 Get off! 1371 01:35:26,546 --> 01:35:28,723 Get off! It's unseemly! Get off that man! 1372 01:35:52,007 --> 01:35:53,138 Paul! 1373 01:35:54,923 --> 01:35:56,968 Countess, we need you. 1374 01:35:56,968 --> 01:35:58,578 Humphrey is stealing millions of souls 1375 01:35:58,578 --> 01:36:00,580 and now he's going to kill John Wells! 1376 01:36:03,627 --> 01:36:05,281 Eric? Are you all right? 1377 01:36:06,848 --> 01:36:08,632 Sophie! 1378 01:36:08,632 --> 01:36:09,981 Get off! 1379 01:36:17,989 --> 01:36:19,338 You OK? 1380 01:36:23,952 --> 01:36:24,909 Mr. Tanner! 1381 01:36:24,909 --> 01:36:27,433 - Yes? Help! 1382 01:36:27,433 --> 01:36:28,521 Don't do it, Dennis! 1383 01:36:29,958 --> 01:36:32,003 No. No, Sir Humphrey, of course not. 1384 01:36:32,003 --> 01:36:32,830 No, no, no, no... 1385 01:36:32,830 --> 01:36:34,484 Sorry about this, Paul. 1386 01:36:34,484 --> 01:36:35,615 Just obeying orders. 1387 01:36:35,615 --> 01:36:37,139 Comfort slot. 1388 01:36:37,139 --> 01:36:39,445 It's Monty, and if I had my way, 1389 01:36:39,445 --> 01:36:41,926 I'd shtonk that Humphrey in the uhab. 1390 01:36:41,926 --> 01:36:44,624 What? - Paul! 1391 01:36:44,624 --> 01:36:45,756 Mum! 1392 01:36:47,323 --> 01:36:49,804 Mr. Wells! It's Arthur! 1393 01:37:13,523 --> 01:37:14,872 Arthur! 1394 01:37:14,872 --> 01:37:17,570 Rosie! My love! 1395 01:37:22,097 --> 01:37:23,489 Oh... 1396 01:37:23,489 --> 01:37:25,361 Dad, you're back! 1397 01:37:27,102 --> 01:37:28,581 Dennis! 1398 01:37:35,023 --> 01:37:39,027 Ooh, have we been weakened by the Nether? 1399 01:37:39,027 --> 01:37:41,072 Paul! Run! 1400 01:37:42,204 --> 01:37:43,205 Look out, Paul! 1401 01:37:51,691 --> 01:37:53,998 Humphrey... Humphrey, this is completely 1402 01:37:53,998 --> 01:37:55,347 against the Magician's Code of Conduct. 1403 01:37:55,347 --> 01:37:56,914 Not one step closer. 1404 01:37:58,916 --> 01:38:02,441 Seems my father's not as powerful as he thought he was. 1405 01:38:02,441 --> 01:38:03,747 What are you going to do, Humphrey? 1406 01:38:03,747 --> 01:38:04,791 You'll have to kill us all. 1407 01:38:04,791 --> 01:38:06,532 Please, Humphrey, stop this now. 1408 01:38:06,532 --> 01:38:08,752 All I ever wanted was to think big. 1409 01:38:10,232 --> 01:38:13,104 You weren't brave enough. 1410 01:38:13,104 --> 01:38:15,019 This company was behind the moon landing, 1411 01:38:15,019 --> 01:38:17,065 the splitting of the atom! 1412 01:38:17,065 --> 01:38:18,893 For what? 1413 01:38:18,893 --> 01:38:20,590 Are humans still ruining everything? 1414 01:38:20,590 --> 01:38:22,461 Of course they are. 1415 01:38:22,461 --> 01:38:25,377 Do they realize what we do for them? 1416 01:38:25,377 --> 01:38:27,075 Of course they don't. 1417 01:38:34,647 --> 01:38:37,955 I will continue my plan alone, 1418 01:38:37,955 --> 01:38:41,872 now that the traitors have been smoked out. 1419 01:38:43,352 --> 01:38:45,832 Yeah, rebellion's over. You're all going to the Nether. 1420 01:38:45,832 --> 01:38:48,096 But first... 1421 01:38:48,096 --> 01:38:49,010 You. 1422 01:38:50,272 --> 01:38:51,838 Bring it over. 1423 01:38:54,015 --> 01:38:55,930 - No! 1424 01:38:55,930 --> 01:38:57,540 - Humphrey, enough! 1425 01:38:59,455 --> 01:39:00,978 Now, Carpenter. 1426 01:39:04,286 --> 01:39:08,638 I want you to bring that damn contract over to me. 1427 01:39:11,467 --> 01:39:15,123 I want you to bring my soul over to me. 1428 01:39:17,038 --> 01:39:21,999 And I will hold it in front of my father's fading eyes 1429 01:39:21,999 --> 01:39:24,871 and I want to tear it to shreds. 1430 01:39:28,005 --> 01:39:30,138 Because the last thing you will see 1431 01:39:30,138 --> 01:39:32,531 is the end of your hold over me. 1432 01:39:32,531 --> 01:39:34,185 I... 1433 01:39:34,185 --> 01:39:38,146 What? What? No. Sorry. Can't understand. 1434 01:39:38,146 --> 01:39:40,365 Did anyone understand what...? No? 1435 01:39:42,237 --> 01:39:43,716 Carpenter. Let's have it. 1436 01:39:45,153 --> 01:39:46,806 No, Paul. - Come on. 1437 01:39:46,806 --> 01:39:47,894 Paul, don't do it, please. 1438 01:39:50,071 --> 01:39:51,159 You can't give it to him. 1439 01:39:51,159 --> 01:39:55,032 Get moving. Don't listen to them. 1440 01:39:55,032 --> 01:39:55,902 Paul... 1441 01:39:57,382 --> 01:39:58,688 Paul. 1442 01:40:00,255 --> 01:40:01,865 If you can hear me, touch your ear. 1443 01:40:04,215 --> 01:40:06,174 In the Nether, with all those doors... 1444 01:40:06,174 --> 01:40:08,393 Keep on keeping on! 1445 01:40:08,393 --> 01:40:11,005 ...what if you didn't find the way out? 1446 01:40:12,876 --> 01:40:14,182 What if you created it? 1447 01:40:17,054 --> 01:40:18,969 The Bank is right below you. 1448 01:40:22,625 --> 01:40:25,062 Make your own door, Paul. 1449 01:40:26,237 --> 01:40:28,022 Keep going! Come on! 1450 01:41:14,764 --> 01:41:16,896 He's... vanished. 1451 01:41:16,896 --> 01:41:17,984 Where did he go? 1452 01:41:57,372 --> 01:41:58,373 Next, please. 1453 01:42:02,638 --> 01:42:05,162 Mr. Carpenter. 1454 01:42:05,162 --> 01:42:10,167 You're not due here for 142 years. 1455 01:42:10,167 --> 01:42:12,691 Um... 1456 01:42:12,691 --> 01:42:14,563 I'd like to make a deposit. 1457 01:42:35,236 --> 01:42:36,585 Actually... 1458 01:42:38,674 --> 01:42:40,066 I'd like to make a trade. 1459 01:42:46,377 --> 01:42:47,552 There, Mr. Wells. 1460 01:42:47,552 --> 01:42:49,206 He's done it. 1461 01:42:49,206 --> 01:42:50,990 You've got his soul. 1462 01:42:50,990 --> 01:42:51,687 Quickly. 1463 01:42:53,906 --> 01:42:55,386 - The door. - The door! 1464 01:42:55,386 --> 01:42:56,605 Sophie, quickly, get the door. 1465 01:42:59,869 --> 01:43:01,087 Knock, knock. 1466 01:43:23,588 --> 01:43:24,372 No. 1467 01:43:26,287 --> 01:43:28,376 No. 1468 01:43:28,376 --> 01:43:30,073 Please... 1469 01:43:34,904 --> 01:43:36,775 Please. Please. 1470 01:43:49,614 --> 01:43:51,399 Daddy, please. Please. 1471 01:43:55,229 --> 01:43:56,491 - John. - You must. 1472 01:43:59,102 --> 01:44:00,495 Go. 1473 01:44:12,855 --> 01:44:15,292 Sophie, will you get the door, please? 1474 01:44:21,472 --> 01:44:23,866 He's gone! It's over! 1475 01:44:25,128 --> 01:44:26,564 Oh, at last you're back. 1476 01:44:34,268 --> 01:44:36,095 What are you doing? 1477 01:44:36,095 --> 01:44:38,750 This door will never be opened again. 1478 01:44:38,750 --> 01:44:40,143 But what about Paul? 1479 01:44:41,884 --> 01:44:43,451 How do we get him back? 1480 01:44:46,671 --> 01:44:48,325 - Sophie... 1481 01:45:09,128 --> 01:45:10,956 Oh, um... 1482 01:45:10,956 --> 01:45:14,177 I think this belongs to you? 1483 01:45:30,193 --> 01:45:32,413 Dad! Mum! No! 1484 01:45:34,589 --> 01:45:35,851 We did it, Paul. 1485 01:45:38,549 --> 01:45:40,246 Not quite. 1486 01:45:46,035 --> 01:45:47,515 Forgot one. 1487 01:46:02,791 --> 01:46:03,966 Take a seat. 1488 01:46:06,055 --> 01:46:07,404 Dennis! 1489 01:46:10,276 --> 01:46:13,236 Don't worry about my turncoat, backstabbing son. 1490 01:46:13,236 --> 01:46:14,759 He won't bother you again, will you, Den...? 1491 01:46:18,546 --> 01:46:20,417 Sorry about that. 1492 01:46:21,679 --> 01:46:23,855 Humphrey had to choose stapler, didn't he? 1493 01:46:23,855 --> 01:46:26,380 Now, first order of business: 1494 01:46:26,380 --> 01:46:28,382 what to do with you two. 1495 01:46:29,600 --> 01:46:31,515 Paul, 1496 01:46:31,515 --> 01:46:34,779 with your... skillset, 1497 01:46:34,779 --> 01:46:38,435 we think you're most suited to a junior position 1498 01:46:38,435 --> 01:46:40,394 in Lost and Found. 1499 01:46:40,394 --> 01:46:41,699 Oh, great. 1500 01:46:41,699 --> 01:46:43,440 You've got to be kidding me. 1501 01:46:43,440 --> 01:46:48,227 The past few years have been a blight on our great firm. 1502 01:46:48,227 --> 01:46:50,447 Are you listening to my thoughts? 1503 01:46:50,447 --> 01:46:51,753 ...capturing of souls is strictly against... 1504 01:46:51,753 --> 01:46:53,450 Sophie? 1505 01:46:53,450 --> 01:46:55,060 - - [John] ...code of conduct. It is indeed. 1506 01:46:55,060 --> 01:46:56,453 You have a tiny weird bug on your forehead. 1507 01:46:59,630 --> 01:47:00,457 Sorry. 1508 01:47:02,938 --> 01:47:06,463 All souls have been returned... 1509 01:47:06,463 --> 01:47:08,422 So now you can hear my thoughts? 1510 01:47:10,032 --> 01:47:11,642 I can't block you out? 1511 01:47:11,642 --> 01:47:13,818 ...ever. Absolutely. 1512 01:47:13,818 --> 01:47:15,994 Good... - OK, then. 1513 01:47:15,994 --> 01:47:20,129 Can I ask, now that you have full control of your instincts, 1514 01:47:20,129 --> 01:47:22,305 your heart, 1515 01:47:22,305 --> 01:47:25,264 do you still feel that way for me? 1516 01:47:25,264 --> 01:47:27,353 And, Sophie, 1517 01:47:27,353 --> 01:47:31,619 with your impressive abilities and your natural talents, 1518 01:47:31,619 --> 01:47:35,623 you'll be fast-tracked to the position of VP 1519 01:47:35,623 --> 01:47:37,538 in the Department of Coincidensation. 1520 01:47:41,324 --> 01:47:43,979 Do you like the sound of that, Sophie? 1521 01:47:44,936 --> 01:47:47,852 So, do you... feel the same? 1522 01:47:47,852 --> 01:47:48,940 Sophie, do you? 1523 01:47:48,940 --> 01:47:51,465 Yes. I do. 1524 01:47:52,988 --> 01:47:54,555 Excellent. 1525 01:48:44,474 --> 01:48:45,997 Housekeeping. Knock, knock. 1526 01:54:04,011 --> 01:54:07,014 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1527 01:54:07,014 --> 01:54:09,886 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm ♪ 1528 01:54:09,886 --> 01:54:12,497 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1529 01:54:12,497 --> 01:54:15,413 ♪ Mm-mm-mm, mm-mm, mm, mm ♪ 1530 01:54:15,413 --> 01:54:18,068 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1531 01:54:18,068 --> 01:54:20,897 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm ♪ 1532 01:54:20,897 --> 01:54:23,682 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1533 01:54:23,682 --> 01:54:26,337 ♪ Mm-mm-mm, mm-mm, mm, mm ♪ 1534 01:54:26,337 --> 01:54:29,036 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm 1535 01:54:29,036 --> 01:54:29,906 ♪ Mm, mm-mm, mm, mm, mm-mm... ♪ 1536 01:54:33,867 --> 01:54:36,521 - ♪ Little bitty pretty one 1537 01:54:36,521 --> 01:54:39,437 ♪ Come on and talk to me... 1538 01:54:39,437 --> 01:54:42,005 - ♪ Lovey dovey, lovey one 1539 01:54:42,005 --> 01:54:45,704 ♪ Come sit down on my knee 1540 01:54:45,704 --> 01:54:48,011 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh 1541 01:54:48,011 --> 01:54:49,926 ♪ Oh, oh, whoa-whoa, whoa-oh... ♪ 1542 01:54:56,759 --> 01:54:59,022 Uh, Lost and Found. Paul speaking. 163515