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1
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'Now nobody's saying
the Chatsworth Estate is the garden of Eden
2
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'but it's been a good home to us -
me, Frank Gallagher,
3
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,717
'and me kids who I'm proud of,
4
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'cos every single one of them
reminds me a little of me.
5
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:19,030
'They can all think for themselves,
which they've me to thank for.'
6
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- Run! Run for it!
- Leg it!
7
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'Fiona, who's a massive help,
8
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'Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite,
which is why nobody calls him Philip now,
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'Ian, a lot like his mam,
10
00:00:31,040 --> 00:00:33,998
'which is handy for the others
cos she's disappeared into thin air,
11
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:36,474
'and Carl - we daren't let him grow his hair
12
00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:40,069
'cos it stands on end and makes him
look like Toyah and nits love it.
13
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:43,749
'Debbie - sent by God. Total angel.
14
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'You've to check your change but she'll go
miles out of her way to do you a favour.
15
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:54,115
'Plus Liam - gonna be a star
once we've got the fits under control.
16
00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:59,917
'Sheila, me bird. Couldn't be happier...
One plate short of a full set, like.
17
00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:04,795
'Fantastic neighbours Kev and Veronica.
Lend you anything. Well, not anything.
18
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:08,674
'But all of them to a man know,
first and foremost,
19
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,678
'one of the most vital necessities in this life
20
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'is they know how to throw a party!
21
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'Scatter!'
22
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Moon river
23
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(Both) Wider than a mile
24
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I'm crossing you in style
25
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Some day
26
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We're...
27
00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:35,751
(Fiona) 'It was Mum who said,
you don't get anything free in this world,
28
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'and I remember thinking, "Well, water's free,"
29
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'and then she left, leaving the final demand
for the water rates
30
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'and I discovered that even that had a price.'
31
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Moon rive-r-r-r
32
00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:59,868
A-a-a-a-nd me
33
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(Fiona) 'A big part of growing up in our house
was about trying to find something
34
00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:06,435
'for nothing.'
35
00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,994
You won't get benefits
if you walked out of a job.
36
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:10,712
So? l'll get another one.
37
00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:11,875
Just like that?
38
00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,480
- l've never struggled before.
- You've only ever had one.
39
00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:18,798
Don't care. l'm not being spoken
to like a child for anybody.
40
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:22,116
Couldn't you have said that to your
boss? Chucking it in's a bit rash.
41
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,149
Here you go.
42
00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:27,352
On me. Some things are worth standing up for.
My two went to that nursery.
43
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- l've been that far off twatting her myself.
- She's put herself out of work!
44
00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:34,871
lf less of us put up with that shit,
people like her might think twice.
45
00:02:34,920 --> 00:02:38,276
l wouldn't care, but she didn't
pay anywhere near minimum wage.
46
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l haven't and l don't intend to. >
47
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:48,072
Them lot. ''When did you last have an
accident?''
48
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:51,157
Makes you feel like you've missed out.
49
00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:53,111
What have l told you?!
50
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:56,994
- We can stand here if we want.
- We're only doing our job.
51
00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:59,759
Go do it somewhere else! Don't tell
me that Costshopper don't get a cut
52
00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:01,950
when you stand in their door.
53
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,036
You're hardly fucking Costshopper.
54
00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:06,230
This is your last warning.
55
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:08,032
Cheers, Yvonne.
56
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:11,591
THEY CHUCKLE
57
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:14,751
Oh, God.
58
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:17,712
God, talk to me. Talk.
59
00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:19,352
What is it?
60
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:22,039
lt's the third time l've seen him this week.
61
00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:24,071
We'll go the long way round.
62
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,680
You've had him, haven't you?
63
00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:29,280
You have. You've gone red. When?
64
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,279
He's dead fit, mind!
65
00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:37,231
Veronica!
66
00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:40,033
You have though, haven't you?
67
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,912
l'm carrying his baby.
68
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,315
l'm ten weeks overdue.
69
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,194
Now can we please keep walking?
70
00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:55,118
Jesus, Fiona!
71
00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:56,752
How do you know it's his?
72
00:03:56,800 --> 00:04:00,236
Because l do.
There hasn't been anyone else.
73
00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,872
And it isn't Steve's.
74
00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:05,551
Have you told him?
75
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,556
No. And l'm not going to.
76
00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,592
Here we go. Are you right in the head?
77
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:12,198
What's it gotta do with him?
78
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:13,958
About half.
79
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:15,956
He'll need to know what it'll cost him.
80
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,797
lt was an accident.
81
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,671
He doesn't need to know.
82
00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:23,431
l've booked the abortion.
83
00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:28,471
And?
84
00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:32,678
l don't know whether l'm
going to go through with it.
85
00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:33,709
l've not decided.
86
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:35,113
lt's cost you your job.
87
00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:38,550
No, it hasn't. That was me.
88
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,875
Yeah, you pregnant, tetchy, worried.
89
00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:51,715
l was the only girl in my class who
wasn't pregnant before her GCSEs.
90
00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:53,830
l've always been really proud of that.
91
00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,874
lf you're worried about what he'll say,
92
00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:01,195
l could come with you.
93
00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:04,912
No.
94
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,871
No, he doesn't need to know.
95
00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:17,999
Have you had an accident
in the last five years?
96
00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:19,996
I don't think so.
97
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:23,430
Are you sure? Do you know anyone who has?
98
00:05:23,480 --> 00:05:25,675
An accident? Boof!
99
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:29,714
Packet of skins, large ones.
100
00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:35,068
And a baby...
101
00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,554
Baby thing... Dummy!
102
00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:40,194
Kids are driving me crazy.
103
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:42,515
Hey, Yvonne. Had an accident
in the past five years?
104
00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:46,235
Right, that is it!
l've told them twice this morning.
105
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:51,234
Down there, by the front.
106
00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:52,076
Oi!
107
00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:57,355
Next time, it'll be my baseball bat!
108
00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,755
- For fuck's sake!
- We'll have you for that.
109
00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:02,155
Tell it to back of my head, loser!
110
00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:03,030
Oh!
111
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,072
You big poof, sit down here.
112
00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:07,712
l'm fucking soaked!
113
00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:09,432
And my forms are ruined.
114
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:11,038
Jesus, where's me tooth?
115
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:15,039
You'll be all right, Frank. You've split your lip.
You might have to go hospital.
116
00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:16,308
Where's my tooth?
117
00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:18,032
We'll take him to the hospital.
118
00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:21,038
l can't go, look at me!
119
00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:22,638
That's negligence.
120
00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:24,830
A classic claim.
121
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:28,429
- You could be a rich man here.
- Right you, out!
122
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,275
Hang on a minute.
123
00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:38,710
ls this what it's come to?
124
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,557
Charity tins?
125
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,919
Not for the first time.
126
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:45,236
What's the point in me and lan
working our arses off after school
127
00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:48,113
bringing in money,
if you can just chuck a job away?
128
00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,309
You tell me.
129
00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:50,713
So the kids don't starve.
130
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:51,988
This one's empty.
131
00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:53,871
lt can't be.
132
00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:56,673
- Have you seen the state of this?
- Yeah, l know.
133
00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:59,280
- But it's only till Fiona gets another job.
- Loser!
134
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:02,869
Rubbish. Because she starts
work for Terry Wilson next Monday.
135
00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:03,875
Are you serious?
136
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:08,152
He wants to see you first,
make sure you're not a minger, but yep.
137
00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:10,270
You are brilliant!
138
00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:11,992
Fiona, l take it back.
139
00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:13,598
You're not a lazy, dim bitch.
140
00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:16,074
Terry Wilson died during a bypass.
141
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:19,749
You say this every time his name comes up.
142
00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:24,032
Terry Wilson had a bad accident
on a bypass, not during one.
143
00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:28,596
And he didn't die, else he wouldn't be
offering her a driving job, would he?
144
00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:30,676
Driving? Can't drive.
145
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,472
You can, l've seen you.
146
00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:33,873
No licence.
147
00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:36,957
Well, tell 'em it's at the DVLA
and get a few lessons in quick.
148
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,877
Do you want beans on these, Carol?
149
00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:42,515
No, thank you. l'll get myself a fish without
batter.
150
00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:47,473
lt comes under public safety in a place of
business.
151
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,238
So many boxes l can tick here.
152
00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,316
Oh, Frank. You could have lost an eye.
153
00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:53,157
That would have been big money.
154
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:56,078
l waited five hours in fucking casualty
cos some guy
155
00:07:56,120 --> 00:07:59,157
who'd shot himself starts queue-jumping.
156
00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:00,908
But he died.
157
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:02,029
Oh, Frank!
158
00:08:02,080 --> 00:08:05,470
True, but shot himself.
159
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:07,078
Hello.
160
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:10,510
Nye Bevan would turn in his grave
if he thought twisted fucks like that
161
00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:13,552
were being prioritised over
your average working fella.
162
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:15,431
And they wonder where the money goes.
163
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,277
Director of Health Services.
164
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:19,231
Fucking chimps, the lot of them.
165
00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:21,555
Have you any head pains, Frank?
166
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:22,919
What?
167
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,394
Oh, yeah.
168
00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:29,353
Good. Blurred vision?
169
00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:32,437
Oh, yeah.
170
00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:35,278
l have actually. Since my 21 st.
171
00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:39,438
He's got the key to the door
Never see life as it was before
172
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:44,395
Too true. First drink was spiked with
a medley of LSD and Spanish Fly.
173
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,193
Got arrested for shagging the
exhaust pipe of a Mini Metro.
174
00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:49,515
DV. Textbook.
175
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:52,674
Double vision.
176
00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:54,915
Did you hear that, Sheila? l'm textbook.
177
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,076
l'm not surprised.
178
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,792
And that tooth wants capping pronto.
179
00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:01,149
l'll get you in private.
180
00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:02,792
Private? Thanks, love.
181
00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:05,229
- lt's all on the claim.
- We have a referral scheme.
182
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:09,717
Remember, Frank. No win, no fee.
183
00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:11,716
And we will win.
184
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:15,719
Just need your autograph here
and we'll make you a rich man, Frank.
185
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,513
You obviously like him.
186
00:09:23,560 --> 00:09:25,710
- l don't!
- You big liar!
187
00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:29,833
How many times have you said that men
don't face up to their responsibilities?
188
00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:30,869
Never.
189
00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:32,911
Well l have.
190
00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:36,748
And if you don't tell him,
he'll find out from the CSA down the line.
191
00:09:36,800 --> 00:09:38,199
lf you decide to keep it.
192
00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:39,673
l don't need the CSA.
193
00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:41,950
Oh, hello! Single unemployed mum,
194
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,753
which you will be once you start to show.
195
00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:47,678
- Tits are already bigger.
- Are they?
196
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:52,430
Eh, nowhere near mine,
so keep your beady eyes off!
197
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,597
Look, just go around and tell him
and tell him quick.
198
00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:58,871
Trust your Auntie V.
199
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,031
Hiya. ls Frank in?
200
00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:08,594
We need to talk to him about this letter.
201
00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:10,278
Are you police officers?
202
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,038
We're from the shop on the parade, Sheila.
203
00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:14,196
Oh, yeah.
204
00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:17,869
Sorry! Didn't recognise you
without the strip lighting. Come in.
205
00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:19,069
Come in.
206
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:27,559
(Kash) lt was an accident, Frank.
207
00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,909
We can't afford six grand.
208
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:33,999
- We'd have to close the shop.
- We don't want that, do we, Frank?
209
00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:35,155
They won't close!
210
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,030
Kash.
211
00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:39,231
Hang on. Frank, be reasonable.
212
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:41,748
l only want what's right, Kash.
213
00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:46,237
What's happened to trading standards?
Mary Whitehouse?
214
00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:48,475
lt's all in the hands of my lawyers.
215
00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:51,353
Don't do this. l've built that shop from scratch.
216
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:53,311
Whiplash, new tooth.
217
00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:57,035
- You know what that costs!
- You wanker, Frank Gallagher.
218
00:10:57,080 --> 00:11:00,152
Don't ever show your
pathetic face in my shop again!
219
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,875
True colours now, is it? Setting the dogs on.
220
00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:07,276
- Very fucking red dot.
- You wanna try earning a living like us.
221
00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:11,757
- Thought you were closing down!
- lt's your son you're hurting. Come on, Kash.
222
00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:13,916
We're wasting our time.
223
00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:18,033
Thanks for coming.
224
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,398
Yvonne, have we got any more pegs in the
back?
225
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:30,389
l don't know and l don't care!
We're closing up. Come on you lot, out!
226
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:31,395
What's happened?
227
00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:34,830
Your dad. Frank Gallagher!
That's what's happened.
228
00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:37,235
l'm closing up. You're out of a job.
229
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,633
l'm waiting to be served, here.
230
00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:40,238
Whatever it is, have it!
231
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:43,352
l will not be blackmailed by people round here.
232
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:46,073
lf they wanna treat us like this,
they don't deserve a shop.
233
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:49,635
l forgot. l wanted two tins of salmon.
Can l take them as well?
234
00:11:49,680 --> 00:11:50,669
Don't push it!
235
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:53,792
lan, l'm sorry, but you're gonna have to go
home.
236
00:11:53,840 --> 00:11:56,559
Kash, do the shutters!
237
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:02,514
Can everyone leave now, please!
This shop is no longer open for business.
238
00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:04,118
You don't have to do this.
239
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:05,957
Kash, this is my shop.
240
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:10,198
lan, l'm sorry, but l've no choice here.
241
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:27,795
ls Craig in?
242
00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:29,068
Yeah, come in.
243
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:31,076
Craig, visitor.
244
00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:34,032
Hello, stranger. Long time, no see.
245
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,308
l just came to have a word.
246
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:37,749
Right. This is Sue.
247
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,279
- Hiya.
- Me wife.
248
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:42,359
Oh, right.
249
00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:45,314
- Hi.
- This is Fiona.
250
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:47,920
- Don't worry, it doesn't change anything.
- We're not together.
251
00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:51,077
We haven't touched in two and a half years.
Can't get shot of her!
252
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:53,918
That's because the tight-arsed gimp
won't give me what he owes me.
253
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:55,279
There's two sides to that.
254
00:12:55,320 --> 00:12:57,788
Don't touch the pasta in the fridge,
l'm having it later.
255
00:12:57,840 --> 00:13:00,957
Technically, this is all half mine.
Otherwise l'd be long gone.
256
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:04,072
Yours as in it was your dad
who worked all his life to pay for it?
257
00:13:04,120 --> 00:13:05,997
No, mine as in rightful settlement.
258
00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:08,076
Watch him.
259
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,348
Welcome to my world.
260
00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:19,078
Fiona!
261
00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,551
A flat three grand for this.
262
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,511
Or so my lawyer tells me.
263
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:33,836
Well, your face is your fortune, innit, Frank?
264
00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:36,440
Hey, Jez. Could we say l work here?
265
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,789
Bring in a sick note. Loss of earnings.
266
00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:42,992
lf l said you worked here, Frank,
health and safety would shut me down.
267
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,270
Oh, come on. The money l spend in here.
268
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:49,552
D'you wanna see your bar tab? Claim for that
and tell them you were driven to drink!
269
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,113
You bastard!
270
00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:53,469
You stupid fucking bastard!
271
00:13:53,520 --> 00:13:56,318
- Jesus, what the fuck was that for?
- Out!
272
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,271
Shop's had to close cos of him!
273
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:00,311
They can't afford to keep it open.
274
00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:04,239
l'm out of a job, Kash is out of a job,
your family's on the breadline,
275
00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:05,474
and you don't give a fuck!
276
00:14:05,520 --> 00:14:08,478
- What are you talking about?
- ls it shut?
277
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:11,910
Ask him! He's suing the shop
and they've had to close.
278
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:15,032
Where are we gonna shop
with that place gone?
279
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:17,674
lt's a half-mile walk to the precinct.
280
00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:22,111
Something's up. Yvonne were kicking off
terrible and she chucked me out.
281
00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:23,832
So is it fucking shut?!
282
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:26,075
Yes. She were cursing him.
283
00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:28,315
Right you, we're not serving you.
284
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:29,634
You can't bar me!
285
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:32,990
We're not barring you, Frank.
We're just not choosing to serve you.
286
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,156
Due to popular demand.
287
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,475
Do we wanna serve someone
who's closing our amenities?
288
00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:39,875
- (All) No!
- See.
289
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:51,356
l don't believe this. l'm really sorry, lan.
290
00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:53,231
l'm not finding him a job as well.
291
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:56,272
Yours better work out,
or we're up shit creek without a paddle.
292
00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:05,871
You all right?
293
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:07,672
l can't keep it now.
294
00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:10,029
l really need this job, V.
295
00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:12,594
You'll be all right.
Have you been round to lover boy's?
296
00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:14,756
- Yeah.
- And?
297
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:15,949
l met his wife.
298
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:17,274
He's married! Jesus!
299
00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:20,357
- Who's married?
- Nothing. No-one.
300
00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:23,118
You're gonna have to tell 'em.
301
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:28,315
l'm pregnant.
302
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,749
l knew it. l knew you were.
303
00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:33,268
You did not. Everyone says that.
304
00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:37,359
l did. l've been knitting bootees for a week.
They're in my room.
305
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:39,311
How did you get pregnant?
306
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:42,557
- Don't be thick. Shit, Fiona.
- Whose is it?
307
00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:44,795
You don't know him.
308
00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:46,671
Congratulations.
309
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,915
Another mouth to feed.
310
00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:50,359
Thank you.
311
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,197
l'm going to bed.
312
00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:55,239
Up the duff!
313
00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:59,798
l know how you get pregnant.
314
00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:10,229
KNOCK ON DOOR >
315
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,433
One more won't make much difference.
316
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,353
Prick!
317
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,870
Slaphead! For fuck's sake!
318
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,876
Come on, Fiona.
Don't wanna be late on your first day.
319
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:02,148
What you on about?
320
00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:05,439
You can't drive on your own.
321
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:06,879
Not on your provisional.
322
00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:08,399
l can drive.
323
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:10,829
No-one's gonna know.
l'll easily get away with it.
324
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:11,949
What if you get stopped?
325
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,434
You'll be out of another job. Not clever.
326
00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,516
Someone's gotta sit with you, then it's legal.
327
00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:18,232
When was this decided?
328
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:19,713
(All) Last night.
329
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:22,399
Marty was the only one we
knew with a clean licence.
330
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:26,069
He's been inside too
long to run up any points.
331
00:17:26,120 --> 00:17:27,951
Oh, God help me!
332
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:28,955
See ya.
333
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:32,117
(Debbie) Have a nice time. Bye.
334
00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:53,716
l've come for the money you owe me.
335
00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:56,433
Can help with the stocktake
if you wanna earn a bit more.
336
00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:00,437
Are you really gonna close?
337
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:04,268
Got chance of a unit. Croft Estate, Valesworth.
338
00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:05,639
That's miles away!
339
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:09,673
l can apply for a start-up grant.
They're giving them away up there.
340
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:11,597
More money than there is round here.
341
00:18:11,640 --> 00:18:13,835
Could be best thing that ever happened.
342
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,550
Oh, don't start.
343
00:18:18,600 --> 00:18:21,034
What choice have we got?
344
00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:22,069
lt's either this,
345
00:18:22,120 --> 00:18:25,590
or we watch his dad piss away
our hard-earned money in t'Jockey.
346
00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:26,914
They've barred him.
347
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:29,030
Why, what's he done now?
348
00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:31,719
Shut this shop. They hate him.
349
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:34,672
lt's nice to know there's some justice in t'world.
350
00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:38,559
l'll leave you two.
351
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:43,431
l was gonna come and see you.
352
00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:45,391
lt's not fair.
353
00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:47,158
We'll still see each other.
354
00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:50,237
When, Kash? And where?
355
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,316
The back of your van?
356
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:54,989
Come here.
357
00:18:58,080 --> 00:18:59,672
lAN SOBS
358
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,517
Where's your dad drinking then, lan?
359
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:12,633
Nowhere. They've all barred him.
360
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:14,432
Well, you'd better be right.
361
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:18,996
- Cos l'll have your balls if this plan don't work.
- What plan?
362
00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:49,592
- What are you doing, Marty?
- lt's my mirror.
363
00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,916
lf l'm responsible for the vehicle,
l've got to have one of these.
364
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:54,313
Where'd you get it?
365
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:55,873
l found it.
366
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:58,593
There's a motorcycle overtaking now.
367
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:00,312
All right, l can see it.
368
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:03,557
Who the fuck nicks a driving mirror?!
369
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:08,593
Here, make yourself useful.
370
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:11,598
Look up that address in this.
371
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,676
< Headlamps!
372
00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:16,598
lf you offset the loss of business against the
claim,
373
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:18,596
it's eight days before we're out of pocket.
374
00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,393
But l'm holding out for no more than two, lan.
375
00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:22,668
There's 200.
376
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:29,034
Right, get these to everyone who has
a paper and any other doors you pass.
377
00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,196
Your dad is gonna be begging us to open.
378
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,071
Sorry love, we're closed.
379
00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:36,078
Legal reasons. Frank Gallagher's fault.
380
00:20:36,120 --> 00:20:38,873
That's Frank Gallagher.
381
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:40,433
Off you go, you two.
382
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:19,919
Pint, please.
383
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:21,996
A pint of what, Sheila?
384
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,871
Just a pint.
385
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:34,152
l'm not serving you, Frank.
More than my job's worth.
386
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:37,272
Christ's sake, give me the fucking Oscar.
387
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:39,356
Come on, a quick one. Jess will never know.
388
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:40,628
No, but they will.
389
00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:47,391
- They've lost the shop, Frank. They're angry.
- Give over, they can shop anywhere.
390
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:49,670
Shops? lt's not fucking Warsaw!
391
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:51,039
(Man) lt's as good as. >
392
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:01,271
Come on, Frank, everybody's looking.
393
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:05,068
Give us an E to take away.
394
00:22:08,360 --> 00:22:10,510
Keep it to yourself.
395
00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:14,749
Just a pint!
396
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:18,076
Sorry, Frank. He caught me off guard.
397
00:22:18,120 --> 00:22:20,714
l kept thinking whisky,
but l knew that wasn't right.
398
00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:22,239
All you had to fucking do...
399
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,555
Ah! Blood!
400
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:27,068
- l've been shot!
- Fucking hell!
401
00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:29,873
Oh, my God, Frank!
402
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:34,479
lt's a fucking egg!
403
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:40,798
LOUD SCREAMlNG
404
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,518
(Man) You're a dead man, Gallagher! >
405
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:46,152
Fuck off!
406
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:51,951
Here you go, five sugars.
407
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,359
Fiona!
408
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:05,112
Fiona... Not a chance.
409
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:06,479
D'you want the baby?
410
00:23:08,280 --> 00:23:10,555
l don't want to talk about it, Marty.
411
00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:14,559
Because it... lf you want to keep it,
you don't have to bring it up alone,
412
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,352
if you don't want. Shitting!
413
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,672
Thanks.
414
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,199
l'd do anything for you.
415
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,634
Look, Marty.
416
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,148
Thing is, l'm not gonna have it.
417
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:35,070
l need to keep this job,
or we've got no money coming in.
418
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:37,475
lt wouldn't be a good idea right now.
419
00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:41,236
l'm booked in for the morning.
420
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,316
But thanks.
421
00:23:43,360 --> 00:23:45,191
Right.
422
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:49,191
l suppose that's for the best, though.
423
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:52,719
ls it?
424
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:57,111
You don't have to do this, you know.
425
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,720
Sitting with me.
426
00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:01,955
lt's very kind, l'm really grateful.
427
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,470
lt's fine, l like it... Wanker!
428
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:06,999
Not you.
429
00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:16,876
l am dropping the charges,
you can have the shop back!
430
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,480
CHEERlNG
431
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:22,435
Now pour us a pint.
432
00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:25,790
Let's see you do it first.
433
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,431
Remind me to pick up some free condoms
while l'm here.
434
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:03,672
You seen the state of her?
How did she get a bun in the oven?
435
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:15,759
Fiona Gallagher?
436
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:22,753
- Shall l come with?
- No, l'll be fine.
437
00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:24,279
See you in a bit.
438
00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:41,030
lt's what this country's all about, innit?
l mean, they're hard workers
439
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:44,709
and they represent the values of our way of life.
440
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:47,194
Late night opening,
441
00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:48,719
fair prices,
442
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:52,116
and...affordability.
443
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,958
l'm proud to announce, back open.
444
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:59,068
Right, going home, got a headache.
445
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:06,994
Before you say anything,
we've had to make one or two price rises.
446
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:08,758
lt's because of the loss of business.
447
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:12,395
But if you offset that against your bus fares
you've been paying, you're still saving.
448
00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:17,039
A total victory!
449
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,594
Yeah, well get out there
and make yourself worthwhile!
450
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,269
Stick the kettle on, Sheila.
451
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,154
Oh, sweet Jesus, what do you two want?
452
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:39,919
Tell me you haven't gone
and cancelled your claim, Frank.
453
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,872
Look... l don't want to talk about it.
454
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:44,319
You can't pull out now.
455
00:26:44,360 --> 00:26:47,158
Wheels in motion, Frank.
They've explained it to me.
456
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:50,112
Look. We spent best part of a day with you,
Frank.
457
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:53,789
Oh, Christ, l can't do right for
doing fucking wrong round here.
458
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:59,790
You know, l have had...eggs and
stuff, so no more. Finito.
459
00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:04,516
Frank, l don't think you quite understand.
This is your bill. Read the small print.
460
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:10,271
lf you terminate the claim prior to completion,
any costs incurred by the company
461
00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:13,278
- are passed onto the client - you, Frank.
- You what?
462
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,629
- lt is in there, you signed it.
- What fucking costs?
463
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,309
Letters, dental work, admin costs.
464
00:27:19,360 --> 00:27:21,635
£926.47 p.
465
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:26,997
Oh, my God, Frank. What have you done?
466
00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,156
BABY CRlES
467
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,190
How are you?
468
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:55,798
Fine.
469
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,035
So don't all stare at me.
470
00:27:58,080 --> 00:27:59,957
We wondered where you were.
471
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:04,390
What? Carl, what?
472
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:05,589
What's the matter?
473
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:08,198
All right?
474
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:10,319
Fuck you doing here?
475
00:28:10,360 --> 00:28:11,759
Wanted a word.
476
00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:16,078
- l told him to come back later, but he wouldn't.
- That's fine.
477
00:28:16,120 --> 00:28:20,113
- Look, if it's a bad time...
- No, no. You might as well stay.
478
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:23,311
- ls everything all right?
- (Fiona) Yeah.
479
00:28:23,360 --> 00:28:24,873
And?
480
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:28,551
l'd better explain.
481
00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:30,750
Right, l'd better be off. Washing up to do.
482
00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,473
Probably. You know where l am if you need me.
483
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:39,268
l went for an abortion today.
484
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:43,876
Right. Sorry.
485
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,275
But l didn't have it.
486
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,709
l couldn't.
487
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:54,039
l feel...different, in a good way.
488
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:55,718
l just couldn't do it.
489
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,513
So l'm keeping it. So don't start.
490
00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:04,556
Look, this is a bad time...
491
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:07,273
lt's yours, by the way.
492
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,558
l've been trying to tell you.
493
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:15,434
l thought if l knew you a bit better,
it might make more sense.
494
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:19,678
But then everything seemed to go wrong. Sorry.
495
00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:21,438
lt's OK, though.
496
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:23,471
l've sorted it all out.
497
00:29:23,520 --> 00:29:24,839
You should have told me.
498
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:27,678
l might have if your wife
hadn't answered the door.
499
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:31,474
l didn't know you were going to turn up.
l wasn't hiding it.
500
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:33,272
lt doesn't matter.
501
00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:35,754
You were right, it's nothing to do with me.
502
00:29:35,800 --> 00:29:39,076
What, and you thought once you'd told me,
you'd never see me again?
503
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,918
- lt's what most blokes round here do!
- Bollocks!
504
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,474
Most of them get married
and really fuck things up.
505
00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:47,034
You haven't got that option. Nor do l.
506
00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:50,196
l'm not asking for anything.
507
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,629
lt doesn't involve you.
508
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:55,399
Do l not have that option either?
509
00:29:57,720 --> 00:29:59,233
l don't know.
510
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,510
So how long have you been married?
511
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:06,552
Years. Well, feels like years.
512
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:08,431
Can't get shot of her.
513
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:11,392
lt's my dad's house,
but she's claiming it's half hers.
514
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:15,035
l wouldn't care, but he's still alive, just.
515
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:19,710
l was working on the oil rigs when we
first met. l think that suited her.
516
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:21,591
l'd go away and she'd go shopping.
517
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:24,433
D'you wanna know the irony?
518
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:27,472
l've wanted a little girl for years,
just not with you.
519
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:28,316
Oh!
520
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:33,309
l don't mean with somebody like you,
just somebody l'd planned it with.
521
00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:35,078
So were you trying?
522
00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:37,076
l thought we were.
523
00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:41,830
Turned out she was using enough
contraceptives to sterilise an elephant.
524
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:45,797
Why do you say a little girl?
525
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:50,039
l had a sister that got hit by a car.
526
00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:52,274
ls that true?
527
00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:54,276
Yeah, course it is.
528
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:55,799
Who'd make that up?
529
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:13,873
All right, Paddy.
530
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:16,229
Hey, Paddy!
531
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:19,477
Didn't you win the...wotsit, lottery,
a few weeks back?
532
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:21,397
No, Frank, it was my brother Martin.
533
00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:23,271
Right, but...
534
00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:26,551
Could you ask him to lend me
a few hundred quid, just for a week.
535
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:29,273
- l can ask him, Frank, but he won't do it.
- Oh, come on!
536
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:35,156
He won £75, Frank, and he's still has got that
fine to pay cos of you. Good night.
537
00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:39,669
Fucking...
538
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:44,628
MUTTERS TO HlMSELF
539
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:56,519
Oh, well l phoned as soon
as the lines were open,
540
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:59,199
so l don't see how l could be too late.
541
00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:02,310
OK, fingers crossed for next time.
542
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:03,839
Bye.
543
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:07,114
Some people are so snooty.
BANGlNG >
544
00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:12,312
Come in! Oh, that's perfect. Here you are, Carl.
545
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:14,351
Congratulations on the baby, by the way.
546
00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:18,598
What does that make me?
A half granny or a step granny?
547
00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:22,030
Either way, it is a bit of a mouthful.
Your dad was so moved.
548
00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:27,155
Holiday to Florida, £500 spending money,
GMR, 1 5 minutes.
549
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:29,998
We'll just take the spending money. Can't fly.
550
00:32:30,040 --> 00:32:31,314
What's going on?
551
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:34,397
Phone-ins. l'm going to get us the money back.
552
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:37,989
Your dad's inconsolable. He tried to sell
his cap back to the dentist this morning.
553
00:32:38,040 --> 00:32:39,632
You're gonna win it?
554
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:41,636
l have done them before.
555
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:43,318
When Karen was little.
556
00:32:43,360 --> 00:32:45,396
Year's supply of mini yogurts.
557
00:32:45,440 --> 00:32:47,317
The secret's in the tie-breakers.
558
00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:49,157
l'm a natural.
559
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,112
l've done two quizzes on the radio already.
Ha, ha, ha!
560
00:32:52,160 --> 00:32:54,799
- Bit of a long shot, isn't it?
- Someone's got to win.
561
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:57,434
Do you want to play beat the intro, Sheila?
562
00:32:57,480 --> 00:33:01,155
(Deep breaths) Whatever! Ha-ha-ha!
563
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:02,474
l need to get off.
564
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,078
Good luck.
565
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:08,033
Yeah. Your dad is so proud of you.
566
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:10,958
lt never rains, but it fucking pours.
567
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:14,310
You try and bring your kids up with
some self-respect, and then what?
568
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:16,874
Your daughter, the apple of your eye
569
00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:21,550
is up the duff by some Tom, Dick and Harry.
Where do we go wrong?
570
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,637
- Have you tried leading by example?
- What about Liam?
571
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:26,830
- He's yours, Frank.
- l know that,
572
00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:29,110
but she can't just walk out and leave him.
573
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:30,593
'Are you there, Sheila?'
574
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:33,108
l'm on the air, call Karen. Call Karen.
575
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:35,071
Yes, hello, l'm still here, Dickie.
576
00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:40,118
Fucking hell, not you two again.
577
00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:43,436
Sheila! Look, it's Sheila on Grab My Grand!
578
00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,278
'l know that one. ls it Puffin lsland?'
579
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:49,676
'Correct. What is the capital of Spain?'
580
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,679
Barcelona! l went at Easter
with the two Marthas, £7 return.
581
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:54,869
ls it fuck, it's Lisbon.
582
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:56,990
- 'ls it Madrid?
- Correct.'
583
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:58,359
CHEERlNG
584
00:33:58,400 --> 00:33:59,833
lt's Barcelona.
585
00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:02,952
'Get it right and you've won £1 ,000,
586
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:05,958
'but if you are wrong,
you go away with absolutely nothing.
587
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:09,072
'So here we go.
How many sides has a dodecahedron?'
588
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:14,236
Fucking great!
589
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,555
'Oh dear, let me think.
590
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:18,989
'Dodecahedron, how many sides...
591
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:23,353
'l'm going to have to push you for an answer,
Sheila.'
592
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:27,154
'Oh, dear, oh, dear... Oh, what can it be? Um...
593
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:29,111
'Oh, um, er....'
594
00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:32,038
'Twelve.'
595
00:34:32,120 --> 00:34:34,076
Congratulations, Sheila.
596
00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:36,634
CHEERlNG
597
00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:39,319
HE MOUTHS
598
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:41,954
We've won! We've won!
599
00:34:42,000 --> 00:34:44,673
Ah! Sheila, we've won!
600
00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:48,873
Oh, Jesus!
601
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:53,310
l saw that, that was assault.
602
00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:55,316
What are you talking about?
603
00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:56,395
l didn't move.
604
00:34:56,440 --> 00:34:59,398
Sorry mate, not from where l'm standing.
605
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:01,795
And unless you call off them swindling lawyers,
606
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:06,072
there's about 20 witnesses here
that'll swear that you just hit him.
607
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,156
- lt wasn't me, it was...
- All right Frank?
608
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:11,910
My fucking cap's come off.
609
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:14,679
- This is a fit up.
- Yeah.
610
00:35:14,720 --> 00:35:16,756
Fuck you, ginger!
611
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,314
- Call the police, Jez.
- Just do it, Barry.
612
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:25,717
Your dad's gonna love it.
Pass the other T, Carl.
613
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:28,433
Can we put it in the window?
614
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:29,469
lf you like.
615
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:37,237
Your bill's cleared, Frank.
Now you're down as a bad debt.
616
00:35:37,280 --> 00:35:39,430
Hope it makes you happy.
617
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:41,948
Come on, let's have a party!
618
00:35:53,320 --> 00:35:55,038
Hiya.
619
00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:56,638
Can l get you a drink, then?
620
00:35:56,680 --> 00:36:01,310
Given this was your idea, mine's a pint.
l'll grab a table.
621
00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:02,349
Fiona.
622
00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:07,155
You're all right, Dad. l'm still going to look after
Liam, so you can fuck off!
623
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:09,111
Sorry l spoke.
624
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:13,118
- The kid should know who its dad is.
- Course it should.
625
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:15,674
You're not having any formal visiting rights.
626
00:36:15,720 --> 00:36:17,517
l'm not asking for that and l won't.
627
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,429
Be a good-looking kid, though, eh?
628
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:23,596
Taking after the father, l suppose.
629
00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:25,119
Taking after both of us.
630
00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:28,193
lt'll be all right, you know.
631
00:36:28,240 --> 00:36:30,196
l know.
632
00:36:30,240 --> 00:36:32,674
Best we don't get too involved.
633
00:36:32,720 --> 00:36:34,358
Absolutely.
634
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:35,719
Could just fuck it all up.
635
00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:36,715
Yeah.
636
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:38,079
We won't, then.
637
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:41,112
MUSlC: Relight My Fire by Take That
638
00:36:44,720 --> 00:36:46,278
We're gonna be really sensible?
639
00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:47,799
Yeah.
640
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:49,034
Ah!
641
00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:52,474
Fiona? Can this wait?
642
00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:55,988
FlONA MOANS
643
00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:21,958
- What are them?
- Strawberry undies. They taste nice.
644
00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:29,154
ls Frank here yet?
645
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:33,159
l don't think so, has anyone seen Dad?
He was celebrating last night.
646
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:35,555
Has he heard already?
They must have called him.
647
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:39,639
l've been on the go all morning. Ha, ha, ha!
648
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:42,035
Congratulations on last night.
649
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:44,469
Oh, thank you.
Oh, the phone's not stopped ringing.
650
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:48,877
lsn't it lovely how many people
call you when you've won something?
651
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:53,034
Look, you can go back through
to my side if you like.
652
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:54,069
(All) Wooooo!
653
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:57,157
How is that an innuendo?
654
00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:59,760
Actually, l'd better get off,
l've got a session with someone.
655
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:01,472
(All) Woooh!
656
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:03,988
Grow up! Sorry.
657
00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:09,160
- Good excuse, they are a bit of a handful.
- Not half.
658
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:11,675
Cheers.
659
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:19,475
Right. Who's in tonight?
660
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:22,592
Because l just got paid,
so the fish and chips are on me!
661
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:24,437
CHEERlNG
662
00:38:24,480 --> 00:38:26,516
Come on, we'd better go and find Dad.
663
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:29,199
l forgot to ask. Do you fancy going for a drink?
664
00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:30,958
(All) Wooo!
665
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:32,956
When?
666
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:35,230
Tonight?
667
00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:36,599
You come to mine.
668
00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:37,959
Sure.
669
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:44,595
What?
670
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:48,239
HE RELEASES THE BALLS
671
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,673
HACKlNG COUGH
672
00:39:03,240 --> 00:39:05,390
Oh, Jesus, l dreamt l was dead.
673
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:08,318
Yeah, l have that dream.
674
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:13,714
Sorry about that, Sheila, got a bit late last
night. l forgot he was there.
675
00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:17,070
- (Hello Frank.)
- Hello.
676
00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:18,678
Oh, Christ.
677
00:39:18,720 --> 00:39:22,030
Need a cup of tea. Where the fuck am l?
678
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,071
l'll put the kettle on.
679
00:39:27,120 --> 00:39:29,111
(Sheila) Frank.
680
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:32,556
l won Grab My Grand last night.
681
00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:35,273
£1 ,000.
682
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:37,834
Oh, yeah, l remember.
683
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,633
- Sheila.
- Yeah.
684
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:42,159
l love you.
685
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:49,750
And l went to see the district manager
of Accident Jackpot this morning.
686
00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:51,472
l've paid him.
687
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:52,873
You're a free man.
688
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:54,672
What?
689
00:39:54,720 --> 00:39:55,914
You don't owe a penny!
690
00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:00,795
Oh, Jesus.
691
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:10,031
l was doing my best, Frank.
692
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:13,516
A thousand fucking quid.
693
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:15,710
There is nearly £80 change.
694
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:18,194
That won't pay the bar bill.
695
00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:27,639
This came this morning.
696
00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:30,240
Second prize - Satin FM.
697
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,989
Frank, l'm getting quite a taste for this.
698
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:37,874
l should be so lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky
699
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:40,229
l should be so lucky...
700
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,874
(Fiona) 'Sheila celebrated
winning that money for weeks.
701
00:40:42,920 --> 00:40:46,913
'For the rest of us, the notion of another mouth
to feed wasn't anything new,
702
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:51,590
'but the idea that it wasn't another offspring
of Dad's took a bit of getting used to.'
703
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:56,436
l'm a good human being
with a great deal to offer.
704
00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:58,630
- NOOOOOOOOOOO!
- Ahhh!
705
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:03,515
Once the court see you're respectable and
hard-working, they'll have to acquit you.
706
00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:05,437
- Boo!
- Aaargh!
707
00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:06,913
So why are you back?
708
00:41:06,960 --> 00:41:09,428
Because, Blondie, l fell in love.
709
00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:15,559
Marty, no!
710
00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:19,275
Did you think somebody like her
would be interested in a freak like you?
711
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:21,117
Beauty's everywhere.
712
00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,355
Just depends whether you choose to see it.
713
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:25,914
(Marty) 'l'm a good human being
714
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:27,791
'with a great deal to offer.
715
00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:28,829
'l am a...'
716
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:30,675
Boner! Sorry!
717
00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:20,029
Eight letters, COPULATE!
718
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:21,593
SHE LAUGHS
719
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:22,834
Sorry.
720
00:42:22,884 --> 00:42:27,434
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