All language subtitles for The Michael J Fox Show s01e15 chi.eng

Figure skating?
Did you order the wrong book again?

We've got to change that
one-click setting on Amazon.

True, this finger is a loaded gun,
but I have to read this.

The station's sending someone
to cover the winter olympics,

and I thought maybe I'd
turn my hat into the ring.

The olympics? In Russia?
That's all the way in Russia.

You know, you would
clean up on Jeopardy!

Seriously, this is a big opportunity.
The winter olympics are as big as it gets.

Well, after the summer olympics.

I was on the fast track
to be a national reporter,

and then Parkinson's sidelined me.

So I get to spend more
time with my family,

which is great...
in its own way.

- Can you get this off?
- Mostly great.

So I'd really like to go, but
only if it's okay with you.

I think it sounds
exciting. You should go.

Really? Good, 'cause
I told Harris I would.

Oh, thanks for the
pretend consideration.

Still it's a long time
to be away from the kids.

I don't want to miss
any special moments.

I don't mean to be that guy,
but could you try to keep it down?

- I'm taking a nap.
- Or I could extend my trip.

Hey, Eve, sorry that we woke you

in the middle of the day,
but, since you're up, any

progress on choosing an
activity for your college resume.

Actually, I have found
the perfect activity.

It's got everything you want.
It's after school, it's competitive,

- and it could lead to a scholarship.
- I'm all ears.

The miss outstanding
Teen Manhattan Beauty Pageant.

- You're serious.
- Dead serious.

Unless mom is against it,
and then I could go do

some more brainstorming
and get back to you

- in, like, a week or two.
- No, I think that

a teen beauty pageant
is a great idea.

You should go for that.

- You're serious too.
- Totally.

- Great.
- Great.

- This doesn't seem great.
- Then I will go sign up for that.

- What just happened?
- Keep up, Mike.

Eve picked something I
hate so I'll forbid it, and

then she can go back to
stalling, so I call her bluff,

knowing that she'll quit, then I get
to make her do whatever I want.

- You scare me.
- Listen, I've been winning

the mother/daughter fights
since I was the daughter.

You don't get to go
on coed camping trips

at 16 unless you have
got some serious game.

You hate camping trips.
Why would you want to...

Oh.

1x15 - Sochi

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I'd love to send you
to the olympics, Mike,

but I just can't pick whoever I want.

I have to justify it
to the folks upstairs.

- Who knows more about hockey than me?
- It's not just hockey.

There's bobsled... two-man bobsled,
four-man bobsled.

I'm all over bobsled. I was Captain
of my bobsled team in college.

- Really?
- No, there's no such thing,

but I was convincing, wasn't I?

Check this out. I made a demo.

Oh. You're gonna need this.
Prepare to be inspired.

When Kevin White was
growing up, money was tight,

but that didn't stop him from
chasing his olympic dream.

No, no, no, what's that?

Somebody messed with the music.
I had something inspiring

laid in there, like...

No, that's too down.
You need something

triumphant like...

- la la la la
- You guys, like, having a little jam sesh?

Now I know who messed with my demo.

Michael, are you
making excuses again?

You know, a poor
workman blames his tools.

- I just blamed one tool.
- Oh, yeah. Hey, Harris,

if you want a correspondent
with some real chops,

- you want to take a look at that.
- Great. She made a demo.

Oh, no, no,
that's a bootleg copy of Looper.

I'm a walking demo.
My work speaks for itself.

You gotta convince them to send me.

I don't know, Mike.
She gave me Looper.

You gave me clown music.

And then the lights started to flicker.

And then there was this fluttering,

groaning, tapping sound,
almost like a rapping.

I'm pretty sure there's
a ghost in my apartment.

- Cool.
- No, ghosts don't exist, buddy.

I mentioned it to
Mrs. Friedman, and she said

that, back in the '20s,
some Navy guy was murdered

- in my apartment.
- Cool.

Okay, I'll get to the bottom of this.

I don't know that I'd
go on Mrs. Friedman's word.

She walks a loaf of bread
around the neighborhood.

She told me at a very lucid moment.
She was looking me straight in the eyes,

- her housecoat was closed...
- Whoa. Mrs. Friedman was right.

Some Navy guy did die down there.

- Yup.
- Oh, he's an Admiral and very handsome.

Like a sexy Captain Crunch.

Cool. It says he got
stabbed in the neck.

Graham, stop reading
and go play video games.

As you know, we can only
send one of you to Sochi,

along with Clete from sports.

Well, whoever you decide
to recommend, Harris,

I know you'll do it with
the same Grace Manfred Schmidt

showed when he
luged to gold in 1968.

That is such a steaming pile
of unsolicited sports knowledge.

I'm sorry if I'm industrious
like Frank-Peter Roetsch,

who snagged double gold
on the biathlon in 1980... ow.

- Really, Susan? Really?
- In my defense, I never said

that I wasn't wearing an ear piece
and having an intern feed me facts.

Is this who we want representing us?
Someone with this little integrity?

And this much ear wax?

- Mike, you're going to Sochi.
- Yeah, yeah.

Yes!
Da svidaniya!

- Mike, don't make me change my mind.
- Into the "S" curve.

Yes, we all know that's a bobsled...

Mom had called my bluff.
All I could do now

was go in there and do my best...
at doing my least.

Honey, the unwed mothers
group meets across the hall.

Unwed mother? No. I'm here
for miss outstanding teen.

My mistake. We're about to
go through the opening number.

All right, guys, here we go.
Five, six, seven, eight.

And one, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight,

and one, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, and eight,

and one, two, three, and four.

Five, six, seven, eight, and one.

It turns out, even if you
don't care about something,

sucking at it sucks.

I think it's so great you
found a sitter so you could be here.

- I don't have a baby.
- I'm sorry.

I just made an assumption based
on your terrible appearance.

I'm Megan cute shoes.

- Thanks.
- No, that's what they call me.

- Megan "cute shoes."
- Cool.

- My name is...
- It doesn't matter.

You're not gonna make the cut.

- There he goes, Mikhail Henry.
- National spotlight, here I come.

Well, airport security's
gonna be a nightmare.

- You got everything?
- My passport and my boarding card.

I even took my belt off already
so that saves 15 minutes right there.

Oh, so now you have
everything you wanted,

- nothing can spoil it now, huh?
- Harris, why are you talking funny?

Why are you doing that with your face?

- Nothing.
- Hey, there, partner. Ready to go?

- She's coming?!
- Oh, Clete got food poisoning.

I feel bad. It was right
after I took him to dinner.

Anyway, now we can both go to Sochi.

- Mwah. Bye, Harris.
- Eh.

- You don't think she...
- Poisoned Clete?

Oh, most definitely.

We were just on a plane for 18 hours.

We can't just stop by our hotel first?

You don't want to see the
international broadcast center?

This is gonna be...
kind of rinky-dink.

NBC4.
Nikolai. I'm your translator!

I'm here to help you
with anything you need.

Okay, I'd like to get a
crew out to the hockey arena.

- The USA's playing Denmark.
- Yes!

- It's right through that door.
- Right.

You can't go.

- Why not?
- Local market news.

You have red pass.
If you want access

to the venues, you have
to be a national reporter

- with a gold pass.
- Well, hon, you expect us

to report the entire games
from within this room?

Seems impossible. Very sad.
But we have Wi-Fi.

But only two bars.

- Oh, well, at least we get a solid buffet.
- Oh, it's delicious.

- Gold pass?
- Very much so.

I not tell nobody.

Another thing I love about
the Admiral... he's so funny.

He did this thing with the lights.

Hold on. Do you think you
and this ghost are dating?

Don't be ridiculous.
It's only been a week.

We're just feeling things out.

Oh. Look who's off
to pageant practice.

- Having trouble with those high heels?
- How can shoes give you a headache?

Well, I guess it's worth
it since you're taking

- such a sincere interest in this.
- Just sign these forms.

It's mostly liability stuff

so they can't be sued if one
of us takes a baton to the face.

It happens more than it doesn't.

Ow.

- Playing mother/daughter chicken?
- Oh, yeah. She's holding her own,

but if she thinks I'm gonna be the
one to blink first and call this off...

Wait.
$600 entry fee?

- I'm calling this off.
- Sorry, I can't go down there with you.

The Admiral and I are staying in.

I'm trying to turn him
on to Downton Abbey.

That's a good call.
He'll probably love that

because it was set in his time period.

- That's a really good point...
- I was joking!

Ghosts don't watch TV.
They don't do anything.

- They're not real.
- Oh.

All right, this is a
full dress rehearsal, girls.

Spit out the gum and
tuck in those bra straps.

- Hi. Excuse me.
- Oh, I'm sorry, this is miss outstanding teen.

Mothers of unwed mothers
is across the hall.

What? No.

I'm here to pull my daughter
out of whatever...

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What? I...

She...

Really?

Harris, you got to get
me one of these in gold.

Those things are
harder to get than a date

- with supermodel Miranda Kerr.
- That was oddly specific.

I have some other
windows open on my screen.

Seriously, Harris,
I'm hamstrung here.

I only got one interview,
and it's with a Serbian curler.

And not a guy in the
Serbian olympic team.

Just a guy who curls from Serbia.

What are you doing?

Have you ever played
with this program?

Huh? It's amazing.

Hey, what are you doing
up there, little hearts?

Harris, I'm serious.
I'm stuck in a room

with 12 other broadcasters,
and we're all sharing one pen.

And he's sucking on it.
Dan's sucking on it.

Dan, really, seriously?

I'm sorry, Mike. Nothing I can do.
I'm just a dog.

- Any luck getting through security?
- I don't want to talk about it.

- Mom?
- This isn't a bluff.

- You really want to be a beauty queen.
- Okay, it was a total bluff at first,

but then I got here and all these girls
were laughing at me. I felt stupid.

Honey, I'm sure that they
weren't laughing at you.

No, no, they were.
See 'em doing it right now.

Hey, we can hear you!

Anyway, now all I want
to do is destroy them.

Oh, yeah, yup. I get that.

I get that real good.

Wait, so... so you're gonna help me?

Yup. We're gonna
start with your smile.

It's always bothered me,
ever since you were little.

- Come on.
- Oh.

- Oh, what a waste of time.
- Mm.

I could be home enjoying my family.

- Mm.
- You could be home poisoning sportscasters.

I did not poison Clete.
I took him to a marginal sushi joint.

- I reverse-yelped it.
- Yeah, you gotta lose the bindi.

Oh, ow, ow. That hurts.

You know, I know this
was stupid, but I actually

thought this was gonna be my
chance at the national stage.

Not so crazy.
I had the same thought.

You know, back in the
day you were pretty close.

- What happened?
- Seriously?

- Oh...
- I don't know. I can't help but wonder

where I'd be if things
turned out differently.

I'll tell you where you'd be.

You'd be two floors up
working with the big boys.

Thanks, Susan. Did...
Did we just enjoy a human moment?

- Tell anybody, I'll kill you.
- I believe you.

You know what, screw this.
We are too good for this.

With my street smarts and
your whatever you bring

to the table, we can get
ourselves out of it. Let's go.

You're more sneaky
and underhanded than me.

- I'm more of a...
- Guys, quick, the reporters from

Wichita trapped a
mouse in the kitchen.

Okay, I'm in.

Okay. Here's the plan.

Apparently
there's a national reporter

that didn't show up for his gold
pass, so the plan is simple...

Your name is Arthur Fry,
and you work for the BBC.

- You want me to pretend I'm British?
- I can do all the talking.

Oy, there, Governor,
where we get our badges?

You sound like you
swallowed a chimneysweep.

I'll handle it.

My name is Arthur Fry.
I'm with the BBC.

You probably notice my accent.
I was born in England, but I was raised

in the States, and my
American accent only comes out

when I'm tired, and I am knackered.

He's here to get his badger.

I'm sorry. My assistant's
not only Cockney,

she's also deaf.
I got it, Hermione.

Toodle-oo.

Arthur Fry.

- Success.
- I told you. My accent sold it.

I think it was that
he didn't speak English.

- Anyway, I got it.
- Had it. Sorry, Mike.

- You really should have seen that coming.
- I did.

- But, Mr. Henrys, how is it possible?
- Olympic magic, Nikolai.

Which kind?
Blood doping or bribery?

Identity theft.
Let's see how many interviews

I can get before I get caught.

You call that posture?
Let's go!

- Catwalk is 4/10 of your score.
- Believe me, I know what's at stake.

Just let me work.

Dad goes away to
Russia for a few weeks,

- and the whole family loses its mind.
- Tell me about it.

I was just saying the same thing
to the Admiral the other day.

Yeah, funny you should
mention the Admiral

because I think he's
about to ship off to sea.

- What are you talking about?
- I talked to the super recently,

and he said they've been
redoing the wiring down there.

I want to see you pop that hip
at the top of the eight.

- Can we take a break?
- Seriously?

Do you think that Megan cute shoes
is taking a break right now?

Stride! Stride!

- Stride!
- Okay, well, that explains

the flickering lights, but
what about the sensual groans?

They've been redoing the wiring
because the boiler's been acting up.

It's all pipes. Mystery solved!

- You're welcome.
- Oh.

Wow, what a relief it is to know

that nothing interesting's
happening to me.

Guess I'll just go back
to my regular apartment

someone was murdered in.
Thanks a lot, Ian.

Walk through the beat,
not on the beat!

I don't know what that means!

I'll tell you, I got some
great stuff out there today.

I'm so happy for you, Mr. Henrys.
But we should head out to the airport.

- Are you all set?
- I got my passport,

I got my boarding card,
I even took my belt off.

Have a great flight.
Take me with you!

- What?
- Nothing! I love Russia.

Mike Henry?
Mark Farrell from the Network.

Oh, Mark, if this is
about the gold pass...

We've been looking at your
coverage from the other day.

I got to tell you, we're impressed.

Yeah, well, when you
legitimately go out and cover

a story and follow the
rules, it all comes together.

Listen, a spot's opened up in our
coverage of the closing ceremonies.

I think you'd be perfect for it.

You'd have to extend your stay,
but it's national exposure.

What do you say?

Closing ceremonies?

That is amazing.
Of course you should stay.

Good. 'cause I
already told 'em I would.

- Again, Mike? Really?
- Mom, are we gonna practice or what?

Wait a minute.
You're helping her now?

I thought this was a battle of wills.

It was, but then
Eve actually got into it.

And so did I. I have to say, it's...
it's been pretty fun.

So I did miss something after all.

Oh, Mike, it's no big
production or anything.

- Just...
- can someone please help me

- put on my mascara?
- Is that my son in a dress?

- He's a stand-in for the competition.
- And I'm a judge. Thumbs down.

- I know it's not the
olympics or anything,

but I'm gonna do you proud, Dad.

I know you will.

- Ah, my eye!
- Honey, just hang on a sec.

I want to make sure she's okay.

- What... why does that even happen?
- I don't... okay, ow.

Hey, Mike. I'd like you
to meet your new producer.

Just give me a second.

I'm so sorry, Mike. One second.
Can we call you back?

Okay, miss Rodriguez-Jones,
it's time to head to the airport.

- No, she's staying.
- What do you mean?

Here I was on the verge of
a huge professional moment,

and all I could think of
was being with my family.

That's when I realized
Parkinson's hadn't made me miss things.

It had kept me from missing things.

Well, they told me they needed
someone for the closing ceremonies.

I told them you were
the person for the job.

- Yeah, right.
- Here's your gold pass.

- Seriously?
- Yeah, I know you

and I have had our differences
over the years, but this trip

has helped me to see that
there are bigger things in life

than just career pursuits and
petty squabbles over past...

She's gone. She's already gone!

Whoo! Gold pass!

Hey, we're about to go
to the pageant..

- You coming?
- Oh, you go ahead. I'll catch up.

Look, is this about before?
I should not have burst your bubble

- just to prove I was right.
- Ian, it's fine.

No, it's not fine.
I mean, who am I to judge?

You know, I was in a relationship
with a Swedish model for months online,

and then she turned out
to be my friend Dennis!

Not sure what was going
on with that, but...

- You're gonna be late.
- And you know what?

Even though there is no evidence at all,

who am I to say that ghosts don't exist?

- Leigh.
- What was that?

- You're all set.
- Oh, so soon?

I guess I could stall...
until it's time to get dinner.

Okay, I see what's going on here.
Well, I'll just get going.

- Sounds like a plan.
- Just gonna go. Bye...

Don't tell the Admiral.

Okay, judge two, kind of a creep.
Don't be afraid to use that.

Hey, Mom, I'm really glad
you pushed me to do something.

Honey, this is literally the last thing

that I thought we would be doing,
but I am really proud of you.

- What's that?
- Oh, sorry.

Old smile.
Won't happen again.

Thank you.
Go. Go, go, go.

Sir, I'm sorry, there's
no late admissions.

- NBC4 gold pass.
- What?

- Gold pass!
- Oh.

- Dad!
- Dad, you're here!

Yeah, I couldn't miss the
competitive event of the season.

I would say children
are the hope for the future

and our greatest resource.

All right, Eve!

And the new
Miss Outstanding Teen Manhattan is...

Evelyn Henry.

Evelyn! That's my daughter!

That's my daughter!

There she is.
There's my beauty queen.

Mike, you're supposed
to be in Russia!

Nah, that's all the way over in Russia.

Oh, my god, Dad,
I can't believe you came.

Ah, the olympics happen
every two to four years.

You in a tiara... almost never.

- Wasn't she amazing?
- Incredible.

Next stop: Miss
outstanding teen East Coast.

No. No, I just wanted to
beat them at their own game.

I'm out.

Eve, you can't quit!
We've got more bitches to beat!

- I shouldn't have said that.
- Not out loud, no.

When I was younger,
I had a road map for my life.

But it turns out getting lost
provided an opportunity.

And those are some of my favorite
moments from the 2014 winter olympics.

This is Mike Henry signing off
from Sochi, saying stay informed.

- Whoo!
- Nice job, Dad.

- That's awesome.
- 'Cause it brought me to where I needed to be.

- Are you sure you didn't want to stay?
- No, no, I'm sure Susan did a great job.

And it turns out she's not so bad.

That was a really touching
segment from Mike Henry.

This is Susan Rodriguez-Jones
filling in for Bob Costas,

who has food poisoning.

The woman's a monster.

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