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1
00:00:12,979 --> 00:00:15,777
At least Jarod could have led us
to a place near the Strip...
2
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,783
then I could have
hit the craps table.
3
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:21,617
[Clears Throat] Well, hit this instead:
single malt, like you asked for.
4
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:24,452
And you're forgetting something.
Jarod didn't lead us here.
5
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:27,550
His friend told him to stay here
in an e-mail I intercepted.
6
00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:32,394
- He's been compromised this time,
and he's gonna walk right into our hands.
- My hands.
7
00:00:32,465 --> 00:00:37,164
- Now go to your room.
- Oh, this is my room. Our room.
This is the honeymoon suite.
8
00:00:37,237 --> 00:00:40,968
- Not even after four of these.
- Oh, no, no. Miss Parker, it's perfect.
9
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:44,568
Why do you think Sydney and Lyle
are coming tomorrow? If Jarod came here...
10
00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:48,410
and he saw a woman and three men
on the register, well,
he'd-he'd know we're here.
11
00:00:48,481 --> 00:00:50,642
This way, if-
if you and I pretend...
12
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,311
to be the honeymoon couple,
well, he'd be none the wiser.
13
00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:58,748
- This was your idea.
- Yeah.
14
00:00:58,825 --> 00:01:01,817
I mean, it's a good one, isn't it?
Nobody'd believe you and Syd.
15
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:04,261
He's-He's middle-aged,
and he's Flemish.
16
00:01:04,330 --> 00:01:08,528
And you, you're young and-unless you think
that you'd rather room with Lyle.
17
00:01:08,601 --> 00:01:11,092
Centre's a sick place but-
but your own brother?
18
00:01:13,239 --> 00:01:15,605
Relax, Romeo.
That's as far as I go.
19
00:01:15,675 --> 00:01:18,872
Take first watch. Anybody pulls into
that parking lot, send up a flare.
20
00:01:18,945 --> 00:01:21,004
- Okay.
- Broots?
21
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:23,606
Fall asleep,
it'll be a hell of a wedding night.
22
00:01:34,894 --> 00:01:36,885
[No Audible Music]
23
00:01:43,736 --> 00:01:46,728
[Bird Chirping In Distance]
24
00:01:48,308 --> 00:01:50,299
[Sighs]
25
00:01:55,381 --> 00:01:58,612
[Murmurs, Clears Throat]
26
00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:14,933
- [Gasps]
- [Sighs]
27
00:02:15,001 --> 00:02:17,902
[Jarod Narrating]
Welcome to Sin City-Las Vegas, Nevada.
28
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:21,998
A Pretender could win big here-
some other Pretender.
29
00:02:22,075 --> 00:02:24,703
I've been rolling nothing
but snake eyes.
30
00:02:24,777 --> 00:02:29,043
I should be having some fun in the sun,
and all I got is... frostbite.
31
00:02:29,115 --> 00:02:32,414
- They say luck is a lady.
That must be good luck.
- [Shivering]
32
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:36,251
- Bad luck is definitely a man,
and he dresses funny.
- [Teeth Chattering]
33
00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:39,382
Argyle tried to sell me to the Centre
a couple of years back.
34
00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:41,393
Last year he almost got me killed.
35
00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:44,225
- [Sneezes]
- Why should this year be any different?
36
00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:47,266
- [Whimpers]
- Some days it doesn't pay
to answer your e-mail.
37
00:02:48,601 --> 00:02:51,729
[Man Narrating]
There are Pretenders among us.
38
00:02:51,804 --> 00:02:53,738
[Jarod]
I was taken from my family.
39
00:02:53,806 --> 00:02:57,367
Thirty-six hours and he's already demonstrating
more talent than any of our others.
40
00:02:57,443 --> 00:03:00,844
How many people died
because of what I thought up?
41
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:04,350
Since I broke out, I've spent
every moment searching for my past.
42
00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:06,612
[Miss Parker]
He's a Pretender-
43
00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:09,450
A genius who can become
anyone that he wants to be.
44
00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:12,252
- The Centre wants him alive.
- Preferably.
45
00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:15,260
- [Miss Parker] He defends the weak and abused.
- [Jarod] Life's a gift.
46
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,508
- You a doctor?
- I am today.
47
00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:38,845
[Jarod Narrating]
Look at me. Some genius.
48
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:41,682
I wish I could pretend myself
into some longjohns.
49
00:03:41,754 --> 00:03:47,021
But in my own defense, this all started
when Argyle decided to become a Pretender.
50
00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:50,654
As usual, his mouth was writing checks
his brain couldn't cash.
51
00:03:52,699 --> 00:03:54,633
Hello?
52
00:03:56,369 --> 00:03:58,303
Hello?
53
00:04:00,039 --> 00:04:02,633
Ha! Prepare to die,
you mamaluke. Ow! Ooh!
54
00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:05,610
Ah! Hey! Hey!
[Grunts]
55
00:04:05,678 --> 00:04:08,169
- J-Man! You made it.
- Argyle, what are you doing?
56
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:12,776
I'm sorry, J-Dog. You saw the door.
This is a dangerous business.
57
00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:15,954
And when you're the mac daddy
of private dicks...
58
00:04:16,022 --> 00:04:19,458
the flyin' monkeys-all they wanna do is
put you on the night train to Emerald City.
59
00:04:19,525 --> 00:04:23,962
You're lucky you didn't get your ticket
punched, Richard Dixon, private investigator.
60
00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:27,295
- Oh, no. I ain't Dick Dixon. I'm his partner.
- So why did you e-mail me?
61
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:29,335
Why don't you get him to help you?
62
00:04:29,402 --> 00:04:31,962
Oh. Well, you see,
this ain't Double "D's" kind of gig.
63
00:04:32,038 --> 00:04:35,701
This is what we in the industry
call a "multifacetal" type thing.
64
00:04:35,775 --> 00:04:38,676
See, there's a lot of
cross-purposing entities, multicultural...
65
00:04:38,745 --> 00:04:41,043
purposes, you know-
all of that and what not.
66
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:44,447
- Good-bye, Argyle.
- No, no, no! Wait! J-Dog. J-Dog.
You can't leave me.
67
00:04:44,517 --> 00:04:49,511
You can't leave. You're all I got, man.
I'm in trouble, Jarod. Please.
68
00:04:49,589 --> 00:04:53,992
[Jarod Narrating] Raymond Chandler
hada secret for writing detective stories.
69
00:04:54,060 --> 00:04:57,552
"When in doubt," he said,
"have somebody enter the room with a gun."
70
00:04:59,365 --> 00:05:02,493
Okay, it's an ice-cream cone.
But it was pistachio...
71
00:05:02,568 --> 00:05:04,968
and I'm allergic to pistachios.
72
00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:09,566
- You Dick Dixon?
- Me? No. I'm his partner. That's Dick Dixon.
73
00:05:11,411 --> 00:05:15,074
- Oh! Ow!
- Think that hurt? Taste this.
74
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,559
[Jarod Narrating] Let's call
this story "Death by Double Dip."
75
00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:19,915
Now, our pistachio-packing
friend will have to wait...
76
00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:23,114
since the Pretender
is now Dick Dixon, private eye.
77
00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:27,023
Let me give you the skinny. Argyle's new
job was another epic work of fiction.
78
00:05:27,093 --> 00:05:29,755
Dick Dixon isn't even around anymore.
79
00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:32,457
He skipped town last year
buried in debt.
80
00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:35,228
Argyle had only become his partner
a week earlier.
81
00:05:35,301 --> 00:05:38,202
He was working the building
as a "hospitality technician."
82
00:05:38,271 --> 00:05:41,707
And that's what he called it.
I call it "janitor."
83
00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:46,734
He happened to be scrubbing Dick Dixon's
abandoned office when... she walked in.
84
00:05:46,813 --> 00:05:48,747
I'm looking for Dick?
85
00:05:50,783 --> 00:05:52,774
Excuse me?
86
00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:57,417
- You know-Dick.
- Dick?
87
00:05:57,490 --> 00:06:01,722
- Dick Dixon?
- Oh. Oh. Dick Dixon.
88
00:06:01,794 --> 00:06:05,252
Uh, yeah.
Um, no. He's gone.
89
00:06:05,331 --> 00:06:07,526
- Gone?
- Yeah. He took the slow boat to China.
90
00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,591
[Spoken Lyric]
that kind of thing.
91
00:06:09,669 --> 00:06:11,694
- Do you work for him?
- Do I work for him?
92
00:06:11,771 --> 00:06:15,935
- Yeah.
- Do I work for him? I am his nom de plume.
93
00:06:16,008 --> 00:06:19,102
I'm his coup de grace. I am his
comrade-in-arms, you know what I'm sayin'?
94
00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:23,615
- I am his partner, for Pete's sake.
- Um, you do his dirty work?
95
00:06:23,683 --> 00:06:27,050
That's funny.
This mop-you see-I'm undercover.
96
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:30,487
I'm what we in the industry
call the "clandestinal" partner.
97
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:33,320
Whatever Dick wants, Argyle gets Dick.
98
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,123
"Argyle." That's an interesting name.
99
00:06:36,195 --> 00:06:38,891
Yeah. My parents gave it to me
on account of my birthmark.
100
00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:41,832
Hey, would you like to see
my birthmark?
101
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:45,064
- No.
- Oh, no. I'm sorry. I-
102
00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:48,574
- [Sobs]
- I get that a lot. Please don't cry.
I hate to see a girl cry.
103
00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:53,169
Here. Take this. There you go.
That's all right.
104
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,612
- Say, what's your name?
- Mona.
105
00:06:55,681 --> 00:06:58,616
- Like the Lisa?
- Yeah.
106
00:06:58,684 --> 00:07:01,653
- That's very beautiful.
- [Blows Nose Loudly]
107
00:07:02,889 --> 00:07:06,347
Listen, Mona. I can help.
Talk to me.
108
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:12,959
Well, I'm a showgirl
down at the Club Ali Bar...
109
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:16,001
and my boss is in trouble.
110
00:07:16,068 --> 00:07:18,696
Trouble?
What's your boss's name?
111
00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:20,830
- Dirty Willy.
- He doesn't bathe?
112
00:07:20,907 --> 00:07:23,671
No. People just call him that.
113
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:29,147
He's a good man, takes care of us, and
all the girls have comprehensive dental.
114
00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:34,881
- Wow. That's key.
- And this bucket of quarters
is all he's got left.
115
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:40,483
And he told me to give this
to Mr. Dixon.
116
00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:42,824
Okay.
117
00:07:42,895 --> 00:07:46,991
I will get this to Mr. Dixon.
118
00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:51,025
- Willy knows things, Mr. Argyle-
- Oh, yeah?
119
00:07:51,103 --> 00:07:53,003
Things that he shouldn't know.
120
00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:57,702
- He needs protection.
- Consider it done, Ms. Lisa.
121
00:07:57,777 --> 00:08:01,076
- Argyle is on the case.
- [Giggles]
122
00:08:02,281 --> 00:08:04,977
[Jarod Narrating]
"Argyle is on the case"-
123
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:08,282
five words to send
a chill down your spine.
124
00:08:08,354 --> 00:08:11,812
Argyle embraced the cliche,
casting himself in the starring role...
125
00:08:11,891 --> 00:08:15,054
of a big-time private eye extraordinaire.
126
00:08:15,127 --> 00:08:19,257
Determined to help Mona, he made
his way back into the Club Ali Bar...
127
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,732
and, like a true detective,
was looking for clues-
128
00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:25,760
anything he could find that would lead him
to where or what happened to Dirty Willy.
129
00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:28,306
But he wasn't ready to be a star.
130
00:08:28,374 --> 00:08:33,277
As soon as things got real,
Argyle wished he'd taken a bit part.
131
00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:38,607
[Argyle Gasps]
Dirty Willy.
132
00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:42,552
He'd done the job, solved the case.
He had the killer cornered.
133
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:45,022
- So Argyle did what Argyle does best.
- [Gasps]
134
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:48,857
- He never saw the hit man.
Who could at that speed?
- Woah!
135
00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:53,797
He was pretty sure the killer
didn't see him-pretty sure.
136
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:57,029
Which brings us back
to our pistachio-packin 'porker.
137
00:08:57,103 --> 00:08:59,037
He was wondering
the same thing as me.
138
00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:01,266
- Where the hell is Mona?
- Well, I -I -I don't know.
139
00:09:01,340 --> 00:09:04,605
She told me she was comin'
to see you, Dixon. And now she's gone?
140
00:09:04,677 --> 00:09:07,305
- Did she say where she was goin'?
- She hasn't told me anything.
141
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:11,043
- Did she leave anything?
- Look. Normally, I don't talk
to gun-wielding thugs.
142
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:16,077
Yeah. Your mama must be real proud
of you now, eh, big boy?
143
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:20,725
No. She'd probably give me a lickin'.
144
00:09:22,028 --> 00:09:24,394
My mama's dead.
145
00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:31,125
Truth is, I'm not a thug.
My name is Mike. I'm Mona's brother.
146
00:09:31,203 --> 00:09:34,502
- Oh. Hi, Mike.
- Hi.
147
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:38,340
[Sighs] It just ain't like her not to check in.
Our parents died when we were real little...
148
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,572
and I made a promise to Mom
that I'd take care of Mona.
149
00:09:40,646 --> 00:09:45,015
- I just gotta know if she's okay.
- [Sighs]
150
00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:49,282
You will. Just as soon as we find out
anything, you'll be the first to know.
151
00:09:49,355 --> 00:09:53,018
- I promise. Right, partner?
- Yeah.
152
00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:56,653
Dick Dixon is on the case,
kickin' tail and takin' names.
153
00:09:56,729 --> 00:10:01,393
You are Mr. Positivi-tivity,
the Shah of "I Can." Hey, now. Swell ride.
154
00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:04,265
Like I always say,
private dick's gotta have a ragtop.
155
00:10:04,337 --> 00:10:06,703
- You are not going.
- What are you talkin' about?
156
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:10,218
I am not a detective. You are not my partner.
If I'm going to help, you stay outta my way.
157
00:10:10,242 --> 00:10:13,109
That was extremely hostile.
158
00:10:13,179 --> 00:10:16,012
I can't keep saving your life
if you keep lying yourself into a corner.
159
00:10:16,082 --> 00:10:18,573
- You have to think.
- [Engine Starts]
- Hey!
160
00:10:18,651 --> 00:10:20,585
- [Engine Stops]
- I've been thinkin'.
161
00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:23,520
I was-
[Spoken Lyric] till I met you.
162
00:10:23,589 --> 00:10:28,526
Now after you helped me and Pop last year,
I'm mendin' my wicked ways, you know.
163
00:10:28,594 --> 00:10:31,290
I ain't had nothin'
but honest jobs since.
164
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:36,563
Only thing missin' is the love of my life.
And I met her last week.
165
00:10:43,743 --> 00:10:48,203
- Mona's the one.
- You spent six minutes with her.
166
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:53,741
360 glorious seconds, J-Man. Somethin'
happened between us, I'm tellin' ya.
167
00:10:53,819 --> 00:10:57,186
It was like "electronical" chemicals
or something.
168
00:10:57,256 --> 00:10:59,190
Pheromones, baby,
I'm tellin' ya.
169
00:10:59,258 --> 00:11:02,318
And now my future brother-in-law's
weepin' in his pistachio.
170
00:11:02,395 --> 00:11:05,364
You gotta let me come with you, J-ster.
You gotta let me help her.
171
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:08,195
J-Man. J-Dog.
Please, I'm beggin' ya.
172
00:11:08,267 --> 00:11:10,292
Please, please, please,
please, please.
173
00:11:10,369 --> 00:11:14,169
There are certain times in life when you need
to think with your heart, not your head.
174
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:19,371
This wasn't one of those times, but I thought
it was, so I made the following mistake.
175
00:11:19,445 --> 00:11:22,937
- Please?
- Get in.
176
00:11:23,015 --> 00:11:25,848
Yeah, yeah.
177
00:11:25,918 --> 00:11:29,046
- [Engine Starts]
- Argyle is on the case. Come on!
178
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:37,920
How did I get in this nightmare?
179
00:11:37,997 --> 00:11:41,398
Well, I-I remember
I was watching out for Jarod...
180
00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:45,961
and you looked at me with bedroom eyes,
like you wanted to do the late-night creep.
181
00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:49,405
I did not. We did not.
182
00:11:49,475 --> 00:11:52,035
Well, how can you be sure,
Miss Parker?
183
00:11:52,111 --> 00:11:54,841
For starters, pigs aren't flying,
hell hasn't frozen over...
184
00:11:54,914 --> 00:11:57,712
and you're not the last man on earth.
185
00:11:57,783 --> 00:12:01,150
[Rings]
186
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:03,745
- What?
- How's the stakeout going?
187
00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:06,053
Sydney, how are you?
188
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,661
I... am fine.
189
00:12:10,796 --> 00:12:12,957
Sweeper team says you haven't reported in.
190
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:15,125
Huh. Something came up.
191
00:12:15,201 --> 00:12:19,900
I... overslept, but-
but I was just getting dressed.
192
00:12:19,972 --> 00:12:22,805
I'll be there tomorrow
with Lyle and Raines.
193
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:25,639
Parker, is everything all right?
194
00:12:25,711 --> 00:12:28,578
I am rolling nothing but sevens.
[Chuckles]
195
00:12:38,657 --> 00:12:42,753
[Quietly]
You so much as hint at this
when they arrive...
196
00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:46,286
I will amputate your head.
197
00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:50,301
- Well, what about this?
- There is no "this."
198
00:12:50,369 --> 00:12:52,667
Nothing happened, Broots.
199
00:12:52,738 --> 00:12:57,471
Like I said, it was a nightmare,
and I'm glad I woke up.
200
00:12:57,543 --> 00:13:00,706
When you say things like that,
do you even consider my feelings?
201
00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:05,780
What is it about me
that you find so repulsive?
202
00:13:07,853 --> 00:13:10,822
- You really want to know?
- Yes. I really want to know.
203
00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:13,017
Okay.
204
00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:16,357
Now you shut up and listen.
205
00:13:17,563 --> 00:13:22,432
What I find so utterly uninspiring
about you...
206
00:13:22,501 --> 00:13:25,561
is your idea of risk
is to go without deodorant.
207
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:30,701
When the bullets stop flying, you're
always the one shaking in the corner.
208
00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:35,873
That, in the game of life,
is second string.
209
00:13:35,948 --> 00:13:39,645
And-[Spoken Lyric]
210
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:44,815
Hey. Stop, and let me tell
you something, and you-
211
00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:47,688
you shut up and listen.
212
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:50,593
You're right.
213
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:54,224
I have never taken a risk.
214
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:57,531
Because the whole time I've known you,
I've only wanted to take just one.
215
00:13:57,603 --> 00:14:00,231
Which one would that be?
216
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,833
You're in your office.
217
00:14:06,712 --> 00:14:09,704
It's late, and I sneak in.
218
00:14:09,782 --> 00:14:14,742
In one hand I have gardenias, and in the
other I have a bottle of single malt-
219
00:14:14,820 --> 00:14:18,017
two of your favorite things
in the world.
220
00:14:18,090 --> 00:14:22,550
And I find that little spot
on the nape of your neck...
221
00:14:22,628 --> 00:14:25,529
and I just...
rub it the right way...
222
00:14:25,598 --> 00:14:30,558
to get rid of that migraine you always get
about 6:20 every night-
223
00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:33,537
the one you never tell
anyone about.
224
00:14:35,341 --> 00:14:39,801
The truth is, if I had just one shot...
225
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,813
you know what I'd do?
226
00:14:43,682 --> 00:14:47,209
I would take your pain away.
227
00:14:50,322 --> 00:14:53,052
Truth is, you'd be lucky
to get a scrub like me.
228
00:14:59,598 --> 00:15:03,233
- Do you hear that, Broots?
- What?
229
00:15:10,139 --> 00:15:12,903
Pigs are flying.
230
00:15:12,976 --> 00:15:16,139
♪ [Man Singing Slow Jazz]
231
00:15:21,718 --> 00:15:25,620
[Both Moaning]
232
00:15:25,688 --> 00:15:26,888
[Miss Parker Squeals, Giggles]
233
00:15:27,223 --> 00:15:28,747
[Jarod Narrating] Life is strange.
234
00:15:28,825 --> 00:15:33,091
One hour in the Nevada sun,
and I had more unanswered questions
than the Warren Commission.
235
00:15:33,162 --> 00:15:35,528
- ♪ [Continues]
- There was Dirty Willy's murder to solve...
236
00:15:35,598 --> 00:15:38,089
and Mona, the missing showgirl,
to track down.
237
00:15:38,167 --> 00:15:40,499
But Argyle had to see his father, Benny.
238
00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:45,906
The old man used to be obsessed with the
pope. I was about to find out he converted.
239
00:15:45,975 --> 00:15:48,569
Wayne Newton is more than a holy man.
240
00:15:48,645 --> 00:15:52,479
He is the shaman of the Strip.
He's the duke of downtown.
241
00:15:52,548 --> 00:15:55,847
- Wayne Newton is Las Vegas.
- If you say so.
242
00:15:55,918 --> 00:15:58,079
You know, I met him once, sort of?
243
00:15:58,154 --> 00:16:01,783
My Adella and I, uh,
saw him in Vegas long ago.
244
00:16:01,858 --> 00:16:06,158
Who'd have thought
I'd be back here in Vegas with Argyle...
245
00:16:06,229 --> 00:16:08,823
livin' in this exquisite golfvilla?
246
00:16:08,898 --> 00:16:12,231
[Man, In Distance]
Fore!
247
00:16:12,302 --> 00:16:14,395
- Driving range is open.
- [Man] Sorry.
248
00:16:14,470 --> 00:16:19,237
Yeah.
The only one missin' is my Adella.
249
00:16:19,309 --> 00:16:22,210
This week would've been
our 50th anniversary.
250
00:16:22,278 --> 00:16:26,840
She was my inspiration, Jarod.
She's the reason I'm writin'
a song for Wayne.
251
00:16:26,916 --> 00:16:29,544
- Hey, Pop, we-we don't have time for that.
- Oh, sure we do.
252
00:16:29,619 --> 00:16:31,678
The big "W," he changed our lives...
253
00:16:31,754 --> 00:16:35,315
so my Adella suggested
that I should write him a song...
254
00:16:35,391 --> 00:16:38,383
sort of a companion piece
to "Danke Schoen."
255
00:16:38,461 --> 00:16:41,760
She said,
"Call it 'AufWiedersehen" '...
256
00:16:41,831 --> 00:16:44,994
and here goes nothing.
257
00:16:45,068 --> 00:16:48,504
♪ [Introduction]
258
00:16:48,571 --> 00:16:50,505
♪ [Ends]
259
00:16:53,276 --> 00:16:56,677
- Where's the song?
- It's still a work in progress.
It'll be ready by tomorrow.
260
00:16:56,746 --> 00:17:00,614
- What's happening tomorrow?
- Uh, Wayne is playin'
in a charity tournament...
261
00:17:00,683 --> 00:17:03,413
and he will be right there putting...
262
00:17:03,486 --> 00:17:06,319
and I will be right here standing-
263
00:17:06,389 --> 00:17:09,358
♪ When I hit him
with the razzamatazz ♪
264
00:17:09,425 --> 00:17:13,919
You know, I've never actually played golf,
but, um, won't that disturb his game?
265
00:17:14,997 --> 00:17:17,363
Oh, yeah.
266
00:17:17,433 --> 00:17:21,529
Well, yeah, but it's worth it
for my Adella's last wish, isn't it?
267
00:17:21,604 --> 00:17:23,799
It's more than worth it.
268
00:17:23,873 --> 00:17:26,603
- Yeah. Good.
- And the big "W" will love it, Pop...
269
00:17:26,676 --> 00:17:29,372
but we gotta get out of here.
We gotta catch ourselves a killer.
270
00:17:29,445 --> 00:17:32,437
- I got me a song to write.
- Catch you later, Pop.
271
00:17:32,515 --> 00:17:35,973
[Jarod Narrating] It was nice
to see Benny again, but Argyle was right.
272
00:17:36,052 --> 00:17:41,388
We did have a killer to catch.
So we went back to the scene of the crime.
273
00:17:41,457 --> 00:17:44,392
Okay. Uh, Dirty Willy bought
it right about here...
274
00:17:44,460 --> 00:17:46,792
and I saw the killer
standing right over there.
275
00:17:46,863 --> 00:17:49,764
Hey, funny face,
this area's off limits, all right?
276
00:17:49,832 --> 00:17:51,977
I got top-notch talent
makin' their way through here...
277
00:17:52,001 --> 00:17:54,231
to the most glorious stage
in Las Vegas...
278
00:17:54,303 --> 00:17:57,739
and I can't have you
or that thing you call a suit in the way.
279
00:17:57,807 --> 00:18:00,786
- Let me explain.
- No. There's no explainin' that,
and who the hell are you?
280
00:18:00,810 --> 00:18:03,176
- My name is Dick Dixon.
- You're Dick Dixon?
281
00:18:03,246 --> 00:18:05,840
- Oh!
- You slept with my wife, you scumball!
282
00:18:05,915 --> 00:18:10,181
- I don't even know your wife.
- Thrifty Suites, number 38. Ring a bell, pumpkin?
283
00:18:10,253 --> 00:18:13,745
Hey, hey, hey, half-pint, this ain't about
your old lady givin' room service, all right?
284
00:18:13,823 --> 00:18:16,535
- We're tryin' to find Mona Jeffries.
- Yeah, well, I ain't seen her.
285
00:18:16,559 --> 00:18:19,460
What are you gonna do about it, tough guy?
[Yelps]
286
00:18:19,529 --> 00:18:21,690
You see that?
There goes my Chivas.
287
00:18:21,764 --> 00:18:23,909
- Where'd you learn how to do that?
- I ran a dojo once.
288
00:18:23,933 --> 00:18:27,012
- Now tell us what you know.
- Okay. I'll tell you what I told
the cops, all right?
289
00:18:27,036 --> 00:18:28,970
Mona ain't your typical showgirl,
all right? She-
290
00:18:29,038 --> 00:18:32,166
She won't show her cones,
and she saves her dough. [Yelps]
291
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:35,210
- She bought a condo outside of town.
- Where?
292
00:18:35,278 --> 00:18:38,611
[Yelps]
Okay! God! I'll tell ya! Geez!
293
00:18:42,318 --> 00:18:45,481
- I got your back, J-Man.
- Oh, that's very comforting.
294
00:18:45,555 --> 00:18:50,288
Either my Mona's real messy, J-Man,
or somethin' real bad happened to her.
295
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:53,886
You can stop right there.
Let's see some I.D.
296
00:18:53,963 --> 00:18:57,956
- The I.D.'s out in the car.
My name is Dick Dixon.
- You're Dick Dixon?
297
00:18:58,034 --> 00:19:00,969
- Yes.
- You slept with one of our deputies.
298
00:19:01,037 --> 00:19:03,164
She left the force 'cause of you.
299
00:19:07,376 --> 00:19:10,243
I seem to have that effect on people.
300
00:19:10,313 --> 00:19:13,646
- What happened here?
- Been a while since you cracked
your detective handbook, huh?
301
00:19:13,716 --> 00:19:17,675
We got a report ofa disturbance.
Door was jimmied, place had been trashed...
302
00:19:17,753 --> 00:19:20,620
but her car keys,
purse and valuables are still here.
303
00:19:21,791 --> 00:19:25,158
- Mona was leaving?
- No. She was kidnapped.
304
00:19:40,343 --> 00:19:43,437
[Knocking]
305
00:19:45,748 --> 00:19:49,206
- You gonna get that?
- [Knocking Continues]
306
00:19:49,285 --> 00:19:51,845
Those are the late-night creepers.
307
00:19:52,989 --> 00:19:56,083
- It is the honeymoon suite.
- [Knocking]
308
00:19:56,158 --> 00:19:58,956
[Door Closes]
309
00:19:59,028 --> 00:20:02,964
- [Faucet Turns, Water Running]
- [Martial Arts Grunts]
310
00:20:03,032 --> 00:20:05,660
[Imitating Elvis]
Oh, yeah. Thank you very much.
311
00:20:05,735 --> 00:20:10,138
- Oh, Syd. You're here early. [Clears Throat]
- I thought something was wrong.
312
00:20:10,206 --> 00:20:12,299
- [Water Running Continues]
- Oh, no. No.
313
00:20:12,375 --> 00:20:15,173
No. As a matter of fact,
Things are gonna be different from now on.
314
00:20:15,244 --> 00:20:17,940
- [Water Stops]
- Broots, you are gonna pay for...
315
00:20:18,014 --> 00:20:19,948
using all the hot water, you moron!
316
00:20:20,016 --> 00:20:21,950
You were saying, Broots?
317
00:20:22,018 --> 00:20:25,954
Syd, please tell me
you're here to relieve me.
318
00:20:26,022 --> 00:20:29,355
Being cooped up with Felix Ungar here
makes me glad to see your sorry mug.
319
00:20:29,425 --> 00:20:33,191
Lyle and I are registered at Caesars.
320
00:20:33,262 --> 00:20:35,196
Separate rooms?
321
00:20:35,264 --> 00:20:38,461
- Well, separate suites.
- [Scoffs]
322
00:20:38,534 --> 00:20:41,662
[Sydney] Lyle will be here later.
Perhaps we can take over.
323
00:20:41,737 --> 00:20:46,231
Hopefully, I won't have plugged Broots
before then. Call me when he gets here.
324
00:20:50,746 --> 00:20:54,807
- What?
- I thought things were gonna
be different between us.
325
00:20:54,884 --> 00:20:57,182
There is no "us."
326
00:20:57,253 --> 00:21:01,553
At least...
not that they know of.
327
00:21:03,926 --> 00:21:07,885
Could you imagine
what they would do if they knew?
328
00:21:07,964 --> 00:21:11,923
Right. Right. We don't-We don't wanna
give them any ammunition, now do we?
329
00:21:12,001 --> 00:21:14,868
Speaking of which...
330
00:21:14,937 --> 00:21:18,532
my clip is empty.
331
00:21:18,608 --> 00:21:21,577
Oh, yeah. I get it, baby.
332
00:21:21,644 --> 00:21:25,410
But if we're gonna do this-
[Whispering] we gotta do it right.
333
00:21:25,481 --> 00:21:28,678
I've always had a little fantasy
I want to live out with you.
334
00:21:28,751 --> 00:21:31,845
But first I want you to call me...
335
00:21:32,922 --> 00:21:35,117
"Puff Daddy."
336
00:21:35,191 --> 00:21:38,058
Say it. Say it.
337
00:21:39,128 --> 00:21:42,188
- Puff-
- [Inhales] Daddy.
338
00:21:42,264 --> 00:21:44,255
Oh!
339
00:21:44,333 --> 00:21:46,699
[Sighs]
340
00:21:46,769 --> 00:21:52,708
- ♪ [Soul, Slow]
- [Man Reciting Introduction On CD Player]
341
00:21:55,144 --> 00:21:57,738
♪ [Continues]
342
00:22:03,886 --> 00:22:06,912
♪ [Chorus Singing Soul]
343
00:22:09,659 --> 00:22:12,127
♪ [Continues]
344
00:22:26,676 --> 00:22:29,839
♪ [Saxophone]
345
00:22:31,914 --> 00:22:33,905
♪ [Saxophone Continues]
346
00:22:36,819 --> 00:22:39,049
♪ [Fades Slowly]
347
00:22:40,189 --> 00:22:43,454
[Jarod Narrating] They say that
life is stranger than fiction.
348
00:22:43,526 --> 00:22:47,155
Mine certainly has been,
and this was no exception.
349
00:22:47,229 --> 00:22:50,130
Mona was kidnapped, but by whom?
350
00:22:50,199 --> 00:22:53,794
Whatever trouble her boss, Dirty Willy,
found, it had certainly found her...
351
00:22:53,869 --> 00:22:57,361
and it was only a matter of time
before it found us.
352
00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:01,570
I did what Syndey always taught me:
When in doubt, go back to the evidence.
353
00:23:01,644 --> 00:23:05,045
A couple of things just don't make any
sense. According to the autopsy report...
354
00:23:05,114 --> 00:23:08,208
what killed Dirty Willy
was low levels of oxygen in his tissues...
355
00:23:08,284 --> 00:23:10,809
due to hypothermia-extreme cold.
356
00:23:10,886 --> 00:23:13,320
He froze to death.
In Vegas?
357
00:23:13,389 --> 00:23:17,189
And he had several ice pick holes
in his hands.
358
00:23:17,259 --> 00:23:19,250
I'm thinkin' torture.
359
00:23:21,630 --> 00:23:23,564
Wait a second, J-Man.
360
00:23:23,632 --> 00:23:26,465
You don't think who's ever doin' this
might, you know...
361
00:23:26,535 --> 00:23:28,332
- poke Mona like that?
- Let's hope not.
362
00:23:30,239 --> 00:23:33,800
According to this file,
he is the number one suspect:
363
00:23:33,876 --> 00:23:38,404
Constantin Falzone-an extortionist
for the Posavac crime family.
364
00:23:38,481 --> 00:23:41,314
What other part of your two-plus-two case
don't add up to four?
365
00:23:41,383 --> 00:23:44,250
[Jarod]
Dirty Willy weighed over 300 pounds.
366
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:48,017
Frozen or not, that's a lot of Willy
for one man to carry around.
367
00:23:48,090 --> 00:23:50,490
- Wait. What are you sayin', "J"?
- There were two killers...
368
00:23:50,559 --> 00:23:53,050
who tortured Dirty Willy
and froze him to death.
369
00:23:53,129 --> 00:23:55,996
Question is,
what did they want out of him?
370
00:23:56,065 --> 00:24:01,662
[Exhales]
That's easy, baby-cash, do-re-mi, J-Man.
371
00:24:01,737 --> 00:24:04,501
Everybody knows
Falzone collects around town...
372
00:24:04,573 --> 00:24:06,939
so maybe Dirty Willy
couldn't come up with the green...
373
00:24:07,009 --> 00:24:09,204
and the twins get P.O.'d with him.
374
00:24:09,278 --> 00:24:12,406
- Twins?
- Falzone's got these Frigidaires
that work for him.
375
00:24:12,481 --> 00:24:15,973
- Calls 'em his caddies.
- Caddies? Why?
376
00:24:16,051 --> 00:24:18,451
[Jarod Narrating]
Falzone-Sin City old-timer.
377
00:24:18,521 --> 00:24:22,548
Doesn't care about shopping malls, pirate
ships or the Eiffel Tower in the desert.
378
00:24:22,625 --> 00:24:25,958
He's only interested in cash...
and a three handicap.
379
00:24:26,028 --> 00:24:29,429
J-Rod, those two goons killed Dirty Willy
and kidnapped my Mona.
380
00:24:29,498 --> 00:24:31,693
I say we waste 'em and snag Falzone.
381
00:24:31,767 --> 00:24:35,203
No. We meet Falzone out there
on his own turf.
382
00:24:35,271 --> 00:24:37,205
But you don't know how to play.
383
00:24:37,273 --> 00:24:40,470
It's all geometry and physics.
How hard could that be?
384
00:24:40,543 --> 00:24:44,570
[Narrating] Sydney always taught me,
the most difficult Pretends
have an inner secret.
385
00:24:44,647 --> 00:24:48,378
Once you reveal that secret,
it comes naturally.
386
00:25:31,227 --> 00:25:33,161
- [Club Hits Bushes]
- [Bird Squawking]
387
00:25:35,664 --> 00:25:37,154
[Dog Barks]
388
00:25:41,203 --> 00:25:44,297
In 56 minutes, I found the secret
to a perfect golf game.
389
00:25:44,373 --> 00:25:46,534
I'll share it with you sometime.
390
00:25:46,609 --> 00:25:49,169
The twins were impressed,
just like I said.
391
00:25:49,245 --> 00:25:51,179
Falzone wanted to take me on.
392
00:25:53,182 --> 00:25:55,844
- Then I told them I was Dick Dixon.
- [No Audible Dialogue]
393
00:25:55,918 --> 00:25:58,478
Guess which one's married.
394
00:25:58,554 --> 00:26:03,253
The twins promised to get us to Falzone,
which they did.
395
00:26:03,325 --> 00:26:07,819
However, in true Chandleresque fashion,
we found out it was with a twist.
396
00:26:07,897 --> 00:26:10,365
Someone else had gotten to him first.
397
00:26:12,434 --> 00:26:15,801
And to think I wasted 56 minutes.
398
00:26:18,741 --> 00:26:23,440
Raymond Chandler always said,
"The best way to get a reader's attention
is with a dead body."
399
00:26:23,512 --> 00:26:25,980
But of course,
Chandler wasn't writing this one.
400
00:26:27,049 --> 00:26:30,212
[Gasping]
I got balls!
401
00:26:31,887 --> 00:26:35,618
[Splashing]
I got balls.
402
00:26:37,293 --> 00:26:41,923
Unbe-friggin-lievable.
People actually throw these away.
403
00:26:41,997 --> 00:26:45,831
- And that makes them yours.
- Possession is 9/10ths.
404
00:26:45,901 --> 00:26:50,395
You oughta know.
I hear Dick Dixon steals wives.
405
00:26:50,472 --> 00:26:54,738
And I hear you hang Dirty Willys.
And now you've kidnapped Mona Jeffries.
406
00:26:54,810 --> 00:26:57,643
How come I get the feeling
you cheat at golf?
407
00:26:57,713 --> 00:27:00,739
If you're not cheating,
you're not playing.
408
00:27:00,816 --> 00:27:04,183
- Hey, we want Mona back.
- Who are you-Little Dick?
409
00:27:04,253 --> 00:27:06,448
All right. I'll show you little,
ya big freak.
410
00:27:06,522 --> 00:27:11,824
Hey. Dirty Willy never came up short,
so there's no reason to kill him.
411
00:27:11,894 --> 00:27:15,660
As for Mona,
a Viagra-poppin' man such as myself...
412
00:27:15,731 --> 00:27:19,030
can only pray to enjoy a muffin
like that in the morning.
413
00:27:19,101 --> 00:27:24,733
All right. That's it. You and me gonna throw
right now, paisan. I had it with this mook.
414
00:27:24,807 --> 00:27:28,868
Hey. I got no beef with Dirty Willy.
I got no beef with you, Dixon.
415
00:27:28,944 --> 00:27:32,675
Mona asked me for help. She said
that Dirty Willy was gettin's queezed...
416
00:27:32,748 --> 00:27:36,275
by, um, a couple of goons
by the name of the Frost Brothers.
417
00:27:36,352 --> 00:27:40,152
- [Together] The Frost Brothers?
- The Frost Brothers.
418
00:27:40,222 --> 00:27:44,454
Now I got my finger in every casino
in this whole town. I never heard
of these guys.
419
00:27:44,526 --> 00:27:47,518
Okay? So that's it. That's all I know.
All right? Are we done? Are we done?
420
00:27:48,597 --> 00:27:51,191
- Let's go.
- Let's go.
421
00:27:52,935 --> 00:27:55,733
Give me my balls.
422
00:28:01,310 --> 00:28:05,644
♪ [Humming] Room service.
423
00:28:05,714 --> 00:28:08,774
I was just talkin' to the manager.
You won't believe what he was telling me.
424
00:28:08,851 --> 00:28:12,252
- And what would that be, Mr. Broots?
- Glad you could join us.
425
00:28:12,321 --> 00:28:16,758
[Raines] Centre employees
of opposite genders don't room together.
426
00:28:16,825 --> 00:28:20,192
Just show him.
427
00:28:20,262 --> 00:28:23,527
Taken by a security camera
at McCarran International Airport.
428
00:28:23,599 --> 00:28:26,727
It's of Jarod heading for the runway.
He skipped town.
429
00:28:26,802 --> 00:28:30,033
Your theory isn't holding.
It's time to go home.
430
00:28:30,105 --> 00:28:34,098
No, but the-the e-mail said that he
was gonna be here. W-We have to stay.
431
00:28:34,176 --> 00:28:37,236
- Broots, it's over.
- No. I just talked to the manager.
432
00:28:37,312 --> 00:28:39,912
He took a reservation last night
under the name of "Jarod Siegel"-
433
00:28:39,982 --> 00:28:42,712
as in "Bugsy Siegel,"
the man who created Vegas.
434
00:28:42,785 --> 00:28:44,912
A reservation
doesn't mean he's gonna show.
435
00:28:44,987 --> 00:28:46,921
- We're leaving.
- We're staying.
436
00:28:47,923 --> 00:28:50,585
Did he just ignore us?
437
00:28:50,659 --> 00:28:53,753
You wanna barge in here
and try and scare me? You go ahead.
438
00:28:53,829 --> 00:28:59,768
But don't question my skills.
I'm not second string anymore.
I do a job, and I do it well.
439
00:28:59,835 --> 00:29:03,896
And if your paranoid minds can't take that,
then you can go chase that photo.
440
00:29:03,972 --> 00:29:06,202
Miss Parker and I will catch Jarod.
441
00:29:14,316 --> 00:29:16,511
Enjoy your breakfast.
442
00:29:17,953 --> 00:29:20,945
[Wheels Squeaking]
443
00:29:29,665 --> 00:29:32,498
You better hope we catch Jarod,
or we're through.
444
00:29:32,568 --> 00:29:34,559
- You mean us?
- I mean our necks.
445
00:29:39,108 --> 00:29:41,386
[Jarod Narrating]
As Argyle and I drove back to Benny's...
446
00:29:41,410 --> 00:29:45,107
we knew that without the mysterious
Frost Brothers, there was no Mona...
447
00:29:45,180 --> 00:29:48,274
and no dream for Argyle.
448
00:29:48,350 --> 00:29:51,649
But Argyle 's dream
wasn't the only one in jeopardy.
449
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:55,247
- Oh, those bastards. Bastards, all of them!
- Benny, what happened?
450
00:29:55,324 --> 00:29:58,384
There I am.
I am standing there in the bunker.
451
00:29:58,460 --> 00:30:01,793
I am halfway into my "overature,"
and they grab me.
452
00:30:01,864 --> 00:30:04,765
- Wayne's bodyguards.
- Oh, bite your tongue. Wayne's people...
453
00:30:04,833 --> 00:30:07,324
would never do that with a rake.
454
00:30:07,402 --> 00:30:11,031
Ah, it was those lowlifes that work for
the other half of Wayne's threesome-
455
00:30:11,106 --> 00:30:13,666
those "mugicians" with the big hair?
456
00:30:13,742 --> 00:30:16,440
It's a good thing
they didn't bring their tigers, boy.
457
00:30:16,573 --> 00:30:19,906
- Whew.
- So Wayne never heard your song?
458
00:30:19,976 --> 00:30:24,242
No. And I know he would've loved it.
He would've loved it.
459
00:30:24,314 --> 00:30:26,475
Of course he would have.
460
00:30:26,550 --> 00:30:29,713
- What's the matter with him?
- We haven't found Mona yet.
461
00:30:29,786 --> 00:30:35,452
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
It's always a girl, isn't it?
462
00:30:36,927 --> 00:30:39,361
Let me let you in
on a little tiny secret.
463
00:30:39,429 --> 00:30:41,363
He's just exactly like me.
464
00:30:41,431 --> 00:30:46,459
- No.
- Oh, yes. I was wild. I was unchecked...
465
00:30:46,536 --> 00:30:48,800
until my Adella tamed me.
466
00:30:48,872 --> 00:30:53,502
I still remember that trip to Vegas.
We wanted to get away from it all.
467
00:30:53,577 --> 00:30:58,344
Dr. Kanapa had told us that
we wouldn't be able to have a family...
468
00:30:58,415 --> 00:31:01,816
and I know it was really tough for her.
469
00:31:01,885 --> 00:31:03,819
But my Adella-
470
00:31:03,887 --> 00:31:07,983
God, she looked so beautiful
the night we went to see Wayne.
471
00:31:08,058 --> 00:31:13,121
Ya never saw a polka dot dress
like that in your life.
472
00:31:13,196 --> 00:31:15,824
Well, big Wayne-
473
00:31:15,899 --> 00:31:19,995
he picks her out of the whole crowd...
474
00:31:20,070 --> 00:31:24,769
and he sang "Danke Schoen" right to her.
475
00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:27,332
- It was-
- Like a dream.
476
00:31:27,410 --> 00:31:33,349
Yeah. That night,
Adella came back to the motor court...
477
00:31:33,416 --> 00:31:35,714
all giddy from Wayne's show, you know?
478
00:31:35,785 --> 00:31:41,417
And we drove the cattle across the prairie
all night long, if you catch my meaning...
479
00:31:43,159 --> 00:31:45,889
and... we were blessed.
480
00:31:45,962 --> 00:31:50,729
- You conceived Argyle.
- Rolled a hard eight. [Chuckles]
481
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:53,997
- [Benny] So now, when I see him
goin'through all this-
- [Dog Whimpers]
482
00:31:54,070 --> 00:31:58,939
I think, "Where would I be today
if it weren't for my Adella?"
483
00:32:00,176 --> 00:32:02,110
She was your Mona.
484
00:32:04,047 --> 00:32:06,743
[Sighs]
Jarod...
485
00:32:06,816 --> 00:32:10,650
ya gotta find that girl for my boy.
486
00:32:11,721 --> 00:32:13,655
[Dog Whimpers]
487
00:32:15,559 --> 00:32:18,221
[Jarod Narrating]
It seems everybody who met Mona wanted her:
488
00:32:18,295 --> 00:32:20,957
Argyle, her brother, Falzone.
489
00:32:21,031 --> 00:32:23,295
It got my detective gears spinning.
490
00:32:23,366 --> 00:32:26,961
Look, buddy boy.
I followed her home once-okay, twice.
491
00:32:27,037 --> 00:32:31,440
Nick had known everything about Mona:
where she lived, how she saved her money.
492
00:32:31,508 --> 00:32:33,499
Maybe he knew
who the Frost Brothers were.
493
00:32:33,577 --> 00:32:37,240
- But I swear, I never heard of
the Frost Brothers.
- It was almost a dead end.
494
00:32:37,314 --> 00:32:39,248
- Almost.
- Dixon.
495
00:32:39,316 --> 00:32:43,275
Deputy Wyatt hadn't punched me
the first time we met.
Guess he figured I was due.
496
00:32:43,353 --> 00:32:47,983
- Oh, this is gettin' really old.
- You tryin' to destroy three months
of real police work?
497
00:32:48,058 --> 00:32:50,583
- We almost got Falzone for extortion.
- So get him.
498
00:32:50,660 --> 00:32:52,958
After you talked to him?
You of all people should know...
499
00:32:53,029 --> 00:32:55,827
there's only one way
to do things in this town: the Vegas way.
500
00:32:55,899 --> 00:32:58,424
What about the Frost Brothers way?
501
00:32:58,501 --> 00:33:00,628
- What's that place got to do with anything?
- Place?
502
00:33:00,704 --> 00:33:02,296
- Place?
- Place?
503
00:33:02,372 --> 00:33:07,002
Place. It's an abandoned meat-packing plant
outside town. So what?
504
00:33:11,181 --> 00:33:14,150
[Dog Barking, Whimpers]
505
00:33:17,954 --> 00:33:21,788
Mona?
Mona?
506
00:33:21,858 --> 00:33:24,952
[Whimpering, Barks]
507
00:33:26,029 --> 00:33:27,963
Mona?
508
00:33:31,034 --> 00:33:33,935
Mona! Mona!
509
00:33:34,971 --> 00:33:38,498
- Mona.
- I didn't think you'd come.
510
00:33:38,575 --> 00:33:42,841
- Oh, you're so cold.
L-Let's get you out of here.
- Argyle, these two guys-
511
00:33:42,912 --> 00:33:44,903
They had masks on.
They grabbed me.
512
00:33:44,981 --> 00:33:48,007
They've been trying to get me to tell them
what Dirty Willy told me.
513
00:33:48,084 --> 00:33:51,679
But I can't tell them that secret,
'cause I can't do that to Willy.
514
00:33:51,755 --> 00:33:54,519
- Well, you could tel I us the secret, Mona.
- Tell us later.
515
00:33:54,591 --> 00:33:56,218
We have to get out of here right now.
516
00:33:56,292 --> 00:33:58,692
Yeah. We need to get you back
to your brother.
517
00:33:58,762 --> 00:34:01,094
Brother?
I don't have a brother.
518
00:34:01,164 --> 00:34:04,156
- Sure you do. Two of'em.
- [Barks]
519
00:34:04,234 --> 00:34:08,398
- [Dog Growling]
- Argyle, say hello to the Frost Brothers.
520
00:34:08,471 --> 00:34:13,204
[Continues Growling]
521
00:34:19,949 --> 00:34:22,850
[Jarod Narrating]
It was a case to make Ray Chandler proud.
522
00:34:22,919 --> 00:34:26,719
Let's review.
Our two sheriff deputies, Wyatt and Mike...
523
00:34:26,790 --> 00:34:31,318
they killed Dirty Willy-
tortured him, froze him, hung him.
524
00:34:31,394 --> 00:34:35,524
But what did they want out of him?
Money? Do-re-mi?
525
00:34:35,598 --> 00:34:38,277
- You won't be surprised
if I tell you the answer is no.
- [Whimpers]
526
00:34:38,301 --> 00:34:41,566
Dirty Willy had
one dirty little secret left...
527
00:34:41,638 --> 00:34:45,074
and these guys were trying
to get it out of Mona... and us.
528
00:34:45,141 --> 00:34:48,872
- It's been eight hours. Start talking.
- I got nothin' to say.
529
00:34:48,945 --> 00:34:52,904
You just don't get it, do you, Dixon?
We do things the Vegas way.
530
00:34:52,982 --> 00:34:56,509
Now, Mona's brother here
is gonna drive her into the desert.
531
00:34:56,586 --> 00:35:01,387
If he doesn't hear from me in 30,
she's gone, and I ice the two of you.
532
00:35:03,893 --> 00:35:07,659
- Oh, and I keep the dog.
- [Growling Continues]
533
00:35:07,731 --> 00:35:10,928
Don't give 'em anything, Argyle.
Not one quarter!
534
00:35:12,702 --> 00:35:15,227
- [Barking]
- Ah, put a sock in it, Dog.
535
00:35:15,305 --> 00:35:17,239
That was a strange thing to say.
536
00:35:17,307 --> 00:35:19,798
Yeah, right-
especially since dogs don't wear socks.
537
00:35:19,876 --> 00:35:23,937
Not Dog. Mona. She said, "not a quarter."
"Don't give them one quarter."
538
00:35:24,013 --> 00:35:27,471
Well, J-Man, Mona left a bucket
full of quarters in Dick Dixon's office.
539
00:35:27,550 --> 00:35:32,078
Dirty Willy's secret. Whatever he was tryin'
to protect must have been in that bucket.
540
00:35:32,155 --> 00:35:35,420
- Wyatt!
- Hey, what the hell are you doin'?
541
00:35:35,492 --> 00:35:38,586
I'm gonna give him what he wants.
Wyatt!
542
00:35:47,237 --> 00:35:50,331
- There it is.
- [Beeps]
543
00:35:50,406 --> 00:35:52,806
[Wyatt On Tape]
Look, Willy. If you pay us what we need...
544
00:35:52,876 --> 00:35:55,504
we won't need to get rough with you.
[Beeps]
545
00:35:55,578 --> 00:35:58,706
Falzone wasn't extorting money
from Willy and his club. You were.
546
00:35:58,782 --> 00:36:00,682
And the dirty fat boy
recorded me doin' it.
547
00:36:00,750 --> 00:36:05,153
- All the time you just wanted that tape,
it was right there.
- Nice work, detectives.
548
00:36:05,221 --> 00:36:07,553
Willy was just tryin' to get that tape
to Dick Dixon.
549
00:36:07,624 --> 00:36:10,115
So now you got it.
Call your deputy and let Mona go.
550
00:36:10,193 --> 00:36:13,526
Poor Willy didn't even know
that Dick Dixon had skipped town.
551
00:36:13,596 --> 00:36:17,123
Wait a second.
You're not Dick Dixon?
552
00:36:18,968 --> 00:36:22,335
- No.
- [Slot Machine Bell Ringing]
553
00:36:22,405 --> 00:36:25,704
- [Ice Pick Tapping On Desk]
- Loser.
554
00:36:25,775 --> 00:36:28,209
[Tapping Continues]
555
00:36:28,278 --> 00:36:30,803
[Groaning]
556
00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:32,871
Oh, hi, there.
557
00:36:33,950 --> 00:36:36,248
- Let me outta this.
- Uh-uh.
558
00:36:36,319 --> 00:36:39,031
- You know, you should be protecting
people... [Slot Machine Clicking]
559
00:36:39,055 --> 00:36:40,989
not extorting from them.
560
00:36:41,057 --> 00:36:43,548
But I guess that's what they call
the "Vegas way," right?
561
00:36:43,626 --> 00:36:46,026
- Oh, yeah.
- Well, we've already tried that.
562
00:36:46,095 --> 00:36:48,325
- Let's try the Jarod way.
- No! No! No!
563
00:36:49,766 --> 00:36:52,234
- You're totally whacked.
- You don't know the half of it.
564
00:36:52,302 --> 00:36:56,568
- You're going to make a call.
You're going to let Mona go.
- I don't think so.
565
00:36:56,639 --> 00:36:58,698
- Loser.
- [Sighs]
566
00:36:58,775 --> 00:37:01,710
- [Wyatt Yelps]
- Oh. Ooh, that's harder than golf.
567
00:37:01,778 --> 00:37:03,678
- You're outta your mind.
- Make the call.
568
00:37:03,746 --> 00:37:05,543
- No.
- Uh, loser.
569
00:37:09,786 --> 00:37:13,347
- Last chance.
- [Breathing Heavily]
570
00:37:13,423 --> 00:37:16,392
- Loser.
- Okay.
571
00:37:18,461 --> 00:37:21,521
- Fore!
- [Jarod Narrating] Wyatt finally made the call.
572
00:37:21,598 --> 00:37:25,466
And so did I-to the F..B.I.
573
00:37:25,535 --> 00:37:28,504
When they arrived at the office,
they found a killer waiting for them...
574
00:37:28,571 --> 00:37:30,732
along with the evidence
to convict him-
575
00:37:30,807 --> 00:37:33,799
all courtesy of the mysterious
Richard W. Dixon.
576
00:37:34,410 --> 00:37:36,344
But the story isn't over.
577
00:37:36,412 --> 00:37:38,880
I still have one more job to do.
578
00:37:40,383 --> 00:37:42,749
Anything?
579
00:37:42,819 --> 00:37:44,753
Nothing.
580
00:37:44,821 --> 00:37:49,554
Which is what we're gonna be
when we get back to the Centre.
581
00:37:49,626 --> 00:37:54,290
It was fun while it lasted-
[Whispering] Puff Daddy.
582
00:37:57,967 --> 00:38:01,232
[Faucet Turns, Water Running]
583
00:38:06,376 --> 00:38:08,344
Miss-
584
00:38:13,182 --> 00:38:17,278
Hoo. I guess I'm not a scrub anymore.
585
00:38:18,988 --> 00:38:22,856
I hope you like Renewal Wing,
'cause I'm gettin' you a gift certificate.
586
00:38:22,926 --> 00:38:27,022
The Centre reeducators can wipe
this entire weekend from your brain.
587
00:38:27,096 --> 00:38:31,556
[Jarod]
Well, you better tell them
that Broots caught me.
588
00:38:34,070 --> 00:38:36,538
[Chuckles]
589
00:38:39,375 --> 00:38:43,311
Don't have to.
We're a team, aren't we...
590
00:38:43,379 --> 00:38:45,438
Dr. Funkenstein?
591
00:38:45,515 --> 00:38:48,609
Well, that all depends
on one thing, baby.
592
00:38:48,685 --> 00:38:51,813
Am I your Puff Daddy?
593
00:38:55,058 --> 00:38:59,358
[Sighs]
Oh, yeah, baby.
594
00:38:59,429 --> 00:39:03,991
And I wanna get funked up.
595
00:39:06,703 --> 00:39:09,672
Oh, I have to watch?
596
00:39:11,174 --> 00:39:13,165
You get to watch.
597
00:39:13,242 --> 00:39:15,506
[Both Giggle]
598
00:39:15,578 --> 00:39:19,070
I'll tell you what, Mr. Funkadelic.
599
00:39:19,148 --> 00:39:23,209
If we're gonna do this,
let's do it right.
600
00:39:24,220 --> 00:39:26,518
It's my turn to live out a fantasy.
601
00:39:26,589 --> 00:39:31,754
- Bald men have always driven me crazy.
- [Broots Chuckles]
602
00:39:31,828 --> 00:39:36,060
- ♪ [Chorus Singing Slow Soul]
- And it takes more than one
to really satisfy me.
603
00:39:36,132 --> 00:39:39,033
- Mr. Wiggles, get in here!
- ♪ [Continues]
604
00:39:39,102 --> 00:39:41,297
[Wheels Squeaking]
605
00:39:46,976 --> 00:39:49,706
[Spoken Lyric]
606
00:39:49,779 --> 00:39:53,840
♪ [Continues]
607
00:39:58,354 --> 00:40:00,720
No.
608
00:40:02,825 --> 00:40:05,259
Miss Parker, what about us?
609
00:40:05,328 --> 00:40:08,297
[Spoken Lyric]
610
00:40:08,364 --> 00:40:10,696
No.
611
00:40:10,767 --> 00:40:13,065
No.
612
00:40:13,136 --> 00:40:16,867
No. No.
613
00:40:16,939 --> 00:40:19,100
No!
614
00:40:19,175 --> 00:40:23,703
What the-Ah! Mr. Wiggles.
[Sputters] Ow.
615
00:40:23,780 --> 00:40:26,078
I told you not to fall asleep.
616
00:40:26,149 --> 00:40:28,583
- I was asleep?
- Yeah.
617
00:40:29,652 --> 00:40:32,644
- The whole time?
- Yes, Rip Van Winkle.
618
00:40:32,722 --> 00:40:36,214
You were makin'
some weird noises too.
619
00:40:36,292 --> 00:40:41,059
And by the way, what exactly
is a "Puff Daddy"?
620
00:40:54,610 --> 00:40:57,875
[Jarod Narrating]
Like I said, I have one more thing to do.
621
00:40:57,947 --> 00:41:01,007
But it isn't this... dream.
622
00:41:01,084 --> 00:41:03,245
- It's somebody else's.
- [Strains]
623
00:41:08,591 --> 00:41:11,526
- Can I help you with that?
- Why, I-
624
00:41:12,728 --> 00:41:15,288
- [Chuckling]
- Oh, God. Oh, God.
625
00:41:15,364 --> 00:41:20,961
If you knew, sir, how much I've wanted
to meet-This is an honor, sir.
626
00:41:21,037 --> 00:41:26,168
- This is an honor.
- Listen. Third row, polka dot dress.
627
00:41:26,242 --> 00:41:28,540
- Sir?
- Adella.
628
00:41:28,611 --> 00:41:32,638
- She was wearin' a polka dot dress.
- You are a god.
629
00:41:32,715 --> 00:41:38,278
[Chuckles] Listen. I understand
there's something you'd like me to hear.
630
00:41:38,354 --> 00:41:41,834
- Well, as a matter of fact, uh,
you probably wouldn't wanna-
- ♪ [Accordion: Stray Notes]
631
00:41:41,858 --> 00:41:43,621
- You know-
- I'd love to.
632
00:41:43,693 --> 00:41:45,183
- You would?
- I would.
633
00:41:45,261 --> 00:41:47,388
- Yeah? [Chuckles]
- ♪ [Stray Notes]
634
00:41:47,463 --> 00:41:50,864
Okay. Here we go.
635
00:41:50,933 --> 00:41:54,801
♪ [Swing Introduction]
636
00:41:54,871 --> 00:41:57,499
♪ AufWiedersehen, baby ♪
637
00:41:57,573 --> 00:42:01,805
♪ AufWiedersehen ♪
638
00:42:01,878 --> 00:42:04,346
♪ It means good-bye, my baby ♪
639
00:42:04,413 --> 00:42:08,144
♪ I don't know why
I feel this pain ♪
640
00:42:08,217 --> 00:42:10,549
♪ It's not my goiter ♪
641
00:42:10,620 --> 00:42:13,748
♪ But let's reconnoiter ♪
642
00:42:13,823 --> 00:42:18,487
♪ So even though I'm on that
far-off desert in Morocco ♪
643
00:42:18,561 --> 00:42:21,826
- ♪ I'm feelin' rocko,
but I wanna do this refrain ♪
- [Howls]
644
00:42:21,898 --> 00:42:24,765
♪ AufWiedersehen ♪
645
00:42:24,834 --> 00:42:27,598
- ♪ AufWiedersehen ♪♪
- ♪ [Ends]
646
00:42:27,670 --> 00:42:30,104
- [Laughing]
- [Jarod, Argyle] Whoo!
647
00:42:33,442 --> 00:42:35,876
Well, that was unmistakablyyou.
648
00:42:35,945 --> 00:42:40,075
- That's just the first verse.
There's more to come.
- I cannot wait.
649
00:42:40,149 --> 00:42:42,845
Uh, listen.
I wanna see you all tonight at my show.
650
00:42:42,919 --> 00:42:45,717
You'll be my guest.
I'll leave your names at the front door.
651
00:42:45,788 --> 00:42:51,522
And by the way, I want you to know
that Adella was my inspiration too.
652
00:42:51,594 --> 00:42:55,052
- Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you.
- See you. See you tonight.
653
00:42:56,432 --> 00:42:58,832
[Benny]
What a guy.
654
00:42:58,901 --> 00:43:01,267
- Thank you.
- My pleasure.
655
00:43:01,337 --> 00:43:04,431
That could be the worst song
I've ever heard.
656
00:43:04,507 --> 00:43:08,068
- I know. But to him it was a dream come true.
- [Chuckles]
657
00:43:08,144 --> 00:43:10,078
Guess they mean a lot to you, huh?
658
00:43:10,146 --> 00:43:14,139
- He listened. He liked it.
- [Argyle] Standing room only, Pop.
659
00:43:14,217 --> 00:43:17,880
Speaking of a lot,
thank you for that donation.
660
00:43:17,954 --> 00:43:19,888
It was for a good cause.
661
00:43:19,956 --> 00:43:22,447
You know, I don't think I ever
got your name.
662
00:43:22,525 --> 00:43:25,392
Well, everyone in town
calls me Dick Dixon.
663
00:43:25,461 --> 00:43:30,592
- You're Dick Dixon?
- Yes.
664
00:43:32,235 --> 00:43:34,169
- [Impact]
- [Body Hitting Ground]
57566
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