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1
00:00:01,267 --> 00:00:02,256
They weren't
officially booked.
2
00:00:02,335 --> 00:00:04,803
So, it's not going to
go on their records.
3
00:00:04,871 --> 00:00:06,065
Mom, it wasn't my weed.
4
00:00:06,139 --> 00:00:09,074
I want you to know you made
me mad and you embarrassed me,
5
00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:11,610
and it's going to be a long time
before you earn my trust back.
6
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:14,169
I know you think
Racquel is intense.
7
00:00:14,247 --> 00:00:15,271
She's a great mom.
8
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:18,715
You don't have to choose between
being a mom and having to work.
9
00:00:18,785 --> 00:00:20,082
You may not be
there all the time,
10
00:00:20,153 --> 00:00:21,677
but the time that you do
have, you can make that count.
11
00:00:21,988 --> 00:00:24,149
It was mine.
The pot, it was mine.
12
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,656
Sorry for not being the
girl that you thought I was.
13
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,795
What makes
all this worth it?
14
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:33,765
What makes it worth it is the
connection, it's the bond you feel.
15
00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:36,199
Well, what if I don't
feel a connection, then?
16
00:00:36,269 --> 00:00:37,361
You will.
17
00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:46,443
What is this?
18
00:00:47,313 --> 00:00:48,507
Oh! Crosby.
19
00:00:48,581 --> 00:00:51,379
Oh, that's
my mixing beaker.
20
00:00:51,451 --> 00:00:52,440
Yeah.
21
00:00:52,519 --> 00:00:53,679
What do you mix in it?
22
00:00:54,020 --> 00:00:56,989
Oh, you know, frozen
orange juice and stuff.
23
00:00:57,223 --> 00:00:58,588
It stinks.
24
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:01,584
Hey, be careful out there. Stay close.
25
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:03,718
Okay, are we done here,
do you think?
26
00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:05,958
Yeah, yeah,
we are almost done.
27
00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,167
Do you even know
who these belong to?
28
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:10,429
Of course.
29
00:01:11,104 --> 00:01:13,504
You know what, I think
Kristina left them here.
30
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,063
Yeah, very funny.
31
00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:17,143
Hey, I know we're doing all
this child-proofing here,
32
00:01:17,210 --> 00:01:19,508
but you sure
you wouldn't rather
33
00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,638
have this sleepover
over at our house?
34
00:01:22,315 --> 00:01:24,249
Oh, you don't think
I can handle it?
35
00:01:26,853 --> 00:01:29,321
All right, you know, it's
going to be good for you.
36
00:01:29,656 --> 00:01:33,183
You're going to get to have
your son here with you and
37
00:01:34,694 --> 00:01:35,820
you get to
watch him sleep,
38
00:01:35,895 --> 00:01:37,920
and just see how innocent
and vulnerable and...
39
00:01:37,997 --> 00:01:39,089
And peaceful?
40
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:42,395
Yeah. Yeah.
41
00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:46,270
Yeah, you know... You know,
I've dated some wild women,
42
00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,167
real hellcats, but,
43
00:01:49,175 --> 00:01:50,870
you know, when they
finally pass out,
44
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:54,175
it's like they turn into
these little kittens,
45
00:01:54,347 --> 00:01:56,542
all purry
and warm and...
46
00:01:56,916 --> 00:01:59,544
So, you know, I know
what you're talking about.
47
00:02:03,022 --> 00:02:04,080
I feel ya.
48
00:02:04,157 --> 00:02:05,146
Yeah.
49
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,925
Are you sure?
Do you want some?
50
00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:08,182
Oh! Oh, no, no.
51
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:10,421
Oh, oh, sorry. I'm so sorry.
I'm just going to have some...
52
00:02:10,497 --> 00:02:12,055
Granddaughter,
what are you doing?
53
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:15,124
We're dining.
Would you like some?
54
00:02:15,268 --> 00:02:16,963
Aw, gee, thanks, no,
55
00:02:17,070 --> 00:02:18,332
I've got something
I have to do.
56
00:02:18,404 --> 00:02:20,599
But I appreciate it.
Really. It looks like fun.
57
00:02:20,673 --> 00:02:22,300
- Oh, hey, Kristina.
- Yeah?
58
00:02:22,375 --> 00:02:24,172
Could Haddie babysit
for us tomorrow night?
59
00:02:24,244 --> 00:02:25,768
'Cause our regular sitter
has the flu.
60
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:28,211
Yeah, I don't see why not. Hey, Haddie!
61
00:02:29,082 --> 00:02:30,549
Haddie!
What?
62
00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:33,085
Can you babysit tomorrow
night for Aunt Julia?
63
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:37,012
You know what, I would
really like to, but...
64
00:02:38,525 --> 00:02:40,925
But? You have plans? What?
65
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,651
That's fine, sweetie. KRISTINA:
She doesn't have plans.
66
00:02:42,795 --> 00:02:43,887
She has nothing to do.
67
00:02:43,963 --> 00:02:44,952
It's not like
she has to, though.
68
00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:46,589
You know? KRISTINA:
She has nothing to do.
69
00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,293
Well, she's...
What about Amber?
70
00:02:49,068 --> 00:02:50,467
Oh, whoa...
71
00:02:53,106 --> 00:02:54,130
Yeah.
72
00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:55,196
And she's
sitting right there.
73
00:02:55,275 --> 00:02:56,435
Yeah.
74
00:02:57,977 --> 00:02:59,069
That's a great idea.
75
00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:00,169
That's a perfect idea.
76
00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:01,736
Yeah, I hadn't thought
of that. That's great.
77
00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:02,940
Yeah.
Okay.
78
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:04,244
Let me just ask her.
79
00:03:06,219 --> 00:03:08,517
Hey. Do you want to
babysit for Aunt Julia?
80
00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:12,224
Hello? Hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey.
81
00:03:12,425 --> 00:03:14,325
Oy! What's wrong
with you?
82
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,324
Aunt Julia wants you
to babysit.
83
00:03:16,563 --> 00:03:17,894
Oh, so you're
waterboarding me?
84
00:03:17,964 --> 00:03:19,158
Aunt Julia
wants you to babysit.
85
00:03:19,232 --> 00:03:20,460
Okay, whoa, take it easy.
86
00:03:21,634 --> 00:03:22,896
Yeah, sure.
Why not?
87
00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:25,699
Yeah, yeah. No, I thought
so. Good, okay, she'd love to.
88
00:03:26,005 --> 00:03:27,199
Great.
- Great.
89
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:28,831
Smile.
Thank you. Awesome.
90
00:03:28,908 --> 00:03:30,808
No prob.
Great. Problem solved.
91
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,975
Hey, go tell your brother
that we're ready to eat.
92
00:03:34,113 --> 00:03:36,274
There's no way I'm going near
that bathroom while he's in it.
93
00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:37,872
Which is
five times a day.
94
00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:40,385
Oh, that's an exaggeration.
She's exaggerating.
95
00:03:40,453 --> 00:03:42,148
You do know what he's
doing in there, don't you?
96
00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:44,782
Yes, he's getting clean.
97
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:47,084
Yeah, spankin' clean.
98
00:03:48,094 --> 00:03:50,858
He's... He has like, you
know, he's working on his hair.
99
00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:52,261
He's got like that...
I do that too.
100
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:53,663
You know, for a long time sometimes.
101
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,701
Hi, honey.
Hi. Hey.
102
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,563
Hey, Drew.
Morning.
103
00:03:59,205 --> 00:04:00,866
Hey, bud,
how was the shower?
104
00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:02,772
Your hair looks cute.
105
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,877
Honey, does Crosby know
that I know about Jabbar?
106
00:04:08,948 --> 00:04:10,643
Well, I think he assumes
I tell you everything.
107
00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:14,050
Why would he assume that? He hasn't
even told Katie he has a son yet.
108
00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:16,486
Well, I think Crosby
assumes I'm not like him.
109
00:04:16,556 --> 00:04:18,524
Mmm-hmm, I think Crosby
assumes correctly.
110
00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,218
Which is why he should
not be making jokes
111
00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:23,228
about my underpants being
in his houseboat. Weirdo.
112
00:04:23,363 --> 00:04:25,160
You mean crotch-less panties?
113
00:04:25,231 --> 00:04:26,391
So...
114
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,758
Wait a... Honey.
115
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:31,368
Yeah?
What is this?
116
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:34,438
$220? Look at that.
117
00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:36,197
That's Haddie's cell.
118
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:39,803
Yeah, she's racked up, like, a
gazillion minutes on this thing.
119
00:04:39,879 --> 00:04:41,642
Yeah, to one number
over and over again.
120
00:04:41,714 --> 00:04:43,204
She's sleeping over at
Leslie's. Please call her.
121
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:44,807
This is not acceptable.
122
00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:47,682
I don't even
recognize this number.
123
00:04:47,754 --> 00:04:49,221
She's never called
this number before.
124
00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:51,687
Who is this?
125
00:04:53,159 --> 00:04:54,683
All right, she's not
picking up.
126
00:04:56,095 --> 00:04:57,619
Who are you
calling now?
127
00:04:57,697 --> 00:04:59,164
I'm gonna call
the mystery number
128
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:00,529
and find out
who this belongs to.
129
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,363
Okay. Oh, put it on
speaker, I want to hear it.
130
00:05:02,435 --> 00:05:03,424
All right.
131
00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:12,300
Yo. Yo. Yo.
Whassup?
132
00:05:13,212 --> 00:05:14,201
Okay, you dialed wrong.
133
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:15,770
You had to have dialed wrong.
No, I did not dial wrong.
134
00:05:15,848 --> 00:05:17,611
You had to have dialed wrong.
All right, here. Here you go.
135
00:05:17,684 --> 00:05:18,673
Try it yourself.
Go ahead.
136
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:30,990
Yo. Yo. Yo. Whassup?
137
00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:20,913
Honey, wait a second.
What?
138
00:06:20,980 --> 00:06:23,005
I just think that we should
let her explain herself
139
00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:24,777
before breaking
into her room. I...
140
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,944
Well, wait, wait a minute,
her room is in our house,
141
00:06:27,019 --> 00:06:28,850
so technically we're not
breaking into anything.
142
00:06:28,921 --> 00:06:30,445
She's 15 years old.
143
00:06:30,823 --> 00:06:32,518
Besides, what she doesn't
know won't hurt her.
144
00:06:32,592 --> 00:06:34,321
Right, just us.
145
00:06:34,594 --> 00:06:35,618
Go ahead.
Okay.
146
00:06:35,695 --> 00:06:36,855
- No, you go ahead.
- All right.
147
00:06:36,929 --> 00:06:38,089
You wanted to
do this. All right, okay.
148
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:39,392
We'll just get in,
we'll get out. All right.
149
00:06:39,465 --> 00:06:41,365
Get in, get out.
Let's do it.
150
00:06:42,468 --> 00:06:43,867
What exactly
are we looking for?
151
00:06:43,936 --> 00:06:45,528
I don't know, anything
that smells like "Yo-Yo."
152
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:48,064
Smells like "Yo-Yo."
153
00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:49,672
Okay.
154
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,672
Hey, what about
her computer?
155
00:06:51,811 --> 00:06:52,971
Her Facebook page.
What about that?
156
00:06:53,045 --> 00:06:54,535
All right. Good idea, good idea.
157
00:06:54,614 --> 00:06:56,138
Okay.
All right.
158
00:06:57,350 --> 00:06:59,318
I don't know
her password.
159
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:00,977
Oh, I used to know it.
160
00:07:01,053 --> 00:07:02,145
All right.
161
00:07:02,221 --> 00:07:04,018
HaddieDaddy.
162
00:07:04,390 --> 00:07:05,414
Really?
That's sweet.
163
00:07:05,491 --> 00:07:07,254
Mmm-hmm, she was 12.
164
00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:11,054
And she's changed it.
I don't know.
165
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,467
Yo.
Yo.
166
00:07:18,004 --> 00:07:20,700
Can I shower in here? The
masturbatorium is occupied.
167
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,174
Please, will you
give him a break?
168
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,107
Please not shame
your brother.
169
00:07:25,178 --> 00:07:27,510
He's 14, okay?
He has needs.
170
00:07:27,580 --> 00:07:29,980
I think I know pretty much
everything there is to know about
171
00:07:30,049 --> 00:07:31,539
fourteen-year-old boys
and their needs.
172
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:33,081
Thank you for that.
173
00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:35,620
Oh, Aunt Julia called.
I don't have to babysit.
174
00:07:35,988 --> 00:07:36,977
Why not?
175
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,283
I don't know.
176
00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:41,589
Well, what'd she say?
What was the reason?
177
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:43,154
Who cares?
178
00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:44,556
I care.
179
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:46,655
I'm gonna shower.
180
00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:48,233
She didn't give
any reason at all?
181
00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:50,392
She didn't postpone?
Did she...
182
00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:52,896
Hello?
183
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:00,076
So, I heard the
kid-proofing went well.
184
00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:01,738
Indeed.
185
00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:03,941
Even found
something of mine.
186
00:08:05,351 --> 00:08:07,216
At least I didn't mention
your special mixing beaker.
187
00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:08,949
What mixing beaker?
188
00:08:09,021 --> 00:08:10,045
Okay, look, I got it.
189
00:08:10,122 --> 00:08:11,419
What?
Haddieho.
190
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:12,788
"Haddieho"?
Uh-huh.
191
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,153
That's not good.
192
00:08:14,227 --> 00:08:15,888
It says she's in
a relationship,
193
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:17,587
has been for a month.
194
00:08:17,663 --> 00:08:19,358
A month?
Is that him? Is that him?
195
00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:22,493
Must be.
Yo-Yo.
196
00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:24,903
AKA Steve Williams.
197
00:08:25,471 --> 00:08:27,268
He's a junior at
Haddie's high school.
198
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,304
Junior. What else? What else? What else?
199
00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:30,433
Well, he's got
a rap sheet.
200
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:32,000
What? That's not funny.
201
00:08:32,078 --> 00:08:33,067
It's not even close.
202
00:08:33,145 --> 00:08:35,204
Okay, look,
they're Facebook official.
203
00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:36,339
They're not eloping
to Vegas.
204
00:08:36,582 --> 00:08:38,049
"Facebook official"?
205
00:08:38,451 --> 00:08:40,612
It's not a suicide pact,
they're just dating.
206
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:44,655
How much masturbating
is too much?
207
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,552
I'm sorry. What?
208
00:08:46,626 --> 00:08:48,184
For Drew.
209
00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:51,191
He's in the bathroom,
like, a lot.
210
00:08:51,430 --> 00:08:52,988
Like, six or seven
times a day.
211
00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:54,965
Look, Sarah, that's
totally normal. Okay, so...
212
00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:56,968
Is it too much? I don't know what to do.
213
00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:59,732
Look, I've got problems of my
own, okay? Haddie has a boyfriend.
214
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:00,964
Of course Haddie's
got a boyfriend.
215
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,031
She's 15, she's cute.
Adam, don't be a dork.
216
00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:05,600
Yeah, okay, and you know what,
they're Facebook official.
217
00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:08,169
And, you know, she hasn't said
anything to Kristina and I about it.
218
00:09:08,247 --> 00:09:09,976
Well, of course she doesn't
talk to you about it.
219
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:13,507
That's not a problem, I've got a kid
who I'm afraid might injure himself.
220
00:09:13,819 --> 00:09:16,652
It's the one time I could
actually use some help
221
00:09:16,722 --> 00:09:18,713
from his lame father,
who won't call me back.
222
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:20,986
You know, with Amber,
she got her period,
223
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,460
I said, "You okay?"
She said, "Screw you."
224
00:09:23,529 --> 00:09:25,588
She was fine,
but him, I just...
225
00:09:25,665 --> 00:09:26,654
So?
226
00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:28,632
I can't be the man
for him, you know?
227
00:09:28,701 --> 00:09:30,669
Oh, you're asking me
to talk to him about it?
228
00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:31,930
Oh, God, Adam,
would you?
229
00:09:32,004 --> 00:09:33,471
Yeah, absolutely.
No problem.
230
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,564
Just don't make him
feel weird, okay?
231
00:09:35,675 --> 00:09:37,074
He's just so sensitive.
232
00:09:37,209 --> 00:09:40,269
Just tell him that it's
normal, or almost normal,
233
00:09:40,346 --> 00:09:41,472
and he's becoming a man.
234
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:42,673
I'm going to welcome
him to the club.
235
00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:43,840
Yeah.
All that stuff.
236
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:46,043
Just be positive
and encourage him
237
00:09:46,118 --> 00:09:49,576
to express himself in other
ways, too, you know, with...
238
00:09:49,655 --> 00:09:50,952
What, like
downloading porn?
239
00:09:51,023 --> 00:09:52,047
Oh, God.
240
00:09:52,124 --> 00:09:53,182
That's outside
the shower.
241
00:09:54,860 --> 00:09:56,259
Hey, Sarah. Oh, yeah, good.
Hey.
242
00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:57,728
I'm glad I got you.
We need to talk here.
243
00:09:57,797 --> 00:09:59,355
Okay, I got to get to
work. Dad, what's up?
244
00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:03,095
Well, honey, are you aware that
we're in the middle of a drought?
245
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:04,397
What? No?
246
00:10:04,470 --> 00:10:07,735
Well, somebody in the house
is using an awful lot of water.
247
00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:10,838
Oh, yeah, that.
248
00:10:11,143 --> 00:10:13,077
So, from an environmental standpoint,
249
00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:15,045
I was thinking we need
to do something here.
250
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,809
Yeah, I'm as green
as the next person, Dad,
251
00:10:16,882 --> 00:10:18,713
but he's a 14-year-old boy.
I don't know what to tell you.
252
00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:22,345
That's why I would like to
talk to him, mano a mano.
253
00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:23,949
Oh, no.
254
00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:26,382
I still bear
the emotional scars
255
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,927
of the little talk we
had when I was a kid
256
00:10:28,995 --> 00:10:30,485
and that was
a long, long time ago.
257
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:32,326
Don't say anything
to him, please.
258
00:10:32,398 --> 00:10:34,457
Well, sweetheart,
this is not woman's work.
259
00:10:34,533 --> 00:10:36,330
Dad, way to be
progressive, Dad.
260
00:10:36,402 --> 00:10:38,199
Come on, honey,
I'm a grandfather.
261
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:40,500
That's what grandfathers
are for. Send me in there.
262
00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:43,468
Dad, thank you
so much for this offer.
263
00:10:43,542 --> 00:10:47,444
But, under no circumstances are
you to talk to Drew about the...
264
00:10:47,513 --> 00:10:48,502
Masturbation.
265
00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:51,414
Don't talk to him
about it. Okay? Thanks.
266
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,042
Well, honey,
it's perfectly natural.
267
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:54,609
I mean, even I
on occasion still...
268
00:10:57,189 --> 00:10:58,247
Not obsessively.
269
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,058
Permission
to come aboard?
270
00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:04,926
Oh, no, pirates!
271
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,428
What's up,
sleepover buddy?
272
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,524
Nothing.
273
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:10,398
Nothing?
You ready for this?
274
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:12,364
Me too.
275
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:15,532
I can't tell you how much
I appreciate this, Crosby.
276
00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:18,543
Are you kidding? I'm fired
up. I should be thanking you.
277
00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:21,705
Can I get a hug?
Can I get a hug? Oh.
278
00:11:22,014 --> 00:11:23,242
You be good, okay?
279
00:11:23,315 --> 00:11:24,304
Okay.
280
00:11:25,051 --> 00:11:28,748
So, I'm available 24l7
281
00:11:28,821 --> 00:11:31,346
except for the two hours
that I'll be dancing.
282
00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:32,618
So, if anything,
283
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,456
if you need me, just call
me. I'll be here. Anything.
284
00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:38,361
You don't need to worry.
Look, I baby-proofed the...
285
00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:41,590
...crap out
of this place.
286
00:11:41,667 --> 00:11:42,793
Okay.
287
00:11:43,202 --> 00:11:44,499
Nothing's going to
go wrong, right, Jabbar?
288
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,631
He knows.
Safety first here.
289
00:11:49,742 --> 00:11:51,369
You're a doll.
Thank you.
290
00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:52,843
Thank you.
Thank you.
291
00:11:52,912 --> 00:11:53,901
Have fun.
292
00:11:53,979 --> 00:11:55,879
Okay, no girls allowed.
293
00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:58,009
Bye!
You're gross.
294
00:12:00,119 --> 00:12:01,609
Cheese or pepperoni?
295
00:12:01,954 --> 00:12:03,046
Pepperoni.
296
00:12:03,322 --> 00:12:04,653
Pepperoni.
297
00:12:04,824 --> 00:12:07,588
Your cell phone
bill was over $200 this month.
298
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:08,718
You're kidding?
No.
299
00:12:08,794 --> 00:12:09,783
I had no idea.
300
00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:12,057
That's over
a thousand minutes.
301
00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:14,031
Okay, well, I'll pay
you guys back.
302
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:16,625
I'll babysit. I'll do chores,
you know, whatever it takes.
303
00:12:16,702 --> 00:12:18,101
That's like 18 hours
in one month.
304
00:12:18,170 --> 00:12:19,831
To one number.
One number.
305
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:21,099
Steve Williams?
306
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,734
How do you guys
know that?
307
00:12:26,512 --> 00:12:29,675
Well, when we couldn't reach
you, we called his number.
308
00:12:30,549 --> 00:12:31,811
You guys talked to Steve?
309
00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:33,283
No, we did not
talk to him.
310
00:12:33,352 --> 00:12:35,217
We just heard his voice.
We heard his voice.
311
00:12:35,287 --> 00:12:36,481
"Yo. Yo. Yo."
312
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:39,350
So, how do you
know his name?
313
00:12:40,526 --> 00:12:41,959
We have our ways.
314
00:12:42,194 --> 00:12:44,628
What ways?
What did you guys do?
315
00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:45,686
We went on your computer.
316
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,027
Your Facebook page.
317
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:49,092
No, you didn't!
318
00:12:49,168 --> 00:12:50,157
Mmm-hmm.
Mmm-hmm.
319
00:12:50,636 --> 00:12:53,070
You guys broke into my room
320
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:55,900
and you hacked into
my computer?
321
00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:58,967
Wait a second, miss, you have
no right to get angry with us.
322
00:12:59,044 --> 00:13:01,740
You have been going out with this boy
for over a month without telling us.
323
00:13:01,814 --> 00:13:04,112
Okay, who cares,
Homeland Security?
324
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:05,582
What you guys did
is illegal.
325
00:13:05,651 --> 00:13:09,587
You can't do that, it's
a violation of everything.
326
00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:10,644
Oh, no, no, no.
327
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:12,281
You're Facebook official.
328
00:13:12,358 --> 00:13:13,416
Right.
329
00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:15,016
That's right.
You go up to your room
330
00:13:15,094 --> 00:13:16,425
because you're grounded.
Grounded!
331
00:13:21,233 --> 00:13:22,427
Sucked.
332
00:13:55,734 --> 00:13:57,292
Hey.
Hey.
333
00:13:57,803 --> 00:13:59,202
How did you know that
I was here on a Sunday?
334
00:13:59,271 --> 00:14:02,763
Oh, I was talking to Joel and
I'm on my way to work, so...
335
00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:05,302
I'm so busy,
it's insane.
336
00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:07,839
Is that why
you canceled Amber?
337
00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:10,571
Yeah.
338
00:14:11,317 --> 00:14:13,285
Yeah.
If they had their way,
339
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:16,412
I would never get to see Sydney,
let alone have a date night. So...
340
00:14:17,389 --> 00:14:21,291
'Cause Joel said you canceled
because she doesn't know the area.
341
00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:25,628
Yeah. Well, I mean, it was a combination
of that and the work, you know?
342
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,666
Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
343
00:14:29,301 --> 00:14:30,825
She was really
disappointed.
344
00:14:31,770 --> 00:14:32,759
She was?
345
00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:37,133
She thinks that you don't think
she's responsible or capable.
346
00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:40,904
She didn't sound disappointed
when I talked to her.
347
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,709
She was. She was
really disappointed,
348
00:14:42,781 --> 00:14:44,009
'cause, you know,
back in Fresno,
349
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:45,983
she was a really
popular babysitter.
350
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:47,951
Everybody called her.
She was the go-to girl.
351
00:14:48,787 --> 00:14:50,550
I did not know that.
352
00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:54,482
Well, now you do.
353
00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:57,422
Sarah.
354
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:02,760
Sorry.
355
00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:07,703
Don't apologize to me.
356
00:15:24,823 --> 00:15:25,949
How's it going, Drew?
357
00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:27,219
Okay.
358
00:15:28,727 --> 00:15:33,027
Oh, Grandpa made me do the
same thing when I was your age,
359
00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:35,293
wash his old truck. Sucks.
360
00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,295
Yeah.
361
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:39,631
How's everything else?
362
00:15:39,838 --> 00:15:40,930
Good.
363
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,070
Yeah, I hated washing
the old truck.
364
00:15:48,580 --> 00:15:51,572
But there was something I really
enjoyed doing when I was your age.
365
00:15:52,017 --> 00:15:53,279
Oh, yeah? What?
366
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:56,810
And it's nothing to be ashamed
of. It's totally natural.
367
00:15:57,222 --> 00:15:59,122
You know,
Woody Allen said,
368
00:15:59,191 --> 00:16:01,751
"Masturbation is having sex with
somebody you love," you know?
369
00:16:01,827 --> 00:16:02,953
Did my mom ask you
to talk to me about this?
370
00:16:03,028 --> 00:16:05,121
No, no, she may
have mentioned it.
371
00:16:05,230 --> 00:16:07,357
But, I wanted to
talk to you about it
372
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:09,765
because, Drew,
it's totally normal, okay?
373
00:16:09,835 --> 00:16:11,769
And I want to make sure you
don't feel weird about it.
374
00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:14,237
We can just,
you know,
375
00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:16,933
air it out.
Air it out?
376
00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:18,203
Well, you know, I just
wanted to make sure
377
00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:19,574
there's no stigma
attached to it
378
00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:20,901
like hair growing
on your palms.
379
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:23,205
Yeah, can we just
not talk and say we did?
380
00:16:23,282 --> 00:16:25,250
Yeah, but I...
Thank you.
381
00:16:25,351 --> 00:16:29,082
I just wanted you to know that you can
talk to me about anything, all right,
382
00:16:29,154 --> 00:16:32,214
like pimples, girls,
birth control.
383
00:16:32,424 --> 00:16:34,187
You know about rubbers,
right? Prophylactics?
384
00:16:34,259 --> 00:16:36,250
Look, we can just
not talk, too, right?
385
00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:39,459
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
It's no big deal.
386
00:16:40,366 --> 00:16:42,391
Okay, well, you just,
you keep up the good work.
387
00:16:42,768 --> 00:16:44,929
With the washing the truck,
I mean. Not the...
388
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,528
Or the other thing, too,
if you want, 'cause...
389
00:16:48,607 --> 00:16:50,404
All right, I'm glad
we had this talk.
390
00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:57,271
All right, all right,
I had no choice.
391
00:16:57,349 --> 00:17:00,341
Sarah started asking about
other nights Amber could babysit
392
00:17:00,419 --> 00:17:02,319
and I couldn't think
of anything else to say.
393
00:17:02,388 --> 00:17:05,118
So, mea culpa,
I totally blew it.
394
00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:07,852
Oh. Oh, no, it's fine.
I blew it too.
395
00:17:08,060 --> 00:17:09,186
You did?
396
00:17:09,395 --> 00:17:12,489
We should never have
canceled in the first place.
397
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:15,559
Wait, so now
we trust Amber?
398
00:17:15,634 --> 00:17:17,864
She is a very experienced
babysitter.
399
00:17:17,936 --> 00:17:19,267
Says your sister.
400
00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:21,436
I trust my sister.
401
00:17:21,940 --> 00:17:24,170
Oh, jeez, I'm sorry.
I forgot the cardinal rule.
402
00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:26,711
"Only a Braverman can
criticize another Braverman."
403
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,679
All right.
You're right.
404
00:17:28,814 --> 00:17:31,214
I'm sorry. That's a
total double standard.
405
00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:32,439
Thank you.
406
00:17:32,651 --> 00:17:34,676
One about which
we can do nothing.
407
00:17:36,155 --> 00:17:38,146
Hey, so, what are we
going to do?
408
00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:40,153
I was thinking that
we should call Amber
409
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:41,522
and see if she can
still come over tonight.
410
00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:43,251
You're sure about this?
411
00:17:43,328 --> 00:17:45,296
No, but, I'm optimistic.
412
00:17:47,566 --> 00:17:48,624
So am I.
413
00:17:48,700 --> 00:17:50,224
Good.
Good. Date night.
414
00:17:50,302 --> 00:17:51,291
Yay!
415
00:17:51,770 --> 00:17:54,204
So, how did it go? What
happened? What did you say?
416
00:17:54,273 --> 00:17:56,036
I think I did okay,
considering.
417
00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:59,566
Really? Well, you didn't use
the word, though, did you?
418
00:17:59,645 --> 00:18:00,703
Why?
419
00:18:00,779 --> 00:18:04,374
Because, it's just so clinical,
you know, "masturbate."
420
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:08,011
Uh-huh. Do you think it's time
to let Haddie out of her room?
421
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:11,147
It's against the rules to eat
peanut butter out of the jar, Dad.
422
00:18:12,157 --> 00:18:13,249
You are absolutely
right, buddy.
423
00:18:13,325 --> 00:18:15,190
You're right.
Does that mean I can?
424
00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:17,125
No, that means
that Dad cannot.
425
00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:18,786
You cannot,
you broke the rule.
426
00:18:18,864 --> 00:18:19,922
I broke the rule.
427
00:18:19,998 --> 00:18:21,795
- He broke the rule.
- Broke the rule.
428
00:18:21,867 --> 00:18:23,095
Hey, you know what,
can you do me a favor?
429
00:18:23,168 --> 00:18:24,829
Can you tell your sister
to come downstairs?
430
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:26,461
No.
431
00:18:27,573 --> 00:18:28,597
Why not?
432
00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:29,971
Because she's not upstairs.
433
00:18:31,376 --> 00:18:32,900
Yes, she is, honey.
She's in her room.
434
00:18:33,178 --> 00:18:34,372
No, she's not.
435
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:48,787
Yo-Yo lives here?
436
00:18:48,861 --> 00:18:50,761
Honey, don't judge
a book by its cover.
437
00:18:50,829 --> 00:18:52,820
You can cook meth
anywhere. I told you that.
438
00:18:54,366 --> 00:18:55,697
I'm out.
Kristina. Kristina!
439
00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:56,756
You're Adam Braverman.
440
00:18:56,835 --> 00:18:59,030
And you must be
Kristina and Max.
441
00:18:59,171 --> 00:19:00,160
Yeah, hi.
442
00:19:00,239 --> 00:19:01,570
Hi.
- Hi.
443
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,301
Yeah, Haddie's
shown us pictures. Yeah.
444
00:19:03,375 --> 00:19:04,808
Yeah, we know, we've
heard all about you.
445
00:19:04,877 --> 00:19:06,572
Max,
stay close, buddy.
446
00:19:06,645 --> 00:19:08,613
He's okay. He's fine.
Okay.
447
00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:11,340
Hi, good to meet you.
We've heard all about you.
448
00:19:12,784 --> 00:19:13,773
Wow.
You have?
449
00:19:13,852 --> 00:19:15,319
Yeah, we just
love her to death.
450
00:19:15,687 --> 00:19:17,348
Oh! So, she's not...
451
00:19:17,422 --> 00:19:18,889
Here? No.
Oh, no.
452
00:19:18,957 --> 00:19:20,151
Neither is Stevie.
453
00:19:20,225 --> 00:19:23,058
Would you like to come in, seeing
as we're Facebook officially related?
454
00:19:23,562 --> 00:19:25,496
Yeah, there's that.
Thank you, thank you.
455
00:19:25,631 --> 00:19:26,791
That's nice of you
but we're just...
456
00:19:26,865 --> 00:19:28,526
Max, please don't pull
the petals off the flowers.
457
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:30,568
Oh, no, no.
It's okay. It's fine.
458
00:19:30,636 --> 00:19:33,901
We understand. Haddie's
told us about the situation.
459
00:19:34,139 --> 00:19:35,265
Yeah.
460
00:19:35,574 --> 00:19:36,563
The what?
461
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:38,672
The situation with Max.
462
00:19:39,711 --> 00:19:41,076
Okay.
What are you doing here?
463
00:19:42,548 --> 00:19:44,641
Oh, well, you know, it's
funny we were just in the...
464
00:19:44,716 --> 00:19:47,048
Checking us out?
I get it.
465
00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:48,143
Yes.
I get it.
466
00:19:48,220 --> 00:19:49,881
Yeah. Caught me.
I understand.
467
00:19:49,955 --> 00:19:51,115
You got me.
If I had a daughter,
468
00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:54,057
I'd want to know where she's spending her
time too. You're doing the right thing.
469
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:55,821
That's all.
It's fine. Don't worry.
470
00:19:56,261 --> 00:19:58,456
Okay, you are the one
that should be pissed.
471
00:19:58,664 --> 00:20:00,154
They were way
out of line.
472
00:20:00,566 --> 00:20:03,626
So, then what do I do when they
start interrogating me again?
473
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:07,138
Well, first, you have to acknowledge
where they're coming from.
474
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:09,766
It's their job to make
your life miserable.
475
00:20:09,841 --> 00:20:11,741
Okay, so what's my job?
476
00:20:12,110 --> 00:20:13,600
Well, to keep them
out of your personal life
477
00:20:13,679 --> 00:20:15,442
for as long as
humanly possible,
478
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:16,673
which isn't going
to be easy.
479
00:20:16,748 --> 00:20:18,875
They're like termites.
They're relentless.
480
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,681
So, then what can I do
to make them stop?
481
00:20:22,254 --> 00:20:25,246
Deception.
Misinformation.
482
00:20:25,757 --> 00:20:28,692
You flat out lie to
their face if you have to.
483
00:20:28,860 --> 00:20:31,021
Although, that does
tend to backfire.
484
00:20:31,096 --> 00:20:32,961
Really gets them
riled up.
485
00:20:33,031 --> 00:20:35,693
Just remember, they
brought this on themselves.
486
00:20:50,115 --> 00:20:51,139
Hey.
Hey.
487
00:20:51,216 --> 00:20:53,013
Thanks for
responding to my APB.
488
00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:54,416
No problem.
How are you?
489
00:20:54,486 --> 00:20:55,680
Great.
Yeah?
490
00:20:56,154 --> 00:20:58,349
Do you know what
you're going to say?
491
00:20:58,624 --> 00:21:00,182
How about,
"Get the hell in the car"?
492
00:21:00,459 --> 00:21:01,756
Great opener.
493
00:21:02,194 --> 00:21:03,991
But after that, what's your
plan? What are you going to do?
494
00:21:04,062 --> 00:21:05,290
I don't
have a plan, Sarah.
495
00:21:05,364 --> 00:21:07,161
No? Have you met this guy?
496
00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:10,334
No, I just heard his voice on the phone.
He's one of these "Yo. Yo. Yo." guys.
497
00:21:10,736 --> 00:21:12,761
That's bad.
Yeah, got that.
498
00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:14,702
Do you think
they're having sex?
499
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:17,071
Haddie's 15. I don't...
500
00:21:17,142 --> 00:21:19,610
Amber was 15 when she
hooked up with Damien.
501
00:21:20,178 --> 00:21:21,406
And they were...
Yes, they were.
502
00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:22,640
She wanted to
move in with him
503
00:21:22,714 --> 00:21:24,944
and start their
lives together.
504
00:21:25,550 --> 00:21:26,881
Well, I don't think
Haddie's there yet.
505
00:21:26,952 --> 00:21:29,284
I mean, I'm sure
she's not. So...
506
00:21:30,589 --> 00:21:31,954
Okay. Okay.
Positive, in fact.
507
00:21:32,658 --> 00:21:35,821
I believe you. But it's
right around the corner.
508
00:21:35,894 --> 00:21:38,454
And you have to do everything
you can to postpone it.
509
00:21:39,865 --> 00:21:40,957
Do you know
how to do that?
510
00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:42,091
No, what do you suggest?
511
00:21:42,167 --> 00:21:44,067
My God, you have to
shut them down.
512
00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:46,195
No phone, no email, no
computer... All right, okay.
513
00:21:46,271 --> 00:21:48,762
...no texting, no leaving
the house, no nothing.
514
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:51,775
And then when that fails,
you just go to Plan B.
515
00:21:51,843 --> 00:21:52,832
Which is what?
516
00:21:52,911 --> 00:21:54,003
Move.
517
00:21:54,946 --> 00:21:56,538
Thanks for that.
518
00:21:57,416 --> 00:21:59,611
Welcome to my world, Brother.
519
00:22:02,888 --> 00:22:04,981
I cannot believe you would
just sneak out like that.
520
00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:07,720
I cannot believe that you
would hack into my computer.
521
00:22:07,793 --> 00:22:10,387
I hacked into your computer to
find out what's going on with you.
522
00:22:10,629 --> 00:22:12,426
What if I don't want you to
know what's going on with me?
523
00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:13,930
I don't care, Haddie.
524
00:22:13,999 --> 00:22:15,864
I'm your father.
I have a right to know.
525
00:22:15,967 --> 00:22:17,730
I have a right
to my privacy.
526
00:22:17,803 --> 00:22:18,792
Not in my house,
you don't.
527
00:22:18,870 --> 00:22:19,894
Okay.
528
00:22:19,971 --> 00:22:23,031
Maybe it's different over at
Steve's house with Marjorie and Dale.
529
00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:28,340
You didn't!
530
00:22:28,413 --> 00:22:29,539
Well, where did
you think we'd go
531
00:22:29,614 --> 00:22:31,013
when we couldn't find
out where you were?
532
00:22:31,416 --> 00:22:32,405
Dad!
533
00:22:32,484 --> 00:22:33,917
We were worried
about you, Haddie.
534
00:22:34,252 --> 00:22:36,584
Oh... Oh, my God!
535
00:22:36,655 --> 00:22:38,054
They knew everything
about us
536
00:22:38,123 --> 00:22:40,387
and we didn't even
know they existed.
537
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,585
How do you think
that felt?
538
00:22:46,898 --> 00:22:48,263
Probably as bad
as it feels
539
00:22:48,333 --> 00:22:50,824
finding out that your parents
have no respect for your privacy.
540
00:22:50,902 --> 00:22:52,130
All right, fine. You
know what, that's it.
541
00:22:52,204 --> 00:22:54,536
No more cell phone.
No more texting.
542
00:22:54,606 --> 00:22:56,039
You go to school.
You come home from school.
543
00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:57,097
That's the way
it's gonna be.
544
00:22:57,175 --> 00:22:58,540
No, you have to be
kidding me! You're kidding!
545
00:22:58,610 --> 00:22:59,668
I am not kidding. Do I
look like I'm kidding?
546
00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:16,653
And last but not least
is poison control center, so...
547
00:23:17,662 --> 00:23:18,993
I think I got it.
Great.
548
00:23:19,064 --> 00:23:20,861
Okay. Oh.
549
00:23:21,700 --> 00:23:23,497
And we're good,
550
00:23:23,969 --> 00:23:26,028
with the whole
scheduling snafu?
551
00:23:26,104 --> 00:23:27,628
Yeah, it was, like,
not a big deal at all.
552
00:23:28,373 --> 00:23:30,170
Your mom said
you were pretty upset.
553
00:23:30,776 --> 00:23:31,765
She did?
554
00:23:36,882 --> 00:23:38,850
I probably overreacted
or something.
555
00:23:39,985 --> 00:23:41,509
Great.
556
00:23:42,053 --> 00:23:43,918
- Hi.
- Hey, there.
557
00:23:44,322 --> 00:23:46,017
Look who's here.
558
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:47,115
Hello!
559
00:23:47,192 --> 00:23:48,955
Amber!
Hi! Come here.
560
00:23:49,027 --> 00:23:50,790
All right.
Where should we go?
561
00:23:50,862 --> 00:23:52,193
Over there.
Okay, let's go.
562
00:23:56,635 --> 00:23:57,727
Yeah.
563
00:23:58,069 --> 00:24:00,560
Okay, so, I guess
we're off.
564
00:24:01,473 --> 00:24:02,940
Okay. Have fun.
565
00:24:03,942 --> 00:24:05,102
Okay.
Okay.
566
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:12,047
Oh, I have my cell phone, and it's on.
567
00:24:12,117 --> 00:24:15,109
So, I do, too, if you've, you
know, got any reason to call.
568
00:24:15,187 --> 00:24:16,415
Okay, see you later,
have fun.
569
00:24:16,488 --> 00:24:17,477
Bye.
570
00:24:17,556 --> 00:24:19,524
Okay. All right. You guys have fun.
571
00:24:19,591 --> 00:24:20,819
Bye.
Not too much fun.
572
00:24:21,193 --> 00:24:22,421
- Got it.
- All right.
573
00:24:22,494 --> 00:24:24,485
- Bye.
- Bye, girls, have fun.
574
00:24:24,563 --> 00:24:25,928
Bye.
575
00:24:26,898 --> 00:24:29,298
Are they
always like that?
576
00:24:30,101 --> 00:24:31,261
Always.
577
00:24:32,137 --> 00:24:33,229
Whew.
578
00:24:36,074 --> 00:24:38,975
Whoa!
Do it some more.
579
00:24:39,578 --> 00:24:40,567
Okay.
580
00:24:42,113 --> 00:24:43,603
More!
581
00:24:43,882 --> 00:24:45,679
Whoo-hoo!
582
00:24:45,750 --> 00:24:47,115
Wow!
583
00:24:50,121 --> 00:24:51,816
I could always
talk to Haddie.
584
00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:53,384
Always.
585
00:24:54,526 --> 00:24:58,485
Honey, rebelling, it's
just part of growing up,
586
00:25:00,398 --> 00:25:01,660
you know?
587
00:25:02,300 --> 00:25:03,767
She hates me.
588
00:25:05,637 --> 00:25:07,901
She doesn't hate you.
She loves you
589
00:25:07,973 --> 00:25:10,942
more than anybody else in this
entire world and you know it.
590
00:25:11,009 --> 00:25:13,000
Do I?
Do I really?
591
00:25:13,778 --> 00:25:14,836
Yes.
592
00:25:15,914 --> 00:25:17,814
But, honey, that's not going
to last forever, you know.
593
00:25:17,883 --> 00:25:21,319
She's going to grow up. She's
going to fall in love. For real.
594
00:25:21,386 --> 00:25:23,115
No, not with that kid,
Yo-Yo, she's not.
595
00:25:23,788 --> 00:25:24,777
Okay.
596
00:25:28,860 --> 00:25:30,384
Well, you know,
597
00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,331
if it's any consolation,
598
00:25:34,566 --> 00:25:37,467
you'll always be the most
important man in my life.
599
00:25:39,204 --> 00:25:40,728
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
600
00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:50,845
How do you
like your dogs,
601
00:25:50,916 --> 00:25:53,544
medium, well done,
or burnt to a crisp?
602
00:25:56,521 --> 00:25:58,546
Uh-oh, we got
a problem there?
603
00:25:58,623 --> 00:26:00,022
It's stuck.
604
00:26:00,725 --> 00:26:03,751
Well, why'd you put
your thumb in a can?
605
00:26:04,429 --> 00:26:05,657
I don't know.
606
00:26:05,730 --> 00:26:08,995
Mmm-hmm. All right, well,
let me take a gander here.
607
00:26:09,467 --> 00:26:10,900
Ow.
Oh, sorry, wow.
608
00:26:11,169 --> 00:26:13,729
That's really in there,
isn't it? Okay.
609
00:26:13,805 --> 00:26:16,501
Hey, I know just the
thing. Not to worry.
610
00:26:17,309 --> 00:26:18,640
Follow me.
611
00:26:18,777 --> 00:26:20,608
One, two, three!
612
00:26:20,679 --> 00:26:22,476
Ow! It stings!
Okay. Oh!
613
00:26:22,547 --> 00:26:24,276
All right.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
614
00:26:24,349 --> 00:26:26,817
Okay, we've got
a little blood here.
615
00:26:26,885 --> 00:26:29,251
Nothing to be
concerned about.
616
00:26:29,321 --> 00:26:31,118
I can't
feel my thumb.
617
00:26:31,356 --> 00:26:32,516
Are you serious?
618
00:26:33,325 --> 00:26:35,122
Okay. Okay.
619
00:26:39,497 --> 00:26:41,556
Oh, I am so
ready for this.
620
00:26:41,633 --> 00:26:42,725
Yeah, me, too.
621
00:26:42,801 --> 00:26:44,291
Joel.
622
00:26:44,569 --> 00:26:45,763
Keep walking.
Keep... Come on.
623
00:26:45,837 --> 00:26:49,500
Joelski! Hi. Hi.
624
00:26:49,574 --> 00:26:52,372
Racquel,
look at this.
625
00:26:52,444 --> 00:26:53,934
Of all the gin joints
in all the world, huh?
626
00:26:54,679 --> 00:26:55,703
Hi.
627
00:26:55,780 --> 00:26:56,838
Hi.
628
00:26:57,215 --> 00:26:58,273
Hi, girl.
629
00:26:58,350 --> 00:26:59,476
Douglas.
Good to see you.
630
00:26:59,551 --> 00:27:01,314
Harmony, hi.
Hi.
631
00:27:01,386 --> 00:27:03,581
And this is Douglas,
my husband.
632
00:27:03,688 --> 00:27:05,679
Come, sit, join us.
Oh, thank you...
633
00:27:05,757 --> 00:27:09,090
That's really sweet, but
we're actually on date night.
634
00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:10,354
So are we.
635
00:27:12,831 --> 00:27:14,093
I work so much.
636
00:27:14,165 --> 00:27:16,827
I can't stand to leave Harmony
alone with a babysitter.
637
00:27:17,135 --> 00:27:18,534
Sure, sure.
That's commendable.
638
00:27:18,603 --> 00:27:19,661
Right.
639
00:27:19,738 --> 00:27:22,263
We're actually... You guys
enjoy, all three of you.
640
00:27:22,340 --> 00:27:23,568
And we'll
see you later.
641
00:27:23,642 --> 00:27:25,166
Nice meeting you.
Enjoy.
642
00:27:28,046 --> 00:27:29,479
What are the odds? Huh?
643
00:27:30,882 --> 00:27:31,940
Ow.
644
00:27:32,017 --> 00:27:33,882
All right. Hang in there,
buddy. You're doing great.
645
00:27:34,919 --> 00:27:36,546
Come on, pick up.
646
00:27:37,022 --> 00:27:38,853
Pick up.
Ow.
647
00:27:48,933 --> 00:27:51,424
Come on! That's all right, Plan B.
648
00:27:52,804 --> 00:27:54,032
I'm sorry.
649
00:27:54,105 --> 00:27:56,596
Oh, buddy,
it's not your fault.
650
00:27:57,275 --> 00:27:58,936
Come on! Okay.
651
00:28:09,154 --> 00:28:12,419
Oh, hi, sorry,
you scared me.
652
00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:15,592
Don't worry, this is my sister's
house, and we're playing a game.
653
00:28:15,660 --> 00:28:17,992
Okay,
have a good night.
654
00:28:27,205 --> 00:28:28,399
Can you do it
like that?
655
00:28:28,473 --> 00:28:29,940
Of course.
656
00:28:43,655 --> 00:28:44,644
Hi.
657
00:28:44,756 --> 00:28:47,020
Okay, come on,
pick up.
658
00:28:47,559 --> 00:28:49,220
Don't let me down.
659
00:28:51,663 --> 00:28:54,632
No, but not Doug.
Not Dougie, Douglas?
660
00:28:54,899 --> 00:28:56,196
Yeah, he's a semiotics
professor.
661
00:28:56,267 --> 00:28:57,632
Okay, well.
662
00:28:58,670 --> 00:29:00,137
She's eating
bouillabaisse, Joel.
663
00:29:00,205 --> 00:29:01,570
What kind of kid
eats bouillabaisse?
664
00:29:01,639 --> 00:29:02,901
Oh, man,
you are so bad.
665
00:29:02,974 --> 00:29:05,465
No, I mean, but Sydney won't
even eat my mac and cheese.
666
00:29:07,212 --> 00:29:08,406
Crosby?
667
00:29:10,148 --> 00:29:11,638
What hospital?
668
00:29:12,817 --> 00:29:13,909
Date of birth?
669
00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:16,817
Five.
670
00:29:17,789 --> 00:29:19,120
He's five.
671
00:29:19,824 --> 00:29:20,848
Address.
672
00:29:20,925 --> 00:29:22,222
Mine or...
His.
673
00:29:23,828 --> 00:29:25,557
Yeah, it's complicated,
so...
674
00:29:25,663 --> 00:29:26,857
Hey.
675
00:29:27,031 --> 00:29:29,226
Oh, thank God.
676
00:29:29,300 --> 00:29:30,289
Who's this?
677
00:29:30,368 --> 00:29:31,892
This is Jabbar.
678
00:29:36,941 --> 00:29:38,135
My son.
679
00:29:46,351 --> 00:29:47,545
Hi.
Hi.
680
00:29:47,619 --> 00:29:50,144
You forgot your
biology textbook.
681
00:29:50,688 --> 00:29:51,746
Oh.
682
00:29:51,923 --> 00:29:54,892
Well, I figured
you might need it.
683
00:29:54,959 --> 00:29:56,824
Wow, that's so
considerate of you. Thanks.
684
00:29:56,895 --> 00:29:58,760
Hey, you know
what's funny?
685
00:29:58,830 --> 00:30:01,958
For a second, I thought maybe
you were checking up on me.
686
00:30:02,867 --> 00:30:04,858
Maybe afraid that I was going
to raid the liquor cabinet.
687
00:30:05,804 --> 00:30:06,964
You have no proof of that.
688
00:30:07,038 --> 00:30:08,767
You lied to Aunt Julia.
689
00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:12,407
You said that I was upset
because I couldn't babysit.
690
00:30:12,777 --> 00:30:14,335
Yeah, 'cause I know
you wanted the money.
691
00:30:14,412 --> 00:30:15,811
Really? Really?
692
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,678
It had nothing to do with you trying
to prove yourself to Aunt Julia?
693
00:30:19,918 --> 00:30:21,510
What?
694
00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:25,812
Okay. That's enough. Just
don't use me next time, okay?
695
00:30:26,090 --> 00:30:27,717
I'm sorry.
696
00:30:27,792 --> 00:30:32,092
Yeah, she just makes me
feel a little insecure.
697
00:30:32,297 --> 00:30:33,423
A little?
Yeah, a little.
698
00:30:33,498 --> 00:30:36,092
Like, you know,
the world's worst mother
699
00:30:36,167 --> 00:30:38,260
and a complete failure at
life, like that kind of little.
700
00:30:43,508 --> 00:30:47,137
Hey, Sydney, do you want to show
Aunt Sarah what we've been working on?
701
00:30:48,112 --> 00:30:49,204
Okay.
702
00:30:49,814 --> 00:30:51,213
Check it out.
703
00:30:51,282 --> 00:30:54,046
Do you remember when we were
living in that crappy motel
704
00:30:54,118 --> 00:30:55,847
after you split up
with Dad,
705
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:58,821
and we had no money
and no toys, no nothing?
706
00:31:01,392 --> 00:31:02,416
No.
707
00:31:02,861 --> 00:31:05,796
Okay, well, I did.
708
00:31:10,468 --> 00:31:11,560
Here.
709
00:31:17,942 --> 00:31:19,842
You made paper turtles.
710
00:31:24,716 --> 00:31:26,308
Amber taught me.
711
00:31:30,655 --> 00:31:32,953
You know who taught
Amber how to do this?
712
00:31:33,224 --> 00:31:34,486
She told me you did.
713
00:31:37,562 --> 00:31:39,325
That's right.
714
00:31:50,408 --> 00:31:52,273
How about I make us
some drinks?
715
00:31:52,343 --> 00:31:55,244
They got a really nice
selection over there.
716
00:32:07,558 --> 00:32:11,494
You see this?
This is a slither cream.
717
00:32:11,562 --> 00:32:14,087
Anything that's stuck,
gets unstuck.
718
00:32:14,499 --> 00:32:15,727
There we go.
719
00:32:15,833 --> 00:32:17,596
All you have to do
is close your eyes.
720
00:32:17,669 --> 00:32:19,534
All right,
take a deep breath.
721
00:32:20,805 --> 00:32:22,830
And say
the magic words.
722
00:32:23,308 --> 00:32:25,606
Slippery,
slither, slime.
723
00:32:25,910 --> 00:32:28,310
Slippery, slither, slime.
- Slippery, slither, slime.
724
00:32:28,546 --> 00:32:30,446
Oh, presto...
Oh, you got it.
725
00:32:30,515 --> 00:32:31,539
It worked.
726
00:32:31,616 --> 00:32:32,640
Come on.
727
00:32:32,717 --> 00:32:34,082
It really worked.
728
00:32:46,064 --> 00:32:47,053
Hey.
729
00:32:48,066 --> 00:32:51,558
Do you think nailing Haddie's
window shut was going too far?
730
00:32:51,869 --> 00:32:55,327
Please tell me you were not
thinking about that earlier.
731
00:32:55,540 --> 00:32:57,872
No. Of course not.
Don't be ridiculous.
732
00:32:57,942 --> 00:32:59,569
Adam.
It just occurred to me.
733
00:32:59,644 --> 00:33:00,668
Really.
Uh-huh.
734
00:33:00,745 --> 00:33:01,769
Honey.
735
00:33:16,828 --> 00:33:17,954
He's sleeping.
736
00:33:20,965 --> 00:33:22,091
So,
737
00:33:24,869 --> 00:33:26,393
are you sure
he's yours?
738
00:33:26,971 --> 00:33:29,269
Why? 'Cause he stuck
his finger in a can?
739
00:33:30,842 --> 00:33:33,470
Because if he is,
you have obligations.
740
00:33:33,711 --> 00:33:36,179
Legal obligations,
financial obligations.
741
00:33:36,247 --> 00:33:38,340
Have you thought
about that?
742
00:33:39,050 --> 00:33:41,780
You were really great
back there in the ER.
743
00:33:41,853 --> 00:33:44,378
Cros, this could be
a big deal, okay?
744
00:33:44,756 --> 00:33:47,452
I'm not kidding.
You're an amazing mom.
745
00:33:50,762 --> 00:33:51,820
I am?
746
00:33:51,896 --> 00:33:54,490
Yeah, like 100%.
747
00:33:57,835 --> 00:34:01,566
Well, thanks.
Thanks for calling me.
748
00:34:01,639 --> 00:34:04,267
I would've thought you'd have
called Adam or Sarah first.
749
00:34:06,444 --> 00:34:08,810
Oh, those deadbeats?
I mean, come on.
750
00:34:40,044 --> 00:34:42,239
When my father found out
that I was dating,
751
00:34:42,313 --> 00:34:44,304
he nearly had a heart attack. I mean...
752
00:34:44,382 --> 00:34:46,009
How old were you?
753
00:34:46,150 --> 00:34:49,483
Oh, 16. Trevor Dunne.
754
00:34:50,988 --> 00:34:53,286
He wore a puka shell necklace,
he was real tan, and...
755
00:34:53,357 --> 00:34:56,622
Okay. Did your dad
nail your window shut?
756
00:34:57,995 --> 00:35:00,520
Honey, my dad was
nothing like yours.
757
00:35:01,032 --> 00:35:02,329
Trust me.
758
00:35:03,668 --> 00:35:06,728
The point is, is when it comes to
dads and their daughters dating,
759
00:35:06,804 --> 00:35:08,704
it's like,
it's primordial.
760
00:35:08,773 --> 00:35:11,071
It's like that lizard part of their
brain kicks in, and they just...
761
00:35:11,142 --> 00:35:13,542
Okay, so, basically
Dad can't help himself.
762
00:35:14,312 --> 00:35:16,644
Right, yeah.
Just like you can't.
763
00:35:17,615 --> 00:35:20,709
So, Dad's just going to hate
Steve no matter how awesome he is?
764
00:35:20,785 --> 00:35:22,582
No, no,
I didn't say that.
765
00:35:22,653 --> 00:35:24,644
I think that he'll
come around eventually,
766
00:35:24,722 --> 00:35:26,349
if he's as awesome
as you say he is.
767
00:35:26,424 --> 00:35:27,891
He is.
He is?
768
00:35:31,696 --> 00:35:32,685
Good.
769
00:35:33,197 --> 00:35:35,597
You have to promise me,
though, no more sneaking around.
770
00:35:37,401 --> 00:35:39,164
Okay, I'm sorry.
771
00:35:42,240 --> 00:35:43,764
How mad is Dad?
772
00:35:46,110 --> 00:35:49,568
You know, honey, I think he's
more scared than anything.
773
00:35:49,647 --> 00:35:50,875
Of what?
774
00:35:52,783 --> 00:35:54,273
Of losing you.
775
00:36:16,674 --> 00:36:19,700
Hey, Drew, coming in.
776
00:36:19,844 --> 00:36:21,141
Hey, no, no, no.
I'm still in here.
777
00:36:21,212 --> 00:36:24,045
So, kiddo, we need to talk
about some water conservation.
778
00:36:26,317 --> 00:36:27,341
Now? I don't...
779
00:36:27,418 --> 00:36:30,512
Well, you know, your
uncles had the same problem.
780
00:36:31,022 --> 00:36:32,489
Adam was the worst.
781
00:36:32,890 --> 00:36:34,482
I think he was gonna
set some kind of record.
782
00:36:34,559 --> 00:36:36,026
I almost called Guinness.
783
00:36:36,093 --> 00:36:38,027
Can we just
not right now?
784
00:36:38,095 --> 00:36:40,154
When it comes
to testosterone,
785
00:36:40,231 --> 00:36:44,895
the Braverman men are blessed
with an abundance of riches, Son.
786
00:36:44,969 --> 00:36:46,630
Grandpa...
Pride...
787
00:36:46,904 --> 00:36:49,668
Pride and glory is what
you should be feeling, Son,
788
00:36:49,740 --> 00:36:53,039
at the bounty of
the Braverman libido.
789
00:36:54,445 --> 00:36:55,605
You know what
libido is?
790
00:36:55,746 --> 00:36:57,976
Oh, my God.
Please not right now.
791
00:36:58,182 --> 00:37:00,707
But even a Braverman, nay,
792
00:37:01,385 --> 00:37:03,649
especially a Braverman,
793
00:37:03,788 --> 00:37:06,689
needs to learn to
control these gifts.
794
00:37:06,791 --> 00:37:10,158
You know, what I'm talking
about here is moderation.
795
00:37:10,228 --> 00:37:11,490
I mean...
796
00:37:12,163 --> 00:37:14,961
For golly sakes, hell,
I remember what it was like.
797
00:37:15,032 --> 00:37:17,626
I was on R and R
in Bangkok, you know.
798
00:37:18,169 --> 00:37:19,796
And of course
I went a little nuts...
799
00:37:22,139 --> 00:37:23,629
Hey.
How'd it go?
800
00:37:23,708 --> 00:37:25,198
I rocked it.
Oh, good.
801
00:37:25,276 --> 00:37:26,641
I couldn't have
done it without you.
802
00:37:26,711 --> 00:37:28,440
Oh, I'm glad
you kicked ass.
803
00:37:28,512 --> 00:37:29,706
How'd everything
go here?
804
00:37:29,780 --> 00:37:30,906
He's still sleeping.
805
00:37:31,015 --> 00:37:32,482
Oh, okay.
806
00:37:37,154 --> 00:37:38,712
What happened
to the thumb?
807
00:37:39,457 --> 00:37:41,186
It was
a fishing accident.
808
00:37:41,259 --> 00:37:42,283
Oh.
809
00:38:02,580 --> 00:38:04,070
Am I still your favorite
man in the world?
810
00:38:04,148 --> 00:38:05,410
Mmm-hmm.
811
00:38:06,217 --> 00:38:08,617
I got to get this salad
done though, babe.
812
00:38:08,686 --> 00:38:10,210
I promised your mom.
813
00:38:10,388 --> 00:38:14,051
Really, 'cause I'm still
feeling kind of sad.
814
00:38:14,292 --> 00:38:16,055
Okay, stop.
815
00:38:16,761 --> 00:38:19,753
All right. Any news
on the Yo-Yo front?
816
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:24,659
I want to show you something. Come here.
817
00:38:32,576 --> 00:38:34,703
How long have they
been like that?
818
00:38:34,779 --> 00:38:36,269
About an hour.
819
00:38:49,293 --> 00:38:50,624
Hey.
820
00:38:54,398 --> 00:38:57,128
Don't worry. I'm not
going to say anything
821
00:38:57,835 --> 00:38:59,894
about anything.
822
00:39:01,472 --> 00:39:02,564
You promise?
823
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:04,232
Yeah. Hey.
824
00:39:10,081 --> 00:39:11,981
I'll take it out,
I'll take it out.
825
00:39:16,987 --> 00:39:17,976
Put it up.
826
00:39:30,968 --> 00:39:33,061
You said I shouldn't
talk to him, right?
827
00:39:40,277 --> 00:39:42,142
What can I say?
You're the man, Dad.
828
00:39:42,213 --> 00:39:43,874
'Uh-huh.
I'm sorry, what?
829
00:39:44,181 --> 00:39:46,376
Hey, Syd.
Sydney, look at this.
830
00:39:48,052 --> 00:39:49,542
Whoa, do it again,
Grandpa.
831
00:39:49,620 --> 00:39:50,712
Okay.
832
00:39:50,855 --> 00:39:51,913
Oh, hey, Sydney.
833
00:39:51,989 --> 00:39:53,217
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
834
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:57,280
Daddy.
835
00:40:57,721 --> 00:40:58,847
This is Steve.
836
00:41:10,401 --> 00:41:12,835
Mr. Braverman, it's really
good to meet you, sir.
837
00:41:19,743 --> 00:41:20,971
Whassup?
838
00:41:21,021 --> 00:41:25,571
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