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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:06,200 Now nobody's saying the Chatsworth Estate is the Garden of Eden, 2 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,520 but it's been a good home to us, to me, 3 00:00:08,559 --> 00:00:13,360 Frank Gallagher, and me kids who l'm proud of, cos every single one of 'em 4 00:00:13,399 --> 00:00:16,360 reminds me a little of me. 5 00:00:16,399 --> 00:00:22,080 They can all think for themselves, which they've got me to thank for. 6 00:00:22,119 --> 00:00:25,760 Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite, which is why nobody calls him Phillip any more. 7 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:30,120 lan, a lot like his mam, which is handy for the others cos she's disappeared into thin air. 8 00:00:30,159 --> 00:00:34,400 And Carl. We daren't let him grow his hair for two reasons - 9 00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:37,960 it makes it stand on end and makes him Iook like Toyah, and nits love him. 10 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:41,080 Debbie - sent by God, total angel. 11 00:00:41,119 --> 00:00:44,120 You've to check your change but she'll go miles out of her way 12 00:00:44,159 --> 00:00:45,840 to do you a favour, 13 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,600 plus lickle Liam, who's gonna be a star some day. 14 00:00:48,639 --> 00:00:54,280 Sheila, me bird, couldn't be happier. One plate short of a full set, like. 15 00:00:54,319 --> 00:00:57,480 And fantastic neighbours Kev and Veronica - lend ya anything, 16 00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:58,880 well, almost anything. 17 00:00:58,919 --> 00:01:03,560 Carol and Marty - the lodgers from hell. Last of the lonely hearts 18 00:01:03,599 --> 00:01:06,680 and a psychologist's wet dream. Still, nobody's pe_ect. 19 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:11,080 But all of 'em to a man know first and foremost 20 00:01:11,119 --> 00:01:16,680 one of the most vital necessities in life is they know how to throw a party! 21 00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:17,960 Heh, heh, heh, scatter! 22 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:27,280 (Sheila) 'l was always a terrible sleeper before l met Frank. 23 00:01:27,319 --> 00:01:30,600 'l used to have a recurring nightmare where l was trapped in a roll of 24 00:01:30,639 --> 00:01:34,520 'carpet when l was due to turn on the Christmas lights in Copenhagen, 25 00:01:34,559 --> 00:01:36,280 'home of the Little Mermaid. 26 00:01:38,399 --> 00:01:41,240 'lt's such a lovely story, the Little Mermaid. 27 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:44,240 'She loved the prince so much 28 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,240 'she agreed to lose her voice so she could marry him. 29 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:49,720 'Since Frank and l have been an item 30 00:01:49,760 --> 00:01:53,360 'l haven't had the nightmare once. 31 00:01:53,399 --> 00:01:57,000 'l like to think it stopped because once l'd met Frank, 32 00:01:57,040 --> 00:01:59,960 'all my dreams have come true. Well, almost all. 33 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:05,680 'The only thing l've got left to dream about is the day l say ''l do'' 34 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:10,080 l've put the truncheon on a boil wash. 35 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:55,120 Oh, fucking Countdown. 36 00:03:15,359 --> 00:03:16,520 Don't be long, babe. 37 00:03:24,119 --> 00:03:26,320 What the fuck you doing there? 38 00:03:26,359 --> 00:03:28,040 Out of supplies. 39 00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:32,200 - Bingo. - Those are mine, actually! 40 00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:35,800 Fuck om. Expiry date June '06? 41 00:03:35,839 --> 00:03:38,160 l don't think so. 42 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:47,960 lt's a two-slice limit on toast per person. GROANING AND GRUNTING 43 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:52,680 OtheM/ise the bread budget's just a big joke. Hello? 44 00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:55,360 Yeah, more toast, ta. 45 00:03:55,679 --> 00:03:58,640 - What you doing sleeping outside? - Ask Carl. 46 00:03:58,679 --> 00:04:01,000 - Have you had a fight? (lan) Only with himself. 47 00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:02,440 - Oi! - Good night, Carl? 48 00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:04,480 Surprised you got a wink of sleep. 49 00:04:07,359 --> 00:04:08,400 < Burn! 50 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:10,520 Shit! Fire! 51 00:04:10,559 --> 00:04:12,440 Bloody hell, fire! 52 00:04:14,599 --> 00:04:16,560 Oi! 53 00:04:16,599 --> 00:04:18,240 What was that in aid of? 54 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:20,560 l'm sorry, Carol. l just reacted. 55 00:04:20,599 --> 00:04:23,640 l thought it were Marty. What the fuck are you burning? 56 00:04:23,679 --> 00:04:29,120 Memories. Suit of my dead husband. Betrayed from beyond the grave. 57 00:04:29,159 --> 00:04:32,800 Man-made fibre. Drip dry. 58 00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:39,480 Shall l make comee or will l be disturbing the crime scene? 59 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,560 l know what it's like in CSl. 60 00:04:41,599 --> 00:04:46,440 lt's OK, Sheila. Have you had chance to sort out what's missing? 61 00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:49,800 That's the funny thing. l don't know if they were disturbed or... 62 00:04:49,839 --> 00:04:53,480 Oh! Oh, my God! They've taken my Countdown mug! 63 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:54,640 Frank! 64 00:04:54,679 --> 00:04:57,640 Bloody...Oh, bloody hell! 65 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,160 Well, he definitely came in the bedroom. 66 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:04,840 Looks like he tried to disguise himself an' all. 67 00:05:04,879 --> 00:05:08,160 Oh, no... That's mine. 68 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:16,760 Fuckin' idiot! 69 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:21,360 lf you'd left that out, l'd probably have thought it was a truncheon. 70 00:05:21,399 --> 00:05:22,600 That's funny, 71 00:05:22,639 --> 00:05:24,360 you've just broken my dream. 72 00:05:24,399 --> 00:05:26,120 Oh, Tony, love. 73 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:29,440 lt's an easy mistake to make. 74 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:32,800 For me, you mean. It's no wonder girls, women, don't fancy us. 75 00:05:32,839 --> 00:05:36,520 lt's like they smell it on me, Sheila. It's no joke at my age. 76 00:05:36,559 --> 00:05:38,960 Oh... 77 00:05:45,919 --> 00:05:47,400 Thieves! 78 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:49,920 Hi. 79 00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:54,320 All right, Carol, love? 80 00:05:54,359 --> 00:05:56,720 Looks like your Marty's getting on OK. 81 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:58,480 Suits uniform, don't he? 82 00:06:02,599 --> 00:06:04,240 Carol, what's wrong? 83 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:08,040 You of all people... Stay away from me! 84 00:06:08,079 --> 00:06:11,080 (Over radio) 'Shoplifter. Aisle two. Beige coat. Female 85 00:06:11,119 --> 00:06:14,240 Roger. Received. Proceeding to aisle two. 86 00:06:14,280 --> 00:06:17,000 Carol, what's wrong? What is it? 87 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:18,800 Her. 88 00:06:18,839 --> 00:06:21,000 - Carol? (Marty) Are you sure? Fuck. 89 00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:23,120 - She doesn't look someone who'd... - Stop her! 90 00:06:23,159 --> 00:06:24,320 (Lillian) Carol? 91 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,160 Carol? 92 00:06:29,119 --> 00:06:32,280 What are you doing, Marty? Let go of me! 93 00:06:32,319 --> 00:06:33,720 (Security guard) Keep hold of her! 94 00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:37,280 For the love of God, l haven't done anything! 95 00:06:37,319 --> 00:06:39,360 Mum! Shoplifter! 96 00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:43,520 You!! 97 00:06:57,720 --> 00:06:59,720 Well, they're not pressing charges. 98 00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:02,880 Five pots of Chicken Tonight and a lemon zester. 99 00:07:02,919 --> 00:07:04,960 What were you playing at, Mum? 100 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:08,280 lt's too much to expect a bit of moral support from me own flesh and blood. 101 00:07:08,319 --> 00:07:10,360 lt was Marty's first day! 102 00:07:10,399 --> 00:07:13,840 When did he ever keep a job for more than five minutes? 103 00:07:13,879 --> 00:07:16,600 Anyway, if you're looking for somebody to blame, blame her. 104 00:07:16,639 --> 00:07:18,800 Penny to a pound it was her that tipped om the manager. 105 00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,360 Lillian? She's your best mate. 106 00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:23,000 Why would she do a thing like that? 107 00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:31,840 l found it in the pocket of that suit of your dad's. 108 00:07:36,399 --> 00:07:38,200 Christ! 109 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:41,640 You always said you thought he were dipping his wick Jubilee year. 110 00:07:41,679 --> 00:07:43,880 Yeah, but with what's her name. 111 00:07:43,919 --> 00:07:45,600 Terrible teeth. 112 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:47,360 You were too young to remember. 113 00:07:50,359 --> 00:07:55,120 We were as thick as thieves, Veronica - Lillian and Brendan and me and your dad. 114 00:07:55,159 --> 00:07:56,360 Oh, Mum. 115 00:07:56,399 --> 00:07:59,960 Oh, don't worry about me. l'm not one to sit idly by. 116 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:02,080 'As ye sow, so shall ye reap 117 00:08:02,119 --> 00:08:04,320 You mark my words. 118 00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:09,320 Yes, hello. l'd like to report someone for benefit fraud. 119 00:08:09,359 --> 00:08:13,120 Chatsworth Estate, Meadowbank Road. 120 00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:18,800 Yes, that's right. Number...28. 121 00:08:25,079 --> 00:08:27,840 Fuckin' scum. 122 00:08:27,879 --> 00:08:31,080 Benefit fraud? Who'd they think they're having on? 123 00:08:31,119 --> 00:08:32,760 That's Big Brother, innit? 124 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:35,560 OM/ell, 1984. 125 00:08:35,599 --> 00:08:39,280 Sex crime! Sex crime! Course, poor bugger'd know all about that. 126 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:43,560 George OM/ell, real name Eric Blair. 127 00:08:43,599 --> 00:08:46,560 Lifelong socialist, so, no relation to Tony. 128 00:08:46,599 --> 00:08:48,360 f3.95, Frank. 129 00:08:48,399 --> 00:08:51,320 lt's the thin end of the wedge. Kev, what is it? 130 00:08:51,359 --> 00:08:53,720 lt's roots to whaddyamacallit. 131 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:57,920 lf you drive a wedge into the community you can do what you like. 132 00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:00,520 lt's how Hitler started. 133 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:02,280 (Frank) They're after Lillian now. 134 00:09:02,319 --> 00:09:05,480 Fucking twat. Some cunt called in, didn't they? 135 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:10,000 Looked at that poster and thought, ''l know, l'll fuck her up.'' Why? 136 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:12,080 (COUGHS) 137 00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,560 All right, Mum? 138 00:09:13,599 --> 00:09:15,360 Peanuts. 139 00:09:15,399 --> 00:09:18,320 Keep repeating on me. Should've known better. 140 00:09:18,359 --> 00:09:20,000 They're not even paying! 141 00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:21,840 ls that what it's come to? 142 00:09:21,879 --> 00:09:25,760 Cos if it is, fuckin' Bin Laden's won, hasn't he? 143 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,520 Agincourt, Dunkirk, Live Aid... Bomb the lot, may as well start again. 144 00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:33,360 l hear there's a push on. It's not just them posters, Frank, 145 00:09:33,399 --> 00:09:35,200 they're not relying on anybody calling in. 146 00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:36,800 As if anybody would. 147 00:09:36,839 --> 00:09:38,360 They are. 148 00:09:38,399 --> 00:09:41,360 No, apparently they're looking into everyone round here who's claiming. 149 00:09:41,399 --> 00:09:42,440 Well, l'm fucked then! 150 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:44,840 You and half the fuckin' estate. 151 00:09:44,879 --> 00:09:45,960 We're om! 152 00:09:49,359 --> 00:09:52,280 Where did you hear that then, Mum? 153 00:09:52,319 --> 00:09:54,160 Down the community centre. 154 00:09:59,319 --> 00:10:01,440 As soon as you can, yeah. 155 00:10:05,399 --> 00:10:07,760 Are you not a bit worried, Frank? 156 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:11,960 Plight of the common man, mate. It's never over till the fat lady fucks you over. 157 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,760 Anyway, fuckers can't get me, can they? l'm dead. 158 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:18,760 Yeah, but haven't you and Lillian been claiming for her Brendan? 159 00:10:25,399 --> 00:10:29,160 Waste of money that was. Went down like a fuckin' lead balloon. 160 00:10:37,599 --> 00:10:39,280 Woo-hoo! 161 00:10:39,319 --> 00:10:41,440 Right, guys. 162 00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,480 Half the estate are scamming it. They're ours for the taking. 163 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:44,520 Fucking parasites! 164 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:47,080 < You fit then? Let's go! 165 00:10:48,599 --> 00:10:50,160 Let's knock on every door. 166 00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:13,720 Carl! It's Mrs Pierce for yer! > 167 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:16,680 What's she want? 168 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,720 Can you ask her what she wants? 169 00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:20,920 What did your last slave die of? 170 00:11:29,919 --> 00:11:32,440 What've they been feeding yer, Baby Bio? 171 00:11:32,479 --> 00:11:34,280 We've had a call from the Social. 172 00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:35,360 Another one? 173 00:11:35,399 --> 00:11:37,560 Thought we'd sorted it Iast time. Can you come? 174 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,200 Yeah, whatever. 175 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:40,240 Still a tenner? 176 00:11:54,919 --> 00:11:56,600 Now then. 177 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:58,720 Can you confirm that there is a child 178 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:04,160 under 18, permanently resident at your address, 26 Meadowbank Road? 179 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:05,240 Yes, we can. 180 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:08,840 And that you are the parent or approved guardian of that child? 181 00:12:08,879 --> 00:12:10,560 Last time we looked. Eh, Dad? 182 00:12:12,479 --> 00:12:14,160 That's a yes, then... 183 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:18,960 And you are currently claiming child benefit for Nathan Andrew Pierce. 184 00:12:18,999 --> 00:12:20,680 That's correct. 185 00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,280 He's a big lad for ten, isn't he? 186 00:12:22,319 --> 00:12:24,280 Don't know where he came from. 187 00:12:24,319 --> 00:12:26,440 New pair of trainers every five minutes. 188 00:12:31,839 --> 00:12:33,520 Yep, that's secure. 189 00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:36,800 You've done a good job. They won't be bothering you again. 190 00:12:36,839 --> 00:12:40,520 Taught myself to be handy with a power tool. Never looked back. 191 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,600 Never really got into DIY myself. 192 00:12:55,519 --> 00:12:58,000 l'm too quick, right? 193 00:12:58,039 --> 00:13:00,720 l'm in there and l'm trying to stop meself... 194 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:03,880 think of all the teams ever managed by Graeme Souness, 195 00:13:03,919 --> 00:13:07,200 or think of fucking Graeme Souness, but it's like a road accident, 196 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:09,720 and l'm flooring the brakes but nothing stops me 197 00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:12,640 and yeah. Through the windscreen. Gone in 60 seconds. 198 00:13:12,680 --> 00:13:15,400 Five, if l'm lucky. 199 00:13:15,439 --> 00:13:17,840 No-one's exactly coming back for more. 200 00:13:17,879 --> 00:13:19,480 Oh, Tony love. 201 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:23,320 Squeeze technique, works like a charm! 202 00:13:23,359 --> 00:13:25,800 Eddie, Karen's dad, he was a ten-second wonder 203 00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:27,440 when we first got together. 204 00:13:29,439 --> 00:13:31,840 And you're practically family, aren't yer? 205 00:13:36,879 --> 00:13:39,000 Better now, 206 00:13:39,039 --> 00:13:41,880 that's better, that's right.. 207 00:13:41,919 --> 00:13:44,160 Ahh.. arrgh... Fucking hell, Sheila! 208 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:48,000 Oh, sorry, sorry, don't know me own strength. 209 00:13:48,039 --> 00:13:49,720 OK? 210 00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:52,240 Yeah.. OK... 211 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:01,080 l got Eddie up to a good five minutes before he had to move 212 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:04,560 into the spare room. That was a wedding that should never have been. 213 00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:06,200 l knew the moment l woke up - 214 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:09,720 locum had to give me an injection to see me through the vows. 215 00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:13,200 You could see on the video, l thought l'd married the vicar. 216 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,920 Oops, sorry, sorry... Iapse of concentration. 217 00:14:15,959 --> 00:14:21,840 Never mind, it's a polyester blend, chuck it in the wash. 218 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:26,240 There you go. 219 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:34,800 Say you're the landlord, 220 00:14:34,839 --> 00:14:37,320 mock up the rent book and they can't do you for housing benefit. 221 00:14:37,359 --> 00:14:38,360 Nice one. 222 00:14:38,399 --> 00:14:40,520 He'll be a minute - it's cash in advance. 223 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,360 l told Emily you'd be her brother - they've got a visit. 224 00:14:43,399 --> 00:14:44,120 They paying? 225 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:45,960 Fuck om, she's my girlfriend. 226 00:14:45,999 --> 00:14:49,240 - It's a favour. - l don't mind. 227 00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:51,280 Ne_. > 228 00:14:54,399 --> 00:14:56,600 Now we've been claiming for our dad... 229 00:14:56,640 --> 00:14:59,760 Cheers. We'll soon set the buggers right, eh? 230 00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:02,400 You don't mind me borrowing your husband? 231 00:15:02,439 --> 00:15:06,120 Course you can. He's not, anyway... my husband that is... 232 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,800 Twisted fuckers are trying to catch you out - if we eat together... 233 00:15:08,839 --> 00:15:10,880 l'll get a bit of ham in. 234 00:15:10,919 --> 00:15:12,720 Eh, l knew l was right to marry you. 235 00:15:12,760 --> 00:15:15,880 Ta-ra. No Spam! 236 00:15:19,039 --> 00:15:22,480 l don't think l like it, Frank. Dead man's shoes. 237 00:15:22,519 --> 00:15:25,160 Terms and conditions. l've been getting half 238 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:28,200 of Brendan's disability, it's the least l can do, innit? 239 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:31,320 Doesn't feel right, cracking on you're married. 240 00:15:31,359 --> 00:15:33,600 lt's like tempting fate. 241 00:15:38,839 --> 00:15:43,720 So, Miss, erm Jackson, you've been reported as working behind the bar 242 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:46,840 here while claiming unemployment and housing benefit. 243 00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,120 Yeah. 244 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,480 Well, she helps me out from time to time, don't you, honey? > 245 00:15:51,519 --> 00:15:55,280 That's all. Wouldn't your girlfriend do the same for you? 246 00:15:55,319 --> 00:15:58,600 lf she did, and we were living together, she'd be unable to claim benefit. 247 00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:02,960 Under current regulations l'd be assumed to be supporting her. 248 00:16:02,999 --> 00:16:05,960 Well it's not our problem' that society 249 00:16:05,999 --> 00:16:09,760 won't recognise our relationship. We know how we feel. 250 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:12,920 Don't we, Karen, love? 251 00:16:24,839 --> 00:16:28,440 Oh, hi... Mum! He's here! 252 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,920 You've got to be Dom, my brother, yeah? The one with the ASBO. 253 00:16:37,959 --> 00:16:41,520 He lives in Stockport with me Dad, but they think he lives with us. 254 00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,640 This is Mum, me step-dad Troy... Lip's little brother. 255 00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:45,400 Hiya, love. 256 00:16:45,439 --> 00:16:48,120 MOBILE BEEPS You hear that? That is so shit. 257 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:49,480 Sounds all right to me. 258 00:16:49,519 --> 00:16:51,640 Yeah? No, can't for a bit. 259 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:54,920 l'll te_ you, right? It's a piece of shit. 260 00:16:54,959 --> 00:16:56,600 l totally fucking hate it. 261 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,400 Saw this 3G mobile when l was in town... 262 00:16:59,439 --> 00:17:02,320 lt's that lush, dead light but really good picture quality. 263 00:17:02,359 --> 00:17:05,040 Makes yours look like a fucking piece of shit. 264 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:07,320 Better start saving up then, hadn't yer? 265 00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:10,080 - Will you tell 'im? - Don't wind her up, Troy. 266 00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:14,080 Have you asked him if he wants a cappuccino? 267 00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:19,440 No, l'm all right, thanks. 268 00:17:19,479 --> 00:17:21,520 Fuck you looking at? 269 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,440 Thanks very much, Linda. 270 00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:35,120 Here you go. 271 00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:39,360 Cheers, Shirley. Ta very much. 272 00:17:39,399 --> 00:17:41,120 See you later, Emily! 273 00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:42,680 DOOR SLAMS 274 00:17:55,359 --> 00:17:56,840 lt's 3G yeah? 275 00:17:56,879 --> 00:17:58,360 Where's the video bit? 276 00:17:58,399 --> 00:17:59,600 l'll only charge a tenner. 277 00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:05,560 What you roping our Carl in for, Smeggy? 278 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,360 Nothing. l was helping him with his homework. 279 00:18:08,399 --> 00:18:12,120 Tell Debbie l won't be in later? l said l'd do a rent book... 280 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:15,000 l'm going round Emily's. 281 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:27,280 Ta-da! Brendan Tyler lives! 282 00:18:27,319 --> 00:18:28,880 Mind out on me floor! 283 00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:35,960 Mayday, mayday, mayday. 284 00:18:35,999 --> 00:18:37,680 Wish me luck, babes. 285 00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:41,480 What's he wearing all that for? 286 00:18:41,519 --> 00:18:44,000 Outside, outside, shoes on me floor! 287 00:18:44,039 --> 00:18:45,120 Oh, right! 288 00:18:51,959 --> 00:18:54,880 Lillian was round this morning. 289 00:18:54,919 --> 00:18:57,000 Frank's asked for some photos of her... 290 00:18:57,039 --> 00:18:58,520 Can you relax your grip a bit? 291 00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:00,160 Do you want to see why? 292 00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,720 Yeah. 293 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:05,760 Sheila, it's a bit tight. 294 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:08,120 They reckon it's for the Social. 295 00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:10,080 To add authenticity, Frank says. 296 00:19:10,120 --> 00:19:12,120 Makes you think though, doesn't it? 297 00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:14,400 Made me think anyway, seeing it. 298 00:19:14,439 --> 00:19:16,280 He's never asked me you know, Tony. 299 00:19:16,319 --> 00:19:19,040 That should be me there. It should be me! 300 00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:20,160 Aggghh, Sheila! 301 00:19:20,479 --> 00:19:22,480 l'm sorry... 302 00:19:22,519 --> 00:19:25,800 lt's just it would be the happiest day of my life. 303 00:19:25,839 --> 00:19:28,640 Well, maybe you should talk to Frank about it, 304 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:30,600 you know, tell him how you feel. 305 00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:33,400 l don't know... Pop the question yourself. 306 00:19:33,439 --> 00:19:34,520 Oh no. 307 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:38,080 lt's a man's job to propose, isn't it? 308 00:19:40,479 --> 00:19:43,440 Eh, minute and a half! That's a lot better. 309 00:19:43,479 --> 00:19:46,600 OK, you ready? 310 00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:48,880 Ready? Now. 311 00:19:48,919 --> 00:19:52,080 GASPS OF PLEASURE 312 00:19:56,720 --> 00:19:59,040 See? Much better. 313 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,920 Emily, l really wanted to erm.. 314 00:20:02,959 --> 00:20:05,080 l found this... l wanted to give it yer... 315 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:08,280 For Christ's sake, Carl, give it a rest will yer! 316 00:20:08,319 --> 00:20:10,120 l weren't doing om! 317 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:11,760 Sooner you get yourself laid, 318 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:14,000 sooner l can get a proper night's sleep! 319 00:20:14,039 --> 00:20:18,240 Whatsername, Jason Digby's sister, she'll suck anybody om. 320 00:20:18,280 --> 00:20:21,960 Yeah right! Even Jason Digby's sister's not that fucking desperate. 321 00:20:21,999 --> 00:20:23,440 l weren't doing om! 322 00:20:37,959 --> 00:20:42,040 l erm...wanted to give it yer. There isn't a video bit. 323 00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:43,240 Just got an upgrade. 324 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:48,120 Jada might give you a fiver for it. 325 00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,760 - It's mine, gimme. - l want a turn, come on. 326 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,040 You can't just fucking barge in here.. 327 00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:54,960 We're looking for Tom Lawson. 328 00:20:54,999 --> 00:20:57,960 Don't you lot ever talk to each other? We've sorted it out. 329 00:20:57,999 --> 00:20:59,960 Your son is here, Mrs Lawson? 330 00:20:59,999 --> 00:21:03,880 You're looking at him, now what's your fucking problem? 331 00:21:03,919 --> 00:21:06,360 - Fuck's that? - Condition of your bail, Dominic. 332 00:21:06,399 --> 00:21:07,880 Bail...what you on about? 333 00:21:07,919 --> 00:21:10,480 Maybe if you'd turned up for the hearing. 334 00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:13,680 Don't start on me, you sanctimonious old twat. 335 00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,920 Since the ASBO's failed to control your son, and he's now been 336 00:21:16,959 --> 00:21:21,640 charged with a crime, the court's taken the decision to tag him. 337 00:21:29,439 --> 00:21:33,880 You're mental, you are. They keep them things on for like, months. 338 00:21:33,919 --> 00:21:35,800 Dom'll be back ne_ week. 339 00:21:35,839 --> 00:21:39,320 He's gone to one of them Slawy countries with his dad, 340 00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:42,520 picking up knock-om DVDs. Hang on, Ellerby Road. 341 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:43,600 And? 342 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:45,560 l'm not allowed - tag'll go om. 343 00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:52,160 What if the tag goes om? 344 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:58,200 Cops'll get me. l'm supposed to stay at Emily's so they can check up. 345 00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:00,440 - Dream come true. - What's that supposed to mean? 346 00:22:00,479 --> 00:22:01,720 You fancy Emily. 347 00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:03,840 Fuck om! Do l fuck! 348 00:22:03,879 --> 00:22:07,560 Lip'll break up with her. He always does. Or they chuck him. 349 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:11,240 Bet yer anything. Thing is, though, a girl like Emily... 350 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:14,080 Learn to drive before you set your heart on the Ferrari. 351 00:22:14,120 --> 00:22:16,200 Do you think l need a car? 352 00:22:19,879 --> 00:22:22,920 ln the end right, there's either chemistry or there isn't. 353 00:22:22,959 --> 00:22:27,800 lt's all to do with the way you smell - they've tested it on chimps. 354 00:22:27,839 --> 00:22:29,600 Where the fuck are we? 355 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,200 ELECTRONIC TAG BEEPS 356 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:33,200 Shit! 357 00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:39,160 Frank! Frank! Sheila! Come over here! 358 00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,160 l think you're wanted. 359 00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:44,880 Come over here. Come on, come on. 360 00:22:44,919 --> 00:22:48,640 You all right love? l've got your money. 361 00:22:50,479 --> 00:22:53,120 Married for 40 years, never a cross fucking word! 362 00:22:56,439 --> 00:22:57,720 < Sheila... 363 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:01,160 Sheila. 364 00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,160 l don't have my face rubbed in it. 365 00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,600 She's not paying me! 366 00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:09,080 lt's got nom to do with you! 367 00:23:09,120 --> 00:23:11,240 No! Cos l'm nothing, l suppose... 368 00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:13,160 Just your bit on the side! 369 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,680 Course you are! 370 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:18,800 What? You don't think l'm... 371 00:23:20,319 --> 00:23:22,720 What? Lillian and me... 372 00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:26,280 Fuck om! 373 00:23:26,319 --> 00:23:29,480 Jesus! 20#20 vision, Sheila. 374 00:23:29,519 --> 00:23:33,520 Eh? And l'm in sound mind. 375 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,480 For fuck's sake, sort yourself out, will yer? 376 00:23:36,519 --> 00:23:39,120 l'm sorry. 377 00:23:39,160 --> 00:23:44,280 Hey. Come on, you know you shouldn't mix your drinks. 378 00:23:44,319 --> 00:23:46,200 l'm sorry. 379 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:48,240 l know you'd never be unfaithful. 380 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,840 l trust you with my life. 381 00:23:50,879 --> 00:23:53,920 lt's just all that being married stum, 382 00:23:53,959 --> 00:23:56,120 having it thrown back in my face. 383 00:23:57,680 --> 00:24:00,200 l know l shouldn't say it, but if l 384 00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:03,240 just had a ring on my finger... 385 00:24:04,879 --> 00:24:06,680 Sheila, love. 386 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:13,120 You know, fucking hell, you know there is nothing l would like more 387 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,720 than to call you 388 00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:19,440 Mrs Frank Gallagher. 389 00:24:19,479 --> 00:24:22,000 l don't know, no. 390 00:24:22,039 --> 00:24:26,080 But the... Yeah, yeah, 391 00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:31,280 but no, no, because you're still married to, you know, Eddie the Owl, 392 00:24:31,319 --> 00:24:35,280 l'm still married to Monica, plus there's the being dead thing. 393 00:24:38,319 --> 00:24:41,480 We're star-crossed! 394 00:24:41,519 --> 00:24:45,360 The love that dare not speak its name. 395 00:24:46,919 --> 00:24:49,600 No, l mean l don't blame yer... 396 00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,440 AARGHHH! 397 00:24:51,479 --> 00:24:55,440 Does me head in. There's not a day goes by... 398 00:24:55,479 --> 00:24:57,920 Yeah? 399 00:24:57,959 --> 00:25:00,920 But, you know l love you to bits, you know that. 400 00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,920 Oh, l'm sorry, Frank. 401 00:25:02,959 --> 00:25:04,800 l just thought, you know, 402 00:25:04,839 --> 00:25:06,520 cos you've never asked... 403 00:25:14,519 --> 00:25:16,360 Sheila Jackson, 404 00:25:16,399 --> 00:25:21,080 will you do me the honour of being my wife? 405 00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:25,960 To have and to hold, for richer and poorer and all that other shite, 406 00:25:25,999 --> 00:25:28,920 till death do us part... 407 00:25:28,959 --> 00:25:30,080 Yes! 408 00:25:30,120 --> 00:25:35,760 Oh, Frank, Frank, l love you so much! 409 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,280 l love you so much. 410 00:25:37,319 --> 00:25:39,320 Yeah, yeah, but... 411 00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:43,920 Monica's a mad Catholic bitch, you know, she'll never let us go... 412 00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:48,280 Let's go and tell everyone! l'm getting... 413 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:54,880 The Lord will sit in judgment, Lillian Tyler! 414 00:25:54,919 --> 00:25:57,320 Early menopause my arse... 415 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:00,600 What did you omer him, eh? something he couldn't get at home? 416 00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:01,760 Carol! 417 00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,360 The way l'd sumered with my piles over Veronica! 418 00:26:04,399 --> 00:26:06,880 That was told in confidence! 419 00:26:06,919 --> 00:26:07,880 lt were the 'TOs! 420 00:26:07,919 --> 00:26:09,440 Calm down! 421 00:26:09,479 --> 00:26:13,400 May as well leave it for now, eh? 422 00:26:18,359 --> 00:26:22,360 l can't say l'm overly impressed with the espresso. 423 00:26:22,399 --> 00:26:25,840 All right, Carl? l've put you a duvet down in Harley's room. 424 00:26:25,879 --> 00:26:27,840 When do you have to ring in again? 425 00:26:27,879 --> 00:26:29,120 Midnight, then seven. 426 00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:32,560 What's going on? Te_ed Lip three times this afternoon. 427 00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:35,240 Where the fuck is he? l haven't seen him for two days. 428 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:38,160 Dunno. He said he were coming round here last night. 429 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,920 - Probably got another lass on the go! - It's not fucking funny! 430 00:26:40,959 --> 00:26:43,200 All right! l was only having a laugh. 431 00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:46,400 That sensitive. Always been like that, haven't you? 432 00:26:46,439 --> 00:26:48,960 Must've got it wrong about Lip coming round. Wasn't really listening. 433 00:26:48,999 --> 00:26:52,640 We really do appreciate this. Don't we, Emily? 434 00:26:54,039 --> 00:26:55,640 DOOR SLAMS 435 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,880 l can see you looking, Lip. 436 00:26:58,919 --> 00:27:01,080 Don't know why blokes think you can't! 437 00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:03,400 Sorry. Only... 438 00:27:03,439 --> 00:27:05,960 l thought you were supposed to get big tits when you've had a baby? 439 00:27:05,999 --> 00:27:07,240 Fuck om! She's on bottles. 440 00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,280 Breast-feeding's better. 441 00:27:09,319 --> 00:27:11,200 You do it then. Hurts like fuck. 442 00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:12,840 Not natural, is it? 443 00:27:14,519 --> 00:27:18,240 You can come back and see her. Just didn't want to wake her up. 444 00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:20,480 Has an eppie every time l put her in her buggy. 445 00:27:20,519 --> 00:27:22,680 You're all right. l've got to... 446 00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:24,760 l said l'd go see someone. 447 00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:27,680 Oh, yeah? Still on with Emily Lawson? 448 00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:30,680 lt just, well, suits us both. 449 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,040 We don't talk or om. 450 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:34,480 To be honest, l think she finds me a bit boring. 451 00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:36,160 Don't knock her up and all. 452 00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,560 Might have learned me lesson on that one. 453 00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:55,400 The UB6T3. You needed to take a whole afternoon for that one. 454 00:27:55,439 --> 00:27:59,280 You can see where the biro ran out. Replaced by the UB96. 455 00:27:59,319 --> 00:28:02,480 Mrs Jackson, l can see you've kept excellent records. 456 00:28:02,519 --> 00:28:05,080 l'm satisfied everything's in order at your end. 457 00:28:05,120 --> 00:28:07,720 ls there anything you'd like to ask? 458 00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:11,120 How would notifying you of a change in my circumstances 459 00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:13,640 amect my eligibility to claim? 460 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:15,600 lf l were to get married... 461 00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,960 (Radio) 'Tony, come in please. 462 00:28:20,999 --> 00:28:23,680 'Domestic at 12 Minton Way. 463 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:27,240 'Tony, come in please.. 464 00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:28,760 l'll be there in ten, over. 465 00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:48,160 Neighbourhood watch. 466 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:49,920 ENGINE STARTS 467 00:28:49,959 --> 00:28:52,240 SIREN 468 00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:54,480 CAR SPEEDS AWAY 469 00:28:55,999 --> 00:28:57,240 Don't let Debbie see ya. 470 00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:59,400 She's talking about one bowl per family member per day. 471 00:28:59,439 --> 00:29:00,560 You bastard! 472 00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:03,440 - This an ambush? - l saw you with Mandy Maguire... 473 00:29:03,479 --> 00:29:05,600 - So what? - It's who you've been seeing, innit? 474 00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:07,840 - Seeing, yeah. - You're a fucking disgrace. 475 00:29:07,879 --> 00:29:09,520 What's it got to do with you? 476 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,600 You're supposed to be going out with Emily! 477 00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,560 The only reason l'm seeing Mandy 478 00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:16,160 is to see my kid. It's got nothing to do with Emily. 479 00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:17,720 Didn't see ya with a baby today. 480 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:20,520 Why did you lie if you're not shagging Mandy? 481 00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:23,480 Why are you keeping it secret if it's just what you said? 482 00:29:23,519 --> 00:29:25,440 Fuck om! 483 00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:32,480 Hiya. l've been waiting ages for you. 484 00:29:32,519 --> 00:29:35,400 Thought you could help me with me maths. 485 00:29:35,439 --> 00:29:36,920 l mean it! 486 00:29:40,959 --> 00:29:43,920 MOANING FROM UPSTAIRS 487 00:29:49,479 --> 00:29:51,160 TURNS UP TV 488 00:30:01,479 --> 00:30:04,960 Dear... Fuck! Erm... 489 00:30:04,999 --> 00:30:08,320 l really wanted to... No, no, no, no. 490 00:30:08,359 --> 00:30:09,960 l erm... 491 00:30:10,959 --> 00:30:13,960 Dear Em... 492 00:30:13,999 --> 00:30:14,920 ALARM 493 00:30:14,959 --> 00:30:16,600 Oh, God! Shit! 494 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:31,760 Gotta do the tag! Fuck's sake, let go will yer? 495 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:34,480 She's ringing the fucking ambulance! Fuck you do that for? 496 00:30:34,519 --> 00:30:38,400 He knew! l told him, Emily! No fucking strikes in this house! 497 00:30:38,439 --> 00:30:41,320 You touch another woman, that's it, you're out! 498 00:30:41,359 --> 00:30:42,600 Didn't have to fucking kill him! 499 00:30:42,640 --> 00:30:44,280 Oh, shit! 500 00:30:44,319 --> 00:30:45,800 He'd never look at another woman. 501 00:30:45,839 --> 00:30:48,240 Then why have we got crabs in the house? 502 00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:51,400 Someone's been shagging around, and it's not me. 503 00:30:51,439 --> 00:30:51,960 Yeah, but... 504 00:30:51,999 --> 00:30:53,080 lt's Lip. 505 00:30:55,839 --> 00:30:58,000 Lip's been shagging around. 506 00:31:02,039 --> 00:31:05,760 Fuck's sake... Sheila? 507 00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,120 What the fuck's this? 508 00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:10,280 - They've updated all their records. - You what? 509 00:31:10,319 --> 00:31:14,080 Mr Anastasiou was so helpful. He said he'd rectify wherever possible. 510 00:31:14,120 --> 00:31:16,360 - Rectify? - Everything! All your benefits. 511 00:31:16,399 --> 00:31:21,200 And...they're all backdated. Look! 512 00:31:25,959 --> 00:31:27,680 Fucking... 513 00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:31,520 Fucking massive! 514 00:31:32,600 --> 00:31:38,160 Top girl. Fuck me, pennies from fucking heaven! 515 00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:42,360 l've been on to the registry omice. 516 00:31:42,399 --> 00:31:46,080 They say we have to give them six weeks notice to post the banns, 517 00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:47,680 but we don't have to have the do there. 518 00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:51,440 That's all right. l was thinking the Gormley hotel. 519 00:31:51,479 --> 00:31:53,680 They always do such a lovely bumet. 520 00:31:54,879 --> 00:31:56,720 Hang on, rewind. 521 00:31:56,760 --> 00:32:01,880 l'm getting ahead of myself. Frank, Eddie's agreed to a divorce. 522 00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:07,760 Yeah, but... Last l heard, you didn't even have an address for him. 523 00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:11,920 Tony gave me a hand. The DVLC computer. 524 00:32:11,959 --> 00:32:14,160 Eddie's happy to sign any papers we want. 525 00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:18,840 So that's him, you're alive and then there's just Monica. 526 00:32:18,879 --> 00:32:22,160 Surely even Monica wouldn't get in the way of our happiness? 527 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,600 She's a complex character, Monica. 528 00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,000 She can't stand in our way, Frank! 529 00:32:27,039 --> 00:32:28,520 SHE CAN'T! 530 00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:30,240 Fucking hell, Sheila! Where's the... 531 00:32:30,280 --> 00:32:32,680 Oh, Frank... 532 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:34,240 Hang on, Jesus! 533 00:32:35,439 --> 00:32:39,280 Look... Look, l'll get on the bus and go over there now. 534 00:32:40,919 --> 00:32:45,320 Do it in person. You know, seize the nettle. 535 00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:50,400 Sheila, love, l'm onto it! 536 00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:55,960 Frank... Frank. 537 00:32:55,999 --> 00:32:57,560 Frank... 538 00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:01,920 All them years! 539 00:33:01,959 --> 00:33:05,760 What's a fucking piece of paper? You can't just... 540 00:33:08,600 --> 00:33:12,280 Marriage is a solemn state entered into by a man and a woman. 541 00:33:12,319 --> 00:33:15,880 State, yeah, yeah, for the fucking state. 542 00:33:15,919 --> 00:33:18,760 Cogs in the fucking wheel. 543 00:33:20,319 --> 00:33:22,520 Plus, the whole thing costs a fucking mint. 544 00:33:22,560 --> 00:33:25,880 Keeps it all going. It's an industry. 545 00:33:25,919 --> 00:33:28,920 Classic. ''l do.'' And ''You're fucked.'' 546 00:33:28,959 --> 00:33:31,680 And all the talking... 547 00:33:45,479 --> 00:33:47,960 What've you been saying to our Emily? 548 00:33:47,999 --> 00:33:50,840 Fuck all. l just said her boyfriend's a scally. 549 00:33:50,879 --> 00:33:52,880 He fucking is, isn't he? 550 00:33:52,919 --> 00:33:55,280 You haven't been using them towels on the landing? 551 00:33:55,319 --> 00:33:56,840 l had a shower. 552 00:33:56,879 --> 00:33:58,920 l put 'em out for a boil wash. They're crawling. 553 00:33:58,959 --> 00:34:01,280 You can tell your brother he's fucking dead. 554 00:34:01,319 --> 00:34:04,920 He can pay for the stum from the fucking chemist and all. 555 00:34:18,839 --> 00:34:20,800 l'm really sorry, Emily. It's just, 556 00:34:20,839 --> 00:34:24,120 Lip deserves a twatting. l tried telling him. 557 00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:27,480 You should be with someone who does stum for yer, gives you 558 00:34:27,519 --> 00:34:29,400 loads of presents and stum. 559 00:34:29,439 --> 00:34:32,720 You're gorgeous. And l know you understand stum, 560 00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:36,160 about people, cos you feel things, like what l do. 561 00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:39,520 There's all this stum l could talk to you about, stum in me head... 562 00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:41,040 Yeah, Carl, can you just fuck om? 563 00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:42,200 Who's he? > 564 00:34:42,240 --> 00:34:46,280 Push om, will yer? And tell Lip not to bother calling me again. 565 00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:49,880 Hiya. 566 00:35:23,240 --> 00:35:24,640 ALARM 567 00:35:32,319 --> 00:35:34,520 Your brother at home then, Carl? 568 00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:40,240 Troy! Troy! It weren't Lip, it were Emily! 569 00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:42,280 Troy! 570 00:35:42,319 --> 00:35:45,720 Fuck it! You can't! 571 00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:49,400 Stop! Troy, stop, it weren't him. 572 00:35:49,439 --> 00:35:51,560 lt was Emily with the crabs! She's a slag. 573 00:35:51,600 --> 00:35:54,080 She's been shagging another lad, with a car. 574 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:55,800 You calling my missus's Iass a slag? 575 00:35:55,839 --> 00:35:57,040 She's a fucking slag! 576 00:35:57,080 --> 00:35:58,280 No, stop it! 577 00:35:58,319 --> 00:36:00,480 What are you doing? Leave 'em alone!! 578 00:36:00,519 --> 00:36:02,120 Fuck om out of it, love. 579 00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,000 l said, ''Leave 'em alone.'' 580 00:36:04,039 --> 00:36:06,640 Fuck om, before you get hurt. It's none of your business! 581 00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:09,640 l'm warning you. If you don't fuck om, l'm calling me dad. 582 00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:11,880 Who's your dad, love? Patrick fucking Maguire? 583 00:36:11,919 --> 00:36:14,800 That's right. Mandy Maguire. 584 00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:20,280 Suppose if he's not around, one of me brothers might be free. 585 00:36:20,319 --> 00:36:22,120 No, no, you're all right. 586 00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:23,480 Sorry. 587 00:36:24,519 --> 00:36:26,000 Sorry, love. 588 00:36:33,999 --> 00:36:36,560 You never learn, do ya! 589 00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:40,640 l didn't do om! Somebody told him l was shagging around. 590 00:36:46,519 --> 00:36:49,200 - Fucking arsewipe! - l thought you were shagging Mandy! 591 00:36:49,240 --> 00:36:52,880 Even if l did, l can't believe you'd land me in the shit like that! 592 00:36:52,919 --> 00:36:56,240 - Makes a change from you doing it! - Hey, hey, come on. 593 00:36:56,280 --> 00:36:59,840 - He could've fucking killed me! - l thought you'd given everyone crabs! 594 00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,240 What? Lip gave Carl crabs? 595 00:37:09,720 --> 00:37:11,880 BABY CRIES 596 00:37:19,439 --> 00:37:23,200 You must have known. l was just beginning to worry about my tagine. 597 00:37:23,240 --> 00:37:27,360 They say you can't overcook a braise, but there are limits. 598 00:37:27,399 --> 00:37:30,440 l thought we'd have a little celebration. 599 00:37:43,959 --> 00:37:46,320 Tell me if l'm being over the top, 600 00:37:46,359 --> 00:37:48,800 but if you can't be over the top for a wedding... 601 00:37:48,839 --> 00:37:52,240 l've got my heart set on a croque en bouche, instead of a fruit cake. 602 00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:54,400 Look, spun sugar all over. 603 00:37:54,439 --> 00:37:57,520 Some people are intimidated by choux pastry, 604 00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,200 but actually it's quite straightfoM/ard. 605 00:38:03,439 --> 00:38:05,680 (Slurred) She wasn't in. 606 00:38:07,720 --> 00:38:10,440 Monica. 607 00:38:10,479 --> 00:38:13,600 They were both out as it happens. 608 00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:16,000 l see. 609 00:38:16,039 --> 00:38:19,080 lt's all right. Try again tomorrow, eh? 610 00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:23,240 We've got all the time in the world, haven't we? 611 00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:26,600 l know, Frank. 612 00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:32,520 l may be stupid, but l'm not blind. 613 00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:34,400 No, yeah, right... 614 00:38:34,439 --> 00:38:35,920 l do know. 615 00:38:38,999 --> 00:38:41,520 To tell you the truth, if l was you, l'm not 616 00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,280 sure l'd want to marry me either. 617 00:38:43,319 --> 00:38:47,400 l thought, just this once... You know what l'm like. 618 00:38:47,439 --> 00:38:49,040 Had it on my school report once. 619 00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:52,520 ''lf Sheila had her head in her books as much as she does in the clouds, 620 00:38:52,560 --> 00:38:54,880 ''she'd be top of the class.'' 621 00:38:57,839 --> 00:39:00,160 Never felt like daydreaming. 622 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:02,840 Just felt like l was waiting for something. 623 00:39:02,879 --> 00:39:05,520 l never knew what. 624 00:39:05,560 --> 00:39:10,160 Then you came along, and l knew just like that... 625 00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:13,400 Sorry. 626 00:39:16,439 --> 00:39:20,320 There's a raspberry pannacotta in the fridge if you've got room. 627 00:39:20,359 --> 00:39:23,160 lt's nicest if you bring it to room temperature. 628 00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:28,920 l'm a bit shattered. 629 00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:15,800 SOBBING 630 00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:40,880 'Yeah, hello 631 00:40:40,919 --> 00:40:43,080 Oh, hello Shre... Norma love. 632 00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:44,880 lt's Frank, Frank Gallagher. 633 00:40:44,919 --> 00:40:46,400 'What the fuck... What did you just call me?' 634 00:40:46,439 --> 00:40:47,400 Don't start! 635 00:40:47,439 --> 00:40:51,200 'What did you call me, you lanky streak of piss? What do you want?' 636 00:40:51,240 --> 00:40:52,960 Can l have a word with Monica? 637 00:40:52,999 --> 00:40:55,360 'Oh, for fuck's sake 638 00:40:55,399 --> 00:40:57,200 Here you go, fellas. 639 00:40:57,240 --> 00:41:00,680 No, put your money away. All drinks are on Frank Gallagher. 640 00:41:00,720 --> 00:41:02,960 lt's real diamonette, unique design. 641 00:41:02,999 --> 00:41:06,720 See how the stones catch the light, giving it an e_ra dimension? 642 00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:07,800 Did you get it om QVC? 643 00:41:07,839 --> 00:41:10,280 Yes! Frank said l could take my pick! 644 00:41:10,319 --> 00:41:11,320 lt's gorgeous. 645 00:41:11,359 --> 00:41:12,360 Look. 646 00:41:15,720 --> 00:41:18,360 Fuck me, look at him, will yer? 647 00:41:18,399 --> 00:41:23,400 Bit weird, innit? l mean, Mum and Dad getting a divorce? 648 00:41:23,439 --> 00:41:25,880 Compared to what? Crop circles? 649 00:41:25,919 --> 00:41:28,520 Dad living with Sheila? Mum and Norma? 650 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:32,400 Yeah, l know, but now they're never gonna get back together. 651 00:41:36,919 --> 00:41:39,480 Hey, did you happen to see 652 00:41:39,519 --> 00:41:45,240 The most beautiful girl in the world? 653 00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:52,520 And if you did, was she crying? 654 00:41:52,560 --> 00:41:54,640 Normal service has resumed. 655 00:41:54,680 --> 00:41:56,480 Fortunately. 656 00:41:56,519 --> 00:42:00,520 Mum shagged me Uncle Roy at me Auntie Cath's funeral. l reminded her. 657 00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:05,880 Well, it sort of put it in its place, me dad shagging Lillian. 658 00:42:05,919 --> 00:42:07,680 lt was like he was retaliating. 659 00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:14,560 We're pulling out. Had a call. Head omice has costed it out. 660 00:42:14,600 --> 00:42:17,440 We're paying you lot more than when we started. 661 00:42:17,479 --> 00:42:19,600 My number's on there. 662 00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:22,160 You can, you know, bring your friend. 663 00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:25,760 What are you expecting, a pillow fight? 664 00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:29,080 Don't do us any favours, you spineless little prick. 665 00:42:29,120 --> 00:42:32,960 We're dykes, not fucking wank fodder for pathetic little twats like you! 666 00:42:32,999 --> 00:42:34,680 Go home to your internet, eh? 667 00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:40,280 Oh, and by the way, my cock's twice the size of yours! 668 00:42:40,319 --> 00:42:41,680 You tell him. > 669 00:42:43,399 --> 00:42:46,320 CHEERING 670 00:42:54,439 --> 00:42:57,840 Kev. 671 00:42:57,879 --> 00:42:59,600 (Frank) Bonny kiddie. 672 00:42:59,640 --> 00:43:00,800 Takes after her dad. 673 00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:03,720 You know, Phillip... 674 00:43:03,760 --> 00:43:08,160 Phillip... It's a very special feeling. 675 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:10,120 Yeah, everyone says that. 676 00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:14,440 No, l don't mean the kiddie, that's bollocks. l mean it's a very special 677 00:43:14,479 --> 00:43:18,040 feeling you have for the mother of your children. 678 00:43:18,080 --> 00:43:21,880 l've only got one so far. Not quite in your league. 679 00:43:21,919 --> 00:43:23,840 Well, whatever happens, they can't... 680 00:43:23,879 --> 00:43:27,560 take that away from you, you know, them feelings. 681 00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:31,040 lt's like, you know, it's in your bones. 682 00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:36,840 lt's like when cancer spreads, and they give up on the fucking chemo. 683 00:43:36,879 --> 00:43:39,680 Oh, Frank, come and have a dance. 684 00:43:39,720 --> 00:43:40,960 Look at that. 685 00:43:40,999 --> 00:43:42,360 SLOW SONG PLAYS 686 00:43:42,399 --> 00:43:43,840 l love you so much. 687 00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:56,840 (Sheila) 'That night in the Jockey, l felt like the Queen. ''Sheila Gallagher''. 688 00:43:56,879 --> 00:44:01,440 'Just sounds right, doesn't it? Like it was meant to be# 689 00:44:04,720 --> 00:44:07,200 Hiya Kev. Long time no see. 690 00:44:07,240 --> 00:44:10,520 Roxy Ball? She's signed herself Ball! 691 00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:12,160 We are still married, Vee. 692 00:44:12,200 --> 00:44:14,280 You poisonous fucking bitch! 693 00:44:14,319 --> 00:44:15,880 Fucking hell! 694 00:44:17,039 --> 00:44:20,600 Does the sight of my penis really upset you that much? 695 00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:21,880 How long was she in prison? 696 00:44:21,919 --> 00:44:23,840 Oh, a few years. GBH. 697 00:44:23,879 --> 00:44:27,000 Come on then! l'll kill the fucking lot of yers! 698 00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:29,360 Starting with her! 699 00:44:29,410 --> 00:44:33,960 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 53283

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