All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S04E16 Gomer the Good Samaritan 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

What's the matter, Sarge?

I don't believe it.
I just don't believe it.

What don't you believe?

I just came from Colonel Gray's office.

He says that General Prescott's
up in Los Angeles for a staff conference,

and right afterwards he's due back here
at the base for a general inspection.

- So?
- So he wants a man from our outfit

to pick him up and bring him here.

- So?
- Guess which man the colonel wants?

He wants...

Pyle. He's the best man for the job.

Pyle, sir?

- You want Pyle to drive a general?
- Yes.

According to his motor pool record,

he has one of a top driver ratings
on the base.

But I've got lots of drivers, sir...

truck drivers, a bus driver,
a cabbie from New York.

But they don't have Pyle's
mechanical aptitude.

According to this report, Sergeant,

he scored 95 out of a possible 100 points
on the vehicle repair test.

If they had some minor breakdown
on the road,

Pyle would be more than able to handle it.

- Yes, sir.
- And I'm most impressed

with his record for punctuality.

Now, that's very important
with General Prescott.

His nickname is Punctual Pete, you know.

Now, the general is staying at the
Chancellor Hotel on Wilshire Boulevard.

Pyle is to pick him up
at exactly 15:00 hours this afternoon.

Okay. Now, remember, Pyle,

I'm General Prescott and you're waiting
out in front of the hotel to pick me up.

Gotcha, Sergeant... I mean, General.

Okay. Now, let's try it.
This is the staff car.

Good afternoon, General.

I'm your driver,
Private First Class Gomer Pyle.

By the way, how was your meeting?

What do you mean, how was my meeting?
That's none of your business.

After you salute,
just open the door and let me in.

Yes, sir. Just open the door.

What are you doing now, Pyle?

- I was just dusting off the seat.
- Dusting?

You should have done that
before you started out.

- Yes, sir.
- All right.

I'm sitting in the back
and you're driving. Drive.

Yes, sir, Sergeant...

I mean... General.

How's the family, General?

Pyle, what was that?

I was asking the general
how his family was,

you know, to make him feel at home.

You don't ask the general nothin'.

You just drive. You got that?

Yes, sir.

Now, look.

I want you to understand
the importance of this mission.

For two whole hours, all the way from LA
back to Camp Henderson,

the welfare of a United States Marine
Corps general will be in your hands.

Gomer Pyle.

That's a frightening thought.

I know
it's a big responsibility, Sergeant.

Believe me, I won't let you down either.

Is there anything I can get for you
while I'm up there in LA?

Just the general, Pyle.
Just come back with the general.

Now, do you know how to get to LA?

Well, I think I know.

You don't think, Pyle. You gotta be sure.

This is like any other mission.
You gotta plan it.

Yes, sir.

Now, pay close attention.

This is Camp Henderson,
and this is downtown LA.

Hard to believe, ain't it, Sergeant?

What?

All them dots stands for cities
and towns with people in 'em.

People just like you and me,

having their ups and their downs,

their good times and their bad,

happiness one day, heartache the next.

Pyle, will you knock it off!

I'm trying to show you how to get to LA.

Sorry, Sergeant.

All right.

Now, stay on the Santa Ana freeway

till you get to the Civic Center.

Then take the Harbor Freeway

and get off at Wilshire Boulevard,
and you're there.

Seems real simple.

All right. Get the staff car,
get it gassed up, and take off.

Sergeant, we just finished morning chow.

I don't have to pick up the general
till this afternoon at 3:00.

That's more than seven hours away.

That's right.

Because you're not meeting
just General Prescott,

you're meeting Punctual Pete Prescott.
You got that? Punctual.

Always on time.

Golly, Sergeant.
It only takes two hours to drive up to LA.

That means I have five hours to wait.

It never hurts to be early.

Give me your finger.

- My finger?
- Yeah.

We might as well make sure.

Santa Ana Freeway to Civic Center.

Take the Harbor Freeway.

Get off at Wilshire Boulevard.

- Okay. Let's take it again from the top.
- Okay.

Now, let's take it again from the top.

Hey, ma'am. You having some trouble?

Oh, yes. I'm afraid so.

I was driving along
and all of a sudden the car went dead.

I tried starting it again,
but nothing happens.

Well, you got plenty of gas.
You can see that.

I know. I had it filled
when I had the car washed yesterday.

With 15 gallons, you get a free wash.

Well, ain't that nice?

It's Hill East Car Wash
on Olympic Boulevard.

They do a nice, clean job.

Well, thank you, ma'am.

Uh, I really don't know what could
be wrong with your car, though.

Well... I have a suggestion.

I just don't understand it, ma'am.
I've been pushing you for miles,

and she just don't seem to kick over.

It's probably your generator,
and I think you better call a tow truck.

Oh, that's all right.

- I'm home now.
- Home?

Yes. I live right over there.

Thank you for pushing me all the way home.

That's okay, ma'am.
But could you tell me where we are?

- Van Nuys.
- Where?

Van Nuys, the garden spot of the valley.

Haven't you ever heard of it?

Well, I'm afraid I haven't, ma'am.

But is it anywhere near downtown LA?

Well, no.

By freeway,
you'll make it back in no time at all.

You just turn right at the next corner.

And then you go three blocks
till you get to the freeway ramp,

and then all you have to do
is follow the signs.

Thank you, ma'am. Just follow the signs.

Goodbye.

And remember, defensive driving.

Van Nuys?
What are you doing way over there?

You're supposed to be downtown
waiting for General Prescott.

Well, you see,
as I was coming off the freeway ramp,

there was this nice lady
standing by a stalled car.

- And you stopped to help her?
- Well, yes.

I mean, I just couldn't leave her there
standing in traffic.

Look Pyle, I don't care
if she was on top of a skyscraper

hanging by her fingertips.

You're supposed to be waiting
for General Prescott at his hotel.

That's exactly why I called, Sergeant.

You see, on account of my new location,
I thought we better plot a new course.

Boyle, give me that map.

Here we are, Sarge. Here's Van Nuys,
right over by North Hollywood.

All right. We've got you pinpointed, Pyle.

Now, let's see.

Here's what you do.

You get on
the Ventura Freeway heading east,

and then you get on the Hollywood Freeway.

And you stay on it
till you get to the downtown turnoff,

heading east.

Then you turn on the Harbor Freeway,
heading south,

and you get off at the Sixth Street exit
and you're there.

Okay, Sergeant. I've got a pencil.
Go ahead.

Santa Monica?
What are you doing in Santa Monica?

Well, I know I'm way off course, Sergeant.

But believe me,
I just couldn't help myself.

I gave you explicit directions.
Why didn't you follow 'em?

I did, Sergeant, honest I did.

But you see,
when I swung out on the freeway,

I got stuck over in the fast lane somehow.

And then when I saw
the downtown cut-off sign,

the traffic was so heavy
I just couldn't get over.

I signaled, and I honked,
but it just wasn't no use.

And I had to keep going
until I hit Santa Monica.

That ever happen to you, Sergeant?

Map, map, map!

Here you go, Sarge.

Here. Here's Santa Monica.

Hmm. All right.

I got Santa Monica, Pyle.
Have you got a pencil?

[horn blaring]

[speaking angrily in Italian]

- Are you all right, mister?
- Yeah, I'm okay.

You see that guy there? He's a crazy.
You see what he do?

Well, he wasn't
paying much attention, was he?

Here, let me help you.

Nobody watching nobody no more.
Driving like crazy!

- That's all illegal.
- Some people are careless.

Here. Let's get out of the way over here.

[speaking Italian]

Thank you very much. You very nice.

- What's your name?
- Gomer Pyle.

Gomo Pyle!
I knew right away you Italiano, huh?

Well, I'm afraid I ain't,
but I sure do like pizza,

and nobody sings better than Dean Martin.

Yes, I see you have good taste.

It's nice to meet you, Gomo.

Thank you very much again,
and bye-bye now.

Well, wait a minute. How far do you
have to take all these groceries?

Oh, I live very close, only ten blocks.

Ten blocks?

Sure was a lot faster
than walking, wasn't it?

You are very kind man.

Please come into the house
and meet the wife.

Well, thank you, Mr. Barbella,
but I'd better be on my way.

But just for a few minutes, huh?

My wife, she always say
nobody help nobody no more.

People, they just think of themselves.

I want her to meet you

and show there's
some really nice people in the world.

Well, that's real nice of you,
Mr. Barbella, but I...

Come on. Come on. We give you cola drink.

I've really got something very important
I've got to do, Mr. Barbella.

I just couldn't.

Some more lasagna, Mr. Gomo Pyle?

No, Mrs. Barbella,
I couldn't eat another bite.

- Oh... you don't like it.
- Oh, no, ma'am. I loved it.

I wouldn't have had three helpings
if I didn't. It was delicious.

Then you have some more, eh?

Honestly, Mrs. Barbella,
I just don't have any more room.

And besides, I've got some really
important Marine business

I have to take care of.
Thank you for a wonderful lunch.

And it's been a pleasure meeting you two.

Wait, Mr. Gomo Pyle.

I bet you you know our grandson,
Private Tony Calucci.

Tony Calucci...

Cara mia, how many times
do I have to tell you?

Our Tony is in the army.

Gomo Pyle is a Marine.
How they gonna meet?

Eh, army, Marine.
Our Tony is very popular.

He make lots of friends. Look.

This is his picture.

So if you meet him,
you know what he look like.

He's a real handsome boy all right.

Handsome!

Oh, you should see him
when he graduate from high school.

Oh, if you only had time
to look at all the pictures.

And this is my sister, Rosa.

And these are all her children. Look.

And here. Here, Gomo Pyle.
This is my brother, Mario.

He is a gondolier in Venice.
Oh, you should hear him sing.

A regular Caruso.

Well, now, I really want to thank you both
for your hospitality,

but I've got to be going now.

If you'll just tell me which freeway
I take to get downtown?

Oh, that's easy.

You go two blocks from here,

and you see the San Diego Freeway
going south.

No. No. No. No. That's a long way.

You listen to me, Gomo Pyle.

You take the Santa Monica Freeway
going east,

and then you take
the Hollywood interchange.

No, not Hollywood.
Do you want him to get lost?

What's the matter with you?
No. Listen, Gomo Pyle.

- You go to the San Diego Freeway.
- No, no, no.

He don't know anything.
You no listen to him. No...

[she gives directions rapidly]

[they bicker]

[squabbling continues]

[phone rings]

Company B, Corporal Boyle speaking.

It's our man in Los Angeles again.

You talk to him.

If he's lost, I don't want to talk to him.

Are you lost again?

- He's lost again.
- Let me talk to him.

All right, Pyle. What now? What now?

I hate to keep bothering you
like this, Sergeant,

but I'm a little off course again.

Where are you?

Pasadena.

What are you doing in Pasadena?

Well, you see, I met this Mr. Barbella...

That's enough.

Now, you stay right where you are.
I'm gonna come up there

and do the job myself.
I'm relieving you of this assignment.

Oh, no, Sergeant, don't do that.
I can do the job. Honest I can.

Give me another chance, Sergeant.
Just one more chance, please.

All right. All right.
I'll give you one more chance,

but this time you drive straight
to that hotel and no detours.

- You understand?
- Yes, sir, Sergeant.

And I won't let you down neither.

There's just one more thing, though.

How do I get there from here?

I'm about a half a block
from the Rose Bowl.

You know, where they play
that big football game every year.

I know.

Just think, Sergeant,
if this was New Year's Day,

I wouldn't be able
to get anywhere nears this place.

The map. The map. The map.

Colorado Boulevard,
Pasadena Freeway going south,

then cut over to the Harbor Freeway,

and then straight on in downtown.

Hi there. Where are you going? On a hike?

Nowhere, I'm afraid.

We're supposed to be on an outing,

but we missed that bus
that would have taken us downtown.

Oh, well, that's a shame.

- [kids squealing]
- This the place you wanted, ma'am?

Oh, yes.

We'll catch our bus
right here at the station.

Thank you very much for the ride.
You're very kind.

Oh, it was nothing,
but I have kind of lost my bearings.

Could you tell me
how I get to Wilshire Boulevard?

Wilshire Boulevard. Let's see.
Oh, I wish my husband was here.

- He's so good at directions.
- Oh, well, that's okay.

I know it's around here somewhere.

I'll just ask over here at this
gas station. You all have a good time.

Hi there, buddy. What'll it be?
Custom octane,

golden high test, or supersonic supreme?

Well, nothing, thank you.
I don't really need any gas.

- I just wanted to ask you...
- Oh, I know.

You're here for the Lucky Country contest.

- Lucky Country contest?
- Yeah.

Here is a card
with a map of half a country on it.

If you get another card with
the matching half of the same country,

we'll send you there all expenses paid.

No kidding!

Two of our best customers
just left this morning for Iceland.

That's wonderful.

But to be honest with you,
that ain't the reason I come in.

I only wanted to ask you
how to get to Wilshire Boulevard.

Wilshire Boulevard?
Two blocks up and turn right.

Well, thank you very much,
and good luck with your contest.

Wait a minute. Hang on a second, Marine.

- You forgot your demitasse cup.
- Demitasse cup?

That's right.

Just for stopping by.

And the next time you come in,
I'll see you get a matching saucer.

Well, thanks so much.

I'll be sure
and tell all my friends about it.

You do that.

Hey, fellers. Where you going?
What happened?

Oh, the last bus left ten minutes ago,
and we just missed it.

The boys are so disappointed.

You're at Disneyland?

Well, I hadn't really planned on it,
Sergeant,

but those little fellers
looked so disappointed.

Now do see why
I sent you up there seven hours early

and it still wasn't early enough?

Knowing you, I should have
sent you up there a week ago.

Believe me, there's nothing to be
concerned about. I'm leaving right now.

And by the way, Sergeant,
I sure do wish you was here with me.

The Matterhorn looks so beautiful,

and the monorail, the enchanted castle.

Pyle, shut up! Boyle!

Hello? Sergeant Carter? It's me again.

Don't tell me, Pyle.

Don't you dare tell me.

Oh, I'm not lost, Sergeant.

I just called to tell you that
I'm right here by the general's hotel.

You hear that, Boyle?

Pyle made it!

What about the general? Where is he?

Well, I'm a couple of minutes early,

so I just took time out to call you
and set your mind at ease,

'cause I knew how upset you was.
All's well that ends well.

All right, Pyle. You made it.

Now, you just go out to the car
and wait for him.

Just sit and wait.

Oh, I will, Sergeant.

You can rest assured.

Hey, there he is, Sergeant. There he is.
It's him, Sergeant.

That's the general all right,
and he's right on time.

Never mind the comments, Pyle.
Just hang up and go get him.

Right, Sergeant. We're on our way.

Hey, buddy, buddy.
Are you driving that staff car back there?

- Yeah.
- Listen, pal. You gotta help me.

- Could I get you a taxi, General?
- No, thanks.

I'm expecting a staff car to pick me up.
Should be here any minute.

Well, here he is now.

- What the...?
- Are you all right, General?

Yes, I'm all right, but I can't say the
same for the Marine driving that car.

- Where's a phone?
- Right here.

What are you so nervous about, Sarge?
Why don't you sit down and relax?

I can't relax.

I can't relax until Pyle drives up here
with that general.

Do you mind?

I don't know what you're so worried about.

Pyle just called. He said he saw
the general. What could go wrong?

What could go wrong with Pyle?

He could run him over. He could slam the
door on his fingers. Oh, lots of things.

Ten-hut!

As you were.

Sergeant, have you heard
from Private Pyle at all?

As a matter of fact, I have, sir.
Several times.

It seems he got lost,
but there's nothing to worry about, sir.

The last time I heard from him,
he was at the hotel right on time.

Very interesting.

I just got a phone call
from General Prescott.

The staff car took off without him.

Without the general?

That's right, and it nearly
knocked him down in the process.

What got into Pyle?

I can't understand it, sir.

Unless it was all that freeway driving
and the smog,

it must have got to him.

Well, General Prescott's fit to be tied.
If we don't do something, Sergeant,

there'll be fallout
from here back to the Pentagon.

Yes, sir.
I'll get another man on it right away.

PFC Hummel.
He's a very trustworthy man, sir.

No. This is too important.
You and I better get up there ourselves

and hope for the best. My car is outside.

Yes, sir.

Well, Sergeant, what is it?
Where's General Prescott?

Well, I don't know
how to tell you this, sir.

- I can hardly believe it myself.
- What is it? Out with it.

Well, General Prescott, sir,
he just left for...

- the hospital.
- The hospital?

Oh, no. He probably stood outside
so long he got sunstroke.

- Let's go.
- Yes, sir.

It's General Prescott.

And Pyle.

What are those policemen
and that photographer doing?

Well, the general
probably caught up with Pyle, sir,

and had him placed under arrest.

Now, uh, let's get one
with just the general and Pyle here.

General Prescott.
I'm Colonel Gray from Camp Henderson.

- Colonel Gray.
- Colonel Gray, Sergeant Carter,

what a nice surprise.
What are y'all doing way up here?

Sir, I want to apologize
for what's happened today.

I sent this man to pick you up,
and I regret the unfortunate incident.

Nonsense. If Pyle had picked me up
when he was supposed to,

we never would have had the baby.

Baby, sir?

Eight pounds, nine ounces.

Cutest little girl
you ever laid your eyes on.

Pyle here is responsible
for bringing her into the world.

If Gomer hadn't let us use the staff car
when my cab broke down,

we would have never gotten
Mrs. Rodriguez to the hospital.

A quick-thinking man here, Colonel.
Even thought up a name for the baby.

Eleanora.

Yes, sir. A good man. That's why
we picked him for the assignment.

Well, it's almost 18:00. If I'm due at
Camp Henderson, we better get going.

Yes, sir. My car is right this way.

It'll be an honor to drive you, sir.
A real privilege.

Thank you, Sergeant, but if you don't
mind, I think I'll drive back with Pyle.

- With Pyle, sir?
- Yes.

He did come to pick me up.

I'm sure he'll be very good company.

- Coming, Colonel?
- Yes, sir.

- Pyle?
- Bye, Sergeant.

Have a real nice trip back
and don't forget to drive careful.

I just don't understand it.
Where could the sergeant be?

Yeah, I'm beginning to wonder myself.

We've been back for over two hours,
and the sergeant left right after we did.

I sure hope
he didn't run into any trouble.

Well, maybe he stopped for something
to eat or ran into some heavy traffic.

- Well, I sure hope nothing happened.
- [door opens]

Sergeant Carter.
Boy, are we glad to see you.

We was just talking about you.
Why are you so late? Is everything okay?

We were really getting worried, Sarge.
You're two hours overdue.

- What happened?
- What happened? What happened?

Don't you guys have anything
better to do than nose around?

Yeah, but two hours, Sarge.
That's a long time.

Yeah, that's way too long, Sergeant.
Did you get lost?

None of your business.

You did, didn't you, Sergeant?

And I bet I can tell you why.

When you went to take
the Santa Ana Freeway going south,

you took the wrong ramp

and got on the Golden State Freeway
going west.

Is that what you did, Sergeant?
Is that what you did?

None of your business, Pyle.

That's terrible, Sergeant.

How come you didn't give us a call?

Where's the map, Corporal Boyle?
I can show you exactly what he did.

At that particular interchange, the Santa
Ana Freeway and the Golden State Freeway,

they kind of come together.
And it's real easy...