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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,500 --> 00:00:05,572 Tickets this way for the Chatsworth Express! 2 00:00:05,660 --> 00:00:08,174 Come and watch pikeys making a mess 3 00:00:08,260 --> 00:00:11,855 of the lives they were given by 'im upstairs... 4 00:00:11,940 --> 00:00:14,898 And kids they're convinced aren't actually theirs. 5 00:00:14,980 --> 00:00:16,095 Wicked! 6 00:00:16,180 --> 00:00:17,499 Piss off! 7 00:00:17,580 --> 00:00:21,368 What sounds on Earth could ever replace 8 00:00:21,460 --> 00:00:24,497 kids needing money or wives in your face? 9 00:00:24,580 --> 00:00:26,935 Cos this, people reckon - me included - 10 00:00:27,020 --> 00:00:29,488 is why pubs and drugs 11 00:00:29,580 --> 00:00:31,172 were kindly invented... 12 00:00:31,260 --> 00:00:33,774 To calm us all down and stop us going mental. 13 00:00:33,860 --> 00:00:38,570 These are Chatsworth Estate's basic essentials. 14 00:00:38,660 --> 00:00:44,815 We are worth every penny for grinding your axes... 15 00:00:44,900 --> 00:00:46,379 You sit on our head, 16 00:00:46,460 --> 00:00:49,133 but... you pay the taxes. 17 00:00:49,220 --> 00:00:50,619 CHEERING 18 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,373 Imagine Britain without Chatsworth buccaneers 19 00:00:53,460 --> 00:00:56,691 who'd come on your face for the price of a beer, eh? 20 00:00:56,780 --> 00:00:58,259 Eh! 21 00:00:58,340 --> 00:01:02,094 Make poverty history. Cheaper drugs now! 22 00:01:02,180 --> 00:01:07,049 Make poverty history! Cheaper drugs now! 23 00:01:07,140 --> 00:01:08,459 CHUCKLES 24 00:01:08,540 --> 00:01:12,169 Scatter! Party! 25 00:01:18,700 --> 00:01:23,251 (Liam) 'Money was invented by the Algerian Empire, back in 1200BC. 26 00:01:23,340 --> 00:01:26,218 'Heavy coins, known as shekels. 27 00:01:26,300 --> 00:01:29,451 'Paper money wasn't invented until 1000AD 28 00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:33,658 'when the Romans got sick of coins weighing down their togas. 29 00:01:33,740 --> 00:01:36,095 'The first recorded use of money 30 00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:39,092 'was when 12 shekels were paid to Algar Hammurabi 31 00:01:39,180 --> 00:01:41,694 'in return for the use of his daughter. 32 00:01:41,780 --> 00:01:44,294 'I'm not making this up. It's on the internet. 33 00:01:44,380 --> 00:01:47,372 'Some people say having no money isn't that bad. 34 00:01:47,460 --> 00:01:50,657 'Teaches you to be, y'know, a proper person and all that. 35 00:01:50,740 --> 00:01:52,970 'People who say that usually live in nice houses, 36 00:01:53,060 --> 00:01:56,097 'with two cars, and can afford to talk out their arses.' 37 00:01:56,180 --> 00:02:00,571 Er, forget it. You start sticking your giro in here, then we'll talk. 38 00:02:02,300 --> 00:02:04,655 'Let's face it. Being poor is shit. 39 00:02:04,740 --> 00:02:07,493 'Sorry for swearing. But it's true. 40 00:02:07,580 --> 00:02:10,048 'It's shit.' 41 00:02:18,900 --> 00:02:21,175 - Um... - I paid for the milk. 42 00:02:21,260 --> 00:02:24,093 Party's a goer. Lan, you all right to close tonight? 43 00:02:24,180 --> 00:02:27,616 Dunno. Switching off lights, locking doors - it's a big responsibility! 44 00:02:27,700 --> 00:02:30,931 Here, keep 'em. You fancy it, you can move into the spare room. 45 00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:33,898 We should discuss this first, eh? 46 00:02:36,580 --> 00:02:39,253 Fine. Take the room. 47 00:02:39,340 --> 00:02:43,253 If you manage to get a girlfriend, you might be glad of it. 48 00:02:43,340 --> 00:02:44,898 You've only got enough for a half. 49 00:02:44,980 --> 00:02:46,971 (On TV) 'Somewhere on the Chatsworth Estate,' 50 00:02:47,060 --> 00:02:49,051 'a mystery man or woman is walking around, 51 00:02:49,140 --> 00:02:52,496 'in possession of a lottery ticket worth half a million pounds. 52 00:02:52,580 --> 00:02:55,970 'According to lottery officials, that ticket remains unclaimed.' 53 00:02:56,060 --> 00:02:58,415 Lottery! Idiot tax, isn't it? 54 00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:00,218 Sign of a poor economy. 55 00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:03,053 'That ticket still remains unclaimed.' 56 00:03:03,140 --> 00:03:07,895 More chance of being struck twice by lightning. Chalky, am I right? 57 00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:10,335 'The ticket may have been bought in this very shop, 58 00:03:10,420 --> 00:03:13,378 'You were working on the day the ticket was sold, is that right? 59 00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:16,657 'Yes. That's right. Saturday's a very big lottery day for us. 60 00:03:16,740 --> 00:03:20,415 'It's Friday. The ticket was bought last thing on that Friday night. 61 00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:21,853 'Must be exciting nevertheless, 62 00:03:21,940 --> 00:03:24,090 'to think that the winner could be someone you know? 63 00:03:24,180 --> 00:03:27,331 'Yes, well, my shop is very popular. 64 00:03:27,420 --> 00:03:29,376 'Friday? Friday? 65 00:03:29,460 --> 00:03:30,529 'Friday, yeah. 66 00:03:30,620 --> 00:03:32,975 'It were my birthday on Friday. 67 00:03:35,460 --> 00:03:36,449 'Oh, nol' 68 00:03:36,540 --> 00:03:38,531 Just 80 quid... 69 00:03:38,620 --> 00:03:40,212 - Hurry up. - You're not having a new bloody phone. 70 00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:43,372 - (Boy) You said you'd give us a lift. - Just a sec. 71 00:03:43,460 --> 00:03:45,496 - Customer awaiting service. - I need a lift! 72 00:03:45,580 --> 00:03:48,094 - A phone! - Will you all just shut up! 73 00:03:56,380 --> 00:03:57,938 It was him. 74 00:03:58,020 --> 00:03:59,931 Fucking Frank Gallagher. 75 00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:02,056 'If you could just watch it, we are actually live, 76 00:04:02,140 --> 00:04:05,450 - 'so just watch your language. - 'Frank fucking Gallagher! 77 00:04:05,540 --> 00:04:09,453 (Man) 'Frank Gallagher - a very lucky man. Stay with us. I'll be giving you... ' 78 00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:10,609 Lucky bastard. 79 00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:14,170 '... hopefully, an answer to the question we're all asking - where are you, Frank? ' 80 00:04:26,900 --> 00:04:28,253 What? 81 00:04:28,340 --> 00:04:32,049 Well, done, Frank, you lucky bastard. 82 00:04:32,140 --> 00:04:33,129 CHEERING 83 00:04:33,220 --> 00:04:36,257 It was just a piss. But thank you. 84 00:04:36,340 --> 00:04:39,093 Dad. That guy on the telly, he's saying you've won the lottery. 85 00:04:39,180 --> 00:04:41,296 (Karen) Half a million. 86 00:04:41,380 --> 00:04:43,291 CHEERING 87 00:04:43,380 --> 00:04:46,690 Get this man a drink! 88 00:04:46,780 --> 00:04:49,169 A drink? 89 00:04:49,260 --> 00:04:50,898 Yeah! To celebrate your success. 90 00:04:50,980 --> 00:04:53,619 - I'll get him a drink. - I'll get him one. 91 00:04:53,700 --> 00:04:55,452 (Chalky) Come on, get this man a pint. 92 00:04:55,540 --> 00:04:57,576 (Man) I'll get him one an' all. 93 00:04:59,020 --> 00:05:01,534 Well, you know, the truth is, you know... 94 00:05:04,580 --> 00:05:07,413 The truth is, see, I didn't want to boast or nothing. 95 00:05:07,500 --> 00:05:10,412 It's just... Any chance of a chaser in this? 96 00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:12,252 (Man) Get him a double. 97 00:05:12,340 --> 00:05:15,810 I've been brought up properly. It's vulgar to mention money, innit? 98 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,255 Still, you know what they say... 99 00:05:18,340 --> 00:05:20,729 you gotta be in it to win it! 100 00:05:21,860 --> 00:05:24,613 Way back in Ancient Greece, like, 101 00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:28,852 it was the gods themselves who used to reward the heroes... 102 00:05:28,940 --> 00:05:30,896 (Karen) Do you believe this? 103 00:05:30,980 --> 00:05:32,732 I have no idea. 104 00:05:32,820 --> 00:05:35,414 Keep his tab open. We're quids in here. 105 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:37,570 Right. Be back late. Maybe morning. 106 00:05:37,660 --> 00:05:41,050 Maybe not till afternoon. Big Jim's parties are legendary. 107 00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:44,371 Don't suppose you could lend us half a million quid or so? 108 00:05:50,060 --> 00:05:52,654 Don't tell me people are actually buying this. 109 00:05:52,740 --> 00:05:55,732 Must be round most of the estate. Busiest night we've had in ages. 110 00:05:55,820 --> 00:05:57,970 Poor bastards down in Guantanamo Bay... 111 00:05:58,060 --> 00:06:00,051 LAUGHTER 112 00:06:00,140 --> 00:06:01,334 Until I see the cheque... 113 00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:03,695 Like Romulus and Remus... 114 00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:05,054 Does Mum know yet? 115 00:06:05,140 --> 00:06:07,700 SCREAMS 116 00:06:07,780 --> 00:06:11,773 Yeah. She knows. Tried telling her it was all nonsense, but, y'know. 117 00:06:11,860 --> 00:06:16,058 Should have a word with him before he does something really stupid. 118 00:06:16,140 --> 00:06:17,255 Christ, the croupier! 119 00:06:20,740 --> 00:06:22,935 I'm not saying it was the Almighty, 120 00:06:23,020 --> 00:06:26,933 but there's a certain order to the cosmos. 121 00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,214 Hello, baby. 122 00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:30,814 - Can I see it? - See what? 123 00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:34,051 - The winning ticket. - Yes, show us the ticket! 124 00:06:34,140 --> 00:06:37,610 The winning... See it? Right. 125 00:06:37,700 --> 00:06:38,894 So? 126 00:06:38,980 --> 00:06:41,494 It's in me other jeans. 127 00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:44,449 Other jeans? 128 00:06:44,540 --> 00:06:47,976 Oh, Christ, you know, learn to walk at three, 129 00:06:48,060 --> 00:06:51,211 and then they learn to start fucking nagging by the age of four. 130 00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:53,973 LAUGHTER 131 00:06:54,060 --> 00:06:55,459 I'm not nagging. 132 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:58,293 At home, with the housekeeping, she's got this little tin. 133 00:06:58,380 --> 00:07:01,895 It's all, "got a tin, got a tin, got a fucking tin..." 134 00:07:02,940 --> 00:07:04,658 Someone has to keep charge of the money. 135 00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:07,254 - (Mocking) "Someone's got to take charge... - Dad... 136 00:07:07,340 --> 00:07:10,537 "Dadl" Yap, yap, like a Chihuahua. 137 00:07:10,620 --> 00:07:16,058 Go on! Go back and cut up yer discount coupons! 138 00:07:16,140 --> 00:07:19,530 If she won the lottery it'd sit in that bloody tin. 139 00:07:30,140 --> 00:07:31,368 Handing in my notice. 140 00:07:31,460 --> 00:07:34,258 You can't quit. We've got lottery fever going on here. 141 00:07:34,340 --> 00:07:35,455 All arses on deck. 142 00:07:35,540 --> 00:07:38,338 I'm heir to a fortune. Don't need this job. 143 00:07:38,420 --> 00:07:39,614 I'll give you a pay rise. 144 00:07:39,700 --> 00:07:41,133 Three quid an hour. 145 00:07:42,580 --> 00:07:43,615 You're on. 146 00:07:46,540 --> 00:07:49,179 I'm on three quid an hour already. 147 00:07:55,140 --> 00:07:57,096 RAUCOUS SINGING 148 00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:31,696 ...First thing that comes into your head when you see it 149 00:08:31,780 --> 00:08:34,852 And it looks like it... 150 00:08:38,780 --> 00:08:40,657 I've got a better idea. Come on. 151 00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:44,855 GRUNTING 152 00:08:49,500 --> 00:08:50,455 DOOR SLAMS 153 00:08:50,540 --> 00:08:52,212 - What was that? - Shit! 154 00:08:52,300 --> 00:08:54,894 Shit! Shit! 155 00:08:54,980 --> 00:08:57,858 It's not your fault, babe. 156 00:08:57,940 --> 00:09:01,933 I mean, who has a fucking karaoke machine in their flat, eh? 157 00:09:02,020 --> 00:09:04,170 Don't. I can still hear him singing. 158 00:09:04,260 --> 00:09:06,296 Ah, home sweet home. 159 00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:10,778 Come on. 160 00:09:14,660 --> 00:09:15,809 I'm sorry about that. 161 00:09:17,260 --> 00:09:20,411 Maybe we can finish off, you know, tomorrow night? 162 00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:22,650 Maybe. If you get yer own bed. 163 00:09:36,420 --> 00:09:37,694 Shit! 164 00:09:39,140 --> 00:09:40,892 - Yee-hah! 165 00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:42,971 CHEERING 166 00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:45,415 We won't need those any more, will we? 167 00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:47,809 We are in the money, as they say. 168 00:09:47,900 --> 00:09:51,779 Yee-hah! Money! 169 00:09:53,820 --> 00:09:56,653 Debbie, love. I don't know why you're wasting your time. 170 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:24,736 - Your secret's safe with me. - Fine. 171 00:10:24,820 --> 00:10:26,651 Should be more careful in future. 172 00:10:26,740 --> 00:10:28,139 Sure. 173 00:10:29,540 --> 00:10:32,134 How long have you known for? I can't believe it. 174 00:10:32,220 --> 00:10:36,099 And I never guessed, and usually, I have a radar for these things. 175 00:10:36,180 --> 00:10:37,215 Karen. 176 00:10:37,300 --> 00:10:40,098 Hey, you don't need to be ashamed. 177 00:10:40,180 --> 00:10:43,252 I'm not ashamed. I just need to take a piss, all right? 178 00:10:51,580 --> 00:10:53,855 (Monica) That's the instructions... 179 00:10:53,940 --> 00:10:56,773 We're millionaires! We're millionaires! 180 00:10:56,860 --> 00:11:00,057 Dad. That bloke on the telly, he's saying you've won the lottery. 181 00:11:00,140 --> 00:11:03,576 Another pint, Frank? Get him another one. Come on, Frank. 182 00:11:05,660 --> 00:11:09,892 Now then, I happen to know that you've been wanting one of these. 183 00:11:09,980 --> 00:11:11,129 (Carl) Cool. 184 00:11:11,220 --> 00:11:12,369 (Monica) And for little Liam... 185 00:11:14,700 --> 00:11:16,338 Don't worry. I haven't forgotten you. 186 00:11:18,020 --> 00:11:19,294 Our Princess. 187 00:11:20,100 --> 00:11:21,453 Make-up. 188 00:11:21,540 --> 00:11:23,496 That's the same brand that I use. 189 00:11:23,580 --> 00:11:25,491 You'll be fighting them off with a stick soon. 190 00:11:25,580 --> 00:11:28,378 And for lickle babba... 191 00:11:28,460 --> 00:11:31,338 You got quite a haul there, Mon... 192 00:11:31,420 --> 00:11:35,015 Yeah, well, Norma was kind enough to let us use her credit card. 193 00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:37,056 You'll be paying it back though, Frank. 194 00:11:37,140 --> 00:11:40,371 - Soon as the, er, cheque arrives. - When is that, exactly? 195 00:11:40,460 --> 00:11:42,257 Well, the thing is... 196 00:11:42,340 --> 00:11:44,012 there is no money. 197 00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:54,454 Well, the thing is... 198 00:11:54,540 --> 00:11:58,135 It's all that, you know, red tape, and that, you know. 199 00:11:58,220 --> 00:12:00,415 Lottery says it'll be here... 200 00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:02,013 end of the week. 201 00:12:02,100 --> 00:12:03,169 Better be. 202 00:12:03,260 --> 00:12:05,330 And for my rich, successful husband... 203 00:12:05,420 --> 00:12:08,537 It's about time you embraced the 21st century. 204 00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:10,815 Now we'll always be able to stay in touch. 205 00:12:12,580 --> 00:12:13,615 Fantastic. 206 00:12:13,700 --> 00:12:15,577 (Liam) Gimme the money or the kid gets it! 207 00:12:15,660 --> 00:12:18,732 PHONE RINGS 208 00:12:20,100 --> 00:12:21,055 Hello? 209 00:12:21,140 --> 00:12:22,175 Hiya, love! 210 00:12:22,260 --> 00:12:24,535 I'm just about done. 211 00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:26,770 Don't s'pose there's any chance of a cup of tea? 212 00:12:26,860 --> 00:12:28,896 Just got one more thing to check. 213 00:12:28,980 --> 00:12:32,939 Why don't you have a coffee from our brand-new cappuccino machine! 214 00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:35,693 It does mocha, latte, and frappuccino. 215 00:12:35,780 --> 00:12:38,294 Er, just tea, thanks. 216 00:12:39,740 --> 00:12:41,458 MOUTHS 217 00:12:41,540 --> 00:12:45,135 Council re-evaluating the house. We can afford something new now. 218 00:12:45,220 --> 00:12:47,290 Maybe a semi-detached with a garage. 219 00:12:47,380 --> 00:12:49,974 This place can go to someone less fortunate. 220 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:51,413 We're so lucky. 221 00:13:00,740 --> 00:13:03,049 VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRS 222 00:13:19,860 --> 00:13:21,452 (Mickey) No family to hassle you. 223 00:13:21,540 --> 00:13:23,371 Dead lucky getting to stay here. 224 00:13:23,460 --> 00:13:25,098 Able to have over who you want. 225 00:13:25,180 --> 00:13:27,410 Even stay the night. 226 00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:30,060 I had to sleep on the floor last night. Dead lucky! 227 00:13:30,140 --> 00:13:32,859 How am I supposed to have a sex life without a bed? 228 00:13:32,940 --> 00:13:34,134 Well, I can get you a bed. 229 00:13:34,220 --> 00:13:36,131 - What's the catch? - No catch. 230 00:13:36,220 --> 00:13:37,209 Really. 231 00:13:40,340 --> 00:13:42,695 I can't believe you fucked some guy in our bed. 232 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,657 - Keep it down. - You're fucking disgusting. 233 00:13:44,740 --> 00:13:45,889 And you're an homophobe! 234 00:13:45,980 --> 00:13:49,097 Animal, vegetable, mineral, I couldn't give a monkey's twat 235 00:13:49,180 --> 00:13:51,694 what you're into, but not in our fucking bed! 236 00:13:51,780 --> 00:13:54,977 You're right. I'll make it up to you, but I need to know 237 00:13:55,060 --> 00:13:58,655 you're not going to spread this around. Promise me, Karen. Please. 238 00:13:58,740 --> 00:14:00,537 Hey, what's up? 239 00:14:00,620 --> 00:14:02,690 Gayboy here fucked some guy in our bed. 240 00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:05,248 - Fuck's sake! - You're gay? Really? 241 00:14:05,340 --> 00:14:08,059 Hello? Not the point. In our bed. 242 00:14:08,140 --> 00:14:10,131 Thought you weren't gonna tell anyone. 243 00:14:10,220 --> 00:14:11,733 He's me husband. I have to tell him. 244 00:14:11,820 --> 00:14:13,458 I don't really care either way. 245 00:14:13,540 --> 00:14:15,371 That's not what I'm worried about. Jesus! 246 00:14:15,460 --> 00:14:17,212 You're the guy who used our fucking bed. 247 00:14:17,300 --> 00:14:20,372 You don't get to act all pissed off here. 248 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:23,691 I tell him everything, we're totally honest with each other. So deal with it. 249 00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,054 You tell him everything? 250 00:14:25,140 --> 00:14:26,368 - Really? - Yeah. 251 00:14:26,460 --> 00:14:29,213 How you used to suck off the delivery guy for a discount? 252 00:14:29,300 --> 00:14:31,495 That old guy you gave a hand-job to for a bet? 253 00:14:31,580 --> 00:14:33,093 What about you shagging my dad? 254 00:14:37,420 --> 00:14:39,217 Shit, I didn't mean to... 255 00:14:39,300 --> 00:14:41,131 It's all right. I'm cool. 256 00:14:52,140 --> 00:14:55,257 The longer it goes on, the worse it's gonna get. 257 00:14:55,340 --> 00:14:57,979 Not just for you. For all of us. 258 00:14:58,060 --> 00:14:59,698 You didn't win the lottery. 259 00:15:01,460 --> 00:15:04,020 It's all about perception, Deb, innit? 260 00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:06,933 If everyone says the sky is green, then the sky is green. 261 00:15:07,020 --> 00:15:10,057 No, the sky would be blue. Everyone would just be wrong. 262 00:15:10,140 --> 00:15:11,459 You have to tell them. 263 00:15:14,740 --> 00:15:15,729 Debbie... 264 00:15:18,620 --> 00:15:23,296 Oh, come on, having money changes things. People look up to me now. 265 00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:26,178 Well done! You've worked out that people pay attention 266 00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:28,091 when they think you've got cash. 267 00:15:28,180 --> 00:15:30,250 What about the one when you realise every action has a consequence? 268 00:15:30,340 --> 00:15:34,777 Fuckin' hell, it's like being interrogated by the inventor of Scrabble. 269 00:15:34,860 --> 00:15:36,054 KNOCKING 270 00:15:36,140 --> 00:15:39,530 - Yes?! - It's my kitten, mister. 271 00:15:39,620 --> 00:15:42,737 Vet says he needs a new heart. Will you help him, please? 272 00:15:42,820 --> 00:15:44,219 Do I look like I've got charity 273 00:15:44,300 --> 00:15:46,575 - stamped across my fucking forehead? - No. 274 00:15:46,660 --> 00:15:49,538 My hubby's lost both his legs in an industrial accident. 275 00:15:49,620 --> 00:15:50,894 Oh! Bloody hell! 276 00:15:50,980 --> 00:15:54,575 The Government's stopped his disability benefit, the bastards. 277 00:15:54,660 --> 00:15:57,333 - You're his only hope! - Oh! 278 00:15:57,420 --> 00:15:59,411 Tell 'em. 279 00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:07,176 I'm not fucking Bono, you know. 280 00:16:07,260 --> 00:16:08,739 Frank! 281 00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:12,415 CROWD CALLS OUT 282 00:16:12,500 --> 00:16:14,855 Come on, come on. 283 00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:17,135 (Mickey) Not bad, eh? 284 00:16:17,220 --> 00:16:18,255 (Ian) Yeah. It's all right. 285 00:16:18,340 --> 00:16:24,176 - What's up with you? It's a free bed. - Nothing, I'm just worried about stuff. 286 00:16:24,260 --> 00:16:26,455 Never mind. 287 00:16:26,540 --> 00:16:28,212 It's springy. 288 00:16:28,300 --> 00:16:29,733 - Eh? - The bed. 289 00:16:29,820 --> 00:16:31,538 I had a bounce on it. 290 00:16:31,620 --> 00:16:33,258 Very springy. 291 00:16:34,180 --> 00:16:35,408 Better get a move on. 292 00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:40,252 - Who did you say this belonged to? - Told you. Mate of mine. 293 00:16:40,340 --> 00:16:42,774 - He's moving to Costa Rica. Don't need it. - Costa Rica? 294 00:16:44,580 --> 00:16:47,378 You...! 295 00:16:47,460 --> 00:16:51,055 You can't even make up a convincing sounding story, can you? Admit it. 296 00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:52,892 - You nicked it. - I did not. 297 00:16:52,980 --> 00:16:55,369 You're the worst liar I've ever met! We've gotta dump this. 298 00:16:55,460 --> 00:16:58,054 - I'm not risking carting around some knock-off. - Fuck you! 299 00:16:58,140 --> 00:17:00,893 I bought it, OK! 300 00:17:00,980 --> 00:17:03,892 I fucking paid for it, 50 quid from a mate. 301 00:17:03,980 --> 00:17:06,016 I bought you the fucking bed. 302 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,773 - OK. Calm down. - You dick! 303 00:17:08,860 --> 00:17:11,249 I didn't mean to... Why would you buy me a bed? 304 00:17:11,340 --> 00:17:13,171 SIREN WHOOPS 305 00:17:15,500 --> 00:17:16,853 Shite sticks! 306 00:17:16,940 --> 00:17:19,898 I thought you said this bed wasn't stolen. 307 00:17:19,980 --> 00:17:21,095 It's not. 308 00:17:21,180 --> 00:17:24,217 That's me dad's van! 309 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:26,894 But I couldn't stick a bed in a limo, could I! 310 00:17:41,660 --> 00:17:43,298 Frankie! 311 00:17:43,380 --> 00:17:46,178 Listen, Frank, we stuck these on your tab. It's all right, innit? 312 00:17:46,260 --> 00:17:47,932 Yeah. Yeah, course. 313 00:17:48,020 --> 00:17:50,659 Share the wealth and all that. 314 00:17:50,740 --> 00:17:54,176 What's with the dirty eyeball? 315 00:17:54,260 --> 00:17:55,295 Nothin'. 316 00:17:55,380 --> 00:17:57,211 I believe there was talk of a pint? 317 00:17:58,580 --> 00:18:00,775 MOBILE RINGS 318 00:18:06,060 --> 00:18:07,288 Hello. 319 00:18:07,380 --> 00:18:09,018 (Man) 'Is that Frank Gallagher? 320 00:18:09,100 --> 00:18:11,216 'Lucky Lotto winner Frank Gallagher? ' 321 00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:12,335 Yes. It is he. 322 00:18:12,420 --> 00:18:14,980 'Do you love your children, Frank? ' 323 00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:16,732 Is it a trick question? 324 00:18:16,820 --> 00:18:18,048 'We have your son.' 325 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:19,255 What's that? 326 00:18:19,340 --> 00:18:21,217 'Your son. Liam. 327 00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:24,337 'Half a million quid, if you wanna see him again. 328 00:18:24,420 --> 00:18:26,058 'We'll be in touch.' 329 00:18:28,260 --> 00:18:31,616 Do you love children, Mr Gallagher? 330 00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:34,851 What did you say? What the fuck did you say?! 331 00:18:34,940 --> 00:18:38,649 No, s'just... starving children... Africa... could use your help. 332 00:18:43,860 --> 00:18:45,737 Just, fuck... Just... 333 00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:50,091 Leave me alone! 334 00:18:55,940 --> 00:18:57,851 Liam! 335 00:19:15,100 --> 00:19:16,931 Does the Jacuzzi come with silver chrome as well? 336 00:19:17,020 --> 00:19:20,012 Mon, you seen lickle Liam anywhere? 337 00:19:20,100 --> 00:19:22,853 He's probably in his room or something. 338 00:19:22,940 --> 00:19:26,250 Right. And does that one come with the deluxe bubbles package? 339 00:19:40,900 --> 00:19:42,299 Cleaning windows. 340 00:19:42,380 --> 00:19:43,813 Er, obviously! 341 00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,936 Yeah, looks nice. 342 00:19:46,020 --> 00:19:48,773 Great conservatory, that... 343 00:19:48,860 --> 00:19:50,498 All right, OK. What's with the friendly fucking neighbour act? 344 00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:52,775 It's my little 'un, Liam. 345 00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:56,739 He's been kidnapped. Thought you'd know something about it. 346 00:19:58,260 --> 00:20:01,969 You've got a fucking nerve, Gallagher. I would never touch kids. 347 00:20:02,060 --> 00:20:06,338 No, no, Jesus! I meant, I thought you'd know what to do. 348 00:20:06,420 --> 00:20:08,729 Well, why didn't you say so, then? 349 00:20:08,820 --> 00:20:11,778 Don't fucking hit me again. 350 00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:15,330 Have they contacted you? Made demands? 351 00:20:15,420 --> 00:20:17,411 The whole half million. 352 00:20:18,820 --> 00:20:20,014 Are you winding me up? 353 00:20:20,100 --> 00:20:23,172 Nol... Please! 354 00:20:23,260 --> 00:20:26,616 I'll talk to some folk. Ask around. 355 00:20:26,700 --> 00:20:30,613 See if anyone's heard anything. You told the wife, told the police? 356 00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:31,769 No. 357 00:20:31,860 --> 00:20:34,738 Don't. She'll only panic and they'll only cock it up. 358 00:20:34,820 --> 00:20:38,813 And from my experience, neither of those has a happy ending. 359 00:20:38,900 --> 00:20:40,970 Anybody asks, 360 00:20:41,060 --> 00:20:43,415 he's staying with a school friend, all right? 361 00:20:43,500 --> 00:20:45,218 All right. 362 00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:50,178 Terrible fuckin' world we live in, Gallagher. 363 00:20:50,260 --> 00:20:51,579 I'll keep you posted. 364 00:20:55,660 --> 00:20:56,979 MOANING 365 00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:00,256 MOANS 366 00:21:05,780 --> 00:21:09,090 - Fuck! - What? What is it? 367 00:21:12,820 --> 00:21:16,369 You actually... fucked Frank Gallagher? 368 00:21:18,620 --> 00:21:24,297 Oh. I thought you said you were cool with everything. 369 00:21:26,580 --> 00:21:29,936 Yeah. OK, I did. 370 00:21:30,020 --> 00:21:32,329 Jesus, Karen. 371 00:21:32,420 --> 00:21:34,695 What happened to some quality control, hey? 372 00:21:34,780 --> 00:21:38,216 I know! I know. 373 00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:40,370 It's not the best idea I ever had. 374 00:21:46,900 --> 00:21:48,413 But then I met you. 375 00:21:51,180 --> 00:21:53,057 Everything changed... 376 00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,214 ...became better... 377 00:22:01,300 --> 00:22:03,018 became new. 378 00:22:03,100 --> 00:22:05,295 Oh, don't do this. 379 00:22:05,380 --> 00:22:07,052 Don't make me feel like that. 380 00:22:07,140 --> 00:22:08,573 I'm sorry. 381 00:22:21,140 --> 00:22:23,335 - No. - Didn't say anything. 382 00:22:23,420 --> 00:22:25,251 You didn't need to. 383 00:22:25,340 --> 00:22:29,174 - We're not having sex. - But we're gay. 384 00:22:29,260 --> 00:22:32,935 It's not a club. There aren't rules. 385 00:22:33,020 --> 00:22:34,055 I got you a bed. 386 00:22:34,140 --> 00:22:36,210 You also got me arrested. 387 00:22:40,100 --> 00:22:41,579 Go to sleep! 388 00:23:03,620 --> 00:23:06,054 (Patrick) 'Sorry about the cloak and dagger act.' 389 00:23:06,140 --> 00:23:07,937 Didn't want to alarm the family. 390 00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:09,851 You managed to find anything out? 391 00:23:09,940 --> 00:23:11,419 I tried, Francis. 392 00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:13,218 Believe me, I tried. 393 00:23:16,060 --> 00:23:17,175 Where is he? 394 00:23:17,260 --> 00:23:19,899 I don't know anything, Paddy! 395 00:23:19,980 --> 00:23:21,299 Just tell me what you know. 396 00:23:21,380 --> 00:23:22,699 I don't know anything. 397 00:23:24,900 --> 00:23:28,097 I tried. Nothing. 398 00:23:28,180 --> 00:23:29,898 Not a word. 399 00:23:33,180 --> 00:23:37,173 Unfortunately, I think your best option is to grit your teeth 400 00:23:37,260 --> 00:23:39,649 and pay the bastards. 401 00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:43,092 What if? 402 00:23:44,700 --> 00:23:47,373 What if I don't pay them? 403 00:23:47,460 --> 00:23:50,691 This is your son we're talking about. 404 00:23:50,780 --> 00:23:53,089 You've got half a million quid. 405 00:23:57,180 --> 00:23:58,408 You disgust me. 406 00:24:28,140 --> 00:24:30,813 QUIET VOICES 407 00:24:30,900 --> 00:24:32,458 Do you want a smoothie? 408 00:24:58,100 --> 00:25:00,375 Debbie! 409 00:25:05,980 --> 00:25:09,495 Your mam's lost her keys. D'you know where the spare set is? 410 00:25:11,100 --> 00:25:12,294 Cheers. 411 00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:14,974 Wait. You can't leave. 412 00:25:15,060 --> 00:25:16,413 What? 413 00:25:16,500 --> 00:25:19,572 You might tell someone what you've seen, and that'd ruin everything. 414 00:25:19,660 --> 00:25:20,809 What you talking about? 415 00:25:23,860 --> 00:25:25,691 Debbie... what have you done? 416 00:25:30,140 --> 00:25:31,459 Why do you have to spoil everything? 417 00:25:31,540 --> 00:25:33,212 I'm not! He hasn't won the lottery! 418 00:25:33,300 --> 00:25:35,131 It's half a million quid, Debbie. 419 00:25:35,220 --> 00:25:36,892 It doesn't matter how much it was. 420 00:25:36,980 --> 00:25:39,938 It doesn't exist. He's just hurting us all by pretending it does. 421 00:25:40,020 --> 00:25:42,580 You mean you're pissed off and want to teach him a lesson. 422 00:25:42,660 --> 00:25:44,616 Mum maxed out Norma's credit card. 423 00:25:44,700 --> 00:25:46,213 We could lose the house. Yeah. I am pissed off. 424 00:25:46,300 --> 00:25:48,655 You think you know better than everyone else! 425 00:25:48,740 --> 00:25:50,935 Cos I do. And I'll prove it to you. 426 00:25:51,020 --> 00:25:53,853 Chesney? I need you to do it one more time. 427 00:25:53,940 --> 00:25:54,895 Fuck's sake. 428 00:25:54,980 --> 00:25:57,050 We're moving on to Phase Three. 429 00:25:58,540 --> 00:25:59,734 Cool. 430 00:26:02,100 --> 00:26:05,137 MOBILE PHONE RINGS 431 00:26:05,220 --> 00:26:06,175 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah? 432 00:26:06,260 --> 00:26:08,774 We want the money, Frank. 433 00:26:08,860 --> 00:26:10,976 Yeah, the money, of course, no problem. 434 00:26:11,060 --> 00:26:13,210 Tell the truth or we'll hurt your kid. 435 00:26:13,300 --> 00:26:16,417 I am. Just... Fucking just don't touch him. 436 00:26:16,500 --> 00:26:20,778 I don't believe you, Frank. Say goodbye to his little finger. 437 00:26:20,860 --> 00:26:22,293 Ahh, ahh, ahh! 438 00:26:22,380 --> 00:26:23,335 LIAM MOANS 439 00:26:23,420 --> 00:26:25,729 Oh, fuck, don't! 440 00:26:25,820 --> 00:26:28,254 'Don't hurt him... don't hurt... ' 441 00:26:28,340 --> 00:26:29,375 There was no money! 442 00:26:29,460 --> 00:26:32,372 'There never was. I lied, all right! 443 00:26:32,460 --> 00:26:34,291 'I just... ' 444 00:26:37,380 --> 00:26:38,813 Please! 445 00:26:38,900 --> 00:26:40,811 Hello? 446 00:26:54,580 --> 00:26:55,535 Hey. 447 00:26:58,980 --> 00:27:01,619 I stayed at Mum and Dad's. Sofa job. 448 00:27:01,700 --> 00:27:03,577 Don't remember asking. 449 00:27:04,500 --> 00:27:07,014 Look, I don't want to ruin everything. 450 00:27:07,100 --> 00:27:09,170 You going to be normal, then? 451 00:27:09,260 --> 00:27:13,458 Well, I'm gonna try. Just let my head get bent out of shape. 452 00:27:17,260 --> 00:27:19,649 While you were away being all mean 'n' moody, 453 00:27:19,740 --> 00:27:21,890 toilets in the ladies went a bit Exorcist. 454 00:27:21,980 --> 00:27:24,130 But don't worry, got a plumber coming, 455 00:27:24,220 --> 00:27:28,372 nothing to worry about, feel free to carry on with your James Dean act. 456 00:27:30,060 --> 00:27:31,459 James Dean? 457 00:27:31,540 --> 00:27:33,258 Wasn't meant as a compliment. 458 00:27:33,340 --> 00:27:35,490 Yeah, well, I'm taking it as one. 459 00:27:38,580 --> 00:27:40,969 You're a twat, Jamie Maguire. 460 00:27:52,860 --> 00:27:55,499 Better put Dad out his misery. Just hope he's learnt his lesson. 461 00:27:57,380 --> 00:28:00,338 Uh-oh. That is not good. 462 00:28:00,420 --> 00:28:02,411 Just act natural. You know nothing. 463 00:28:02,500 --> 00:28:04,331 Don't go! 464 00:28:04,420 --> 00:28:06,251 Might be for something else. 465 00:28:06,340 --> 00:28:08,900 It's not the first time we've had police here. 466 00:28:11,660 --> 00:28:13,491 Please let it be domestic violence. 467 00:28:18,740 --> 00:28:22,096 We're going to do everything we can to get him back. I promise you. 468 00:28:22,180 --> 00:28:23,135 DOOR CLOSES 469 00:28:23,220 --> 00:28:25,859 Sorry, Debbie, you can't be in here. 470 00:28:41,620 --> 00:28:45,135 I thank you so much for coming in at such short notice. 471 00:28:45,220 --> 00:28:48,656 - No worries, love. - I've turned the water off like you told me to. 472 00:28:50,980 --> 00:28:52,459 God, I've missed that arse. 473 00:29:01,780 --> 00:29:02,735 What you doing? 474 00:29:04,380 --> 00:29:05,938 Sorting through your coupons. 475 00:29:06,020 --> 00:29:09,171 Kind of therapeutic. 476 00:29:09,260 --> 00:29:10,739 You don't need to do that. 477 00:29:10,820 --> 00:29:13,857 Well, if it wasn't for you, we'd have no food in the fridge, 478 00:29:13,940 --> 00:29:18,491 would we? Like a little Mussolini, making all the trains run on time. 479 00:29:18,580 --> 00:29:19,774 Thanks. 480 00:29:21,380 --> 00:29:24,577 - It'll be all right. - Fucking, no, it... 481 00:29:24,660 --> 00:29:26,537 It won't, Debs. Not this time. 482 00:29:31,140 --> 00:29:33,608 It's all my fault. 483 00:29:33,700 --> 00:29:38,376 "Whomever God wishes to destroy, he first makes proud." 484 00:29:38,460 --> 00:29:41,770 I drew them all in with me fool's gold and then... 485 00:29:41,860 --> 00:29:43,930 you know, they took away... 486 00:29:47,500 --> 00:29:50,298 ...one of me real treasures. 487 00:29:53,220 --> 00:29:54,369 Liam's next door. 488 00:29:54,460 --> 00:29:56,690 What? 489 00:29:56,780 --> 00:30:01,012 He's fine. Five fingers, each hand. Ten fingers in all. 490 00:30:01,100 --> 00:30:04,012 Unless you're one of them people who don't count thumbs. 491 00:30:04,100 --> 00:30:06,489 What are you talking about? 492 00:30:06,580 --> 00:30:09,299 It was me. I kidnapped him. 493 00:30:15,620 --> 00:30:17,656 You'd kidnap your own brother? 494 00:30:17,740 --> 00:30:19,856 Only cos I wanted you to tell the truth. 495 00:30:20,900 --> 00:30:23,539 Have you any idea what you've put me through?! 496 00:30:23,620 --> 00:30:25,133 Your fucking mother through? 497 00:30:25,220 --> 00:30:28,371 No, Debbie. No, no. You've gone too far this time. 498 00:30:28,460 --> 00:30:29,654 I was only trying to help. 499 00:30:29,740 --> 00:30:33,289 You're just interfering, telling me what to do, as per fucking usual. 500 00:30:33,380 --> 00:30:34,779 So what you gonna do? 501 00:30:34,860 --> 00:30:36,009 What? 502 00:30:36,100 --> 00:30:37,579 About it all, all these people, the police. 503 00:30:37,660 --> 00:30:40,015 That's not my fucking fault. 504 00:30:40,100 --> 00:30:44,332 Oh, no, no. It never is your fault, is it? You just stumble from moment 505 00:30:44,420 --> 00:30:47,412 to moment, leaving the rest of us to pick up your shit! 506 00:30:47,500 --> 00:30:49,855 Well, not any more. You're on your own! 507 00:30:51,220 --> 00:30:52,733 GROANS 508 00:30:58,100 --> 00:31:00,375 GROANS 509 00:31:00,460 --> 00:31:03,770 Dad'll be able to sort this, get us out of here. 510 00:31:03,860 --> 00:31:06,328 Probably knock my teeth out at the same time, but... 511 00:31:06,420 --> 00:31:07,899 That doesn't help me, does it? 512 00:31:07,980 --> 00:31:11,655 I had a really cute guy lined up last night. 513 00:31:13,660 --> 00:31:15,537 - You've met someone else? - Yeah. 514 00:31:16,980 --> 00:31:18,379 You're in love with him. 515 00:31:18,460 --> 00:31:19,609 What? No! 516 00:31:22,980 --> 00:31:24,413 So... 517 00:31:27,940 --> 00:31:29,293 Any chance of a blow job? 518 00:31:29,380 --> 00:31:30,972 - Mickey! - Oh, just for fun. 519 00:31:31,060 --> 00:31:33,051 There's nothing else to do. 520 00:31:33,140 --> 00:31:35,370 Be good practice for you too. 521 00:31:36,460 --> 00:31:37,688 Please. 522 00:31:37,780 --> 00:31:40,294 - Don't say please. - Why? What's wrong with me? 523 00:31:40,380 --> 00:31:42,052 Nothing's wrong with you. 524 00:31:42,140 --> 00:31:45,735 Well, maybe you act a bit desperate. 525 00:31:45,820 --> 00:31:47,458 And you're a little needy. 526 00:31:47,540 --> 00:31:50,577 And you need to, y'know, just go out there. Have a life. 527 00:31:50,660 --> 00:31:52,651 Cos me and you, we're just mates. 528 00:31:52,740 --> 00:31:55,459 Nothing more. Just mates. 529 00:32:00,660 --> 00:32:02,651 Just mates. 530 00:32:03,740 --> 00:32:04,729 OK. 531 00:32:08,780 --> 00:32:09,974 A wank, then? 532 00:32:10,060 --> 00:32:12,449 I'm just gonna ignore you till your dad shows. 533 00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:19,576 DOOR OPENS 534 00:32:21,300 --> 00:32:22,289 Hello. 535 00:32:24,180 --> 00:32:26,933 Look, Debs. 536 00:32:29,780 --> 00:32:33,409 Cards on the old table. You know, nothing up the sleeve and that. 537 00:32:33,500 --> 00:32:35,934 - I need your help. - Course you do. 538 00:32:36,020 --> 00:32:38,534 But you're not getting it. 539 00:32:38,620 --> 00:32:40,929 Yeah. It's like... 540 00:32:42,020 --> 00:32:44,056 ...you know, the Wizard of Oz, right? 541 00:32:44,140 --> 00:32:49,214 I'm standing here, like the cowardly lion, tin man, gay scarecrow. 542 00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:51,291 You're that man behind the curtains, 543 00:32:51,380 --> 00:32:54,178 you know, working all the controls. 544 00:32:55,260 --> 00:32:57,649 SIGHS 545 00:33:00,260 --> 00:33:01,693 Basically, I'm fucked, love. 546 00:33:01,780 --> 00:33:03,179 Your head's bleeding. 547 00:33:04,260 --> 00:33:06,376 Was a good shot, weren't it, bull's-eye. 548 00:33:08,660 --> 00:33:09,615 Here... 549 00:33:14,300 --> 00:33:15,415 Thanks. 550 00:33:17,380 --> 00:33:20,053 So you need to find a way to get out 551 00:33:20,140 --> 00:33:22,290 of everyone thinking you've won half a million without them lynching you. 552 00:33:22,380 --> 00:33:23,938 Yeah, that'd be nice. 553 00:33:24,020 --> 00:33:26,250 And get Liam back without the police charging you for wasting time. 554 00:33:26,340 --> 00:33:27,773 Again, nice. 555 00:33:31,020 --> 00:33:32,658 Good luck with it, then. 556 00:33:46,660 --> 00:33:47,615 Giro. 557 00:33:47,700 --> 00:33:49,213 What? 558 00:33:49,300 --> 00:33:52,770 Every fortnight. In the housekeeping tin. Your giro. 559 00:33:56,660 --> 00:33:59,333 You know how many strings I had to pull to get you out of there? 560 00:33:59,420 --> 00:34:00,375 No. 561 00:34:00,460 --> 00:34:01,813 Five! 562 00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:03,253 Get in the car! 563 00:34:04,340 --> 00:34:05,932 What's the big hurry? 564 00:34:06,020 --> 00:34:07,612 Liam's got kidnapped. 565 00:34:07,700 --> 00:34:08,769 What! 566 00:34:08,860 --> 00:34:11,328 - No, no, it's OK. I was behind it all. - Jesus! 567 00:34:11,420 --> 00:34:14,617 Yeah, anyway, Carl still didn't believe me that Dad was full of it, 568 00:34:14,700 --> 00:34:16,497 so Chesney cut off his little finger. 569 00:34:16,580 --> 00:34:18,810 Why the fuck would he cut off Carl's finger? 570 00:34:18,900 --> 00:34:21,130 No, dumbo, he chopped off Liam's finger. 571 00:34:21,220 --> 00:34:22,289 Liam's? 572 00:34:22,380 --> 00:34:24,291 Didn't actually do it. 573 00:34:24,380 --> 00:34:27,895 Dad's called the police, and they're taking it really seriously. 574 00:34:27,980 --> 00:34:30,255 They're gonna stop at nothing to catch the kidnappers. 575 00:34:30,340 --> 00:34:32,296 - Kidnappers being you? - Bingo. 576 00:34:34,420 --> 00:34:36,729 I don't have a clue what's going on. 577 00:34:36,820 --> 00:34:40,290 Well, you better get an idea fast, otherwise we're F-U-C-K'd. 578 00:34:40,380 --> 00:34:43,019 All right, all right. Give me a minute here. 579 00:34:43,100 --> 00:34:44,533 D'you want me to start from the beginning? 580 00:34:44,620 --> 00:34:46,576 No. Please don't. 581 00:34:48,460 --> 00:34:49,973 Two nights. 582 00:34:50,060 --> 00:34:51,573 Two nights I turn my back. 583 00:34:51,660 --> 00:34:53,969 - Yeah, cheers for returning my calls. - I was in jail. 584 00:34:54,060 --> 00:34:55,459 It's not a competition, Ian. 585 00:34:57,260 --> 00:34:58,579 So what we gonna do? 586 00:34:58,660 --> 00:35:01,652 First thing you're gonna do is take it easy and stay low. 587 00:35:01,740 --> 00:35:03,731 You're already too close to it. 588 00:35:03,820 --> 00:35:05,970 But yeah, I've got an idea. 589 00:35:06,060 --> 00:35:09,291 Not sure it's the best idea ever, but it's the only one I've got. 590 00:35:09,380 --> 00:35:10,859 All right if I borrow this? 591 00:35:10,940 --> 00:35:13,249 You lot are fucking nuts, you know that? 592 00:35:13,340 --> 00:35:15,615 You know what you're doing, yeah? 593 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:17,531 Just stick to Ian's plan, OK? 594 00:35:17,620 --> 00:35:19,770 And maybe we won't all end up in jail. 595 00:35:19,860 --> 00:35:21,578 Make sure you don't fuck it up, 596 00:35:21,660 --> 00:35:24,857 the police are gonna be listening in this time. 597 00:35:24,940 --> 00:35:26,498 CHESNEY CLEARS THROAT 598 00:35:28,460 --> 00:35:31,657 PHONE RINGS 599 00:35:31,740 --> 00:35:32,729 It's them. 600 00:35:32,820 --> 00:35:34,697 PHONE RINGS 601 00:35:39,340 --> 00:35:41,376 - Go on, answer it. 602 00:35:41,460 --> 00:35:42,415 Hello? 603 00:35:42,500 --> 00:35:47,415 'Frank, listen carefully. This is what we want you to do.' 604 00:35:50,340 --> 00:35:53,776 Do the button up. Say something. 605 00:35:53,860 --> 00:35:55,498 - Something. - Loud and clear. 606 00:35:55,580 --> 00:35:58,458 Right. The moment you get your son, we're in. 607 00:35:58,540 --> 00:36:00,974 We'll take them down, make sure you get your money. 608 00:36:01,060 --> 00:36:05,258 No. I don't care about the money. You don't do anything. 609 00:36:05,340 --> 00:36:07,649 The only thing that matters is that we get Liam back. 610 00:36:07,740 --> 00:36:10,857 You going to let these scumbags walk away with half a million? 611 00:36:10,940 --> 00:36:12,612 You don't have children, do you? 612 00:36:12,700 --> 00:36:15,134 The money doesn't matter! 613 00:36:26,660 --> 00:36:27,775 Er... ladies? 614 00:36:27,860 --> 00:36:30,579 Oh, sorry, love. Official business. 615 00:36:30,660 --> 00:36:32,332 Plumber. 616 00:36:42,180 --> 00:36:44,978 Have to have a word with Ian about missing his shifts. 617 00:36:45,060 --> 00:36:46,288 What's with the plumber? 618 00:36:46,380 --> 00:36:47,893 What? 619 00:36:47,980 --> 00:36:51,973 Oh, yeah. He's... He's a mate of mine. 620 00:36:52,060 --> 00:36:54,449 We go way back. He said he'd take a look. 621 00:36:54,540 --> 00:36:55,893 I had somebody taking a look. 622 00:36:55,980 --> 00:36:57,652 Yeah, well, I decided to let him go. 623 00:36:57,740 --> 00:37:00,812 I just wanted to use someone I knew. 624 00:37:00,900 --> 00:37:02,811 I thought you said you were over this, 625 00:37:02,900 --> 00:37:05,778 and unless you've invented a time machine or something, 626 00:37:05,860 --> 00:37:07,088 I can't change things, can I? 627 00:37:07,180 --> 00:37:09,216 You know how many people I've been with? 628 00:37:09,300 --> 00:37:11,689 You can count on them one hand. 629 00:37:11,780 --> 00:37:14,772 Half a hand. Finger and thumb. 630 00:37:14,860 --> 00:37:16,532 So the only way you'll feel equal, 631 00:37:16,620 --> 00:37:19,657 feel comfortable, is if you sleep with the same amount of people? 632 00:37:19,740 --> 00:37:20,695 Well, go on, then. 633 00:37:20,780 --> 00:37:25,331 Go to Lillian's, take the cash card and don't stop until we're quits. 634 00:37:25,420 --> 00:37:28,537 What, you're telling me to go and sleep with a bunch of prozzies? 635 00:37:28,620 --> 00:37:32,090 I am telling you that I love you. 636 00:37:32,180 --> 00:37:35,616 And I will do whatever it takes to make this work. 637 00:37:35,700 --> 00:37:41,969 So whatever it takes for you to feel normal, just fucking do it. 638 00:37:42,060 --> 00:37:45,177 Now's probably a bad time, right? 639 00:37:45,260 --> 00:37:47,376 - Yeah. - Right. 640 00:37:54,220 --> 00:37:57,053 - The moment he gets the boy, we move in. - But Mrs Gallagher said... 641 00:37:57,140 --> 00:38:00,257 I know what she said, but this is our collar. 642 00:38:00,340 --> 00:38:03,776 No-one leaves that warehouse without us locking it down. 643 00:38:03,860 --> 00:38:08,172 Approaching the, uh, perimeter... now. 644 00:38:28,340 --> 00:38:29,898 RADIO CRACKLE 645 00:38:37,500 --> 00:38:38,728 Liam! Liam! 646 00:38:43,740 --> 00:38:45,970 What do you want? Whoa, whoa, whoa! 647 00:38:46,060 --> 00:38:48,654 It's gone tits up! Go! Go! Go! 648 00:38:51,620 --> 00:38:53,497 You slept with my wife! 649 00:38:53,580 --> 00:38:56,697 - Who the fuck's your wife? - Karen, you ignorant bastard! 650 00:38:56,780 --> 00:39:01,774 Oh, fucking... That's just ancient history, it's old news. 651 00:39:01,860 --> 00:39:04,613 I don't care if it was years ago. You're a dirty fucker. 652 00:39:04,700 --> 00:39:07,976 I might not be able to get every one of them, but I can start with you! 653 00:39:08,060 --> 00:39:10,893 - And what are you gonna do for an encore? - You what? 654 00:39:10,980 --> 00:39:13,255 After you've gone al! Captain Caveman on me, 655 00:39:13,340 --> 00:39:16,571 you going to run round the estate, beating all the others up, eh? 656 00:39:16,660 --> 00:39:19,015 Christ, you'll be busy for six months. Brilliant! 657 00:39:19,100 --> 00:39:22,649 Meanwhile, lickle wifey's home alone, wondering why she married such a catch. 658 00:39:22,740 --> 00:39:26,653 Look, you should just finish it, pal, if you hate her that much. 659 00:39:26,740 --> 00:39:28,173 I don't hate her. 660 00:39:30,060 --> 00:39:31,015 I love her. 661 00:39:31,100 --> 00:39:33,614 Oh, well, I've got tears in me eyes. 662 00:39:33,700 --> 00:39:35,292 You feel better after that, then? 663 00:39:35,380 --> 00:39:37,689 No. No, I don't. 664 00:39:37,780 --> 00:39:39,008 I think I've got issues. 665 00:39:39,100 --> 00:39:40,772 Welcome to the party. 666 00:39:41,940 --> 00:39:43,532 Aaaaaah! Gotcha! 667 00:39:43,620 --> 00:39:45,770 No, fucking... Just get off, just let him go, let him go! 668 00:39:45,860 --> 00:39:47,578 What? 669 00:39:48,780 --> 00:39:52,455 He's the big hero round here. He... He saved me life. 670 00:39:54,900 --> 00:39:56,458 It's empty! 671 00:39:56,540 --> 00:39:58,849 The bad guys went thataway. 672 00:39:58,940 --> 00:40:01,454 Come on! 673 00:40:05,740 --> 00:40:07,571 They got away! 674 00:40:07,660 --> 00:40:10,094 Right, Stan, you go that way. Tom, you're with me. 675 00:40:20,660 --> 00:40:22,218 I'm really sorry. 676 00:40:33,620 --> 00:40:35,815 It's just... 677 00:40:35,900 --> 00:40:37,891 all those things I don't know about you... 678 00:40:37,980 --> 00:40:40,175 Nearly drove me crazy. 679 00:40:42,260 --> 00:40:43,852 Here. 680 00:40:47,860 --> 00:40:51,648 That's a list of everybody I've slept with. So you know everything. 681 00:40:51,740 --> 00:40:55,733 I'm not ashamed of me past, and I'm not disgusted by it either. 682 00:40:57,540 --> 00:40:58,814 I am glad it led to you. 683 00:41:00,740 --> 00:41:03,459 That's total honesty. 684 00:41:11,220 --> 00:41:12,539 Come here. 685 00:41:18,700 --> 00:41:23,091 Hey, that plumber you hired tried to hit on me. 686 00:41:23,180 --> 00:41:25,455 Had to kick his arse out the door. 687 00:41:25,540 --> 00:41:27,929 Oh, well, well. Prodigal returns. 688 00:41:28,020 --> 00:41:30,978 - You've missed three shifts. - And almost fucked up our marriage. 689 00:41:31,060 --> 00:41:33,893 I'm sorry. What I said earlier, I overreacted. 690 00:41:33,980 --> 00:41:35,618 All right, mate. We'll be fine. 691 00:41:35,700 --> 00:41:39,170 - Just got to get used to living with a slut. - She has changed a lot. 692 00:41:39,260 --> 00:41:41,137 I meant you, gayboy. 693 00:41:41,220 --> 00:41:45,896 (Frank) Hey, Calvin Klein! There's folk dying of thirst out here. 694 00:41:51,980 --> 00:41:54,494 Oh! 695 00:41:54,820 --> 00:41:57,937 I need to clear my credit card, Frank. Where's the money? 696 00:41:59,340 --> 00:42:01,490 Money? Right. 697 00:42:01,580 --> 00:42:03,252 Dad. 698 00:42:03,340 --> 00:42:05,092 Tell them the truth. 699 00:42:07,500 --> 00:42:09,695 Will you all just shut up? 700 00:42:21,820 --> 00:42:24,254 That'll bring you luck, that, love. 701 00:42:27,100 --> 00:42:30,456 - Really? - Yeah. 702 00:42:32,820 --> 00:42:36,369 I stand before you today not as a man, 703 00:42:36,460 --> 00:42:40,453 but as a father of a very special girl, who... 704 00:42:40,540 --> 00:42:43,532 The point is that... 705 00:42:46,020 --> 00:42:47,738 ...I didn't win the lottery. 706 00:42:47,820 --> 00:42:50,857 GASPS OF DISAPPOINTMENT 707 00:42:50,940 --> 00:42:53,693 (Man) Typical fucking Gallagher, in't it? 708 00:42:53,780 --> 00:42:55,054 There's no cash. 709 00:42:58,220 --> 00:43:01,530 Not that truth, the other truth! 710 00:43:01,620 --> 00:43:04,851 The kidnapping one! Half a million ransom. 711 00:43:04,940 --> 00:43:06,419 Right. 712 00:43:07,500 --> 00:43:08,569 Idiot! 713 00:43:16,100 --> 00:43:21,538 New tin. Got a key and a lock and all. Can't trust anyone round here. 714 00:43:29,860 --> 00:43:31,976 Don't worry, you'll still get your pocket money. 715 00:43:32,060 --> 00:43:34,858 Oh, Debs. 716 00:43:34,940 --> 00:43:37,852 I come from nothing, and I'll end up with nothing. 717 00:43:37,940 --> 00:43:41,979 You know, what's in between doesn't matter. Have a penny, lose a penny. 718 00:43:42,060 --> 00:43:44,779 Hakuna matata. That's me. 719 00:43:47,500 --> 00:43:49,650 Dad... 720 00:43:49,740 --> 00:43:51,537 Spare key, please. 721 00:43:57,060 --> 00:43:59,176 Thank you. 722 00:44:10,700 --> 00:44:13,498 (Liam) 'Debbie says money really can't buy you happiness. 723 00:44:17,100 --> 00:44:20,058 'Doesn't mean I wouldn't like to try it every once in a while. 724 00:44:21,660 --> 00:44:24,697 'It can, however, buy you a cappuccino machine, 725 00:44:24,780 --> 00:44:27,897 'a widescreen telly, a trip to Disneyland, 726 00:44:27,980 --> 00:44:32,019 'those wrestling action figures which are kind of gay, but I want them, 727 00:44:32,100 --> 00:44:36,093 'and a pair of trainers that light up when you walk would be cool. 728 00:44:36,180 --> 00:44:39,058 'Maybe even some roller blades. 729 00:44:39,140 --> 00:44:41,335 'Oh, fireworks, that'd be mint.' 730 00:45:27,420 --> 00:45:29,092 CLOCK TICKS 731 00:45:29,142 --> 00:45:33,692 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 53971

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