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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:15,249 --> 00:00:16,550 When was it? 2 00:00:17,050 --> 00:00:19,319 When I first started thinkin' about killing my wife... 3 00:00:21,889 --> 00:00:24,057 For those of you who've never killed anyone... 4 00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:26,059 Yes you! 5 00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:29,730 You people peacefully watching 6 00:00:30,097 --> 00:00:32,065 You'll never get your mind around it. 7 00:00:34,268 --> 00:00:39,740 For you, snuffing out somebody's life is almost 100% unbelievable. 8 00:00:41,942 --> 00:00:48,081 For us killing folk, not whacking someone is almost 100% unbelievable. 9 00:00:48,749 --> 00:00:50,417 Almost... 10 00:07:07,494 --> 00:07:09,696 Oh... that feels good. Yeah... 11 00:07:09,997 --> 00:07:11,832 Yeah... I'm... 12 00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:12,900 I'm com... 13 00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:14,561 A CM about a guy who's quick in bed. 14 00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:16,864 He comes in 3 secs. 15 00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:20,200 Yoko's Thought Up Commercial 16 00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:50,664 Mind Blowingly Quick. 17 00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:53,066 For Fast Internet Access, Get SPEED! 18 00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:04,511 Something wrong? 19 00:09:06,113 --> 00:09:07,981 Nothing really. 20 00:09:18,525 --> 00:09:22,095 Yoko, are any commercials you made on lately? 21 00:09:22,196 --> 00:09:23,130 Maybe. 22 00:09:23,630 --> 00:09:25,332 Maybe that beer one? 23 00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:28,702 Like those pro wrestling Amazon women? 24 00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:29,870 You got me. 25 00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:31,271 I knew it. 26 00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:33,207 I thought so. 27 00:09:34,508 --> 00:09:35,442 Why's that? 28 00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:36,710 It's a yawn. 29 00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:38,645 Really? 30 00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:40,981 So boring I almost barfed. 31 00:09:46,053 --> 00:09:48,989 What? You angry? You're pissed. 32 00:09:49,323 --> 00:09:50,991 Not at all... 33 00:09:51,291 --> 00:09:54,394 My honest opinion is valuable, huh? 34 00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:56,497 It's useful, right? 35 00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:58,966 But that one's really boring. 36 00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:03,837 My CMs have a certain love-hate factor. 37 00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:05,372 Certainly not. 38 00:10:05,506 --> 00:10:07,875 The entire country hates it. 39 00:10:08,175 --> 00:10:10,143 Not necessarily. 40 00:10:10,244 --> 00:10:11,678 I almost forgot. 41 00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:13,046 What? 42 00:10:13,180 --> 00:10:14,815 You trying to kill me? 43 00:10:20,854 --> 00:10:23,190 How'd you figure me out? 44 00:10:25,192 --> 00:10:26,360 Yoko... 45 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,696 your armpits reek. 46 00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:32,866 I gotta hold my breath to keep from dying. 47 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:37,004 If I die, we're talking homicide. 48 00:10:43,043 --> 00:10:46,346 Say it backwards, you get REDRUM. 49 00:10:50,217 --> 00:10:53,687 You see "The Shining"? 50 00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:59,226 Killer armpit stench... 51 00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:01,528 You could use the idea. 52 00:11:01,628 --> 00:11:03,430 You can use it in your CMs. 53 00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:07,401 Maybe I've got a flair for commercial planning. 54 00:11:07,568 --> 00:11:09,703 Well? 55 00:11:09,903 --> 00:11:13,106 Being a copy writer is a breeze. 56 00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:14,708 Anybody can do it. 57 00:11:22,649 --> 00:11:23,984 My gut... 58 00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:30,824 All right. 59 00:11:34,728 --> 00:11:36,063 That was a breeze. 60 00:11:36,163 --> 00:11:38,232 That house wasn't even locked. 61 00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:39,566 Amazing. 62 00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:41,468 How'd we make out? 63 00:11:41,635 --> 00:11:42,336 Hold on. 64 00:11:42,503 --> 00:11:48,509 Ta-da! 1, 2, 3... 200,000 yen or so. 65 00:11:48,775 --> 00:11:49,476 200,000 yen! 66 00:11:52,112 --> 00:11:53,780 Hey, what's next? 67 00:11:53,981 --> 00:11:56,250 Some ladies of the evening? 68 00:11:56,350 --> 00:11:57,284 Feelin' fine time? 69 00:11:57,518 --> 00:11:58,619 Feelin' fine time? 70 00:12:09,263 --> 00:12:11,832 When you're, you know, which hand? 71 00:12:11,999 --> 00:12:12,699 When jacking off? 72 00:12:14,701 --> 00:12:17,504 Me... my right hand. 73 00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:20,207 I wonder. Which one was it? 74 00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:21,441 Look out! 75 00:12:21,708 --> 00:12:23,844 Don't check your package! Hands at 10 and 2!! 76 00:12:23,977 --> 00:12:24,978 S-s-sorry. Sorry. 77 00:12:25,145 --> 00:12:26,280 You scared me. 78 00:12:26,380 --> 00:12:29,516 I can come without using my hands. 79 00:12:30,684 --> 00:12:33,220 What the hell? How? 80 00:12:33,687 --> 00:12:36,323 With this. Concentration. 81 00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,192 Image! 82 00:12:40,027 --> 00:12:41,195 Get real! 83 00:12:41,495 --> 00:12:42,329 Seriously! 84 00:12:42,496 --> 00:12:43,063 Seriously? 85 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,966 Talking God's realm. 86 00:12:46,834 --> 00:12:48,068 You're so money, J. 87 00:12:48,235 --> 00:12:49,970 Realm of the senses. 88 00:12:53,640 --> 00:12:54,808 That, I'd like to see. 89 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,591 Keep your eyes on the road. 90 00:13:10,724 --> 00:13:11,725 S-s-sorry. Sorry. 91 00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:06,213 We're approaching Narita. Would you mind putting your seats upright? 92 00:14:19,393 --> 00:14:22,229 Oi. Come back here. 93 00:14:26,767 --> 00:14:29,102 What is your function here? 94 00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:32,272 Me? 95 00:14:34,508 --> 00:14:37,477 I'm the cabin attendant so... 96 00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:45,786 I make sure you passengers have a pleasant and safe flight. I guess. 97 00:14:50,524 --> 00:14:54,428 That's not what I mean. What is your purpose for living? 98 00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,763 What are you doing? 99 00:14:56,864 --> 00:15:00,934 What is your function on this planet? 100 00:15:02,035 --> 00:15:09,276 I'm terribly sorry... That's very hard, how should I answer? 101 00:15:14,715 --> 00:15:17,217 There's no need to think hard about it! 102 00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:22,890 You'll get the wrong answer. Simply answer. 103 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,958 Follow your instincts and answer. 104 00:15:25,292 --> 00:15:26,793 Even if I... 105 00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:32,833 10, 9, 8, 7, 6... 106 00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:37,971 But if, for example, you were me, how would you... 107 00:15:46,847 --> 00:15:49,917 Don't ask me! Don't be poking into my affairs! 108 00:15:50,184 --> 00:15:51,185 What are you? 109 00:15:51,552 --> 00:15:54,822 My fucking mother? There's no way you are! 110 00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:57,157 What am I, your son? 111 00:15:57,391 --> 00:15:59,393 I don't think so. What's with you! 112 00:15:59,593 --> 00:16:00,694 You messed up in the head? 113 00:16:02,896 --> 00:16:04,531 You ugly bitch!! 114 00:16:05,199 --> 00:16:06,834 Receipt 115 00:16:26,386 --> 00:16:27,387 I'm home. 116 00:16:32,459 --> 00:16:33,861 Welcome home, Daddy. 117 00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:36,363 Keiichi, are you still up? 118 00:16:36,530 --> 00:16:37,130 Yep. 119 00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:39,800 Another late day, huh? 120 00:16:39,967 --> 00:16:41,969 How'd it go? 121 00:16:42,135 --> 00:16:43,203 How'd what go? 122 00:16:43,904 --> 00:16:45,906 The Aoyama tickets... The hypnotist. 123 00:16:46,073 --> 00:16:47,708 Oh, I forgot. 124 00:16:47,975 --> 00:16:48,909 You forgot! 125 00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:51,044 No, I didn't forget, I... 126 00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:52,379 What? Which is it? 127 00:16:52,546 --> 00:16:53,881 Ta-da! 128 00:16:54,381 --> 00:16:55,549 No way. 129 00:16:55,716 --> 00:16:56,450 Yes way. 130 00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:58,385 Way to go, Daddy. 131 00:16:58,452 --> 00:17:00,154 Were they hard to buy? 132 00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:01,421 Of course they were. 133 00:17:01,588 --> 00:17:03,590 His show is way popular. 134 00:17:04,091 --> 00:17:07,094 They say he hypnotizes the entire audience. 135 00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:07,895 Really? 136 00:17:08,095 --> 00:17:08,829 You know Kanako, she... 137 00:17:08,962 --> 00:17:10,631 No, I don't know her. 138 00:17:10,764 --> 00:17:12,399 I was talking to Mom. 139 00:17:12,633 --> 00:17:13,267 Kana-chan? 140 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,402 Kanako said before she went... 141 00:17:15,636 --> 00:17:20,240 She thought it was fake. Now she's a hard-core Aoyama fan. 142 00:17:20,474 --> 00:17:22,109 Aoyama's big, huh? 143 00:17:22,276 --> 00:17:24,478 He's tall and good looking. 144 00:17:24,611 --> 00:17:26,413 I'm pretty tall myself. 145 00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:27,948 When is it? 146 00:17:28,282 --> 00:17:29,416 Tomorrow. 147 00:17:29,950 --> 00:17:31,018 We are so there. 148 00:17:31,151 --> 00:17:33,453 You've got cram school, remember? 149 00:17:34,688 --> 00:17:35,856 Maybe I do, maybe I don't. 150 00:17:36,123 --> 00:17:38,025 No maybes about it. 151 00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:40,427 Besides, I'll never get into college. 152 00:17:40,627 --> 00:17:43,363 Stop it. You and your attitude is... 153 00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:44,665 School... 154 00:17:45,132 --> 00:17:45,999 Yes? 155 00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:47,134 Forget school. 156 00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:48,702 All right! 157 00:17:48,869 --> 00:17:50,637 Hold on honey! 158 00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:52,272 That's no example for our kids. 159 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:57,311 Come on. I worked my butt off to get these tickets. 160 00:17:57,478 --> 00:17:58,679 But... 161 00:17:58,979 --> 00:17:59,947 Let's play hooky! 162 00:18:04,218 --> 00:18:05,886 OK. Who's in? 163 00:18:06,186 --> 00:18:07,888 Yippee! 164 00:18:07,988 --> 00:18:09,990 Sometimes the kids need to relax. 165 00:18:10,057 --> 00:18:11,225 What a wise father. 166 00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:13,560 Thanks Daddy. 167 00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:15,629 Thanks Daddy. 168 00:18:18,232 --> 00:18:20,133 Didn't they cost big money? 169 00:18:20,367 --> 00:18:21,235 Not really. 170 00:18:21,535 --> 00:18:25,572 The president of one of my big clients, you know, Mr. Saito. 171 00:18:25,706 --> 00:18:29,643 You met him. Remember? 172 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:31,645 Nope. Not at all. 173 00:18:32,412 --> 00:18:33,180 Anyway... 174 00:18:33,347 --> 00:18:40,387 He's got friends in show biz and he said he owed me. 175 00:18:40,654 --> 00:18:44,158 It's my account and I should give him something but... 176 00:18:45,025 --> 00:18:49,663 These premium tickets scalp for 100,000 yen. 177 00:18:50,164 --> 00:18:51,231 Wow. 178 00:18:51,532 --> 00:18:52,533 Sell? 179 00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:54,568 Shall we sell them? 180 00:18:55,369 --> 00:18:58,672 What's with that face? Stop it. 181 00:18:59,072 --> 00:18:59,840 Let's sell. 182 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:01,875 To sell or not to sell. 183 00:19:04,044 --> 00:19:05,379 That is the question. 184 00:29:29,837 --> 00:29:36,210 And now, the Non-Non pain relief medicine commercial for your viewing. 185 00:29:37,010 --> 00:29:39,012 We're most happy with the work. 186 00:29:39,379 --> 00:29:41,648 You'll be more than pleased. 187 00:29:49,356 --> 00:29:51,692 You have a phone call. 188 00:29:51,992 --> 00:29:53,026 Tell them to wait. 189 00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:55,162 It's your wife and it's urgent... 190 00:29:58,165 --> 00:29:59,099 Yeah. Yeah. 191 00:30:02,169 --> 00:30:02,903 What? 192 00:30:04,004 --> 00:30:05,873 The bathroom light is out? 193 00:30:11,578 --> 00:30:12,613 How's it coming, J? 194 00:30:12,779 --> 00:30:13,747 Like clockwork. 195 00:30:14,248 --> 00:30:15,516 You're so money, J. 196 00:30:21,255 --> 00:30:23,357 I gotta get a job soon. 197 00:30:23,457 --> 00:30:25,893 What's wrong with this job? 198 00:30:26,026 --> 00:30:27,761 There's plenty wrong with it. 199 00:30:30,197 --> 00:30:33,433 Maybe... Like what do you wanna do? 200 00:30:33,867 --> 00:30:34,768 Like what? 201 00:30:34,935 --> 00:30:39,573 Wanna do? I have something I wanna do. 202 00:30:45,312 --> 00:30:45,979 Jesus... 203 00:30:46,113 --> 00:30:46,980 Off! Idiot! 204 00:30:47,114 --> 00:30:47,815 My bad. 205 00:30:47,948 --> 00:30:49,049 It's Kawaguchi. 206 00:30:49,983 --> 00:30:50,717 Hello? 207 00:30:50,884 --> 00:30:53,554 Yes... No, no, no, no. 208 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,389 Now, I'm, you know... 209 00:30:55,556 --> 00:30:57,658 No, you know, I'm tied up so... 210 00:30:57,825 --> 00:31:03,630 Yeah, well... Don't ask me... 211 00:31:05,098 --> 00:31:08,635 OK. I'll pick something up on my way home. 212 00:31:18,278 --> 00:31:20,113 Shall we take a look? 213 00:31:21,748 --> 00:31:22,783 Okay then? 214 00:31:23,617 --> 00:31:24,985 Please enjoy. 215 00:31:30,257 --> 00:31:30,991 Oh no... 216 00:31:31,125 --> 00:31:34,161 The biggest audition of my life and I've got a splitting headache... 217 00:31:34,294 --> 00:31:35,329 Next. 218 00:31:35,596 --> 00:31:36,130 Yes. 219 00:31:37,631 --> 00:31:38,932 Can you dance 220 00:31:39,099 --> 00:31:39,867 Yes. 221 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,503 Let's dance. Dance with me. Dance. 222 00:31:42,636 --> 00:31:43,637 Here's the music. OK. 223 00:31:43,804 --> 00:31:45,439 And now. Music. 224 00:31:47,975 --> 00:31:50,477 More, more. Harder. Harder. 225 00:31:50,677 --> 00:31:51,512 Harder. 226 00:31:51,645 --> 00:31:52,880 Harder. Yeah! 227 00:31:55,048 --> 00:31:57,117 You can do better. 228 00:31:57,818 --> 00:31:59,686 Harder, harder. 229 00:32:00,020 --> 00:32:01,021 Faster. 230 00:32:01,321 --> 00:32:02,289 Harder! 231 00:32:02,356 --> 00:32:04,224 More, more. 232 00:32:04,558 --> 00:32:06,293 Non-Non for Headaches. 233 00:32:27,681 --> 00:32:30,818 It's not even close to what we asked for. 234 00:32:31,084 --> 00:32:36,190 And now the if-l-can't-hypnotize-you you-win-1-million-yen contest. 235 00:32:48,669 --> 00:32:52,940 And who will the challenger from the audience be this time? 236 00:32:55,275 --> 00:32:56,743 Now... 237 00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:04,852 who's it gonna be... 238 00:33:16,063 --> 00:33:17,798 I broke a sweat. 239 00:33:18,899 --> 00:33:25,372 How about that father in the grey suit there? 240 00:33:26,974 --> 00:33:27,774 No way? 241 00:33:27,941 --> 00:33:28,742 For real? 242 00:33:52,266 --> 00:33:54,635 We never authorized this. 243 00:33:54,968 --> 00:33:56,804 This is more entertaining. 244 00:33:57,337 --> 00:34:00,841 I never said "make it entertaining". 245 00:34:00,974 --> 00:34:04,178 Customers won't understand the functionality of our product. 246 00:34:04,278 --> 00:34:05,445 Well spoken! 247 00:34:05,612 --> 00:34:06,747 It's aspirin, right? 248 00:34:06,947 --> 00:34:09,750 Does it have any other function than relieving headaches? 249 00:34:09,850 --> 00:34:13,120 It has various components. 250 00:34:13,253 --> 00:34:15,189 Like what? For example? 251 00:34:15,589 --> 00:34:17,791 For example, like... 252 00:34:17,925 --> 00:34:22,763 Whatchamacallit pie ring... What's the name again? 253 00:34:22,863 --> 00:34:23,630 Isopropylantipyrine. 254 00:34:23,797 --> 00:34:25,365 See. Pro, pro, propylanti... 255 00:34:25,532 --> 00:34:27,701 If you don't understand... 256 00:34:27,968 --> 00:34:31,538 the customer will get lost in the technobabble. 257 00:34:32,539 --> 00:34:37,110 Commercials must be entertaining. Otherwise, no one will watch. 258 00:34:37,478 --> 00:34:40,481 Simple one-sided, corporate masturbation is... 259 00:34:42,149 --> 00:34:43,784 Masturbation? 260 00:34:45,152 --> 00:34:47,020 We're the ones sporting the bill. 261 00:34:47,988 --> 00:34:52,292 Then you're wasting your money on boring commercials. 262 00:34:57,231 --> 00:34:59,166 President, the phone. 263 00:34:59,666 --> 00:35:00,501 I said "no calls!" 264 00:35:00,701 --> 00:35:03,070 It's your wife and it's urgent... 265 00:35:05,005 --> 00:35:05,906 Yeah. Yeah. 266 00:35:09,343 --> 00:35:11,378 60 or 100 watt? 267 00:35:12,412 --> 00:35:16,717 I told you I haven't the faintest... 268 00:35:17,384 --> 00:35:20,387 Anyway... Take a look... 269 00:35:21,255 --> 00:35:23,724 What? You can't reach it? 270 00:35:24,191 --> 00:35:28,862 So pull a chair over there... That a girl... 271 00:35:29,029 --> 00:35:30,831 You think I'm smart? 272 00:35:32,232 --> 00:35:35,235 Is this place Poorsville or what? 273 00:35:35,369 --> 00:35:39,373 That's why I said the house next door was better. 274 00:35:39,540 --> 00:35:41,575 They're all the same. 275 00:35:42,876 --> 00:35:44,878 Shirogane is the place. 276 00:35:45,379 --> 00:35:46,747 We're here so... 277 00:35:47,214 --> 00:35:50,851 You said we'd score here, limp dick! 278 00:35:50,951 --> 00:35:52,553 I never said that. 279 00:35:52,686 --> 00:35:53,687 Did so. 280 00:35:53,787 --> 00:35:54,855 No man, I didn't. 281 00:35:54,955 --> 00:35:56,457 Ouch! Stop it. 282 00:35:56,623 --> 00:35:57,624 My, my, my balls! 283 00:35:59,293 --> 00:36:02,629 Ouch! You're crushing my ribs. 284 00:36:02,763 --> 00:36:03,864 My ribs... 285 00:36:05,265 --> 00:36:06,233 Morishita? 286 00:36:08,035 --> 00:36:10,804 What, what? 287 00:36:11,638 --> 00:36:12,406 What's with you? 288 00:36:12,573 --> 00:36:13,707 Keep your voice down. 289 00:36:14,074 --> 00:36:15,075 Playing cards. 290 00:36:15,642 --> 00:36:16,410 Cards? 291 00:36:16,543 --> 00:36:19,480 Screaming over cards. Are you a kid or what? 292 00:36:19,746 --> 00:36:21,381 Let's play a hand. 293 00:36:21,482 --> 00:36:24,251 We ain't playing cards. What's with you? 294 00:36:24,418 --> 00:36:25,586 I dig cards. 295 00:36:25,719 --> 00:36:27,488 Don't you start too. 296 00:36:34,428 --> 00:36:36,130 Owch! 297 00:37:15,636 --> 00:37:18,005 May I have your name sir? 298 00:37:19,106 --> 00:37:20,174 Kobayashi. 299 00:37:20,374 --> 00:37:25,512 Mr. Kobayashi. What a wonderful, loving family you have. 300 00:37:25,712 --> 00:37:30,384 A beautiful daughter, handsome son and kind, loving wife. 301 00:37:32,019 --> 00:37:33,954 But we're broke. 302 00:37:34,721 --> 00:37:36,056 Butt out. 303 00:37:41,161 --> 00:37:44,465 Mr. Not-a-dime-to-your-name Kobayashi. 304 00:37:44,631 --> 00:37:46,066 I've got more than a dime. 305 00:37:51,872 --> 00:37:57,344 Mr. More-than-a-dime-to-your-name Kobayashi, it's challenge time. 306 00:37:57,478 --> 00:38:00,414 Please have a seat. 307 00:38:51,231 --> 00:38:54,768 Now I'm going to hypnotize you. 308 00:38:56,069 --> 00:39:04,444 If I fail, the 1 million yen is yours, Mr. Kobayashi. 309 00:39:04,878 --> 00:39:05,712 Okay. 310 00:39:07,614 --> 00:39:09,049 Here we go. 311 00:39:11,552 --> 00:39:18,392 Under my spell, you will become a bird. Please look at my finger. 312 00:39:19,226 --> 00:39:20,727 Do I have to? 313 00:39:25,899 --> 00:39:29,102 Closing your eyes or... 314 00:39:29,436 --> 00:39:34,107 not doing what I say is against the rules. 315 00:39:34,441 --> 00:39:35,442 Sorry. 316 00:39:36,844 --> 00:39:41,415 Now, look at my finger. 317 00:39:42,616 --> 00:39:47,287 On the count of three, you will become a bird. 318 00:40:36,203 --> 00:40:37,171 Mr. Kobayashi? 319 00:40:43,010 --> 00:40:43,811 Daddy? 320 00:40:57,991 --> 00:40:59,827 We won! 321 00:40:59,927 --> 00:41:00,828 1 million yen! 322 00:41:00,994 --> 00:41:01,829 No way? 323 00:41:54,114 --> 00:41:54,882 Evening! 324 00:41:55,649 --> 00:41:58,418 Who, who, who, are you? 325 00:42:01,388 --> 00:42:03,557 What is your function in life? 326 00:42:06,326 --> 00:42:08,929 Making chicks come. 327 00:42:11,665 --> 00:42:14,434 Just kidding! I'm a hypnotist. 328 00:42:24,511 --> 00:42:25,846 Otherwise, useless. 329 00:42:27,781 --> 00:42:31,251 You... hurt my feelings. 330 00:42:40,461 --> 00:42:42,663 Did you say 'sayonara' to your momma? 331 00:42:42,930 --> 00:42:43,697 What? 332 00:42:44,364 --> 00:42:46,266 Did you say 'sayonara' to your momma? 333 00:43:13,961 --> 00:43:15,829 That feels good. 334 00:43:22,336 --> 00:43:23,303 One more. 335 00:43:36,683 --> 00:43:39,353 My dad's still a bird! 336 00:43:39,686 --> 00:43:41,588 Undo the hypnotism! 337 00:43:42,856 --> 00:43:44,358 I can't... Sorry... 338 00:43:44,525 --> 00:43:45,559 Hey! 339 00:44:08,849 --> 00:44:11,585 Yoko, why are you looking at your watch? 340 00:44:11,718 --> 00:44:17,090 No reason... What gives with that president? 341 00:44:17,257 --> 00:44:18,025 Hmm. 342 00:44:18,192 --> 00:44:21,295 Don't 'hmm' me. So it's rejected? 343 00:44:21,728 --> 00:44:22,529 Yep. 344 00:44:22,629 --> 00:44:24,264 Don't 'yep' me. 345 00:44:24,398 --> 00:44:25,799 What're you gonna do? 346 00:44:26,467 --> 00:44:29,236 Maybe change it a bit. 347 00:44:29,369 --> 00:44:30,938 Change what part? 348 00:44:31,538 --> 00:44:36,543 Maybe bring the joke factor down. 349 00:44:36,910 --> 00:44:39,880 Make the product easier to understand. 350 00:44:40,047 --> 00:44:40,814 I'm out. 351 00:44:41,448 --> 00:44:42,216 Huh? 352 00:44:42,382 --> 00:44:43,817 You change it, I'm out. 353 00:44:44,251 --> 00:44:45,285 How selfish. 354 00:44:45,419 --> 00:44:47,821 What's selfish about it? 355 00:44:48,088 --> 00:44:49,723 I mean it's selfish of them to... 356 00:44:49,790 --> 00:44:50,557 I'm getting out. 357 00:44:50,824 --> 00:44:51,925 Come on, Yoko. 358 00:44:52,059 --> 00:44:53,393 Out of the cab. 359 00:44:53,827 --> 00:44:56,063 Driver, let me off here. 360 00:44:56,330 --> 00:44:57,764 Yoko, wait... 361 00:44:58,098 --> 00:44:59,233 Hurry up. 362 00:44:59,833 --> 00:45:01,168 Stop and open the door. 363 00:45:01,268 --> 00:45:03,103 OK, OK... Move. 364 00:45:03,437 --> 00:45:04,772 Hurry up. 365 00:45:08,609 --> 00:45:09,743 Yoko. 366 00:45:11,278 --> 00:45:15,816 I won't change it. If they hate it, get someone else. 367 00:45:16,116 --> 00:45:19,419 And another thing, don't call me by my first name. 368 00:45:19,787 --> 00:45:20,587 Okay. 369 00:45:23,590 --> 00:45:25,092 Ready... go! 370 00:45:35,636 --> 00:45:36,937 I'm beat. 371 00:45:38,138 --> 00:45:39,306 Yippie! 372 00:45:39,540 --> 00:45:42,810 You suck! Damnit! 373 00:45:42,943 --> 00:45:43,644 Again. 374 00:45:43,777 --> 00:45:44,344 Okay. 375 00:45:44,478 --> 00:45:45,813 One more. 376 00:45:45,979 --> 00:45:46,814 Ready... go. 377 00:45:52,486 --> 00:45:53,687 Morishita! 378 00:45:54,488 --> 00:45:56,156 Why the J? 379 00:45:56,723 --> 00:45:57,958 No reason. 380 00:45:58,392 --> 00:45:59,126 Oh? 381 00:46:03,730 --> 00:46:05,632 Somebody's home! 382 00:46:05,732 --> 00:46:06,667 This is bad. 383 00:46:09,036 --> 00:46:11,038 J! J! J! 384 00:46:17,044 --> 00:46:20,013 J, you smell good. 385 00:46:37,531 --> 00:46:39,099 Call the hospital! 386 00:46:39,199 --> 00:46:41,068 What hospital? 387 00:46:41,201 --> 00:46:43,604 Anywhere. Just hurry! 388 00:46:45,706 --> 00:46:47,107 Daddy? 389 00:46:48,442 --> 00:46:50,077 Where's Daddy? 390 00:46:50,677 --> 00:46:51,745 Daddy? 391 00:46:53,247 --> 00:46:54,681 Daddy's gone. 392 00:47:08,195 --> 00:47:10,364 Daddy, come here. 393 00:47:11,532 --> 00:47:13,433 This way. 394 00:51:20,214 --> 00:51:22,616 Shouldn't he go to work? 395 00:51:25,152 --> 00:51:26,553 How could he? 396 00:51:27,020 --> 00:51:28,489 I'll worry about dad. 397 00:51:29,656 --> 00:51:30,691 Okay. 398 00:51:34,661 --> 00:51:36,697 Don't tell anyone at school. 399 00:51:37,030 --> 00:51:38,732 Like I would. 400 00:53:08,255 --> 00:53:10,624 What is your function in life? 401 00:53:11,058 --> 00:53:12,226 I have none. 402 00:53:21,769 --> 00:53:23,170 So who's the hit man? 403 00:53:29,443 --> 00:53:30,744 Don't be asking me questions! 404 00:53:31,111 --> 00:53:32,279 Don't be poking into my affairs! 405 00:53:32,679 --> 00:53:35,949 Isn't it pretty damn obvious? Does he look like a hit man? 406 00:53:36,116 --> 00:53:39,353 Does this boring fuck look like a killer? 407 00:53:39,953 --> 00:53:43,257 That's me, by the way. 408 00:53:45,159 --> 00:53:49,163 If he could get the job done, why the fuck would I fly here? 409 00:53:49,797 --> 00:53:51,365 Figure it out man. 410 00:53:51,498 --> 00:53:53,667 Don't ask me questions, you asshole! 411 00:53:53,967 --> 00:53:56,837 Keep it up and I'll hit you. 412 00:53:57,337 --> 00:53:58,539 I'll whack you. 413 00:53:58,972 --> 00:54:02,543 I'll hit you and kick you. And hit you and kick you again. 414 00:54:03,110 --> 00:54:05,145 I'll kick you in the balls. 415 00:54:05,646 --> 00:54:10,284 I'll grease you asshole. 416 00:54:10,617 --> 00:54:11,952 Did he say all that? 417 00:54:12,786 --> 00:54:17,624 Like you'd know? You don't even speak English! 418 00:54:19,660 --> 00:54:20,661 How much? 419 00:54:30,504 --> 00:54:32,306 How much? 420 00:54:33,474 --> 00:54:34,341 1 million yen. 421 00:54:34,842 --> 00:54:35,542 Done. 422 00:54:37,344 --> 00:54:39,580 But no punk gangsters. 423 00:54:40,514 --> 00:54:41,748 Punk gangster? 424 00:54:42,182 --> 00:54:47,488 Lately, when I make TV commercials I team up with overseas directors. 425 00:54:47,688 --> 00:54:51,158 I think their level is high. 426 00:54:51,859 --> 00:54:52,826 Level... 427 00:54:53,026 --> 00:54:55,562 Of professionalism. High but worth it. 428 00:54:56,029 --> 00:54:56,830 High... 429 00:54:57,030 --> 00:54:57,998 Quite. 430 00:54:58,766 --> 00:55:01,535 Get a foreign hit man. 431 00:55:03,036 --> 00:55:03,871 Foreign... 432 00:55:04,171 --> 00:55:07,608 You're the coordinator, so get coordinating. 433 00:55:08,041 --> 00:55:09,777 I'm paying enough. 434 00:55:11,078 --> 00:55:12,045 Can you do it? 435 00:55:12,780 --> 00:55:13,680 Do my best. 436 00:55:14,181 --> 00:55:17,584 Damn straight you will. 437 00:55:18,218 --> 00:55:19,286 Damn straight. 438 00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:21,288 I want results. 439 00:55:21,588 --> 00:55:22,923 Results... 440 00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:29,596 Do... him. 441 00:55:30,130 --> 00:55:31,532 I'll do him. 442 00:55:39,206 --> 00:55:40,307 How much? 443 00:55:46,213 --> 00:55:47,314 1 million yen. 444 00:55:47,781 --> 00:55:51,819 1 million yen. That's high. 445 00:55:51,985 --> 00:55:54,321 But he's a foreigner. 446 00:55:54,488 --> 00:55:55,222 So... 447 00:55:55,389 --> 00:55:59,626 So I brought him all the way from London. 448 00:55:59,793 --> 00:56:02,262 That ain't no reason. 449 00:56:03,597 --> 00:56:04,965 1 million, huh? 450 00:56:05,933 --> 00:56:07,734 Fuck it. Sorry. 451 00:56:09,670 --> 00:56:12,239 Can you hold on a minute? 452 00:56:16,610 --> 00:56:19,446 I'll cut you a deal. Please name your price. 453 00:56:19,913 --> 00:56:20,848 10,000 yen. 454 00:56:27,754 --> 00:56:28,989 He accepts. 455 00:56:29,123 --> 00:56:29,957 You sure? 456 00:56:52,479 --> 00:56:53,447 What's with that? 457 00:56:55,349 --> 00:56:57,785 I got attacked by a crow. 458 00:56:58,152 --> 00:56:59,319 A bird did that? 459 00:57:00,521 --> 00:57:01,288 Yeah. 460 00:57:02,356 --> 00:57:03,390 Did it hurt? 461 00:57:05,959 --> 00:57:09,863 Not much. Maybe I'm going overboard. 462 00:57:11,665 --> 00:57:12,966 You're bleeding. 463 00:57:14,668 --> 00:57:17,471 Crow beaks are sharp. 464 00:57:24,878 --> 00:57:26,346 Scary, huh? 465 00:57:26,513 --> 00:57:28,348 Pretty scary. 466 00:57:38,192 --> 00:57:39,526 Hypnotist Murdered! 467 00:57:50,871 --> 00:57:51,772 Welcome. 468 00:57:55,709 --> 00:57:56,610 Pako noodles. 469 00:57:58,278 --> 00:58:01,682 One order of pako noodles, right? 470 00:58:01,782 --> 00:58:02,583 Yes. 471 00:58:02,783 --> 00:58:03,717 Thank you. 472 00:58:05,452 --> 00:58:06,386 I love 'em. 473 00:58:07,421 --> 00:58:08,222 Huh? 474 00:58:09,623 --> 00:58:10,691 Pako noodles. 475 00:58:13,794 --> 00:58:14,928 Good choice. 476 00:58:43,924 --> 00:58:49,062 A person with a right side up and upside down face. 477 00:58:49,630 --> 00:58:52,166 The two faces fight. 478 00:58:53,834 --> 00:58:55,769 Yoko's Thought Up Commercial 479 00:58:58,272 --> 00:59:00,107 Italian burger meal. 480 00:59:00,240 --> 00:59:01,742 Stop selfishly ordering, asshole. 481 00:59:01,909 --> 00:59:03,076 Get the pako noodles, asshole. 482 00:59:03,243 --> 00:59:05,012 You had them yesterday. 483 00:59:05,145 --> 00:59:07,181 What's wrong with pako noodles? 484 00:59:07,347 --> 00:59:09,016 I wanna eat 'em everyday. 485 00:59:09,149 --> 00:59:10,451 You'll get sick of them. 486 00:59:10,617 --> 00:59:12,086 No I won't! 487 00:59:12,186 --> 00:59:14,521 Well, you listen to Ken Hirai everyday. 488 00:59:14,655 --> 00:59:15,756 I like Ken Hirai. 489 00:59:15,856 --> 00:59:17,591 Well I like pako noodles. 490 00:59:17,758 --> 00:59:19,593 Don't compare them to Ken Hirai. 491 00:59:19,760 --> 00:59:20,594 Same thing. 492 00:59:20,761 --> 00:59:21,628 No, it's not. 493 00:59:21,795 --> 00:59:23,030 Same thing, asshole! 494 00:59:23,163 --> 00:59:25,632 So they're the same. You got me. 495 00:59:34,641 --> 00:59:36,710 Now that's funny! I'll make a series. 496 00:59:36,877 --> 00:59:38,812 Yoko's Thought Up Commercial 497 00:59:41,115 --> 00:59:42,616 Rice or bread? 498 00:59:42,816 --> 00:59:43,684 Rice. Rice! 499 00:59:43,817 --> 00:59:44,651 Bread. 500 00:59:44,785 --> 00:59:46,820 Is bread all your face can eat? 501 00:59:46,954 --> 00:59:48,388 Leave my face out of it. 502 00:59:48,489 --> 00:59:50,023 Rice for me, honey. 503 00:59:50,157 --> 00:59:50,858 Rice, right? 504 00:59:50,991 --> 00:59:51,492 Bread. 505 00:59:51,625 --> 00:59:52,526 Stop it. 506 00:59:52,659 --> 00:59:53,627 You stop it. 507 00:59:53,727 --> 00:59:54,361 What the hell! 508 00:59:54,495 --> 00:59:55,863 Don't order me around. 509 00:59:55,996 --> 00:59:58,065 Whatta ya think of the music biz? 510 00:59:58,165 --> 01:00:01,168 Who cares! We're not talking about that. 511 01:00:01,235 --> 01:00:03,804 We never talk anyone. 512 01:00:03,904 --> 01:00:06,306 We're talking about rice or bread. 513 01:00:06,406 --> 01:00:07,341 Bread for me! 514 01:00:07,474 --> 01:00:08,842 What! 515 01:00:47,948 --> 01:00:50,217 What is your function in life? 516 01:01:14,274 --> 01:01:15,209 Hey uhhh... 517 01:01:22,916 --> 01:01:24,051 Can I get a light? 518 01:01:49,443 --> 01:01:51,678 Not from 'round here, are you? 519 01:01:53,914 --> 01:01:56,183 Nobody 'round here comes down this street. 520 01:01:59,486 --> 01:02:00,621 You know why? 521 01:02:01,455 --> 01:02:02,256 No. 522 01:02:02,456 --> 01:02:03,791 Wanna know why? 523 01:02:05,759 --> 01:02:07,194 'Cuz it's haunted. 524 01:02:09,797 --> 01:02:11,632 The ghost's a cop. 525 01:02:13,967 --> 01:02:16,003 Rides a patrol bike. 526 01:02:18,305 --> 01:02:20,774 Gets close and asks for a light. 527 01:02:21,809 --> 01:02:26,780 If you give it to him, you're done for. 528 01:02:30,384 --> 01:02:32,619 I'm kidding man! 529 01:02:33,654 --> 01:02:36,190 I had you huh? 530 01:02:36,356 --> 01:02:40,327 Hook, line and sinker. 531 01:02:40,494 --> 01:02:41,728 Huh? What? 532 01:02:41,829 --> 01:02:42,796 Light. 533 01:02:42,896 --> 01:02:43,664 Light? 534 01:02:43,831 --> 01:02:44,498 My lighter. 535 01:02:44,665 --> 01:02:45,899 Oh, your lighter. 536 01:02:48,669 --> 01:02:51,004 I had you huh? Hook, line and sinker? 537 01:02:53,640 --> 01:02:54,408 Lighter. 538 01:02:57,478 --> 01:03:00,481 I had you huh? Fooled you good. 539 01:03:00,581 --> 01:03:01,915 You going? 540 01:03:02,249 --> 01:03:04,351 So soon? Going, eh? 541 01:03:04,551 --> 01:03:06,520 Everybody goes. 542 01:05:25,459 --> 01:05:26,360 Hurry. 543 01:05:42,810 --> 01:05:43,577 Help me. 544 01:05:48,182 --> 01:05:49,016 Help me. 545 01:06:15,943 --> 01:06:16,877 What? 546 01:07:51,872 --> 01:07:55,142 Madame, this is hard to say... 547 01:07:55,476 --> 01:08:00,180 What? What is it? 548 01:08:02,182 --> 01:08:05,886 He seems to think he's a bird. 549 01:08:08,856 --> 01:08:11,024 I know that much. 550 01:08:18,499 --> 01:08:21,735 The cause seems to be hypnotism. 551 01:08:24,571 --> 01:08:26,840 I know that too. 552 01:08:28,475 --> 01:08:35,315 So how can you cure him? 553 01:08:36,550 --> 01:08:38,852 Don't ask me, Madame. 554 01:08:40,254 --> 01:08:41,321 Well Madame... 555 01:08:46,994 --> 01:08:48,662 Yamaguchi, take a look. 556 01:08:49,863 --> 01:08:52,266 A most unusual case. 557 01:08:53,700 --> 01:08:54,668 Umm... 558 01:08:54,768 --> 01:08:56,503 What do you reckon? 559 01:08:56,703 --> 01:08:58,839 An extremely curious case. 560 01:09:00,340 --> 01:09:04,078 Only a few like this have been reported. 561 01:09:04,578 --> 01:09:09,416 In 1968, a mid 20s Afro-American from Florida, William Oldman... 562 01:09:09,683 --> 01:09:10,350 Umm... 563 01:09:11,051 --> 01:09:11,785 Yes? 564 01:09:14,354 --> 01:09:19,560 How can I get my husband back to normal? 565 01:09:19,860 --> 01:09:23,297 That would be a medical waste. Right, Yamaguchi? 566 01:09:23,464 --> 01:09:24,932 An utter waste. 567 01:09:25,199 --> 01:09:25,933 Right. 568 01:09:26,133 --> 01:09:30,204 Let us keep your husband as a research sample. 569 01:09:32,072 --> 01:09:32,873 No way! 570 01:09:33,741 --> 01:09:35,075 She turned us down. 571 01:09:35,242 --> 01:09:36,110 That's a shame. 572 01:09:38,145 --> 01:09:40,214 This drawing here, Nakajima's. 573 01:09:41,248 --> 01:09:44,551 It's well... Great but... 574 01:09:46,053 --> 01:09:50,557 It's a little normal I guess. Yeah, too normal... 575 01:09:50,958 --> 01:09:54,928 But normal is good but... Well you know. 576 01:09:55,829 --> 01:09:57,898 Now Machida's drawing... 577 01:09:57,965 --> 01:10:00,267 It's well... Interesting, yeah... 578 01:10:01,769 --> 01:10:04,238 Hold it. Something just hit me. 579 01:10:06,840 --> 01:10:11,278 Well, the more I look at it, it's not so interesting... 580 01:10:11,812 --> 01:10:15,749 A bit normal I guess. 581 01:10:17,151 --> 01:10:18,952 What do you think, Machida? 582 01:10:22,289 --> 01:10:26,660 Not interesting at all, huh? Well, you know. 583 01:10:26,860 --> 01:10:29,596 But she said it was good. 584 01:10:30,798 --> 01:10:32,499 Kobayashi's drawing... 585 01:10:33,133 --> 01:10:34,968 It's well... Great... yeah... 586 01:10:35,102 --> 01:10:38,005 Fathers are like Superman to kids. 587 01:10:38,138 --> 01:10:41,942 Yeah, I can see that... Yeah, I get it. 588 01:10:43,210 --> 01:10:46,013 Kaneko, what's this? 589 01:10:46,213 --> 01:10:49,550 Mom always says that Dad loves women. 590 01:10:49,950 --> 01:10:53,887 Well, it's not normal. Great but... 591 01:10:54,188 --> 01:10:58,492 Uh, well, I don't like it. 592 01:10:59,960 --> 01:11:01,395 And Hoshino's drawing... 593 01:11:02,996 --> 01:11:06,400 Yeah... It's is difficult... 594 01:11:57,084 --> 01:11:58,952 What the hell? 595 01:13:11,258 --> 01:13:12,493 What the fuck? 596 01:14:13,020 --> 01:14:16,090 Now the icing. More and more. 597 01:14:16,256 --> 01:14:18,826 How fattening. 598 01:14:19,026 --> 01:14:21,028 More and more. 599 01:14:31,205 --> 01:14:32,172 I'm home. 600 01:14:35,209 --> 01:14:36,677 Where've you been? 601 01:14:37,044 --> 01:14:38,078 It's a secret. 602 01:14:49,890 --> 01:14:51,759 They said they understood. 603 01:14:51,892 --> 01:14:55,262 Do they really understand? But you said that before... 604 01:14:55,729 --> 01:14:58,866 Yeah, yeah. 605 01:15:00,434 --> 01:15:05,539 Yeah... Forget it. Anyway, just do your job. 606 01:15:11,078 --> 01:15:13,747 Working on Xmas Eve? 607 01:15:16,583 --> 01:15:17,551 Something wrong? 608 01:15:18,552 --> 01:15:20,387 Wrong to work on Xmas Eve? 609 01:15:20,921 --> 01:15:24,591 No, I just thought you looked stressed. 610 01:15:25,092 --> 01:15:26,927 You're working, right? 611 01:15:27,060 --> 01:15:29,963 Being a cabbie is my job so... 612 01:15:31,498 --> 01:15:33,067 So... 613 01:15:33,467 --> 01:15:40,174 It's OK for you but not for someone like me who makes commercials huh! 614 01:15:40,307 --> 01:15:42,009 I wouldn't say that... 615 01:15:42,142 --> 01:15:43,410 What're you saying then? 616 01:15:43,977 --> 01:15:45,079 Spit it out! 617 01:15:46,013 --> 01:15:47,448 Hurry up! 618 01:15:47,781 --> 01:15:49,416 So what're you saying? 619 01:15:49,516 --> 01:15:52,252 I was just... I'm sorry. 620 01:15:52,453 --> 01:15:54,088 I was wrong. 621 01:15:54,822 --> 01:15:58,759 I'll be more careful next time. 622 01:15:58,992 --> 01:15:59,860 You got me. 623 01:15:59,993 --> 01:16:03,831 I'm sorry. Forgive me. Sorry! 624 01:16:04,298 --> 01:16:07,601 Out of respect for my hair, forgive me! 625 01:16:07,701 --> 01:16:09,603 Sorry... sorry. 626 01:16:10,537 --> 01:16:12,106 Yoko's Thought Up Commercial 627 01:16:14,441 --> 01:16:15,309 Long day, huh? 628 01:16:15,375 --> 01:16:16,110 A drink? 629 01:16:16,176 --> 01:16:16,777 Nice idea. 630 01:16:17,311 --> 01:16:18,445 Two waters. 631 01:16:19,847 --> 01:16:21,181 Cheers! 632 01:16:24,151 --> 01:16:25,352 Woooow! 633 01:16:25,652 --> 01:16:26,487 And hoooooow! 634 01:16:26,720 --> 01:16:28,822 Water Does Your Body Good. 635 01:16:35,362 --> 01:16:36,363 Now that's funny. 636 01:16:49,309 --> 01:16:50,310 What's with that? 637 01:16:52,880 --> 01:16:54,882 I almost got raped. 638 01:16:55,682 --> 01:16:57,684 Raped? By a guy? 639 01:16:58,652 --> 01:16:59,420 Yeah. 640 01:17:00,687 --> 01:17:01,688 Okay? 641 01:17:02,756 --> 01:17:03,524 Is what okay? 642 01:17:04,425 --> 01:17:05,993 Your body and... 643 01:17:07,027 --> 01:17:09,530 "Almost" got raped. 644 01:17:09,930 --> 01:17:10,864 I see. 645 01:17:19,440 --> 01:17:20,541 Yesterday... 646 01:17:20,941 --> 01:17:22,009 I saw a crow. 647 01:17:22,376 --> 01:17:23,210 Again? 648 01:17:24,211 --> 01:17:26,246 You know, yesterday was trash day. 649 01:17:26,780 --> 01:17:28,916 I didn't know but anyway... 650 01:17:30,951 --> 01:17:34,188 A crow dropped a garbage bag in the middle of the road. 651 01:17:35,589 --> 01:17:36,457 In the road? 652 01:17:37,691 --> 01:17:39,760 Yeah, do you know why? 653 01:17:40,594 --> 01:17:41,895 No idea. 654 01:17:43,864 --> 01:17:48,869 Then a car comes and runs over the garbage bag. 655 01:17:49,069 --> 01:17:50,037 Yeah. 656 01:17:51,905 --> 01:17:53,574 Then the bag breaks open. 657 01:17:53,774 --> 01:17:54,541 Yeah. 658 01:17:56,376 --> 01:18:00,047 Then the crow eats what came out of the bag. 659 01:18:01,315 --> 01:18:02,282 Really. 660 01:18:19,233 --> 01:18:20,134 What's this? 661 01:18:28,642 --> 01:18:30,911 A crab and shrimp having sex... 662 01:18:31,779 --> 01:18:33,781 A new taste is born... 663 01:18:34,281 --> 01:18:35,682 A snack food commercial. 664 01:18:39,820 --> 01:18:41,855 Nose hair grows from lies. 665 01:18:44,091 --> 01:18:47,761 An alien who eats from his butt and poops from his mouth... 666 01:18:48,695 --> 01:18:50,631 Farts hit his nose. 667 01:18:57,137 --> 01:18:59,006 Not a soul in sight. 668 01:19:01,809 --> 01:19:04,144 Well, it is Xmas Eve... 669 01:19:08,148 --> 01:19:08,982 What? 670 01:19:09,316 --> 01:19:10,717 You're dark. 671 01:19:12,119 --> 01:19:13,987 Why so tan? 672 01:19:14,822 --> 01:19:16,723 Really tanned. 673 01:19:17,491 --> 01:19:19,460 Too tanned. 674 01:19:20,194 --> 01:19:22,296 Did you go on vacation? 675 01:19:22,663 --> 01:19:23,697 Nope. 676 01:19:24,331 --> 01:19:26,300 Why are you suddenly... 677 01:19:26,533 --> 01:19:28,235 Hitting the tanning salon? 678 01:19:28,368 --> 01:19:29,903 Nope. 679 01:19:30,170 --> 01:19:31,472 A tanning salon... 680 01:19:31,905 --> 01:19:34,641 is so not you. 681 01:19:35,909 --> 01:19:36,844 Jesus... 682 01:19:37,010 --> 01:19:40,347 Hey man! Are you nuts? 683 01:19:41,315 --> 01:19:43,050 This ain't no phone booth. 684 01:19:43,183 --> 01:19:44,718 Kawaguchi... Sorry. 685 01:19:44,852 --> 01:19:50,724 Hi... Come on... no, no, no, no. 686 01:19:50,858 --> 01:19:53,494 You love talkin' about sex. 687 01:19:54,161 --> 01:19:57,331 Huh? Hello? Hello? 688 01:19:58,532 --> 01:20:01,101 You've got a great body, J. 689 01:20:01,402 --> 01:20:05,239 Ah, thanks man. I work out. 690 01:20:05,539 --> 01:20:06,507 I thought so. 691 01:20:07,074 --> 01:20:08,208 Hitting the gym? 692 01:20:08,375 --> 01:20:09,710 No! I do pushups. 693 01:20:09,877 --> 01:20:10,544 Pushups? 694 01:20:10,711 --> 01:20:12,913 Everyday I do pushups. This is what I do. 695 01:20:17,885 --> 01:20:20,721 Fuck yeah! This is what I do. 696 01:20:42,643 --> 01:20:46,547 Morishita, why you so tan? 697 01:20:46,747 --> 01:20:48,782 Just drop it. 698 01:20:51,752 --> 01:20:53,253 New girlfriend? 699 01:20:55,122 --> 01:20:59,727 No, no, no, no, no... 700 01:20:59,927 --> 01:21:00,961 No, no. No way. 701 01:21:03,430 --> 01:21:04,398 Why not? 702 01:21:04,832 --> 01:21:05,933 Yeah? 703 01:21:08,235 --> 01:21:10,003 Girls and me don't mix. 704 01:21:11,305 --> 01:21:12,940 What do you mean? 705 01:21:14,408 --> 01:21:17,077 Years ago, my sister and I... 706 01:21:19,813 --> 01:21:20,748 What? 707 01:21:20,848 --> 01:21:21,615 You what? 708 01:21:21,815 --> 01:21:22,850 That's bad! 709 01:21:22,983 --> 01:21:23,751 Way bad! 710 01:21:23,851 --> 01:21:26,520 You and your sister! Way bad!! 711 01:21:26,687 --> 01:21:28,789 Hey, hey. What's bad? 712 01:21:29,022 --> 01:21:33,694 Lately, teenagers say 'bad' when they mean 'good'. That bad? 713 01:21:33,827 --> 01:21:34,928 The good meaning. 714 01:21:35,095 --> 01:21:36,196 Bad. Bad? 715 01:21:36,764 --> 01:21:39,433 I'm bad, you know it. 716 01:21:39,500 --> 01:21:41,468 I'm bad. Way bad. 717 01:22:26,180 --> 01:22:27,481 Deodorant commercial... 718 01:22:28,348 --> 01:22:30,717 A man with a canine sense of smell... 719 01:22:31,718 --> 01:22:34,388 He faints at the smell of his feet. 720 01:22:36,190 --> 01:22:40,427 A guy as big as a horse with a condom to match. 721 01:22:54,108 --> 01:22:55,609 Here we go. 722 01:22:55,743 --> 01:22:56,877 Dinner is served. 723 01:23:40,621 --> 01:23:43,223 To Daddy: Merry Christmas 724 01:23:43,424 --> 01:23:44,558 A shampoo commercial... 725 01:23:44,758 --> 01:23:47,327 A man who's sexual pleasure zone is his scalp... 726 01:23:47,594 --> 01:23:49,830 Everytime he washes his hair, he faints in agony. 727 01:23:51,765 --> 01:23:55,402 When a girl's period gets close, she jumps sideways. 728 01:23:56,236 --> 01:23:57,604 Are F1 racers male... 729 01:23:57,738 --> 01:23:58,605 or female? 730 01:23:59,239 --> 01:24:01,275 Not another quiz? 731 01:24:02,309 --> 01:24:03,110 You betcha. 732 01:24:03,277 --> 01:24:06,313 Are F 1 racers, male or female? 733 01:24:08,816 --> 01:24:12,086 You and your quizzes. 734 01:24:12,286 --> 01:24:13,921 J, entertain this guy. 735 01:24:14,121 --> 01:24:16,256 OK. F1 racers, huh? 736 01:24:16,457 --> 01:24:18,459 You betcha. Male or female? 737 01:24:18,792 --> 01:24:20,794 F1 racers, huh... 738 01:24:23,297 --> 01:24:25,432 This is a tricky one. 739 01:24:25,699 --> 01:24:28,435 The answer is male. Do you know why? 740 01:24:29,136 --> 01:24:31,772 Men are 'quick'? 741 01:24:33,674 --> 01:24:35,776 Close but no cigar. 742 01:24:36,276 --> 01:24:39,713 Because racing takes 'balls'. 743 01:24:40,681 --> 01:24:42,049 Balls? 744 01:24:42,483 --> 01:24:44,818 Balls. These! 745 01:24:56,497 --> 01:24:59,400 Maybe I should quiz that guy? 746 01:25:00,834 --> 01:25:02,703 Stop it, idiot. 747 01:25:02,903 --> 01:25:05,172 They look bad. Don't you dare. 748 01:25:05,339 --> 01:25:07,040 'Bad' meaning 'good' right? 749 01:25:07,241 --> 01:25:09,376 Seriously, don't do it. 750 01:25:10,144 --> 01:25:15,048 Excuse me but are F1 racers, male or female? 751 01:25:31,331 --> 01:25:36,270 I'm feeling really good right now in this sauna. 752 01:25:36,770 --> 01:25:38,205 Please don't talk to me. 753 01:25:38,405 --> 01:25:41,175 Don't know the answer, do you? 754 01:25:41,575 --> 01:25:45,379 So which is it? Male or female? 755 01:25:56,557 --> 01:26:02,196 You mustn't ask me questions. You idiot. 756 01:26:03,797 --> 01:26:06,967 I knew it. Don't know, do you? 757 01:26:07,101 --> 01:26:10,571 Give up? Give up? 758 01:26:11,872 --> 01:26:16,110 The answer is male. The reason is... 759 01:26:17,945 --> 01:26:19,546 it takes 'balls'. 760 01:26:23,717 --> 01:26:25,152 Too bad. 761 01:26:25,386 --> 01:26:29,890 Next question. Is a bullet train, male or female? 762 01:26:40,100 --> 01:26:42,236 I told you no questions! 763 01:26:42,503 --> 01:26:46,974 Go back to your area. Get out! Damnit! 764 01:26:47,107 --> 01:26:49,576 No giving up this time. 765 01:26:49,777 --> 01:26:53,313 So which is it? Male or female? 766 01:26:53,480 --> 01:26:55,416 Follow your instincts. 767 01:27:02,122 --> 01:27:04,591 You deaf? I said no questions! 768 01:27:04,758 --> 01:27:08,328 He's feeling good in the sauna. Stop botherin' me or I'll kill you. 769 01:27:08,495 --> 01:27:10,964 You... you homo. 770 01:27:11,832 --> 01:27:12,800 Are you a homo? 771 01:27:15,502 --> 01:27:16,537 We don't need homos. 772 01:27:34,955 --> 01:27:36,857 Is your friend a homo too? 773 01:27:37,891 --> 01:27:41,195 No! I ain't no homo... 774 01:27:53,340 --> 01:27:54,174 I'm gay! 775 01:28:24,438 --> 01:28:26,540 J! You okay? 776 01:28:39,420 --> 01:28:41,121 What is m-m-my function in life? 777 01:28:57,571 --> 01:28:59,106 An pain relief medicine commercial... 778 01:28:59,239 --> 01:29:01,575 A guy's head hurts so much it explodes... 779 01:29:01,708 --> 01:29:04,111 His brains fly BOOM, BANG! 780 01:30:03,303 --> 01:30:04,972 Wow! 781 01:32:46,934 --> 01:32:48,535 What's with... 782 01:32:49,136 --> 01:32:51,605 What an outfit. 783 01:33:49,897 --> 01:33:51,265 I'm so stupid. 784 01:35:30,264 --> 01:35:34,101 I wonder when he'll be cured. 785 01:35:35,769 --> 01:35:37,638 I'm on the verge of neurosis. 786 01:35:38,305 --> 01:35:40,340 Maybe by New Year's? 787 01:35:42,476 --> 01:35:45,979 Does Grandma know about Dad? 788 01:35:47,614 --> 01:35:51,051 I haven't told her. How could I? 789 01:35:51,852 --> 01:35:53,020 After all... 790 01:35:56,023 --> 01:35:58,125 we can't go visit her like this. 791 01:35:59,393 --> 01:36:01,295 No, we can't. 792 01:36:04,832 --> 01:36:05,966 This can't... 793 01:36:09,636 --> 01:36:11,672 go on forever, can it? 794 01:36:11,839 --> 01:36:15,209 Don't say such things. He'll be fine. 795 01:36:15,509 --> 01:36:16,377 I wonder. 796 01:36:16,510 --> 01:36:17,511 He'll be fine. 797 01:36:19,146 --> 01:36:20,180 I don't know. 798 01:36:24,585 --> 01:36:25,552 He'll be fine. 799 01:36:32,526 --> 01:36:33,327 Daddy! 800 01:36:47,408 --> 01:36:49,443 Why did this happen?! 801 01:37:01,088 --> 01:37:02,756 I told my friends. 802 01:37:04,792 --> 01:37:09,029 My dad is a dad but he's also a bird. 803 01:37:11,698 --> 01:37:12,599 Keiichi. 804 01:37:16,737 --> 01:37:21,275 Some kids laughed but... Kaneko said he was cool. 805 01:37:27,114 --> 01:37:32,920 "A bird-dad is just like an animation hero." 806 01:37:38,092 --> 01:37:42,463 "Can your dad fly?" I told him he will soon. 807 01:37:47,901 --> 01:37:52,573 It's cool with me. No matter what dad is. 808 01:38:15,329 --> 01:38:18,365 Everything changes. 809 01:38:21,268 --> 01:38:25,773 Dad being a bird really hinges on our perspective. 810 01:38:28,308 --> 01:38:30,778 Dad merely changed. 811 01:38:32,112 --> 01:38:34,548 Next, we have to change. 812 01:38:36,617 --> 01:38:39,620 Having a bird-dad has advantages. 813 01:38:40,954 --> 01:38:43,223 We can't be sad forever. 814 01:38:46,026 --> 01:38:49,530 We should enjoy being with bird-dad. 815 01:38:50,564 --> 01:38:54,134 After all, life is short, right? 816 01:38:55,703 --> 01:38:59,907 It's no skin off my nose if I never eat chicken again. 817 01:41:36,196 --> 01:41:36,997 Hey! 818 01:41:37,197 --> 01:41:38,832 Sorry to bother you so late but... 819 01:41:39,233 --> 01:41:42,703 I'm going home and I wanted to say bye. 820 01:41:47,674 --> 01:41:51,979 Thanks to you, I was able to perform a most worthwhile job. 821 01:41:52,346 --> 01:41:57,184 And if there's any chance that I might be of service in the future. 822 01:42:02,756 --> 01:42:04,992 Thank you ever so much. 823 01:42:05,225 --> 01:42:07,995 Here's a small token of... 824 01:42:14,268 --> 01:42:18,839 I'm terribly sorry. It seems I've made a mistake. 825 01:42:18,906 --> 01:42:20,207 Don't sweat it. 826 01:42:20,874 --> 01:42:22,042 This won't take long. 827 01:42:23,877 --> 01:42:27,581 Of course, it will be no charge. This won't take long. 828 01:42:40,728 --> 01:42:41,528 Huh? 829 01:42:57,578 --> 01:42:58,312 Hello? 830 01:43:01,415 --> 01:43:05,252 I'm truly sorry. My mistake. 831 01:43:07,488 --> 01:43:09,089 This time I won't fail you. 832 01:43:09,323 --> 01:43:10,891 I said forget about it. 833 01:43:13,727 --> 01:43:15,562 Forget about it. 834 01:43:16,230 --> 01:43:17,264 Where are you?! 835 01:43:17,765 --> 01:43:20,100 I said forget about it. Stop! 836 01:43:24,271 --> 01:43:25,272 No need to worry. 837 01:43:25,439 --> 01:43:27,074 I'll be done soon. 838 01:43:27,174 --> 01:43:29,243 I said no. Forget it. 839 01:43:30,110 --> 01:43:31,412 We found her. 840 01:43:33,180 --> 01:43:33,947 Hold it! 841 01:52:17,938 --> 01:52:23,944 What... c-can I do for you today? 842 01:52:28,515 --> 01:52:30,217 That photo... 843 01:52:31,719 --> 01:52:34,888 Really nicely taken, huh? 844 01:52:39,827 --> 01:52:44,798 If you'd like, I'll give you one. 845 01:52:47,134 --> 01:52:51,538 H-Hold it. W-W-W-What are you doing? 846 01:52:54,408 --> 01:52:56,143 What are YOU doing? 847 01:52:58,412 --> 01:52:59,813 Me? I wonder. 848 01:53:14,595 --> 01:53:18,065 What? What are you doing? 849 01:53:18,866 --> 01:53:20,501 We're high up. 850 01:59:42,383 --> 01:59:46,086 Directed by Gen Sekiguchi 53177

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