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1
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,000
WOMAN: San Diego PD.
2
00:00:14,001 --> 00:00:16,419
Update on the Las
Hormigas Cartel activity.
3
00:00:16,420 --> 00:00:19,619
Intel suggests the shipment
could be as large as 18 tons,
4
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:22,119
but we just don't know
when it's gonna land.
5
00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:25,039
We have Car 27 on the
eastern perimeter,
6
00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:26,559
and I guess we'll hold 'em there.
7
00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:28,808
Mmm. Mmm.
8
00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:30,074
Mmm.
9
00:00:30,118 --> 00:00:31,667
Yeah.
10
00:00:32,523 --> 00:00:34,270
Oh, yeah.
11
00:00:34,907 --> 00:00:36,656
That's nice.
12
00:00:36,657 --> 00:00:38,156
Mmm. Mm-hmm.
13
00:00:38,157 --> 00:00:40,111
Are the noises necessary?
14
00:00:40,435 --> 00:00:41,594
Yeah, absolutely.
15
00:00:41,626 --> 00:00:43,595
Ooh, that is good.
16
00:00:44,572 --> 00:00:46,516
Whew! You want to give it a try?
17
00:00:46,541 --> 00:00:47,904
- Head massage?
- Pass.
18
00:00:48,371 --> 00:00:49,896
- You sure?
- Yeah.
19
00:00:50,291 --> 00:00:51,303
All right, well...
20
00:00:51,742 --> 00:00:53,266
Hey, do you mind doing me?
21
00:00:53,581 --> 00:00:55,290
[SIGHS] I'd rather not.
22
00:00:55,291 --> 00:00:56,750
Come on, it's really good when
23
00:00:56,751 --> 00:00:58,540
I do it myself, but it's so much better
24
00:00:58,541 --> 00:00:59,870
- when someone else does it.
- Really?
25
00:00:59,871 --> 00:01:01,259
Yeah. Oh, fine.
26
00:01:01,259 --> 00:01:02,261
Thank you.
27
00:01:04,048 --> 00:01:05,192
[SIGHS]
28
00:01:06,741 --> 00:01:08,535
Mmm, yeah.
29
00:01:09,588 --> 00:01:12,082
[MOANING]
30
00:01:12,853 --> 00:01:15,062
Oh. Don't you stop.
31
00:01:15,805 --> 00:01:18,203
Don't you dare stop. Oh, yeah.
32
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Come on. Faster.
33
00:01:20,386 --> 00:01:22,715
Okay, yes, yes, yes.
34
00:01:22,716 --> 00:01:24,555
Yeah. Yeah.
35
00:01:24,588 --> 00:01:26,158
- You must know what you're doing.
- I don't hear it.
36
00:01:26,183 --> 00:01:27,342
I'm just into this thing.
37
00:01:27,343 --> 00:01:29,142
Don't stop, please.
38
00:01:29,700 --> 00:01:31,182
Yeah. Come on, I'm almost there.
39
00:01:31,183 --> 00:01:33,012
- Almost.
- Almost where?
40
00:01:33,013 --> 00:01:34,842
Just to the... level of pleasure,
41
00:01:34,873 --> 00:01:36,930
- complete relaxation.
- I... No, no, no.
42
00:01:36,978 --> 00:01:39,013
- I'm not comfortable.
- Okay, fine.
43
00:01:41,052 --> 00:01:43,060
I really regret buying that for you now.
44
00:01:44,247 --> 00:01:46,426
FATIMA [OVER RADIO]: Car 27, please report.
45
00:01:47,013 --> 00:01:48,631
More authority. Louder.
46
00:01:48,973 --> 00:01:50,472
Car 27, please report.
47
00:01:50,793 --> 00:01:53,142
TOLBECK: Car 27. No activity. Who is this?
48
00:01:53,930 --> 00:01:55,424
It's Fatiga.
49
00:01:55,585 --> 00:01:57,382
Fatiga? Fatiga? Fatayga?
50
00:01:57,383 --> 00:01:58,829
Fatima. Fatima.
51
00:01:58,860 --> 00:02:00,142
It's her first day, guys.
52
00:02:00,194 --> 00:02:02,822
- Yeah?
- Uh... hello there from Car 27.
53
00:02:02,913 --> 00:02:04,412
This is Detective Cullen.
54
00:02:04,723 --> 00:02:06,646
Uh, and Detective Tolbeck.
55
00:02:06,956 --> 00:02:09,168
Uh, there's no activity currently, but, uh,
56
00:02:09,169 --> 00:02:10,828
it's nice to have you here.
57
00:02:10,829 --> 00:02:12,646
I hope you're settling in, uh, just fine.
58
00:02:12,701 --> 00:02:14,151
- No activity.
- Copy that.
59
00:02:15,879 --> 00:02:18,222
Uh, Car 27 to Dispatch.
Fatima, are you there?
60
00:02:18,270 --> 00:02:19,608
Yes, Car 27?
61
00:02:19,690 --> 00:02:21,939
Oh, God. What is that? [GASPS]
62
00:02:21,940 --> 00:02:23,229
No. He's got a gun.
63
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:24,439
- He's got a gun!
- Uh, Car 27?
64
00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:26,059
- Oh, my God! Don't shoot!
- Are you there?
65
00:02:26,060 --> 00:02:28,439
- Aah! Oh, God!
- Oh, he's shooting! Oh!
66
00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:30,359
Car 27? Uh, is everything oka...?
67
00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:31,439
Jesus Christ, put it away!
68
00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:32,440
- Car 27?
- Put it away!
69
00:02:32,441 --> 00:02:33,689
- Quickly!
- Janice, what do I do...?
70
00:02:33,690 --> 00:02:34,899
[SIREN WAILING]
71
00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,710
- [IMITATING SIREN]
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
72
00:02:37,288 --> 00:02:39,322
Car 27, please grow up.
73
00:02:40,277 --> 00:02:41,421
CULLEN: Apologies.
74
00:02:41,475 --> 00:02:43,295
Yeah, we're sorry. Uh, welcome to the team.
75
00:02:43,295 --> 00:02:44,248
Welcome aboard.
76
00:02:44,287 --> 00:02:47,121
And did you have a siren
on during a stakeout?
77
00:02:47,122 --> 00:02:48,531
TOLBECK: Um...
78
00:02:48,532 --> 00:02:51,995
no, I don't think we did?
79
00:02:52,831 --> 00:02:53,861
Idiots.
80
00:02:53,862 --> 00:02:55,121
Now I'm gonna have to write you up.
81
00:02:55,639 --> 00:02:57,071
Well, if you have to write it up,
82
00:02:57,072 --> 00:02:58,143
it was Tolbeck.
83
00:03:01,242 --> 00:03:04,451
["HAPPINESS, MISSOURI" BY EL VY PLAYING]
84
00:03:04,452 --> 00:03:08,411
? While away while someone
counts the minutes ?
85
00:03:08,412 --> 00:03:12,991
? Happiness, Missouri, I
got to get your mind off ?
86
00:03:12,992 --> 00:03:16,411
? By the way, I told
you we were in this ?
87
00:03:16,412 --> 00:03:20,571
? Happiness, Missouri, I got
to get your mind off it. ?
88
00:03:20,572 --> 00:03:22,572
?
89
00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:30,959
Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
90
00:03:37,548 --> 00:03:39,547
JANICE: Look, sometimes
you got to roll
91
00:03:39,548 --> 00:03:40,787
with that kind of stuff.
92
00:03:40,834 --> 00:03:44,535
89% of new dispatch recruits
quit after the first month.
93
00:03:44,840 --> 00:03:45,876
Really?
94
00:03:45,877 --> 00:03:47,027
That seems...
95
00:03:47,081 --> 00:03:49,035
- aggressively high.
- Yeah, well, I don't have the data
96
00:03:49,067 --> 00:03:51,645
to back it up, but I've
been here long enough
97
00:03:51,769 --> 00:03:53,268
to feel that's just about right.
98
00:03:53,313 --> 00:03:55,810
So can you handle this job or not?
99
00:03:55,931 --> 00:03:56,995
I don't know.
100
00:03:57,353 --> 00:03:59,050
I mean... maybe.
101
00:03:59,287 --> 00:04:01,812
I'm still figuring it
out. I haven't decided yet.
102
00:04:01,813 --> 00:04:03,525
- I'm sorry?
- I mean...
103
00:04:03,737 --> 00:04:07,576
I'm under no obligation to
settle on a career right now.
104
00:04:07,662 --> 00:04:09,202
- Really?
- Yeah.
105
00:04:09,227 --> 00:04:11,802
I'm still open to so many things.
106
00:04:11,879 --> 00:04:15,097
I mean, maybe I'll open a-a scuba shop,
107
00:04:15,122 --> 00:04:17,145
or maybe I'll be a rap producer.
108
00:04:17,145 --> 00:04:19,184
I've always been interested in buying
109
00:04:19,239 --> 00:04:21,474
and-and flipping things,
110
00:04:21,527 --> 00:04:23,326
- probably juice bars, you know?
- Mm-hmm.
111
00:04:23,694 --> 00:04:25,443
I mean, pretty much, you just add
112
00:04:25,444 --> 00:04:27,103
turmeric to all the drinks,
113
00:04:27,104 --> 00:04:28,475
and then get rid of it, flip it.
114
00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:29,535
Bing bong.
115
00:04:31,933 --> 00:04:33,361
What's that? "Bing bong"?
116
00:04:33,415 --> 00:04:34,829
Oh, bing bong. That's something
117
00:04:34,874 --> 00:04:37,163
Tabitha and I started...
you know, when we had enough
118
00:04:37,165 --> 00:04:39,874
of a certain conversation,
we'd say, "Bing bong."
119
00:04:39,875 --> 00:04:41,914
It's remarkably effective shorthand.
120
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:44,059
And I was thinking maybe that's
something you should adopt.
121
00:04:44,838 --> 00:04:46,066
Okay, um...
122
00:04:46,295 --> 00:04:48,004
so when do I... do I...
123
00:04:48,005 --> 00:04:48,901
- Is it, like...
- Bing bong.
124
00:04:52,323 --> 00:04:54,845
_
125
00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:56,593
_
126
00:04:56,617 --> 00:05:00,031
_
127
00:05:00,055 --> 00:05:01,148
_
128
00:05:01,625 --> 00:05:02,803
What is that?
129
00:05:03,757 --> 00:05:05,022
Huh? Oh.
130
00:05:05,238 --> 00:05:07,254
I just got this. Cool, right?
131
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,215
This is for, like, tough guys, you know?
132
00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:11,750
You pull this out...
boom, don't fuck with me.
133
00:05:11,841 --> 00:05:13,841
You know, I'm just checking
a text, but, like...
134
00:05:14,303 --> 00:05:15,341
don't fuck with me.
135
00:05:15,341 --> 00:05:17,750
And this trigger is hooked up
136
00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:19,840
to the phone itself,
'cause it's all plugged in,
137
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,880
- so if, when I answer it...
- [CLICK]
138
00:05:21,881 --> 00:05:22,841
Hello.
139
00:05:23,202 --> 00:05:24,210
That's cool.
140
00:05:24,211 --> 00:05:25,750
Right? And then when I'm done...
141
00:05:25,751 --> 00:05:27,250
- All right, I'll talk to you later.
- [CLICK]
142
00:05:27,636 --> 00:05:28,925
- Also cool.
- That is
143
00:05:28,926 --> 00:05:30,292
the best feature, but it looks...
144
00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:32,835
- fucking ridiculous.
- I thought you
145
00:05:32,836 --> 00:05:34,979
were gonna think this was so fucking cool.
146
00:05:35,417 --> 00:05:37,044
So you bought that
147
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:39,519
- to try and, like, impress me?
- No,
148
00:05:39,519 --> 00:05:41,638
I bought it 'cause I liked
it, but I did think to myself,
149
00:05:41,638 --> 00:05:43,767
"Angus is gonna love this.
Should I get him one?"
150
00:05:44,089 --> 00:05:45,677
And now I guess I'm glad I didn't.
151
00:05:46,823 --> 00:05:50,133
How fucking long are we
supposed to wait here?
152
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:53,527
I don't get it. I-I don't understand.
153
00:05:53,548 --> 00:05:55,786
Th-There's a hotel ten
minutes away, The Castaway,
154
00:05:55,811 --> 00:05:57,376
they've got a 24-hour breakfast buffet.
155
00:05:57,401 --> 00:05:58,862
We could be eating right now.
156
00:05:59,551 --> 00:06:02,830
Now, we're sitting in
this fucking smelly... box.
157
00:06:04,660 --> 00:06:06,999
We'll wait as long as he wants us to wait.
158
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,659
Okay, that's the job.
159
00:06:08,660 --> 00:06:10,898
We're being paid to wait.
160
00:06:12,125 --> 00:06:14,033
- Yeah, I understand that.
- When you're running your own cartel...
161
00:06:14,810 --> 00:06:17,202
you can put us all up in a hotel
162
00:06:17,227 --> 00:06:18,676
with 24-hour room service.
163
00:06:18,678 --> 00:06:20,177
Th-That's exactly what I would do.
164
00:06:20,178 --> 00:06:22,017
- [CLOWN HORN RINGTONE PLAYS]
- Oh. Here we go.
165
00:06:22,018 --> 00:06:23,541
[CHUCKLES]: Oh-ho-ho.
166
00:06:23,832 --> 00:06:25,211
- Ah.
- What's it say?
167
00:06:25,478 --> 00:06:26,385
Hang on.
168
00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:28,676
- Oh, fuck.
- What?
169
00:06:30,058 --> 00:06:31,333
[SIGHS]
170
00:06:31,888 --> 00:06:34,417
- Marco, what?!
- Hang on a second!
171
00:06:37,728 --> 00:06:39,137
[GROANS]
172
00:06:39,138 --> 00:06:40,768
- [SETS PHONE DOWN]
- Speak.
173
00:06:42,098 --> 00:06:43,300
My mom's cat got out.
174
00:06:43,850 --> 00:06:45,389
Are you fucking kidding me?
175
00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:47,599
That's your reaction to that news?
176
00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:49,769
And why are... why is your mom texting you
177
00:06:49,770 --> 00:06:51,099
about her fucking cat right now?
178
00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:52,348
Doesn't she know you're working?
179
00:06:52,348 --> 00:06:54,249
It's an emergency, Angus!
180
00:06:54,848 --> 00:06:57,751
It's an indoor cat, and it's out!
181
00:06:57,994 --> 00:06:59,413
Do... do you not get that?
182
00:06:59,437 --> 00:07:00,856
It's my mom's cat!
183
00:07:01,187 --> 00:07:03,726
- Is out! Of the house!
- I think we have
184
00:07:03,727 --> 00:07:05,976
different definitions of emergencies.
185
00:07:05,977 --> 00:07:08,687
Yeah. I guess so, 'cause
this is one.
186
00:07:15,856 --> 00:07:17,945
Oh, man. I need a haircut.
187
00:07:18,331 --> 00:07:19,641
Can you believe this?
188
00:07:20,026 --> 00:07:22,025
- Can I believe it?
- Mm-hmm.
189
00:07:22,026 --> 00:07:23,734
No, I can't. That's unbelievable.
190
00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:25,707
[SIGHS]: Oh, man.
191
00:07:26,066 --> 00:07:28,369
You know, I got this haircut
when we started this stakeout.
192
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,759
- Did you?
- Yeah. Yeah.
193
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:33,452
The night we started.
'Cause I wanted to look good.
194
00:07:33,499 --> 00:07:36,208
You were talking about how we're
gonna, you know, be in these,
195
00:07:36,208 --> 00:07:38,707
like, news photos behind the big drug bust,
196
00:07:38,707 --> 00:07:40,679
- we're gonna be big heroes.
- You're saying
197
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:41,843
your hair is long now?
198
00:07:41,843 --> 00:07:44,096
- Yeah. This is long.
- Uh... that's long?
199
00:07:44,223 --> 00:07:45,529
It's a baby Afro.
200
00:07:45,893 --> 00:07:47,892
Yeah. I mean... I don't
think I've ever noticed
201
00:07:47,893 --> 00:07:50,381
your hair changed the whole
time we've been together.
202
00:07:50,723 --> 00:07:53,832
In 11 years, you've never
noticed my hair's been cut,
203
00:07:53,895 --> 00:07:56,102
- short, long...
- Did you say 11 years?
204
00:07:56,387 --> 00:07:58,642
- Yeah.
- We have not been together for 11 years.
205
00:07:58,643 --> 00:08:01,182
- We have been together 11 years.
- No.
206
00:08:01,683 --> 00:08:04,052
Last year was our tenth year together.
207
00:08:04,053 --> 00:08:05,888
I got you the watch on
our tenth anniversary.
208
00:08:06,869 --> 00:08:08,451
- This watch?
- Yes.
209
00:08:08,619 --> 00:08:10,198
Is that why you gave this to me?
210
00:08:10,198 --> 00:08:11,777
Yes. It was for our tenth anniversary.
211
00:08:11,778 --> 00:08:13,867
I even got an inscription on the back.
212
00:08:14,058 --> 00:08:16,177
- Are you serious?
- Yeah. You never read it?
213
00:08:16,404 --> 00:08:18,352
- No.
- It's been a year.
214
00:08:19,283 --> 00:08:21,322
"To the best partner
I could ever wish for."
215
00:08:21,323 --> 00:08:22,347
There you go.
216
00:08:22,533 --> 00:08:23,622
That's really nice.
217
00:08:23,623 --> 00:08:24,748
Yeah, you're welcome.
218
00:08:24,873 --> 00:08:26,372
That makes more sense.
219
00:08:26,373 --> 00:08:27,766
I really didn't know
why you gave that to me.
220
00:08:29,195 --> 00:08:31,412
MARCO: I'm dressed like an adult, Angus.
221
00:08:31,413 --> 00:08:33,593
I'm dressed like an
adult who's doing a job.
222
00:08:33,593 --> 00:08:35,052
You're dressed like a child.
223
00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:38,250
The other day I woke up, and
you were over there pissing,
224
00:08:38,275 --> 00:08:39,959
and I looked and I thought
there was a kid over there.
225
00:08:39,959 --> 00:08:42,918
Honest to God, I thought a
kid had gotten in the box.
226
00:08:42,919 --> 00:08:44,758
I know exactly what this is about.
227
00:08:44,759 --> 00:08:46,878
You've been doing this
for the last three years,
228
00:08:46,879 --> 00:08:48,418
just trying to father me,
229
00:08:48,419 --> 00:08:52,012
mold me into becoming a version of you.
230
00:08:52,129 --> 00:08:55,048
Just like you try to do
this tough guy thing whenever
231
00:08:55,049 --> 00:08:57,168
- we're taking care of something.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
232
00:08:57,169 --> 00:08:59,268
Your crazy guy thing is
what we should be doing?
233
00:08:59,370 --> 00:09:01,667
- You think your crazy guy routine...
- It's unpredictable.
234
00:09:01,925 --> 00:09:04,925
It's predictably unpredictable, I'm afraid.
235
00:09:06,646 --> 00:09:08,565
Oh. Give me one second.
236
00:09:08,566 --> 00:09:09,645
Yeah, sure.
237
00:09:14,611 --> 00:09:17,095
Psycho eyes, head tilt.
238
00:09:17,776 --> 00:09:19,146
Grit the teeth.
239
00:09:21,396 --> 00:09:23,355
Give me the combination
to the code, motherfucker.
240
00:09:23,489 --> 00:09:27,488
Hmm? Give me the combination to the code.
241
00:09:28,020 --> 00:09:29,504
- Blink your eyes.
- That's not bad.
242
00:09:29,529 --> 00:09:31,028
- That's good.
- Blink your eyes, motherfucker.
243
00:09:31,053 --> 00:09:32,520
- Blink your eyes!
- Okay. [LAUGHS]
244
00:09:32,521 --> 00:09:34,600
- That's good. That's good.
- All right, so...
245
00:09:34,654 --> 00:09:36,404
- It's not bad. I just...
- Believe me,
246
00:09:36,429 --> 00:09:37,998
I get it. I get it.
247
00:09:37,999 --> 00:09:40,078
We all, when we're younger, do crazy guy
248
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,393
'cause crazy guy's, frankly, easier.
249
00:09:42,709 --> 00:09:44,748
- Right?
- No, it's not. It's not easier.
250
00:09:44,749 --> 00:09:46,557
Oh, please. You don't
think I could do crazy guy?
251
00:09:46,582 --> 00:09:48,579
- Show me.
- Okay, great. What did you...? You said...
252
00:09:48,579 --> 00:09:50,118
- psycho peepers?
- You know what? Hey.
253
00:09:50,119 --> 00:09:51,855
- Psycho peepers? Ready? Ready?
- Yeah.
254
00:09:51,956 --> 00:09:53,526
- Psycho eyes.
- Okay.
255
00:09:53,683 --> 00:09:55,578
Sure. Oh, oh, and the neck, okay.
256
00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:56,908
- Cock the head, grit the teeth.
- Yeah, sideways look.
257
00:09:56,909 --> 00:09:58,578
I don't know that I'll do the teeth thing.
258
00:09:58,579 --> 00:09:59,708
You don't know if I'm
fucking looking at you.
259
00:09:59,709 --> 00:10:01,719
- Sure, sure.
- How about that?
260
00:10:04,114 --> 00:10:05,810
- [SNIFFLING]
- I mean, that's just, like...
261
00:10:06,459 --> 00:10:07,795
deranged.
262
00:10:07,796 --> 00:10:09,807
Hey, man. Hey.
263
00:10:10,723 --> 00:10:12,563
What's the combination to the safe?
264
00:10:12,564 --> 00:10:15,473
What's the com...? [LAUGHING]
265
00:10:15,473 --> 00:10:18,193
What's the combination to the safe?
266
00:10:18,473 --> 00:10:20,182
See? Crazy.
267
00:10:20,183 --> 00:10:21,932
Unpredictable. They don't know.
268
00:10:21,933 --> 00:10:24,838
The person doesn't want
to help the crazy person.
269
00:10:25,183 --> 00:10:28,674
Right? Ask nice, and this is the threat.
270
00:10:28,744 --> 00:10:32,113
You don't have to both
have this and crazy eyes.
271
00:10:32,114 --> 00:10:34,060
Now, the person doesn't know what to do.
272
00:10:34,284 --> 00:10:35,653
- The person is now...
- Exactly.
273
00:10:35,654 --> 00:10:37,493
- So they comply.
- No, they don't.
274
00:10:37,494 --> 00:10:39,524
They shit their pants and freak out.
275
00:10:39,538 --> 00:10:41,459
I used to do what you do, but for me, now,
276
00:10:41,484 --> 00:10:42,693
I realize, I get a lot more done...
277
00:10:42,694 --> 00:10:44,190
- You didn't do what I did.
- Shut up.
278
00:10:46,984 --> 00:10:48,815
What's the combination to the safe?
279
00:10:49,614 --> 00:10:51,483
Do you know the combination to the safe?
280
00:10:51,675 --> 00:10:53,851
- I don't want to kill you, man.
- Liam Neeson?
281
00:10:54,389 --> 00:10:55,888
Am I Liam Neeson?
282
00:10:56,288 --> 00:10:57,657
I mean, I'm just trying
283
00:10:57,688 --> 00:10:59,023
to figure out who you're channeling.
284
00:10:59,048 --> 00:11:01,057
- Here.
- No, I'm doing me. I don't do Liam Nee...
285
00:11:01,058 --> 00:11:02,557
- He's foreign.
- You're not doing you, man.
286
00:11:02,558 --> 00:11:04,347
- That's...
- I'm not even doing an accent.
287
00:11:04,348 --> 00:11:06,597
Okay, okay, okay, just-just
shut the fuck up for one second.
288
00:11:06,598 --> 00:11:08,094
All right, fine. Fine!
289
00:11:10,270 --> 00:11:11,447
I can't even...
290
00:11:11,447 --> 00:11:13,326
- hear myself think.
- [CLOWN HORN RINGTONE PLAYS]
291
00:11:13,327 --> 00:11:15,697
Fuck. My mom is freaking out.
292
00:11:16,168 --> 00:11:17,196
Aw.
293
00:11:18,239 --> 00:11:20,406
She's using emojis now?
294
00:11:20,802 --> 00:11:22,196
But she's using the water symbol,
295
00:11:22,197 --> 00:11:24,116
which she thinks means crying,
296
00:11:24,117 --> 00:11:27,617
but it just seems like my mom's
just telling me how wet she is.
297
00:11:36,511 --> 00:11:37,520
JANICE: No.
298
00:11:37,582 --> 00:11:40,011
Put my laptop down and go to sleep.
299
00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,443
We'll talk about it in
the morning. Good-bye.
300
00:11:43,932 --> 00:11:45,070
[SIGHS]
301
00:11:45,095 --> 00:11:46,506
- Sorry, I...
- Yeah.
302
00:11:46,619 --> 00:11:48,823
...hate to talk about
personal matters at work.
303
00:11:49,488 --> 00:11:51,050
That's okay. It's fine.
304
00:11:51,081 --> 00:11:52,960
It's just that Mason's at home alone,
305
00:11:52,961 --> 00:11:54,683
he's not used to it,
and he's become a terror.
306
00:11:55,132 --> 00:11:56,839
Boys will be boys.
307
00:11:57,212 --> 00:12:00,579
Especially boys with a...
laptop, if you know what I mean.
308
00:12:00,798 --> 00:12:03,809
- Well... I think...
- I'll tell you what's going on.
309
00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:05,711
- Yeah, I think you're...
- I'll tell you what's going on.
310
00:12:05,712 --> 00:12:06,840
Yeah.
311
00:12:06,871 --> 00:12:09,183
He's 15, he's home alone,
he's got my laptop...
312
00:12:09,183 --> 00:12:11,012
- Yeah.
- ...and he's whacking off, okay?
313
00:12:11,051 --> 00:12:12,902
- Yeah.
- He's whacking off.
314
00:12:12,927 --> 00:12:15,426
And I won't even tell you
what's going on in the bathroom.
315
00:12:15,427 --> 00:12:18,806
It looks like a CSI frat house in there.
316
00:12:18,807 --> 00:12:20,426
You put one of those
black lights all over it,
317
00:12:20,427 --> 00:12:22,806
- it'd be everywhere. Everywhere.
- Yeah.
318
00:12:22,807 --> 00:12:24,636
It's probably all over me
right now. It's probably on you
319
00:12:24,637 --> 00:12:26,756
when I came in and brushed against you.
320
00:12:26,781 --> 00:12:28,610
It'd be on your back,
on the back of your neck,
321
00:12:28,612 --> 00:12:30,722
- around your mouth, on your coffee cup...
- Wait.
322
00:12:30,747 --> 00:12:32,824
- Why would it...?
- ...on the pencil that you put in your mouth.
323
00:12:32,903 --> 00:12:34,426
You'd be completely white.
324
00:12:34,465 --> 00:12:35,256
Why would it be here?
325
00:12:35,281 --> 00:12:36,467
You'd look like Casper
the Friendly Ghost.
326
00:12:36,492 --> 00:12:38,136
- And you know what? I get it.
- Mm-hmm.
327
00:12:38,137 --> 00:12:40,216
It's natural. Okay, I'm not here to judge.
328
00:12:40,217 --> 00:12:42,466
But what bothers me is the fact
329
00:12:42,467 --> 00:12:44,595
that he's not using his imagination.
330
00:12:44,595 --> 00:12:47,214
- Yeah.
- Right? And your brain is a muscle, all right?
331
00:12:47,215 --> 00:12:49,021
- Right.
- And you have to exercise that muscle.
332
00:12:49,129 --> 00:12:50,362
You know, I'd like it
333
00:12:50,363 --> 00:12:52,072
if one day, maybe I'd brought him in here,
334
00:12:52,419 --> 00:12:54,901
and he'd take one look at your... ears,
335
00:12:55,163 --> 00:12:57,742
and he'd get excited by it,
and that would turn him on.
336
00:12:57,743 --> 00:12:59,202
He'd go over there and whack off about it.
337
00:12:59,203 --> 00:13:01,992
You know, just a little
bit of your-your-your wrist,
338
00:13:01,993 --> 00:13:04,997
your pinky, anything, just to arouse him
339
00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:08,195
without the goddamn screen,
without the goddamn... my screen.
340
00:13:08,402 --> 00:13:10,650
That's a good point. I mean, a lot of...
341
00:13:10,688 --> 00:13:13,430
A lot of people now think
that the natural ending
342
00:13:13,489 --> 00:13:16,047
to lovemaking is, like, when...
343
00:13:16,649 --> 00:13:19,148
he finishes on... on a female's face,
344
00:13:19,149 --> 00:13:21,688
and, like... or-or, like, on her breasts.
345
00:13:21,689 --> 00:13:24,228
[SCOFFS] I'm talking about the innocence
346
00:13:24,493 --> 00:13:26,106
of a 15-year-old boy,
347
00:13:26,334 --> 00:13:27,675
and you're talking about...
348
00:13:28,578 --> 00:13:31,316
hard-core pornography, okay?
349
00:13:31,356 --> 00:13:34,105
And this isn't the place for
that kind of talk, all right?
350
00:13:34,278 --> 00:13:35,348
Bing bong.
351
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:40,696
?
352
00:13:46,816 --> 00:13:48,266
God, this is boring.
353
00:13:48,266 --> 00:13:49,482
Mm.
354
00:13:49,856 --> 00:13:52,645
I mean... why do they keep
us in the dark like this?
355
00:13:52,646 --> 00:13:54,105
I mean, they could... they could trust us
356
00:13:54,106 --> 00:13:56,601
with some scrap of information, you know?
357
00:13:56,936 --> 00:13:58,435
If the Las Hormigas
Cartel is bringing in...
358
00:13:58,490 --> 00:14:00,491
Whoa, whoa. Spoiler alert.
359
00:14:00,788 --> 00:14:03,262
I didn't know the Las Hormigas
Cartel was part of this.
360
00:14:03,294 --> 00:14:04,647
Geez, thanks a lot.
361
00:14:04,896 --> 00:14:07,272
- You read the briefing?
- I skimmed it.
362
00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:10,675
Why do I want to read the novel
when I'm gonna be in the movie?
363
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:12,714
Yeah, but if the Las
Hormigas Cartel is bringing
364
00:14:12,715 --> 00:14:14,294
- in a drug shipment, we should...
- ? La-la, la-la, la-la-la ?
365
00:14:14,295 --> 00:14:16,491
? I don't want to hear
this, I don't want to hear. ?
366
00:14:16,545 --> 00:14:18,494
[OVER RADIO]: This is Greg from
port security. Do you read me?
367
00:14:19,896 --> 00:14:21,879
Yes, Greg from port security.
368
00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:23,907
I remember you from five minutes ago.
369
00:14:23,961 --> 00:14:25,028
What's up?
370
00:14:25,055 --> 00:14:27,421
Okay, well, this is probably
out of my jurisdiction.
371
00:14:27,489 --> 00:14:28,738
Uh, you don't have a jurisdiction.
372
00:14:28,739 --> 00:14:30,278
Well, uh, call it
373
00:14:30,279 --> 00:14:31,508
professional courtesy then.
374
00:14:31,508 --> 00:14:34,217
Uh, as per our previous
discussion regarding unusual
375
00:14:34,217 --> 00:14:37,935
or suspicious activity, I
wanted to report the formation
376
00:14:37,967 --> 00:14:41,076
of a dark cloud over the eastern perimeter.
377
00:14:41,250 --> 00:14:42,749
No, that doesn't qualify,
378
00:14:42,750 --> 00:14:44,869
and I'm not sure why you think it would.
379
00:14:44,870 --> 00:14:46,816
[CHUCKLING]: Yeah, well,
it's probably nothing.
380
00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:49,041
But, um...
381
00:14:49,250 --> 00:14:53,159
dark cloud is usually a
classic metaphor for foreboding,
382
00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:56,093
and I thought that might be
pertinent to the investigation.
383
00:14:56,127 --> 00:14:57,199
Uh, no, thanks.
384
00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:58,489
All right, as colleagues, then,
385
00:14:58,490 --> 00:15:00,659
I thought just, perhaps,
we could share intel.
386
00:15:00,660 --> 00:15:04,079
I will appraise you of
the activity in my sector,
387
00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:07,409
and you guys, quid pro quo,
let me in on the investigation.
388
00:15:07,447 --> 00:15:09,009
I already said no, Greg.
389
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:11,323
Well, I already told you
about the, uh, dark clouds,
390
00:15:11,324 --> 00:15:13,413
so it's a little late for that.
391
00:15:13,414 --> 00:15:15,719
How about the "quo" part
of the "quid pro quo"?
392
00:15:17,044 --> 00:15:18,417
Okay, I'll just let
393
00:15:18,456 --> 00:15:21,911
you know that I am qualified
to handle sensitive information.
394
00:15:21,950 --> 00:15:24,489
I passed the TSA online
course six months ago.
395
00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:26,159
I was in the top percentile.
396
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:27,409
[STATIC]
397
00:15:27,410 --> 00:15:28,989
Check. Are you...? Can you hear me?
398
00:15:28,990 --> 00:15:30,279
[STATIC]
399
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:31,949
You had to give this guy
a fucking walkie-talkie,
400
00:15:31,950 --> 00:15:33,199
- didn't you?
- I'm sorry.
401
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:34,483
[STATIC]
402
00:15:34,483 --> 00:15:36,562
Base to car, base to car.
403
00:15:36,563 --> 00:15:38,773
[STATIC]
404
00:15:43,169 --> 00:15:44,968
MARCO: I'm trying to
get high-speed Internet
405
00:15:44,969 --> 00:15:46,110
hooked up at my house.
406
00:15:46,110 --> 00:15:47,569
Only, after about an hour,
the guy's not there yet.
407
00:15:47,570 --> 00:15:49,123
I start getting antsy, so...
408
00:15:49,530 --> 00:15:51,529
figure I'll start cleaning out the garage.
409
00:15:51,530 --> 00:15:53,359
We've got all these, like, rolls of carpet.
410
00:15:53,698 --> 00:15:56,029
It's like this heavy, beautiful,
411
00:15:56,030 --> 00:15:59,089
tapered, dark shag carpeting.
412
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:01,239
Used to be all over the house,
413
00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:03,529
but, like, it has this gold
fleck that, like, catches
414
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:04,979
the light in a way that is...
415
00:16:04,980 --> 00:16:06,739
It's dynamite, honestly.
416
00:16:06,740 --> 00:16:09,694
And about... I don't know...
what, a year and a half ago,
417
00:16:09,980 --> 00:16:11,609
I had that, uh, crack in the garage.
418
00:16:11,610 --> 00:16:14,109
- Yeah, I remember.
- Yeah, right? I told you all about that.
419
00:16:14,110 --> 00:16:15,899
- Yeah, I remember.
- The gutter came loose,
420
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:17,819
and so water came in the southern wall.
421
00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,859
- So, guess what.
- What?
422
00:16:19,860 --> 00:16:23,362
Mold. So, got rid of all of that.
423
00:16:23,395 --> 00:16:25,587
It's noon at this point. Is the guy there?
424
00:16:25,966 --> 00:16:27,286
- No.
- Has the guy come?
425
00:16:27,330 --> 00:16:28,489
- No.
- Has the guy called?
426
00:16:28,513 --> 00:16:29,474
No.
427
00:16:29,475 --> 00:16:31,724
You're not wrong. Cactus Ken, meanwhile,
428
00:16:31,725 --> 00:16:33,514
is blowing me up 'cause I'm supposed
429
00:16:33,515 --> 00:16:35,474
to give him some grappling
hooks for a job he's doing,
430
00:16:35,475 --> 00:16:36,934
but I tell him, "Listen, dude, I'm waiting
431
00:16:36,935 --> 00:16:38,594
"for high-speed Internet
guy to come and hook it up.
432
00:16:38,595 --> 00:16:40,094
"I can't come to you
433
00:16:40,095 --> 00:16:42,391
until he comes to me and
finishes up." Finally,
434
00:16:42,391 --> 00:16:44,270
I feel bad, I'm like,
"Fine, I'll come over there.
435
00:16:44,271 --> 00:16:45,761
I'll drop off the grappling hooks."
436
00:16:46,101 --> 00:16:47,890
I leave a note for the guy.
437
00:16:48,449 --> 00:16:49,480
Guess what.
438
00:16:50,061 --> 00:16:52,601
I cannot find my car keys.
439
00:16:53,027 --> 00:16:54,726
I go up to the bathroom. I don't
know. Maybe I put 'em there.
440
00:16:54,727 --> 00:16:56,686
Somehow, a snake had gotten
in through the window,
441
00:16:56,687 --> 00:16:58,686
so I kill the snake, I
look around the bathroom.
442
00:16:58,780 --> 00:17:01,009
No keys in the bathroom.
I go to the bedroom.
443
00:17:01,390 --> 00:17:03,266
I'm looking through, like, all the pockets
444
00:17:03,267 --> 00:17:05,526
of all the clothes that I wore yesterday,
445
00:17:05,527 --> 00:17:07,936
- all the clothes I wore last...
- [GROANS]
446
00:17:07,937 --> 00:17:10,391
- Oh, my God. I can't...
- What?
447
00:17:11,743 --> 00:17:13,093
You are
448
00:17:13,094 --> 00:17:15,301
the master of the boring story.
449
00:17:16,281 --> 00:17:17,564
What does that mean?
450
00:17:17,589 --> 00:17:20,422
You spend all this time
talking about fucking carpet,
451
00:17:20,468 --> 00:17:22,325
and then you just skipped right over
452
00:17:22,357 --> 00:17:24,163
all of the interesting parts.
453
00:17:25,130 --> 00:17:26,936
[SCOFFS] Wow. Okay, fine.
454
00:17:26,937 --> 00:17:29,226
I mean, what about... Y-You
said you killed a snake, right?
455
00:17:29,227 --> 00:17:32,326
- Yeah.
- You just passed right by that.
456
00:17:32,326 --> 00:17:34,325
How did you kill the snake?
What kind of snake was it?
457
00:17:34,326 --> 00:17:36,115
Did you almost get bit?
I mean, there-there...
458
00:17:36,116 --> 00:17:37,495
- I have a lot of...
- No, I didn't get bit.
459
00:17:37,496 --> 00:17:39,495
It's a fucking snake.
Snake came in the window,
460
00:17:39,496 --> 00:17:42,123
rattlesnake, grabbed it by the tail.
461
00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:43,725
Do you not know how to kill a snake?
462
00:17:43,726 --> 00:17:46,174
You swing it around,
you crack it like a whip,
463
00:17:46,174 --> 00:17:48,333
and then it breaks its
spine and all the guts
464
00:17:48,335 --> 00:17:50,294
and everything else comes
shooting out the mouth.
465
00:17:50,295 --> 00:17:53,174
See? That is absolutely fascinating.
466
00:17:53,175 --> 00:17:55,294
- And I don't really...
- But that's not interesting to me.
467
00:17:55,295 --> 00:17:57,544
I grew up in the desert. I
probably killed a million snakes.
468
00:17:57,545 --> 00:17:59,544
What's interesting to me is this carpet,
469
00:17:59,545 --> 00:18:01,134
which I have literally
never seen in my life.
470
00:18:01,135 --> 00:18:03,504
I know the carpet's really
interesting to you. I know.
471
00:18:03,505 --> 00:18:04,924
- But it had this fleck, right?
- I know about the fleck, man.
472
00:18:04,925 --> 00:18:06,044
Okay.
473
00:18:06,045 --> 00:18:07,754
- What about Cactus Ken?
- Cactus Ken
474
00:18:07,755 --> 00:18:10,134
is only in there because I
owed him the grappling hooks.
475
00:18:10,135 --> 00:18:11,594
Yeah, what are you using
the grappling hooks for?
476
00:18:11,595 --> 00:18:13,745
He was breaking some guy out of a prison.
477
00:18:14,607 --> 00:18:15,782
[CHUCKLES]
478
00:18:16,135 --> 00:18:18,214
- You don't see...
- But I-I wasn't part of that.
479
00:18:18,215 --> 00:18:19,924
That's not even my story to tell.
480
00:18:19,925 --> 00:18:22,334
I'm telling you my story,
Angus, that's Ken's story.
481
00:18:22,335 --> 00:18:25,214
Well, maybe we should get Ken
over here to tell his story,
482
00:18:25,215 --> 00:18:27,004
because it sounds more interesting than...
483
00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:29,964
[SCOFFS] Okay, I'm gonna give
you a taste of this story, okay?
484
00:18:30,730 --> 00:18:32,552
They take the grappling hooks
485
00:18:32,552 --> 00:18:33,683
and they hook 'em up to the windows.
486
00:18:33,683 --> 00:18:36,222
They pull the iron off. Now,
what's interesting about it
487
00:18:36,223 --> 00:18:40,222
- is the iron bars fall off in such a way
- [GROANS]
488
00:18:40,223 --> 00:18:42,472
that they start skidding across the ground.
489
00:18:42,473 --> 00:18:44,302
- Did they make it?
- Who?
490
00:18:44,303 --> 00:18:46,012
Did they get him out of prison?
491
00:18:46,013 --> 00:18:48,222
Come on. You really are
just results-oriented, huh?
492
00:18:48,223 --> 00:18:49,802
Nobody got out. Cactus Ken died
493
00:18:49,803 --> 00:18:52,138
in a fire. Crocodile
got killed by the truck.
494
00:18:53,013 --> 00:18:55,012
- Happy? Great.
- All right. Yeah, yeah. I am happy.
495
00:18:55,013 --> 00:18:57,221
- Great story, everybody. Great story.
- I'm happy.
496
00:19:01,677 --> 00:19:04,278
Car 27, please come in, Car 27.
497
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,019
- CULLEN: This is Car 27. Go ahead.
- Yeah, just thought
498
00:19:06,020 --> 00:19:09,091
you should know that Detective
Frizell passed away today.
499
00:19:09,176 --> 00:19:10,521
Oh, no. What happened?
500
00:19:10,546 --> 00:19:11,913
He was on the toilet.
501
00:19:11,948 --> 00:19:14,447
Yeah, I guess the strain,
his heart gave away.
502
00:19:14,448 --> 00:19:15,777
It's more common than you think.
503
00:19:15,778 --> 00:19:17,567
15,000 people a year
504
00:19:17,568 --> 00:19:19,447
in the United States die that way.
505
00:19:19,448 --> 00:19:20,987
Okay. Thanks for that, Janice. Out.
506
00:19:20,988 --> 00:19:22,025
Copy that.
507
00:19:22,238 --> 00:19:23,527
Oh, man.
508
00:19:23,528 --> 00:19:24,984
Poor old Frizell.
509
00:19:27,138 --> 00:19:28,320
You okay?
510
00:19:29,608 --> 00:19:31,357
[SIGHS] No.
511
00:19:31,358 --> 00:19:33,710
Oh, my God. I didn't know
you and Frizell were close.
512
00:19:34,875 --> 00:19:36,277
I just remember, one day,
513
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:38,067
after the morning briefing...
514
00:19:38,979 --> 00:19:41,277
You know how I like to
go to the bathroom, uh,
515
00:19:41,278 --> 00:19:43,277
usually do my business at 10:15...
516
00:19:43,278 --> 00:19:45,107
To 10:45. Yeah, I heard that story.
517
00:19:45,108 --> 00:19:48,542
Do you still do that thing
where you bring other shoes
518
00:19:48,644 --> 00:19:50,857
and you put them on to go to the bathroom
519
00:19:50,858 --> 00:19:52,197
so nobody knows it's
you? You still do that?
520
00:19:52,198 --> 00:19:53,277
Yeah. Everybody does that.
521
00:19:53,278 --> 00:19:55,277
Nah. Mm, okay. Go on.
522
00:19:55,278 --> 00:19:57,277
So, anyways, um, I go into the bathroom,
523
00:19:57,278 --> 00:20:00,120
and I go all the way down to
my favorite stall, you know?
524
00:20:00,145 --> 00:20:01,067
Right.
525
00:20:01,068 --> 00:20:02,237
- Second one from...
- To the last. Yeah.
526
00:20:02,238 --> 00:20:04,066
Yeah, second from the last. And, um...
527
00:20:04,789 --> 00:20:06,677
it was weird, because it was taken.
528
00:20:07,504 --> 00:20:10,303
It was occupied, and yet all
the other stalls were empty.
529
00:20:10,328 --> 00:20:11,236
Mm.
530
00:20:11,238 --> 00:20:13,777
And so I'm looking into
that little divider.
531
00:20:13,778 --> 00:20:15,777
You know, the little
space, like, a quarter inch,
532
00:20:15,778 --> 00:20:17,917
- between the wall and the door?
- Mm-hmm.
533
00:20:18,735 --> 00:20:21,544
And I see an eye, one single eye,
534
00:20:21,736 --> 00:20:24,155
looking through that
little space, looking at me.
535
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:25,485
And my eye looks
536
00:20:25,486 --> 00:20:27,202
at that eye, and it's Frizell.
537
00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:29,153
- Right.
- And it was
538
00:20:29,208 --> 00:20:32,007
a profound, charged moment
between two human beings.
539
00:20:32,032 --> 00:20:33,086
Like sexually?
540
00:20:33,105 --> 00:20:36,684
No, not every charged moment
is a sexual charged moment.
541
00:20:36,685 --> 00:20:38,790
- Right.
- This was just a moment between
542
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:40,895
two men.
543
00:20:40,895 --> 00:20:41,831
Mm.
544
00:20:42,599 --> 00:20:45,388
And then, today, he dies on the toilet?
545
00:20:45,817 --> 00:20:47,363
- Hmm?
- Do you see?
546
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,273
That's got to mean something.
547
00:20:49,723 --> 00:20:52,651
Maybe. Or maybe... nothing.
548
00:20:53,810 --> 00:20:55,599
Do you think that this story
549
00:20:55,959 --> 00:20:57,991
forms the basis of a good eulogy?
550
00:20:59,020 --> 00:21:00,350
If it's one of those...
551
00:21:01,020 --> 00:21:04,349
meandering, long-winded, confusing,
552
00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:06,599
and ultimately unsatisfying funerals,
553
00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:09,076
- I think this story could fit perfectly.
- Mm.
554
00:21:10,272 --> 00:21:11,599
You should contact the family.
555
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:13,772
I will. I will.
556
00:21:13,994 --> 00:21:15,110
GREG: Base to car.
557
00:21:17,264 --> 00:21:18,363
[SIGHS]
558
00:21:18,364 --> 00:21:20,363
Uh, you're not a base, Greg.
559
00:21:21,283 --> 00:21:23,823
Man, it's quiet tonight, don't you think?
560
00:21:24,846 --> 00:21:26,822
World moves so fast these days.
561
00:21:27,302 --> 00:21:30,953
You know, people used
to play chess by mail.
562
00:21:31,745 --> 00:21:32,823
By mail!
563
00:21:33,302 --> 00:21:36,379
I mean, can you imagine a
single human being capable
564
00:21:36,404 --> 00:21:38,118
of that kind of patience?
565
00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:40,712
- It's inconceivable.
- Uh, Greg,
566
00:21:40,713 --> 00:21:42,712
is there an actual reason you called in?
567
00:21:43,216 --> 00:21:44,752
Yeah, good news.
568
00:21:44,753 --> 00:21:45,981
I found my ammo.
569
00:21:47,182 --> 00:21:49,292
Didn't know you lost
them. That's great news
570
00:21:49,293 --> 00:21:51,002
with a happy ending. Over and out.
571
00:21:51,003 --> 00:21:54,252
Well, now we play the
game of Guess Where It Was.
572
00:21:54,253 --> 00:21:56,962
TOLBECK: Ooh, um, in a desk drawer?
573
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:58,422
No.
574
00:21:58,423 --> 00:21:59,542
It was in the teapot.
575
00:21:59,543 --> 00:22:01,542
Aw, I was gonna say teapot.
576
00:22:01,543 --> 00:22:03,083
- Over.
- Were you?
577
00:22:03,383 --> 00:22:05,172
Listen, I can't help but think
578
00:22:05,173 --> 00:22:08,725
this whole thing is gonna
end in a... Mexican standoff.
579
00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:11,529
Is that okay to say?
580
00:22:11,530 --> 00:22:14,659
Or is it "Hispanic standoff"? Or "Latino"?
581
00:22:14,660 --> 00:22:16,692
Or "Latina"? Listen,
582
00:22:17,679 --> 00:22:19,151
if I take a hit,
583
00:22:20,161 --> 00:22:23,752
would you do me a favor and
both of you just turn away?
584
00:22:25,557 --> 00:22:29,237
Death is an adventure I
would like to go on alone.
585
00:22:30,179 --> 00:22:32,744
Also, my, uh, next of
kin is Sarah Mulroney.
586
00:22:32,776 --> 00:22:34,842
She's my ex-wife, and, uh,
587
00:22:35,366 --> 00:22:37,552
she had a better lawyer than I did.
588
00:22:37,736 --> 00:22:40,065
A man's sexual history
589
00:22:40,363 --> 00:22:42,197
will be written by the victors,
590
00:22:42,284 --> 00:22:43,763
will it not? [CLICKS TONGUE]
591
00:22:44,074 --> 00:22:45,646
Listen, just tell her...
592
00:22:46,549 --> 00:22:47,852
that I love her.
593
00:22:49,275 --> 00:22:50,468
No, actually,
594
00:22:50,492 --> 00:22:52,280
last time I saw her, she said,
595
00:22:53,069 --> 00:22:54,689
"How can you live like this?"
596
00:22:54,744 --> 00:22:57,262
Tell her, "He doesn't have to. He's dead."
597
00:22:57,534 --> 00:22:59,313
See if you can get a tear out of her.
598
00:22:59,313 --> 00:23:00,414
You won't.
599
00:23:00,813 --> 00:23:01,812
Bye.
600
00:23:03,353 --> 00:23:05,602
?
601
00:23:05,603 --> 00:23:08,062
MARCO: Oh, what the fuck?
602
00:23:08,063 --> 00:23:10,432
Dude! I know what you're up to, okay?
603
00:23:10,433 --> 00:23:12,190
You are purposefully leaving
604
00:23:12,190 --> 00:23:14,319
just enough space at the
top of the piss bucket
605
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:18,069
that I go and fill it up, which
means I have to take it out.
606
00:23:18,094 --> 00:23:19,180
What's the rule?
607
00:23:19,205 --> 00:23:21,259
The rule is, whoever tops
it off has to take it out.
608
00:23:21,303 --> 00:23:22,265
Is it full?
609
00:23:22,290 --> 00:23:23,502
That's what... [GROANS]
610
00:23:23,503 --> 00:23:25,212
You know what, next time,
611
00:23:25,213 --> 00:23:27,092
- you're taking it out. Okay?
- If I fill it up,
612
00:23:27,132 --> 00:23:28,421
- I'll take it out.
- You're taking it out next time.
613
00:23:28,445 --> 00:23:29,774
I don't care if it's full or not.
614
00:23:29,806 --> 00:23:31,437
You're taking it out next time, Angus.
615
00:23:31,502 --> 00:23:32,395
Goddamn it.
616
00:23:33,534 --> 00:23:36,206
- [CLATTER]
- Oh, goddamn it! I spilled it.
617
00:23:36,418 --> 00:23:40,077
Son of a bitch! It's-it's
gonna get on the beds, Angus.
618
00:23:40,078 --> 00:23:41,577
It's g... The piss is...
619
00:23:41,578 --> 00:23:42,888
Oh, it's moving!
620
00:23:42,888 --> 00:23:44,613
We must be at a slant!
621
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:46,919
[SIREN WAILING ON VIDEO]
622
00:23:46,991 --> 00:23:48,490
Could you turn that down a little?
623
00:23:49,060 --> 00:23:50,078
You want to watch?
624
00:23:50,078 --> 00:23:51,392
No, I don't want to watch.
625
00:23:55,078 --> 00:23:56,467
[SIGHS]
626
00:23:56,467 --> 00:23:59,006
GREG: I just observed a male,
627
00:23:59,053 --> 00:24:01,818
uh, five-foot, ten-inch, wearing jeans,
628
00:24:01,849 --> 00:24:04,943
and he was walking southwest on foot.
629
00:24:08,544 --> 00:24:09,518
I see him.
630
00:24:09,543 --> 00:24:12,218
Is it the break you were
looking for? Did I do...
631
00:24:12,219 --> 00:24:13,768
I'm gonna assume this is the break.
632
00:24:13,769 --> 00:24:15,640
I'm-I'm standing by.
633
00:24:16,870 --> 00:24:17,927
[EXHALES]
634
00:24:17,952 --> 00:24:19,702
Hey, have we seen that guy before?
635
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,433
Um, yeah, I guess so.
636
00:24:24,195 --> 00:24:26,353
Oh, I'm sorry, am I interrupting your show?
637
00:24:26,655 --> 00:24:29,654
[SIGHS] Um, honestly, a little, yes.
638
00:24:29,655 --> 00:24:30,864
This is a good part.
639
00:24:31,499 --> 00:24:33,526
Uh, Dispatch, this is Car 27.
640
00:24:33,526 --> 00:24:35,275
We have an unknown suspect loitering
641
00:24:35,276 --> 00:24:36,565
outside target location.
642
00:24:36,566 --> 00:24:38,993
Copy. Car 27, proceed with caution.
643
00:24:39,236 --> 00:24:41,355
Detective Tolbeck is about
to make further investigation.
644
00:24:41,356 --> 00:24:42,356
Stand by.
645
00:24:42,357 --> 00:24:44,395
- Copy that.
- Me?
646
00:24:44,396 --> 00:24:45,775
- Off you go.
- Why me?
647
00:24:45,776 --> 00:24:48,565
Look, it's not illegal
to walk around at night.
648
00:24:48,566 --> 00:24:49,641
Give me a break.
649
00:24:49,666 --> 00:24:51,605
No, no, but it is illegal to pee in public.
650
00:24:52,152 --> 00:24:53,728
- Chop, chop.
- Come on,
651
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,349
- don't be such a square, man.
- Will you just do your fucking job?
652
00:24:56,350 --> 00:24:59,264
Something's happening, for once.
Would you put your phone down?
653
00:24:59,319 --> 00:25:01,074
- Okay, fine.
- Thank you very much.
654
00:25:01,165 --> 00:25:03,044
- You got all your stuff?
- Yes.
655
00:25:03,045 --> 00:25:05,204
- You got your body cam?
- No. I don't want to wear a body cam.
656
00:25:05,205 --> 00:25:06,874
Come on, man. We got to wear all this shit.
657
00:25:06,875 --> 00:25:09,334
It's on your jacket.
Just wear it. All right?
658
00:25:09,335 --> 00:25:11,744
- Okay?
- God. This is too much stuff.
659
00:25:11,745 --> 00:25:13,588
- Just do it.
- Okay, fine.
660
00:25:18,187 --> 00:25:19,358
[SIGHS]
661
00:25:21,085 --> 00:25:23,204
[URINATING]
662
00:25:23,205 --> 00:25:25,204
- Hi. Excuse me, sir.
- Whoa! What the fuck?
663
00:25:25,205 --> 00:25:27,164
Oh, take it easy. It's okay.
664
00:25:27,165 --> 00:25:28,414
Where the fuck did you come from?
665
00:25:28,686 --> 00:25:30,605
Well, I can't tell you where I came from.
666
00:25:30,606 --> 00:25:32,315
Oh, I don't care. Go back there.
667
00:25:32,316 --> 00:25:34,225
- Jesus Christ.
- Uh, okay, take it easy.
668
00:25:34,226 --> 00:25:36,435
- What-what are you doing out here?
- What am I doing out...
669
00:25:36,436 --> 00:25:38,515
Isn't it obvious? I'm taking a piss, guy.
670
00:25:38,516 --> 00:25:40,168
Okay, well, it's against the law to pee...
671
00:25:40,193 --> 00:25:41,344
Why don't you fuck off...
672
00:25:41,414 --> 00:25:42,475
- [CLOWN HORN RINGTONE PLAYS]
- Aw, shit.
673
00:25:42,476 --> 00:25:44,316
- Gun! Gun! Gun!
- What? No...
674
00:25:50,580 --> 00:25:51,652
[SIGHS]
675
00:25:51,677 --> 00:25:52,985
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
676
00:25:52,985 --> 00:25:54,137
Cullen!
677
00:25:55,039 --> 00:25:56,213
Oh, shit.
678
00:25:56,913 --> 00:25:58,597
Come... come here.
679
00:25:59,105 --> 00:26:01,105
["SOMETIMES A PONY GETS
DEPRESSED" BY SILVER JEWS PLAYS]
680
00:26:11,065 --> 00:26:15,815
? Where does an animal sleep
when the ground is wet? ?
681
00:26:18,695 --> 00:26:22,655
? Cows in the ballroom, chickens
in the farmer's Corvette ?
682
00:26:25,695 --> 00:26:29,694
? Sometimes a pony, sometimes a pony ?
683
00:26:29,695 --> 00:26:32,655
? Sometimes a pony gets depressed ?
684
00:26:33,065 --> 00:26:37,025
? How does an animal see
once the sun is set? ?
685
00:26:37,075 --> 00:26:41,625
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