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1
00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:04,588
[marching band plays]
2
00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:11,803
[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.
3
00:00:14,806 --> 00:00:17,643
Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.
4
00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:22,564
Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.
5
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:32,991
Excuse me, Sergeant.
6
00:00:32,991 --> 00:00:35,035
Private Slater reporting
to pick up a pass, Sarge.
7
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:35,994
Huh?
8
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:37,996
Oh, yeah, Slater.
9
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,293
Here you are.
10
00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:44,711
Me too, Sergeant.
11
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:46,505
You, Pyle?
12
00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:48,840
You really think you deserve a pass
13
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,718
after what happened out on
the infiltration course this afternoon?
14
00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:55,889
- Sir?
- The barbed wire, Pyle, the barbed wire.
15
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:59,184
Them big wire fences
with all the sharp little things?
16
00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:00,852
Or maybe you don't remember
17
00:01:00,852 --> 00:01:03,564
I had to crawl 100 yards on my belly
to turn you loose.
18
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,649
- Oh, that.
- Yeah, that.
19
00:01:05,649 --> 00:01:08,485
And that and that and that.
20
00:01:09,111 --> 00:01:11,655
Golly, Sergeant, you know how sorry I am.
21
00:01:11,655 --> 00:01:13,156
I didn't mean to get you hung up, too.
22
00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,492
Here, take your pass, Pyle.
23
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:18,036
The further away from here you are,
the better I like it.
24
00:01:18,036 --> 00:01:19,079
Yes, sir.
25
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:23,250
And, Sergeant, all those things
you said to me out there today,
26
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:26,587
about being an awful,
terrible specimen of a soldier?
27
00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:29,047
I deserved it.
I deserved every word of it.
28
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:31,800
Look, Pyle, beat it, will you,
before I change my mind?
29
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:32,884
Yes, sir.
30
00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:37,306
I just didn't want you to think
I didn't appreciate your criticism.
31
00:01:37,306 --> 00:01:40,559
'Cause it's not every sergeant
that pays that much attention to one man.
32
00:01:40,559 --> 00:01:44,187
Pyle, if you're not out of here
in exactly one second...
33
00:01:44,187 --> 00:01:46,148
See there, that's just what
I was talking about.
34
00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:48,859
Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out!
35
00:01:51,403 --> 00:01:53,447
Well, so much for the tender farewells.
36
00:01:54,281 --> 00:01:55,407
Where you off to, Gome?
37
00:01:55,991 --> 00:02:00,412
Oh, well, I just thought I'd go into town
and investigate something, that's all.
38
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:01,538
Oh, yeah, what's that?
39
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:03,665
Gosh, Duke.
40
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:05,751
I really oughtn't say right now.
41
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:06,752
Huh?
42
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:10,339
But if it's any good,
you'll be the first to know about it,
43
00:02:10,339 --> 00:02:11,632
and that's a promise.
44
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,509
Come on, Gome, now you got me curious.
Give me a little hint.
45
00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:15,594
No, Duke.
46
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:17,888
It's just that I want to make sure
about it first myself
47
00:02:17,888 --> 00:02:19,222
before I say anything.
48
00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:22,100
You're certainly turning into
a man of mystery.
49
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,895
Well, it's not that, Duke,
it's just that there's a lot of difference
50
00:02:24,895 --> 00:02:28,106
between a rumor and a fact.
And so far, all I know is just a rumor.
51
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:30,525
Well, at least we can take the bus
into town together.
52
00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:33,695
Oh, uh, Gomer, if it's the new
coffee and cake out at the YWCA,
53
00:02:33,695 --> 00:02:35,989
you don't have to worry.
I already know about that.
54
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,742
Oh, it's something different, Duke,
something entirely different.
55
00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,371
Ma'am.
56
00:02:47,918 --> 00:02:50,087
Don't tell me you're ready for dessert?
57
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,797
Well, to tell you the truth, ma'am,
58
00:02:51,797 --> 00:02:54,216
I thought I'd have another order
of the very same thing.
59
00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:56,510
Another Welsh rarebit?
60
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:59,429
Ma'am, you're looking at
a Welsh rarebit fiend.
61
00:02:59,429 --> 00:03:00,764
I just can't help myself.
62
00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:04,059
- Is that so?
- It's just awful, ain't it?
63
00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:06,561
I don't know when I've been
so ashamed of myself.
64
00:03:06,561 --> 00:03:08,438
It's gluttony, just pure gluttony.
65
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:09,731
What?
66
00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:12,859
For not being able to control my craving
for Welsh rarebit.
67
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:15,487
I can eat it till the cows come home,
if it's good.
68
00:03:15,487 --> 00:03:17,614
And yours is good,
just like I heard it was.
69
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,241
Well, thank you.
70
00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:22,703
My sister and I could always
do with compliments like that.
71
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:24,746
I'll let you in on something else, too.
72
00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:27,958
Welsh rarebit is my one vice in life,
73
00:03:27,958 --> 00:03:30,377
no matter how hard I try to stop myself.
74
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,462
Now really, young man,
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00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:34,881
I don't think
that's such a terrible thing.
76
00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:38,051
Oh, it is, it's terrible,
terrible, terrible.
77
00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:46,393
My goodness, you weren't joking
when you said was a Welsh rarebit fiend.
78
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,228
Well, it's terrible, ain't it,
just terrible.
79
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,021
Oh, I don't know.
80
00:03:50,021 --> 00:03:52,566
You're a Marine, you're supposed to eat.
81
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:54,818
Just so long as it doesn't affect you.
82
00:03:55,318 --> 00:03:57,446
Affect me? How could it affect me?
83
00:03:57,446 --> 00:03:59,531
You know, at night.
84
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:00,782
Ma'am?
85
00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:03,744
They say the Welsh rarebit
gives you bad dreams.
86
00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,120
Oh, that.
87
00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:06,663
I've heard about that.
88
00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:08,540
I suspect it's just a big fairy tale.
89
00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:11,042
Well, I don't know about that.
90
00:04:11,877 --> 00:04:15,797
I'll never forget what happened
one night to Mr. Jennings.
91
00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:17,716
He was my first husband.
92
00:04:17,716 --> 00:04:19,050
Poor man.
93
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:24,389
Anyway, he ate Welsh rarebit
for dinner, just like you're doing,
94
00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:26,641
and you won't believe what happened.
95
00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:27,934
What?
96
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:30,645
I woke up at 2:00 in the morning.
97
00:04:30,645 --> 00:04:32,731
There he was,
98
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:35,275
painting the kitchen walls...
99
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,068
in his pajamas.
100
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,946
2:00 in the morning,
101
00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:42,073
and his eyes wide open.
102
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,159
You mean, he was asleep?
103
00:04:44,159 --> 00:04:46,369
Sound asleep.
104
00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:48,747
I had to shake the ladder to wake him up.
105
00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,291
- Really?
- Yes, indeed.
106
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:54,878
I never did feed him Welsh rarebit again.
107
00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:56,922
- And you know what?
- What?
108
00:04:57,464 --> 00:05:00,884
He never did finish painting the kitchen.
109
00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:06,014
[muttering]
110
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[banging on door]
111
00:05:29,621 --> 00:05:31,915
- What's that?
- I don't know.
112
00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:34,334
Coming!
113
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,919
I'm coming, I'm com... Oh!
114
00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,296
Get that, Boyle, get it.
115
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,301
Pyle, what is this?
Do you know what time it is?
116
00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:46,137
Yes, I do. Sergeant, it's high time
you and I set things straight
117
00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:48,932
about what happened out there
on that infiltration course yesterday.
118
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,934
- Huh?
- Sergeant Carter, I just want you to know
119
00:05:50,934 --> 00:05:53,186
that I think the punishment
you gave me was unfair.
120
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:56,106
You had no right to talk to me
the way you did, no right whatsoever.
121
00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:57,941
- Pyle...
- I resented it, Sergeant.
122
00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:00,527
You talked to me like
I was still wet behind the ears.
123
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:01,945
Well, let me just tell you one thing.
124
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:04,906
A man's got a right to make a mistake
now and then. Any man.
125
00:06:04,906 --> 00:06:06,491
- Pyle...
- I mean it, Sergeant.
126
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:09,327
Don't try to make up with me now.
You pushed me too far yesterday,
127
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:10,787
- and you know it.
- If you think...
128
00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:13,874
I don't want to hear it, Sergeant.
I've heard all I want to hear from you.
129
00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:17,002
You just remember one thing.
I'm a human being with human feelings.
130
00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:19,921
You just remember that, Sergeant.
Remember that. You got it?
131
00:06:24,009 --> 00:06:25,552
Did you hear that?
132
00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:27,220
Did you hear that?
133
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,805
- Yeah.
- I'll kill him!
134
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:31,725
I'll shove a dishonorable discharge
down his throat so fast...
135
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,184
- Sarge, wait, listen.
- What for?
136
00:06:33,184 --> 00:06:34,936
- You heard him, didn't you?
- I know, I know.
137
00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:36,229
- But did you see his face?
- Yeah.
138
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:39,274
- And for the last time too.
- No, no, he had a kind of a glazed look.
139
00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:42,652
So what? He always has a glazed look.
He was born with a glazed look. Come on!
140
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:45,238
- We're gonna settle his hash right now!
- Sarge, wait a minute.
141
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,157
I tell you,
there was something funny about Pyle.
142
00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:48,658
- Not to me.
- Sarge, will you listen?
143
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,076
He was asleep, sound asleep.
144
00:06:50,869 --> 00:06:52,120
- Huh?
- So help me, Sarge.
145
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,663
He was either asleep or out of his mind.
146
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:56,291
I'll give you that one.
That one I'll give you.
147
00:06:56,291 --> 00:06:58,376
- He's out of his skull all right.
- Okay, go ahead.
148
00:06:58,376 --> 00:06:59,628
I bet he's back in his bunk right now.
149
00:07:16,353 --> 00:07:17,729
[whispers] See?
150
00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,690
How do you know
he's not putting one over on us?
151
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,652
Okay, Pyle, the joke's over.
152
00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:26,821
Okay, Pyle, enough is enough.
153
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:30,200
Oh, hey, Sergeant.
154
00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:32,827
Yeah, Pyle, it's me, in the flesh.
155
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:35,080
It seems we have
a little difference of opinion
156
00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:37,457
about my methods
of running the platoon, don't it?
157
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:38,541
Huh?
158
00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:42,253
It seems you don't like the way I handled
things out on the infiltration course.
159
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,839
It seems I'm picking on you too much.
160
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,175
Well...
161
00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:49,636
where in the world
did you get an idea like that?
162
00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:52,472
Pyle, just tell me one thing.
What time did you hit the sack?
163
00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:55,892
About 9:30, 9:35.
164
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,644
Been sleeping like a top ever since.
165
00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,312
You didn't leave your bunk?
166
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:00,730
Well, no, Sergeant.
167
00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:03,942
You didn't leave your barracks?
Is that what you're saying?
168
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,153
No, Sergeant, I'm positive.
Where would I go?
169
00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:09,155
You've been asleep?
170
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:11,449
You've really been asleep all this time?
171
00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:14,285
Well, absolutely. Why, what's wrong?
172
00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:16,454
Huh...
173
00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:19,916
Nothing.
Forget about it, go back to sleep.
174
00:08:31,302 --> 00:08:32,637
I don't get it.
175
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,180
- You know what I think?
- Huh?
176
00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:36,683
I think we got a sleepwalker on our hands.
177
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:39,352
- A sleepwalker?
- Well, what else?
178
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,896
Pyle storms in at 1 :00 in the morning,
tells you off,
179
00:08:41,896 --> 00:08:45,316
walks out again, and then we find him
sound asleep like nothing ever happened.
180
00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:48,445
Yeah. He really looked like
he was asleep, all right.
181
00:08:48,445 --> 00:08:51,573
Right. A case of somnambulism
if ever I heard of one.
182
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:53,366
That too?
183
00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:02,917
Hey, ma'am.
184
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,254
Don't tell me you're back for more.
185
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:09,090
Yes, ma'am, one order
of Welsh rarebit, please.
186
00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:11,885
I take it no bad dreams last night?
187
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,804
No, ma'am.
Matter of fact, I never slept better.
188
00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:18,767
Well, good. By the way, will you
be wanting more than one portion tonight?
189
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:22,270
Oh, I know I'm gonna want more,
but I don't think I'm gonna have time.
190
00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,314
You see, we're going out on night bivouac
191
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:27,108
and the sergeant warned me
I better not be late, or else.
192
00:09:27,108 --> 00:09:29,527
- Right.
- But I'll make up for it tomorrow night.
193
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:33,448
- You can be sure of that.
- A Welsh rarebit fiend.
194
00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,241
Gluttony, gluttony, gluttony.
195
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,247
[insects chirp]
196
00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:44,626
You say Pyle checked in on time?
197
00:09:44,626 --> 00:09:46,086
Ten minutes early, to be exact.
198
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,963
Well, thank goodness
for little things, eh?
199
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,465
What do you say we call it a night?
200
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,884
Well, everything looks like
in good shape to me, Sarge.
201
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:54,594
[Gomer] Vince!
202
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,056
It's me, Pyle. I want to talk to you.
203
00:09:58,056 --> 00:09:59,933
- Vince?
- You just listen to me, Sergeant.
204
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:03,394
You're always complaining I'm never
on time. Well, let me ask you something.
205
00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:04,938
- Huh?
- Have I ever been late, Sergeant,
206
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:08,441
ever in my whole life? Huh, huh?
Come on, speak up. Cat got your tongue?
207
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:09,984
Look... I'll tell you, Sergeant.
208
00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,111
No! N-O!
209
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,029
I've never been late for anything,
and you know it,
210
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,198
so if you got any ideas
about fussing at me,
211
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:18,576
just forget about it. You got that? Just
forget about it. That's all I got to say!
212
00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:22,247
Did you hear that?
213
00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:23,832
Huh? Did you hear that?
214
00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:26,042
- Sarge, where you going?
- Where am I going?
215
00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,336
I'm gonna throw that meathead
in the brig so fast...
216
00:10:28,336 --> 00:10:30,797
Wait, Sarge! It's the same as last time.
He's asleep again.
217
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:33,091
- His eyes are wide open!
- Right, just like last time.
218
00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:36,553
That's what they say about sleepwalkers.
They do everything with their eyes open,
219
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:38,638
- only they don't know it.
- But I know it!
220
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,682
Right. There's very little
you can do about it.
221
00:10:40,682 --> 00:10:43,393
Then I'm going to find somebody
who can do something about it!
222
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:47,480
You say you've never noticed
this behavior before?
223
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,483
No, sir. He's always slept like a log.
224
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:51,860
As a matter of fact,
225
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:54,529
it usually takes a 21-gun salute
to wake him up.
226
00:10:54,529 --> 00:10:55,572
I see.
227
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:58,741
You don't think
it's anything serious, do you, sir?
228
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:00,243
No, it's not likely.
229
00:11:00,243 --> 00:11:03,997
Occasional sleepwalking when there's
no prior history to such behavior
230
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:07,083
is usually due to some temporary stimulus.
231
00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:08,126
Sir?
232
00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:12,297
Well, sometimes the body's chemical
equilibrium can be thrown off balance
233
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:15,175
by a reaction to some specific
type of food or drink.
234
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:18,887
Do you know anything about his off-base
habits lately? Where he's been going?
235
00:11:18,887 --> 00:11:22,390
Uh... no, sir, not really.
I mean, he don't talk about 'em.
236
00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,142
I'd look into it, Sergeant,
237
00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:26,644
especially since it could
affect his future in the Corps.
238
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:27,770
Sir?
239
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,355
If there's no improvement
in his condition,
240
00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:31,816
we may have no alternative
but to discharge him.
241
00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:33,943
- Discharge him?
- That's right.
242
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:36,487
You know, a sleepwalker
can be a hazard in a combat unit.
243
00:11:36,487 --> 00:11:40,116
Why, he could jeopardize the safety
of every single man in his outfit.
244
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,534
Isn't that so?
245
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,244
Oh, yeah, that's true, sir,
246
00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,873
and if there's one thing a combat outfit
don't need, it's jeopardizing.
247
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,585
That's why I say keep an eye on him,
for everybody's sake.
248
00:11:50,585 --> 00:11:52,086
Oh, I will, sir, I will.
249
00:11:52,962 --> 00:11:56,049
Sleepwalkers have to be discharged, huh?
250
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:57,342
I would say so.
251
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:04,224
- Hey, Sergeant.
- Goodbye, Pyle.
252
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,768
- What was that, Sergeant?
- Huh? What was what?
253
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:08,811
You said goodbye.
254
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:10,146
Oh.
255
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:12,190
Well, I was just thinking, Pyle.
256
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:14,734
Just thinking.
257
00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:23,368
That's what I thought.
Just what the doc said.
258
00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:26,663
Pyle's sleepwalking
is probably caused by something he ate.
259
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:27,956
It's just a temporary thing.
260
00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:29,332
Yeah, right.
261
00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:32,710
So all you got to do is find out
exactly what it is he's been eating.
262
00:12:32,710 --> 00:12:33,753
Uh-uh.
263
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:36,172
- Huh? What do you mean?
- Uh-uh.
264
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:38,007
That's what I mean. Uh-uh.
265
00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:41,344
You mean you don't intend to investigate
Pyle's sleepwalking?
266
00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:43,054
What for? What's to investigate?
267
00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:46,099
Come on, Sarge, you can't have him
bounced out of the Corps
268
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,600
just because of something he ate.
269
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:51,479
Look, I can't have a sleepwalker
in my outfit.
270
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:54,399
When the doc says it ain't safe,
that's it.
271
00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:55,984
It ain't my decision anymore.
272
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:58,861
Right, but according to the doc,
maybe you could just snap him out of it
273
00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:00,947
if you find out
what it is that doesn't agree with him.
274
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:03,616
So, what if I do find out?
275
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,910
I got to think of the platoon's jeopardy.
276
00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:07,370
The platoon's what?
277
00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:09,998
Jeopardy. Jeopardy.
278
00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:13,209
That's a medical term for what's going
to happen to the platoon out in the field
279
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:14,919
if Pyle starts to sleepwalk.
280
00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:17,380
Come on, Sarge, aren't you
taking an awful to for granted?
281
00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:19,799
For all we know,
it may be too many strawberry sodas.
282
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,509
Well, that's his problem.
283
00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:24,554
But, Sarge, you've got to investigate.
284
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,766
You're not the type of guy to toss
a fellow Marine aside like an old shoe.
285
00:13:28,766 --> 00:13:32,145
I think you owe it to a guy
who's been in the outfit as long as Pyle.
286
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,106
What do I owe him? I owe the platoon more.
287
00:13:35,106 --> 00:13:37,317
If he's going to be
a threat to the platoon,
288
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,110
then there's only one thing to do.
289
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:42,196
Get rid of him, like the doctor said.
290
00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:45,283
But the doctor also said
it could just be temporary
291
00:13:45,283 --> 00:13:47,618
and maybe you could find out
the reason for it.
292
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:50,997
But I guess you can use that
as your excuse for getting rid of Pyle,
293
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:53,624
which is really
what you want to do, right?
294
00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:56,502
- Look, Boyle...
- Excuse me, Sergeant.
295
00:13:57,295 --> 00:14:00,131
Oh, Pyle. What do you want?
296
00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:03,885
Well, I just came by to pick up my pass
for tonight, if that's all right with you.
297
00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:05,678
Oh?
298
00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:08,765
Well, uh...
299
00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,100
All right, Pyle.
300
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:14,854
There you are.
301
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,814
Thank you, Sergeant. Thank you kindly.
302
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,401
- Pyle.
- Yes, Sergeant?
303
00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:25,031
You know, Pyle,
I've been meaning to ask you...
304
00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:26,783
what have you been up to lately?
305
00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:29,869
All of a sudden,
you're running into town every night.
306
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,121
Well... nothing much.
307
00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:36,501
Just the usual movie
and strawberry soda, huh?
308
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:38,920
Well... not exactly.
309
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:41,130
You mean you've given up
on the milk shakes?
310
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:45,426
No, Sergeant,
I still like them as much as I ever did.
311
00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:46,511
Uh-huh.
312
00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,304
Well, good night.
313
00:14:48,971 --> 00:14:51,224
Boy, you sure seem to be in hurry.
314
00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:53,393
Like you got something special going on.
315
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,811
Oh, no, Sergeant.
316
00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:57,313
It's just that I didn't want
to miss my bus.
317
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:58,856
Well, good night.
318
00:14:58,856 --> 00:15:01,192
Pyle, you still haven't told me
where you're going.
319
00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:04,112
Well, it... it's a new place, Sergeant.
320
00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:06,697
You mean for dinner, that kind of thing?
321
00:15:06,697 --> 00:15:08,449
Yes, sir, that's it.
322
00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:10,159
Well, good night.
323
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:13,579
Oh, well, don't let me hold you up.
324
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:16,165
You run along before you miss your bus.
325
00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:18,501
Well, good night, Sergeant Carter,
Corporal Boyle.
326
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:19,836
Y'all have a nice evening.
327
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,214
A new restaurant, huh?
328
00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,174
You know, the doc said it.
329
00:15:25,174 --> 00:15:29,137
He's reacting to some temporary stimulus.
330
00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:32,306
That must be some pretty good
temporary stimulus,
331
00:15:32,306 --> 00:15:33,891
if you know what I mean.
332
00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:38,020
Come on, let's find out what it is
before he gets arrested.
333
00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:42,900
Do you know what I think, Boyle?
334
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:45,611
- It looks like a front to me.
- A front? For what?
335
00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:47,989
Who knows. It could be a lot of things.
336
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,657
And just how do you figure that?
337
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:52,410
The smile... the smile on Pyle's kisser.
338
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:55,455
Strawberry sodas don't put you
in seventh heaven like that.
339
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:57,790
Come on, Sarge! Pyle, sweet innocent Pyle?
340
00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:01,544
Look, I only know one thing.
Sweet innocent Pyle has been yelling at me
341
00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:03,004
for two nights in a row.
342
00:16:03,004 --> 00:16:06,174
And that kind of courage you don't get
from sniffing ketchup bottles.
343
00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:07,967
- Hey, he's paying the check.
- Huh?
344
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:13,764
- See you again tomorrow night?
- Yes, ma'am.
345
00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,975
'Cause it usually takes me a good week
346
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:19,687
to eat myself out of a taste for something
I like as much as Welsh rarebit.
347
00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:22,023
Good. See you then.
348
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:25,234
- Ain't you gonna say what you usually say?
- What's that?
349
00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:26,611
Oh!
350
00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:28,863
Pleasant dreams.
351
00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:30,948
Thank you, ma'am, thank you.
352
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:44,629
I don't know, Sarge.
Pyle sure looks okay to me.
353
00:16:44,629 --> 00:16:46,839
- Sure he does.
- And that dame serving him,
354
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:49,300
- she looked okay, too.
- Sure she does.
355
00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:52,720
- You mean, you suspect her?
- What are you, a babe in the woods?
356
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,305
- Don't you read the papers?
- What?
357
00:16:54,305 --> 00:16:56,432
She looks like a nice old lady
who runs a tea room.
358
00:16:56,432 --> 00:17:00,061
Uh-huh, and you never heard
of nice little old ladies
359
00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,562
who hold up banks?
360
00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:04,023
Nice little old ladies
who commit murder, huh?
361
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,400
- That nice little old lady?
- I don't know.
362
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,444
I can tell you better if I see her cellar.
363
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:11,864
- You really think this joint is a front?
- What else?
364
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:15,368
Whatever he's getting here
don't take effect until around bedtime.
365
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:18,454
Come on, now's the time to find out
what it is he's taking.
366
00:17:36,097 --> 00:17:38,975
Oh! Oh, come in, boys.
367
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:42,228
Sit down, make yourselves comfortable.
368
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:46,566
- Thank you.
- Would you boys like to see a menu?
369
00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:47,858
No, thanks.
370
00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:51,320
Why don't you just bring us the usual?
371
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,573
The usual?
372
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:56,117
You know, what that Marine had.
373
00:17:56,117 --> 00:17:57,910
You know, the Marine that was in here.
374
00:17:57,910 --> 00:18:00,121
Oh, you, too?
375
00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:01,789
Yeah, me, too.
376
00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:04,834
Well, so you're another one.
377
00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:07,003
Yeah. [chuckles]
378
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:08,421
I'm another one all right.
379
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:12,258
Do you think you can handle it as well
as that other Marine?
380
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:14,218
Oh, yeah, sure.
381
00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:17,221
- Even better.
- You, too?
382
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:19,599
Hmm? Oh, no, nothing for me.
Thank you, ma'am.
383
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:21,726
You know, I was wondering...
384
00:18:22,977 --> 00:18:24,395
...where do you serve it?
385
00:18:24,395 --> 00:18:27,189
- Where do you want it?
- Where does the Marine have it?
386
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,691
Right here.
387
00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:30,151
That's where I'll have it.
388
00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:35,406
Huh? What do you think it is?
389
00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:37,199
I don't know.
390
00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:41,120
But I figure it's got to be something
you eat, drink or smoke.
391
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,998
But if it's what you think it is,
what are you going to do?
392
00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:46,250
- She's coming right back with some.
- Right.
393
00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:49,337
So all I got to do
is wait until she turns her back,
394
00:18:49,337 --> 00:18:51,380
then slip a sample into my pocket
395
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,633
and rush it over to the doctor
to have it analyzed.
396
00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:55,468
Hey, I never thought of that.
397
00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:57,178
[sniffs]
398
00:19:04,268 --> 00:19:08,272
- What's that?
- That's what you ordered. Welsh rarebit.
399
00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:14,195
[chuckles]
400
00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:15,905
[laughing]
401
00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,866
- What's so funny?
- So that's it.
402
00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:21,118
- So that's what?
- That's what's giving Pyle nightmares.
403
00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:23,079
Haven't you heard the old story
about Welsh rarebit?
404
00:19:23,079 --> 00:19:24,872
- Huh?
- Well, yeah, it's supposed to make you
405
00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:26,707
dream like crazy. Didn't you know?
406
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:30,336
Oh, come on, Boyle, you don't expect me
to believe that, do you?
407
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:32,505
This is the 20th century, remember?
408
00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:34,507
Look, all I know is,
I've been hearing it for years
409
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,175
and it looks like Pyle's proving it true.
410
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:38,469
You've been fighting pretty hard
for Pyle lately.
411
00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:40,680
You've been leaning over backwards
trying to defend him
412
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,724
- like he was a relative or something.
- I'm just trying to be fair, that's all.
413
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:48,062
Look, the fact remains,
Pyle has turned into a sleepwalker.
414
00:19:48,062 --> 00:19:50,690
And if you think
this stuff is all it took, you're crazy.
415
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,024
And I'll prove it to you.
416
00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:55,486
I'll prove it to you just to show you
that I'm as fair as they come.
417
00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:58,280
Watch, Boyle.
I'm going to eat some of this stuff
418
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:01,575
just to show you
that we know only two facts for certain.
419
00:20:01,575 --> 00:20:04,745
One, Pyle is a bona fide sleepwalker,
420
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:07,832
and two, this is a plate of Welsh rarebit.
421
00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:13,087
And three... it's very hot! Boy!
422
00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:19,051
[ticking]
423
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,353
[muttering]
424
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,356
[muttering]
425
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:36,110
[muttering continues]
426
00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:13,230
Hey, Gomer.
427
00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:15,649
We're gonna settle this thing
here and now.
428
00:21:15,649 --> 00:21:17,610
- Here and now.
- Sure, sure.
429
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:20,529
You say what you have to say
and I'll just wait till you're finished.
430
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:21,947
Darn right you'll wait till I finish.
431
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:24,867
It's time I straightened you out
about the way you been treating me.
432
00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:27,703
I know, and I'm sorry about that.
433
00:21:27,703 --> 00:21:29,622
You said
you was gonna wait till I finished.
434
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:30,956
I know, but I just thought...
435
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:31,999
Knock it off!
436
00:21:32,750 --> 00:21:35,127
I'm gonna tell you something
right here and now.
437
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:38,005
You better start
having a little more confidence in me,
438
00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:40,591
because I've had it
with your suspicions and mistrust.
439
00:21:40,591 --> 00:21:43,093
- Do you read me?
- Well, yes, I do.
440
00:21:43,093 --> 00:21:45,095
What was that, Sergeant? What did you say?
441
00:21:45,095 --> 00:21:48,182
- I said, yes, I do.
- I can't hear you!
442
00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:51,143
Let's hear it, Carter!
You just gonna stand there?
443
00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:52,478
Well, no, Pyle.
444
00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:56,232
I just want to say
I really appreciate your criticism.
445
00:21:56,232 --> 00:21:58,192
- Carter...
- It isn't every private
446
00:21:58,192 --> 00:21:59,527
that would go to all that trouble,
447
00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:03,072
and I just want to say,
thank you, thank you, thank you.
448
00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:05,783
Now you've said it,
so head on back to the duty hut.
449
00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:07,952
Go on, move it, move it, move it!
450
00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:09,495
Hey, Sarge, Pyle!
451
00:22:11,121 --> 00:22:12,873
Hey, wake up, Sarge.
452
00:22:12,873 --> 00:22:15,501
- Boyle... you?
- Yeah, me.
453
00:22:15,501 --> 00:22:18,754
- It's 3:00 in the morning. Look at you.
- Hey, Corporal Boyle.
454
00:22:18,754 --> 00:22:21,257
- What is this? What's going on here?
- You don't know?
455
00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:23,634
What am I doing out here?
How did I get out here?
456
00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:27,304
I'll tell you what got you out here,
a plate of Welsh rarebit, that's what.
457
00:22:27,304 --> 00:22:28,973
- Huh?
- Yeah, and you too, Pyle.
458
00:22:28,973 --> 00:22:32,017
Boy, that Welsh rarebit
was working great tonight, I can see that.
459
00:22:32,017 --> 00:22:33,727
- What?
- Yeah, you two guys
460
00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:37,147
were doing a little sleepwalking
and dreaming dreams you'd never believe.
461
00:22:37,147 --> 00:22:39,316
You mean it's true
about the Welsh rarebit?
462
00:22:39,316 --> 00:22:40,568
It's really true?
463
00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:43,529
Sergeant, you mean you had
a plate of that Welsh rarebit?
464
00:22:43,529 --> 00:22:45,531
I never did believe that story either.
465
00:22:45,531 --> 00:22:47,700
But I guess it's true,
on account of look at us.
466
00:22:48,701 --> 00:22:52,079
Well, how about that!
I never would have believed it.
467
00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:54,665
Pyle, you get back to your quarters
this minute, you hear me?
468
00:22:54,665 --> 00:22:55,916
- But, Sergeant...
- Knock it off!
469
00:22:55,916 --> 00:22:58,544
If you think I'm gonna stand out here
in the middle of the night
470
00:22:58,544 --> 00:23:00,671
listening to you jabber away,
you're crazy. Now move!
471
00:23:00,671 --> 00:23:02,047
- But, Sergeant...
- Come on, let's go!
472
00:23:02,047 --> 00:23:03,674
Move, move, move, move, move! Move it!
473
00:23:03,674 --> 00:23:05,217
That's more like it.
474
00:23:05,217 --> 00:23:06,969
[Carter] Move it! Move, move, move!
475
00:23:10,347 --> 00:23:12,349
[bugle playing reveille]
476
00:23:17,563 --> 00:23:20,316
[Carter's voice] All right,
you knuckleheads! You heard that bugle!
477
00:23:20,316 --> 00:23:23,235
Get out of those sacks
and fall in on the double!
478
00:23:23,235 --> 00:23:26,322
Let's go! Move it, move it, move it!
479
00:23:26,322 --> 00:23:28,073
Did you hear me? I said move!
480
00:23:28,073 --> 00:23:29,325
[whistle blowing]
481
00:23:29,325 --> 00:23:31,368
Let's go you knuckleheads, on the double!
482
00:23:31,368 --> 00:23:32,828
Go! Go! Go!
483
00:23:36,874 --> 00:23:38,959
Carter, you knucklehead! You lame-brain!
484
00:23:38,959 --> 00:23:41,462
Is that the way you fall out for reveille,
in your underwear?
485
00:23:41,462 --> 00:23:43,505
What are you, stupid?
Well, talk, man, talk!
486
00:23:43,505 --> 00:23:46,133
[Gomer's voice] I'm sorry, sir.
I'm as sorry as I can be.
487
00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:47,885
Sorry? You're sorry?
488
00:23:47,885 --> 00:23:49,637
I'll give you something to be sorry about.
489
00:23:49,637 --> 00:23:51,555
Get some clothes on you
on the double, you hear me?
490
00:23:51,555 --> 00:23:54,892
Right, sir. Right away, Sergeant.
I'll do it as fast as I can.
491
00:23:54,892 --> 00:23:57,061
Well, what are you standing there for
like a dumbbell?
492
00:23:57,061 --> 00:23:59,104
You need some help?
Okay, I'll give you some!
493
00:23:59,104 --> 00:24:02,066
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
494
00:24:02,983 --> 00:24:04,652
- Sarge, you all right?
- Hmm?
495
00:24:04,652 --> 00:24:06,403
Huh? Huh?
496
00:24:06,403 --> 00:24:08,405
I thought you were feeling sick,
so I let you sleep.
497
00:24:08,405 --> 00:24:09,823
But I heard you yell a couple of times.
498
00:24:09,823 --> 00:24:11,408
Are you okay? Are you all right?
499
00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:15,746
Oh, Pyle is here reporting for those
extra duties you said you want him to do.
500
00:24:15,746 --> 00:24:17,665
- Say something.
- Huh?
501
00:24:17,665 --> 00:24:19,875
I want him to talk. Say something.
502
00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:20,918
Say, "Good morning."
503
00:24:22,878 --> 00:24:24,171
[normal voice] Good morning, Sergeant.
504
00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:27,257
Good morning, Pyle.
505
00:24:27,257 --> 00:24:29,134
Sarge, are you all right?
506
00:24:30,219 --> 00:24:32,388
Yeah, I'm okay.
40151
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