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1
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'Now nobody's saying
the Chatsworth Estate is the garden of Eden
2
00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:08,628
'but it's been a good home to us -
me, Frank Gallagher,
3
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,717
'and me kids who I'm proud of,
4
00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:15,673
'cos every single one of them
reminds me a little of me.
5
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:19,030
'They can all think for themselves,
which they've me to thank for.'
6
00:00:19,080 --> 00:00:21,389
- Run! Run for it!
- Leg it!
7
00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:24,238
'Fiona, who's a massive help,
8
00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:29,274
'Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite,
which is why nobody calls him Philip now,
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00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:30,992
'Ian, a lot like his mam,
10
00:00:31,040 --> 00:00:33,998
'which is handy for the others
cos she's disappeared into thin air,
11
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:36,474
'and Carl - we daren't let him grow his hair
12
00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:40,069
'cos it stands on end and makes him
look like Toyah and nits love it.
13
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:43,749
'Debbie - sent by God. Total angel.
14
00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:47,918
'You've to check your change but she'll go
miles out of her way to do you a favour.
15
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:54,115
'Plus Liam - gonna be a star
once we've got the fits under control.
16
00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:59,917
'Sheila, me bird. Couldn't be happier...
One plate short of a full set, like.
17
00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:04,795
'Fantastic neighbours Kev and Veronica.
Lend you anything. Well, not anything.
18
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:08,674
'But all of them to a man know,
first and foremost,
19
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,678
'one of the most vital necessities in this life
20
00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:15,633
'is they know how to throw a party!
21
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:17,159
'Scatter!'
22
00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,713
Cunt!
23
00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:23,309
(Debbie) 'Psychologists believe
that those to whom evil is done,
24
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:25,316
'do evil in return.'
25
00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:26,315
Pig scum!
26
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In you go. Get in.
27
00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:30,558
No! Argh!
28
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No!
29
00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:35,275
(Debbie) 'I prefer an old Indian proverb -
30
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'those who bring happiness
into the lives of others
31
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'cannot keep it from themselves.'
32
00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:44,511
GlGGLlNG
33
00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:50,599
Looking at that won't
keep you out of prison.
34
00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:53,359
Get dressed, we've got work to do!
35
00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:59,279
You ready yet?
36
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,436
l'm coming!
37
00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:20,152
lf you've got morning breath,
you could've just said.
38
00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:23,757
You OK?
39
00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:26,109
l can't smoke, l can't drink,
40
00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:28,674
and every morning l'm hugging porcelain.
41
00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:31,632
How can they call this natural?
42
00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:34,194
Listen - if you want
to forget about this weekend...
43
00:02:34,240 --> 00:02:37,835
No chance! lf l'm going to be
puking my guts up,
44
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:40,553
l may as well do it somewhere beautiful.
45
00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:42,909
Oh, God!
SHE VOMlTS
46
00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:51,553
A romantic trip away - ooh, l'm envious!
47
00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:53,556
Well you can't come,
cos it's just me and her.
48
00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:55,318
Where's he taking you?
49
00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:57,954
Don't know, Carol. lt's a surprise!
50
00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:01,675
Last time a bloke took me away,
ended up in a power cut in Rhyl.
51
00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:06,157
lt could've been erotic.
Had he not insisted on calling me Cheryl!
52
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:12,359
All right, smart arse, give it back.
53
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:13,753
- What?
- The toast.
54
00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:18,669
- l dunno what you're talking about.
- Come on, Carl, got to leave in half an hour.
55
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:21,917
(lan) You looking for toast, Craig?
56
00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,033
Mm.
57
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:26,670
BO YS LAUGH
58
00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:30,433
lf anyone laughs, it's coming off.
59
00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,232
Marty, where's your tie?
60
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:34,874
l couldn't remember how many times
the fox went round the farmyard.
61
00:03:34,920 --> 00:03:39,038
Three, and then into its den.
62
00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:40,399
You look great, Marty.
63
00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:42,715
What job is the interview for?
64
00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:46,116
Traffic warden. Council are
equal opportunities employer.
65
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:50,312
Make a change!
Traffic warden calling the car drivers a cunt!
66
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:51,509
Bullshegg!
67
00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:53,676
What the fuck was that?
68
00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:55,392
Something we've been working on.
69
00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:58,716
To manage his Tourette's
for the court case,
70
00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:01,957
you replace rude words with...
71
00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,190
nicer ones!
72
00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:07,549
We're going to prove that
he's a reformed character.
73
00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:11,229
Don't knock it, l haven't
had a bucketbiff in days.
74
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:15,199
What you in court for, Marty?
Setting fire to things again?
75
00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:16,275
Shh!
76
00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:20,438
No, weren't even my fault!
That stupid bitch in the Post Office
77
00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:24,189
looking down her nose at me making
sarky comments...stupid soft kittens!
78
00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:25,958
She needed telling!
79
00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:28,468
Just a shame they had CCTV.
80
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:31,990
Ever speak to me like that again,
and l'll burn your house down,
81
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,555
you evil, ugly, patronising bitch!
GLASS SHATTERS
82
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:39,639
But once the courts see you're a respectable,
hard-working member of society,
83
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:42,148
they'll have no choice but acquittal.
84
00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:48,552
Time l went, eh?
85
00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:50,318
Bullshegg!
86
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,550
Hey, hey! Just let it roll.
87
00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:59,479
The more wound up you get,
the more they like it.
88
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:10,190
l'm looking for Kev Ball.
89
00:05:10,240 --> 00:05:11,832
You want next door, No 6.
90
00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:15,475
Trouble with these houses,
they all look the same.
91
00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:22,233
He's not still shacked up with
that gobby peroxide bitch, is he?
92
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:23,474
Veronica.
93
00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:26,557
That's her.
Mouth like the bleedin' Mersey.
94
00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:30,116
Who's that?
95
00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:31,991
Dunno.
96
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,430
Sooner you and me get some
time to ourselves, the better.
97
00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,198
Can't believe you're here.
98
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:50,199
Last l heard you were in Pathos
with Big Balls Benny.
99
00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:52,231
Ditched him soon as l got out there.
100
00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:56,239
Got myself a nice little bar job,
apartment on the beach,
101
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:58,271
and as much cock as l could handle.
102
00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:01,312
Sun, sex and sangria,
thought l were in heaven, Kev.
103
00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:02,634
So why are you back?
104
00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:05,069
Because, Blondie,
105
00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:09,671
l fell in love.
Bloke called Jack. Jack Russell.
106
00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:13,872
You know, like the dog.
As soon as l set eyes on him, l knew.
107
00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,115
l just knew.
108
00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,230
Got a light?
109
00:06:18,280 --> 00:06:20,271
What happened?
110
00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:23,311
lt's all gone wrong, Kev.
111
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:30,878
l'm sorry!
112
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:35,435
Hey, come here and tell your big brother.
113
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,554
He's a fucking junkie.
114
00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,989
Ah, Jesus!
115
00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:48,873
- Not heroin!
- Didn't he watch Grange Hill?
116
00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:52,310
l said, ''Jack, l love you -
117
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:55,158
''but either it goes or l do.''
118
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,073
Got any sugar for this?
119
00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:05,156
SlREN
120
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:11,000
No way, Kev, absolutely...
121
00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:13,031
SHOWER ON
122
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:15,913
..no way am l having her in my house!
123
00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:18,030
Veronica, she's me little sister!
124
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:22,392
l can't just chuck her out on
the street! Oi! Hang on a minute.
125
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:27,712
The amount of shit l've had
to put up with with your family,
126
00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:31,435
with your mother and her fellas,
and Marty and his bonfires.
127
00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:36,229
Fair's fair, right.
128
00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,556
You can't send her back to a junkie.
129
00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:43,949
Couple of days.
130
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:47,436
But if she calls me Blondie again,
l swear, l'll...
131
00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:01,314
(Marty) l'm a good human being
with a great deal to offer.
132
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:05,876
l am a good human being
with a great deal to offer.
133
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:09,879
l am a good human being
with a great deal to offer.
134
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:10,716
DOORBELL
135
00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:12,751
l am a...
136
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,430
l am a...
137
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:19,792
l am a good human being
with a great deal to offer.
138
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,831
Hiya, l was looking for Craig...
139
00:08:22,880 --> 00:08:25,678
Crackerjack! Sorry.
140
00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:29,633
l'm looking for Craig Garland.
This is the right house?
141
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,752
Yeah, well, sort of. But there's no one in.
142
00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:37,191
Right. Only, there's a bit of a
crisis at home, so if you see him...
143
00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,117
Yeah, definitely.
144
00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:40,354
Sue, by the way.
145
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,038
Marty.
146
00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:44,993
So, are you like, a mate?
147
00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:48,476
Mate? No, sorry. Hasn't he told you?
148
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,795
l'm his wife.
149
00:08:57,080 --> 00:08:58,911
l am a good human being...
150
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,519
l am a good...
151
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:03,596
Bullshit! Motherfucker!
152
00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:09,478
Flat out on her bed like Lady Muck
153
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:13,308
in the middle of the day
with my bathrobe on, cheeky cow!
154
00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:16,591
l swear to God, Fiona, l hate her.
155
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,074
l know she's Kev's sister,
but if l see her, l'm gonna...
156
00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:21,475
Marty!
157
00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:23,511
He should've been back hours ago.
158
00:09:23,560 --> 00:09:24,754
Why, where's he gone?
159
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,917
Job interview. We're trying to get
him on the straight and narrow.
160
00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:29,791
< Bloody hell, Debs!
161
00:09:29,840 --> 00:09:33,833
Know when you're beat! He's had
psychologists, psychotherapists,
162
00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:38,749
cognitive behavioural assessments,
and they all say he's off his lolly.
163
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:43,112
Why doesn't anyone give him a chance?
All he wants is to be accepted.
164
00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:45,196
To be treated like everybody else.
165
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,515
Help! >
166
00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,196
Marty, you're making a big mistake!
167
00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:51,878
You two-timing piece of shit!
168
00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:53,399
No!
169
00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:56,273
Not content with one
beautiful woman, no, you've got two!
170
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,151
Marty!
171
00:09:59,560 --> 00:10:02,757
Guess what Marty's discovered,
big secret, l'm married.
172
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,310
ls that it?
173
00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:07,713
What?
174
00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:08,795
Everyone knows that.
175
00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:10,034
Prick.
176
00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:13,277
No one told me! Wife appears,
l thought he were doing the dirty.
177
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,436
lt's over,
178
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:18,199
has been for ages.
179
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:19,468
So why you still living with her?
180
00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:23,718
Because she won't move out,
and it's my dad's fucking house.
181
00:10:23,760 --> 00:10:26,035
She's gorgeous.
182
00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:29,231
Marty, tell me you went to the interview.
183
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:38,236
DOOR SLAMS
184
00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:42,075
This was supposed to be a surprise.
185
00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:44,315
Get in. Start her up.
186
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:50,277
Bloody hell!
187
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:52,675
l didn't even think it had an engine!
188
00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:55,871
ls this leading where l think it is?
189
00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:59,799
Me and you, the open road.
Nowt more romantic than a camper van.
190
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:02,877
You've obviously never stayed
in a five-star hotel.
191
00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:05,639
lt's not exactly what l had in mind.
192
00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:08,478
You'll put up with anything
when the sex is fresh.
193
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:11,830
Blondie! No hot water!
How do you turn the immersion on?
194
00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:14,708
l will fucking kill her.
195
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:17,752
lf you'd rather stay in a B&B somewhere...
196
00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,075
No, no, it's great. Honest.
197
00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:23,317
Just think we might have to fumigate it first.
198
00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:25,954
Craig, your wife's at the front door.
199
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,399
Oh!
200
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:37,471
You living here now, then?
201
00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:38,714
Where l sleep's my business.
202
00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:40,239
You've not been home in over a week.
203
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,475
- Home?
- Well, you know.
204
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,637
Oh, my dad's house.
Place you want half of.
205
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,957
You actually wanting something
or is this a social visit?
206
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:55,753
Boiler's playing up. Place is like an icebox.
207
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:58,314
You know that book with the coloured pages?
208
00:11:58,360 --> 00:12:00,715
And how much is that going to cost?
209
00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,515
All right, l'll sort it.
210
00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:09,554
lt'll have to wait till after
the weekend. We're going on holiday.
211
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:13,194
Send me a postcard.
212
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:21,159
lf that boiler's bust,
l'm Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
213
00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:24,469
- Boo!
- Argh!
214
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:27,080
No, no, l'm sorry!
215
00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:30,908
lt's me, from earlier!
l didn't mean to scare you.
216
00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:35,192
lt's all right.
You took me by surprise, that's all.
217
00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:38,198
You manage to find him, your husband?
218
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:40,231
Sugar lumps!
219
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:44,430
Don't hide it for my benefit.
220
00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,675
Your Tourette's.
221
00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:50,679
Lad at our school had it,
everyone called him Fuck Off Phil.
222
00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:54,838
People only think it's weird
when they don't know what it is.
223
00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:57,959
l'd better get back.
224
00:12:59,840 --> 00:13:02,115
l think he's an idiot.
225
00:13:02,160 --> 00:13:06,312
He must be, to let someone
like you slip through his fingers.
226
00:13:09,160 --> 00:13:11,230
Marty, wasn't it?
227
00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:13,271
Horse sex!
228
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:19,351
l can't believe you're
bringing your own fire wood!
229
00:13:19,400 --> 00:13:21,709
Camping trip needs a camp fire.
230
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:26,151
When l was a kid, l used to set fire
to my sister's dolls when she annoyed me.
231
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:27,599
Hiya!
232
00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:32,034
You're taking the piss.
233
00:13:32,080 --> 00:13:35,834
Before you get your knickers in a twist,
l'm not here for you.
234
00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:37,632
They're going on a date.
235
00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:39,432
Who's going on a date?
236
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:41,072
Ta-da!
237
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:43,270
Look at this handsome devil!
238
00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:45,356
< You're like a young Bruce Willis.
239
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:48,312
Long time since l've been courted.
240
00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:51,557
Take my advice, Fiona.
Enjoy it while it lasts.
241
00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:55,159
Right, what's the game?
242
00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:59,193
Game? l'm going on a date.
Didn't know there were a law against it.
243
00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:02,516
Convenient - bagging a bloke
who lives in the same house.
244
00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:04,596
What difference does it make?
245
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:08,599
Anyone'd think you still had feelings for me.
246
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,154
Shall we? See ya, Debbie.
247
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,553
< See ya.
248
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:16,596
Don't wait up!
249
00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:20,792
Having a girlfriend's got to
be good for his court case.
250
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:28,396
l'm going chestnut brown.
251
00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:30,670
New life, new look, that's my motto.
252
00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,517
lt looks like a bleedin' protest.
253
00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:35,393
You ever thought of changing colour?
254
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:37,078
Bit '80s, that look, isn't it?
255
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:38,439
ls it?
256
00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:40,948
Sharon Stone, Madonna.
They were all at it then, but...
257
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:44,356
- l think your bloke's hanging about outside.
- You're joking.
258
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:46,277
Tall, skinny, a bit lggy Pop.
259
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:51,633
For God's sake, don't let him in!
lf he's not had a fix, he gets violent.
260
00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:56,037
Marie! l know you're in there, come on down!
261
00:14:56,080 --> 00:15:00,631
l've gotta be at work in ten minutes.
l'll shoot out the front.
262
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:02,159
l'm coming with ya.
263
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,952
You're not leaving me with him!
264
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,877
CLATTERlNG
265
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:09,115
lt's your shot.
266
00:15:09,160 --> 00:15:11,196
Which one am l going for?
267
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:15,074
Go for that red one into the
bottom corner. lt should go in, that.
268
00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:18,112
But if you lean over and get right on the cue,
269
00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:23,440
Get it just between your fingers there.
270
00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:26,233
lt'll go in there.
271
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,519
Oh, l think l've had too much wine!
272
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:32,552
Rubbish. More you drink,
better you get at this game. Shut it!
273
00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:37,477
MACHlNE'S WlNNlNG JlNGLE
Jackpot!
274
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,879
And it had a little wind chime.
275
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:45,638
Twisted freak.
276
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:49,559
How can sticking a needle
in your arm be normal?
277
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:52,239
Tell me, who sees that as normal?
278
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:53,508
l know, but...
279
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:56,438
love's blind, Frank.
280
00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:57,708
Look at Kev with Veronica.
281
00:15:57,760 --> 00:15:59,990
You're not telling me he couldn't do better.
282
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,838
A word from the wise. Get your stuff out,
283
00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:08,796
otherwise he'll have your stereo in his veins
before you can say, Dolby Surround Sound.
284
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,070
All right, Frank. We're dealing with it.
285
00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:12,155
Yes, but when?
286
00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:15,510
Druggie, Kev. We're talking desperation,
287
00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,516
we're talking scum of the earth.
288
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:21,633
No, thing is, l can't. l ain't got a van or anything.
289
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,148
Wait, no problem. Eamonn!
290
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,589
Eamonn! How do you fancy
291
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:29,871
being this lady's knight in shining armour?
292
00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:32,992
Depends. ls there a pint in it for me?
293
00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,271
Spunk face, bucket of spunk,
what else do you do?
294
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:37,799
Piss flaps.
295
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,593
Donkey dick... Donkey dick!
296
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:42,471
Come on.
297
00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:44,476
l want to show you something.
298
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:48,391
Bucket!
SHE LAUGHS
299
00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:53,273
You ready?
300
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:54,389
Yeah.
301
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:57,318
Three, two, one.
302
00:17:00,560 --> 00:17:02,994
What am l looking at?
303
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,713
The most beautiful place in the world.
304
00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:08,759
What, that?
305
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,631
To other people,
306
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:13,069
it's just a gas tower,
307
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:15,429
but to me, it's...awesome.
308
00:17:17,760 --> 00:17:20,194
Beauty's everywhere.
309
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,834
Just depends whether
you choose to see it.
310
00:17:28,360 --> 00:17:31,033
Boner! Sorry, sorry.
311
00:17:31,080 --> 00:17:32,911
Don't apologise.
312
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:35,030
That's what makes you who you are.
313
00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:48,918
Craig must be off his head.
314
00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,948
How can he live without that?
315
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,231
Let's go back to yours.
316
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:06,635
Er...what's all this?!
317
00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:08,989
A few home comforts.
318
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,759
Sneaked in while Jack were out.
319
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:14,030
Don't look at me, it were Frank's idea.
320
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,150
Figures, might've known
you'd stick your nose in!
321
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:19,590
Goodness of me heart!
Rescue mission, damsel in distress!
322
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:22,518
You'll stay for a smoke, won't you? Few drinks?
323
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:24,755
Top, yeah.
324
00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:27,837
Don't mind, do ya? Blondie?
325
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:31,996
Time's up, Kev.
326
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:37,155
For fuck's sake!
327
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:40,954
(Frank) Down from that castle, Rapunzel.
Let down your golden hair.
328
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:43,594
< GlGGLlNG
329
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,479
Ow!
330
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:47,555
Toss!
331
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:49,716
GlGGLlNG
332
00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:51,239
Oh!
333
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:58,279
GlGGLlNG
334
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,198
Suck me cock!
335
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:06,753
Sorry.
336
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:12,238
Craig, maybe you've got it wrong,
maybe she really likes him!
337
00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:15,636
l know he's got his problems,
but he's a good-looking bloke.
338
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:19,434
l've known her a lot longer than you,
and she's sticking the knife in.
339
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:20,913
By pulling Marty?
340
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:24,872
Kinky boots!
341
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:28,912
Just her presence in this house,
it's like poison.
342
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:31,793
Let her shag him!
Let her scream the house down!
343
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:33,432
Why should you care?
344
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:37,238
See?
345
00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:39,271
This is exactly what she wants.
346
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:51,917
l can't get me... Get your top off.
347
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:52,949
What?!
348
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:55,833
l can't do this.
349
00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:59,676
My head's all over the place.
350
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:01,915
We can wait. We don't have to rush it.
351
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,439
lt isn't that. lt's just...
352
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:11,555
l like you, and l've had a great time, but...
353
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:13,272
it's Craig.
354
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:15,788
What about him?
355
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,752
- He's still my husband, Marty.
- l thought it were all over.
356
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,598
We've been married eight years.
357
00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:26,998
lt's comfort more than passion,
but you can't just turn it off.
358
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:31,669
lt's all such a mess.
359
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:44,230
You still shagging him?
360
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:47,992
You mustn't tell Fiona.
361
00:20:48,040 --> 00:20:50,474
Promise me, you won't tell Fiona.
362
00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:00,071
Marty! No!
363
00:21:00,120 --> 00:21:01,997
Do you want her or not?
364
00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:05,316
- What the fuck are you talking about?
- Him! Fucking Casanova!
365
00:21:05,360 --> 00:21:07,555
Stringing you both along,
wanting it every which way!
366
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,556
- What have you told him?
- Nothing!
367
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:10,589
She told me the truth.
368
00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:11,550
What fucking truth?
369
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:13,591
About him and her.
370
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:17,758
He's still shagging her.
Even though he don't even want her.
371
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:18,835
You lying...
372
00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:22,190
Stay away from her,
l'll break both your fucking legs!
373
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:26,438
Fiona, he's messing you around,
he's messing everyone around.
374
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:31,315
lt's not fair, cos l could make her
happy, and he don't even love her.
375
00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:35,990
When did you last sleep with him?
376
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:36,836
Fiona!
377
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:40,714
We're having this out.
Tell me, when did you last sleep with him?
378
00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:45,151
- l'm not looking to hurt you.
- When did you last sleep with him?
379
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,668
Last week, last month, last year?
380
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:49,915
She's telling the truth!
381
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,997
Marty, open your eyes.
She's trying to break us up.
382
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:54,837
She's fucking using ya.
383
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,713
She's not. She wouldn't.
384
00:21:57,760 --> 00:21:59,034
We've kissed.
385
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:05,190
Do you think somebody like her
would be interested in a freak like you?
386
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:06,195
< Craig!
387
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:09,471
She is! Tell him!
Tell him how you feel about me!
388
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,032
Oh, shit! >
389
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:19,911
< Jesus, the baby!
390
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:23,520
- Baby?!
- l'll go and get an ambulance.
391
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,632
l knew it. You're going to leave me, aren't you?
392
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:31,197
lt's like bedlam out here!
393
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:32,355
Wait!
394
00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:33,799
What's all the racket?
395
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:36,149
lt's nothing. lt's OK.
396
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:39,476
Tell Craig forget about the ambulance.
397
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:41,954
Leave me alone!
398
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:43,479
Please, come back.
399
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,556
Marty, look.
400
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:50,068
SOBBlNG
401
00:22:58,120 --> 00:22:59,712
Prick!
402
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:15,431
Spunk face!
403
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,914
We've got a little world of our own
404
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,030
l'll tell you things that no-one else knows
405
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:43,594
l'll let you in when no-one else goes
406
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,473
We've got to do it without you
407
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:51,310
l'll tell you things that no-one else knows,
l'll let you in when no-one else goes
408
00:23:51,360 --> 00:23:53,430
We've got to do it without you...
409
00:23:58,040 --> 00:23:59,553
Oh, no.
410
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:15,869
- l'm only helping cos we wanna get rid of it.
- Fiona!
411
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,070
He's torn his mantra!
412
00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:21,270
He's in court on Monday!
413
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:25,154
l'm going on holiday,
what do you want me to do about it?
414
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:26,519
< What's up with your sulky chops?
415
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:27,788
l'm moving out.
416
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:30,991
l'm not stepping foot in that house
until my idiot husband gets rid of
417
00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:32,837
that STUPlD BlTCH!
418
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:35,599
The house is covered in tat.
419
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:38,154
Can l stay at yours, Fiona?
420
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:40,111
You can have my room till l get back.
421
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:41,309
Who's your mate?
422
00:24:41,360 --> 00:24:44,079
Alfred. He's the only bloke l can rely on.
423
00:24:44,120 --> 00:24:46,588
Ahh!
424
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:49,279
(All) Bye!
425
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:57,832
- For fuck's sake!
- Craig, don't!
426
00:24:57,880 --> 00:25:01,429
What is it with you, eh? Don't you
think you've caused enough damage?
427
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:04,358
Go home,
because l'm going on holiday with Fiona
428
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:06,436
and there's nothing you can say to alter that.
429
00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:08,198
Craig.
430
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:11,912
Your dad's dead.
431
00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:30,638
Ta.
432
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:35,674
Three years he's been in that home.
433
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:38,359
Hanging on and hanging on.
434
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:40,516
Trust him to pick this week to go.
435
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:44,913
My dad died the day l passed my driving test.
436
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:48,077
Still, meant l got his Citroen!
437
00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:55,918
Were you close?
438
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,030
Used to be.
439
00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,594
Best mates.
440
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:02,949
But then his head went west.
441
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:05,275
Dementia.
442
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:08,995
Last few months he started calling me Rupert.
443
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:15,119
lt's a terrible thing, losing your father.
444
00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:18,637
Grandad's still alive!
445
00:26:18,680 --> 00:26:24,357
l know, l'm just saying, it's a
terrible thing losing your father.
446
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,755
Marty's tablets.
447
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:28,677
For his hypermania.
448
00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:30,631
He needs to take two twice a day.
449
00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:33,956
Does no-one care?
450
00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:40,038
Still, there's an upside.
451
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:44,756
House is mine now, innit?
So once l flog that off, no more Sue.
452
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:58,755
l feel like l don't even know him.
l've got his baby inside me,
453
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:02,236
and it's like there's this whole other world -
454
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,271
wife, dad...
455
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:06,117
that l've never even been a part of.
456
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:08,151
Give it chance.
457
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,633
lt takes time.
458
00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:13,832
l know! That's the one thing we haven't got.
459
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:17,429
l just wish we'd had a bit more time
before all this had happened.
460
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:30,514
Cool.
461
00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:36,199
Sorry, Fiona, l've got to go to mine.
462
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:08,798
RUNNlNG WATER
463
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:19,908
- Show me your arms!
- You mad bitch!
464
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:22,394
Show me your arms, you druggie cow!
465
00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:24,476
Get off me! Get off me!
466
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:31,959
(Oh, yes.)
467
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:38,354
(Fiona) How did it go with the undertaker?
468
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:44,191
Sister's shafted me. She'd arranged
a burial when he wanted a cremation.
469
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:48,552
We stayed up one night, talking,
he told me exactly what he wanted -
470
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,670
a big party with people enjoying themselves,
471
00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:53,837
not me and my sister stood round the coffin
looking fuckin' mournful.
472
00:29:04,400 --> 00:29:05,799
Guess where they've come from.
473
00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:06,989
A diabetic.
474
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,678
Kelly Marie's bag.
475
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:11,553
They probably belong to dog boy -
Jack Russell.
476
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:15,878
l've just seen her scoring.
Tenner says that's why he kicked her out.
477
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:19,754
You can accuse our Kel of a lot
of things, but she's not a junkie!
478
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:22,314
She's wafer thin, always skint,
479
00:29:22,360 --> 00:29:24,669
and when was the last time
she wore a sleeveless top?
480
00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:28,269
l know you don't like her,
but that's my little sister
481
00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:31,073
and she's not into fuckin' skag!
482
00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:33,554
We'll see about that.
483
00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:37,115
Oi, what are you on about?
484
00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:38,912
She's going cold turkey.
485
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:51,633
Open the fucking door!
486
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:55,994
Stupid blonde bitch!
487
00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:00,953
Can you fuckin' hear me?
488
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:08,556
(Crowd chants) Jump! Jump! Jump!
489
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:22,117
CHlLDREN LAUGH
GUlTAR STRUMS
490
00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:24,435
Give us a beer, love.
491
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:26,755
D'you want a beer, Craig?
492
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:30,156
You can have a beer,
but you don't normally.
493
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,714
Yeah, like l can never have a drink!
494
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:39,840
We should get Carol playing the guitar! >
495
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:44,112
Quick, it's Marty! He's gonna
chuck himself off Sandringham House!
496
00:30:57,440 --> 00:30:58,919
Marty!
497
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:04,350
No, Debbie! Debbie, no!
498
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:06,152
l'm going up!
499
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:09,231
- Get off us!
- Let us past!
500
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:22,435
STAY BACK!
501
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:24,994
Marty, come away from the edge.
502
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:35,510
What's up?
503
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:37,994
l'm scared of heights.
504
00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:39,598
Let me do the talking.
505
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,631
GET BACK!
506
00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:47,719
Them people down there -
507
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:51,309
they'd love to see you try and fly.
508
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:54,989
You'd be the talk of the town
for about half an hour.
509
00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:57,190
Don't you think your life's
worth more than that?
510
00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:58,912
Cornflakes!
511
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:02,839
l just want to be like everybody else!
512
00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:07,032
Cos that fucker's right! l'm a freak!
513
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:09,435
Do you know how that feels? Do ya?
514
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:15,716
Yeah, look at ya. Yeah, come on!
515
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:17,796
Human misery.
516
00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:19,558
You can't get enough of it!
517
00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:21,716
Eh? Willing a bloke
518
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:23,716
to chuck himself to his death
519
00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:27,719
so that you can have a bit
of fuckin' entertainment.
520
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:32,914
Serves you right if he lands on
your heads, you brainless cunts.
521
00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:35,520
Yeah, jump, yeah, jump, come on!
522
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:38,433
Just...
523
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:40,471
stay away, Debs.
524
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,158
l mean it.
525
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:45,358
No.
526
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:50,110
Because if you're going, Marty,
l want you to know three things.
527
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:54,438
And you're not jumping off this
building until you've heard them.
528
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,476
We all love ya.
529
00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:58,999
Fuck!
530
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:04,594
You're not a freak. You've got Tourette's.
531
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:08,519
Craig is really upset that
he called you that. Aren't ya?
532
00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:15,758
You're the best thing
that's ever happened to Sue.
533
00:33:15,800 --> 00:33:18,519
She just doesn't know it yet.
534
00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:25,232
Debbie's right, Marty.
535
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:27,589
She just needs someone to love her.
536
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:32,994
She's an unhappy person,
but she weren't always like that.
537
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:34,758
She's got a good heart.
538
00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:38,878
She'd be lucky to have you.
539
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,388
l don't want to go back to prison.
540
00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:08,588
(Veronica) Nice one, Debbie!
541
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:10,551
Show's over.
542
00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:14,195
Yeah, go on, fuck off,
you bunch of freaks! Tossers!
543
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:33,079
He was a great bloke, Fiona.
544
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:35,076
He was always there for me.
545
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:38,119
Whatever.
546
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:50,637
lf l can do half as well with
our kid as he did with me, then...
547
00:34:52,760 --> 00:34:55,320
..l reckon l'll be all right.
548
00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:08,908
l'm a good human being
(with a great deal to offer.)
549
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:10,279
(l'm a good human being...)
550
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:11,355
KNOCK ON DOOR
551
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:12,958
Yeah?
552
00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:17,995
Big day tomorrow, Marty.
553
00:35:18,040 --> 00:35:22,192
Yeah, l'm just trying it on,
so l've got everything perfect.
554
00:35:22,240 --> 00:35:24,800
Make sure you get a good night's sleep.
555
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:26,956
You want to be fresh in court.
556
00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:37,157
l'm a good human being
557
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:39,794
with a great deal to offer.
558
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:41,319
l'm a good human being...
559
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:07,432
l'm sorry, l never meant to hurt you.
560
00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:12,075
TO Y SQUEAKS REPEATEDLY
561
00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:24,835
l don't know what l'm doing!
562
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:26,029
Sorry.
563
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:29,072
lt's all right.
564
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,511
Puppies.
565
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:48,191
TO Y SQUEAKS
566
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:57,957
Let me out, you fucking bastards!
567
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:00,389
Veronica, l need a shit.
568
00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:02,112
Go next door.
569
00:37:02,160 --> 00:37:05,357
You can't keep her in there forever,
she'll starve to death!
570
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:08,198
She can come out
when she admits what she is.
571
00:37:08,240 --> 00:37:10,231
A dirty addict!
572
00:37:12,280 --> 00:37:13,998
SHE SCREAMS
573
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:20,877
Oh, shut your fucking whining!
574
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:01,397
(Fucking hell.)
575
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:04,718
How are you feeling?
576
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,228
Go fuck yourself.
577
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:09,396
Tools of the trade.
578
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:11,954
Only one thing missing.
579
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:13,831
Not that you'll be wanting it.
580
00:38:15,720 --> 00:38:16,948
Kel!
581
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:20,639
Fuck's sake, Kel.
582
00:38:20,680 --> 00:38:22,875
Got to get you some help.
583
00:38:25,960 --> 00:38:27,632
A bag'd be a start.
584
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:52,989
(Kev) Careful with that, though, Kel.
585
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:56,157
We use that on the curries. lt's red hot.
586
00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:08,949
Take me home.
587
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:11,116
(Veronica) l'll call the doctor.
588
00:39:13,720 --> 00:39:15,711
SHE WHlNES
589
00:39:17,240 --> 00:39:21,756
l can't believe he's gone AWOL again.
What is the matter with him?
590
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:25,236
Don't look at me! They all blame the mothers.
591
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:30,638
l have done my best, Fiona.
God knows l have tried my best.
592
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:32,671
You'll see when you have your own.
593
00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:36,351
What's happening, where's Marty?
594
00:39:38,040 --> 00:39:40,679
Why would he do this to me?
595
00:39:40,720 --> 00:39:42,597
What if he sneaked out early?
596
00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:45,712
He might've needed some time
to himself, get his head clear.
597
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:49,514
lan's right, he might've
just gone to court by himself.
598
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:52,358
At least if we're there
we might be able to stall things.
599
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:54,550
There's no point sitting round here.
600
00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:58,115
Hang on, hadn't someone
better wait here just in case?
601
00:39:58,160 --> 00:39:59,149
l'll wait.
602
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:01,714
Don't you want to go to court
in case he shows up?
603
00:40:01,760 --> 00:40:03,512
l've tried my best.
604
00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:05,039
DOOR SLAMS
605
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:08,079
What are you doing here?
606
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:09,758
Come to pay my respects.
607
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:13,031
Yeah. Someone mentioned the free bar.
608
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:34,669
lt's freezing in here!
609
00:40:34,720 --> 00:40:37,154
Boiler's bust.
610
00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:40,112
Just have to keep each other warm, then.
611
00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:51,152
l wish we could stay here all day.
Cunnilingus!
612
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:54,239
We can.
613
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:56,157
Well, till the funeral, but...
614
00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:58,395
that gives us...
615
00:40:58,440 --> 00:40:59,919
four hours.
616
00:41:01,720 --> 00:41:03,711
SHE GlGGLES
617
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:19,270
lf he's not gonna show, we should go
to yours and get the ale flowing!
618
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:20,958
Frank!
619
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,958
Solicitor says he can't stall it any longer.
620
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:27,436
lf he's not here in two minutes,
they'll file it as a no-show.
621
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,630
They'll put him away.
622
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:34,435
All that bleedin' effort and
they're just gonna put him inside.
623
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:36,471
SHE SCREAMS
624
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:50,430
Oh, God, Marty.
625
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:55,996
Last time l've come like that,
it's been battery-operated.
626
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:07,070
What you doing tomorrow night?
627
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:10,232
'No!'
628
00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:11,679
Eh, come here.
629
00:42:11,720 --> 00:42:13,312
He's here!
630
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:16,272
Look at that, runs like a dream.
631
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:17,548
ALL CHEER
632
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:21,079
Sorry!
633
00:42:22,240 --> 00:42:24,470
Where've you been, spudhead?
634
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,192
Overslept, that's all.
635
00:42:26,240 --> 00:42:30,392
Court two. Your solicitor's name is
Tom Vickers, you've got 30 seconds.
636
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:31,634
Good luck.
637
00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:34,035
(All) Waaay!
638
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:38,878
Thanks, Debs.
639
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:41,070
l love a happy ending.
640
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:45,871
(Frank) Will this piece of shit
make it to yours, Craig?
641
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:48,358
Craig! >
642
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:09,389
l'd like to propose a toast.
643
00:43:11,640 --> 00:43:13,596
Here's to a good man.
644
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,359
He deserves kind words today.
645
00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:19,911
And eternal happiness.
646
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,070
To Marty's freedom!
647
00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:26,073
(All) To Marty's freedom!
648
00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:33,835
< Congratulations, Marty boy.
649
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:38,317
There you are, Marty, mate.
650
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:42,194
Look at her face. Serves her right
for stitching me dad up.
651
00:43:42,240 --> 00:43:46,358
He just wanted a cremation.
Promised to sprinkle him on the County pitch.
652
00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:47,753
Burial?
653
00:43:47,800 --> 00:43:50,155
He was fucking claustrophobic.
654
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:06,631
Ladies and gentlemen, >
655
00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:11,356
if you'd like to make your way out
to your waiting cars now, please.
656
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:21,111
Jesus fucking Christ!
657
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:31,514
Fucking hell!
658
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:33,437
Fuck!
659
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:50,158
(Fiona) Marty, what have you done?
660
00:45:04,680 --> 00:45:06,750
Craig!
661
00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:11,200
< What'd l tell you? Fucking spudhead!
662
00:45:11,240 --> 00:45:14,437
Everyone should go the way they wanna go.
663
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:22,110
HE LAUGHS
664
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:27,755
An hour out of court and you're pulling this?
665
00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:31,110
His dad wanted a cremation!
666
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,037
Get hold of that, our Trace!
667
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:37,958
We should have a drink, shouldn't we?
668
00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:40,753
l've just had that bastard MOT'd!
669
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:44,792
Holy camoly!
670
00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:48,435
(Debbie) 'Thousands of pounds
of cognitive therapy,
671
00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:52,268
'and all Marty really wanted
was someone he could love.
672
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:56,711
'Which, when you think about it,
is all anyone really wants.'
673
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:58,352
ALL CHEER
674
00:46:10,680 --> 00:46:12,636
Steve's back!
675
00:46:14,720 --> 00:46:18,599
Congratulations and jubilations
676
00:46:19,640 --> 00:46:24,156
l want the world to know
l'm happy as can be
677
00:46:24,240 --> 00:46:27,198
l want the world to know...
678
00:46:27,240 --> 00:46:30,232
Tell him to stay the fuck away
from me, you or any of us!
679
00:46:30,280 --> 00:46:33,909
l shot him! OK? lt was me, all right?
680
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:18,472
CUCKOO CALLS
681
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:23,155
SHEEP BLEATS
682
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:26,837
Morning.
683
00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:28,472
Morning.
684
00:47:29,240 --> 00:47:31,356
KNOCK AT DOOR
685
00:47:32,600 --> 00:47:34,909
Thought you might want a brew.
686
00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:42,274
HE TURNS OFF TAPE RECORDER
687
00:47:42,324 --> 00:47:46,874
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